if your primary source of information on transmascs is by anyone else but a transmasc, it's not a reliable resource. it's currently viewed as perfectly okay for everyone BUT transmascs to talk about our experience- and in fact, it's encouraged for people to listen to everyone but us, because according to other people we're unreliable narrators, we "skew the truth," we "lie", that transmascs "already have too much space and too many people talking about transmasc issues", and that testosterone turns us into "irrational monsters".
i get it: people's internalized misogyny makes them treat us like we're too stupid to relay our own lived experiences because we're just "dumb, confused women." we get it- your misogyny is palpable. it morphs into a new, heinous experience- transandrophobia- once people begin telling us testosterone makes us evil, antimasculism begins to bleed into the misogyny that built this experience and turns it into something even more insideous.
people will do everything in their power to listen to everyone else talk about our experience, but when it comes to us advocating for ourselves, that's not allowed. everyone wants to speak for us, to tell us what their perception on transmasculinity is based off of a few passing experiences with transmascs so they "know what it's all about".
please seek out transmasculine people to listen to about our lived experience. everyone who attempts to speak for us has an agenda. don't listen to anyone but the source. outside speculation has no place when it comes to discussing the transmasculine experience, especially when it comes to saving young transmascs from feeling lost and totally alone
no one can tell our stories but us. stop being okay with people who aren't transmasc spreading lies about what we live through. our experiences need to be heard. let us speak for ourselves. stop putting words in our mouths and telling US how we live our lives
btw there's so much discourse on my feed rn and I think I need some people to just step off of tumblr and meet people outside their circles. Does wonders for you btw x
Diversity win! Transfeminists™ now claiming trans woman is several men pretending to be a woman!
"you can't be a bisexual lesbian, that doesn't make sense."
"you can't be a bisexual gay, that doesn't make sense."
You're loved, you're appreciated, you matter <3
Don't ever forget that.
Aw, thank you!
(also your blog has very good therian stuff that I like to send to my wife! She got that dog in her so she loves to see your posts :3)
i hope every trans man egg finds the community and support he needs to comfortably be himself
your masculinity does not make you scary
your masculine identity is not a threat or betrayal to women
it's okay to want hormones and/or surgery to feel more comfortable in your body
it's okay to want to dress and act as masculine as you'd like, whatever that means for you
there are people out there who will accept you for you
not everyone is going to project their fears and traumas onto you. many people are actively working on this, in fact
it's okay to love other men as a man
it's okay to be a man
trans man egg, i hope you get everything you need to live a happy and comfortable life as yourself
I kind of find it interesting (along with disheartening and downright enraging) how the online queer community is stuck in a constant and endless toxic discourse loop. Each time, we are targeting a new ingroup to constantly harass, bar from spaces, and twitter threads about how this identity-is-so-problematic, and if you support it you're Hitler incarnate and also you're on 200 DNI lists.
Whether it's nonbinary people, "tucutes", xenogenders, neopronouns, asexuals, bisexuals, trans women, trans men, girlfags, lesboys, bi lesbians etc. It's always the same thing.
"We must stop these 'harmful identities' and conservatives will finally love us and we will solve homophobia and transphobia forever if we get rid of boydykes and girlfags! And trust me, when this happened to nonbinary people it was TOTALLY unjustified, but it's totally for a good reason this time!"
Like, do you guys not see this? Am I actually crazy or is it just the same loop over and over. And like in my last post about transandrophobia, if you come to this post discoursing, I'll be laughing in your face for how pathetic this all is.
When any word like this gains traction, there will always be a small number of people who use it to hurt others.
The important thing is to keep using it anyway, and to use it correctly! Because if you don't, a marginalized group of people loses a term that helps them discuss their oppression, and a few jackasses gain a new word they can use to bully people and smear the rest of the community.
Keep using transandrophobia, deplatform the ones using it to be a bigot, and ignore people like this. It's not a dogwhistle. Don't let them make it into one!
I wish you wouldn't use the term transandrophobia. I understand transmascs do deserve language to speak on their oppression, but the way the term transandrophobia in specific has been used has twisted it into a transmisogynistic dog whistle sadly. Transandromisia and androqueerphobia are much nicer terms that have the same meaning without the transmisogynistic connotations associated with the words, and I've seen you use those terms before, so it's disheartening to see you suddenly begin using transandrophobia instead.
People say the same thing about androqueerphobia and transandromisia. Not to mention androqueerphobia is a much broader term for prejudice against queer masculinity generally.
There's nothing transmisogynistic about the word transandrophobia. Yeah, some bigots are going to use it because it gained traction as a useful term in discussion. This is true of literally every useful word ever. I have seen people say the most vile intersexist shit in the name of 'fighting transmisogyny' and I don't sit here and call transfeminism 'transmisogyny theory' and insist it's inherently intersexist. Because I understand that individual assholes misuse useful terms all the damn time.
People who say the word transandrophobia is transmisogynistic aren't actually talking about the word, they're upset about transmascs talking about their lives. That's bigoted and is a perfect example of why the word transandrophobia should exist. If you even look at the people who argue against it, they're always saying that there is no unique experience with oppression caused by being a trans man- that trans men only experience 'just transphobia' and there is no oppression inherent to transmasculinity. That's dismissive and frankly rude as fuck. There's no word that will satisfy the people who think trans men/mascs are simply incapable of speaking for themselves/believe they are bigoted for doing so.
I think we should allow transmascs to have their own terms, for fuck's sake. If you're not transmasculine, you don't get a say in this at all. You can support a group of marginalized people and what they say or you can be a bigot against them, it's very simple.
I'm never gonna get over the fact that in one conversation someone said "trans men are seen as deviant women" and then another person in the same conversation asked "why would trans men be the targets of misogyny? they're men!" It was so funny and fucking weird that I had to laugh and block everyone involved
Queer 👏 people 👏 are 👏 not 👏 all 👏 fucking 👏 activists 👏
Stop quizzing us on queer history and asking us questions we aren’t qualified to answer about the world and about politics and about our identities
Stop trying to back us into a corner so you can justify your discrimination on the basis that we don’t know what we’re talking about or can’t “defend” ourselves to you
Stop treating every queer person that stands up and says “I want to be treated like a person” as if they’re an activist
Cut that bullshit out
Marginalised people just want to exist and be happy
I don’t know everything, and that doesn’t make me undeserving of your respect or my human rights you fucker
I don’t even owe you the stuff I do know- I still am entitled to basic fucking respect
i feel like the entire online queer community collectively forgot, or rather pretends that queer allies don't exist. like. we literally have a term and even a flag for queer allies. they exist. assuming every single perisex cishet person hates queer people isn't the way to go. allies are a very real and important part of our community. allies challenge the status quo by saying, i'm not queer, but i support what you're doing. they exist. they're out there- and yes, many of them are cishet men.
please don't forget this, or pretend that they don't exist: allies are an extremely important part of our history, community, and safety.
Nix, They/Them, Queer, 20s Sporadically active.Do not gender me.
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