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đŹđźđŠđŠđđ«đČ: your relationship is still very new, and you're getting ready to tell the rest of the team about it. in the meantime, you find yourselves again in another unusual hotel...where suddenly spencer starts acting very strangely?
đđšđ§đđđ§đđŹ/đ©đšđđđ§đđąđđ„ đđ°: glasses spencer reid x newbau!female!reader, fluff, intimacy conversation, spender being adorably shy
đ/đ§: 'matilda how many more times are you gonna write that one bed trope' AS MUCH AS I CAN TILL I DIE btw i wrote this fic over a pretty long period of time, had a main idea (supposedly), but in the end i'm not happy with how it turned outâkinda all over the place. anyway, enjoy
đ°đšđ«đđŹ: 4.8k
"My five dollars"
Spencer sighed and reached into his jacket pocket to pull out the slightly crumpled bill. You closed it in your hand, a triumphant smile on your face.
"Let's make bets more often, darling," you suggested.
When you used that nickname, his gaze briefly flickered over your face, as if studying whether it had been said purely in jest.
"Youâre puffing up like you just invented the wheel," he said, gently shaking his head from side to side. "And just to remind you, all you did was park parallel."
"Parked parallel, indeed. And my coffee?"
He also handed you the paper cup heâd been holding while you performed those incredibly complicated car maneuvers that the bet was about. It was morning, the first day back at work. January, the first days of the new year. You had just arrived at the office parking lot in your car, after spending the night at your place. Everything around you still seemed to smell of that melancholic blend of the past mixed with the fresh scent of the coming months. And coffee, bought at the cafĂ© on the way.
You took a tiny sip of the hot drink. Spencer, it seemed, hadnât touched his even once. Both of you, consciously or not, were stretching out the moment just a little longer. And, truth be told, you could afford to. The parking lot around you was only beginning to fill with cars, suggesting the early hour. It was nice to sit there together, sharing the quiet without any discomfort.
You realized this was supposed to be your first day at work as a couple.
A warm, pleasant feeling spread through you at the sound of that word, even though you hadnât said it out loud. It still felt a little unreal. You had grown closer during the New Yearâs Eve party at your place. It was only after that sharedâand not just oneâkiss that a new perspective dawned on you about the past months of your relationship, revealing some undefined emotions.
"I was wondering..." Spender suddenly began, his brows furrowed slightly, pulling you out of your thoughts.
His gaze suddenly fell on his watch.
"We still have some time," you reassured him calmly. "Let me guess. You've been wondering what would happen if we crossed the DNA of a jellyfish that can reverse its life cycle with the human genome?"
A small smile flickered across his face, a touch of affection despite the rather serious expression on the rest of his face.
"That too," he admitted, nodding. Then he opened his mouth, with some visible hesitation, as if a particular question was troubling him. You shifted in the driver's seat, preparing for whatever he wanted to discuss, whatever he wanted to ask. "How...how are we supposed to act...you know, towards each other? At work?"
For a moment, your brain didnât understand what he meant. But then, a fleeting oh escaped you as the meaning of his words sank in, and you realized that it was indeed something worth considering. Somehow, over the past few days, neither of you had brought it up. You had just gone back to work, without any reflection on the fact that none of your colleagues knew about the progress in your relationship. About how it had suddenly taken a step to a completely different level.
Spencer studied your face in silence, waiting for a response. As he looked at you, coming up with a logical solution became incredibly difficult. Before you finally said anything, you let out two half-intelligent mutters, like a fish thrown onto the surface.
"We have to tell them," you finally said, stating the obvious. "Somehow. Maybe...we can meet at my place this weekend. All of us. Or we could go out somewhere, and then tell them calmly."
"This weekend?" Spencer repeated cautiously.
It was Monday.
Suddenly, it became incredibly hard to read the expression on his face. He was facing you, his brows slightly furrowed, a look of uncertainty, almost withdrawal. The air inside your car thickened, making the silence even more palpable. He seemed almost concerned, downcast. You froze, wondering if you had really said something wrong.
"So until then," he started more quietly, "are we just supposed to hide it from them?"
âI'm not sure hide is the right word," you replied with a grimace. "I just...I meant, maybe we should wait. For a better moment, you know? Instead of walking into the office on the first Monday of the year, when half the people are still nursing hangovers, and saying hey, guess what? we hooked up!â
His expression hadn't changed, despite your pretty honest explanation.
"You don't like the idea," you stated, rather than asking. You made sure your voice sounded gentle, adjusting it to the situation. "I can see that, Spencer."
"Okay, you're right, I don't like it," he admitted with a sudden coolness, his lips tightening slightly between sentences. "Because...I don't get your reasoning. Or, maybe I just donât know if this is really what you mean."
Slightly surprised, you shook your head.
"What else could Iâ"
"I donât know if it's really about that, or maybe..." he cut off, looking into your eyes as if hoping you'd understand by now. But you didn't have the skill to read his mind, no matter how remarkable it wasâit was also incredibly complex. "Or maybe...I donât know, you just donât take it seriously. That's why you don't want to tell anyone about it."
You gasped, finally understanding his behavior. Realizing the hidden concern.
"Youâre worried I don't take us seriously?"
Spencer shrugged briefly.
"You know, if that's really the case, I'd rather know now..."
You leaned in to catch one of his hands, which had been clasped over his chest. You broke his defensive stance, pulling him toward you by his long fingers, simply holding it for a moment before speaking again. With a smile. A slightly amused smile.
"Of course, I take us seriously, you idiot," you snorted. A sense of relief washed over you. Earlier, heâd seemed genuinely worried, and youâd been expecting far worse things than the fact that your guy literally paled with anxiety over worrying you werenât as invested in your fresh relationship as he was. Well, out of context, it sounded like a very serious concern. But the context was, you took it seriously, and you were incredibly happy he did too. "You know what? Maybe you're right. Why should we make idiots out of ourselves for the next week? Letâs just walk in like this."
You motioned toward your intertwined fingers, raising them as if they were a trophy earned through sweat and tears. Spencer followed their movement with his gaze, initially surprised, but then the corner of his mouth twitched, and he tilted his head with a quiet chuckle.
"We can do it your way," he said, taking control of your hands, clasping them with both of his. He looked relieved; your reassurance and the sincerity in your voice clearly calmed him. You smiled too, finally seeing that peace on his face. "I really don't mind waiting a few days. It might even be⊠interesting. One of us might not hold out and accidentally slip up."
You raised an eyebrow in a teasing manner.
"Another bet, Reid?" you clicked your tongue. You kept eye contact with him, feeling his thumb gently tracing circles on the back of your hand. He seemed so unaffected, as if he didnât realize he was doing it. "You already lost five bucks aboutâŠten minutes ago. At this rate, you'll be broke within a month, and we'll have to skip that overpriced coffee downtown. Now that would be a real horror story, speaking as a citizen of the first world."
"Didn't say anything about another bet!â
"Too late," you shot back, turning his hand and taking it in a more formal handshake. "Handshakes sealed the deal."
He rolled his eyes, but a half-smile lingered on his face. He still hadnât let go of your hand.
"I think we should get going," he said reluctantly.
You sighed with the same enthusiasm. You really felt stuck to that seat, right next to him.
"You know, being late on the first day of the new year should be fully justified..."
"We really need to go."
He was right. But before either of you could move to get out of the car, he leaned forward. Gently cupping your cheek, he drew you in, his lips meeting yours in a soft, lingering kiss. You closed your eyes, feeling the warmth of his touch, and for a brief moment, the world outside seemed to vanishâjust the two of you, in that quiet, perfect stillness.
His face suddenly turned to the side, noticing something through the windshield. You frowned and looked in the same direction.
"That's Gideon," you remarked out loud, even though both of you had already spotted the silhouette of your coworker stepping out of a car that had just parked a short distance ahead. He wasnât looking your way yet, but he could at any moment. "Quick, hide!"
Okay, you were completely honest with yourself. It wasnât about being afraid of getting caught. After all, there was nothing strange about two coworkers arriving at work together in the same carâit was even very eco-friendly. You just liked the idea of shoving Reid under the seat. And the poor thing, so thrown off by the mock authority in your voice and the situation itself, did it without a second thought.
When Gideon finally noticed you, you cheerfully waved at him.
"Fuck," you muttered suddenly.
"What is it?" Spencer returned to his seat, adjusting his glasses on his nose. "Do you think he saw me?"
You shook your head.
"I just realizedâŠthis is your car."
*
"Okay, draw a straw."
"Morgan, how old are you?" You shook your head in disbelief, staring at the man standing across from you in the motel lobby. The place where you were spending the night this time was very tidy, with subdued colors, but, as tradition demanded, there had to be some sort of problem. You had one room for two, but one of them only had a double bed. So, you had to decide which two lucky people would share it. "Five?"
"And a half. Listen, we have to decide somehow. Let fate do it. The two who pull the shortest will sleep together. Simple as that."
Before you could say anything else, Garcia approached, weighed down by her bags. Yes, herârarely did any case require her to be on-site, but it wasnât completely unheard of.
"Oh, come on, Sweetie," she muttered to you, setting her luggage down and hunching slightly to catch her breath. "Let him feel like a kid again for a moment. He doesnât get the chance often."
You sighed in resignation, but before you could pull one of the purple straws (how did he even get them?) that Morgan was holding in such a way that their lengths were hidden, you glanced around briefly. Sometimes you arrived at hotels at different times, some getting there faster, others later. Spencer and JJ had just walked in, both wearing coats to shield them from the cold January air. You couldnât help but smile at the sight of him and his fogged-up glasses, which he quietly cursed under his breathâjudging by the movement of his lips. However, you quickly composed yourself, returning to a neutral expression. It had only been two days since your agreement to keep the details of your relationship hidden, and so far, neither of you had slipped or forgotten to keep quiet around the others. Well, out of the two of you, you were probably struggling with it moreâbeing a bit of a clinger, sometimes even your body would naturally gravitate towards his when standing next to him.
âWhy are you standing here?â Spencer asked, approaching you. âIs there a problem with the rooms?â
âIs there ever not a problem with the rooms?â you responded, laughing. âSome poor souls are going to have to share a bed,â you explained, making brief eye contact with him. You were sure only he could catch the emphasis you placed on poor souls.
Of course, you wouldn't mind ending up in the same room. It wasn't about the fact that you were togetherâbefore, youâd shared rooms and even beds, and you were used to it by now. You would've probably offered it yourself, if it werenât for the potential suspicion and that silly bet, which was starting to lose its point in your eyes. Maybe you shouldâve just told them a few days ago?
âOh,â he said shortly, crossing his arms with a bit of stiffness. His brown bag hung from his shoulder. He held your gaze for a moment, but his expression wasnât as amused as yours. His brows furrowed slightly as he cleared his throat. âPoor them. Whoâs it going to be?â
You slightly puffed out your lips slightly, watching him with a sharp look. What was it that made him so uneasyâthe fact that you might not be in the same room this time?
âWe were just about to decide,â Penelope replied, glancing at her friend with a teasing smile. âMorganâs going to show us a game he learned today in kindergarten."
 JJ couldn't help but snort.
 âJust draw a strawâŠ!â
You couldnât recall another moment when all of you, every single one, rolled your eyes in perfect unison. But thatâs exactly what happened when Derek once again enthusiastically explained the rules, as though they werenât already ridiculously simple. In the end, each of you reached for one of the straws he was holding.
JJ went first. She pulled hers quickly, and it was of regular length, so it was immediately clear she wasnât one of the poor souls. She raised her hand in a mock display of triumph, earning a few amused chuckles from the group.
Your turn came next. You approached the task with a certain gravity, as though the fate of the night depended entirely on the straw you chose. You studied each one carefully, as if their lengths could somehow be deciphered from the way they were arranged.
You wouldnât have minded drawing the shortest straw. But only on one condition.Â
Morgan looked at you with mock sympathy. Your straw wasnât even half as long as JJâs, which seemed to settle things. Now, it was just a matter of figuring out which of the remaining twoâReid or Garciaâwould end up joining you.
Spencer reached out with a calculated, deliberate motion, his eyes immediately darting to yours when his straw turned out to be...one of the longer ones.
You shot him a look of bitter disappointment before your gaze shifted to your soon-to-be roommate. Penelope didnât seem disheartenedâon the contrary, an enthusiastic smile lit up her face. She opened her mouth to say something, but you caught the fleeting shift in her expression and the subtle flicker of her eyes.
âOh no,â she suddenly gasped, her voice filled with exaggerated horror, even though sheâd just seemed perfectly content, or at least not displeased, at the idea of sharing a room with you. âNo, absolutely not. Thereâs no way Iâm sleeping in the same room with her. Do you guys even know how loud she snores?â
Lies! You wanted to yell, but stopped yourself as realization dawned. Garcia was a good actressâyou had to give her thatâbut her flair for dramatics always bordered on overkill, making it far too easy to catch her in a lie.
âIâm not used to traveling as often as you guys are,â Penelope continued in the same over-the-top tone. âI barely get a wink of sleep in a new place when itâs quiet, let alone with someone next to me snoring like a steam engineâŠâ
âLove you too, Pen,â you muttered dryly.
âSomeone has to switch with me, please,â she concluded, clasping her fingers together in a dramatic plea and pulling off the best puppy-dog eyes youâd seen in a long time. Well, at least since the time Reid had tried to coax you into reciting one of your old, cringe-worthy high school poemsâthe existence of which youâd only ever confessed to him.
âJJ?â Penelope turned her hopeful gaze toward her.
âNot a chance. My straw was the longest,â JJ replied, smug and immovable.
âDonât even think about asking me,â Morgan chimed in before anyone could so much as glance in his direction.
And so, all eyes inevitably fell on Reid.
He awkwardly scratched the back of his ear, not looking directly at you.
âWell, I always carry earplugs with meâŠâ
âThen itâs settled!â Garcia declared, hoisting her luggage with sudden determination. One of her heavy bags was thrust into Morganâs arms so abruptly that he staggered backward under its weight. âSweet dreams, everyone! Donât let the bedbugs bite, and may the sheep you count tonight be extra fluffy and adorable. Goodnight!â
Just before she fully turned to leave, she sent you a quick, knowing wink.
You shook your head in disbelief, but the faintest smile danced on your lips. You didnât even bother questioning how she knew. Only one conclusion circled your mind. Penelope could be really impossible. Thankfully, being impossible didnât disqualify her from also being the best friend under this vast, sprawling sky. Period.
