He Is So 🫦😍🫦😍🫦😍🫦😍

"ᴀʟʟ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ꜱᴀʏ ɪꜱ ᴡᴇ ꜰᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ɪᴛ, ᴅᴜᴅᴇ. ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʜᴏᴡ ᴡᴇ’ʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ᴅᴇᴀᴅ ᴏʀ ɪɴ ᴊᴀɪʟ. ᴡᴇ ꜱʜɪᴛ ᴏɴ ᴀ ʟᴏᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅɪᴅ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ᴡᴇ ʀᴇɢʀᴇᴛ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴅᴀʏ." - The Dirt, 2019

⋆⭒˚｡⋆ a life full of regrets, still a life that's been lived. ⋆⭒˚｡⋆

🖕🏻

Burning Desire

warnings: smut (fingering in public)

“I drive fast, radio blares, have to touch myself to pretend you're there

Your hands were on my hips, your name is on my lips

Over over again, like my only prayer

(Come on tell me boy)”

-“Burning Desire” by Lana del Rey

I’ve been dating James for almost three years now, the most chaotic of my entire life, since he has been dealing with alcohol, drugs and his usual anger issues.

He had his days, we can say: days where he was more loving and passionate, and others where he wanted to be alone, just writing his music. Our relationship always been a roller coaster, mostly because of his mood. There were times when he wouldn’t call me for days, as it happened this week... he got so angry with me when I simply told him I had to hang out with one of my university's classmates to complete a project, so I couldn’t stay with him after his studio session with the band... I didn’t hear from him for five days, until he called me this morning, just before my literature class.

"Hello?", I asked still in a sleepy voice, rubbing my face with my left hand trying to wake up completely.

“Get ready, today you are with me."

James' deep voice filled my ears, making me jump.

"James? What-"

He doesn't even let me finish that he continues speaking in his low and warm tone.

"I'll be there in front of your university at 4pm, don't be late".

I couldn’t even find the words to reply, my mouth just slightly opened, and the words got stuck in my throat.

"I have an exam in a few days, James. I gotta study, I don't have time for-"

I try to explain him, but of course, he refused to let me finish a single sentence.

“You'll study at my place”, he simply says, I stay silent.

I couldn't believe it, he disappeared for almost a week and now all of a sudden he wanted me to hang out with him, or whatever it is.

“I’ll see you tonight", he continues, before hanging up, leaving me with the phone in my hand, clueless about where he wanted to take me tonight.

I spent the day, getting ready and packing some stuff to bring with me, including my books, knowing that I never used them when I'm at his place...

The time comes, I get out of my college room, waving at some friends in the hallway, walking towards the exit of the campus. That’s where I spot a tall, blonde long haired man, with dark sunglasses on, wearing a cowboy hat and covered in a tight total black outfit that exposed his muscular body, leaning against his Harley, luckily waiting for me.

I move closer, thinking that I had to act as cold as possible, after he disappeared, once again. I finally reach him, keeping my cool.

He grabs my bag without saying a word, throwing it on the ground next to him, before suddenly pulling me closer in a hungry, rough and passionate kiss, almost desperate.

His hands tight around my waist, before reaching for my hips, squeezing them.

My hands find his long hair, pulling it a bit, making him growl in the kiss, pressing me even closer to his body. I pull away exactly when I feel his hands reaching for my ass, I look up at him, and a smirk grows on his lips noticing my cheeks blushing, noticing some students around staring at us.

“You disappeared", I finally say, trying to be as cool as possible.

“I didn't have time to call you", he answered calmly, with a smirk stuck on his lips. “Yeah, sure", I scoff at his excuse, which he used for the past three months.

I look away, seeing that he was quietly amused by my behaviour.

"You mad at me?", he asks leaning a little bit trying to search for my sight again. I raise my shoulders in response, ignoring his question.

He chuckled at my attitude. “Of course you are", his tone was sarcastic this time, he knew I was mad at him and he enjoyed it.

"Come on, let’s go now."

He bends down to grab my bag that he dropped on the ground a few minutes ago, before reaching for his seat.

