Borrowed Time
modern!cregan stark x reader
words: 17.4k
notes: this was requested!!
You were in the middle of highlighting your history notes when Sara dropped into the seat across from you, that familiar mischievous glint in her eyes. Before you could even ask what she wanted, Jace appeared beside her, wearing an equally suspicious grin.
"No," you said immediately, returning to your notes. "Whatever it is, no."
"You haven't even heard what we're going to say," Jace protested, pulling out a chair and settling in. The library was quiet around you, afternoon sunlight streaming through the tall windows.
"I don't need to hear it. That look on both your faces means trouble," you said, capping your highlighter. "Last time you had that look, we ended up getting kicked out of that coffee shop on Fifth."
"That was one time," Sara waved her hand dismissively. "And the barista was totally overreacting. How were we supposed to know the chairs weren't meant to be stacked?"
"They were clearly not meant to be stacked, Sara."
"Ancient history," Jace cut in, leaning forward. "This is actually about your academic future. We're putting together a study group for Martinez's class."
You paused, eyeing them both suspiciously. "Political Science?"
"The very same," Sara nodded, her dark hair falling over her shoulder. "The one you were ranting about last week at dinner. What was it you said? Something about how the theories were, and I quote, 'slowly sucking your soul out through your eyeballs'?"
"I was being dramatic," you muttered, though you couldn't quite meet her eyes. The truth was, you'd been struggling more than you wanted to admit.
"Were you though?" Jace reached over and picked up your textbook, flipping through the rainbow of highlighted pages. "Because this looks like a cry for help. What does pink even mean?"
You snatched the book back. "Pink is for... important things."
"Everything is highlighted pink!"
"Everything is important!"
Sara tried to suppress her laugh but failed. "This is exactly why you need our study group. We've got a solid plan – twice a week, two hours max. We can share notes, discuss the readings..."
"Who else is in it?" you asked, trying to sound casual even as suspicion crept in. They were being far too enthusiastic about this.
The look Sara and Jace exchanged was quick, but you caught it. Years of friendship had taught you to recognize their silent conversations.
Sara said carefully, suddenly very interested in straightening her sleeve. "Me, Jace... and my brother."
Your stomach did an odd little flip. Cregan. Of course it would be Cregan. Sara's half-brother, Jace's best friend, and quite possibly the most intimidating person you'd ever met – not because he was mean or hostile, but because he seemed to exist in a completely different orbit than yours despite sharing the same friend group. You'd seen him plenty of times over the past year, usually deep in animated conversation with Jace or quietly sitting while the rest of you chatted. He'd never been anything but polite, but there was always this careful distance, as if he was deliberately keeping you at arm's length.
"Your brother," you repeated slowly. "The one who never speaks to me?"
"He speaks to you!" Sara protested.
"'Excuse me' and ‘can i borrow a pen’ don't count as speaking to me, Sara."
"He's just... quiet," Jace jumped in. "You know how he is. But he's got the highest grade in the class. Like, by a lot. And he actually takes good notes, unlike some people." He pointedly looked at his own notebook, which appeared to be covered in what might have been either class notes or an elaborate doodle of a dragon. It was hard to tell.
You bit your lip, considering. The idea of spending extended time with someone who seemed to find you completely uninteresting wasn't exactly appealing, but you really did need help with the course. And maybe, you thought, it wouldn't be so bad with Sara and Jace there as buffers.
"Fine," you sighed, already wondering if you'd regret this. "But if it gets weird–"
"It won't!" Sara bounced up from her chair, beaming. "First session's tomorrow at four. We'll be in study room C. It's going to be great!"
"Super great!" Jace agreed, gathering his things. "Life-changing, even. You'll thank us later."
As they walked away, you couldn't shake the feeling that they looked far too pleased with themselves.
The next afternoon, you arrived at study room C a few minutes early, half-expecting Jace and Sara to already be there, goofing off or laying out some kind of elaborate prank. But when you pushed the door open, the only person inside was Cregan.
He looked up from his notebook, brows lifting slightly in surprise before settling back into his usual neutral expression. He was seated at the far end of the table, his laptop open, a few books stacked neatly beside him. Unlike Jace’s chaotic scrawl or Sara’s color-coded monstrosity of a planner, his notes were meticulously organized – paragraphs written in a clean, even script, highlighted sparingly.
You hesitated in the doorway. “Am I early?”
Cregan shook his head. “They’re late.”
That sounded about right. You stepped inside, setting your bag down as you tried to ignore the awkward weight of silence stretching between you. Cregan didn’t offer any small talk, just went back to his notes, flipping a page with practiced ease.
You exhaled slowly, pulling out your own notebook and flipping it open. A moment passed. Then another. The silence became unbearable.
“So,” you said, glancing at him. “You actually volunteered for this?”
Cregan’s lips twitched, the ghost of a smile there and gone before you could fully register it. “Not exactly.”
You huffed a quiet laugh. “Let me guess. Sara roped you into it?”
“She has a way of convincing people.”
“That’s one way to put it,” you muttered, twirling your pen between your fingers. “She didn’t tell me you were basically carrying the class, though.”
“I wouldn’t say that.”
“She would. And Jace. Apparently, your notes are legendary.”
He glanced at you then, a flicker of amusement in his dark eyes. “I just write things down.”
“Unlike Jace.”
That actually earned you a short laugh – low and warm, a sound you weren’t sure you’d ever heard from him before. Something in your chest tightened at it.
The door banged open before you could process that feeling, and Sara and Jace tumbled in, both out of breath.
“Sorry, sorry,” Sara panted, dropping into a chair. “There was a situation.”
“Jace knocked over a whole display in the library cafe,” she continued as Jace groaned, dropping his head onto the table. “It was tragic.”
“I maintain it was too close to the counter,” he mumbled into the wood.
You caught Cregan watching his sister and best friend with what looked like fond exasperation, and for a moment, you envied how easy they all were with each other. How naturally they fit together. You'd known Jace since freshman year, and through him, Sara, but Cregan had always felt like someone just out of reach – present but never quite part of your circle.
"Right," Sara said, finally catching her breath. "Where were we? Political theory? The reading responses due next week?"
"The Weber analysis," Cregan supplied quietly, and you noticed how his voice changed when he spoke to them – looser, more familiar. It shouldn't have bothered you, but something about it sat heavy in your stomach.
"Oh right, Weber," Jace lifted his head from the table, suddenly animated. "The guy with all the bureaucracy stuff."
"That's... one way to put it," Cregan said, and you could hear the hint of amusement in his voice. He turned to a specific page in his notebook, and you watched as he easily fell into conversation with Jace about the reading, their words flowing back and forth with the ease of years of friendship.
You tried to focus on your own notes, but your attention kept drifting to the way Cregan's entire demeanor had shifted. Gone was the careful restraint from earlier – now his hands moved as he spoke, emphasizing points about social stratification and authority structures. His voice carried more inflection, and occasionally he'd even smile at Jace's terrible political theory puns.
"Hey," Sara's voice was soft beside you, making you jump slightly. You hadn't even noticed her move closer. "You okay? You're kind of staring at your blank page pretty intensely."
"What? Oh, yeah," you quickly scribbled down the date, just to look busy. "Just trying to keep up."
Sara hummed thoughtfully, her eyes darting between you and her brother. "You know," she said, keeping her voice low, "he's not actually as intimidating as he seems."
"I don't find him intimidating," you protested, perhaps a bit too quickly.
"Right," she drawled, clearly unconvinced. "That's why you've barely said two words to him in the past year."
"That's not true," you started, but she cut you off with a knowing look.
"It's okay. He's not great at... people. Well, new people," she amended, glancing at her brother who was now rolling his eyes at something Jace had said. "Just give it time."
Before you could respond, Cregan's voice cut through your whispered conversation: "If we're actually going to study, we should probably start with the main concepts."
You looked up to find him watching you and Sara, his expression unreadable once again. The warmth from his conversation with Jace had vanished, replaced by that familiar distance that made you feel like you were somehow intruding, even though you'd been invited to be there.
"Right," you said, forcing yourself to meet his gaze. "The main concepts. Of course."
As he began outlining Weber's theory of social action, you couldn't help but wonder if Sara was right about giving it time. Because right now, it felt like no amount of time would bridge whatever carefully maintained distance Cregan seemed determined to keep between you.
About halfway through the session, Jace let out a dramatic sigh, slumping back in his chair. "I can't focus. The lights in here are way too bright."
Sara snorted. "The lights are fine, you big baby."
"No, they're definitely giving me a headache," Jace insisted, throwing an arm over his eyes. "We should do this somewhere else next time. Like, I don't know..." He paused for effect. "My place?"
You raised an eyebrow. "You mean the apartment that looked like a tornado hit it last time I was there?"
"It's not that bad!"
"Jace, there was a pizza box being used as a mousepad."
A low chuckle came from across the table, and you looked over to find Cregan trying to hide his amusement behind his hand. The sound made your stomach do that weird flip again.
"See?" Jace gestured wildly. "Even Cregan agrees we should move locations. It's his apartment too, and he's much neater than me."
"That's not exactly difficult," Cregan murmured, earning another laugh from you.
"Fine, gang up on me," Jace pouted. "But seriously, these lights are killing me."
Sara rolled her eyes. "Maybe if you actually looked at your notes instead of your phone..."
As they bickered, Cregan turned his attention back to the material at hand. "So, Weber's concept of social action..." He glanced at your notes and paused, taking in the rainbow explosion of highlights and the scattered notes in the margins.
Heat crept up your neck. "I know it's a mess," you said quickly. "I just... highlight things that seem important."
"Everything seems important?" There was no judgment in his voice, just that slight hint of amusement you were starting to recognize.
"Better safe than sorry?" you offered weakly.
He nodded thoughtfully, then slid his notebook slightly closer to you. "Here," he said quietly. "This might help structure it better." His neat handwriting laid out the concepts in clear, logical progression, with key points underlined rather than highlighted.
You leaned in slightly to read, suddenly very aware of how close you were to him. His handwriting was even nicer up close, you noticed, and he'd drawn small diagrams in the margins to illustrate some of the more complex ideas.
"So the rationalization of social action," he began explaining, his voice taking on that teaching tone that made him sound impossibly smart, "can be broken down into these four types..."
You tried to focus on what he was saying, you really did. But there was something about the way he spoke, confident and clear, occasionally gesturing to emphasize a point, that made it hard to concentrate. A strand of dark hair fell across his forehead as he leaned forward to point something out, and you found yourself fighting the urge to brush it back.
"Does that make sense?" he asked, looking up at you suddenly.
"Oh! Um, yes," you stammered, hoping your face wasn't as red as it felt. "The, uh, the four types of social action. Traditional, affective, value-rational, and..." you trailed off, momentarily distracted by how his eyes seemed to catch the light.
"Instrumental-rational," he finished, his lips quirking slightly. Was he amused by your confusion? "We can go over it again if you need."
"No, no, I got it," you said quickly, even as Jace muttered something about the lights still being too bright. "Just... processing."
Cregan nodded, but you could have sworn there was something softer in his expression now, something less distant than before. But before you could be sure, he was already turning the page, moving on to the next concept, and you were left wondering if you'd imagined it.
Out of the corner of your eye, you caught Sara and Jace exchanging one of their looks – the kind that made you feel like you were missing something obvious. Sara's lips were curved in a knowing smile, while Jace waggled his eyebrows in what he probably thought was a subtle manner.
You furrowed your brows at them, a silent question, but they just smiled back innocently. Too innocently. Sara even had the audacity to wink at you before pretending to be extremely interested in her phone.
"So these social institutions," Cregan continued, completely oblivious to the silent conversation happening across the table, "they form the foundation of Weber's bureaucratic theory." His finger traced under a perfectly written line of text, and you couldn't help but notice how even his bullet points were symmetrical. Who even wrote bullet points that neatly?
You bit the inside of your cheek, trying not to feel intimidated by how effortlessly he explained complex theories that had taken you hours to barely grasp. He didn't even need to refer to the textbook – everything just seemed to flow from his mind to his lips with perfect clarity. It was almost unfair, really, how someone could be so... academically put together.
"The key thing to remember," he was saying, tapping his pen against a small diagram he'd drawn, "is how these systems of authority interconnect." His voice had that quiet confidence that came from truly understanding something, not just memorizing it.
You nodded, trying to focus on the actual words and not on how his hand moved across the page, or how he'd occasionally glance up to make sure you were following along. The worst part was that he probably thought you were struggling with the material – which you were, but not entirely for the reasons he might assume.
"Makes perfect sense," you heard yourself say, even though your mind had wandered to wondering if he color-coded his closet as meticulously as he organized his notes.
Sara cleared her throat loudly, making you jump slightly. When you looked up, she and Jace were wearing matching grins that made you want to throw your highlighter at them. Whatever they were thinking, whatever they thought they were seeing, you didn't want to hear it.
Cregan glanced between the three of you, a slight crease appearing between his brows. For a moment, you thought he might ask what was going on, but he just turned back to his notes, that familiar distance settling over him again like a shield.
You bit the inside of your cheek harder, telling yourself it didn't matter. You were here to study, not to analyze why your friends were acting weird, or why Cregan's handwriting was unreasonably perfect, or why you suddenly cared so much about either of those things.
***
The next day found you sitting on Jace and Cregan's surprisingly clean couch (at least this part of the apartment), waiting for Sara and Jace who were now twenty minutes late. You'd texted them both twice, receiving only a vague "on our way!" from Sara and a string of random emojis from Jace that made absolutely no sense.
Cregan sat in the armchair across from you, repeatedly adjusting the stack of books on the coffee table between you. First, he aligned them perfectly with the table's edge. Then he shifted them slightly to the left. Then back to center. You watched as he cleared his throat for what must have been the fifth time in as many minutes.
When you glanced up at him, he offered a quick, almost shy smile before looking away again. It was strange seeing him in his own space – he seemed both more relaxed and somehow more nervous, his usual composed demeanor slightly cracked.
The silence stretched on, not exactly uncomfortable but definitely not comfortable enough to ignore. You watched as he picked up his notebook, then put it down, then picked it up again.
"So," you finally said, desperate to break the quiet, "this is definitely cleaner than I expected."
His lips twitched. "I may have... tidied up a bit."
"A bit?"
"Jace's room is still a disaster," he admitted, and this time his smile stayed longer. "I drew the line at going in there. For my own safety."
You laughed, remembering the pizza-box mousepad. "Probably wise. I'm pretty sure I saw something move under his laundry pile last time."
"That was last week's sandwich," he said with such perfect deadpan delivery that it took you a moment to realize he was joking. When you did, you couldn't help but laugh again, and something in his posture seemed to relax slightly.
"Please tell me you're joking," you said, though you weren't entirely sure you wanted to know.
He raised an eyebrow. "Do you really want me to answer that?"
"You know what? No. No, I don't." You shook your head, still smiling. "How do you live with him? I mean, you're so..." you gestured vaguely at his perfectly organized notes.
"Neurotic?" he supplied, but there was amusement in his voice.
"I was going to say organized, but..." you teased, surprised by how easy it suddenly felt to talk to him.
He ran a hand through his hair, messing it up slightly in a way that was unfairly endearing. "It works, somehow. He's..." Cregan paused, considering his words. "He balances things out. Keeps me from getting too..."