*
"What do you think about starting a tier list for all the hotels we stay in?â you remarked as both of you crossed the threshold of the room. Your eyes immediately landed on its unexpected feature. âOr at least the weirdest ones. Like the one with walls the color of cat pee where the power went out in the middle of the night. That oneâs definitely at the top..."
"I donât really get the point of a mirror on the ceiling," Reid said after a pause, looking over his shoulder at you. He was standing a few steps away, near the bed in the glaring white room with birchwood floors. "Who wants to look at themselves while trying to fall asleep?â
You raised an eyebrow, unsure if he was joking or not. He raised an eyebrow too, not understanding why you did that. Okay, he wasnât joking.
"You know, the main point isnât really to look at yourself while falling asleep," you explained, with a bit of amused pity. Your gaze also briefly lingered on the glass surface above the bed, designed to reflect the bodies of people lying in bed. You thought it was a surprising addition but werenât planning on spending too much time on it for now. You just wanted to get your shoes offâshoes youâd been wearing since sunriseâand finally lie down on something soft. "By the way, Iâm taking a shower first."
Spencer only muttered something under his breath in response. Before disappearing behind the bathroom door, you cast one last glance at him. He seemed quietâstrangely quiet. Not that you were expecting his usual chatter after a long day of work; it could weigh on anyone and leave them feeling subdued. Maybe he just needed an extra moment to unwind, and thatâs where his restraint came from.
Anyway, you took a quick shower. The pressure of the hot water nearly scalded your skin, which meant youâd be spared the bitter complaints, grumbling, and dramatic resignation threats from Morgan the next day. You felt too tired to linger under the stream for long. After a few minutes, you stepped out of the shower, changed into your sleepwear, and gathered the clothes youâd worn all day from the floor.
You and Spencer passed each other in the doorway without a word.
Glancing back over your shoulder, you frowned. The bathroom door shut behind him, and some concerned question froze on your lips. For a moment, you stood still, debating whether you should ask it. But then the sound of running water reached your ears, and you figured he probably wouldnât hear you anyway.
Instead, you decided to climb into bed, wait for him, and ask about it then. Whatever it was clearly weighed on him, and the fact that something was bothering him bothered you. Funny how that worked, right?
You spent that moment lying on your back, eyes wide open, afraid you might accidentally fall asleep if you closed them. A comfortable bed during a caseâit felt like pure luxury. You were waiting for Spencer to finally emerge from the bathroom so you could curl up next to him, fall asleep to the fresh post-shower scent of him, and the gentle rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.
Just like you had spent half the day after the New Yearâs party at your placeâwrapped around each other, arguing over who would get up to make coffee and whether you should start cleaning up the mess from the night before.
You tucked your arm beneath your head, gazing at your fully-covered form reflected in the ceiling mirror.
âDid you find a portal to another galaxy in there or what?â you finally called out, impatient. Heâd been in there way too long. And coming from youâa known lover of long, indulgent bathsâthat was saying something.
âSorry,â he murmured as he finally emerged from the bathroom, wearing a gray t-shirt instead of his usual neat work attire and tie perfectly knotted at his neck. He still had his glasses on, which he mightâve forgotten to remove, judging by the way he slid into bed to your left without taking them off.
You watched him closely, rubbing at your tired eye. The shower had managed to wash away about half of the tension from Spencerâs face, but the other half stubbornly remained.
âYou didnât have to wait for me,â he said softly.
âI didnât have to,â you admitted simply, watching as he carefully adjusted himself, finding the right position. The lamp on his side of the bed cast a warm glow over his skin. You were both half-sitting, you comfortably propped up against the soft pillows, and him barely leaning back against them. âBut I wanted to. We really lucked out with this room, huh? Penelope is one of a kind.â
"Did you tell her about us?"
"I didnât say a word. She's just more observant than the restâ
He nodded, agreeing with you. You thought he might say something else about it, maybe make a joke about the bet, but he didnât. You yawned.
"You seem tired.â
âHow did you figure that out, Sherlock?â you asked, your sarcasm light, without a hint of malice. âYou too, by the way. Although, itâs not just that you seem tiredâyou are tired, at first glance. Or maybe somethingâs bothering you. Or maybe both. Am I right?â
He shrugged slowly.
âNo, as far as I know.â
âOh, come on,â you muttered, rolling your eyes. You pulled your knees closer to your chest, shifting into a full sitting position with slightly bent legs. You leaned forward just enough to gently take his glasses off and fold them, your fingers brushing briefly against his cheek. He didnât look at what you were doing, his gaze fixed on your face under the soft fall of his lashes. The wonderful color of his eyes, the slight hesitation in your movements as you moved a little closer to kiss himâa fleeting, tender press of lips.
âSomethingâs going on, and you can tell me about it.â
âOr we could just go to sleep,â he suggested quietly. âItâs been a long day. You must be tired, I mean, you yawned a little while ago.â
You tilted your head, studying him thoughtfully. Was he really trying this hard to dodge the topic? How could you get him to open up?
âI know blackmail isnât exactly healthy for relationships,â you started finally, turning his glasses over in your hands, âbut Iâm not giving these back until you tell me.â
Both corners of his mouth twitched at once.
âOh no, what am I going to do now?â he replied with feigned concern, gently shaking his head. Then he lowered his voice. âThis is exactly what Iâd say if I didnât also have contacts with me.â
"Sometimes I just want toâŠugh."
"Violence isn't too healthy for relationships either."
"Just like not opening up. Remember what we talked about a few days ago in the car? You were worried I don't take you seriously. How else am I supposed to prove I'm serious if I donât ask whatâs wrong when I can tell somethingâs off?"
Your explanation sounded a bit jumbled, but he had to get the general idea. The reference to that specific conversation and his own words seemed to hit a sensitive spot.
"I didnât want you to feel like you have to prove anything to me," he quickly corrected, swallowing hard. His chest fell, and the sigh felt like surrender. "I'm sorry. I just don't want you to worry about it. It's nothing serious. Iâm just tired...and a little stressed."
"Stressed?" you repeated, surprised. "You're stressed? But about what?"
He hesitated for a moment.
"Just... about this," he said vaguely, his gaze shifting from you to your reflection in the glass ceiling. "Us, I mean."
"What do you mean?" you asked quietly, still confused, gently shaking your head. "We've shared rooms before, so if itâs about that, I really donât get it."
"Yeah, but never like this. In a room with a king-sized bed and a huge mirror right above us," he explained, his voice tinged with embarrassment, clearly wishing he could just stop talking. "Okay, I know this sounds dumb, I know it does, but I donât know why itâs messing with my head like this. I just...I kinda thought maybe you'd want to..."
"Spencer," you interrupted, saving him from going any further. You saw a flicker of relief in his eyes. You werenât sure what emotion was bubbling up inside you nowâwhether it was still confusion or just pure amusement. "You were worried Iâd want to have sex with you?âÂ
You didnât even need to wait for his answer to know youâd hit the nail on the head. Considering how your relationship had grown out of friendship, slowly evolving over time and shared experiences instead of a sudden burst of passion, you werenât surprised you hadnât yet taken that step together. It was something special in its own wayâthere had never been any pressure, and you hadnât expected that he might feel the exact opposite.
So when you finally figured out what had been bothering him all this time, you couldnât help but laugh, the sound light and genuine.
"You were right, you know. It does sound kind of dumb," you said, unable to keep the smile from your face. His expression remained unreadable, his posture betraying a hint of anticipation as he waited for the rest of your reaction. "But alsoâŠI donât know, kind of adorable? But seriously, Spencer, we donât have to do anything if youâre not ready."
"Itâs not that I donât want to at all," he clarified quickly, almost too firmly. "I mean...itâd be our first time. Together. Thatâs what I mean. And I guess I just didnât expect it to...happen tonight, here, of all places."
"I didnât either," you admitted truthfully, the smile still lingering on your face. Unlike him, you didnât feel even a hint of embarrassment. "I figured weâd just go to sleep, especially since we both already admitted weâre exhausted."
"Fair point," he mumbled.
"Honestly, this has to be the biggest example of overthinking Iâve ever seen anyone put themselves through, Spencer," you teased lightly, shaking your head.
For a moment, he stayed silent, but it felt like he was letting out a breath heâd been holding.
âYouâre gonna have to get used to that,â he admitted finally, his voice soft. But then, you caught the faint glimmer of a smile tugging at his lips.
He even started to laugh, a quiet chuckle filled with a sort of amused self-awareness. Meanwhile, you leaned out of the bed to place his glasses on the nightstand on your side. If he wanted them in the morning, heâd have no choice but to reach right over you.
âBut just for the record,â he began after a moment, as you reached for the edge of the blanket that had slipped off you earlier, pulling it back up to wrap around yourself. Your head was only inches from the pillow now. You gave him a questioning nod. He, too, was getting ready to lie down, finally looking genuinely relaxed. âHow pathetic do you think that was, on a scale from one to ten?â
You just rolled your eyes, not even dignifying the question with an answer.
âIn the interest of science,â he pressed, âone to ten?â
âPathetic enough that youâll need to redeem yourself a little in my eyes,â you sighed dramatically. âGo on, Iâm waiting for your ideas.â
âI think I might have a few,â he replied with a soft chuckle.
You prolonged the kiss, savoring the deep sense of comfort it brought you. The two of you lay face to face, and you gently brushed a few still-damp strands of hair from Spencer's forehead, though they stubbornly fell back into place. Eventually, you gave up with a soft sigh against his lips. Spencer kept his eyes closed, lost in a quiet bliss, even as you pulled back just slightly, leaving only an inch of space between you.
"Can I turn off the light now?" you asked, as always. The question had become a tradition since you'd learned about his complicated relationship with darkness.
He hummed in agreement, nodding faintly. Leaning over him, you reached for the bedside lamp on his side. The room was instantly bathed in darkness, your reflections in the mirror above fading into obscurity.
You didnât fully return to your original spot. Instead, you shifted closer, resting your head comfortably against his chest. The hotel pillows were unbelievably plush, you had to admit, but that night, you chose this over anything else.
"Youâre not asleep," he noted gently after about fifteen minutes. He cleared his throat. "During sleep, a personâs breathing becomes slower and more regular. You know, if youâre uncomfortable here, you donât have toâŠ"
"Iâm listening to your heartbeat," it slipped out of you. Though it was true, you hadnât planned on admitting it out loud. "Nothing sinister, just to be clear. Iâm not planning to rip it out of your chest or anything like that. It just works for me."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Like those videos that imitate the sound of a crackling fireplace. Pretty calming."
"My heartbeat reminds you of the sound of a fireplace?" he said, a glint of confusion in his softly hoarse voice.
You sighed, in the darkness, he couldnât see the faint smile painting itself on your face, pressed against his chest.
"Sweet dreams, silly."
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Perfection
SOME THINGS STAY.â â â 㠀㠀â㠀㠀㠀 ă € ă € S. REID
SUMMARY à§à ever since spencer gave you that delicate little flower necklace, itâs barely left your neck. even when you're getting all dressed up for a fancy night out and it doesn't quite match, youâre not taking it off. itâs his giftâitâs specialâand no way are you going anywhere without a piece of him close to your heart
WARNINGS àČ. fluffâ lots and lots of it, heart-eyes!spencer, emotional!spencer
㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀â â â â ᥣđ© words.á 930
㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀 㠀㠀 ă € ă € ă € ౚà§ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €
Youâre standing in front of the full-length mirror, carefully adjusting the straps of your dress as your heels click softly on the hardwood floor. Itâs elegant, timeless, the kind of dress that makes you feel like youâre starring in some classic black-and-white filmâonly with better lighting.
The zipper is just out of reach, and so, in a soft voice tinted with playful affection, you call out, âSpence, can you zip me up?â
From down the hall, you hear the soft rustle of fabric and the quick, familiar shuffle of socked feet on hardwood. Moments later, Spencer appears behind you, looking unfairly beautiful in his suit and slightly crooked tie, his hair falling a little messily over his forehead. He has his glasses on, which always makes your heart stutter for no good reason.
âI can do that,â he says gently, already stepping closer.
His fingers brush your back as he slowly pulls the zipper upward, the motion achingly carefulâas though heâs handling fine lace or some kind of sacred treasure. Which, knowing him, youâre pretty sure he thinks you are.
Once the zipperâs secured, you expect him to pull away. But instead, his hands settle lightly on your waist, and his eyes catch on the chain around your neck. His brows knit together as he leans forward to inspect the pendant more closely.
âYouâre wearing the necklace I gave you,â he says softly, a surprised note in his voice.
You glance down at it in the mirror. Itâs a simple silver chain, holding a small glass orb with a tiny, pressed forget-me-not encased inside. The gift he gave you months agoâafter one of those long, exhausting stretches where he was gone on a case for ten days straight. He had handed it to you, sheepishly, in the middle of your shared kitchen, mumbling something about permanence and flowers and how he hoped youâd like it.
âI am,â you say, your smile soft and content.
Spencer tilts his head. âBut⊠it doesnât quite go with the neckline. I mean, aesthetically speaking, it interrupts the visual line of the bodice, andââ He pauses, recognizing your expression of amusement in the mirror. âSorry, I was rambling.â
You giggle under your breath. âA little.â
He clears his throat, his fingers gently brushing against the clasp at the back of your neck. âI could take it off for you. Just for tonight. Iâll put it somewhere safe, I promise.â
But you immediately shoo his hands away, your tone light but firm. âNope.â
He blinks. âWhat do you mean ânopeâ?â
âI mean no.â You turn to face him now, reaching up to fix his slightly crooked tie. âYou gave it to me. Itâs yours. Iâm not taking it off.â
Spencer stares at you, blinking slowly, like heâs trying to process the words but his brain short-circuited somewhere in the middle.
âIâŠâ He exhales. âBut it doesnât matchââ
âStill,â you interrupt gently, smoothing your hands over his lapels. âItâs my favorite thing. You picked it out. You remembered what flower I said I liked when we watched that documentary about botanical symbolism and how they used to mean secret messages.â Your eyes meet his, full of warmth. âItâs the most you thing I own. So yeahâobviously, Iâm not taking it off. Ever.â
And thatâs it. Thatâs the moment Spencer Reid absolutely melts into a puddle of goo on the bedroom floor. His eyes go glassy, his mouth opening just enough to say somethingâanythingâbut no words come out. Just a breath. A shaky, wonderstruck breath.
âYou remembered I said that?â he murmurs, like he still canât quite believe it.
âOf course I did. Youâre you.â
He laughs, quiet and breathless, before pulling you into a gentle hug. His arms wrap around you tightly, almost like heâs afraid if he lets go, the moment might dissolve. âYouâre unbelievable,â he whispers into your hair.
