Cats Are SUPPOSED To Stay Inside, Because It's Safer For Them And The Wildlife So Don't Listen To Anyone

Can you imagine Remus trying for hours to create a perfectly normal animal for Patton for his birthday but he's running out of time so like

Remus: *pops up, holding creature*

Roman: *immediately draws sword* Are you trying to KI—

Remus: No! No, no, it's not a cat.

Creature: *looks exactly like a cat*

Remus: Well, not really. See, I made it look like a cat, cuz Patton loves cats, but he's allergic. So it's not really a cat.

Roman: *half-lowers sword* How do we know you're telling the truth?

Remus: Um... If I was trying to be evil, I'd do it much more bluntly?

Roman: *sheaths sword* That's true.

Patton, looking at the creature: Aw, kiddo, it's so cute! Does it have a name?

Remus: Um, no, I thought I'd let you name it. If— if you want it.

Patton: Of course I do! Aw, that's so sweet of you.

Remus: *hands creature to Patton* Just be kinda careful, I'm still new to making normal creatures, so it might be a bit—

Creature: *starts to yawn, as it's mouth gets widest it breaths a spiral of fire, closes its mouth and does a little mlem at the end*

Remus: ...odd.

Everyone: *carefully watching Patton's reaction*

Patton: Kiddo...

Patton: ...I LOVE IT! Oh my goodness!

Patton, scratching the creature's stomach, in a baby-voice: Who's the cutest little not-kitty? You are! Who's my cute little fire-breathing-cat-lookalike? You are!

Remus, softly: *eyes tearing up* He likes it.

Roman: *solemnly sets hand on his shoulder* You did good. You're making us proud as a club member.

Remus: *sniffle* I like this club.

Patterns: cut

Colors: matched

Bois: pinned together

Reference boi: ready

Special eyes for the special boi: Ready

I am not going to simp for a fanon adaptation of an aspect of Thomas Sander's personality, I am not going to simp for a fanon adaptation of an aspect of Thomas Sander's personality, I am not going to simp for a fanon adaptation of an aspect of Thomas Sander's personality, I am not going to simp for a fanon adaptation of an aspect of Thomas Sander's personality, I am not— FUCK I'M SIMPING FOR A FANON ADAPTATION OF AN ASPECT OF THOMAS SANDERS'S PERSONALITY

You Can Do Nice Things For "Selfish" Reasons.

Doing something nice for a "selfish" or self-serving reason doesn't cancel out the fact that you did a nice thing. Unless you tell them, nobody knows your motivation behind doing the nice thing.

It makes no difference to them.

Bring home-baked goods to a gathering so people compliment your food and tell you how incredible at baking you are. Donate to charity to impress people. Smile and be kind and polite so people like you. Compliment people in the hopes they'll compliment you back. Help someone pick up their things because it makes you feel like the main character. Let a stressed parent with crying children cut ahead of you in line because you just want the loud kids to be gone as soon as possible.

People don't know why you did it.

People do know what you did.

People know you brought home-baked goods to a gathering. Charity got a donation. People know you were smiling and kind and polite to them. People know they got a compliment. People know someone helped them pick up their things. The parent knows you did a kind thing for them.

Whether you do it selflessly or self-servingly, your action doesn't change, nor does its impact.

Not doing nice things because you "just want something in return so it's selfish" is worse than doing nice things for self-serving reasons.

Putting good vibes out into the world because you want to pretend you're a dashing and chivalrous young lad whose wealthy family tragically passed leaving you to inherit the mysterious family mansion and all the men admire you and all the ladies talk about what an honest, good young man you are and all the nonbinaries get gender envy from you and the unlabeled and agender folks just think you're really cool and everyone attracted to men fancies you is good and harmless and fun.

You can other peoples' days and your own day better simultaneously. So do it.

Logan, needing to decide something: Hey, do you have a quarter or something I can flip?

Roman, checking pockets: Hm... I have D&D dice, if that would work?

Logan:

Logan: Wh—

Logan:

Logan, giving up wondering: Yeah that works. Thanks.