"Where do we have to go, James?", I ask him, in a cold tone.

"Music event tonight."

"What? I thought… I didn't bring anything for that. James I-", I was basically speechless, again...

“Hop on", he almost ordered me.

I do as he says, holding tight at his waist, before he loudly starts the engines.

Once we got at his place, the entire afternoon has been about complaining about getting ready, fix my school sleepy face, and most importantly, what I should wear.

I open the bag that I brought with me, where I just find causal clothes and books.

I walk towards the closet that I used during the weekends here at James'... and here we go. A few dresses and a pair of shoes that I probably wore twice, which I left here "just in case".

I quickly walk towards the bathroom to change myself and get ready for the night, spending almost an hour in there.

I could hear James' heavy steps on the other side of the door.

“Y/N?! You've been in there for an hour, are you ready now?"

His tone is heavy and deep, and definitely annoyed, he hated to wait for me this long. I ignore him and I open the door getting out of the bathroom still in my underwear, I walk for the closet to pick what to wear.

James looks at me with a smirk, his blue eyes glinting with amusement as he leans against the wall watching me rummage through the dresses.

"Still pissed, huh?" he asks, his deep voice cutting through the tension. He takes a swig of his beer from the bottle that he was holding in his hand.

“Pick something nice. We gotta look good tonight", he adds, his gaze roaming over my exposed curves appreciatively.

"I like that red one. The one you wore to that charity thing last year", he says, pointing with the bottleneck a crimson dress hanging in the closet. "It showed off your ass real nice", he exhaled through a grin.

"Fuck, you look hot in red."

He steps closer to me, placing his hand on the lower part of my back, pulling me close to him.

He leans in and starts kissing my neck, his mustache tickling my skin as he presses his lips against my bare skin.

"I missed you, ya know", he murmurs against my skin.

“Missed your tight little body. Missed fucking you", he growls lowly, making my entire body burn at that comment.

"Come on baby, get dressed. I wanna take my girl out tonight", he says before giving my ass a sharp smack.

"And don't keep me waiting.", he warns as he stepped back out of the room, leaving me to get ready.

James was already waiting by the car when I emerged from the house, his tall frame leaned casually against the black vehicle.

He straightened up as I approached, his eyes roamed over my body appreciatively. The dress hugged my curves in all the right places, the hem stopping mid-thigh to show off my toned legs. His gaze lingered on the plunging neckline that revealed a tantalizing peek of my cleavage.

He stepped forward and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close to him. His other hand reached up to tilt my chin, his calloused thumb brushing over her lower lip.

"Fuck, you're gorgeous.", he murmured, his voice low and rough with desire. "Gonna be the hottest chick there tonight," he said, his eyes darkening as he leaned in closer. "And all mine.” He growled possessively before capturing my lips in a searing kiss, his tongue delving into my mouth to claim me thoroughly.

After a long moment, he pulled back, leaving me breathless.

He opened the car door for me, ushering me inside the luxurious interior before sliding in himself. As we pulled out of the driveway, he reached over to rest his hand high up my thigh, his pinky finger teasing the hem of my dress.

As we arrived at the event, a flurry of flashbulbs erupted around us as photographers eagerly snapped pictures of James, while he kept me close, his arm wrapped protectively around my waist as he guided me through the crowd and into the venue.

Inside, the atmosphere was electric, with people from all walks of life mingling and celebrating the power of music. His demeanor shifting from the possessive lover to the charismatic rockstar. He introduced me to various industry professionals, his hand never leaving my back.

As the night went on, James stayed close to me, his eyes rarely leaving me. He made sure to keep my glass full for the whole night. Whenever a man approached me, he would step in, inserting himself into the conversation and making it clear I was off-limits.

The time for the awards has come, I sit next to him and his band in front of the stage where they will perform and eventually receive their awards.

His hand resting on my bare leg,

squeezing it a little bit, while my fingers rubbed his big arm.

As the lights dim down, I decide to move closer to him, playing the little game he loves the most.

“You know… you treated me awfully this week.”

I whisper in his ear sensually, he turns to look at me, amused by my tone.