"Neurotic?" you offered, throwing his word back at him.
That earned you another one of those rare laughs, the kind that seemed to surprise even him. "Exactly."
Your phone buzzed then, another text from Sara: Sorry!! Got held up at the library. Start without us?
You looked up to find Cregan checking his own phone, his expression shifting into something you couldn't quite read. "Let me guess," you said. "They're 'on their way'?"
"Apparently there's a 'situation' at the library," he replied, making air quotes with his fingers.
"Of course there is." You slumped back against the couch. "They're not coming, are they?"
"Probably not," he admitted, and was it your imagination, or did he look almost... pleased about that?
"Wait," you said, frowning at your textbook, where the words had started to blur together after an hour of reading. "What's this part about instrumental rationality? I keep getting it mixed up with the other types." You chewed on your pencil, a nervous habit you'd never managed to break.
Cregan shifted closer on the couch – you'd both migrated there to share the coffee table space – and leaned in to look at where you were pointing. Your knees brushed, and neither of you moved away. The warmth of the contact made it harder to focus on the words in front of you.
"That's the one about achieving specific goals," he explained, his voice softer now that he was closer. "It's about choosing the most efficient means to an end. Like..." He paused, thinking. "Like when someone chooses their actions based purely on what will get them the best outcome."
You nodded, still worrying the pencil between your teeth. "So if I'm studying just to get a good grade rather than because I want to learn..."
"Exactly," he said, and you noticed his eyes flick down to your mouth before quickly returning to the textbook. "Or choosing a major based on job prospects rather than personal interest."
"God, you're really smart," you blurted out before you could stop yourself, immediately feeling heat rush to your face. "Like, really, really smart. How do you just... know all this stuff? It's like you don't even need to study, it's all just there in your head."
A flush crept up his neck, and he ducked his head slightly, messing with the corner of his notebook. "I just... read a lot," he said, running a hand through his hair in what you were starting to recognize as a nervous gesture. "You're probably smarter than me."
You let out a surprised laugh. "That's literally the biggest lie you've ever told, and we both know it." You gestured at your highlight-covered notes, which looked like a rainbow had exploded across them. "I'm pretty sure my brain looks like this on the inside. Just... chaos and color-coding."
"That's not–" he started, then seemed to catch himself. His expression grew serious. "Different people learn differently. It doesn't make you any less intelligent. Besides," his lips quirked up slightly, "your way seems more interesting than mine."
"Oh yeah?" you challenged, trying to ignore how his knee was still pressed against yours. "What's so interesting about my highlight explosion method?"
He actually smiled then, reaching over to tap one of your particularly colorful pages. "Well, for one thing, I'm genuinely curious about your highlighting system. Pink for important things, you said?"
"Don't make fun of my system," you groaned, but you were smiling too.
"I'm not," he insisted, and his voice had that warm undertone that you'd only heard him use with Jace and Sara before. "I'm serious. At least your notes have personality. Mine are just..."
"Perfect?" you supplied.
He huffed a laugh. "Boring."
"Are you kidding? Your notes are like... they're like art. Look at these diagrams!" You pointed to one of his careful illustrations. "Meanwhile, my attempts at drawing charts look like they were done by a drunk toddler."
"I like your charts," he said quietly, and something in his tone made you look up at him. He was closer than you'd realized, still leaning in to look at your notes. "They're... creative."
You were suddenly very aware of how little space there was between you, how his shoulder was almost brushing yours, how his knee was still pressed against yours. "Creative is a nice way of saying messy," you managed to say.
"No, I mean it. Look–" He started to say something else, but the sound of keys jingling at the door cut him off.
There was a scraping sound, followed by a quiet curse from what sounded like Jace, then more jingling. The key seemed to miss the lock at least three times before the door finally swung open.
"–telling you, they're probably just–" Sara's whispered voice drifted in, cutting off abruptly as she and Jace entered the apartment. They both stood in the doorway, staring at you and Cregan on the couch with your books spread out between you.
Sara's expression shifted from anticipation to something like disappointment, while Jace's eyebrows shot up comically high. "Have you two actually been studying this whole time?" Jace asked, sounding almost accusatory.
You and Cregan exchanged a confused look. "Why wouldn't we be?" you both asked simultaneously, then glanced at each other in surprise.
"No reason!" Sara said quickly, too quickly. "We just thought... I mean, we were gone so long, and you were alone, and..."
"That we'd what?" you prompted, narrowing your eyes at them. "Start a paper airplane competition with our notes?"
"Nothing!" Sara jumped in. "Nothing at all. Just... surprised by all the... studying."
"I mean, that paper plane competition would have been more interesting than Weber," Jace muttered, earning an elbow in the ribs from Sara.
You noticed Cregan shifting slightly beside you, putting a bit more space between your knees, and immediately missed the warmth. "We're in a study group," he said flatly, but there was a tension in his voice that hadn't been there before. "What else would we be doing?"
Sara and Jace exchanged another one of their looks – the kind that made you want to throw your thoroughly chewed pencil at them. "Right," Sara said, dragging out the word. "The study group. Anyway! What did we miss?"
"Weber's theory of rationalization," you said, trying to ignore the knowing smirks they were both wearing. "Which you'd know if you'd actually been at the library like you said."
"We were!" Jace protested, but his guilty expression said otherwise. "There was a whole... thing. With books. And... shelves. Very serious library emergency."
"Very convincing," Cregan muttered, just loud enough for you to hear. You bit back a smile, catching his eye for a moment before quickly looking away.
"Well," Sara declared, dropping into an armchair with far too much enthusiasm, "we're here now. So, instrumental rationality? Anyone? Bueller?"
You groaned, slumping back against the couch. "We literally just went over that."
"Perfect timing then," Jace grinned, sprawling across the other chair. "You can explain it to us. Since you two have been studying so diligently and all."
"Unlike some people," Cregan added dryly, and you had to bite your lip to keep from laughing at Jace's offended expression.
"I've been studying!" Jace protested. "Just... you know, in my own way."
"Is that what you call sleeping with your textbook under your pillow?" Cregan asked, and this time you couldn't hold back your laugh.
As you launched into an explanation of Weber's theories, stumbling only slightly over the terms, you couldn't help but notice how Cregan had angled himself slightly toward you, his shoulder just barely brushing yours as he added clarifying points to your explanation. And if Sara and Jace kept exchanging those irritating knowing looks, well, you decided to ignore them.
Even if you had a sneaking suspicion they might be right about... whatever it was they thought they were seeing.
The study session had stretched into hours, and despite the caffeine you'd consumed, your brain had begun to feel like mush. The terms Sara was repeating, again and again, had started to blur together, an endless loop of rationality and theory that felt more like noise than knowledge. You let your eyes drift shut for a moment, only to open them again when Jace shifted beside you, his legs still sprawled lazily across your lap.
He was mindlessly tracing patterns on the edge of his notebook, his gaze elsewhere, his usual energy faded into something more comfortable. His quiet presence was oddly soothing, though you weren’t sure if it was the weight of his legs or the fact that everything about him seemed to take on a hazy calm in this late hour. You rubbed your temples, trying to clear the fog.
Cregan, who had been quietly following the discussion, had noticed the slight slump of your shoulders, the way your attention drifted. He shifted in his seat across from you, catching your tired gaze.
“How about we take a break?” he suggested, his voice steady but with a hint of warmth you didn’t expect. “Maybe... get some food? Clear our heads a bit?”
Sara perked up at the mention of food, but Jace, still lounging with his legs across your lap, groaned dramatically. “Food sounds like a good idea,” he agreed, though the way he shifted only slightly suggested he wasn’t keen on moving.
“You’re so lazy,” Sara teased him, but it was clear she was ready to indulge.
Cregan shot you an amused look as he leaned forward, hands on his knees. “I’ll order, if you guys want.”
Your stomach had been protesting the lack of proper meals for hours, the idea of food suddenly making your body feel much more alive. "Honestly, I’m starving," you admitted, leaning back into the couch and letting Jace’s legs settle heavier over yours, the comfortable weight of them anchoring you.
Cregan had already moved toward the phone, his tall form cutting through the space between the couch and the table with purposeful strides.
He’d barely looked at the screen when he muttered about getting “a little bit of everything”, a casual declaration that spoke volumes about his no-nonsense approach to food. You couldn’t help but appreciate the simplicity of it all; he’d just order it all. No one would be left hungry.
You had almost forgotten about Jace, whose legs were still comfortably sprawled across your lap. But now, as he shifted and poked at your side, you found his eyes focused on you, bright with mischief.
“Hey,” he said, the playful note in his voice unmistakable. “Can you come with me to get a glass of water?”
You blinked at him, incredulous. “The kitchen’s, like, five feet away,” you replied, gesturing toward the open space across the room. "You're a big boy. You can go on your own."
“I could really use your help."
You groaned, the weariness in your bones making it hard to argue. “You’re impossible,” you muttered under your breath, but already, you were pushing yourself off the couch, your hand lightly brushing against his legs as you stood. Jace’s grin widened as you walked toward the kitchen, clearly pleased with himself for getting you to move.
Behind you, Sara was still mumbling terms under her breath, her brother’s voice fading into the background as he handled the phone call. The steady murmur of the conversation didn’t even register in your mind; your focus was solely on Jace, who was trailing behind you with a slow, exaggerated shuffle.
As you entered the kitchen, you turned to face him, expecting him to move toward the cabinet or the tap for a glass. But instead, he simply stood there, looking around aimlessly, as if the very task of getting water had suddenly become an unsolvable puzzle.
You sighed, crossing your arms. “Well? What’s the holdup?”
He glanced back at you, his expression one of mock innocence.
"So..." Jace dragged out the word, leaning against the counter with exaggerated casualness. "You and Cregan..."
"Were studying," you finished flatly, already knowing where this was going. "Like we're supposed to be doing."
"Right, right. Just studying." He wiggled his eyebrows. "For two whole hours. Alone. And you didn't think about doing... anything else?"
Heat crept up your neck. "Jace!"
"What?" He held up his hands defensively, but his grin remained firmly in place. "I'm just saying, two people, empty apartment, plenty of time..."
"To study Weber's theories of social organization," you cut in, though you could feel your face burning. "Which is exactly what we did."
"Boring," he sang under his breath, then dodged the dish towel you threw at him. "Come on, you can't tell me you weren't even a little tempted to, I don't know, actually talk to him? About something other than dead sociologists?"
You busied yourself getting a glass from the cabinet, even though Jace still hadn't asked for water. "Why would I? He barely tolerates me as it is."
"What?" Jace's playful demeanor shifted into genuine confusion. "What are you talking about?"
"Oh, come on," you sighed, setting the glass down maybe a bit too forcefully. "This is literally the most he's ever spoken to me, and it's only because Sara forced him into this study group thing. He probably thinks I'm an idiot with my rainbow notes and constant questions."
Jace stared at you for a long moment, then burst out laughing. "Oh my god, you're actually serious."
"Keep your voice down!" you hissed, glancing toward the living room where you could still hear Cregan on the phone with the takeout place.
"Sorry, sorry," Jace wheezed, not looking sorry at all. "It's just... you think he finds you uninteresting? You?"
"Have you not noticed how he barely speaks to me? How he's always perfectly polite but never actually..." you waved your hands vaguely, "engages? Meanwhile, he talks to you and Sara like it's the easiest thing in the world."
"Because we've known him forever," Jace said, like it was obvious. "Trust me, he was way worse with us at first. It took me months to get more than three words out of him when we first met."
"That's different," you insisted, though something uncertain flickered in your chest. "You're his best friend, and Sara's his sister."
"And you're..." Jace trailed off, that irritating knowing look back on his face.
"His unwilling study partner," you finished. "Who he's stuck with because you and Sara keep abandoning us."
"Speaking of which," he grinned, "notice how he hasn't complained about that? Not even once?"
You opened your mouth to argue, then closed it again. Come to think of it, Cregan hadn't seemed particularly bothered by Sara and Jace's constant absences. If anything, he'd been... well, you weren't sure what he'd been, but 'annoyed' definitely wasn't it.
"That doesn't mean anything," you said finally, but your voice lacked conviction.
"Sure it doesn't." Jace pushed off from the counter, that insufferable grin still in place. "Just like it doesn't mean anything that he keeps looking over here right now, probably wondering what we're talking about."
"He is not–" you started to say, but when you glanced toward the living room, you caught Cregan quickly looking away, his phone call apparently finished. Something fluttered in your stomach.
"Told you," Jace sang quietly. Then his voice dropped lower, more serious. "Look, I know Cregan. He's... he's testing the waters. Always has been, with you."
You frowned, fidgeting with the empty glass. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"You know what's funny?" Jace leaned in conspiratorially, a small smile playing at his lips. "The first time you came over to hang out with me and Sara, like what, two years go? He came home, saw you sitting on the couch, and later told Sara you were really pretty." He paused, watching your reaction. "Never mentioned it again, of course. Classic Cregan. But I bet he still thinks so."
Your face felt like it was on fire. "You're making that up."
"Am I?" Jace raised an eyebrow. "Sara was so excited about it, she called me immediately. But then he just... clammed up. Wouldn't talk about you at all. Which, by the way, is exactly what he does when he's trying really hard not to show interest in something."
"That's..." you struggled to find words, your mind stuck on the idea that Cregan had ever thought about you that way. "That was years ago. He's barely spoken to me since then."
"Yeah, because he's an idiot who overthinks everything," Jace rolled his eyes. "Trust me, if he actually found you uninteresting, he definitely wouldn't have cleaned the entire apartment just because you were coming over to study."
You opened your mouth to argue, then closed it again as you remembered how suspiciously tidy the living room had been. "He said he just tidied up a bit."
"A bit?" Jace snorted. "He stress-cleaned for like two hours this morning. I found him organizing the spice rack alphabetically. We don't even cook!"
From the living room, you heard Cregan's voice: "Food's on the way. Everything okay in there?"
"Fine!" you called back, your voice higher than usual. "Just... getting Jace his water."
"Right," Jace muttered, smirking. "Just... think about it, okay? And maybe cut him some slack."
You grabbed the glass you'd taken out, filled it quickly, trying to process everything Jace had just told you. When you handed it to him back in the living room, he just smirked and set it aside without taking a single sip.
As you settled back onto the couch, you couldn't help but glance at Cregan. He was looking down at his phone, but there was a slight flush to his cheeks that hadn't been there before. You wondered if he'd heard any of your conversation, if he had any idea that Jace had just upended everything you thought you knew about how he saw you.
When he looked up and caught your eye, offering that small, almost shy smile, you felt your heart skip. Maybe Jace was right. Maybe you'd been reading this all wrong.
Halfway through your dinner, the room had settled into a comfortable sprawl. Shoes had been kicked off long ago, the air warm with the scent of food and the quiet hum of the television as Jace scrolled through endless movie options. Sara was curled up on the oversized bean bag Jace had dragged out from his (not so dirty) room, cross-legged and picking at her food between halfhearted comments about his choices.
You had swapped your stiff button-up for one of Jace’s shirts, soft and worn, draping over your frame as you lounged against the armrest of the couch, knees pulled up. Jace sat on the floor beside you, absentmindedly leaning into the space near your legs as he continued his aimless search.
"How about The Matrix?" Jace called out from his spot on the floor, scrolling endlessly through Netflix as he had been for the past ten minutes.