âYou say that like itâs a bad thing.â
He chuckles, and you feel his lips press to the top of your head. âNo. Itâs the best thing.â
㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀㠀 㠀㠀 ă € ă € ă € ౚà§ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €ă €
Spencer walks into the bullpen looking like a man who just witnessed actual magic.
âSomeoneâs glowing,â Emily teases as he drops his bag by his desk. âDid the gala have an open bar or did your girlfriend finally admit sheâs secretly a time traveler?â
âShe wore the necklace I gave her,â Spencer says, completely unprompted. Heâs not even looking at anyone. He just says it with this dazed little smile on his face.
âOh?â JJ glances over. âThe pressed flower one?â
âYeah,â Spencer nods, adjusting his satchel strap unnecessarily. âIt didnât match her dress at all. Like, it was totally off. I offered to take it off for her, but she wouldnât let me. She saidâŠâ He trails off for a moment, eyes unfocused, like heâs reliving it all over again. âShe said it was my gift, so sheâs never taking it off. Ever.â
Thereâs a collective pause around the bullpen.
And thenâ
âAwwwwwww!â comes in stereo from Garcia and JJ.
âGod, thatâs so disgustingly cute,â Emily says, sipping her coffee with a smirk. âHow are you not married yet?â
âI love love,â Penelope declares, dramatically clutching her heart. âYouâve got the heart-eyes going so hard, Doctor Reid.â
Spencer just shrugs, a soft smile still pulling at his lips. âI guess I do.â
Thereâs a long pause. Then, almost absently, he adds: âI think Iâm going to get her another one. One for every flower sheâs ever told me about.â
And just like that, Emily squeals and Garcia nearly falls off her chair.
©iamgonnagetyoubackౚৠplease refrain from copying, translating, or reposting any of my work
This is so sweet đ€
spencer and readers first fight ! can you possiblyyyy do something along the lines of spencer said something sassy/petty/mean which results in reader giving spencer the silent treatment and he crashes out begging for her to speak to him đ€âđŒ
your first fight with spencer genre: slight angst, fluff word count: 1,7k a/n: i've been so excited to write this one! honestly way too long for a drabble, but i hope you enjoy it
âThatâs okay. Your mind wouldnât be able to comprehend a concept like this."
Spencer didnât understand the gravity of his words before you huffed out a sigh, placing your hands on your knees as you lifted yourself up from the spot next to him on the couch. His eyes followed your body as you walked straight toward your shared bedroom, opening the door before shutting it behind you with a bang. The click of the lock echoed through the now silent living room.
Spencer sat frozen in place, his gaze fixed on the door as if youâd magically reappear in front of him.
Everything about your body language hinted at you being angry, but he couldnât grasp why. He replayed the situation back in his head in an effort to decipher the reason.
You had cheerfully greeted him when he entered the apartment. Heâd been away on a case for several days, not having had the time to speak to you over the phone or give you any updates on how he was doing.
As much as he preferred keeping clear boundaries between his personal and professional life, Spencer couldnât resist telling you the details of some of his cases when coming home. Not when the psychology behind the unsubs fascinated him so much. And especially not when you eagerly pulled him toward the couch, pushing him down onto the soft cushions as you handed him a cup of freshly brewed coffee, ready to hear about his day.
You sat cross-legged in front of him, eyes twinkling with admiration as he told you about todayâs case. He explained how he discovered a pattern in the way the unsub took his captives, using the numbers 11235 â the first five numerals in the Fibonacci sequence.
He noticed the frown forming between your brows as he got into more detail.
âCan you explain that to me? I donât get it,â you asked.
âThatâs okay. Your mind wouldnât be able to comprehend a concept like this.â
Spencer wasnât lying. He remembered how his coworkers had blankly stared at him when he analyzed his theory â how Emily made eye contact with JJ, their silent looks saying there he goes again, and how Hotch had to cut him off to tell him to get to the point. It wasnât like he didnât want to explain it to you, he just didnât see the point in doing so, not when he knew this was a connection only he could understand.
After a couple of minutes, there was still radio-silence. Spencer got up and walked to the bedroom, knocking softly on the door. âAngel? Can you open up for me?â
âJust go away, Spencer.â
Your voice cracked, like you had been crying, and the sound made his heart sink.
âPlease open the door so we can talk. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
âWhatâs wrong?â Your scoff vibrated through the door. âI donât even want to talk to you if you canât understand whatâs wrong.â
Spencer swallowed hard, his hands turning clammy. He didnât like confrontations and especially not with you. Youâd never fought before. Rationally, he knew fights werenât necessarily a bad thing â conflicts usually stemmed from deeper fears and feelings that get triggered, and confronting these feelings could lead to creating an even stronger bond. But right now, all he wanted was to turn back time and make sure those words never left his mouth.
His mind blanked in situations like these, so the only logical fix he could come up with was to call Derek.
âHey,â Spencer spoke through the phone, balancing the device between his ear and shoulder as he nervously paced through the living room.
âHey man. Whatâs up?â
âI messed up.â
Morganâs chuckle sounded through the speaker. âOur genius making a mistake. Who wouldâve thought the day would come?â
Spencer sighed, losing his patience. âItâs serious.â
Derek paused before responding. âAlright, slow down. Tell me what happened.â
Spencer repeated the conversation for what felt like the hundredth time that day, his guilt accumulating with each repetition. He gulped when he heard Derek take a sharp inhale at the other side of the line. He could almost see him shaking his head.
âOkay,â Derek began. âNow listen to me. When it comes down to it, all women are the same, they just need some loving and appreciation. Go buy her some flowers before the store closes.â
Spencer didnât need to be told twice. He glanced one last time at the still-locked bedroom door before heading out.
Thankfully, Spencerâs apartment was close to downtown. He hurried into the first flower shop that he spotted, his eyes scanning the bouquets until they landed on a pair of bright colored lilies. The outer corners of the petals shone with a radiant shade of pink, fading into a soft white at the center.
He cleared his throat as he placed the flowers on the counter. âCan I have these, please?â
The woman behind the counter started wrapping them in pink paper, reaching out for lint to tie a bow. âTrouble in paradise?â
Spencer blinked, not often experiencing someone seeing right through him. Besides his coworkers. And you.
âYa know, I see so many men come in here on the daily. You can just tell they got in trouble with their lady; sweating bullets and rushing to pick a bouquet the second before the store closes.â She twirled the bouquet in her hand as she pulled on the strings of the lint bow. âAt least you picked a nice one.â
âDo-,â Spencer hesitated, his voice softening in an uncertain whisper. âWill she forgive me after this?â
âDepends on what ya did,â she answered with a lift of her shoulders. âWhat I can tell you is that flowers donât do much fixing.â
Damn it, Derek.
The florist turned around, rummaging through a drawer, before pulling out an envelope and sliding it across the counter.
âWrite,â she stated in a single syllable. âWe need words. We need to know that you care, and we need you to put more effort into it than paying ten dollars.â
With a new plan in mind, Spencer hurried home. The apartment was still silent when he returned, the door firmly closed and no signs of you having left the bedroom. He sighed and made his way to his desk, shoving aside piles of books and papers until he had enough space to write. He opened the envelope the florist had given him, and carefully pulled out a sheet of blank stationary.
My Lover Dearest,
It is ironic that I have read so much poetry and so many books in my life, and yet I cannot find the words to describe how much you mean to me.
Sometimes, I find it difficult to believe that someone as wonderful as you would want to be with me. That Iâm allowed to deserve the love that you give me.
My mind works in strange ways, and as much as youâve praised me for it, it can work as a curse as well. I am scared to overwhelm you, to talk your ears off (which would be a shame, because you have beautiful ears) to the point that you grow tired of me.
I never had the intention to cause you pain, or to initiate that youâre any less brilliant than you are. You are the brightest part of my life. I feel grateful every time I get to talk to you, and I would love nothing more than to explain any concept youâd want me to. Iâm sorry for not having understood that before.
I love you. I love you. I have been wanting to tell you this in a special way, please know that I am not just saying this to ask for your forgiveness. I love you.
Sincerely, Spencer
The clock chimed 03.00 a.m. by the time Spencer finished his letter. His hand ached and he could barely keep his eyes open as he stumbled to the bedroom door. He turned the handle, but it wouldnât budge. With a resigned sigh he slid the letter under the door and sat down against it. It didnât take long for exhaustion to overtake him.
The repeated knocking of the door against his back woke him.
âSpencer?â
Your voice sounded like a siren, and he instantly scrambled away from the door, allowing you to open it fully.
You stood there, holding the envelope in your hand as your eyes softened when you glanced over him, mouth forming a small oh. âWhat are you doing here?â you asked in worry.
âThe door was locked,â he answered, voice still hoarse from sleep.
A curse escaped your lips as you pressed your hands against your face. âI am so sorry. I must have fallen asleep with the door still locked.â
Spencerâs lips lifted into a small smile, relieved that you hadnât locked him out intentionally. âItâs okay. Orthopedists actually recommend sleeping on the floor from time to time. Sleeping on a hard surface encourages a more natural position for your spine, which can reduce back pain. It even strengthens certain muscles, so the pressure on your body evens out. As a matter of fact, anthropological studies have shown that-â
He stopped mid-ramble, blushing when he noticed the faint smile tugging on your lips.
âSorry,â he mumbled. âIâll stop,â
âDonât you ever stop,â you replied as you lowered yourself on the ground next to him. You reached for his hands, placing them into your lap.
Spencerâs blush deepened, and he struggled to suppress a grin. Your encouragement reassured him, and he went on about groups in Japan and Tanzania who experience significantly lower rates of back pain due to their minimal use of furniture.
âSpencer,â you gently interrupted after a while.
He blinked at you, seeing the gleam in your eyes as you adoringly stared at him. âHm?â
âI love you too.â
I shouldn't be smiling as much as I am right now
Classroom Talk | Spencer Reid
Summary: Spencer drops your lunch off to your classroom filled with apparent love experts, who then question the man youâre with and tease you two for not being married yetâŠ
A/N: idk why but I just thought of this, itâs adorable though. Not proofread too tired for that. LOL.
BYR(b4 you Reid): light teasing, Spencer getting kind of bullied by teens, and fluff :))
You were at your desk, deep in teacher mode. Grading assignments, updating the grade book, the usual rhythm of a productive day.
You glanced up and saw your students working quietly for once, either reading the latest chapter youâd assigned or scribbling their thoughts in journals. It was that rare magical moment every teacher silently prays for: peace.
Naturally, it didnât last.
There was a knock at the door.
Every single head turned in unison. Including yours.
âHello.â A familiar voice said, soft and polite, peeking into the room like he wasnât about to cause utter chaos.
Spencer.
Your brilliant, shy, awkward boyfriend. Standing in your classroom.
You blinked, stunned. âWhat are you doing here?â You asked, smiling like this was the best little surprise.
âSomeone.â He said, raising a brow and holding your bag up. âForgot their lunch at home.â
You walked over to meet him halfway, shaking your head. âWow, I didnât even realize.â
His hand instinctively went to your waist as he handed you your lunch, you turned to face your students, you immediately regretted it.
Half of them were staring blankly. The other half wore smug little smirks, the kind youâve seen way too many times this year.
You sighed, already sensing the storm brewing. âEveryone, this is Spencer.â You introduced him. He gave an awkward wave and shy smile, very much regretting every life choice that led him to this moment.
âHi.â Came a chorus of teenage politeness, which was immediately shattered by
âIs that your husband?â Silas blurted. Of course it was Silas.
You chuckled. âNo, not my husband.â
âFiancĂ©?â Someone else chimed in.
âBoyfriend.â Spencer said, trying to sound casual.
âOooh!â âAwwsâ âno wayâ erupted from every direction.
Mia raised an eyebrow. âYou have a boyfriend? Why didnât you tell us? We thought you were lonely!â
You blinked. âI-well- I didnât think you needed to know about my personal life.â
âWhy? We always tell you about ours.â
You stared at them. âThatâsâŠtrue, unfortunately.â
âI always thought you and the basketball coach would be cute.â Someone tossed out.
Spencerâs jaw dropped. âExcuse me?â
You stepped in. âOkay! Thatâs enough. Youâre scaring himâ
The class laughed, clearly delighted.
You turned back to Spencer, lowering your voice. âThanks for this. Lunch is in fifteen, have time?â
He smiled. âFor you? Always.â
You motioned to the chair near your desk, and he sat, awkward but trying. You returned to your seat, praying your students would go back to their journals.
Nope.
Oliviaâs hand shot up.
âYes? Olivia?â
âWhy is your boyfriend dressed like heâs coming from a funeral?â
You choked back a laugh, Spencer blinked at you, betrayed.
âWell.â You said sweetly. âSpencer?â
He cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably. âUhâŠmy job?â
âWhat do you do?â
âIâm with the FBI.â He said, a little more confidently. âBehavioral Analysis Unit.â
âBoring.â Someone muttered.
Your head snapped up. âHey! Be nice. His job is actually super important.â You say going to your sweet lovely boyfriendâs defense because only you can pick on him.
âYeah, shut up. Let him talk.â Silas said.
You raised a brow. âAppreciate the support, not the tone.â
Spencer smiled faintly. âWhat we do is analyze criminal behavior to help catch criminals. Itâs called profiling.â
âItâs like psychology.â You added. âItâs really cool.â
âSo you predict what people do? Do me!â Ethan asked.
âUhâŠit doesnât quite work like that.â Spencer replied.
Ethan sighed, immediately unimpressed.
âSo you get to catch criminals?â Mia asked.
âYeah. We do.â Spencer said, nodding.
âCool.â Silas grinned. âDo you see crime scenes? Are they gross?â
âVery.â Spencer said.
And now they were really invested.
âWhatâs the worst youâve ever seen?â Someone asked
Spencer opened his mouth.
âNope!â You interrupted. âDo not answer that.â The class groaned. âSorry, guys.â
âHow long have you guys been together?â Mia asked.
You hesitated. âFour years. Now get back to work.â
âFour years and no ring? Thatâs sad.â Silas said. Your jaw dropped. âExcuse me?â
âAre you guys scared of marriage or something?â Olivia teased. You and Spencer both looked equally offended.
âNo.â You said crossing your arms. âWeâre justâŠcomfortable.â Spencer nodded. âWeâre happy where we are. Right?â He asked, his head snapping to you for confirmation.
You smiled. âRight.â
âWell, if my boyfriend didnât propose after four years, Iâd dump him.â Mia declared. You shook your head. âWhen did this classroom turn into a relationship panel?â
âYeah.â Spencer added. âHow old are you guys? Fourteen? Fifteen?â
The room broke into laughter.