“Mhm? I’m sorry then.”

A smirk appears on his face, his tongue licks his lips when his sight locks with mine.

“Yeah, you should be.”, I say moving back on my seat.

“Should I?”, he continues lowering his voice as soon as someone on the stage started speaking.

“Yes…”, he moves closer, his large fingers slowly lifting up my dress, reaching for the inside of thigh.

My breath got stuck in my throat.

“You’ll be this mad the entire night then?”, he whispers in my ear, his breath caressing my soft neck skin.

“Probably… maybe you can change my mind, you should try.”

I provoke him, I could tell that he loved it. While he kissed my jawline, his fingers start tracing little circles on my skin moving, closer and closer to the lace of my panties.

“Maybe like this?…”, he quietly asks, making me breathe heavily at his touch after I didn’t feel it since almost a week ago. I could feel his fingers moving my panties on the side, finally touching me. I gasp of the feeling his bare hands on me, his touch moves closer to my clit, rubbing it softly.

“You missed this, didn’t you?”, he asks, making me nod desperately, I couldn’t say anything, I could just bite my lip. I was already breathless, and overwhelmed about the context, the people around us, James next to me and his hand between my legs.

“You touched yourself like this during these days without me, didn’t you?”

His heavy tone was so turned on that the movements on my clit worked faster, making me escape a low moan.

“Answer me, baby.”, he demanded.

“Yes…” I reply, almost in a whisper.

“Good girl.”

He smirks, knowing damn well I always do it thinking about him.

After placing another small kiss on my neck, his hand moves back a little bit, before suddenly sliding two fingers in my already wet walls.

I moan trying to keep it as quiet as I can. With his other hand, he fixes the erection in his pants, without drawing the attention of his bandmates sitting on his left.

I turned to face him, pressing a weak kiss on his lips.

“Keep going James… please”, I begged him, biting my lips, my eyes slightly closed as I felt the motion of his fingers grow faster, pressing deeper inside of me, while he kept rubbing my clit with his thumb.

“Come for me baby, come for me.”, he whispers before biting my earlobe. I kept my moans low as he spoke with his hot voice, sensual and full of passion.

The moment that he curls his strong two fingers deeper inside me, faster and harder, my throbbing walls started tightening around them, he kisses me again to block the loud moan that was escaping my mouth, pressing his tongue deep in my mouth, intertwining with mine, as I reached the climax of pleasure.

He slowly moves away, a grin on his lips. Moving away from my core, caressing one more time my trembling legs, he reached for his mouth, sucking the fingers that were earlier inside of me, tasting them.

Before he got announced on the stage with his band he turned to look at me one more time, whispering in a cocky smile.

“Am I forgiven now?”

hello!! welcome to my blog!! i finally decided to open one. this is my first one shot, i hope you like it!

-mel

so… i was sleeping when my best friend called me telling me that metallica will be back in italy on june 3. 2k26… now i can’t sleep anymore🤪

pray for me that my mom will buy me the tickets.

can’t wait!!!!!

how i used to comunicate during my university exams session:

fifty shades of red

Love Me Harder

An amazing collaboration with @metallicames !! ❥

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Description: 1991, You and James are friends with benefits, but you knew each other since you were in high school and since then you’ve been inseparable… but lately, during James’ last tour something changed, making you doubt about your special friendship, or so you thought until that night…

Warnings: smut, angst, unprotected sex, fingering

*. ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

“Cause if you want to keep me

You gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta got to love me harder

And if you really need me

You gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta got to love me harder

Gotta love me harder”

-“Love me harder”, by Ariana Grande & The Weeknd

*. ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Being James Hetfield's friend with benefits has never been easy, it's actually like being on a roller coaster: you never know what might happen, what mood he'll be in, or when you'll see him next.

