Things Alastor Has Definitely Said 3

Things Alastor Has Definitely Said 3

Alastor: *reading a recipe* Whisk until pale... Lucifer, come here for a moment.

Lucifer: Hm, what?

Alastor: *grabs his arm, compares the batter to his skin* Hmm... I'd say that's close enough.

Alastor: How much of the Bible was even real?

Lucifer: Assume everything you read in it is false.

Alastor: I see, so Jesus never happened and God doesn't exist.

Lucifer: What? No—

Angel: What do you even know about addiction?

Alastor: ... Angel, I was a soldier in the First World War. I lived during the prohibition. I still take medicine with cocaine in it, and I still make moonshine in my bathtub.

Alastor: "What do I know about addiction," the nerve.

Vox: We could have been GREAT!

Alastor: Great what? Clowns? I don't want to be a part of your circus, Vox. Unlike you, I don't derive sexual pleasure from feeling humiliated. Take your Tony the Tiger impression somewhere else.

Vox:

Vox: How the fuck do you know who Tony the Tiger is?

Charlie: Look, Alastor, I'm not trying to step on your toes, but—

Alastor: You'd have a difficult time, given that I don't have any.

Alastor: Goodbye, chums! I'm off to have Girl Dinner with Rosie!

Alastor: Shut up, Susan.

Vaggie: ... That's not my name.

Alastor: ... Question, were you always an exorcist angel or did you have human relatives at some point? You remind me of someone.

Angel: And transgender is basically people who don't identify with the gender they were assigned to at birth.

Alastor: Oh, I see, so it's like how I tricked my sperm donor into thinking I was always a boy and made him think he was clinically insane for having memories of the contrary!

Angel:

Angel: You WHAT?!

More Posts from Misplaced-aquarius and Others

3 weeks ago
Will Da'an Ever Just Give Marina A Darn Drink!? Image Tagged With Fear And Hunger, Fear And Hunger Termina,

Will Da'an ever just give Marina a darn drink!? Image tagged with fear and hunger, fear and hunger termina, samarina – @peachy-artist on Tumblr Got inspired from this little silliness and this scene from the game Daan Refuses to Serve Marina - Fear & Hunger 2 #fearandhunger - YouTube so enjoy!


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2 months ago

50 Lamb Questions

1. Does your lamb go by any name other than The Lamb? If so, what?

2. How old was your lamb when they were sacrificed?

3. How long was your lamb held captive by heretics before their sacrifice?

4. Did your lamb kill anyone prior to their first death? If so, who?

5. When your lamb mourns a dead loved one from their past.. who is it?

6. Who raised your lamb?

7. Where was your lamb raised? A village? A prison? Constantly on the run?

8. Did your lamb have any specific skills pre-sacrifice?

9. How or where was your lamb caught?

10. How did your lamb feel with their head on the pedestal? Afraid? Relieved? Angry?

11. Does your lamb have any notable or unique features?

12. How tall is your lamb?

13. Is your lamb petite? Curvy? Fucking jacked?

14. Is your lamb’s wool pure white?

15. How does your lamb prefer to keep their wool? Short and shorn neat? Wild and untrimmed? Be honest are there branches in that bitch?

16. Do you base your lamb on any specific species of sheep? If so, which?

17. Do they use their own wool for anything?

18. On a scale of one to ten how floppy are their ears?

19. Do they bear any traits of forced domestication? Is their tail docked? Was their ear tagged? Do they have scars from being shorn (and nicked) against their will? Were they ever painted with or assigned a number rather than a name?

20. What do their horns look like?

21. Was your lamb born male, female, intersex, or do you have no opinion on their sex at birth?

22. Does your lamb use pronouns other than they/them? If so, which ones!

23. Are they capable of having children and would they want to have children?

24. If they were to be a parent or are, what epithet would they have their child use? Mom? Mama? Dad? Baba? Nony? Abba?

25. Do they wear something other than the canon cloak?

26. Does your lamb wear jewelry or makeup?

27. Is your lamb flirtatious?

28. Did your lamb have any partners pre-sacrifice?

29. Did your lamb take any followers as a partner?

30. Who is your lamb’s second in command or closest follower?

31. Is your lamb ever honest about their feelings or past? With who?

32. Is your lamb merciful? Did they ever refuse to spare someone? If so, why?

33. Is your lamb trustworthy?

34. Is your lamb quick or slow to trust others?

35. If your lamb could pick a cult job other than leader what would it be?

36. Is your lamb a good cook?

37. Does your lamb let cult members cook or heal or do they restrict them from certain duties?

38. What is your lamb’s favorite food or dish?

39. Does your lamb eat meat/fish/eggs?

40. What is your lamb’s stance on cannibalism?

41. What about their stance on torture?

42. Would your lamb ever kill a cult member?

43. How does your lamb deal with dissenters?

44. What is your lamb’s favorite weapon? Their least favorite?

45. Would they ever let a follower embrace their dark desire to eat poop?

46. What is your lamb’s favorite season?

47. Is your lamb’s favorite color something other than red?

48. How does your lamb really feel about death?

49. Does your lamb use substances? Are substance banned from cult grounds?

50. Freebie! Tell us any headcanon you want!


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3 months ago

It's important to take breaks and have smooches <3

The Cat Needs Attention !!

The cat needs attention !!


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4 months ago

By Glitter-Pastel-Scales

By Glitter-Pastel-Scales

I could fully see this happening 🦌♥️🐍


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3 months ago
Another Cowboy Commission! This Time With An Additional Cupid Theme; I Love That Razzle And Dazzle Are

Another cowboy commission! This time with an additional Cupid theme; I love that Razzle and Dazzle are Charlie’s little helpers ❤️ I clearly need to do a matching Vaggie now~


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4 months ago

Oh babydoll, no...

You Gotta Excuse His 1920's Ass, He's Still Learning Slangs

You gotta excuse his 1920's ass, he's still learning slangs


Tags
1 month ago

This machine kills AI

This Machine Kills AI

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misplaced-aquarius - Misplaced-Aquarius
Misplaced-Aquarius

A traditional/digital artist with a highly detailed etching/art nouveau style. Amnivert member of the alphabet mafia, 18+, mostly into horror and wholesomeness. Looking for art friends to do trades, challenges, and writing with. &gt;//3//&gt;

87 posts

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