"No," Cregan replied without looking up from his food.
"Lord of the Rings?"
"We're not starting a three-hour movie at this time of night."
"Fine. Ocean's Eleven?"
"No."
You pushed your noodles around with your chopsticks, barely registering their back-and-forth. Your mind was stuck in a loop, replaying your conversation with Jace in the kitchen. The food in your stomach felt heavy, but you weren't sure if it was from eating too quickly or from the weight of this new information that you had no idea what to do with.
He'd found you pretty. Two years ago, maybe, but still. Cregan Stark, who always seemed so perfectly put together, so distant, had actually noticed you before you'd even properly met. And what were you supposed to do with that knowledge? It's not like you could just bring it up casually over takeout. 'Hey, heard you thought I was pretty ages ago, still think so?'
You snuck a glance at him from the corner of your eye. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, his takeout container balanced carefully on his knee as he systematically shot down every one of Jace's movie suggestions. The sleeves of his sweater were pushed up to his elbows, and you noticed how his forearms tensed slightly every time he reached for his drink. It really didn't help that he was unfairly attractive, all quiet intensity and careful movements.
"Indiana Jones?" Jace's voice cut through your thoughts.
"No."
"You're impossible," Jace groaned.
Sara caught your eye from across the room and smiled knowingly, making you wonder just how obvious your staring had been. What were they playing at, really?
You'd lost count of how many times you'd asked Sara if her brother actually liked you – as a person, as a friend, as anything. "Of course he likes you!" she'd always insist. "He's just quiet at first!" But you'd never quite believed her, not when he seemed so much more animated with everyone else.
But now... now Jace had thrown everything into question. If what he said was true, if Cregan really had been interested enough to comment on you that first time... The thought made your stomach flip in a way that had nothing to do with the food.
"Inception?" Jace tried again.
"Jace."
"What? It's perfect! It's about complex theories and stuff. Very educational."
You caught yourself smiling at their bickering, only to look up and find Cregan watching you with that same unreadable expression. He quickly looked back to his food.
You felt heat creeping up your neck. What did they expect you to do? Make the first move? You barely knew him, really knew him, beyond his perfect notes and quiet presence.
"Fast and Furious?" Jace's voice broke through your thoughts again.
"I'm going to throw something at you," Cregan warned, but there was no real heat in his voice.
You bit back a smile, trying to focus on your food instead of the way Cregan's shoulder brushed against your leg when he reached for the soy sauce. Friends, you told yourself firmly. If anything was going to change, it would have to start there. But as you watched him hide another smile behind his hand at Jace's increasingly ridiculous movie suggestions, you couldn't help but wonder if that would be enough.
What had Jace expected you to do with that information? He found you pretty. The words echoed in your mind, each repetition adding weight. What were you supposed to do with that? Did Jace and Sara want you to do something with it? Ask Cregan out? Were they trying to set you up? Or was the plan simply to get you to talk to him more, be friends, maybe?
It made sense, right? Friends first. You weren’t exactly convinced when Sara told you time and again that Cregan was just quiet at first. But now, after talking to Jace, the whole thing felt confusing. Were you reading into things? Maybe it was easier to believe Cregan just didn’t like you at all during these past two years, rather than accept that he hadn’t been comfortable enough to show it.
He was so attractive. Very attractive. There was no denying it. You could feel the heat creeping up your neck as you watched him out of the corner of your eye. His quiet confidence, the way he carried himself… It made your stomach flutter in a way you couldn't quite explain.
You saw him shift on the couch, making himself more comfortable. He set down his now-empty takeout container and leaned back, looking like he had no interest in eating anymore.
Still, he kept rejecting every single one of Jace’s movie suggestions, each one more absurd than the last. Sara, sensing the impasse, jumped in with her usual exasperated tone, urging them to just pick something already.
You caught Cregan’s profile as he reclined, one hand casually brushing his hair back, and the heat to your face increased. Your knees were drawn up to your chest, hoping they’d hide the way your cheeks had flushed. Your gaze flickered between the two of them, trying not to be too obvious as you studied him.
He didn’t seem to notice, or if he did, he didn’t acknowledge it.
***
The next few days passed in a blur of highlighted notes and carefully maintained distance. Where there had been moments of warmth during that first evening in Cregan's apartment, now there was only polite efficiency. He'd explain concepts clearly when asked, his voice steady and professional, but gone were the small smiles, the quiet jokes, the moments where he seemed to let his guard down.
You tried to match his businesslike approach, taking careful notes and keeping your questions relevant and concise. But the silence between explanations felt heavy, loaded with things unsaid. You couldn't help but wonder if you'd imagined the connection from before, if Jace had been wrong about everything.
"So," Sara announced one afternoon, dropping into her usual seat at the library with suspicious enthusiasm. "I've been thinking."
"Dangerous," you muttered, not looking up from your notes.
"About our study strategy," she continued, ignoring your comment. "I think we should try something new."
That made you look up. Cregan, who had been quietly reviewing his own notes across the table, paused too, his pen hovering over the page.
"What kind of something?" you asked warily.
"Well," Sara drew out the word, exchanging a quick glance with Jace. "I was thinking we might be more effective if we split into pairs. You know, for more focused discussion."
You felt your stomach drop. "Pairs?"
"Mmhmm," she nodded, trying and failing to look casual. "Like, maybe Jace and I could work on the historical context stuff, and you two could focus on the theoretical frameworks?"
"That... doesn't make any sense," you said slowly. "You're better at theory than Jace is."
"Hey!" Jace protested, then paused. "No, wait, that's fair."
"It's not about who's better at what," Sara insisted. "It's about... different learning styles. Fresh perspectives. Right, Cregan?"
Cregan looked up from his notes, his expression carefully neutral. "If you think it would help," he said evenly, and something in your chest tightened at his apparent indifference.
"Great!" Sara beamed, already gathering her things. "Then it's settled. Jace and I will go to the coffee shop downstairs, and you two can stay here."
"Wait, now?" you asked, but they were already standing.
"No time like the present!" Jace grinned, shouldering his bag. "Have fun with..." he gestured vaguely at the textbooks, "all that."
They were gone before you could protest further, leaving you alone with Cregan and the uncomfortable silence that seemed to follow you lately. You stared at your notes, the highlighted words blurring together as you tried to think of something to say.
"We don't have to do this," Cregan said quietly, making you look up. "If you'd rather study alone–"
"No!" you said quickly, then winced at how eager it sounded. "I mean, no, it's fine. Unless you'd rather..."
"It's fine," he echoed, but you couldn't read his expression.
The silence stretched between you, broken only by the soft sound of pages turning and pens scratching against paper. You tried to focus on your reading, but your mind kept drifting to that evening in his apartment, to Jace's words in the kitchen. Had you really misread everything so badly?
"That diagram," Cregan's voice startled you out of your thoughts. "It's wrong."
You looked down at the messy chart you'd been attempting to draw. "Oh. Right. Sorry, I'm a bit..." you trailed off, not sure how to finish that sentence.
He hesitated, then shifted his chair closer, not quite touching but near enough that you could smell his cologne. "Here," he said softly, reaching for your pen. "May I?"
You nodded, trying to ignore how your heart sped up as his fingers brushed yours when he took the pen. He began redrawing the diagram, his lines neat and precise where yours had been chaotic.
"The relationship between these concepts," he explained, his voice low and close to your ear, "it's more circular than linear. See?"
You nodded again, though you were having trouble focusing on the diagram when he was this close, when you could see the way his eyelashes cast shadows on his cheeks as he looked down at the page.
"Does that make sense?" he asked, glancing at you, and for a moment, you caught something in his expression – uncertainty, maybe, or something else you couldn't quite name.
"Yeah," you managed, even as your mind raced with questions that had nothing to do with social theory. "Thanks."
He nodded, starting to pull back, but then he paused. "I'm not..." he began, then stopped, frowning slightly. "I'm not very good at this."
"The diagram looks pretty good to me," you said, trying for lightness.
"Not that," he said quietly, still frowning at the page. "This. Studying with... people."
"Oh." You weren't sure what to say to that. "You seem pretty good at it to me. Very... efficient."
He made a sound that might have been a laugh, but it held no humor. "Efficient," he repeated, like the word tasted bitter. "Right."
Before you could ask what he meant by that, he was already pulling away, the careful distance settling back into place like a wall between you. You watched as he returned to his own notes, his posture rigid, and wondered if you'd ever figure out how to bridge that gap.
Or if he even wanted you to try.
The afternoon light shifted through the library windows, casting long shadows across your textbooks. You'd been staring at the same paragraph for what felt like hours, the words swimming before your eyes. Cregan hadn't spoken since his attempt at fixing your diagram, and the silence was starting to feel suffocating.
"Maybe we should take a break," you suggested finally, your voice sounding too loud in the quiet space.
Cregan looked up, seeming almost startled, as if he'd forgotten you were there. "Oh. Yes, if you want."
You stretched, trying to work out the stiffness in your shoulders. "I think my brain is officially full. If I try to memorize one more theory, it might actually explode."
Something flickered across his face – amusement, maybe? – before it disappeared behind his usual mask of neutrality.
The next week, you arrived at the library to find a coffee cup waiting at your usual spot. Steam curled from the lid, and when you picked it up, the scent of vanilla and caramel made your stomach flutter.
"Is this…” you started, looking up to find Cregan already seated, seemingly absorbed in his textbook.
"You always order the same thing," he said without looking up, but you caught the slight upturn at the corner of his mouth.
You took a sip – perfect. Just the right amount of sweetness, exactly how you liked it. "You noticed?"
He shrugged, but there was a faint pink tinge to his ears. "It's not complicated."
But it was, wasn't it? It was complicated in all the ways that mattered – in the way he must have arrived early to get it, in the way he'd paid attention to your order all those times at the coffee shop, in the way this small gesture made your heart skip.
It became a routine after that. Every session, a coffee would be waiting, and every time you'd try not to read too much into it. But you couldn't help noticing how he'd glance at you when you took that first sip, as if checking to make sure it was right.
The silences changed too. Where they'd once been heavy with uncertainty, they grew comfortable, like a shared secret. You found yourself testing the waters, making quiet comments just to see if you could coax out one of his rare smiles.
"Weber probably needed a coffee this strong to write all this," you muttered one afternoon, earning a soft huff of amusement from across the table.
"Two sugars might have improved his view on bureaucracy," he replied, so deadpan that it took you a moment to realize he was joking back.
Weeks passed, and you fell into an easy rhythm. You learned to read the subtle shifts in his expression – the slight furrow between his brows when he was deep in thought, the way his eyes would soften when you finally understood a difficult concept.
He started anticipating your questions, sliding his perfectly organized notes toward you before you could even ask. Sometimes his fingers would brush yours in the exchange, and you'd both pretend not to notice the lingering warmth.
"Here," he'd say quietly, already pointing to the relevant section. "This connects to what you were asking about earlier."
You found yourself watching him between assignments, studying the way he'd absently run a hand through his hair when concentrating, how he'd tap his pen against his notebook in a specific rhythm when working through a complex idea. The way his shoulders would relax, just slightly, when you settled into your seat beside him.
One afternoon, you caught him watching you back. He didn't look away immediately like he used to, instead holding your gaze for a moment longer than necessary. Something warm unfurled in your chest at the sight.
"What?" you asked softly, not wanting to break whatever spell had fallen over the moment.
"Nothing," he said, but his voice had that gentle quality it got sometimes, the one that made you want to lean in closer. "Just... thinking."
"About Weber?" you teased, trying to ignore how your pulse quickened when his lips curved into a small smile.
"Not exactly."
He didn't elaborate, turning back to his notes, but something had shifted. The space between you felt charged, like the air before a storm. You found yourself hyperaware of every movement – the way his arm would brush yours when he reached for his coffee, how his knee would sometimes rest against yours under the table.
You started bringing him coffee too, placing it beside his notebook without comment. The first time you did, he stared at it for a long moment before looking up at you with an expression that made your breath catch.
"Black, two sugars," you said, echoing his words from weeks ago. "You always order the same thing."
His smile then was different – softer, more open than you'd ever seen. "Thank you," he said quietly, and you knew he meant for more than just the coffee.
The routine of studying together became something you looked forward to, not just for the help with coursework but for these small moments of connection. The way he'd lean in close to explain a concept, his voice low and just for you. How he'd sometimes forget himself and laugh at your terrible jokes, the sound warming you from the inside out.
And if you spent more time watching the way his hands moved across the page than actually reading, well... that was just part of the learning process, right?
The evening air had turned cool by the time you both packed up your things. The library had emptied out, leaving just the quiet murmur of the city outside to fill the space. You rubbed your eyes, stifling a yawn as you pushed your textbooks into your bag. The long study session had worn you out more than you'd expected, but you'd also made real progress. You couldn't remember the last time you'd felt so focused.
Cregan had gathered his things too, and for a moment, he just stood there, looking at you with that quiet intensity you had grown used to over the past weeks. Without a word, he slid his jacket from the back of his chair and held it out toward you.
"You look cold," he muttered, his voice low and a little rough, like he wasn't used to saying things like that. "Just for a bit. You can give it back tomorrow."
You glanced up at him, momentarily taken aback by the offer. But the warmth of the jacket, its familiar scent of pine and something crisp, was inviting. You hadn't realized how much the chill had crept into the air until now.
"Thanks," you said quietly, slipping your arms into the sleeves. The soft fabric immediately enveloped you, and you couldn’t help but notice how it smelled like him – comforting and calming, but also... a little more than that.
The walk back to your place was peaceful. The streets were mostly empty, the glow from the streetlights casting long shadows on the pavement. The night felt still, like the world had paused just for you two.
"How are you feeling about everything?" Cregan asked, his voice breaking the silence as you walked side by side. There was no urgency in his tone, just a quiet curiosity, like he genuinely wanted to know.
You considered the question for a moment, taking in the city around you. It wasn’t just the study sessions that had shifted over the past few weeks, it was the way things felt between you both. The casual touches. The quiet moments. The way he noticed things about you before you even said anything.
"It's... been good," you said finally, your voice softer than usual. "Better than I expected."
He nodded, his eyes on the ground ahead. "I’m glad."
For a while, there was only the sound of your footsteps echoing in the quiet night. You tried not to focus too much on the fact that his jacket felt like a shield around you, or how it made your chest feel fuller with every step.
Then, almost as if he couldn’t stop himself, Cregan glanced at you again. His gaze lingered just a moment too long, before he quickly looked away, but not before you saw the faint flush creeping up his neck.
"You're not–" he started, then trailed off, shaking his head slightly like he'd lost the thread of his thought.
"Not what?" you prompted, a playful edge to your voice, hoping to keep things light.
He hesitated again, but then spoke, his voice quieter now. "Not… sick of me yet?"
You stopped in your tracks for a moment, staring up at him. But before you could respond, he let out a soft chuckle, clearly trying to brush it off. "Never mind. That sounded dumb."
"No," you said quickly, stepping a little closer to him. "No, it didn’t."
He stopped walking too, his eyes catching yours. There was a moment, just a fleeting second, where you both stood there, in the middle of the empty street, feeling the weight of something unspoken between you.
"I don't think I could get sick of you," you added softly, your words surprising both of you.
He gave you a small, surprised smile, his lips barely curling upward, but there was warmth in his expression, something that had been absent the first time you'd met him. "Good to know.”
