“If I Had A Flower For Every Time I Thought Of You…I Could Walk Through My Garden Forever.”

one word prompt: falling

‘hey, bea?’

ava talks at night. you learned this fact while sharing a bed with her, night after night, tucked up in a bed that had been exaggeratedly labelled a double. wrist to wrist, shoulder to shoulder (ashes to ashes). on some nights, when ava was feeling lonely or mean, she would hook her ankle around yours too. or wriggle, making frustrated breathy noises, onto her side like a fish on the sand, and throw an arm across your waist and her face right into the curve of your neck. and then she would talk.

(you can feel her lips against your neck when you concentrate. you have been filling your mind with other, better, safer things instead. like how many hours it’s been since you left switzerland. like miguel being michael being doctor salvius’s son. like how many hours it has been since you prayed, since you emptied out the vessel of your heart and mind, entrusting it’s contents to God. it has been twenty-three days, four hours since my last confession, you think, and stop precisely there.)

‘bea?’

‘i’m here.’

‘how’s your leg?’

you hum. flex the muscles carefully working up from ankle—twinge—calf, knee, thigh. your thigh hurts in a dull way you recognise. it was the strike that staggered you, numbed your leg to the point where it couldn’t bear weight. it would be bruised for a long time but shouldn’t cause you any trouble.

‘much better. and yours?’

in the dark, you can’t see the way she kicks out with both legs but you feel it, the way the bed shakes and the sheets pull and give way, messily. she kicks again and the cool air from the air-conditioning floods beneath the sheets, now fully untucked. her heels thud back down to the mattress. the sheets settle more slowly, falling around your limbs.

‘ava!’

‘gotta test them. all good again.’

‘you’re worried,’ you say, because that was another thing you learned in switzerland. anything you say to each other in the dark can be forgiven. anything you say in the dark is only as real as you want it to be come morning. ‘about the halo. about being paralyzed again.’

‘yeah. and a lot more than that.’

it’s not a perfect darkness. when you turn your head, her profile is outlined by the glow of the balcony lights. anything you say in the dark is forgotten, forgiven. what about what you might do? you reach out. touch two fingers to her forehead. she gasps. doesn’t move as you follow the light, the path laid out in front of you. you chart her forehead, dip at the bridge of her nose. such a light touch. she doesn’t move. when you reach the tip of her nose, she scrunches it just to make you smile. you’re still smiling as your fingers drop to her lips.

ava breathes out. hot air against your fingers. you trip over her top lip, lightly graze the bottom, and when you make it to her chin you’re breathing like you ran a marathon.

‘bea,’

‘i would stay,’ you tell her. ‘if it went out. if you wanted me to. maybe,’ you say, because you can be mean too, ‘even if you didn’t want me to.’

Your 100 days of fanfic is v v cute!!! Any interest in something kidfic-related for Supercorp? Like Lena and Kara hearing their baby's first words perhaps? Thanks!

She doesn’t really consider herself much of a mother. After all, the maternal figures she had to look up to growing up were few and far between. (A nanny there, a teacher here…so it goes.) And yet, her daughter’s curious blue eyes stir something deep inside of her, and it sort of feels like she’s been doing this her whole life, even if chopping up fruit was never something she imagined for herself.

“I swear I heard her say Mom,” Kara says, breaking Lena out of her thoughts. She smiles, because Kara swears up and down every week that their daughter has spoken her first word, and hasn’t been right yet.

“Are you sure it just wasn’t her normal noises when she likes whatever she’s eating?”

“Like yum? No. It was mom. Moooommm.” Kara crosses her arms over her chest, looking at Lena a little petulantly. “I want her first word to be Mom.”

“I mean, I don’t know what else it would be. She has two moms.”

“Mommy. But I’m mommy. And I want you to be Mom.”

Lena laughs, turning her head to watch their daughter play with some colorful toys Kara had snuck in last week, even after Lena had said no more toys. “Any particular reason why?”

“No, none,” Kara answers with faux innocence. “Just that if she recognizes you as mom first, maybe you’ll stop thinking this is all a dream.”

It’s said jokingly, but there’s more than a little truth to the statement, and not for the first time Lena wonders how Kara got to know her so well. “It’s a mighty good dream though.”

Kara smirks and lets the topic drop. “Maybe we should revisit that one dream you had, remember, I think it involved me and a shower—”

Lena’s face burns bright, the knife slips, and she feels a sting on her finger where fruit juices begin to seep into her freshly sliced flesh. “Oh shit,” she mumbles, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her bloody finger.

Then, from across the room, what Kara has been hoping for finally happens: “Oh shit, Mom.”

They pause, then Kara turns to Lena with a huge grin. “Do you see that? She’s a prodigy!”

Ava mimicking Bea’s fight style because she was trained by her

“Almost everywhere where it gives happiness, there is joy in nonsense.”

— Friedrich Nietzsche

Ulladulla, New South Wales | trenny_m

“I don’t regret us but I wouldn’t do it again.”

— Unknown

How To Draw A Horse - a comic by Emma Hunsinger

WHY SUPERCORP ALREADY WON

I know there are people out there who are not getting tired of telling us "supercorp isn't going to happen because the sc fans are bullies/are toxic/the worst, blah blah blah, and need to be punished".

The truth is, they don't know what will happen, no one does (except the people who actually work on the show).

And yet they keep yelling it into the void of the internet with a conviction like it's already set in stone.

But why? They probably think they say it in order to disillusion us, but that just shows they don't know us. They don't know what it's like to be queer and to find yourself in a fictional ship. They don't know what we've already been through.

The truth is they can't disillusion us because we have no illusions. We know what can happen, we've seen it before. No one is more prepared for supercorp not happening than us. Queer fans have been disappointed by tv shows/movies for decades, we barely know anything else.

So what if supercorp isn't going to happen? We'll do what we have always done and will continue to do. We'll take the loss, dust ourselves off and go back to creating fanart and fanworks. We'll keep our fandom alive. Like the sq fandom, the clexa fandom and so many others have done before, the sc fandom will do it too.

There's nothing for us to be afraid of. We don't actually expect this time to be different. We prepare for the worst (and hope for the best), like we always do.

The anti-sc people however, their hate is all they got. No fanworks, no community, no hope.

So what if sc actually becomes canon? They'll be the ones who don't know how to handle the disappointment. They rarely had to before. Not in the same capacity as we queer fans anyway. They'll have nothing left, because they don't have much to begin with. They'll lose.

That's why they are afraid. That's why they yell "supercorp is not going to happen" over and over again. They are desperate, they need their own words to become true. They yell it to comfort themselves. They yell it to drown out their fear, like warriors storming into a battle.

They can't see they've already lost. The war is already over and they've chosen the losing side.

Because the truth is, no matter if supercorp happens or not, we have already won. We are and forever will be the biggest fandom of the show. Our fanworks will outlast the show. Our community will be here long after all the haters have moved on (probably to another fandom they can harass). Our ship will be remembered by generations of queer women, even after pop culture has long forgotten about the cishet ships and the show itself. Canon supercorp or not, we'll be the last ones standing.

Lena Luthor’s soft smile ™