Remus, Nervous: Hey, Uh... I Drew Thomas...

THANK YOU! Now I need to load up Tumblr on a computer XD

Edit: I did!

Sides: *eating breakfast together*

School bus: *drives past*

Remus: *sees that it's empty*

Remus: This bus empty,

Remus, miming jerking a steering wheel to the side: SKEET

Remus: *continues eating breakfast*

Patton, the only one not used to this: ???

More beans: Acquired!

Patterns: cut

Colors: matched

Bois: pinned together

Reference boi: ready

Special eyes for the special boi: Ready

Sometimes I fuck myself up thinking about how on the DSMP Technoblade became Ranboo's sensei, and then became (jokingly) distraught because the sensei always dies, and how in real life Ranboo wears the crown because viewers said they sounded like Techno and they said "if the crown fits, wear it" and then the two became friends, with Techno being an experienced streamer/youtuber and Ranboo being extremely new

And then, y'know

The sensei always dies

Roman, bursting into Logan's room in the middle of the night, sword raised: WHO IS ROBERTO AND WHERE DID HE COME FROM AND WHAT DOES HE WANT WITH PADRE?!

Logan, sleepily: He's the frog that lives in your head. G'night.

Roman, lowering sword: Oh, okay.

Roman:

Roman: waIT HE'S THE WHAT—

Remus and Logan: *playing Hell Chess*

Patton and Janus: *teleport in*

Janus: LOGAN! Tell Patton he does not have birds in his head!

Patton: Logan!! Tell Janus he doesn't know everything!

Logan, raising an eyebrow: What?

Patton: So, whenever my doctor examines my ears, these little birds tweet! He says I have a little family of birds living in my head!

Janus: Correction, to make Patton sit still during checkups, his doctor makes bird noises and pretends to check on birds in his head instead of his ears.

Patton: Hey, I'm perfectly still! I don't want him to poke a bird!

Janus: *gestures wildly at him*

Logan, completely serious: Oh, no, I'm afraid you're wrong here, Janus. I've seen Patton's medical records, he has a small family of birds living in his head and has for years. It's a harmless condition.

Janus: *stares at him in WTF manner*

Patton: Ha! I told you! Devon and his family ARE in my head!

Remus: What's in my head?

Logan, no hesitation: A single rat on a wheel. His name is Maurice.

Remus: Is he a space cowboy?

Logan: And a gangster of love.

Remus, grinning: Cool.

Patton: Ooh! What's in Roman's head?

Logan, also no hesitation: A frog named Roberto.

Patton: Awesome! I'm going to tell him.

Patton: *sinks out*

Janus: WHY.

Logan, smiling mischievously: You've got a transgendeer in yours.

Janus: MOTHERF—

Virgil: This is not children's television. I am 26, I'm depressed, and I need edgy jokes to cope with my anxiety.

Y'all ever read a really good fic and lie on your bed making that squeal/whine noise in the back of your throat hugging a pillow while tears in the corners of your eyes dry because oh god it was so good and

ehnneeennhheennneee

SCREECH

WTIT SPOILERS

(NEWEST SANDERS ASIDES SPOILERS)

Oh my GOD so

1. Someone FINALLY recognized that as a part of Thomas, Remus has to have importance!!!

2. Real life Nico!!

3. Logan dumping out his coffee and replacing it with wine? ICONIC

4. HIS EYES! We were all right!!! I think!! Logan's gonna get mad and go dark so Thomas pays attention to him and become the orange side!! I literally made Logan's eyes orange in one of my dark side Logan aus! And he's definitely a dark side because of Remus's 'now you're speaking my language'!!

5. The end! Virgil chilling in the roots of a tree, Janus, the snake with the apple, up in the branches, assuring that 'everything is just fine'

6. Logan trying to understand the others while they constantly brush him off!!

7. The orange eyes at the very end!!

8. REMUS AND LOGAN CONTENT!!!

9. ALL THE SIDES TOGETHER IN ONE EPISODE!

10. ORANGE SIDE CONTENT

11. REALLY GOOD ADVICE FOR DEALING WITH INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS THAT I REALLY NEEDED RIGHT NOW