"What do you mean by that?" you asked, tugging his jacket closer around you. The night air had grown cooler, but that wasn't the only reason you felt a slight shiver run through you.
Cregan ran a hand through his hair, a gesture you'd come to recognize as a sign of nervousness. "It's just... you're different with them. With Jace and Sara." He paused, choosing his words carefully. "More yourself, I guess. More... open."
"Oh." You let out a soft laugh, though it came out a bit shakier than intended. "That's because they're easy to talk to. You're..." You trailed off, suddenly very aware of how close you were standing.
"I'm what?" His voice was quiet, curious.
You took a deep breath, watching your shoes scuff against the pavement. "Intimidating," you admitted finally. "You're so... I mean, you understand everything instantly in class, and your notes are always perfect, and sometimes I feel like I'm just..." You gestured vaguely with one hand. "Fumbling around in the dark while you've got it all figured out."
He was quiet for so long that you had to look up at him. When you did, you found him staring at you with an expression you couldn't quite read – something between surprise and... was that amusement?
"You think I'm intimidating?" He let out a low laugh, the sound warming the cool night air. "That's... that's actually kind of funny."
"Why is that funny?"
"Because I've spent the last few weeks trying to figure out how to talk to you without sounding like an idiot." He shook his head, a self-deprecating smile playing at his lips. "You're always so quick with words, always know exactly what to say to make everyone laugh. And I'm..."
"Brilliant?" you offered, then immediately felt your cheeks warm.
His eyes snapped to yours, that hint of pink returning to his ears. "I'm really not," he said softly. "I just... study a lot. It's easier than..." He gestured between you two. "This."
"This?"
"Talking. Being... normal." He let out a breath that might have been another laugh. "Ask Jace, I'm terrible at it. Why do you think he does most of the talking when we're together?"
You couldn't help but smile at that. "I always thought you just preferred talking to him."
"I prefer..." he started, then stopped himself, looking away. "It's not that. I just... don't always know what to say. Especially around..." His voice got quieter. "Around you."
The admission hung in the air between you, making your heart beat a little faster. You were suddenly very aware of how alone you were on the street, how the streetlights cast soft shadows across his face, how his jacket still wrapped around you felt like a embrace.
"Well," you said, trying to keep your voice light despite the flutter in your stomach, "you seem to be doing okay right now."
He looked back at you, and this time his smile was different – slower, warmer. "Yeah," he said softly. "I guess I am."
You walked in comfortable silence for a few more steps before you couldn't help adding, "Though I still think you're brilliant. Even if you try to deny it."
He ducked his head, but not before you caught his smile widening. "And I still think you're easier to talk to than you realize."
"I don't know about that," you said, laughing softly. "The other day I tried to tell my neighbor her new haircut looked nice and somehow ended up in a twenty-minute conversation about her cat's dietary restrictions."
Cregan's quiet laugh made your chest feel warm. "How does that even happen?"
"I wish I knew. One minute I was complimenting her bangs, the next I knew everything about Mr. Whiskers' gluten sensitivity." You shook your head, remembering the increasingly awkward interaction. "I still can't look her in the eye."
His shoulder brushed against yours as he walked, and you realized you'd gradually drifted closer together. The street was wide enough for several people to walk side by side, yet here you were, barely inches apart. You thought about moving over, giving him more space, but then his pinky finger grazed your hand, and the thought evaporated.
"At least you talk to your neighbors," he said, his voice softer now. "I've lived in my apartment for eight months, and I still don't know their names. The lady next door just calls me 'dear' and leaves cookies at my doorstep sometimes."
"Free cookies sound nice," you said, very aware of how his hand kept brushing against yours with each step.
"They are. Though I'm slightly worried she thinks I'm not eating enough. The notes she leaves keep getting more concerned." His lips twitched. "Last week she wrote 'growing boys need their strength' on the container. I'm twenty-two."
You couldn't help but laugh at that, the sound echoing slightly in the quiet street. "That's adorable. She's adopted you."
"Yeah, well..." He ran his free hand through his hair, but you caught his smile. "Sara says I give off 'needs to be taken care of' energy."
"Do you?" The words slipped out before you could stop them, and you felt your cheeks warm.
He glanced at you then, and something in his expression made your breath catch. "I don't know. Do I?"
Your fingers brushed again, and this time, neither of you pulled away immediately. The contact was feather-light, barely there, but it sent tingles up your arm. You were about to respond when you realized you'd reached your building.
"This is me," you said reluctantly, stopping at the bottom of the steps. The porch light cast a warm glow around you both, and you couldn't help but notice how it caught in his eyes, making them look softer than usual.
"Right," he said, but didn't move away. His pinky was still barely touching yours, and you wondered if he could feel how your pulse had picked up. "I should..."
"Yeah," you agreed, though neither of you moved.
The night felt suspended around you, like time had slowed down just for this moment. A car passed in the distance, its headlights briefly illuminating his face, and you caught something in his expression that made your heart skip – a warmth, a hesitation, maybe even a hint of regret that the walk was over.
***
Days melted into weeks, and slowly, piece by piece, you began collecting little truths about Cregan Stark.
You learned that he always showed up exactly seven minutes early to everything – not five, not ten, but seven. When you teased him about it, he'd muttered something about traffic patterns and optimal timing that made you hide your smile behind your coffee cup.
You discovered that when he was deep in thought, he'd tap his fingers against the table in a specific rhythm – index, middle, ring, pause, repeat. Sometimes you'd catch yourself counting the beats, wondering what was running through his mind.
The way his jaw would clench slightly when he was stressed but trying not to show it. How he'd roll his shoulders back when he was tired, a gesture so subtle you wouldn't have noticed if you hadn't spent so many hours sitting beside him. The soft exhale he'd make when he finally solved a problem that had been bothering him.
There were other things too – things that made your heart do odd little flips in your chest. Like how he'd lean in close when explaining something, his voice dropping to almost a whisper even though you were the only ones there. His fingers would brush against yours as he pointed something out, lingering just a moment too long to be accidental. In those moments, time seemed to slow down, and you'd find yourself holding your breath, wondering if he could feel the electricity crackling between you.
You learned that he had a dry sense of humor that came out in unexpected moments. That he could deliver the most ridiculous puns with a completely straight face, only the slight crinkle around his eyes giving him away. That he'd fight a smile when you caught on, but his eyes would dance with amusement.
Some days, you'd catch him watching you when he thought you weren't looking. His gaze would be soft, contemplative, making your skin tingle with awareness. But every time you'd look up, he'd quickly turn away, that familiar pink tinge creeping up his ears.
You noticed how his whole demeanor would shift when you walked in, subtle but unmistakable – his shoulders would relax, his expression would soften, and sometimes, if you were lucky, you'd catch the ghost of a smile playing at his lips before he could hide it.
There were moments when he'd get so caught up in explaining something he was passionate about, his usual reserve would fall away completely. His hands would move animatedly, his eyes would light up, and you'd find yourself more fascinated by his enthusiasm than whatever he was actually talking about.
And sometimes, in quiet moments when the library was nearly empty and the evening light was turning golden, he'd look at you in a way that made your breath catch. Like you were a puzzle he was trying to solve, or maybe something he wanted to memorize. In those moments, the thought would creep in, unbidden but persistent – maybe, just maybe, he felt this too. This growing warmth, this magnetic pull, this feeling that had been building between you like a slow-burning flame.
But then he'd look away, or someone would walk by, or reality would intrude in some other way, and you'd tell yourself you were reading too much into things. That you were seeing what you wanted to see in those lingering touches and soft glances.
Still, you couldn't help but notice how he'd position himself slightly closer to you each day, how his hand would find excuses to brush against yours, how his voice would take on that gentle quality that seemed reserved just for you. And in those moments, hope would flutter in your chest, persistent and warm, refusing to be ignored.
You gathered these observations like precious stones, collecting them carefully, turning them over in your mind when you were alone. Each one was a piece of him, freely given but carefully treasured. And if sometimes you caught yourself daydreaming about what it might mean – well, that was just another secret to keep, tucked away with all the others.
"Wait, wait–" you said through barely contained laughter, "you actually convinced Jace that pigeons were government spies?"
Cregan's eyes crinkled at the corners as he tried to maintain his serious expression. "He spent three weeks avoiding eye contact with every pigeon he saw. Sara finally had to tell him the truth because he kept diving into bushes whenever they flew overhead."
You buried your face in your hands, shoulders shaking with laughter. The library's quiet atmosphere was long forgotten, your books pushed aside in favor of sharing stories. "That's terrible. You're terrible."
"He deserved it," Cregan said, but his voice was warm with affection. "He'd just spent a month convincing me that my phone was automatically translating everything into English and I was actually speaking fluent Portuguese without realizing it."
"How did he even–"
"Don't ask. It involved a very elaborate setup with his cousin who actually speaks Portuguese." He shook his head, but his smile was fond. "Jace can be... creative when he commits to something."
You propped your chin on your hand, studying him. These moments had become more frequent lately – times when his guard would drop completely, and you'd get to see the playful side of him that most people missed. "You three must have had an interesting childhood."
"Interesting is one word for it." His expression softened with nostalgia. "Sara used to organize these elaborate treasure hunts around the house. She'd spend hours making these ridiculous clues, and then get mad when Jace and I solved them too quickly." He paused, then added quietly, "It helped, you know. When I first moved in with Dad and Sara's mom. Made it feel less..."
"Overwhelming?" you offered gently when he trailed off.
He nodded, absently fiddling with his pen. "Yeah. They just... included me. No questions asked. Even when I was this awkward kid who barely talked and spent most of his time reading in corners."
"Some things never change," you teased, nudging his foot under the table.
His answering smile was warm enough to make your heart skip. "I talk more now."
"True. Now you use whole sentences instead of just grunting."
"I never grunted," he protested, but his eyes were dancing with amusement.
"Oh really? What about that first week when I asked to borrow your notes? Pretty sure all I got was 'hmph' and a nod."
He had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. "That wasn't... I was just..."
"Just what?"
"Nervous," he admitted quietly, meeting your eyes. "You make me nervous sometimes."
The confession hung in the air between you, making your pulse quicken. Before you could respond, a notification chimed on your phone – Sara asking if you wanted to grab dinner later.
"Oh," you said, glancing at the time. "We've been here for four hours."
"Really?" Cregan looked genuinely surprised, like he hadn't noticed the time slipping away. "It doesn't feel that long."
"Time flies when you're sharing embarrassing stories about Jace," you said lightly, trying to ease back from the moment of vulnerability.
He laughed softly, but his eyes stayed on you, warm and intent. "Yeah," he agreed. "Must be that."
As you both started gathering your things, you couldn't help but marvel at how different these sessions felt now. The awkward silences had been replaced by comfortable conversation, shy glances had given way to shared jokes and easy laughter. Somehow, without you really noticing, Cregan Stark had become more than just your study partner or Sara's quiet brother.
He'd become your friend.
And if sometimes, in moments like earlier when he'd admitted to being nervous around you, you felt something flutter in your chest that felt bigger than friendship – well, that was probably just your imagination.
Probably.
***
When you arrived at Cregan's apartment that afternoon, your bag heavy with books, you found him already standing in the doorway with an oddly hopeful expression.
"Before you take those out," he said, nodding at your bag, "I was thinking..." He paused, running a hand through his hair in that way that always meant he was nervous about something. "Maybe we could watch a film instead? Just... take a break?"
The suggestion surprised you – Cregan suggesting something other than studying was rare enough to make you wonder if you'd heard him correctly. But there was something almost vulnerable in the way he was looking at you, like he half-expected you to say no.
"Yeah," you said, trying not to sound too eager. "Yeah, that sounds nice."
The relief that crossed his face made your heart flutter. His apartment was exactly what you'd expected – minimalist but comfortable, with books arranged neatly on shelves and a few framed photographs on the walls. The familiar scent of pine and something crisp – the same scent from his jacket that night – filled the space.
"Make yourself comfortable," he said, gesturing to the couch while he moved to the kitchen. "Do you want anything to drink?"
You settled onto the couch, tucking your legs under you. "Whatever you're having is fine."
He returned with two mugs of tea, setting them carefully on the coffee table. When he sat down beside you, he was close enough that your knees almost touched. The couch wasn't small – there was plenty of room for him to sit further away – but he didn't, and neither of you mentioned it.
"So," you said, wrapping your hands around the warm mug, "what are we watching?"
He reached for the remote, and you noticed how his other hand rested on the couch between you, his pinky just barely touching your knee. "I thought maybe..." He scrolled through options on the screen, but you caught how his eyes kept darting to you, gauging your reaction. "There's this old film I think you'd like."
You turned to face him, your shoulder pressing against the back of the couch. "Cregan Stark, are you about to make me watch an art house film?"
His lips twitched. "Maybe." Then, more quietly, "Is that okay?"
"Depends. Are you going to explain all the metaphors to me?" You were teasing, but your breath caught when he leaned in slightly, his eyes meeting yours.
"Only if you want me to," he murmured, reaching for the remote. His arm brushed against yours as he settled back, and you noticed he didn't move it away.
The film started playing, but you found yourself more aware of how close he was sitting, how your shoulders pressed together, how his fingers occasionally brushed against your knee when he gestured while explaining something about the cinematography.
Halfway through, you shifted position, and somehow ended up with your head resting against his shoulder. You felt him tense for a moment, then slowly relax, his cheek coming to rest against your hair.
"This okay?" you whispered, not wanting to break the moment.
His response was to tentatively wrap his arm around your shoulders, pulling you slightly closer. He grunted softly, a noncommittal sound that made you smile against his shoulder.
"Oh, are we back to the grunt-only communication?" you teased quietly, feeling his chest shake with silent laughter. "And here I thought we'd made such progress."
He made another grunt, this one clearly exaggerated, and you could hear the smile in it. Your own lips curved upward – you'd learned to read his different sounds over the past weeks, could tell the difference between his annoyed grunts and his amused ones. This one was definitely amused, with maybe a touch of nervousness underneath.
"Very articulate," you whispered, shifting slightly to get more comfortable against him. "Truly, your way with words continues to astound me."
His fingers twitched against your shoulder, and when he spoke, his voice was low and a bit rough. "Didn't want to say the wrong thing."
Something warm bloomed in your chest at his admission. "Since when do you say the wrong thing?"
He was quiet for a moment, his thumb absently tracing circles on your shoulder. "Around you? More often than you'd think."
You wanted to look up at him then, but you were afraid moving might break whatever spell had fallen over you both. Instead, you stayed where you were, feeling his heartbeat against your cheek, steady but just a little faster than normal.
On screen, the film continued playing, but neither of you seemed to be paying much attention anymore.
"I find that hard to believe," you murmured, finally gathering the courage to tilt your head up to look at him. "You always seem to know exactly what to say."
When your eyes met his, your breath caught in your throat. He was already looking down at you, his expression soft and open in a way you'd never seen before. The blue light from the TV played across his features, making his eyes look darker than usual.
"That's because," he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, "I spend about ten minutes planning every sentence before I say it to you."
You couldn't help but laugh softly at that. "Ten whole minutes? No wonder you're so quiet."
"Wouldn't want to mess it up." His eyes flickered down to your lips for just a moment before meeting your gaze again. The arm around your shoulders tightened slightly, drawing you impossibly closer.