I haven’t heard from him in days… he was having some gigs with his band around the country, he promised to call me so he could tell me how his tour was going but the last call was two weeks ago by now. We’ve been friends since we were in high school and talking to each other about our lives always been a habit, but now that his career became bigger he changed: the alcohol his destroying him but he doesn’t seem to care, but I do…

I was having my work break during my night shift, while he was probably getting ready for another show, I couldn’t help and decided to call his hotel. A lady answers my call before sending it to James’ room; I heard him answering the phone “Yeah?” I could identify his drunk and probably high voice through the speaker “James, it’s me Y/N…” he sighed heavily hearing my voice “…you didn’t call, I wanted to know if you are doing okay” my voice was low, I felt like he didn’t want to hear me.

James sighed heavily into the phone again, his words slurred slightly as he spoke."Fuck, Y/N... I've been busy, alright? Shit's been crazy with the tour and all..."

He took a long swig of his beer, the sound of liquid glugging echoed through the receiver. James grimaced slightly at the bitter taste, but continued to drink nevertheless. “I figured, but I was worried about you, that’s all…” I tried to be more sensitive as possible trying to bring him back to reality noticing that he wasn’t sober.

"Look, I ain't got time for this fuckin' heart-to-heart bullshit right now, ya know? I got a fuckin' show to play in like, an hour..." he never been this cold with me, the previous years was always euphoric to tell me about his tour, but this time is different. “James I just-“

James's voice dropped to a low, irritated murmur. "I'm fine, 'kay? Just fuckin' alright here. Stop worryin' about me like I'm some fuckin' damsel in distress or somethin'..."

He letted out another exasperated sigh, running a hand through his long, dirty blonde hair. "I'll call ya when I get back, 'kay? Now quit bein' such a fuckin' girl about this shit..."

Without waiting for a response, James slammed the phone down, cutting me off mid-sentence. I was speechless, hurt, that wasn’t the James that I used to know… I waited for a call that night and the days after and it never came.

Today, a few weeks later after our last talk I had the worst day at work, after replacing my colleague’s shift that lasted four hours more then my usual, I came back home exhausted, with the only thought of sleeping and finally relaxing with the thunders and rain sounds through the windows hoping to finally stop overthinking about him; After a few hours the storm wakes me from a restless sleep. Thunder shaking the windows, and the rain lashing against the glass like a fist. I turn over in bed, trying to reclaim the warmth of dreams, when the intercom ring sharp and insistent, cutting through the night like a blade.

I glance at the clock: 3:20 a.m.

Disoriented, I stumble toward the intercom. “Who is it?”

“It’s me...” The voice is low, hoarse, heavy with something unspoken. “James.”

It takes me a moment to believe it. “James? What… what are you doing here?”

“I’m sorry. Can I come up?”

I don’t hesitate. I press the button and unlock the door. I wait in the doorway, pulling the thin fabric of my sleep shirt tighter around me. When I see him climb the stairs, my breath stops.

He is soaked to the bone, rainwater dripping from his hair, his clothes clinging to his body. His eyes are unfocused, his steps unsteady, i can tell he'd been drinking. But there is something else too: a desperation clinging to him like the storm itself.

“Are you insane?” I whisper, pulling him inside. “You’ll catch your death out there.”

He doesn’t answer. He just stay there, eyes locked on mine with an intensity that make me forget the cold. I peele his wet jacket off him, and the heat of his body surprises me, he feels feverish, trembling. Then he steps closer, and before I could speak, his hands are on my face, and his mouth crashes into mine.

It ain’t a kiss. It’s a plea.

And I answer it.

We kiss like we are trying to drown in each other. There is no space, no air, only heat and hunger. We stumble through the hallway, shedding wet clothes as we keep walking, lips never parting for long. My back hits the bedroom door, and we fall onto the bed, still tangled in half-removed shirts, his hands roaming, urgent and rough, like he needed to feel every inch of me to believe I am real. James's breath comes in harsh, ragged gasps as he hovers over me, his blue eyes dark and intense in the low light. He can feel the heat radiating off my skin, the soft curves of my body beneath his trembling hands. The alcohol coursing through his veins only amplified his desperate need to lose himself in me, to forget the chaos and darkness that haunted his every waking moment.

He captures my lips again in a bruising kiss, his tongue delving deep into my mouth, tasting me, claiming me. One hand tangles in my hair, gripping it tightly as he angles my head to deepen the kiss, while the other hand slides down the smooth column of my throat, feeling my pulse jump beneath his touch.

