Abusive Parents Force You To Hide Things You Would Otherwise Never Have To Worry About Hiding, Because

Impalas By: Unknown photographer From: The White Lions of Timbavati 1977

On Isolation

im grilling absolute cheese

Maggie Smith, “Wild”, Goldenrod

Enjoyed the bubble sounds!

unfortunately i DID take what you said to heart and now i’m sobbing and debating on whether i should kill you or kill myself

Warsan Shire, from "For Women Who Are Difficult to Love"

if I’m so “useless” then why do you keep using me?

if I’m so “worthless” then why do you order me around?

if I’m so “incapable” why do you care so much about decreasing my confidence?

If I’m such a “burden” then why do you care so much for keeping me dependant on you and making sure I can’t leave and be on my own?

If I’m so “stupid” then why do keep talking to me? Why not find someone else?

if I’m so “ungrateful” then why do you want me around? You shouldn’t want to give your time and energy to ungrateful people now, should you?

If I’m such a “monster” then why do you not try to get away from me? Why would you bother keeping me against your will, aren’t you scared?

If I’m such a “horrible demon” then why are you not running away from me? Why are you talking to me as if you couldn’t be less worried about what happens to you next?

If I’m such a “selfish creature” then why do you give me anything at all? It’s almost like you need to hold something against me, if I’m selfish why should I care if I’m called that?

It’s almost like your manipulative logic doesn’t hold up to tiniest bit of scrutiny. So why are you lying so much? Saying one thing and then doing as if the opposite is true doesn’t show you in good light. It turns out I’ve been plenty useful, plenty valuable, capable, bearing you as a burden even, smart enough to see thru you, grateful enough to tolerate your bullshit even though you never gave me a good reason to, harmless to you to the point where you could take your shit out on me unbothered and unafraid, selfless enough to put away my very own well being for the sake of your needs, so why do you think now, after all, I would forgive you lying to me? Don’t expect forgiveness from me.

“Resisting your abusers is not abuse. Talking back to your abusers is not abuse. Screaming and fighting back to save yourself is not abuse. Trying to escape from them is not abuse. Calling them out is not abuse. Hurting them is not abuse.”

— only if you had tremendous amount of power over them, it could be called abuse, but in that case, they would never dare to abuse you in the first place because their life would depend on you, and not the reverse. You do not have the power to trap or abuse them, and if they pretend otherwise, they’re lying. (via furiousgoldfish)