:/

'we were totally not doing anything bad mom'

*pause* 'lets just not talk about it'

Having an eating disorder is far too goddamn fucking annoying. I'm either torn between starving myself until it hurts or eating because I know I'll just fail at starving.

oopsie daisy-J

i’m not doing bad enough to deserve or need help because i’m happy sometimes and i can usually function “normally”.

but i have cuts covering my arm and i’m eating badly.

but i shouldn’t be doing those things because i should be able to cope and i’m not doing that badly.

but i clearly can’t cope if i’m resulting to these negative coping mechanisms.

but i’m not like going to kms or anything.

but i wouldn’t be complaining if i didn’t wake up tomorrow.

I am staying hydrated, are You staying hydrated?

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I'm not so thrilled about living tbh

*dramatically looks up to show visible surprise at what you said*

it feels like everyone else is skinnier than me, is prettier than me, has better skin than me, dresses nicer than me, has a better home life than me, has more freedom than me, is better at doing stuff than me, has a cleaner space than me, is funnier than me, is more lovable than me, and is just overall better than me

i would seriously kill not to be me anymore bc no matter what i fix i’ll always be me and i fucking hate me

friendly reminders to self-harmers

Don't overuse antibiotics like neosporin, polysporin, etc, they can cause bacterial resistance and you'll be fucked if you get an actual infection. Use them only if a wound looks sketchy

Do NOT clean injured skin with alcohol or peroxide. Use them to disinfect anything that you have or are going to use to harm yourself (cutters, razor blades, etc) to avoid any funky stuff going into your body, use either a fragance free soap (doesn't have to be antiseptic or antibacterial but it's better if it is), iodine or another antiseptic meant for wounds to clean injured skin. Alcohol and peroxide can impede healing when used long term.

Never, and i mean never, use rusty stuff to harm yourself, things of dubious origins or dirty things. I dont care if you are vaccinated. There are ways to clean and disinfect stuff and get rid of rust.

You don't always need to cover you wounds (obviously if you dont feel comfortable not covering them because you don't want others noticing its okay!) if they're shallow but for deeper cuts (styros and deeper) you might want to, this way its easier for them to be in a sterile environment and stay moist, which minimizes scarring, promotes faster healing and prevents infection. If you want to cover your wounds change the dressing regularly and clean the wounds regularly.

Don't cut too deep if you aren't ready to go to an hospital. Some deep wounds ("beans" aka hypodermis/fat layer and anything under it) is likely to need stitches. For styros and some light beans you can do well with steri strips and bandages, but please go to an hospital if you cut very deep.

Finally:

Eat well and drink water (i know many people who sh have eds as well but your body cant repair itself well if you dont eat well)

Sleep well, also at night (because your body repairs itself better when you're sleeping during the night)

Moisturize your wounds often (preferrably vaseline for the first few days or as long as you can, after the first few days you can use a moisturizer that's apt for sensitive skin)

Dont shower too often (hot water can strip your skin of natural oils and also irritate it, so if you shower everyday with hot water try to do it every other day or shower with colder water)

Dont wear tight clothing on fresh wounds

CHANGE !! DRESSINGS !! REGULARLY !! AND DONT PICK ON SCABS!!!