Sometimes I fuck myself up thinking about how on the DSMP Technoblade became Ranboo's sensei, and then became (jokingly) distraught because the sensei always dies, and how in real life Ranboo wears the crown because viewers said they sounded like Techno and they said "if the crown fits, wear it" and then the two became friends, with Techno being an experienced streamer/youtuber and Ranboo being extremely new

And then, y'know

The sensei always dies

Also, c!Wilbur's mother is a fridge and yet it was surprising when he had a fox-child with a salmon. Like. We should have expected it tbh

C!Fundy's grandmother is a fridge and mother is a salmon. That's all that's the post

A fic in which the 'it was all a dream' is the beginning of the story

I’m so tired of this. Logan rubbed his eyes, sighing. No matter how much research he did, he wasn't listened to.

He got up, leaving his ‘room,’ heading down the mind palace’s staircase to get himself water.

“Logan, watch out!” he heard a distant voice yell, and before he knew it, he’d tripped, tumbling down the steps before his world went dark.

–

“Mm?”

“Oh my god, Logan, are you alright?” he heard Virgil's voice ask him anxiously.

His body… hurt. He blinked, trying to remember what had happened. “Why am I experiencing pain?”

“You got hit by a car. I— I tried to warn you, but it was too late. Luckily you didn't break anything.”

He rubbed his eyes, sitting up. He was in a hospital room. He looked over at Virgil, blinking. “You look different.”

Nobody Asked, But If I Could Say One Thing To Each Of The Sides, They'd Be:

Roman: We appreciate you. Not everything you make has to be the work of Adam (Driver). It's okay to mess up. You aren't just Thomas's hero; you're the hero of a lot of fans too.

Orange: TBD. (Right now, 'Come out, come out, wherever you are!')

Janus: Thank you. Also, I think your name is awesome.

Remus: You aren't evil. You're just as important as the other sides.

Patton: It's okay to say 'I don't know.' You aren't supposed to have all the answers. You aren't letting anyone down.

Logan: I listen when you're talking, and I learn from you, and I know a lot of other fans do. You can show your emotions, we know you have them. We'll always take you seriously.

Virgil: We love you. You've never been the villain— you've always been looking out for Thomas's safety.

(I know some of them aren't really 'one thing' shh)

(I know Remus is as important as everyone else because @thatsthat24 doesn't make one-dimensional sides. All the sides are like onions: they have several layers and once they're revealed you usually start crying)

Believe It Or Not, Deceit Is Good At His Job

Let's ignore that Janus is mostly self-preservation at this point rather than 'Deceit'

Everyone seems to think Janus is a really bad liar. For example: when he imitated Logan, he wore the wrong tie, said 'lies,' and used an idiom.

But then when Virgil showed up, he snapped at him for 'ruining his dramatic entrance.' He totally expected them to figure him out. He planned it, because he's too Extra to just show up as himself.

More proof:

Selfishness vs Selflessness redux. Nobody knew he'd replaced Logan until he told them. He had them completely fooled, as well as the majority of the viewers, I'm sure.

Selfishness vs Selflessness. Yeah, we all knew Patton was off, but how many of us actually figured out it wasn't Patton?

Virgil knew, because he knows both Patton and Janus seemingly well, but considering the Janus/Virgil dynamic, I am near certain he did that on purpose.

Would Patton have messed up referencing famous philosophers? Yes. Did Janus know that? Most likely. However, his knowledge impressed Logan, and Janus wanted the other sides to take his side. He probably figured if he got Logic on his side everyone else would follow but then realized how little they listen to Logic.

Every bit he did that wasn't exactly Patton-like, I am certain there was a clear, intentional reason behind it, even if it was just to annoy Virgil by letting him be even more sure it was actually Janus. 'Friendo'? Come on. Patton's literally the dad character. There's no way that wasn't intentional.

"Is C!Thomas capable of such deception?" you ask, because he is a bean.

Yes. No, C!Thomas doesn't lie on a regular basis or anything. But he. Is. An. Actor. Actors can lie. They can deceive.

Just because he only does it on the stage, doesn't mean his sides can't use that skill whenever. I also believe his skills in acting have a lot to do with Janus in addition to the Creativitwins but that's for another time

In conclusion: Janus can lie.