I Like How The Lack Of Spacing Here Implies That The Helpline Is There For Those Addicted To Eating Raw

fall in love with your shorter boss immediately

I'm reading Nicholas Meyer's The Seven-Per-Cent Solution and I thought tumblr would enjoy

✨️Holmes's vanilla extract shenanigans✨️:

"As you know, however, it is not my habit to go after the small fish while the big ones are at large. Mind the vanilla extract!" [Holmes] yelled suddenly and pulled me backwards from the two paces or so I had taken in the direction of the house. "You might have fallen in," he gasped, holding on to me to regain his balance.

[...]

"I may write a monograph on it," Holmes said, referring to the vanilla extract.

[...]

There he stopped dead before the empty tracks as Gloucester stopped at the edge of his cliff. The vanilla extract ended here.

[...]

"There were at least three choices, any one of which would have served my turn. Without vanilla extract," [Holmes] added, smiling.

[...]

"But I place my faith in vanilla extract. I have conducted experiments - and, well, if it proves false, Watson, this is one case your readers will be amused instead of amazed to read."

I thought it would be funnier if I left it out, but the context for Holmes’s sudden obsession with vanilla extract is that he made Professor Moriarty step into a puddle of it without Moriarty noticing. He could then trace Moriarty all the way across the continent with the help of Toby, the dog. Holmes decided to use vanilla extract because the creosote he had used in The Sign of Four turned out to be too common a smell, so Toby got confused.

Forget about torturing your blorbos, putting them through the ringer. I'm putting my blorbo in perfectly ordinary, pleasant situations. Their tortured personality will cause them anguish anyway, making an absolutely mundane scene into the most dramatic, agony filled affair as though the world is ending and it's all their fault

Not now kitten daddy's googling his symptoms

EVERYONE PLEASE LOOK AT THE CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT MY FRIEND GIFTED ME

IT'S MY KEYCHAIN BUT AS AN ORNAMENT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

A collection of Google AI overview results that give off Night Vale radio segment vibes:

Me when I remember something I said ages ago that was wrong or my values no longer align with

video proof that Mothfeather was a dangerous, fearsome predator even as a child

Hello! I really love your Holmes art! Can you please give some tips of how you draw Holmes and Watson?🥺

Absolutely! Sorry this took a while to answer! Also this is only how I do it!! You don’t have to follow these rules AT ALL!!

Also sorry for my dogshit handwriting if anybody wants to try and translate it please go ahead 😭

I’m reading on old superstitions and: “Do not go out collecting nuts on Sept 14th, holy Rood Day, as the devil will be out nutting too!” September 14th: the day the Devil nuts