Finally, the bell rang. âThank god.â You muttered, watching them pack up.
A few waved at Spencer, others giggled as they walked past. And then Olivia stopped right next to him.
âSheâs a lovely woman. You should really put a ring on her finger.â
Then she was gone.
Spencer turned to you, you were already laughing.
âSheâs not wrong.â You said making your way to him, grabbing his hand. âI am pretty lovely.â
âI am never stepping foot in this classroom again.â He said. âThat was more stressful than interrogating a serial killer.â
âOh, come on. I think they liked you.â
âReally? Because that comment about the basketball couch felt very personal.â
You laughed and nudged him. âYouâre focused on the wrong thing.â
âWhat should I be focusing on?â
âMarrying me.â
He paused, then smiled. âNoted.â
You walked toward your classroom door, twisting the lock. Spencer was still by your desk, looking mildly traumatized.
âAre you okay?â You asked, trying not to laugh.
âIâve been shot at less aggressively than I was questioned in here.â He replied, deadpan. âAnd I sensed one of your students wanting to fight me. I saw the glint in their eyes.â
You laughed. âWell, you held your own. Iâm proud of you.â
You moved a chair next to Spencer, and took a seat, unwrapping your sandwich. He watched you for a second, then leaned in with a smile.
âSoâŠfour years no ring?â He said, repeating Silasâ line like he was testing it out loud.
You narrowed your eyes. âDonât you start.â
âHey, Iâm just saying. The experts have spoken. Weâre on thin ice.â
âYouâre right, should I just elope with the basketball coach?â
Spencer gave a dramatic gasp. âI knew it.â
You nodded. âHe is tall, and charming.â
âWow. Okay, now I am scared.â
You smiled, nudging your foot against his. âYou know I donât need a ring to feel secure with you, right?â
âI know.â He said softly, reaching out to brush your hand. âBut alsoâŠI donât not want to marry you someday.â
Your heart did a flip. You tried to play it cool, like your knees didnât suddenly feel like jello.
âYeah?â You asked, voice softer.
He nodded. âYeah. JustâŠnot because Olivia told me to. Although she is very convincing.â
âShe is. Probably runs the underground student government.â
âDefinitely. But Iâve thought about it before. And I want to do it the right way. Youâd deserve somethingâŠmeaningful. Not pressured by a bunch of freshman armed with sass and curiosity.â
You grinned. âI do love something meaningful.â
He leaned in slightly, teasing. âSoâŠno courthouse wedding tomorrow after work?â
You thought about it. âOnly if we go matching in some ridiculous couples costume.â
âThat actually sounds incredible.â
You both laughed, the weight of the moment balanced by the natural ease between you. You leaned your head on his shoulder and exhaled.
âI liked seeing you here.â You murmured. âEven if they grilled you like a suspect.â
He chuckled. âNext time, Iâm bringing backup. Maybe Morgan.â
âOh please, if Morgan walked in here, half the girls would faint.â
He smiled, agreeing with you.
You then grabbed his hand. âThank you for bringing my lunch.â
âAnytime. Next time Iâll bring a ring, just to keep them happy.â
You lifted your head. âIf you propose in my classroom, I will throw a dry erase marker at you.â
âRomantic.â He whispered, his smile never leaving his face, you looked at him, and he kissed your forehead.
âI love you.â
âI love you most.â
SO ADORABLE WTH
- Tag List ~
@alastorssimp @sleepysongbirdsings @khxna
Love, love, love đ€đ€
Closer
Spencer reid x reader oneshot fluff
Wc: 1k
Summary: You say across from spencer when you usually sit beside him during dates
It had been a long week for Spencer Reid. The BAU had been running nonstop, cases back-to-back, with barely a moment to breathe. But now, as the weekend arrived, it was time for his favorite part of the weekâhis date with you.
It was a tradition at this point. Every Friday, youâd both go to that quiet little cafe downtown, the one with the cozy booths and the scent of freshly brewed coffee in the air. Spencer loved those moments. Not for the foodâthough he did enjoy itâbut for the time he got to spend with you, the person he cherished more than anything else in the world.
You had been dating for a while now, and the routine was simple. He would always sit beside you in the booth, his long fingers gently wrapped around yours as he talked about his day. It was always the same, and yet, every time felt like a new adventure in itself, hearing him speak with that curious excitement about the latest case or random facts heâd picked up from his research. It was comforting, familiar, and perfect.
But tonight was different.
You sat down across from him, without thinking much about it. You were still adjusting your jacket when you took your seat, completely unaware of how it made Spencer feel.
At first, he didnât say anything. He just smiled that warm, shy smile of his, his eyes flickering down at the table before glancing up at you. The conversation began like it always did, about a case he had been working on, but it felt... distant.
The space between you felt strange, like a gap he didnât know how to bridge.
You didnât notice anything was off, but Spencer was growing increasingly uncomfortable. It wasnât that he didnât want to talk to you; it was that he *did*âhe always didâbut something felt wrong when you werenât sitting beside him. He was used to the closeness, the soft weight of your hand in his. He craved it, needed it even.
He tried to focus on his words, explaining a complex case, but his mind kept wandering. He wanted to reach across the table and hold your hand, feel your fingers intertwining with his, but it felt... wrong, in a way. It felt like a boundary had been drawn without him meaning for it to happen.
His leg bounced under the table, a nervous habit heâd developed when he was agitated, but tonight it seemed worse. He looked up at you, seeing the concerned, attentive look in your eyes as you listened to him. You were there, your focus entirely on him, but the physical space between you was heavier than heâd expected.
You tilted your head slightly. âSpence, is everything okay? You seem⊠a little distracted.â
He blinked, snapping out of his internal spiral. âOh, uh, yeah. Sorry, Iâm fine. Just... thinking.â
There was a beat of silence, and then, without really thinking, you reached for the salt shaker on the table. You were only inches from his hand, but it felt like miles. You didnât notice the way his eyes followed your movements, how his hand clenched slightly by his side.
âI didnât realize,â he began, his voice softer than usual, âbut... I... um, I usually sit next to you.â
Your eyebrows furrowed slightly in confusion. âWhat do you mean?â
Spencer shifted in his seat, his fingers tapping against the edge of his glass, and he struggled to find the right words. âI mean, usually, we... sit next to each other. And I just... feel closer to you that way.â
You blinked, the realization dawning on you, and you smiled softly, feeling the tiniest flicker of guilt in your chest. âOh, Spence. Iâm sorry, I didnât even think about it.â
He shrugged a little, not wanting to make a big deal out of it, but his cheeks flushed just a hint. âItâs okay, itâs just... I didnât realize how much I missed it until now.â He hesitated, his eyes glancing at your hand, almost like he was afraid to ask. âI guess... I like being close to you. Even if Iâm a little... um, well, a bit of a germaphobe, sometimes.â
You couldnât help but smile at his words. Spencerâs vulnerability was one of the things you loved most about him. He was so incredibly intelligent, yet sometimes he had this shy, almost childlike way of revealing his true feelings.
Slowly, you slid your chair closer, closing the gap between the two of you, until your knees touched. The simple gesture made Spencer's face brighten, and he relaxed almost immediately, his breath catching in a small, relieved sigh.
âThere,â you said softly, your voice low, warm. âBetter?â
Spencer looked at you with wide, grateful eyes, his smile blooming like spring after a long winter. âMuch better.â
Without another word, you reached across the table, gently taking his hand in yours. The warmth of his skin against yours felt like coming home, and Spencerâs fingers curled around yours with a quiet, satisfied sigh.
âI like this,â he said quietly, looking down at your joined hands.
âMe too,â you agreed, feeling the sense of contentment that only Spencer could give you. âIâm sorry I didnât realize.â
He shook his head, his smile never faltering. âYou donât have to apologize. I just wanted to be close to you. And... I guess I didnât know how to ask.â
You squeezed his hand, leaning in just a little closer. âNext time, Iâll make sure to sit next to you.â
Spencer grinned, his eyes twinkling with that familiar spark. âNext time?â
âYeah,â you said, with a playful glint in your eyes. âI think I could get used to the fact that youâre a little possessive of our personal space.â
Spencerâs laughter filled the space between you, a soft, genuine sound that made your heart swell. It was moments like these that reminded you just how much you adored him. Even in his quirks, even in his need for closeness, Spencer was exactly what you needed.
As the night continued, you both sat side by side, hands firmly entwined, and for once, the world felt like it had stopped moving, just for the two of you.
The space between you was gone, and you were exactly where you were meant to beâclose enough.
So cuteee đ€
helloođ«§đ«§
omg i just got this idea! what about rafe getting jealous bc a little boy is flirting with kook!reader like he telling her shes really pretty and to be her gf, and rafe is laughing at first but when the little boy get more attention of reader than him he just đ€š and he gets all protective bc of a LITTLE BOY. Idk i think is funny do whatever you feel comfortable <3333
hii!! this was sooo fun to write!!
you and rafe were spending the afternoon at the country club, lounging by the pool when a little boyâprobably no older than sixâwandered up to you with a determined look. rafe barely noticed at first, too busy scrolling through his phone, but when the kid cleared his throat and tugged on your chair, you looked down with a soft smile.
âyouâre really pretty,â the boy announced, crossing his arms.
rafe glanced up, smirking. oh, this is gonna be funny.
âaw, thank you!â you beamed, playfully ruffling the kidâs hair.
the boy huffed, clearly on a mission. âyou should be my girlfriend.â
rafe let out a laugh, shaking his head. âalright, kid, relax.â
but the boy ignored him completely, stepping closer to you. âiâll take you on a date. we can get ice cream. my mom says girls like when boys buy them stuff.â
your heart melted at how serious he was, and you giggled, playing along. âthat sounds like a sweet date!â
meanwhile, rafe was watching the exchange with his arms crossed, eyebrows furrowing. at first, he was entertainedâbut now? not so much. his jaw clenched when you leaned in, actually giving this tiny threat more attention than him.
âalright, buddy,â rafe cut in, voice sharp but amused. âthink you should go find your mom now.â
the kid barely blinked. âno. iâm talking to my girlfriend.â
rafeâs smirk dropped. âyour what now?â
âyou heard me,â the little boy challenged, puffing his chest like he was really about to square up with a six-foot-something kook prince.
you tried to stifle your laughter, but rafe shot you a glare.
âlisten, little man,â rafe said, leaning forward with an almost condescending smirk. âsheâs mine. so, unless you can drive, pay for actual dates, and fight off anyone who looks at her wrong, iâd say youâre outta luck.â
the kid squinted at him. âmy dad fights people all the time.â
rafe scoffed. âyeah? whatâs he do?â
âheâs a lawyer.â
rafe sat back, exhaling sharply through his nose. âright. of course, he is.â
you lost it, full-on laughing now. âokay, okay,â you said, patting the little boyâs head. âyouâre very sweet, but I think my boyfriendâs getting jealous.â
âi am not jealous,â rafe immediately shot back, crossing his arms tighter.
the little boy just shrugged, utterly unfazed. âiâll come back when you break up.â and with that, he strutted away like he hadnât just ruined rafeâs entire day.
you turned to rafe, still giggling, and poked his arm. âyou so were jealous.â
âof a six-year-old?â rafe scoffed. âplease.â but the way he pulled you into his lap, gripping your waist just a little tighter than usual? yeah. he was totally jealous.
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I love every single word of this fic
Lodestar | s.reid
You call Spencer to tell him you've gone into labor just as he closes in on an unsub. He's determined to make it back to you in time.
Pairing: fem!reader x spencer reid Contains: fluff!, established relationship, husband!spencer, canon typical violence, reader is afraid of needles, epidural, pregnancy and labor and birth (not really described in detail lmao but does happen), girldad!spencer (supremacy), astrophysicist!reader, s12!Spencer but pre-prison, first part is from spencer's perspective and the second is from reader's Length: ~2.1k Note: this started as a joke and then became the silly "prequel" (idk it's just the same reader and daughter) to Star-Stuff, but it can completely stand alone!
Theyâre only three miles away from the dairy farm when Spencerâs phone rings.
Spencer nearly doesnât answer. JJ holds her phone out over the carâs center console so he can listen to Emilyâs update from the backseat, and at the rate Lukeâs driving, theyâll be on the grounds within minutes.Â
And, if the profile is correct, theyâre already running out of time. The rest of the team is too far behind. Spencer canât afford to lose focus.
But you're the only person who would be calling him right now, and instinct forces him to answer.
âHi,â he whispers.
In the rearview mirror, Luke furrows his brows at him.
âHey!â you answer, and the forced pep in your tone gives Spencer pause. âHowâs the case?âÂ
âUh, itâsâI canât really talk rightâhold on, are you okay?âÂ
âYes, yes, sorry. Everything is fine. I justââ you cut yourself off.
Spencerâs heart races. âWhatâs wrong?â
âNothing,â you breathe.
But he knows youâre lying. Your voice is strained, shaky.Â
He says your nameâstripped from its usual softness, now a demand.
JJ twists in the passenger seat and mouths something to him, but Spencer turns to the window as if it might give him privacy. Through the glass, he watches the overgrown grazing fields rush by.
Two miles away.
âOkay, okay,â you say. âSo, Iâm fine.â A pause. âBut⊠my water just broke, and I think Iâm in labor.â
Now, his heart fucking stops.
âWhat? Are you positive?â he asks.
âWell, Iâm pretty certain that I didnât just piss myself on our living room floor.â
âYou might have!â he says desperately. âIncontinence is extremely common in the third trimester! The fetus presses on your bladder and weakens your pelvic floor, and remember when youââ
âSpencer!â
âSorry! Iâmââ driving up to a dairy farm that was recently run out of business by an industrial dairy processing plant that undercut their prices, and the former owner is now systematically killing all of the employees that left his farm to work at the plant, including his own daughter, who he is holding captive somewhere on the farm and may have already killed. You knowâsmaller family farms make up the vast majority of farms in the US, but are responsible for less than 20% of production. Industrial agriculture operations, despite being fewer in number, control the market entirely. Anyway, this is the best day of my life, and I love you so much.
He still has the good sense to not say all that.
âAre you having contractions?â he asks instead.
In the front, JJâs eyes widen, and Luke mutters, âShit.âÂ
The carâs headlights illuminate a dirt road lined by wooden fences. A weather worn sign that says âWalker Family Farmâ swings in the wind.
One mile.
âYes, but theyâre not that strong.â
âWhen did they start?â
âLike. A few hours ago, butââ
âA few hours ago?!âÂ
âBut itâs still just early labor! Theyâre not evenââ You cut yourself off again. ââOooh my goooood,â you groan tightly.