"And what about now?" you asked, your heart thundering in your chest. "How long did you spend planning that one?"
He swallowed hard, and you watched the movement of his throat. "I didn't," he admitted.
You shifted slightly, turning more fully towards him. His other hand came up to brush a strand of hair from your face, his fingers lingering against your cheek. The touch sent shivers down your spine.
"Cregan," you breathed, not even sure what you were going to say next.
He leaned in slowly, giving you plenty of time to pull away. But you didn't want to pull away – you found yourself moving closer, your eyes starting to flutter closed, his breath mixing with yours.
The space between you and Cregan grew smaller. His fingers, warm and steady, traced the curve of your cheek, while his other hand settled at the small of your back, holding you in place as if afraid you might slip away.
Your own hand had found its way to his thigh, fingers curling slightly against the fabric of his sweatpants. You could feel the tension in him – the way his muscles tensed under your touch, the way his breath hitched ever so slightly when your fingertips pressed just a little firmer.
His nose brushed yours, the barest whisper of contact, and your lips parted on instinct, a quiet, breathless anticipation settling between you.
You could feel his hesitation, the last remnants of restraint flickering in his gaze. One more inch and–
The front door swung open with a loud thud.
You flinched, and Cregan jerked back as if burned, his grip on your waist loosening. The spell shattered in an instant.
From the hallway, Jace’s voice rang out, casual and utterly oblivious to the moment he had just ruined.
"Honey, I'm home!” he sang, “You would not believe the day I've had – oh.”
Jace stood in the doorway, keys dangling from his hand, a slow grin spreading across his face. "Well, well, well," he drawled, looking between you two with obvious delight. "What do we have here?"
"We're watching a film," Cregan said quickly, his voice slightly hoarse. You noticed his ears had turned that telltale pink again.
"Uh-huh," Jace nodded, not even trying to hide his smirk. "And how's the film?"
You realized with a start that neither of you had any idea what was happening on screen. You'd completely lost track of the plot about the same time Cregan's arm had wrapped around you.
"It's..." you started.
"Very artistic," Cregan finished lamely.
Jace's grin widened. "I'm sure it is." He kicked off his shoes and headed toward the kitchen, calling over his shoulder, "Don't let me interrupt your... artistic appreciation."
You caught Cregan's eye and had to bite your lip to keep from laughing at his mortified expression. The moment from before was broken, but something else had taken its place – a warm, giddy feeling that made it hard to stop smiling.
"So," you whispered, once Jace was safely in the kitchen. "Ten minutes to plan your next sentence?"
Cregan groaned quietly, letting his head fall back against the couch, but you could see him fighting a smile. "Might need twenty for this one."
Jace's not-so-subtle shuffling in the kitchen made the moment feel both ridiculous and charged. Cregan's arm was still draped around you, though now it felt more awkward than intimate.
"So," you said softly, trying to break the tension, "want to pretend we were actually watching the movie?"
He let out a quiet laugh. "I don't even know what we were watching."
You glanced at the screen. Some black and white scene was playing, characters moving in what seemed like slow motion. "Art house film," you whispered dramatically. "Very deep. Very meaningful."
"Very confusing," Cregan added, his voice low enough that only you could hear.
***
The café was bustling with the usual weekend crowd when you arrived, slightly out of breath from rushing. You spotted your friends immediately – Sara's laugh carrying over the general chatter, Jace gesturing animatedly about something. But as you approached, you noticed there were only four chairs at their small table, and they'd already claimed two of them.
The remaining two seats were snug together on the opposite side, and your stomach did a little flip when you saw Cregan already there, looking up at you with that quiet intensity you'd grown familiar with.
"You made it!" Sara beamed, but there was something suspiciously innocent about her expression. "We saved you a spot."
You hesitated for just a moment before sliding into the chair next to Cregan. The table was small enough that your elbows brushed as you settled in, and you caught a hint of that now-familiar pine scent. Without looking at you, he shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the back of your chair. The gesture was casual, almost absent-minded, but it made your pulse quicken.
"I already ordered your usual," he said quietly, just for you to hear.
"Thanks," you managed, trying to ignore how Sara and Jace exchanged knowing looks across the table.
Jace was mid-rant about Luke's latest culinary disaster. "I'm telling you, there are jars of fermenting liquid everywhere. Mom thinks he's going through some kind of wellness phase, but I'm pretty sure he's just trying to turn the kitchen into a science experiment."
Sara snorted into her latte. "Isn't that how all of Luke's phases start? Remember when he decided he was going to learn woodworking?"
"Three broken chairs and one very questionable coffee table later," Jace laughed.
You felt Cregan shift beside you, and his knee pressed a little more firmly against yours. You weren't sure if it was intentional or not, but you didn't move away. Instead, you found yourself leaning slightly into him, your shoulder just barely touching his.
"What about you?" Sara turned to you. "Any wild family stories?"
Before you could answer, Cregan's hand brushed against yours under the table. A light touch, almost accidental, but definitely deliberate. You saw the corner of his mouth twitch – he was listening, waiting for your response, but that small gesture said something else entirely.
"Nothing quite as exciting as kombucha brewing," you managed, hyper-aware of how close he was sitting. "Though my aunt did go through a phase of making her own cheese. Let's just say it didn't end well."
Jace burst out laughing. "Homemade cheese? That's a new one."
"Trust me," you said, "some experiments are best left to professionals."
Cregan's hand was still close to yours. His pinky finger had somehow found its way to rest against the side of your hand, a point of contact that seemed to send electricity through your entire body. You wondered if the others could see how close you were sitting, how every movement seemed charged with something unspoken.
"More coffee?" he murmured, so quietly that only you could hear.
You turned to look at him, catching his eye. There was something in his gaze – a warmth, a softness that made your breath catch. "Please," you whispered back.
Sara was still talking, Jace still gesturing, but in that moment, the rest of the café seemed to fade away. Just you, Cregan, and that small space between your hands that felt like it was holding entire universes.
His fingers brushed yours again. This time, you were certain it was definitely not an accident.
"Remember that time Professor Martinez spent fifteen minutes talking about his cat?" Jace was saying, but you were distracted by the way Cregan's fingers drummed a quiet pattern on the table, just inches from your hand.
"Mm-hmm," you responded, though you weren't entirely sure what you were agreeing to.
You reached for your coffee at the same time Cregan moved to adjust his sleeve, and your fingers collided. The touch was brief, but it sent a jolt through you that had nothing to do with caffeine. When you glanced up at him, his ears had that telltale pink tinge, but he didn't move away.
The café had grown cooler as the evening approached – someone must have opened a window – and you found yourself unconsciously leaning into the warmth of his presence beside you. His jacket still hung behind you, and occasionally you'd catch its scent, mixing with the coffee aroma in a way that made you feel slightly dizzy.
"Cold?" he asked softly, noticing your slight shiver.
Before you could respond, he was already reaching back, adjusting his jacket so it covered your shoulders better. His fingers brushed against your back for just a moment, and you had to remind yourself to breathe normally.
"Thanks," you whispered, and he nodded, his eyes lingering on yours for a moment longer than necessary.
Across the table, Sara was telling a story about her dance partner's disastrous attempt at a lift, but you were lost in the way the evening light from the window played across Cregan's profile, how his lips curved slightly when something amused him, the comfortable weight of his jacket around your shoulders.
You told yourself it was nothing. That the way your heart raced when his hand accidentally brushed yours again was just caffeine, that the warmth in your chest when he leaned closer to murmur a quiet comment about Jace's dramatic retelling of events was just the coffee. That the way he seemed to angle his body toward yours, creating a bubble that felt separate from the bustling café around you, was just coincidence.
It had to be nothing.
But then why did it feel like everything?
As the afternoon wore on, the café slowly emptied, the hum of conversation fading into the clatter of dishes and the quiet shuffle of the barista wiping down the counter. The golden light of the setting sun streamed through the large windows, painting long shadows across the worn wooden tables. Jace was the first to leave, pushing back his chair with a knowing smirk that made you want to kick him under the table. His gaze flickered between you and Cregan, his amusement clear as he slung his jacket over one shoulder.
"Have fun," he said lightly, though his tone held an edge of teasing that made your face warm.
Sara followed shortly after, grabbing her bag in a rush. She leaned in for a quick hug, her lips brushing your ear as she whispered, "Text me later," in a way that sounded suspiciously like a warning. Then, with a grin thrown over her shoulder, she was gone, the bells above the door jingling in her wake.
And then there were two.
For a moment, neither of you spoke. The café felt quieter, more intimate now, the air thick with something unspoken. Cregan's fingers tapped idly against the edge of his coffee cup, his sharp eyes fixed on you in that way that made your breath hitch. You could feel the weight of the moment settling between you, the tension coiling tight like a bowstring.
You cleared your throat, forcing a casual tone. "About your jacket," you started, knowing full well you were playing a game. "I think I accidentally kept it from the other night. It's still at my apartment."
Cregan raised an eyebrow, his expression skeptical, and you knew he wasn’t buying your innocent act. The truth was, you had definitely not forgotten his jacket. You had draped it around your shoulders before leaving, only to end up deciding not to bring it.
"Did you?" he asked, his voice low, amused.
You nodded, far too innocently. "Mhmm. Want to come get it?"
The corner of his mouth twitched, his lips tilting in the faintest ghost of a smile. "Might as well."
The walk back to your apartment felt shorter than it should have, the minutes slipping away as your steps fell into an easy rhythm. That now-familiar tension hung between you, humming beneath the surface, stretching with every unspoken thought. Your hands brushed – once, then again. Sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. The street lights flickered overhead, casting a warm glow onto the pavement, and in the quiet, you could feel his gaze on you, steady and unreadable. Watching. Waiting.
Anticipating.
"Sorry about the elevator," you said, pressing the stairwell door open. "It's been broken for weeks. Management promises they're fixing it, but..." You gestured uselessly.
Cregan just nodded, following you into the stairwell. The space was narrow, forcing you to climb single file at first, but he quickly moved to walk beside you, his shoulder occasionally brushing yours on the tight turns.
The first flight of stairs passed in comfortable silence. By the second floor, you were both slightly out of breath.
"Remind me why we're taking the stairs?" he asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.
"Character building," you quipped, stealing a glance at him. "Also, excellent cardiovascular exercise."
His laugh was soft, barely more than a breath. "Is that what this is?"
You were acutely aware of how close he was. On the narrow staircase, your arms kept brushing, his hand sometimes grazing the small of your back as you navigated the turns. The proximity felt charged, electric.
"Almost there," you said, trying to sound casual. Your heart was racing, and you weren't sure if it was from the stairs or from him.
The third-floor landing approached, and you could feel the weight of his gaze on you. Something hung in the air between you – anticipation, possibility, a breath held just a moment too long.
You unlocked the door and stepped inside, holding it open for him. He hesitated for the briefest moment, then followed, his footsteps slow, measured. The door clicked shut behind him, muffling the distant sounds of the street outside.
Inside, the space felt smaller somehow, the air charged with something electric. The scent of vanilla and old books filled the room, mingling with the lingering traces of his cologne still clinging to the jacket draped over the back of your couch. A single lamp cast a golden glow across the walls, softening the edges of the moment, but not the weight of it.
You turned, glancing up at him. “Make yourself at home,” you said, your voice steady, though your pulse wasn’t.
Cregan’s gaze flickered over the room before settling on you.
You reached into your closet and pulled out the perfectly folded jacket, holding it out to him with what you hoped was an innocent expression. "Here you go."
Cregan took it, something flickering in his eyes – a mix of surprise and... was that disappointment? He glanced toward the door, clearly preparing to leave, and you could almost see the moment he was about to say goodbye.
"Actually," you said quickly, "my TV's been acting up. Would you mind taking a look?"
He raised an eyebrow, a slow smile spreading across his face. It was the kind of smile that made your breath catch – part amusement, part something warmer. "Really?"
"Totally broken," you insisted, trying to look serious. "Completely non-functional."
"Completely?" Now he was definitely laughing, soft and low. "And here I thought we came up here just for the jacket."
You shrugged, feeling a blush creep up your neck. "Multi-purpose trip."
He followed you to the living room, still wearing that knowing smile. The TV sat quietly in the corner, looking suspiciously functional. But Cregan didn't call you out. Instead, he set the jacket down and moved toward the electronics, his fingers already reaching for the remote.
"Let me take a look," he said, his voice rich with barely contained amusement.
You bit back a smile. Busted – but not really.
Cregan crouched down in front of the TV, running his fingers along the back panel as he checked the cables. He moved with easy confidence, his broad shoulders flexing slightly under his shirt as he pulled one of the wires free.
“One of these might’ve come loose,” he murmured, more to himself than to you.
Before you could respond, he jerked his hand back slightly. A thin, red line beaded along his fingertip, stark against his skin. He barely reacted, just exhaling through his nose as he brought his hand up and – without hesitation – dragged his tongue over the small cut, as if it were nothing more than a papercut.
You, however, were already pushing off of the couch. “Oh my god, Cregan–”
He glanced up at you, brow raised. “It’s fine,” he said simply, his voice steady, like he hadn’t just sliced himself open on a rogue wire. “It’ll heal.”
“It’s bleeding.”
“Barely.”
“That’s not the point,” you huffed, already moving toward the kitchen. “Stay there, I have bandages.”
Cregan let out a quiet chuckle as you rummaged through a drawer, muttering something about stubborn men and their refusal to take basic medical care seriously. By the time you returned with a bandaid, he was still kneeling by the TV, watching you with open amusement.
“Hold out your hand,” you demanded.
“Is this really necessary?”
“Do not test me right now, Stark.”
His smirk deepened, but he obeyed, extending his hand toward you. His palm was warm, his fingers rough from years of use – evidence of someone who worked with his hands, who fought, who lived. You swallowed, focusing on carefully peeling the bandaid open before smoothing it over the cut.
“There,” you said, pressing down gently. “Now you won’t die of infection.”
Cregan flexed his fingers experimentally, shaking his head. “Didn’t realize a tiny scratch was life-threatening.”
You shot him a look. “Mock me all you want, but you’ll thank me when your finger doesn’t fall off.”
He laughed, low and easy, but his eyes lingered on you for a beat too long. And suddenly, the bandaid didn’t feel like the most important thing anymore.
From the bathroom, Cregan heard you call out, your voice taking on that slightly high-pitched tone he'd come to recognize as your embarrassed voice.
"Uh... so. The remote doesn't work because the battery is dead," you announced, sounding like you were hoping the floor might swallow you whole.
He emerged, drying his hands, to find you sitting on the couch looking like you'd been caught in an elaborate lie. Which, technically, you had been. The remote dangled from your hand, and you were avoiding direct eye contact.
"Shocking," he said drily, that hint of a smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Who could have seen that coming?"
"Shut up," you mumbled, but there was no real heat in it.
He stepped closer, taking the remote from your hand. "Batteries?"
You pointed to a drawer, still not looking directly at him. "Top one."
His laugh was soft, barely more than a breath. Cregan pulled open the drawer, retrieving a pair of fresh batteries with an ease that made you suspect he was enjoying this a little too much. He popped the old ones out and slid the new ones in, his movements unhurried, deliberate. When he handed the remote back to you, his fingers brushed against yours – just for a second, just long enough to send a flicker of warmth up your arm.
