Woooo Signed Up 👀‼️

🌟 RANKING REMUS LUPIN’S BEST "WEREWOLF CARD" EXCUSES 🌟

🥉 TIER 3: LOW EFFORT, BUT IT WORKS

5. "I'm experiencing a rare sensitivity to [current weather]."

Used For: Avoiding outdoor activities (changes reason based on conditions)

Effectiveness: 7/10 - Teachers assume it's a chronic condition and stop questioning

4. "My circadian rhythms require recalibration."

Used For: Skipping early morning classes

Effectiveness: 6/10 - McGonagall's eyebrow twitches but she allows it once per lunar cycle

🥈 TIER 2: MEDIUM-EFFORT LIES WITH A STRAIGHT FACE

3. "The moon’s in retrograde." (Not a real thing.)

Used For: Avoiding having to watch Quidditch practices (James buys it; Sirius cackles).

Effectiveness: 8/10 – James panics and asks if he needs chicken soup.

2. "I've developed an unfortunate reaction to [nearby object]." (gestures vaguely)

Used For: Leaving uncomfortable situations

Effectiveness: 8/10 - Works best in potions class where plausible accidents happen

🏆 TIER 1: ABSOLUTE MASTERPIECES OF DECEIT

1. "I'm presently engaged in critical lunar research."

Used For: Leaving any situation with an air of academic importance

Effectiveness: ∞/10 - Works best when said while holding a chocolate bar as if it's research equipment

0. "I’m legally required to lie down." (No such law exists.)

Used For: Everything. Everything.

Effectiveness: ∞/10 – Even McGonagall lets it slide once.

HONORABLE MENTION (THE ONE TIME IT FAILED):

"I can’t, I’m allergic to... this conversation."

Used On: Sirius, who immediately throws a pillow at him.

Verdict: "Try harder, Moony."

Playing w Remus like he's a Barbie doll but in the way where I'm cutting his hair off and drawing all over his face with markers before flinging him off the balcony

"I write for my own enjoyment"

And

"I'm happy when people interact with my writing"

Are two sentences that can coexist!

hypothetically let's say getting struck by the killing curse is similar to getting stuck by lightning

now with that we can say that hypothetically baby Harry Potter could lose part of his hearing from that so may I introduce deaf Harry Potter

from age one to six he can't hear at least 80% of what people are saying. He gets by. The Dursleys always yell at him and aggressively point at what he was supposed to do. After a while he generally understands what's going on by catching a few words from their yells and context clues. He got glasses but only because he kept missing the edges of doorways and earning bruises that raised teacher's eyebrows. They worried about them assuming they were abusing him (obviously not look he's wearing glasses 🤪) Harry taking speech therapy at school bc his parents don't like the way he talks

Seven year old Harry Potter getting kidnapped by an Azkaban escapee and a book keeper covered in scars. Sirius and Remus assuming Harry just didn't like them or trust them because well they did kidnap him. They thought for weeks that Harry was just giving them the cold shoulder. They only figured it out when Harry would stand real close to the speakers attached to the record player and bounce to the bass.

Seven (and a half) year old Harry Potter finally getting hearing aids with his two dads and flipping the fuck out when he hears them for the first time. Harry Potter running around and following Sirius and Remus throughout their daily habits to learn all the new sounds. Birds chirping in their front yard. Remus' laugh and Sirius' whispers of good morning.

Harry Potter pressing his ear against the side of the fridge to hear the hum coming from inside. Harry learning that the vacuum cleaner is a lot louder than he thought it was and ripping his hearing aids off the moment he sees Remus lugging it out from the closet. Harry learning school is way louder than he thought it was and having to take his hearing aids case with him to school in his pocket because he kept taking them off so much. Harry finding out that his parents cooking in the kitchen makes a lot of fascinating noises and accidently burning the palm of his hand on the oven because he wanted to hear the sizzling better. Harry almost giving Sirius a heart attack by the scream he let out from the burn. Harry realizing he makes noise too and what he thought was a silent way to make his chest buzz was actually humming.

Harry Potter and his two dads learning Sign together at a community class in the library. Harry finding more kids like him with hearing aids and some who don't talk at all and only sign. Harry finding all forms of families learning to sign and learning he's not so alone at all. Harry taking speech therapy until he's 12 so he can communicate with his hearing friends at the park too

Deaf Harry Potter wearing his hearing aids with pride as he prances into the great hall for the first time. McGonagall's stomach dropped, realizing she has a combination of James Potter and Sirius Black on her hands now and the next seven years of her career. Deaf Harry Potter teaching his friends curse words in sign and getting his parents called up to the school. Deaf Harry earned no punishment from his parents, both of them laughing their asses off. Ron learning Sign through private lessons with Harry after classes. Hermione scouring the library for books on sign language and learning through the pictures and Harry's corrections.

The Gryffindor quidditch team communicating with Sign in air. Harry over using the "I've heard enough." *takes off hearing aids* joke with the teachers he doesn't like he lands himself detention. Ron, Neville, Dean, and Seamus adjusting to Harry's flashing light alarm and making sure their curtains are tightly closed. Sirius and Remus used to flashing the light switch to get Harry's attention they start accidentally doing it in inappropriate places. Remus flashes the library lights to get his coworkers attention and causes a whole crowd of preschoolers visiting at reading hour to freak out.

In third year Harry trys contacts because he's tired of his hearing aids and glasses fighting for space on his ears. Harry at the end of third year realizing he hates contacts and goes back to glasses

Deaf Harry signing answers to his friends behind his back when the teacher isn't looking. Harry takes his hearing aids off at home bc he knows he doesn't need them but puts them back on as his dads start making dinner. He always finds comfort in the sounds of the kitchen and when dinner rolls around he keeps them on. He knows dinner is the most likely time he'll hear his parents' laughter.

I'll stop here but like I love him

the eighth and final chapter of BRTC is up! a huge thank you to everyone who has been so enthusiastic and encouraging on tumblr and on ao3 :)

it’s so bittersweet to be saying goodbye to this version of Remus and this little universe but i’m really happy with where it ends and i’m very proud of it. and i have more fics in the works! i have several ideas planned out and have already begun drafting the next one

things rjl would cry over

Unread books

A shop having an opening ceremony but no customers are there

Deactivated tumblr accounts

A bug dying

The pyramids

The pig war (he feels bad 4 the pig)

A broken laptop that's unfixable

small cars

Baby ducks

A post w 3 notes

An ad poster that has a tear in it

loose change

omg the betrayal…i am surrounded by coffee lovers!! 😭

get to know your mutuals game! <3

tagged by @rae-lune and @madefortherain! ty both, loved getting to know you more

favorite color: yellow!! yellow is the best color

last song: this is the last one i remember but technically not the actual last one i am so very sorry

currently reading: The Hunger Games but i have not touched it in quite a few days oops. fic wise, hmm…Hey, Sharpshooter by @tortoisebore technically but also have not touched that in a hot second.

currently watching: nothing :( in need of a new show tbh but i’m wildly picky

currently craving: a hug tbh

coffee or tea: TEA and if you say coffee you’re wrong. WRONG.

np tagging @outromoonyy @jam-pots @katnissinanotheruniverse! would love to get to know y’all a bit <3

if I ever reblog something that’s AI please tell me so I can delete it because I don’t want that absolute slop on my flawless tumblr

I challenged myself to paint at least(!) one Sirius Black art a month this year, so here is the April painting! And as I haven’t had much time in April, I made a more detailed artwork :') Well, but it was a lot of fun! I also added a close up because I really like his face in this one :)