Short Time Ago The Unfortunate Thought Came To Me That If By Some Chance Atsulucy For Canon, It Would

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Intro/my bio (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~

You can call me Mikayuu, Mikayuumouse (or some form of nickname from that username), Jinxo, or Solstice!

I go by she/her pronouns and I'm a straight female<3

I'm an artist (mostly traditional, slowly learning digital) and a fanfic writer so most of my posts will be about that and lots of things Bsd related 〜⁠(⁠꒪⁠꒳⁠꒪⁠)⁠〜

I'm an unhinged Sskk shipper, I love them both dearly and I will be dying on the hill of defending them, there's going to be lots of Sskk posts on my account :>

I'm inevitably cringe at times lmao but I'm just trying to have a fun, positive profile with no negativity, I'll try to be as polite as I can be to everyone<33

Other things besides Bsd that I'm into rn are; Taylor Swift (her music is wondrous), Over the Garden Wall, Supernatural, Monster High (G1), Jjba, HxH, and tgcf! And feel free to send me asks or anything lol, I absolutely love them :D

YOU FOOL. AWAY WITH YOU YOU FUCKING FOOL.

the way his eyes widen... ohh waking up from amnesia beacause of remembering your own death and how you said the same shit to your mortal enemy... this is peak fucking romance

i didnt think i could get more absolutely hyperfixated on this ship.. but never mind!!! haha.... hahaa......

i have my head in my hands. geniunely CANNOT do this anymore.

i just wanna talk a lil about the first panel... god atsushi looks stunning. the lidded eyes, the smirk/small smile............. how FOND he looks, how tired.. i literally need it tattooed on my soul. he knew it was a gamble, being cut down by amenogozen- but he still fucking did it for akutagawa, for the ada.. GOD I LOVE ATSUSHI

this is genuinely such a violently romantic-platonic gesture which is pretty on track for these fucking idiots.. but yeah excuse me while i go tweak out!!!!

I never miss a beat / I'm lightning on my feet

Technically a redraw of an official beast art that Harukawa did (you can find it in the beast light novel) but I altered it by kinda a lot

I'm fond of drawing Bsd characters in my style but for this specific art I thought it'd look better if I leaned more into Harukawa's original style<3 you can still see bits of my style peeking through lol

Atsushi's beast design though UGH IT'S SO GOOD

And yes the angel wings are supposed to look messy, in a contrast to how put together Atsushi himself looks, his white angel wings/his morals on the inside are messy and not as clean :D

where do you think sskk would go for their honeymoon?

honestly, I don't see sskk going somewhere for a honeymoon. they'd probably just each ask for a few weeks off of their work and spend as much time together as possible. their honeymoon is dragging each other around yokohama to go to their favorite restaurants and see gardens and walk alongside the pier and sleep in late. :)

OK correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like the main 'yin/yang' parallel with Atsushi and Akutagawa is not something like 'this one is bad but secretly has a good side and this one is good but secretly has a bad side'.

I feel like it's more about 'who they are at their core vs who they choose to be'.

At his core Akutagawa is kind and at his core Atsushi is not. But despite this Atsushi tries every day to make the kinder choices and I love him so much for it. He has to work so hard to be good.

He wants to be a bitch SO bad I know he does but he tries his best to help people and be nice (sometimes he fails but that's OK <3)

Atsushi doesn't always WANT to help people, a lot of the time he's selfish and scared, but he does help people anyway. He keeps helping people over and over again. There's still some selfish motivation to it, and his initial motivation for helping people was because the headmaster told him that's all he was worth, but overall he does care about the people he helps and it weighs on him if he fails to save them. And of course, as the series goes on he starts helping people more because he can rather than because he feels like he needs to.

In Akutagawa's case, he's still capable of being kind but his environment led him into being someone who chooses to hurt people. But he's always been a protector at heart. In the start he was bad compared to Atsushi because he was choosing to hurt people and keep the cycle of abuse going. Just like how Atsushi developed in why he saved people, Akutagawa starts to get redeemed when he chooses to not just act on his rage. Not only does he start to spare people, but he speaks more kindly to them (apologising to Higuchi and telling Kyouka he's proud of her). It all culminates into the moment he chooses to help Atsushi and sacrifice himself for him, going back to his core value of being a protector. Even when he's finally revived, he keeps this role in his new position as Aya's Knight.

I kind of see the streaks of white in Akutagawa and the streaks of black in Atsushi not as their 'hidden sides' but as their fundamental selfs. That's who they are at their core, and their main colours (black for Akutagawa and white for Atsushi) are how they're presented to everyone else and how they try to have people see them as.

Sskk bloodsucking scene in the manga

Sskk bloodsucking scene in the anime

my favorites pics of 'the eras tour' ♡

I HAVE AN ACRYLIC STAND I BOUGHT AT COMIC CON OF A SSKK ART LIKE THIS OML 😭

Dazai did this.

@mi1ikan Bsd analysations are scary but also amazing

Doing my usual "lets go back and read random BSD chapters" and I can't help but notice how different Fyodor is now to when he was first introduced.

I've made a few posts pointing out how Fyodor and Dazai have similar panels, but I'm starting to think he's actually mimicking Dazai's mannerisms on purpose now.

I don't have a lot of canon proof other than, ~a feeling~, I get looking at him, so consider this a headcanon rather than a theory.

Warning Manga spoilers under the cut!

Like, Fyodor, why does this keep happening??? Fyodor's versions of these poses also all happen later in the manga than Dazai's versions.

Now, there's the argument that Fyodor wasn't there for half of these, but we do know he's a hacker and he was obsessed with Dazai for a time. I do believe he would just sit there watching Dazai's movements on cameras to learn his patterns and habits in the name of defeating him.

Compare how he holds himself now, to how he did when he was first introduced.

He's a shut in who bites his nails, doesn't take care of his posture or appearance. He's so used to being behind the curtains he's off putting to be directly around.

Whereas Dazai is a chameleon, he blends in anywhere he goes. If I was an immortal so out of touch with my own humanity and basic identity, I probably pick someone to mimic their behaviours too.

Ironic that he choose the man who doesn't consider himself human to learn from.

I'm also drawn to this panel specifically.

(Very suspicious choice of words there, considering the current manga arc, but I digress)

Typically when we think of vampires, we think of blood sucking immortals, but the vampire we have in BSD is based of Dracula. Dracula specifically poses the question of "What if vampires stole who you are as well?". The idea that you can't consume someone's very life without having their soul linger on with you.

The Count learns to blend in with modern society through Johnathan, from learning from him and by feeding off him. Mina, Renfield and Lucy all slowly lose who they are the more influence the Count has over them.

This panel says he's soulless, he's 'empty', he's a vampire waiting to steal someone else's soul to fill him up. Now, that could be a hint at what his ability turned out to be, but it could also mean how he's mimicking Dazai.

But why mimic Dazai?

Well, simply put, he was the only one Fyodor saw as an equal and we know he wanted a companion who he considered to be his equal. So why not make himself more like the man he wants at his side. To obtain Dazai, he became Dazai.

Problem is Dazai hates himself, he also seems to dislike any character that's convinced they are the same. (Note: Not characters Dazai sees himself in, like Atsushi, but characters who insist to him that they are the same, like Mori and Fyodor)

It was a doomed plot from the start.

However, Dazai is no longer his goal. Atsushi is. Fyodor knows Atsushi greatly admires Dazai, so continuing to mimic Dazai's mannerisms to connect them together in Atsushi's mind could be part of his plan now.