James's hips ground against mine, the evidence of his arousal pressing insistently against my core. He needs me, needs to be inside of me, needs to feel something real. The world outside this room fades away, the storm still raging but now nothing more than a distant hum, a muffled soundtrack to our desperate coupling.

He breaks the kiss with a harsh gasp, his forehead falling to rest against mine as he struggles to catch his breath. His voice is a low, ragged whisper when he spoke, his words hot against my lips. “I need you. I need to feel you. Now..."

James's hands roamed my body with a desperate, almost frantic hunger, calloused fingers skimming over the soft curves of my breasts, my stomach, my hips. He pushes my shirt up and off, tossing it carelessly to the side, before leaning down to take one hardened nipple into his mouth, sucking and biting at the sensitive flesh until I cry out in pleasure-pain.

His other hand slides between my thighs, roughly pushing my panties aside to delve into the slick heat of my core. He groans against my breast when he feels how wet I am, two fingers plunging deep inside of me, pumping in and out of my tight channel.

I can feel every inch of him, hard and heavy against my thigh as he looms over me, his hips rocking forward, seeking friction. With a low curse, he takes off his own shirt, revealing the lean, muscular expanse of his chest, the light dusting of hair glistening with rainwater and sweat.

James kicks off his jeans, leaving him bare and exposed, his thick hard cock ready to be used. He settles between my thighs, the head of his erection nudging against my entrance, and with one hard thrust of his hips, he buries himself to the hilt inside of me.

I gasp at the sudden intrusion, my back arching off the bed as I adjust to the feeling of him stretching me wide, filling me so completely. He set a fast, almost punishing pace, the headboard slamming against the wall with each powerful thrust of his hips.

One hand grips my hip hard enough to leave bruises, holding me in place as he takes his pleasure from my body. The other hand slides beneath my ass, tilting my hips up to meet each driving thrust. The obscene sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room, mingling with our harsh pants and moans.

The storm outside rage, but it only echoes the storm between us the frantic rhythm of skin on skin, the harsh gasps, the sound of the bed creaking beneath the weight of something more than lust.

He is above me, inside me, and I clung to him as if letting go would shatter something irreparable. There is no space for thought only the relentless surge of his hips, the grip of his hands on my thighs, the heat building between us like fire under wet wood.

And then, in the middle of it all in the middle of the madness I hear it. A breath, a tremor.

“I love you.”

I freeze.

My body doesn’t stop, but something inside me does, like the world is slipping sideways. My fingers grip his shoulders. My voice is barely audible, a thread of disbelief.

“What?” I whisper, not daring to believe what I just heard. “James… what did you say?”

He slows down, just enough to meet my eyes. His own are dark, wet not only for alcohol anymore, but something deeper. He holds my gaze and say it again, slower this time, with a clarity that cut through me.

“I love you.”

The words hung there, raw and exposed, heavier than anything else in the room. My chest hurts. Everything in me screams to me to hold on and to run at the same time.

But I don’t move. I reach up, tangle my fingers in his damp hair, and kiss him like it is the first time and maybe the last.

As James's hips stilled, buried deep inside of me, I can feel his cock pulsing and throbbing, hot seed spurting in thick ropes to paint my insides. The sensation of his release triggers my own, and I come with a sharp cry, my inner walls clenching and fluttering around him, milking every last drop of his essence.

My orgasm crashes over me like a tidal wave, I gasp beneath him, back bowed, fingers clawing at his shoulders as I ride out the intense pleasure, wave after wave of bliss consuming me.

James groans low in his throat, hips grinding against mine as he prolongs both our peaks. He can feel me coming undone around him, my silken walls gripping his sensitive flesh like a vise. It is almost too much, the intensity of it, the raw, primal connection.

Even as the aftershocks begin to subside, James doesn’t pull away. He collapses against me, his weight pressing me into the mattress, his face buries in the crook of my neck. Our chests heavy together, sweat-slicked skin sliding against sweat-slicked skin, as we struggle to catch our breath.