“Moment of truth,” he murmured, stepping back with an amused tilt of his head.
You aimed the remote at the TV, pressing the power button. The screen blinked to life instantly, the room filling with the soft glow of the home screen. You let out a quiet sigh, shoulders dropping in defeat.
Cregan crossed his arms, leaning against the back of the couch. “So, to recap: you invited me up here for a jacket you had no intention of giving back, faked a TV malfunction, and then made me bleed – all in the span of fifteen minutes.”
You huffed, tossing the remote onto the cushion beside you. “You make it sound so calculated.”
He smirked. “Wasn’t it?”
You opened your mouth, ready to deny it, but the look on his face – the teasing glint in his eyes, the slight lift of his brow – made it clear he wasn’t buying whatever excuse you were about to throw at him.
Instead, you crossed your arms and leaned back. “Fine. Maybe I just wanted you to stay a little longer.”
The smirk faded, just slightly. His gaze flickered over your face, his amusement softening into something quieter, something warmer.
“You could’ve just asked,” he said.
Your breath caught.
Then, as if sensing the weight of his own words, he straightened, rolling his shoulders like he could shake it off.
You tried to ignore the sudden heat that rose in your cheeks, still pretending that the whole situation – your really embarrassing scheme to get him to stay – was perfectly normal.
You shook your head, pushed the thoughts aside as you rose from the couch and walked toward him. His gaze followed you, amusement danced in his eyes as you stopped in front of him. Without thinking, your eyes flickered to his finger – still wrapped in the bright pink Hello Kitty bandaid you slapped on him earlier. The absurdity of it all hit you again, and for a moment, you felt the urge to cover your face.
But Cregan didn't let it slide. "You know," he drawled, holding up his hand, the bandaid on full display, "I felt the care and attention here, but–” He lifted an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitched, “Hello Kitty?"
You rolled your eyes but approached him anyway. You focused on his finger, ignored the growing warmth that spread through you as you reached out, your fingers brushed his skin as you took his hand in yours. “They were the only ones at the store,” you muttered, glancing at him briefly, expecting him to laugh it off.
He just stared at you, his eyes narrowed slightly. “Mm-hmm. I was sure they were,” he said, his voice smooth but edged with skepticism. “Couldn’t find any grown-up band-aids, huh?”
You snorted and held his finger a little more gently, glanced up at him now, met his gaze with a faint, nervous smile. “They were cute. I thought you might like them.”
He tilted his head, studied you with an intensity that made it hard to keep your thoughts from scattering. “You didn’t think I’d notice?” His voice was lower now, almost a whisper, and the playful teasing was gone, replaced with something... different.
You felt his hip brush against yours, a subtle, accidental touch that sent a spark of awareness through you. The proximity was sudden, sharp. You leaned back against the counter, the cool surface grounded you as your pulse began to race in a way you couldn’t quite control. Your focus remained on his finger, but his proximity – the weight of his gaze on you – felt heavier than anything you’d ever known.
His eyes flickered down to your mouth, just for a split second, before returning to your eyes, and it felt like the world narrowed to just the two of you. Your hand, still holding his, trembled slightly. You tried to tell yourself it was just the oddness of the moment, the intimacy of the small gesture, but deep down you knew there was more to it than that. His fingers, warm and strong, rested in your hand, his thumb brushed over your knuckles in that unconscious way he did, and it took everything in you not to close the space between you.
The silence stretched between you, charged with everything unsaid. His fingers were still tangled with yours, warm and steady despite the slight tremor you felt in your own hand. When you finally looked up, the intensity in his eyes made your breath catch.
"I should probably go," he whispered, but he didn't move away. If anything, he seemed to lean closer, his free hand coming to rest on the counter beside you.
"Probably," you agreed, but your other hand had somehow found its way to his chest, fingers curling slightly into the fabric of his shirt.
Time seemed to slow down. You could feel his heartbeat under your palm, fast and strong. His eyes dropped to your lips again, lingering this time.
"Tell me to go," he murmured, so close now that you could feel his breath against your skin.
Instead, you lifted your chin slightly, closing the last bit of distance between you. His lips met yours softly at first, hesitant, questioning. Then your hand slid up to the back of his neck, fingers threading through his hair, and something in him seemed to break.
He pressed closer, deepening the kiss as his hand moved from the counter to your waist, pulling you against him. Your back hit the counter, but you barely noticed, too caught up in the feeling of him – the way he tasted like coffee and something sweeter, how his thumb traced circles on your hip, how he kissed you like he'd been thinking about it for weeks.
When you finally broke apart, both breathing heavily, he rested his forehead against yours. His eyes were dark, intense, filled with something that made your heart race even faster.
"I've wanted to do that," he said roughly, "for forever."
You couldn't help but laugh softly, your fingers still playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. "Is that why you were so quiet?"
He smiled against your lips. "Partly." Then he was kissing you again, slower this time, like he had all the time in the world to learn the taste of you.
You pulled back just enough to look at him, unable to stop smiling. "You know Sara and Jace are going to be insufferable about this."
"Mmm," Cregan hummed against your lips. "They'll never let us hear the end of it." His fingers traced along your jaw, gentle and exploratory. "Sara's been dropping hints for weeks."
"Weeks?" You raised an eyebrow. "Try months."
He laughed softly, the sound vibrating through his chest where it pressed against yours. He laughed softly, the sound vibrating through his chest where it pressed against yours. Then his mouth found yours again, and this time the kiss was different – long, slow, and dizzyingly passionate. His fingers tangled in your hair, tilting your head just so, and you couldn't help but wonder if there was anything this man wasn't exceptionally good at.
When you pulled back, you toyed with the few hair strands that had fallen onto his face. He still hadn’t stepped back, still held you like he wasn’t quite ready for the night to end. And maybe you weren’t either.
For a long moment, neither of you spoke. The weight of it settled between you, the knowledge that this – whatever this was – had changed something, shifted it into something new, something neither of you could brush aside with an easy joke.
Cregan’s fingers brushed up your arm, slow and deliberate, his gaze flickering over your face like he was debating something.
Then, quieter this time, more serious: “Should I stay?”
Your breath hitched. It wasn’t just about tonight. You could hear it in the way he asked, in the way his fingers curled slightly at your waist.
You swallowed, your voice softer now. “Would you, if I asked?”
His grip tightened, just slightly, just enough to make your pulse stutter. “Yeah,” he admitted, “I would.”
You exhaled, your fingers tracing absentmindedly along his collarbone. He was close enough that you could see the flecks of gold in his eyes, the warmth there, the hesitation.
Then you smiled, small and knowing. “Good.”
He huffed a laugh, shaking his head. But he still stayed.
taglist: @smurfelle @elliaze @sillylittlepenguin181818 @lustrz-anna @lovelyteenagebeard @misshale21 @cecestea @n4tsha @inspirationquxxn @rin588 @anoravx @bbubbllejisoo @vividxpages @bucksplum @earth4angels @mattnott @princess-of-the-fandoms @shabnam2005 @nsr-15 @reeseelise @teasweeter @ginarely-blog @bpcr3yes @creganstarkk @st6rmbrn @marg141205 @shesneverreallythere @mother-homunculus @ohhdearmargot
Beware of the Canon
Posted:06/08/23
Title: Beware of the Canon
Dad Miguel O'Hara x GN Spider-Reader
BF Hobie Brown x GN Spider-Reader
Summary: You're Miguel's kid who's dating Hobie Brown
Author's note:
Word Count:807
Spider-verse Story List/ Master List
Warnings: Language
🔞18+ page due to dark and adult themes. Minors will be blocked 🔞
Hobie had asked you out a few weeks ago when he came to visit the Spider Society to hang out. You happily agreed and snuck out when your father was busy.
The first date was a smashing success. How could it not be when you're bashing in nazi skulls with a young hot punk who's got superpowers!
Hobie just couldn't help but take you on date after date. One day, it's an underground show in a dimension in the corner of the universe the next your eating stolen sweets on top of a freshly graffitied Statue of Liberty.
To be honest, you're not exactly sure when you become official. It was just common knowledge for you to refer to each other as partners.
Today, Hobie escorted you back to your earth with an arm over your shoulder laughing about something stupid. "Huhm." The sound of your father clearing his voice catches both of your attention.
You look up to see your father, Miguel, standing in your bedroom with his arms crossed. "Jigs up." Hobie chuckled and put his hands up. Miguel glared at you, not bothering to even acknowledge Hobie, who walked over to your bed to crash.
"What the hell were you thinking sneaking off to other dimensions behind my back? Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?" Your father had his voice serious and raised but not enough to be yelling. "Not to mention the shit that you've been doing in those dimensions. I mean, honestly, spray painting the Statue of Liberty." You smirk at the memory. "A symbol spreading the falsehood of liberty while dozens of minorities suffer..." You say as Miguel continues. "You stole historical artifacts from the British museum..." You lifted your chin proudly. "Returned said artifacts to their original owners..." You corrected. "And worst of all, you've been trying to help spider people break cannon!" He shouts. You stare into his eyes for a moment, trying to think of a witty response. "Yeah, I got nothing for that one..." You looked pasted your dad to see Hobie smiling at you, happy that you don't feel shameful for ehat he call real spider-man duties.
Miguel stares into your eyes pissed off. "How long did you think you would be able to get away with seeing him behind my back?" You signed. "Honestly... it didn't feel behind your back... at least not the relationship part. I love him." His face softens and places a protective hand on your shoulder. "Y/n... beware of the canon. You're a spider person... if you get too close to him-" you cut him off. "He'll die?" He didn't respond, making you scoff. "We know that, Papa. That's why we've been testing your canon theory..." His jaw clenched and started to shake his head, trying not to say something he'll regret.
"You're grounded. Give me your bracelet." You looked at him wide-eyed and then gave it to him. "Oohhh~" Hobie teased at the threat, knowing damn well he wouldn't listen to it. "And you!" Miguel whips around to see Hobie laying on your bed with his boots still on. "I- I can't. I just can't." He turns towards the bedroom door. "I ain't even here," Hobie responds to himself. "No more dimension jumping for you till you've earned back my trust and shown me that you can not only be responsible but that you take canon breaking more seriously." He paused after he opened the door. He holds your face with one hand. "I've already lost one kid and refuse to lose another." He kisses your forehead. "Aww, that's a happy little ending, in it?" Miguel glared up at him. "Get your damn boots off the bed."
Hobie hops to sit up, letting his feet hit the floor. Miguel rolls his eyes and bent down to you again. "Him? Seriously?" You nodded with a smile. He looks back at Hobie, then you. "You know there's plenty of respectable young Peter Parkers out there..." You cocked an eyebrow. "Not all of them but a few..." You crossed your arms playfully. He sighed in defeat. "Worth a shot." He kisses your head again before stepping out of the room. "Go wash up. Dinner will be ready soon." You nodded and started to walk towards your bathroom.
Miguel stopped before closing the door and opened it again. "Oh and Hobie." Hobie stopped checking you out to look at him. "Yeah, mate?" "Get the hell out of my house." He said, making Hobie chuckle and stand. "Yes, sir. I'll have your offspring home before supper, yeah?" Hobie, shoot a web at you yanking you from your bathroom to his chest. Hobie kisses your lips. "What?" Miguel said, confused, opening the door one last time. He sees Hobie holding you in his arms as he opens up a portal.
"Hey, wait!" Miguel yells after you guys as the portal closes. "Ay, coño!"
Dame Maggie Smith as Muriel Donnelly The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2015)
KIT HARINGTON Pompeii (2014)
I'm your biggest fan
I'll follow you until you love me
Papa-paparazzi
Baby, there's no other superstar
You know that I'll be
Your papa-paparazzi
Promise I'll be kind
But I won't stop until that boy is mine
Baby, you'll be famous
Chase you down until you love me
Papa-paparazzi
Cregan just went ; “like northerners” like okay. Im pretty sure that i just moaned
alicent hightower x rhaenyra’s daughter! reader
warnings: pseudo-incest, age gap (like she’s literally old enough to be reader’s mother), kinda perv! alicent i guess? part two is here.
thinking abt alicent w/ rhaenyra’s daughter! reader, as her only daughter, you were her very much protected and loved child, she was nothing but very defensive over you, as lovingly as a mother can be. but when you reaches the maturity, the queen starts to see you with a different perspective, you weren’t just the spoiled little protected daughter of her enemy, but a pretty young lady who caught her attention and thoughts. she loved how much you looked like rhaenyra in looks but was much more innocent and quiet than she was at your age, she loves to see the smile forming on your pretty lips when she tells you that you were so alike your mother when she was younger but even more gorgeous, she loves to watch your big eyes eying her when you think she wasn’t looking and loves to know that rhaenyra is fully aware of the queen’s exchange of looks with her daughter.
she has this growing feeling between her legs when she saw you bite your lip, the dreams she have at night about taking your purity with her fingers, taking of your dress and expose you to her wishes, lay you down with your legs wide open, presenting yourself to your queen, then ruining you for any man, for any marriage, having you begging and crying for her to do the most profanities and unholiness things with your soft body, to take you in ways only a husband could, to make you hers, property of the queen and no one else, she thinks about stick her nails on your smooth milky thighs and uses her mouth to make you scream for forgiveness from your grace… oh how she desires you to herself. corrupting your immaculate presence of a princess and turn you in nothing more than a desperate adorable mess for her eyes only.
but it’s unnatural, of course, she tells herself that all of this it’s just purely desire of her heart to hit rhaenyra where would hurts the most, and that the gods would never be able to forgive her for such thing… that doesn’t stop her for pleasing herself at these thoughts when her only company in her dark room is the shallow light of the moon, though.
finding out you’re pregnant on the day of toji’s big mma match
tags —nsfw, unprotected sex, pregnancy, cum dump, pet names, riding, dacriphilia, cum slut, cockwarming, mood swings, morning sickness,
notes— links are informational NOT nsfw links! OPEN THEM!
one thing that always calmed toji was definitely being deep inside his most precious person. feeling you squeeze around him had his stomach clenching, lips clashing with yours as you whined.
“my dicks fuckin’ melting,” he pants. he had you in so many different positions, absolutely wrecking your body. currently he had you in one of your favorites. especially after missing him after he’d been away for so long. his hand laced in your small one, squeezing it with each sharp thrust. holding it beside your blessed out face.
“gunnu c…cumm,” your eyes flutter, your free hand held his face, lips falling open as he kissed you, groaning as he picked up the pace, your back arched up, legs crossed behind his back as he angled your hips up. he felt himself slide deeper inside letting you suck him in.
“remember the shape of my dick, pup?” he chuckles, sitting up on his knees to grab your hips, thumb falling over your swollen clit.
“mmh just know y-yours, toji!” his thumb circles your bundle of nerves watching you cry out, legs trembling.
“good girl,” his grin had your stomach bursting with joy, you love him so much. so much. your fingers reach out, desperate for his touch. “still so needy after all this time.” he takes your hand, leaning over to kiss the soft digits. your eyes are crossing as you feel your legs tremble. “my pretty wife…” he cooes, only making you tremble at his deep voice.
“shit, squeezin me tighter than usual!” you almost knock the wind out of the man as he crashes his lips, drinking your gasps and tears as you tremble around him. “trying to push me out?” he slaps the outside of your thigh as you cum around him.