âGo to the hospital!â
âItâsâitâs fine! First time births usually have pretty long labors, soââ
They pass the farmâs visitorâs center.
He says your name again, urgently, desperately. âPlease.â
âI know. I justââ Your voice wavers. âIâm⊠scared. I donât want to do this without you. I donât think I can.â
Spencer swallows. âIâll be there.â
âButââ
âI have to go. I love you. Iâll see you soon.â
He hangs up, because Luke has reached the end of the road, and there isnât time to say everything that he wants to say.
The car crunches to a stop on the gravel drive, headlights cutting through the dark. Beyond them, the dairy farm sprawls in eerie silenceâbarn doors yawning open, cattle stalls ghostly under fluorescents that still flicker despite the farmâs abandonment. Behind the silo, the creamery hums with electricity.
JJ looks back at him. âSpence, are youââ
âI looked at the blueprints back at the station. The creamery has two ground level entrances on the north and south walls and a cellar door in the middle of the east wall. Weâll cover ground faster and draw less attention if we split up,â he says. âIâll cover the north entrance.â
He doesnât let either of them get a word in before heâs running out of the vehicle.
Inside the creamery, the temperature rises, a sharp contrast to the frigid January air, and the air is perfumed by something sour, rotten. Between pasteurization vats are piles of rusted equipment jutting out like broken ribs, metal piping half-submerged in the shadows. As he makes his way through the labyrinth, he sees a still functional pressure gauge on one of the vats twitching into the yellow zone.
That faint mechanical hum runs through the buildingâgenerators still keeping something alive. The pipes running along the walls, between vats, rattle.
Thenâa soft, muffled sob.
Spencer takes a right and his flashlight illuminates James Walker standing behind his daughter, Millie, one hand clapped over her mouth, the other, holding a skinning knife to her throat.
âLet her go, James,â Spencer says, revolver aimed straight ahead.
James takes a labored breath. The blade at Millieâs throat glints, a thin reflection of light dancing along the steel.
âI donât think so,â James responds.
âJames,â Spencer tries again, taking a careful step forward. âI understand youâre angry. They took your livelihoodââ
âNoâno.â Jamesâ hand tightens on the hilt, and Maggie sobs. âThey took my life!â
Spencer has seen grief manifest in hundreds of ways throughout his career. Some men turn it inward to let it hollow them out. Others forge it into righteous indignation and wield it like a blade. And James, hands shaking, eyes wild with devoted fervor, is the latter.
This isnât about work. It isnât even about family or betrayal or revenge.
This is about legacy, something passed through blood and dirt, roots sprawling deep beneath the earth to last centuries.
Cut down a tree, and it will grow again.
Dig it out by the roots, and the ground caves in, leaving only a hollow, a scar in the earth easily paved over, as if nothing had grown there at all.
But legacy is more than rootsâitâs the seeds carried away by the wind, shaped by their origin, but still meant to grow into something new.
James doesnât see that, and now, heâs willing to cut down his own future to avenge his past, ready to sacrifice his daughter at the altar of his loss rather than let her become something beyond him.
As if she is not his legacy, too.
Spencer knows that heâs supposed to deescalate first, but that takes time, time heâs not willing to spend on James Walker.
He has his own legacy to think aboutâhis family.
Somewhere else in the creamery, something clangs against a vat. It draws Jamesâ attention for half a second, and when it does, Spencer shifts his aim and fires.
The bullet slams into a pipe running behind Jamesâs head.
Steam erupts, shrieking into the air, and James jerks away, raising his arm against the blast.
Millie wrenches free, stumbling, gasping, and suddenly, JJ is there pulling her to safety.
James reels and turns to Spencer with his blade raised, but before he can even take a step, Luke surges forward and pries the blade from his grasp.
By the time theyâre escorting him out of the creamery, the rest of the team and local PD finally arrive.
Half an hour later, heâs back on the jet, staring out the window, counting the stars that seem to pale in comparison to the one guiding him home.
When Spencer rushes into the hospital room, youâre standing, gripping the bed rail like itâs the only thing keeping you tethered to the ground. The moment you see himâbreathless, wide-eyed, and grinning (asshole)âyou grit out, âWhat the fuck took so long?â
Spencer, to his credit, takes a second to reassess.
He stops short beside you, hands slightly outstretched but clearly trying to determine if you want to be touched.
You do not.
âItâwe had toââ He shakes his head. âIt doesnât matter. Iâm here. I love you.â
âI love you, too, obviously.â You glare up at him from beneath your sweat beaded brow. âBut If you ever hang up the phone while Iâm in labor again, I swear on my life, I will become a serial killer out of spite.â
âNoted.â His expression softens. âWhat can I do?â
âUmââ You squeeze your eyes shut and take a deep breath. âYou want to do this instead? Do a seahorse-type thing?â
âIf I had a brood pouch, I would do it in a heartbeat.â
You laughâbreathy and high pitched. âA what?â
âA brood pouch! Thatâs where male seahorses fertilize and incubate the eggs after the female deposits them. Itâs actuallyââ
Another contraction rips through you, and you squeeze your eyes shut, gripping the rail even tighter as you let out a quiet groan. When it passes, you pant and open your eyes.
âOh my god,â you breathe.
Spencer scans the screen with your vitals. âThat was sixty-two seconds. How oftenââ
âFour minutes,â you hiss.
âOkay, have you spoken to the anesthesiologist about the epiduââ
âNot doing that.â
He pauses and blinks. âAre you sure? I thought you wanted toââ
âChanged my mind.â You keep your eyes on your fists clenched around the guard rail. âItâsâitâs fine.â
Spencer pauses again, and you can feel him assessing you. âI just want to make sureââ
âItâs a giant fucking needle in my spine,â you rush out.Â
âTechnically the needle itself doesnât stay in your spine.â
Heâs the love of your life. Heâs also, apparently, your greatest adversary. You glare at him and hope he telepathically gets that message.
âThe risk of complications is extremely rare!â he says. âParalysis is only one in a million, and permanent nerve damage is one in 23,500 to 50,000!â
âOh, well, thank god for that! No!â
Spencerâs mouth opens. Then closes.
You groan softly and lean down, resting your head against the cool metal of the guard rail. âI would rather calculate the gravitational pull of a black hole on a rogue planet with nothing but a notebook and a pen than do this right now.â
You expect Spencer to comment on it, say something upbeat, like what an interesting challengeâhowever impossibleâthat would be.
Instead, he just brushes your hair away from your forehead and says, âYou could do it if you wanted to. And you can do this, too.â
You keep your head down to hide the quiver in your bottom lip.
After twenty minutes, you decide that your crippling fear of needles isnât so crippling, afterall.Â
And then, itâs a waiting game.
Untilâ
She arrives with the sun, and nothing else matters anymore.
Nothing.
Not the pain, or the frustration of waiting, or the fear. Not even the terrifying, all-consuming weight of your official parenthood.
Maiaâimpossibly tiny, infinitesimally small Maia, just a speck in the grand expanse of the universe, and yet, sheâs everything.
When sheâs bundled and settled on your chest, you and Spencer just stare at her. He sits in a chair beside your bed but rests his head next to yours.Â
âSheâs so wrinkly,â you whisper, voice horse. âLike a little alien.â
Spencer huffs a laugh through his nose. âDonât call her an alien.â
âCanât help it. Sheâs straight stardust. Carbon, oxygen, hydrogenâthe legacy of ancient supernovae.â You run a finger down her cheek, and she coos in her sleep. âThe universe spent billions of years making her,â you murmur.
Spencerâs quiet for several moments. Then, he tilts his head to kiss your cheek. âShe was worth the wait.â
You blink, throat tightening. âEverythingâs going to be different now,â you whisper. âOur lives are⊠Do you⊠will we be okay at this?â
You expect a statistic, a comforting fact, in response.
Instead, Spencer murmurs. âI donât know. I think we can only try.â
The gravitational orbits of two celestial bodies are easy to predict. Introduce a third, and the system unravels into chaosâunpredictable, unknowable, its future mapped only by imperfect simulations that can never quite capture reality.Â
Itâs a delicate dance on the edge of collapse.
But here, now, it has never felt so fragile.
Or so precious.
âOur very own three-body problem,â you muse.Â
Spencer breathes a laugh. âThereâs no closed-form solution to parenting, is there?â
âNerd,â you whisper.
He doesnât argue. He just squeezes your arm, his thumb tracing slow, steady circles against your skin.
For all the unknowns still to come, for all the unpredictable forces pulling at your lives, you know at least one thing will remain constantâher, this, your family.
And somehow, even without a closed-form solution, the math still works out.
How many times do I have to say this:
I LOVE BUCKY
Courting
Synopsis: Bucky is a man from a different time. It shows when you start âgoing steadyâ and honestly, you love it. Alternatively; Bucky uses 40âs dating etiquette to woo you, and surprises you with a modern turn of phrase.
cw: itâs set in a vague timeline where itâs just before cabnw but also during fatws so no thunderbolts spoilers! Bucky is a FLIRT, reader is a little shy, anxiety representation, lots of casual getting to know you, going on a date flirting, Buckyâs serious about reader tho!
word count: 4.4k
Bucky Barnes prides himself on being able to court a woman. He really does. He knows all the rules, knows all the things to say, and it doesnât hurt that he can flirt his way through any conversation.
You and Bucky met at the Smithsonian when Bucky was missing Steve a little too much and popped in just to get a glimpse of his best friend again.
You were by the Isaiah Bradley display, reading through before murmuring under your breath, âThose poor men.â
Bucky hadnât meant to eavesdrop like that, but there was so much concern in your voice and he had to say something lest you think they all suffered â looking back, maybe he wasnât the best person to break that news to you.
âWe didnât all suffer so bad.â
You had gasped when you noticed him, hand to your chest. âYouâre Bucky Barnes,â you weigh your words before adding, âSteveâs best friend.â
That alone had won him over. You didnât bring up the Winter Soldier, or that Bucky was as traumatised as super soldiers went. Just that he was Steveâs best friend.
âYeah,â he nodded, âThis your first time at the Smithsonian?â
You shake your head, a little heat flushing up your cheeks. âI come every couple of weeks, to see if they have any new stuff to add to your plaques. Itâs kinda messed up what they did to all of you.â
Bucky smiles, shaking his head. It is messed up, he knows that. All the super soldiers besides John Walker know how messed up it was. âWe came out alright, made it to the 21st century after all.â
You tilt your head to the side, âI guess thatâs true.â
Buckyâs eyes light up. âMade it this far to meet pretty girls too.â
Your cheeks flame and Bucky chuckles, you chat a bit more before he gives you his number.
It takes you two days to text him. Youâd been overthinking it, if you should or shouldnât. In the end, if he ignored you at least youâd have tried.
It turns out Bucky didnât give you his number just to be polite, because he answered your text immediately.
The first time he had used his courting experience was when heâd made it a point to establish the fact that he wanted to take you out every second Friday of the month.
He had it in his head that the effort had to be shown and then followed through the entire time and after two days, he was determined to show you that he was serious.
âIâm free every other Friday, if thatâs good with you doll.â
You had responded four minutes later after looking at your phone in shock and a little bit of bewilderment, when was the last time a man was so forward but not in a pushy way?
âItâs perfect as long as work doesnât bleed into my weekendsâ
From there Bucky had planned three of the dates meticulously, going over places and ideas in his head until heâd settled on the best three according to himself.
The first date was at a new diner near his apartment, one that Sam said did really good milkshakes and Bucky hadnât been able to let the idea go.
âItâs nothing too fancy, but Sam said itâs a good spot.â
Youâd worn a pretty skirt and blouse, and Bucky had worn a grey henley and jeans.
âYou look gorgeous,â Bucky was full of compliments as youâd learn as the afternoon went on. He dished them out easily and most of the time you pretended not to hear him because he had a sort of pleased look on his face every time you stammered to keep the conversation going, and that in itself had in your stomach in knots.
He even brought you a bouquet of red tulips which had sat beside you on the sticky diner table all day.
âOh they have milkshakes!â You say excitedly when you catch a server walking past.
Buckyâs heart sores. God bless the forties for making that a thing.
âWanna try one?â
You look up at him, eyes brimming with hopefulness, âWill we do the cheesy sharing from the same cup?â
Bucky leans back in the booth seat, blue eyes boring into you. âAnd the same straw if you really want to, doll.â
Heâs so fucking smooth, because you canât do anything but nod now that his gaze is fixed on you.
Deciding what milkshake had taken nearly five minutes, back and forth between what was a classic flavor and why strawberry was definitely not good (Bucky was very offended) and then settling on a Shamrock Shake even though St. Patrickâs day had long passed.
Sharing the milkshake sitting across from each other was more intimate than you had expected it to be, (you hadnât ended up using one straw but just the eye contact was enough to fluster you). Bucky walked you to your car after paying for dinner, very offended that you tried to pay half of the bill, and opened the door for you. When you had gotten in, he leant a little into your space, âDid you have a good time, doll?â
Your heart pounds. You had a great time, Bucky was easy to be around, even with your shyness.
âI did, thank you Bucky. Did you?â
He smiled, âDonât see how I couldnât with you as company.â In your sputtering for an answer Buckyâs heart beat a little faster, you were the cutest thing ever.
âAny opposition to a gala for our next date?â
You raise your eyebrows. âIâm not the biggest fan of crowds but I donât see why it couldnât be fun. Is it for the new Captain America thing?â
Bucky smiles, âIâll text you the details. Drive safe, doll.â
The gala was fun even if a little anxiety inducing when you note the number of people there.
Buckyâs good though, he doesnât give you a moment alone to feel that anxiety or have anyone come up to you to ask you a million questions.
Itâs a veteran gala and Bucky didnât want to go through that alone because he was getting another medal post Thanos; not that he really wanted it.
That night, as you sat beside him at one of the tables, it was hard to ignore the feel of his hand grasping your ankle and stroking it.
His palm is warm against your skin but you can feel the twitch in his fingers.
âWe can leave early if you really donât want to get it, Bucky.â
He turns to you with a smile, his cheeks a little warm when you meet his eyes. âNo, I can handle it, doll.â
You tut, shaking your head. âYeah but you look like youâre gonna pass out waiting for them to call your name.â
He rolls his eyes, âI do not.â He can actually feel the acid churning in his stomach.
In the end, the âmedalâ is Bucky partially funding a veteran support group in honor of his friend Sam Wilson, whoâs the new Captain America, and Steve Rogers. He much prefers that sort of medal.
It was only after Bucky had gotten you home from the gala that you noticed the slip of paper in your clutch.