The air between us is thick with the musky scent of sex and the weight of unspoken emotions.

This night ain’t just a mistake or a relapse. It ain’t just sex. We cling to each other like the storm outside might swallow us whole. And even though fear grips my chest the fear that tomorrow he’d disappear again, that morning light would erase all of this I let myself believe, just for that night.

In this moment, I am his. Entirely. And for the first time, it feels like he is mine too.

The harsh light of morning pierces through the curtains, falling across the tangled sheets and naked limbs of our spent bodies. I wake up first, blinking away the remnants of sleep, taking in the sight of James's face on the pillow beside me. His features are relaxed in slumber, the usual tension gone, leaving him looking almost boyish. Almost vulnerable.

I glance down at our bodies, still entwined, the sheet kicked down to our waists. The room is a mess, clothes strewn haphazardly across the floor, the air thick with the scent of sex and the faint aroma of alcohol still clinging to James's skin.

I softly stand up from the bed trying to not wake him up, collecting a top and pair of shorts heading towards the kitchen.

As I reach for a mug from the cabinet, I hear footsteps behind me. I turn to see James, still naked except for a pair of boxers. His hair is disheveled, falling in loose waves around his face.

He pauses in the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his bare chest. His eyes, still heavy from sleep.

I can see him swallow hard, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat, as he meets my gaze. The air between us feels charged, the silence heavy with the weight of last night's passion and the unspoken words left lingering on our tongues.

James remains quiet, his expression guarded, as he studies me. It is clear that he is still processing, still trying to reconcile the events of the night with the harsh light of day. “Morning…” I say breaking the awkward silence between us “…you want something for breakfast?” I ask him again trying to keep it cool but inside me I am screaming thinking about what he told me last night, I know he wasn’t completely sober but he wasn’t drunk of course, maybe those three words were actually true… “Just gimme a beer” he says, I stop what I was doing before looking at him with a disappointed expression before seeing him laughing “I’m playing with ya’… a coffee would be perfect” I sigh at his joke before preparing everything for both of us.

“Here you go” I say giving him the mug. The silence is deep, again, my thoughts are killing me from the inside while I keep thinking about everything that we had hours before, I can’t take this anymore “James…” I start keeping my eyes focused on my coffee “Mh?” He simply replies making things more difficult for me “About last night… uhm… Were you serious?” I spit out nervously “About what?” He asks leaning down on the chair “About what you told to me…” he doesn’t say anything, he probably knows but he doesn’t want to touch the topic “Listen Y/N, whatever I said that wasn’t the right moment, I was probably too much turned on my the moment and-“ I know him, I know him too well “So you remember…” he freezes “why you playing this shit with me James?” That’s enough he can’t treat me like one of his tour girls I’m not like them and he knows it “I’m not playing with you, I’m just-“ he tries to justify himself “You are what? What’s your goal of being this distant with me? We’ve been best friends for years and now you are acting like a total dick: you disappear, then you come here, you fuck me saying that you love me, then you deny everything! What do you want from me?!” I snap, standing up from the chair, hands in my hair, I go back to my bedroom trying to stay calm starting to feel my eyes filling with tears, I was ready to tell him that his feelings are the same that were hunting me since he left for the tour, but now I’m regretting everything.

I lay down on the bed for a few minutes before feeling the mattress moving behind me, a hand gripping my waist. James’ mustache rubbing my skin while he places a soft kiss on it “I’m sorry for being such a dick sometimes” he says softly “You are always a dick James” I say making him escape a little laugh “I meant everything that I said yesterday night…” he finally admits; my heart starts to beat faster at his words “…Never been a moment where I didn’t think about you when I was with the band. But I was too scared about this feeling that I lost myself with the alcohol…” he sounds so miserable, vulnerable but he finally opens to me “I love you too James…”I turn around to look at him, his blue eyes studying me, I could see his happiness in them thanks to my words “ya’ do?” He asks “yes… but promise me you will let me help you to deal with your emotions and these alcohol problems” he smiles softly at my words, placing a kiss on my lips “I want you to help me Y/N, you are the only one that can do that”.

*. ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

-mel & ally