“more cum,” you kiss his lips, sucking his tongue, playing with his scar as your eyes gloss over, too dumb to think of anything else.
toji pushes your legs higher, sinking deeper as the squelching of your pussy echoes in the bedroom. “love you, love you toji…toji—ah” your pretty chants has his body heating up and dick throbbing even bigger. you feel every vein that bulges around his fat girth and his big tip kissing your cervix.
“if you keep acting like a needy brat, ‘m gonna bust soon,” his voice is strained. he fell deeper than ever, your eyes crossing as toji practically drools into your mouth. your tight pussy around his throbbing cock only had his tongue lolling out.
“mph ah ‘s big,” the large bedroom balcony was wide open as the cool night breeze swept your moans.
“want it please,” you held him so close. arms squeezing around his sweaty neck as you kissed his pretty scar—
“gun kill me,” he felt his stomach tighten, dropping his sweaty head into your neck as he gives a few more very sloppy thursts, until he’s twitching unbelievably hard, hips stuttering inside as his tip sprays long ropes of cum.
“feels so warm, toji,” you lick his ear as toji hums, lazily rolling his hips inside you as he breathes heavily against your neck, a few strained groans coming out when he feels you clench, filling you up.
“take it all,” he pushes up, leaning over your face as he pants, your fingers holding his face as you pull him to your lips.
“I mean you’re still cumming—“ you suddenly squeal, toji flicking your clit causing your body to jump.
“don’t be all snarky,” he pants over your lips, your tongue hangs out as toji deepens the kiss. sucking your tongue, making your cream ooze around his bulging cock some more.
you rub your tummy as toji groans, pressing a hand over yours and pushing down, making you whimper. he was filling you up so good. you loved the feeling of him cumming inside you.
once his dick runs dry, he rests beside you, pulling you closer. your deep breath falling even as you two fall asleep.
toji kept his soft cock deep inside you, holding you close to his chest as you slept. the warmth and closeness wasn’t something he’d admit out loud, but he needed it.
A couple weeks go by, as you roll over to your side. your stomach hurting as you extend an arm out, only to feel an empty bed.
“to…ji…” you feel another uncomfortable churn before suddenly tripping out of bed and stumbling into the bathroom, quickly falling in front of the toilet as you throw up.
you miss toji, you almost whine. why was he gone so early? you don’t think much of it. instead you go about your day until toji comes home. leaning on the man as you sit with him on the couch. he’d gained some weight for the weigh in tomorrow, so he was bigger than usual.
“you went harder than usual last night,” you mumble in his side. toji looks over, noticing the healing bruise around your thighs, his big hand gliding between your legs to rub the skin.
“i thought i heard someone cry for it to be harder,” he snarks.
“well like ya, but i have a shoot tomorrow,” you mumble rolling over so you were hugging toji.
you were more affectionate than you usually were, toji notes. you’ve been attached to him since he walked in. sitting beside him as he bathed, helping him get dressed, now you’re all over him. wasn’t this was your favorite show? is your period soon?
“you feelin alright?” toji runs a hand on the back of your head, petting you gently, your arms still wrapped around his shoulders.
your leg glides across his lap, nuzzling yourself onto him even closer. “mhm.”
he wraps an arm around you pulling you closer as he continues watching. you’re quiet, maybe you were just tired…you were wearing his sweater and sweats, but he could feel you trying to get closer to him.
“you’re needy tonight, pup,” toji grunts, feeling your hand down the front of his pants, playing with his semi-hard on.
“just missed you,” you kiss his ear, toji hums snaking his own hand down the back of your sweats and slipping a finger inside you from behind.
it didn’t take long for his fat cock to be nuzzled deep inside your dripping cunt.
“something happen today?” toji holds your cheek, the other on your hip helping you bounce on his lap. your ass slapping down on his firm thighs, whining at how big he is.
“why do you keep asking that?” you huff, getting annoyed with his questions. “just…uh, wanna feel you,” your nails dig into his shoulder, head falling back as you chase your high.
“you’re acting…”
“what?” you squeal feeling toji grab the back of your neck pulling you to his lips. you cry as he kisses you aggressively.
“I’m asking how my wife is, don’t act like a child,” he snaps, making you whine, clenching around him. toji groans getting worked up and helping you fuck him faster.
he could never get tired of this view. your head thrown back as you held his shoulder and the other hand holding his wrist that was playing with your tits. you were so fucking beautiful. your eyes fluttered as you cried out and cumming with a shake, letting him spill inside you again.
usually you would cuddle into him and let him soothe a hand over your back, but instead you stood up, his cock slipping out of your holec immediately watching his cum ooze out, still sticking to his tip, as some more cum slid down to hos base. your hand cupped your pussy and headed to the bathroom.
“baby?” he leans over the couch, puzzled.
“haveta pee,” you mumble, discarding your sweater and the door shuts.
toji follows a couple minutes later, grabbing a towel to clean off before tucking himself. he looks over seeing you in the shower. sliding the screen open, you hum looking over your shoulder.
“you’re worrying me here, did something happen? did i do something?” toji was horrible with words, but that doesn’t mean he’s a complete fucking idiot. he thinks he can read you pretty well especially having married you. likewise. yet, this is the first time he’s seen you act so…moody.
“worried about what? we just had sex?” you wash the conditioner from your hair, opening your eyes to look at the man. he looked so confused.
“dunno,” he mumbles. he wanted you to confide in him. is he really that bad with emotions that you can’t tell him what’s going on? “can you tell me you’re okay?”
“I’m okay,” you smile softly, quickly easing his nerves, but he can’t help but look at you longingly.
“c’mere,” his hand reaches out, cupping your face and pulling you close. “gimme a kiss.”
you smile as you walk closer, away from the water, to lean high up meeting his lips firmly. he’s leaning down, holding your face as he continues kissing you. he couldn’t get enough of you, his hand stroking the back of your neck as you hum, rubbing your fingers on his wrist.
toji still had his guard up. you were in fact “okay”, but you seem more irritated one second, but suddenly okay the next. he checked your temperature and you seemed fine.
“she’s been really moody,” toji chugs some water as he leans against the ring.
shiu doesn’t bother to look up from his ipad. “what did you do?”
toji rolls his eyes. “thanks.”
“did you forget her birthday, leave your dirty socks in the kitchen?”
toji fixes his gloves. “who do you take me for? you’re no help.”
“she could just be sick for your ass,” shiu shrugs, looking up to laugh at toji’s annoyed expression.
“fuck off.”
your head was pounding. heart thumping out of your chest as you sat on the cold tile floor. your lips trembled, hands running cold….no way….no way…..
“hon, he’s asking about you! you alright in there?” shiu’s hand knocked on the door.
of all the days to find out your pregnant, you had to find out now. you couldn’t hold back and wait until tomorrow…but you were nervous! you couldn’t wait—
you inhale sharply. “I’m fine.”
the moment you step out though, your eyes immediately scan around, overstimulated by all the people moving around, the coach warming up toji, shiu answering calls—
“you alright, baby?” toji is loosening his muscles as he looks up at you, ready to head out as they try to push him out the door . you don’t even realize how your legs automatically carried you to him. “baby?”
you’re an idiot, truly. because the way his hand stroked the back of your neck and the way his voice sent your stomach fluttering.
“i have to tell you something….” you bite the inside of your cheek. no, you couldn’t tell him now, that would be absolutely disastrous.
“ya, quickly,” his thumb caresses your cheek, waiting for you. instead you only lean up, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him to your lips. his lips automatically open as you kiss him feverishly. you pull away breathing for a minute. toji’s eyes are slightly open watching the way you squeeze your eyes shut as you kiss him….“you alright?”
your breathing heavily, before forcing out a tight lipped smile. his brow quirks even more concerned as you nod. “f’course…stomach just hurts a bit,” you peck his lips again before letting him head out.
your eyes follow him as he glances over his shoulder. he was concerned, he still couldn’t figure out what was going on. maybe something happened at work? but you haven’t complained about anything, which you always do if there’s a problem—
“you got this toji, make sure to keep your guard up after his left hooks!” his coach yelled in his ear as toji stepped into the cage. his arms snapping out, before stepping up to the middle. his eyes immediately ventured out, scanning the front row to find you. you weren’t looking at him…
“scared to look at me, king?” his opponent mocked, practically making toji roll his eyes into his skull.
once they shook hands and the round began toji was in the zone. his fist colliding with his opponents stomach then face. sending ripples through his body. it was always impressive watching toji move around the cage, his feet carrying him so fast you could barely keep up.
your heart felt like it was about to leap from your chest, and not in a good way. would toji even want a kid? he’s in the highlight of his career, he wouldn’t have time for this…are you even ready?!? you’ve been with toji for awhile, but you never imagined having kid so early, did you even discuss it with him. would he think you’re not ready??
toji took a hard elbow across the face, knocking him to the ground.
“FOUL!” the ref shouted. your eyes were filled with worry. you like watching toji fight, it was exhilarating, but this time you felt sick.
toji’s eyes seemed to find you immediately. ready to get back up, but he stopped breathing for a second…..the simple gesture of your hand on your stomach…he felt his heart beat a little faster as he unconsciously, almost automatically, connected the dots in his head.
“oh fuck.”
the eye contact you made said absolutely everything. it was too easy reading you. his stomach churned, his fist slammed into his opponent. he couldn’t think, taking hits he would normally dodge. your hands falling over your face as toji kept getting beat, over and over and over—
what is going on?!? toji was screaming at himself. stop thinking! just move!
with every ounce of his being, toji used it to land a direct blow across his opponents head, immediately knocking him out on impact. the ripples of his muscles, sent a wave of adrenaline pumping through his veins. and the only thing he could do was shove the flooding people coming into the cage, not even letting the ref grab his hand to announce his victory.
your eyes blew wide as toji fell to his knees in front of you, immediately between your legs as his hands grabbed your waist, staring up at you with bright green eyes. his chest was heaving, blood still trickling from his split lip and cut eyebrow.
“toji, congratulations!” you immediately try to wipe the blood with your sleeve, not caring that you spent so much on it. his dark green eyes were blown, immediately falling on your beautiful lips, congratulating him over and over—
your heart stops. his lips press softly on the back of your hands. kissing so gently…. he’d normally go for your lips and shamelessly deepen it—
“don’t be nervous,” he speaks softly, surprising the living hell out of you. he’s never been so soft after a match. but the look in his eyes immediately told you…he knew.
“I don’t know if I’m ready…” your head dropped, you couldn’t be a mother, you’ve fucked up so many times! you lost your keys just a week ago and accidentally got on the wrong train home after a long day!
toji tilts your chin. “and your career—“
“do you wanna keep it?” he asks, tilting his head not breaking eye contact. your stomach was churning even more. you felt like throwing up. you never gushed about having children, nor did you ever wish to have some. but it’s weird….its weird because you felt really warm inside. you didn’t know why your mode was shifting, why you were okay, but the sureness in toji’s eyes—having him come immediately to you.
you could only nod, biting your cheek so you wouldn’t cry, but covering your face with your free hand. the mma victor could only smile, leaning up to press a gentle kiss to your forehead. the audience and reporters around had no clue what was happening, but everyone was swooning at how gentle toji was being.
“I’ll be the one to fuck it up, so don’t worry.” he teases.
you hit his chest. “don’t say that.” you take your hand off to look at him, he had a light flush on his cheeks. you’ve never seen him so calm after a match. “you sure?”
“kids are annoying brats, but if it looks like you…,” you roll your eyes. “what did you think was gonna happen?” you quirk a brow.
your breath hitched as he leaned his face close to your ear, his voice low, similar to how he spoke to you when you’re intimate. “your pretty eyes always filling with tears if I don’t stuff you full with my cum.”
your face burned red as his hand stroked your neck unbeknownst to the cameramen and reporters all waiting for toji to return. “can’t remember a time where you weren’t begging for it deep inside.” his hand travels down to your lower stomach!
you felt your legs closing as you hid your face in your hand, trying desperately to compose yourself, but my god, this man was so absolutely shameless.
“wonder what day of me pumping your tiny pussy with my cum was the one that struck gold—“
“toji,” you almost cry out only for his ear, so unbelievably hot from embarrassment you couldn’t breathe. “are you trying to kill me?!”
“of course not, pup, i was just reminiscing,” he laughs, pulling away to hold your face.
you roll your eyes at his amused faced. “haha, fuck you. so mean,” you shove his shoulder back making the man laugh, as he leans forward, tilting your chin to capture your lips.
he winces for just a moment, his cut lip stinging as you taste the metal on your tongue. you loved kissing him. your ears still hot as toji pulled away, his hand slipping down to hold yours as he walked with you back to the reporters. he did not take his hands off you that entire night.
when videos and photos were released, fans were deep diving to try and read toji and his wife’s lips. desperate to know what was so important.
but was only confirmed at his match a year later, when he stepped into the cage and gave a wave to his wife and little baby sitting on her lap.
link // link // link // link // link // link // link
OPEN THESE LINKS 🔗 do not stop talking about this! I hope u enjoy my fics but it’s all pointless if u don’t open these links and repost! information is power! especially and most importantly NOW!!
thank you kind sir 🙏🏼
Hi I'm not sure if you're taking requests (i don't know how the request work so sorry)
Could u write a one-shot, where Reader and Duncan have a mission and them go to the place but before do the work, they arrive at a hotel and them only rent a room with one bed (obviously) Duncan tells her that he'll take the bed and she'll sleep on the floor, then he go to take a shower and she doesn't care about his request and takes the bed, Duncan comes out and them start to fight because she didn't listen him, until she suggests that both take the bed (Duncan don't like the idea but don't decline and just does it) after a while she stars to tempt him at first he's angry bout all the situation, but the moment takes another path and u alr know (smut) if u r comfortable with ofc. (And sorry my english isn't great sorry for the type errors)
This is an idea of one chat with a bot of c.ia but the bots r not as good as a writer <3
♡: anon i know about this bot and i have done some freaky stuff w it 🤭 i love this request
Contumacious
PAIRING: Duncan Vizla x Bratty!Reader
CONTENT WARNING: smut (18+, mdni), unprotected sex, age gap (reader is in her twenties), bratty reader, dominant duncan, tension, oral (male receiving), duncan calls reader ‘little girl’, overstimulation, choking, hair pulling, biting, slight blood, degrading, talkative duncan, slight (very minor) fluff at the end.
SYNOPSIS: On a mission, Duncan decides to stay at a hotel room for further planning and to rest. But when he orders you to take the floor and decides to stake his claim over the bed, things become heated between the two of you.
Duncan didn't expect to see a single bed in the room when he stormed in, along with you, who carried your own bag of basic necessities.
Frustration was as clear as water on his rough features when he realized he'd have to sacrifice a good night's sleep if he were to allow you slumber along him.
So he didn't sacrifice shit.
The man dropped his duffle bag over the bed, in a way branding it as his. “I get the bed, you get the floor.”
You couldn't even oppose because he'd already left for the bathroom, assuming to take a shower. Your lips formed a frown, brows furrowing. Just who did Duncan Vizla think he was? You both were equals on this mission, sent by Damucles to strike down a Mexican mob boss.
Duncan being older didn't mean he could do as he wished. You stood firm on give respect in order to receive it, age had nothing to do with it. You also placed your bag on the bed and slipped off your boots, sprawling across it.
If you had to take the bed forcefully, then so be it.