It had the name of the diner you and Bucky had gone to a week and a half ago, but on the backside of the paper was his semi messy scrawl.
You looked gorgeous tonight. Purpleâs definitely your colour, doll. I know itâs only the second date, but youâre all I think about most days. I wanna see you again, but I know tonight was a lot with all those people. Sleep well, doll. Dream of me if youâd like.
Yours,
James.
That had made you smile so hard your cheeks ached. He signed it with his actual name, not the cute nickname he got so many years ago, his real, government name and that was not something that went unnoticed by you.
Immediately you changed his name in your phone to James with a little heart next to it.
Youâre not really sure youâre sold on Buckyâs affections towards you, till the third date when Bucky pulls up to your apartment with another bouquet of flowers, peonies this time in pretty pinks and soft yellows.
âBucky, these are gorgeous!â You had rushed back into your house to add them to the vase with the other flowers he had dropped off for you on your doorstep last week.
You can hear him chuckling in your doorway as you flit about.
âWas there any traffic?â you asked over the sound of your tap filling the vase.
âNot too much, but it is lunchtime on a Saturday.â
You had mentioned to Bucky a little bit ago that there was a perfect spot in the park near your house for a picnic now that New York had finally warmed up, and the next text you had received was Bucky asking if you had any nut allergies.
It wasnât your usual date day, but Bucky had pleaded and begged just a little (although he really hadnât had to), and had even sent you a photo of the most gorgeous picnic blanket and you were agreeing faster than anything.
âIâm ready to go now.â Seeing Bucky there leaning in the archway of your kitchen makes you feel so many things that you canât help it when you lean up and kiss just under his jaw before walking towards your door after snagging your picnic basket from on the counter.
âComing, Bucky?â
He only shakes his head, some of his hair falling into his eyes as he follows behind you. You swear you hear him mutter, âNot a shy thing at all,â but you donât say anything because your nerve has worn off and you actually canât believe you really kissed his cheek.
Bucky hadnât spared an expense on your picnic. He had gotten peaches, plums, two different cheeses, apples, grapes (black ones; your favourite) and even a bottle of sparkling wine.
You had brought sandwiches and salt and vinegar potato chips (those became Buckyâs new favourites), a sketchbook and your camera.
âWere picnics something you did a lot?â you ask Bucky as he makes you a plate - crackers, cheese, some of the fruit and half the sandwich you packets.
Bucky squints at you as he slices a wedge of the plum free from the stone. âIf it was, would you be jealous, doll?â
You shake your head, some of the peach juice dribbling down your wrist. Buckyâs quick but gentle as he thumbs it away and presses his thumb to his lips. Youâre so grateful that his hands arenât on you to feel how fast your pulse hammers.
âIâm just curious what the dating customs of the 40âs looked like.â Itâs a miracle your voice remains even.
Bucky nods like he doesnât really believe you. âI think I went on one, but there was never really a good time for more.â
You wince, you had forgotten that heâd gotten drafted.
Your reaction makes Bucky laugh, âIâm glad I get to find out if I really like them now though. Thereâs a lot more to enjoy about picnics now without all the smog.â
His teeth snap through the wedge of the plum before he continues, âI can see my date better, which feels like an incredible plus.â
Damn Buckyâs flirting.
You spend all evening at the park, and itâs so fun because Bucky poses for some of your pictures and then takes some of you and when you pose for a few together and Bucky stares at you thereâs a sort of stillness that overcomes you.
His eyes bore into yours, the blue of them stopping you where your finger is poised over the button to snap the photo.
âTake the photo doll,â he whispers, his lips hovering near yours as he reaches up and presses your finger down just before leaning all the way in, pressing your lips together.
Buckyâs quick to take the camera from your hand after, setting it on the blanket and cupping your cheek to deepen the kiss.
Itâs not too long, but itâs more than a peck and when he pulls away you can barely open your eyes.
âWas that okay?â Bucky whispers, the hand still cupping your face warm where it rests.
âWhere did you learn to kiss like that?â his laugh rocks you as you press your forehead into his shoulder. âI donât think you were really frozen in ice all that time, James Barnes.â
Bucky cups the back of your head as his laughs die down. âWhatever you want to believe, honey.â
Bucky gets to your house just after sunset, and you let him walk you to your front door. You donât really want the date to end, but youâre tired and you have to imagine so is he.
âI had a really nice evening, Bucky.â
He smiles, a hand on your lower back as he stands in front of you. âSo did I,â you turn to open the door but he stops you.
âIâve gotta go out of town for a little bit, so weâre gonna have to rain check next Fridayâs date.â
You hold onto the sleeve of his Henley before he can step back, âIs everything alright?â
Bucky nods, âYeah just some stuff I have to deal with.â
âWinter soldier stuff?â You nearly whisper the words, not wanting to upset Bucky. He only nods with a soft smile. âBe careful okay?â
âYou donât want to be my nurse if I get hurt, doll? Thatâs harsh.â
You laugh, shaking your head at him. âI just donât want you to get hurt.â
Buckyâs chest aches at your care for him. Itâs been a long while since heâs been given that kind of affection.
âIâll be careful, doll.â
âGood.â
Bucky leans in and presses a kiss just at the corner of your mouth, âGoodnight doll, lock your doors.â He reminds you like youâre not a woman in New York City, but it still makes you smile and your chest goes a little gooey.
Bucky doesnât move from your doorstep till he hears your locks click into place.
-
Buckyâs been gone for a week and a half already and you canât help but miss him.
Youâve been chatting back and forth and youâve even started sending him songs to listen to. Heâs got a very limited list of favourites that youâve made it your mission to resolve.
You find another note in your handbag when you decided against texting Bucky and cleaned your cupboards instead.
It was in your bag from the picnic date, and you smiled when you noticed his handwriting on another receipt from the grocery where he got the cheese.
I hope you find this when Iâm gone and youâre missing me; I know you are, doll, itâs okay.
I miss you too and I havenât left yet.
When I get back Iâll make it up to you, I swear. Maybe weâll go somewhere quiet again? Or I saw theyâre reopening one of those antique places with all those retro trinkets; I could show what I used to have at home. Show you what I prefer now.
Keep locking your doors, honey. I should send you new flowers, the old ones will be dead soon.
Yours,
James.
Buckyâs very good at these, these little notes that leave you smiling and giddy like a fool.
You pull out your phone, you have to text him now.
I got your note. What was your favourite âtrinketâ?
Bucky answers only three minutes later.
My sister used to have a silver jewellery box that I had the pleasure of filling every month.
You smile at that, heâs always been a provider it seems.
Another chime comes from your phone.
We also had a gramophone that played the clearest music Iâve ever heard.
You roll your eyes.
Youâre such an old man.
Iâm not offended, doll. A pretty girl Iâm seeing told me recently Iâm not old at all.
Even miles away heâs got you grinning like an idiot with a racing pulse.
You canât say anything to that and your thoughts take you to what a perfect gentleman heâs been to you. Bucky opens your doors, drives you home and waits till you get into your house before driving off. You think you might be falling for him, and rapidly.
Heâs still gone by Monday and youâre missing him hard, only for the girls you work with to giggle before coming to find you.
âThese were dropped for you,â they hand you a huge bouquet of red and white tube roses and a card.
Itâs not Buckyâs handwriting but itâs from him,
Sorry Iâm still not back, doll. I should just be gone for another day. Donât miss me too much, yeah? I need a few kisses when I get back to make up for all this time away. I listened to that song you recommended, it was good. How do I make a playlist?
Yours,
James.
The note had you blushing and extremely flustered. Your coworkers noticed it immediately.
âAre you two going steady?â
You regret telling them who youâd been going out with. When they leave, youâre stuck with the realisation of how different Bucky is to the men youâve dated before.
Itâs a small thing, but you hardly think any of them got you flowers as consistently as he does, and you donât think youâve ever received such thoughtful bouquets.
You called Bucky when you got home, happy to hear his voice.
âThank you for the flowers, Bucky.â
âYouâre welcome, doll.â
You have the bouquet from today on your bedside table and smile when you spot it after changing into your pajamas.
âYou caused quite a scene when they got delivered.â
You can hear the amusement in his words. âOh yeah?â
âYeah, the girls I work with brought them to me. They were very impressed by the size of the bouquet, Barnes.â
âIâm just concerned about what you think of me.â Was his answer and after that you couldnât get a full sentence out of you.
Heâs so open with his feelings towards you itâs scary, it makes your heart race but you also know heâs not just saying it. He means it and that makes you fall just a little more for Bucky.
âYouâre sweet.â Is all you can manage, your face heated with a blush.
âSam and I are finishing this up tonight, so I should be able to see you when we get back.â
You donât know if youâre reading into his words, but Bucky sounds relieved at the prospect of seeing you soon.
âIsnât it going to be a dayâs long flight?â
âAnd I can see you right after I land, honey. So long as itâs not midnight or while youâre gonna be sleeping.â
Bucky Barnes isnât good for your heart with the way he just wholly shows you how much he wants to spend time with you.
âDo you still need help with your playlist?â
He huffs, âSam showed me. Heâs not a good teacher though, was snippy the whole time; youâd think heâd remember I was in ice.â
You laugh, âIâll show you when you get back, babe.â
Bucky doesnât say anything about the pet name, but for the rest of the phone call he doesnât respond unless you use it.
Itâs two days before heâs back and Bucky drives straight over to see you.
Heâs at your door a few hours after you get home from work, and when you open the door to see him, heâs there with a single rose in his hand and a tired smile on his face.
âIs it possible you got prettier while I was gone?â He leans against your doorway.
âYou look dead on your feet, Bucky. Come inside.â you lead him to your sofa, watching him move with heavy but careful steps all the way through your living room.
Buckyâs movements are measured, not a single action wasted as he takes off his boots and socks and detaches his metal arm.
âI really missed you,â he sighs as he lays on your sofa, eyes shut as he takes a long breath.
âI really missed you too,â you brush back some hair from his face. âYou couldâve gone home to sleep first, you know?â
Bucky opens his eyes and it takes great effort to do so, the whites of his eyes shot through with streaks of intense red.
âI wanted to see you,â he yawns. âBut youâve trapped me into laying on your sofa.â
You laugh, your fingers still knotted in his hair. âYou can take a nap Bucky, or you can sleep the night here. Iâm not really excited by the idea of you driving back tired.â
âI wonât doll,â he shuts his eyes again, the feel of your fingers on his scalp lulling him into a peacefulness heâs missed. âTell me what you got up to while I was gone. I know you werenât just counting down the days till I got back.â
You roll your eyes as you recount the last two weeks of your life, Buckyâs not even awake to hear what you did on the second day of him being gone.
You cover him up with your throw blanket and dim the lights of your living room. You make the playlist for him while he sleeps, putting all the songs youâve sent him on the memory stick so he can leave with it.
Bucky doesnât spend the night, but as heâs leaving he holds your cheek, âI didnât come with an ulterior motive, just to see you. If you want, we can go have dinner tomorrow. I have something I want to ask you, doll.â
âThatâs ominous,â youâre a little nervous by that phrase. No one likes being told that someone has âsomething to ask themâ in a day. Thereâs anxiety crawling up your chest before Bucky kisses your lips.
âItâs a good question baby, donât overthink it. Iâll pick you up at seven.â
You grab the memory stick off the table before you could forget, âHere, I put all the songs Iâve sent on here.â Bucky kisses you again.
âYouâre an angel,â you steal a kiss before he pulls away. âLock your doors.â
âSir yes sir.â
You hear him laugh all the way to his car.
Despite Buckyâs well meaning, âDonât overthink it.â Thatâs all you did when you woke up and started sifting through dresses to wear.
Youâre ready at six and that makes you even more anxious. Thereâs too much time to do nothing but sit and overthink it.
Youâre working yourself up to outright calling Bucky when thereâs a knock at your door.
A quick peek at the clock on your stove letâs you know youâve been overthinking it for forty five minutes.
When you open the door, Buckyâs standing in front of you in a pretty blue shirt that makes his eyes pop, and black dress pants.
Heâs not got flowers this time, but he is holding a box of what you think are chocolates.
âOh my god,â he breathes as he takes you in. Youâre in a pretty pale purple dress, white heels and your hair is down in loose curls. You hadnât gone for heavy makeup but just enough where thereâs purple glitter on your eyelids and your lips are a deep red.
âYou look handsome.â You say as you fight the blush creeping up your chest at the way Buckyâ stares at you.
âYou look,â he trails off like he really canât find the right words. âBreathtaking.â
You feel as though the blush explodes in your chest and heats your entire face.
Bucky hands you the box of chocolates, âTheyâre all dark chocolate.â You smile as you take it; thatâs another thing Buckyâs remembered you like.
âDo I get to know where weâre going?â
You ask as you slip the chocolates into your purse and shut your door.
Bucky smiles as he watches you lock your door before turning to him. Immediately he links his hand with yours.
âWeâre going for dinner somewhere nice,â the entire ride to the car Bucky has you talking. About the last book you read, work, if you think about him every night before bed (the last one was just to make you laugh, but the truth is you do.)
âWhat about you Bucky? Do you think about me before bed?â
You ask as he parks and he turns to you.
âOh yeah,â thatâs all he says before coming out of the car to open your door. âThink about you more than I think about anything else, doll.â
You manage to hold back your question just before dessert, âCan you please ask me? Iâm freaking out and I think my heart might explode from the anxiety.â
Thereâs a laugh that bubbles from you and Bucky tuts.
âHoney,â you press a hand to your chest. Your anxiety really is at an all time high. You have so many questions rattling around your head that Bucky could want to ask you and you may throw up the lovely pasta you just had if he doesnât ask you soon.
He leans across the table and holds onto your wrist, feeling the erratic beat of your pulse.
âIâve been torturing you, havenât I doll?â
You nod as you try to calm your racing heart.
âI didnât mean to,â Buckyâs thumb strokes short lines across your wrist. âI had it all set up to come with dessert but Iâll put you out of your misery.â
âThanks,â you mutter and he smiles.
âI know weâre only going steady,â that gets a smile out of you. He really is an old man, âbut I wanted to ask you if I could be yours? Saying boyfriend makes me feel older so I wonât say it.â
You laugh, letting your head fall on his hand where it holds yours.
âNot the other way around?â You ask and Bucky huffs.
âYouâre not property, honey.â
You look up with a smile and Buckyâs smile gets a little brighter. âYeah you can be mine.â
âCâmere,â he tilts your chin a little higher and kisses you; slow and just long enough for it not to be a full make out. âYou really missed out on the whole cheesecake with chocolate drizzle writing.â
He says as he pulls away and you laugh.