12. SHOWING REMUS'S WORK PROCESS

13. REMUS BEING ALLERGIC TO S O A P

14. THE ENTIRE THING

15. AHHHHHHHHHHHH

̴̨̨̨̜͓̟͍̮̰̠͖̜̦̙̗̤̯̱͓̠̠͍̙̞͈̯̼̭̥͇͓͍̲̌̔́̍̐͐̌̆͒̌̇͗̔̿̀͑͋̃̌͛̓̈̿̈́̆̓̓̓̌͑͊̚͠ͅͅA̶̧̡̛̛͖͇̟͚͉̟̯̙̎̑̈́̌̈̔̽͊͋̌̅͐̕͘ͅḨ̴̛̦̗͚͚̩̮͙̬͊̽͋͌͗̄͐̅͋̏̀́̐̋̊̈̈́͗̏̃͑͂̔͂̓̀̈̓̈́̕̕̚̕͜͝͝ͅḨ̸̢̛̲͇̹͔͉̦̮͚̱͖̹͓̱̻̣̼̤̣͚̳̣̂̈́̎̈́̓̎̅͌̇̒̾͒̃̒̍̿̚̚͜͜͜͝H̸̜͎̺͆̓́̈́́͛Ḩ̴̡̛̟̗̩͚̣̝͓̹̣̤̟̞̯̯̠͓̰͕̣̜̺͈͔̺͈͔͈̭̟̈́́͑̿͒̍͗̌͋̒̉͌͐̽̽͌̔́͛͆̈͆̈́̈̈́͛́͋̕͘̚̕͜͝͝ͅH̶͎̰̦̠̤̯͖̠͓̩͎̿̓̔͊̓͆͛͘Ḣ̴̢͚̬͇̼͍̗͔̞̘͖̝͚̝͎̥̟̠̜̜̙̞̤̩̦͙͉̭̥̯̺͚̭͎̹͙͎̖̰͇̈̓͋H̸̛͚̽̒̀̊͆̑̋̓̈́̽̎̂͌͐͌̔̋̎̀̄̐̏͐͛̋̈́͒͗̆̈́̑̍͘͝͝Ḫ̸̢̢̛̛̩̹̰̞̹͕͕̪͍̟̩̗̠̯͉̳̯͕̝͐̊͐̏̈́́̇̂̈́̑̓͋̓̋̐͂͐̔͛̚̕̕̚͜͝͠͠͝ͅH̸̘͓̠͖̰̪͌̎H̵̢̨̥̠͖̬̦̭̙͉͙̜̋̆́̏̓̓̍̽̄̒͜H̸̰͕̹͕͊̉͐̈́͐̋̇̈́̃͝͠H̵̢̧̥̺̩̻͎̮̣̖̳͍͎̻͇̻̭͚͚̯̦̅̾̀͜͜ͅH̶̢̡̡̧͉̼͚̘̫͕̺̹̹̻̝̼̦͍͕͇̞̱̳̤̖̗͍͇̗̦͍̃̓͆̾̂̂̋̾̀̌̽̓͒͑͛̾͒̀̚̕͘̕ͅͅͅͅͅḨ̵̧̡̛̮̤͙͖̖̗̘͈̪̰̞̙͇̥̹̣͕̠̲̠̤̣͇̈́̾̔̏̅͂̈̀͌͌̈̿̽͋͆̔̈̏̄͗̀͆̂̚̚͘͠͝ ̴̧̡̢̟͈̭͖̭̪͉̥̳̞͙̞͙͉̯̻̟̼͙͈̝̻̣̱̱̍͜ ̵̡̧̟̺̟̫̰͓͙͎̼̲̗̤̭͔̼̤̻͕͔͚͛̈̐̑̇͊͊̏͋̊͘

Logan, on the phone: Oh, no, it's no problem....Alright, thank you so much for your help!...Thanks so much! Have a great day!

Logan: *ends call*

Logan, throwing his phone across the room: THOSE MOTHERFU—

Remus, watching this go down: Well, mark me down as scared and horny.

Janus, rolling his eyes: Can you even tell the difference between the two at this point?

Remus: No.

You Can Do Nice Things For "Selfish" Reasons.

Doing something nice for a "selfish" or self-serving reason doesn't cancel out the fact that you did a nice thing. Unless you tell them, nobody knows your motivation behind doing the nice thing.

It makes no difference to them.

Bring home-baked goods to a gathering so people compliment your food and tell you how incredible at baking you are. Donate to charity to impress people. Smile and be kind and polite so people like you. Compliment people in the hopes they'll compliment you back. Help someone pick up their things because it makes you feel like the main character. Let a stressed parent with crying children cut ahead of you in line because you just want the loud kids to be gone as soon as possible.

People don't know why you did it.

People do know what you did.

People know you brought home-baked goods to a gathering. Charity got a donation. People know you were smiling and kind and polite to them. People know they got a compliment. People know someone helped them pick up their things. The parent knows you did a kind thing for them.

Whether you do it selflessly or self-servingly, your action doesn't change, nor does its impact.

Not doing nice things because you "just want something in return so it's selfish" is worse than doing nice things for self-serving reasons.

Putting good vibes out into the world because you want to pretend you're a dashing and chivalrous young lad whose wealthy family tragically passed leaving you to inherit the mysterious family mansion and all the men admire you and all the ladies talk about what an honest, good young man you are and all the nonbinaries get gender envy from you and the unlabeled and agender folks just think you're really cool and everyone attracted to men fancies you is good and harmless and fun.

You can other peoples' days and your own day better simultaneously. So do it.

Everyone reblogging this with some variation of 'poly pat' is so intensely valid

Good morning! I'd just like to point out:

[Patton]: First, we'll need someone to practice on...

[Logan]: But who?

[Patton]: Each other?

(After they all swear to tell the truth during the trial scene and Janus takes the bibles/misc objects back away)

[Patton]: Okay, so, we kiss now? Or...?

Bonus:

[Patton]: Aww, there's so much cool stuff they've done for us online, kiddos!

[Roman]: Oh yeah?

[Patton]: There's some really neato artwork of us all AND some writing as well! Say, what is a "ship"?

[Logan]: Seriously, Morality, you don't know what that is? It is a craft designed for water travel.

[Virgil]: Even Prince knew that.

[Roman]: Yeah, even I knew that.

[Patton]: Oh, ok! It does not look like that, but ok.

I just want to point out those all happened in canon. That is all.