When Duncan was finished with his shower and came out, he was the least bit pleased with the sight afore him. You on your stomach, laying on the bed, feet up in the air and oscillating.
His bushy eyebrows scrunched in irritation. The man stormed towards you, standing right in front of you and you lifted your gaze up fron the pistol in your hands. Only to acknowledge him before going back to toying with the weapon in your hands.
That only worked to raise his anger more.
“I told you the bed is mine. Get your little ass off it.” You lifted your head, to face him and then slid off the bed. Now standing right in front of him — gaze unwavering and posture strong. Duncan knew you were one hell of a stubborn brat. He'd come across you before and he hated every bit of it.
You placed your hand on your hip.
A pose that struck him with a lash of irritation.
“It is a big bed and who are you to claim it first? Just because you're old, you think you can come in here and order me around?” Duncan’s eyes flared up. Nostrils expanding and the anger on his face was like embers swirling in lava.
He took a step forward. “Listen here, little girl. I might be old but you could never reach the amount of missions I have been successful at, nor do you know real struggle. Try sleeping in the Siberian Winds with no clothes, not a single thread to cover your damn body.”
You couldn't believe it.
He was rubbing his life experiences in your face as if he didn't himself chose to work for Damocles.
He became the black kaiser because he wanted to.
In the heat of the prickling anger, you also stepped forward. Your chest brushing against his. “You chose that for yourself but I won't let you choose the bed. Either we both sleep on it together or you take the fucking floor. There's no way in hell I'm sleeping on the floor.”
Duncan groaned.
He knew of the abundance stubbornness you possessed. There was no way you would back out, knowing that the way you got yourself snuck into his mission was by being completely adamant and demanding money if not allowed in.
But he too couldn't retreat, as his pride was on the line. “I could easily throw you on the floor, little girl.”
You snickered. “I'd like to see you try.”
Duncan stared at you. Drinking in your petite form and how small you were in comparison to him. Primal and dark was what stirred within the base of his abdomen when his mind finally grasped on how pathetic you were. Indeed you were a trained killer, amazing at martial arts too but Duncan knew against him you stood no chance.
Due to the diligence of your work and mission, Duncan never really focused on your features.
Your challenge nearly caused him to pick you up and toss you on the damn floor. Duncan raised his hand — fingers opening to wrap around your throat. The inside of his fingers brushed across your throat and you swallowed tightly, waiting for him to act out his aggression.
Duncan’s hand fell.
Your brow raised at his defeat. “Fine but you better keep at your side. If I see a damn leg or arm of yours on my side, you best believe I'm choppin’ it off.”
You dismissed him with your hand and Duncan’s hand formed into a fist. He really wanted to teach you a lesson. Hating how you paraded around Damocles like you were the only one, an egoistic but skilled assasian.
Just for the sake of the mission, Duncan let it go.
He settled on the bed on one side and watched you take out your own clothes from the duffle bag, making your way to the bathroom. In your hand were some panties and a loose, button up shirt. It was what you'd managed to pack in a hurry when you were told about your mission with Duncan.
Honestly, you sort of looked up to him.
No one was as heavily respected in Damocles as he was.
The Black Kaiser.
Aim perfect and sharp. He knew so many ways to discard the enemy and you'd only witnessed a few of them on this mission. It filled you with unbridled excitement when you'd finally landed yourself with him.
Your shower was relaxing. Warm water soothing all your strained muscles — the combat sure taking its toll on you. Slow hands caressing the skin, ridding of it any dirt that lingered. After done shampooing your hair and washing your body, you dried yourself and changed into your clothes.
The outfit was sultry to say the least but you knew Duncan was a man who would never find you attractive.
You knew of his irritation and annoyance aimed at you. It was honestly adorable at times how he got pissed, finding joy in pushing at his buttons.
When you stepped out of the bathroom, Duncan’s head snapped into your direction and his expression hardened. There you sauntered towards the bed with bare thighs and plush breasts peeking out from within the confines of your shirt.
He swallowed, his adjustment of himself not slipping past you.
You laid down on the bed and let out a sigh, finally finding peace. A good night’s rest was surely needed and this bed could provide it all. As you shifted to find a comfortable position, your shirt rose up in the friction exposing the black lining of your panties.
Duncan caught a glimpse of it.
His eyes darkening.
“Could've worn something warmer.” Duncan said, not looking at you. A scowl made its way across your face as you sat up, body strength on your palms. Leaning forward made your loose shirt fall by your sides, cleavage revealed.
“You got a problem with everything, old man.”
He rolled his eyes.
“Is that your only retort? Calling me old?” He snapped, staring at you. For a moment his gaze lingered to your lips and then back up to your face. Eyes filled to the brim with frustration and something – dark too. Lust or maybe anger.
“Are you not old? I bet you can't even get it up anymore.” You chuckled and that seemed to have crossed the line. Duncan reached for you, hand entangling in your hair. You felt him tug on the roots and pull you closer, face only a mere inches away from yours.
Your breath hitched.
Fighting him right now could get really dirty and you wanted to see how far Duncan was willing to go. His action only working to entice you. “You really should watch your damn mouth, little girl. I don't take nicely to such disrespect.”
You let out a chuckle. “Accept it. You cannot get it up, old man.”
Duncan’s fist tightened, nostrils flaring at your impolite words. You stared at him, your tongue slithering out like an enticing snake and running across the plump of your lips in an attempt to seduce him. “Or can you? I've heard older men fuck better. Is that true, Duncan?”
Duncan growled.
He tugged you down, to between his legs. Duncan nuzzled your face against the tent in his trousers. His bulge protruding as he shoved your face against it. “Does that look like I can't get it up, little girl?”
You shook your head slowly, hands hastily moving to pull down his trousers, paired with his briefs. His cock sprung out, nearly hitting you in the face and a soft gasp escaped your lips. It was big — fucking massive and you hadn't expected a man of Duncan's age to have such a big cock. Precum sheened over his tip.
It was thick and you knew the pain of the stretch inside you would be delicious. Veins ran from its base, disappearing underneath the pink tip. Your mouth watered at the sight, fingers gently wrapping around the girth.
A sweet hiss fell from Duncan’s lips.
You parted your lips and pushed out your tongue, running it in little licks over his tip, managing to taste his salty precum. Duncan’s breath grew heavier along each lick — chest moving in a slow rhythm.
His fingers still drowned in your hair. Duncan tugged harder, an indication for you to pick up. So you did, wrapping your lips around his tip and sucking it in, taking his fat cock all the way into your tight mouth until it had fully disappeared. You could feel it slip past the little uvula hanging in the air of your mouth, the warm flesh feeling like embers over your tongue.
“Jesus, you're pretty good at taking a cock.”
A giggle almost slipped — you attempted to breath through your nose and salvated around his throbbing dick. Your eyes met Duncan’s drowsy ones and as you whimpered, the vibrations from your throat shot straight through his abdomen.
His hands guided down your head furthermore, burying your nose into his neatly trimmed pubic hair.
Duncan pulled you up, only to slam his cock back inside your mouth. A repetitive action, his thighs shaking and flexing whenever the wetness and constriction of your throat welcomed him. Panting like a hungry beast, he fucked himself into your mouth.
Hips snapping up in desperate thrusts to gain his release.
“Good little girl. This is what your mouth is made for—what it's supposed to do.” He grunted when your struggles began in the form of small hands lightly punching at his thick thighs. “You're only a cocksucking little bitch.”
Tears stung your eyes from how horribly you gagged all over him. His tip repeatedly hitting the back of your throat while moaning out loud. Divulging his pleasure to the people outside the hotel room.
Duncan loved the way you gagged around his cock. Tears sitting prettily in your beautiful eyes and he couldn't help but feel himself come near at the sight of you, this weak and pathetic underneath him. If he'd known sharing a bed would lead to this, the man would've given up in one single breath.
“Fuck—fuck. I'm close, I'm so fuckin’ close, my little girl. Keep suckin’ my cock like that, like the filthy bitch you are.” Duncan was vocal.
That was for sure and you enjoyed every bit of it.
After fucking your mouth for quite some time, Duncan finally shot loads of warm fluid down your throat. You struggled, kicking and thrashing everywhere but he didn't let go. He only continued to ride out his orgasm, feeling his own cock lubing up in the process of fucking his cum down your throat.
When he let you go, you promptly pulled back with a loud gasp. A sharp intake of oxygen. Cum and saliva dribbling in rivulets down your chin, tears wetting your cheeks. Duncan watched as your tits rose up and down, bouncing down slightly whenever you dragged in air.
Your eyes widened when you saw how Duncan’s soft cock suddenly became hard again, rising up. Curved and strong — tip caressing his abdomen. It was embarrassing for you because you'd called him out for not being able to get it up, here he was. In his late fifties, ready to fuck you dumb.
“Fuck you lookin’ at? Hop on.”
Your pussy throbbed. An insatiable ache that only his delicious cock could satisfy. You tossed one leg over his waist, while holding his cock with your hand. Aligning it at your hole, you finally sunk down on it. Duncan and you groaned in unison.
Feeling his cock enter you was such an indecipherable feeling. He filled you all the way, his tip reaching your womb almost. You placed both your palms over his chest, running your nails into the grey and black hair on his chest. Your lips parted, eyes rolled as you fully consumed him.
“Such a hungry fuckin’ pussy you've got. Taking me all the way in.” Duncan raised his hand and smacked your ass. “Cmon, move now.”
You obliged — beginning to grind your hips. In a slow back and forth rhythm. Duncan’s head was thrown back, pressed into the headboard while both his hands settled at your hips. Helping you grind down on his cock. You didn't even want to move, that's how much you fucking relished in him filling you up but then he lifted you, slamming you back down on his cock.
“Yeah, just like that.” He growled when you started to slide up and down. Hopping like a damn bunny in heat, feeling his veiny thick cock rub at your sensitive walls. Your whines were loud and prominent through the room as you held tightly onto his broad shoulders.
Lips agape and hair wet from the shower, it made you appear ten times prettier than you were. Duncan’s cock only hardened more, if possible inside you. The tremor in your whole frame was slowly becoming known to him and he scoffed, a breathty grunt leaving his lips. “Can't even fuck yourself on my cock and you have the audacity to speak to me with disrespect.”
“I'm sorry,” came a whimper from you. Nails digging into the skin of his shoulders, dragging them down into tiny slits.
Duncan helped you ride him, both his hands tugging at the flesh of your rear. He drove himself into you, in and out, in a fast rhythm. It was all too hot. Your body felt like it was boiling up and Duncan’s hands moved up to hold your breasts, thumbs flicking the nipples.
Dark brows furrowed and lips fallen apart, he let out aggressive grunts like some hounddog that couldn't have enough of you. “Pathetic whore. Jus’ a pathetic little whore who needed to be fucked. If—fuck,” he grunted, balls throbbing. “If you craved a cock this badly, you could've said so.”
Your eyes squeezed shut and walls gripped him like a vice. Duncan leaned forward and bit down on your shoulder, teeth digging into the skin hard enough to draw blood. He continued making you ride him, loving the way your tits bounced in his hands. A feeling driving him delirious.
The sound of skin against skin grew.
A languorous heat spread in your lower stomach. An indicator of your upcoming orgasm. Duncan’s hands kept playing with your soft mounds — his teeth littering bite marks at where your neck and shoulder became one and the way his hammered his cock inside your cunt was enough to push you over the edge.
Your arms flew to his shoulders, holding him tightly. “Duncan, ‘m gonna cum. ‘m so close, please.”
He looked up at you, loving the warmth you produced when you'd clung onto him like a koala to a tree. He pressed his lips over yours, something he himself was in shock at. His teeth tugged at your lower lip, sucking on it and as the kiss warmed, so did your cunt.
Duncan groaned as you slammed down on his cock repeatedly. A strong and soul chilling orgasm tearing through you. Eyes rolling back to your head and whimpers of sensitivity echoing in the room. He held you tightly as you came, enjoying how your little frame suffered from convulsions under his hold.
Duncan didn't give you a chance to even register your climax. He'd already began thrusting up your cunt, arms wrapped around your waist in a bone crushing hold. “Wait—wait! I still— oh my god.”
He didn't let you relax.
After all he too needed to cum.
Duncan could feel the throbbing sensation in his balls and the pulsating of his fat cock inside you. With a few, harsh strokes delivered inside your pussy, he released himself and your head buried in his neck from the feeling of being filled to the brim. His hot cum shot out, rope by rope, decorating the gummy walls of your pussy.
You could feel all of it.
Heightened sensitivity.
Your body went limp over his, leisurely dropping and Duncan held you. Both of you panted like wild animals who'd just got done finishing their preys. Your breathing was uneven and your throat was parched. Duncan heaved out, his low groans sending waves of sparks to your aching cunt again.
Thick fingers running up and down your bare back, with his other hand he caressed your hair. He wasn't rough when it came to sex but at times he felt like destroying your cunt whenever you'd speak to him in that stuck up, vicious little tone.
Duncan’s hand that played with your hair suddenly tightened, fingers pulling on the soft locks and you whimpered.
You were thrown off his lap on the bed. Appalled at his actions, you turned to look at him but Duncan only pressed your head further into the bed with his large hand. His other hand pulled your lower body, bending your knees.
“Wh-What are you doing?” You gasped out, the question coming out muffled.
Duncan let out a chuckle. “You thought we were done, hm? There ain't no way we're done with one round, little girl.”
You couldn't even resist as Duncan sunk his cock into you. Back arching and spine curving, a muffled whine of need and satisfaction echoing. He held you down as he thoroughly fucked you, his hips colliding with yours. Balls hitting the swollen stripe of your cunt.
“Look at you.” His bated breath increased your libido, as you were also speechless at his. Duncan was still ready to go on meanwhile you were struggling with staying still. Tired and drained from all his harsh strokes.
His grip on your hair tightened as he pulled you up to his chest, locking you firmly. Duncan pulled out then pushed right back into you, his tip reaching your womb. A small bulge forming on your stomach everytime he slammed back into you. Tears of overstimulation dropped like pearls on your face and Duncan moaned in your ear.
“Good fuckin’ girl.” He praised.
Your walls clenched.
Duncan hissed and felt his strokes become steady, dragging across your spongy walls to feel them. Then he climaxed inside you, filling you up again once more. This time his cum dripped out of you, making a mess on his own cock and your thighs. Pussy glistening from the slick, cum and your own climax.
Duncan pulled out and pushed you back down on the bed.
He also collapsed next to you.
Chest rising up and down, breath a broken rhythm. You sniffled into the pillows, thighs shivering the overstimulation you'd suffered at the hands of Duncan. He wasn't as cruel as you'd depicted him to be. Duncan reached for you, pulling you closer to him and wrapping an arm around your waist.
His large arm covering the expanse of your chest.
“Sorry, little girl. You piss me off a lot.” He whispered and you flipped to face him, burying your face in his chest. “And I'll continue to piss you off.”
Despite the fact that he'd pretty much blown your back out twice, you still held on to your defiant traits. He let out a laugh, reaching over to grab a cigarette and light it up.
Dragging in a smoke, he brought the cigarette to your lips and your parted them, allowing him to settle it between them. You pursued his actions and released the smoke through your nostrils.
“That feels good.”
Duncan smiled. “Better than my cock?”
“Oh shut up.”