âOh, are they not bringing it anymore?â
Bucky shakes his head, mischief in his eyes. âAfter you just latched onto me in the middle of their establishment? I donât know, doll.â
âYouâre ridiculous.â They still bring the cheesecake and Bucky feeds you the first bite, and like the flirt and menace he is, he gets a little just to the corner of your mouth.
âLet me get it for you,â and steals another kiss, âcleaning it off.â
Bucky Barnes really knows how to court a woman.
I love this so much, It's so cute. đ€
Cupidâs Chokehold/Breakfast in America by Gym Class Heroes like Spencer just boasting his girlfriend to everyone
A/n: I adore this song, but it's stuck in my head now
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Y/n
Genre: complete fluff
WC: 2.5k
CW: nothing (??)
There weren't a lot of things Spencer Reid bragged about. He had a lot of accomplishments to brag about, 3 PhDs to start with. But he was extremely modest.
One of the things he was willing to brag about was his godson. Sweet Henry had taught him so much more than he expected a 4-year-old would be able to.
The thing he always gloated about was his girlfriend.
Beautiful Y/n L/n had been with Spencer for 7 months. And he was whipped.
The team sat on the jet on the way to Seattle to do what they did best.
Spencer Reid was uncharacteristically on the phone, wrapping up a phone call. "I'll come over when I'm back... You know that stuff has so much sugar in it?... Alright, that's a fair rebuttal... I know, I thought that was clever...Yes, I'll get Phish food flavored Ben and Jerry's... I promise...I love you... Well, I'd tell you how scientifically inaccurate that is, but I have a feeling you need to go... Okay, goodbye, I love you." He took the phone away from his ear and hung up.
When he looked up at the team, everyone was looking at him. Morgan couldn't stop his snickers, JJ was giving him some serious side-eye, and Kate had a frown on her face. Thankfully, to save him some embarrassment, Hotch and Rossi weren't listening.
Spencer could feel the blush rising on his cheeks as he sheepishly put his phone away.
"I really hope that wasn't a family member," Kate spoke with an amused tone.
Morgan laughed at her. "You don't even want to know, Callahan." He informed her.
"N-no, it wasn't," Spencer assured her, still smiling.
Spencer's shyness inspired her to press the topic. "Okay, I'll bite, seeing as I'm the only one who doesn't know. Who was it?" Kate asked.
If she thought Spencer's bursts of random knowledge was his key talking point, she was about to figure out she was wrong.
"Oh, Callahan, you really should have stopped," Morgan cautioned her, shaking his head at the error in the new agent's ways.
"Y/n is my girlfriend." Spencer began. Both JJ and Morgan were also listening, secretly happy for the baby of the team. "She's the love of my life." He admitted proudly.
"And when did you start telling her you loved her?" JJ prompted, wanting Spencer to tell Kate the hilarious story.
Spencer glared at her, blushing. "I think I should start at the beginning." He told them all. "So, one Saturday, I'm at my apartment. Reading, of course."
"Because it's the only thing he does." Morgan interrupted, ruffling Spencer's already messy hair. Spencer pulled away from him with an annoyed groan.
"But, there's a knock on the door, and I wasn't expecting anyone." Spencer continued the story. "So, when I opened the door, Y/n was standing there." His face lit up with a smile. "She was in this short white summer dress, with a blue floral print. And she was so pretty... she is so pretty." He corrected himself, dreamily thinking about Y/n with a giddy smile.
Kate was smiling at him tenderly. "Keep going with your story. It sounds sweet." She requested.
Spencer nodded, more than happy to tell anyone who asked how much he loved his girlfriend. "Right, so she's in this dress in front of my apartment, and, obviously, we both have no idea who the other is." He explained, moving his hands to make the story more interesting. "Oh, and she has flowers." He still had the image of Y/n's pretty dress in his brain and her pretty face. Which was making it difficult for him to remember the full story. "It was a big bouquet of sunflowers. And I was really nervous about how pretty she was, so I just started on a whole spiel about sunflowers. Like how the scientific name for them is Helianthus, which comes from the Greek words helios, which means sun, and, anthus which means flower." Spencer start, gesturing with his hands.
"How long did you talk for?" Kate asked. For only just joining the team, she was very observant of Spencer's inclination for long rambling.
Morgan chuckled again, shaking his head at the answer he already knew. "4 minutes," Spencer admitted shyly, cheeks painted red. "I asked her if she knew that, in Chinese culture, sunflowers are given at graduations and the start of new businesses because they symbolize good luck." Spencer continued to ramble. "And I think she was a little put off because she just shook her head while frowning." He observed.
"I wonder why," JJ uttered with a side-eyed glance at Spencer. Still, she was smiling at her best friend's happiness.
Spencer just shrugged. "And I told her that sunflowers were the national flower of Ukraine and Russia. And asked her if she knew that they were worshipped by the Incas empire because of their resemblance to the sun. But she still shook her head. Then I told her all about the Fibonacci sequence and how all sunflower seeds follow the pattern." He babbled out facts. Still, it was the short version of what Y/n had heard when they first met.
"Is that how you always talk to girls you like?" Kate asked with an amused smile.
Morgan pipped up again. "Yes, I've tried to help him out before, but it's never worked."
"I did get a girlfriend all on my own." Spencer shot back. Morgan held his hands up in defense while JJ giggled. "When she did finally speak-"
"When you finally gave her the chance to speak." Morgan corrected.
Spencer shot him a glare before continuing. "She told me that clearly, she wasn't at the right apartment. But she wanted to know how I knew so much about sunflowers. And I was surprised that she didn't just think I was weird. She's just so kind." He fondly spoke of his girlfriend. "And I replied by nervously admitting I liked facts. She told me she was impressed, which I didn't believe. Because she's so gorgeous that I figured she'd been hit on a thousand times by guys much more attractive than me." Spencer's self-doubting tendencies came in. "But, somehow, I managed to thank her and ask her where she was meant to go." He continued. "She said it was my next-door neighbor and that the flowers were to cheer up her friend, who had gotten broken up with." Although he felt wrong for it, Spencer smiled at how Y/n's friend's unlucky day was his luckiest day. "So I told her where the apartment was, and then that sunflowers have a vase life of about 7 days. So, she takes a flower out of the bunch and gives it to me. And all she said was that she'd see me next week." Spencer finished the story of one of the best days of his life.
Kate found it adorable, as did JJ and maybe even Morgan, who was just hesitant to admit it. "That's so sweet." Kate cooed. Spencer nodded, still blushing a little. "Do you have a picture?" She asked.
Spencer eagerly pulled out his iPhone, which he only had because Y/n influenced him. She even had to teach him how to use it. He produced a full album of photos which he handed over to Kate to swipe through.
Pictures with Y/n made up 70% of his limited camera roll. Mostly it was photos she insisted on taking of them together. Spencer always argued, but they both knew he enjoyed it.
When he was away of cases, feeling low, he'd just look at a picture of her smiling face from a date they went on. Or Y/n reading in his apartment. He'd never enjoyed photography until he had a muse.
Kate flipped through the photos with a smile.
"The whole fact we even met was extremely improbable," Spencer told them, not diving into the actual number. "And I never believed in fate, but since I've met Y/n, I'm not so sure." He concluded.
Kate handed him his phone back. "You're right. She's pretty." Spencer took his phone, locking it before showing Kate the lock screen wallpaper. It was a picture of him and Y/n that Garcia had managed to capture. Y/n's hands were cupping his cheeks as she looked back into the camera with a huge grin, matching Spencer's. Every time a message came in with bad news, her smile made him feel better.
"I do want to hear the rest of this story, though." Kate reminded him, snapping him out of his daydream.
Spencer put his phone away. "Right, so she came back to my place the next week, and thankfully I was there. And she told me that her friend wasn't even home, but she'd come to see me. Of course, I was a little confused, not expecting her to even come back. But, I invited her into my very messy apartment, which still didn't deter her. She told me all about how her friend had noticed me coming and going at random times of the day and night and wanted to know what was up with that." Spencer recalled clearly. "But she thought I was some type of cool spy, so I just agreed. And I went to make coffee, but Garcia called, and Y/n picked up the phone." Spencer retold the story of how he heard Penelope's loudest squeals.
"So, what happened next?" Kate asked, figuratively on the edge of her seat.
"Right, so Y/n talks on the phone to Garcia until I come in, and she hands it over. And Garcia screamed in my ear for a minute about the 'mystery girl in my apartment.'" Spencer directly quoted with air quotes. "But then she said we had a case. So I had to very apologetically kick Y/n out of my apartment and go. She just kept telling me that it was totally alright." He continued. Maybe fate, if it was real, wasn't always on his side. "But, she gave me her number and said that when I got back, I owed her a cup of coffee," Spencer concluded the story of their second meeting.
He was grateful for Y/n for a lot of things. But, when he thought back to the start of their relationship, it was because of her forwardness.
"And I came back to DC at 5 in the morning, text her, and she was awake, so I agreed to meet her at her favorite cafe, and we got coffee," Spencer recalled their first date. "I brought her sunflowers because, to me, they have a deeper meaning than any ancient civilizations." He added.
To him, sunflowers would always be associated with the love of his life, standing on his doorstep.
"Aww, that's cute," Kate commented. She hadn't profiled Spencer as being a romantic until now. "What was she doing up at 5 am, though?" She questioned.
"Oh, she's a corporate lawyer. She's remarkably bright. She did a joint degree at Yale and Oxford so she can practice law in both countries." Spencer proudly replied. "But she was up because she was working on a merger for a company in London." He answered Kate's original question. "She's so smart that she graduated at the top of her classes in both countries." He continued to brag.
"She sounds really great, Reid," Kate replied. She hadn't been with the team for long, but she'd read all their files. And Spencer deserved every bit of love he was getting.
"Tell her the 'I love you' story." JJ requested, clearly paying more attention than she'd care to admit to the conversation.
Spencer nodded. "So, we'd been dating for 2 months, 25 days, 4 hours, and 21 minutes." He started, making everyone else laugh. "I wanted her to meet the team, and Rossi was having a dinner party, so I invited her. On the day of the party, I go to her apartment to pick her up in a suit." He set the scene for Kate. He had been so nervous for her to meet the team the whole day. "And she's wearing a gorgeous red satin dress. She always looks beautiful, but she looked extra beautiful that day. I was so flustered over how to act because I've never introduced anyone to the team."
When Spencer even announced he was planning on bringing a guest, everyone was shocked. Not one of them had heard about Y/n, but as soon as he spoke about her, they knew it was serious.
"So I go into her apartment, she kisses me, and she asks how I think she looks while she's collecting her things." Spencer began. "And because my brain was so overloaded with worries, I just told her I love her."
Only he would ever be able to see the shocked look on Y/n's face that slowly turned to joy. Only he would remember how it felt when she kissed him again, practically jumping into his arms. Only he would remember how relieved he felt when she said it back.
"She wasn't deterred by that?" Kate asked with a laugh.
Sure, it might have been early, and Spencer was never good with his feelings, but he was sure he loved Y/n.
He shook his head. "She said it back. And, of course, I told her how stunning she looked." He continued the story.
"She sounds great, Reid. When can I meet her?" Kate asked, now intrigued to meet the girl who turned Spencer to mush.
"Uh, well, when we get back to DC, I'm planning on asking her to move in with me." He squeaked out, voice higher.
JJ turned to look at him with wide eyes. "Spence-" She started.
Spencer interrupted, preempting her question. "I know we haven't been dating for long, but I see her nearly every day when I'm in DC. And whenever I'm away, we talk on the phone." He defended his choice.
JJ shook her head at him. "I was going to say congratulations." She corrected him.
"Oh, thank you," Spencer replied. He had been hoping for a warm response, but he wasn't sure he was going to get one.
Since he'd started dating her, he wanted nothing more than to come home from a hard case and have Y/n in his arms. Something about it assured him that everything would be alright.
He turned back to Kate. "So, I guess we'll have a housewarming." He replied, unable to wipe the smile off his face.
He didn't give any thought to what would happen if she said no. Y/n had taught him to be confident.
"Well, I'm very excited," Kate assured him. "Although, you probably shouldn't tell her that her ice cream has 'so much sugar in it.'" She warned him, using air quotes.
Spencer gave her a worried look before smiling.
Morgan stuck out a hand to ruffle his hair again. "You know you haven't stopped smiling since she called?" He observed with a smirk.
A comment like that would have made Spencer blush usually, but he was far too giddy with the thought of Y/n living with him to let it both her.
He just shrugged. "I'm completely in love, and can you blame me?"
Not one of them could fault that statement.
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I love this sooo much
in which spencer reid picks up uni!reader from a party. you're drunk, and he's in love with you
fluff:) warnings/tags: established relationship, fem!reader, university!reader x professor!spencer but you're not his student, unspecified age gap, um statistic about deaths from drunk driving, spencer is a nerd a/n: this is accidentally so romantic I'm gonna puke
The night is chillyâa still, dry type of cold that comes before snowfall. Itâs quiet, like the world is preparing for that heavy blanket of white. Even the pounding bass from the frat house doesnât make it very far before falling flat at the end of the yard. By the time Spencer gets you to his car down the block, itâs a thready pulse.Â
âThanks for walking me,â you say, giving him a saccharine smile as he opens the passenger door for you. His scoff is a thick white cloud, crystallizing against cold, shining skin, slightly pinkened from the temperature. Spencer is glowing like a star tonight. You donât know if itâs the blurriness from the alcohol in your system smudging the edges of him, or if itâs just that incandescent halo that always seems to follow him around.
âYou know I wasnât going to let you walk down frat row by yourself at one in the morning.â
You pout and look up at him, leaning close.Â
âSo you donât want me to say thank you?âÂ
Spencerâs mouth is curved in absent-minded affection as he takes advantage of the opportunity to study you up close with darting eyes, entertaining your girlish flirtation, and you in turn get to admire the starlit flush of his cheeks, the way his hair falls around his face and thick eyelashes frame irises that could melt ice. Youâre not entirely conscious of the huge grin that cracks open your face, but you suspect its presence when his own lips part, still smiling, like heâs maybe going to say something sweet. Or teasing.Â
âYouâre drunk.â
At this absolute and unarguable truth, you frown. Heâs grinning now as he adjusts the thick scarf around your neck, shielding your ears and neck further from the chill that the open car door canât block.Â
âNo Iâm not.â
âCâmere,â he murmurs, and before you can process it heâs leaning down, so of course your eyes are going to flutter shut and of course youâre going to kiss him back. The gentle ferocity of it only has you stumbling in place a little bit, and he steadies you with hands around your waist. Itâs over entirely too soon. You blink up at him, your shock and fluster betrayed by the visible huff of air dispelled as soon as he pulls away. Heâs smiling even wider now. Vindicated. Eyes sparkling. âGin? Wow. You are drunk.â
It takes you a moment longer than it usually would to decipher how he figured this out.Â
âSo you just kissed me to prove your theory right?â
The sparkling satisfaction from his indictment softens around his eyes.Â
âI knew you were drunk when you almost fell down the stairs a minute ago. The kiss was purely selfish.â
âItâs icy,â you defend, and your heart flutters as he comes in for another kiss. Itâs soft and still shockingly deep for being on the street, where anyone could seeâalthough everyone smart is inside, and anyone else is too drunk to care that his mouth is open against yours and the heat of it is translating deep in your stomach. Youâre dizzy by the time he laughs quietly against you.Â
âWhat college student is pounding gin and tonics at a frat party?â
The thick wool of his coat bunches under your searching fingers.Â
âMe,â you whisper. âI was classing up the joint.â
The final kiss he presses to your lips is sweeter and half smile. âDrunk.â
The murmured accusation shouldnât make you feel so giddy. Maybe itâs all the gin.Â
âNot.â
Another little chuckle warms the tip of your nose and your lips as he breathes it out.
âSo youâre good to drive us home?â
You itch to kiss him again, but instead, you respond, âOne person dies every thirty nine minutes in America from drunk driving.â
âGood job. You passed.â
The praise is accompanied by a thumb rubbing at your hip through denim. He probably thought you werenât listening when heâd spouted that particular statistic a few hours ago.Â
âDo I get a gold star?â
He kisses your head.Â
âWeâll see. Get in.â
On the way home, that last shot hits you. You slump down in your seat and hide your face in your hands.Â
âOh, Spencer. Iâm⊠Iâm drunk.â
You feel him glancing at you before he sets a concerned hand on your thigh.Â
âYou okay?â
Morosely you nod.Â
âYeah. I took a shot with this⊠Delta Phi Epsilon guy, right before you got there. I wasnât gonna, but he was like, no, you have to! And now I realize that was dumb.â
Spencerâs hand finds the back of your head, stroking your hair.Â
âDo you know what Iâm going to say about frat boys pressuring you to drink?â
âIt wasnât like that. He was really nice.â
âIâm sure he was,â Spencer says dryly. âLots of men become really nice when they think they might have something to gain.â
âI thought he was gay!â You laugh, uncovering your face. âSorry, dad. I wonât drink alcohol or talk to boys anymore.â
Spencer makes a face and you know youâve successfully traded pounds of flesh.Â
âIf you call me dad again Iâm making you take an abnormal psych class.â
You give him a lazy smile which he only takes his eyes off the road for a few seconds to admire.Â
âIâd take abnormal psych if you were my professor.â
That perpetual upturn at the corners of his perfect mouth flickers wider.Â
âWow. Does gin make you sexually frustrated?â
âIt makes me lazy. The professor-student thing is really low hanging fruit.â
âYeah, it is. You know Iâll expect better material from you once youâve sobered up.â
You sigh and let your head loll to the front again, studying the tunneling road through the windshield. A few flakes slash the headlights. Your mind wanders. You donât bother reeling it in.Â
âIâm really glad Iâm not your student. Iâd have the worst crush on you.â
Spencer casts you another side-long glance before adjusting the rear-view mirror.Â
âYou donât have a crush on me now?â
âOf course I do. But you like me back. If I was your student youâd never look at me like that. I would just have to pine after you and fall in deep unrequited love like all your other female students.â
He hums skeptically.Â
âI donât know what Iâd do. I canât imagine not being in love with you.â
âThere are universes where youâre not. There are infinite realities where I am your student and you donât like me back and youâre dating other girls who arenât me and youâre saying this exact stuff to them.â
âTrue. There are also infinite realities where I find you and I fall in love with you.â Spencer reaches over again, taking your hand and settling them, joined, in your lap. âFor each trillionth of a billionth of a second of the life Iâve lived thus far, there are infinite universes which exist solely so I can fall in love with you in a new way. Over and over again. Thereâs not a choice I could make in any timeline, or in any universe, that doesnât lead an infinite number of meâs to an infinite number of youâs.âÂ
The engine hums. The tires roll.Â
Other than thatâitâs dead silent.Â
Because how could he ever expect anyone to respond to that?
You slink low in your seat and bring his hand to cradle your face, warm against your cheek.Â
âI hate you,â you mumble. Spencer strokes your jaw absentmindedly, not at all concerned by your dramatics.Â
âYou hate me? I just said I love you.â
âNo, you did not. You said thâI donât even wanna call it romantic. Romantic doesnâtâI donât even know what that was. You canât just say things like that, Spencer! You canât just casually say stuff like that to me, and especially not when Iâm drunk, because Iâm gonna start crying!âÂ
The last word pitches up and perfectly illustrates your point as tears begin to roll down your cheeksâstill nipped by the cold.Â
Spencer quickly pulls the car off to the side of the abandoned road.Â
Heâs all affection as he twists to face you and take your face in his hands properly, thumbing away tears.Â
âWhat? Whatâs wrong?âÂ
âYou j-just love me so much,â you sob.
âYes,â Spencer laughs like itâs the most obvious thing in the world. âI do. I love you so much. I didnât mean to make you cry, sweetheart.â
âYouâyou donât even realize, that you said the nicest thing anyoneâs ever said to anyone, and you love me more than anyoneâs ever loved anyone, andâandââ
You cut yourself off with another hot wave of tears and a shuddering cry.Â
âOh, my girl,â Spencer coos through an adoring little laugh as he pushes hair out of your face. âYou are so drunk, baby. Come here.â
You let him undo your buckle and pull you across the console-less seat (thank you, vintage car) into his arms. For a minute or two you can hardly speak, crying into the warmth of his jacket as he holds you.Â
Eventually, you manage to raise your head and pull back enough to look at him. Immediately heâs assessing you with those soft eyes, watching how you wipe away whatever tears didnât soak into his clothing. Under his watchful gaze, you exhale a sniffing laugh.Â
âIâm sorry.â
âDonât apologize.â
Itâs so immediate youâre knocked off balance again. âWellâyou were just being nice, and Iââ
âI do love you more than anyone has ever loved anyone.â
Usually, you dislike being interrupted.Â
In this instance, youâll let it slide.Â
Itâs simply too earnest, too honest as his eyes dart between yours like he couldnât contain it. Like you said it and the thought struck him right in the faceâan obvious truth he hadnât considered before.Â
âIn infinite universes?â You sniffle.Â
âIn infinite universes,â he agrees.Â
Both of you notice the snow has started to come down outside. Over the course of a few silent minutes, it gets heavier and heavierâa soft hail, sheets of whispering white.Â
Youâve never been afraid to break the silence with him.Â
But maybe if you werenât drunk you could keep your questions to yourself.Â
âHow many snowflakes are we looking at?â
Spencer hesitates, drawn from some kind of hypnosis.Â
âHard to be sure. Heavy snowfall like this could easily put us at six inches within the hour. In that case weâve watched around point two inches fall. Visibility is probably reduced to about a quarter mile⊠point two inches across a square quarter mile is a hundred and seventeen thousand five hundred square feet of snow, average density of flakes at this temperature being about three kilograms per cubic foot of snow, and a snowflake weighs maybe⊠point zero zero zero zero zero two kilograms, so, roughlyâŠÂ very roughly⊠weâre looking at one hundred and forty two million snowflakes. Thatâs my best guess.â
You look up at him from where youâd been resting your head on his shoulder.Â
âYouâre the coolest person ever.â
He blushes.Â
Tries to reply.Â
Looks back out the window and huffs a nervous laugh, like youâve flustered him.Â
âLots of people could do that. The math isnât too complicated. Itâs also probably wrong.â
A slow smile blossoms on your face.Â
âYouâre never wrong. So⊠what percentage of infinity is a hundred and forty two million?â
âUh⊠undefined,â he laughs, looking back down at you. âBut⊠in tangible terms, which is inherently contradictory because infinity is completely intangible, and actually pretty meaningless to mathematiciansâmore of a philosophical concept than a numerical one⊠it is a very small fraction. Itâs nothing.â
âI donât want philosophical,â you murmur, reaching up to graze your knuckles along his cheekbone. âI want hard numbers.â
He catches your hand and holds the tips of your fingers to his lips as he thinks, watching hundreds of millions of snowflakes falling from the wide black heavens through narrowed eyes.Â
âA googol is written as a one followed by a hundred zeros, and a googolplex is a one followed by a googol of zeros. Thatâs the largest named number we have. It surpasses the estimated number of atoms in the universe. Itâs too large to conceptualize. Mathematicians donât really have any practical use for numbers above one trillion, but the largest number youâll find in a dictionary and which might be formally accredited is a centillion, which is a one followed by three hundred and three zeros. Itâs bigger than a googol but hardly a fraction of a googolplex. Butâokay, weâre setting aside the conceptual numbers. What was your question?â
Your head spins as you laugh.Â
Too much gin. Too many IQ points.Â
âInfinity divided by, uh⊠the number of snowflakes I can see right now.â
The engine is still onâheat blows steadily, warming your arm through a coat and sweater, and whatever it canât reach is warmed by Spencer.Â
âRight. Okay. Wellâto put it into perspective, with snowflakes, you have around one septillion that fall each year. Thatâs twenty four zeros, so⊠a lot. Are you with me?â
âNo.â
âGreat. So, a hundred and forty two million is basically infinity.â
This earns a clumsy, drunken laugh from you, and he smiles like heâd been hoping for that.Â
Itâs so warm in the cab of his car. Itâs so warm under his gaze.Â
Outside, the snow continues to fall.Â
For each flake, there is a world where you and Spencer fall in love. And in the grand scheme of things, youâre not looking at very many.Â
In infinite universes, youâll find each other. For eternity.Â
Youâd be happy with just this one.Â
I love this so much
Summary : Bucky needs to go on a mission, so he asks the rest of the team to take care of his girl.
Pairing : Bucky Barnes x reader (she/her) / Platonic!Thunderbolts x reader
Warnings/tags : Thunderbolts* spoilers!!!!!!! Established Relationship. TOWER FIC!!! Fluff, angst. Cursing. trauma. Death, nightmares, sleepwalking, hurt/comfort. Sam and Bucky arenât mad at each other in this one (Please let me know if I miss anything!!!)
Word count : 4.1kÂ
Note : This story is based on my own experiences with sleepwalking. If youâd like to be on the taglist, message me! It gets lost in the comments sometimes. Enjoy!
The New Avengers weren't as polished as their predecessors. You werenât even close to the universal beacon of hope they used to be â you flickered and survived.
This team was a patchwork of second chances and shattered pasts, proof that good people came with scars â that good people might have done things that kept you all up at night. It was a miracle anyone got any sleep at all.Â
Least of all you.Â
Ever since your first kill, you barely got a full nightâs rest.
By the time you joined the team, it had already been years of fragmented restâ twenty-minute naps stolen on ships here, an hour of sleep on dirty cots there. And when sleep did finally drag you under, it was rarely ever peaceful.
Sometimes, the worst part wasnât even the nightmares. Sometimes it was waking up in the living room, not even in control, your feet bare and your skin clammy from a sleepwalk you didnât remember beginning.
Youâd warned Bucky when you started dating him.Â
One night, you sat him down while your fingers nervously pulled at the threads on your sleeve and handed him a list. Not a literal one, but it felt like thatââIf I start talking in my sleep, donât wake me up too fast. If Iâm not in bed, check the bathtub or the closet. Donât try to hold me down if I fight in my sleep. Only wake me if it becomes dangerous. But most of the time, it passes. I promise.â And worst of all, âDonât be scared of me.â
Youâd braced yourself for rejection then, for an excuse or another that said âyouâre too much.â But Bucky had only taken your hand in his, metal fingers brushing gently against your palm like he understood in a way that no one else ever had.
One night, after youâd had a particularly brutal episodeâscreaming in your sleep, flinching from his touch even though heâd tried to soothe youâhe didnât say a word.Â
He just pulled you close once youâd woken, let you curl into his chest with your face pressed against his skin.
âIâm not afraid of you,â he whispered into your hair.
That night, you cried into him until your breathing slowed, and for the first time in a long, long while, you stayed asleep.
Over time, you found a kind of peace with him that youâd never had before. It didnât fix everythingâ Bucky would be the first to admitâ but it eased your nights. You rested better because he made you feel safe.Â
On bad days, heâd lie beside you, his arm around your waist, his thumb brushing circles into your side.
And sometimes, when sleep came like a gentle tide instead of a crashing wave, youâd open your eyes in the morning light and find him already awake, watching you protectively.Â
âYou slept,â heâd say with a proud smile, as if it were the most precious thing in the world.
For a while, things almost felt normal again. Maybe not perfect, but betterâ until you and Bucky got dragged to be part of the New Avengers. And just like that, for convenience's sake, you both moved in the Watchtower.
It wasnât awful. There was always someone around, always laughter coming from the common room. But adjusting was hard.Â
The bedroom felt too large, the ceilings too high, the Watchtower too big. It was⊠unfamiliar. Uneasy. Still, with Bucky lying beside you, it was manageable.
But some nights⊠some nights were worse than others. Youâd still find yourself drifting barefoot through the corridors, your eyes glassy, your fingers twitching restlessly. Youâd pull open drawers, rearrange cabinets, and unconsciously line pens up in perfect gradients. Once, Bucky found you curled in the closet with a granola bar clutched to your chest. You didnât remember getting there. You only remembered waking up in his arms, sobbing so hard even though you couldnât explain why you were upset.
That night, when Yelena peeked out of her room to see what all the commotion was about, Bucky smiled and said, âSheâll be okay, Lena. She just needs some peace and quiet, right, baby?â
You gave a small, hopeful smile. âY-yeah.â
Because with him there⊠it really was easier to breathe.
â
The next morning, you asked Bucky to tell the rest of the team of your condition, and he waited until you were in the shower to gather the team in the kitchen. Ava leaned against the counter with her arms crossed, John was already halfway through his second cup of coffee, Bob dropped his book, Alexei was drinking a glass of milk, and Yelena sat on the counter with a knowing look in her eyes.
Bucky didnât pace or shift or stall. He just said it.
âShe sleepwalks, sometimes. Worse when Iâm gone. Itâs not⊠always random. Itâs tied to stress. Or nightmares.â His voice was gentle. âYou might hear her moving around at night, maybe see her organizing weird stuff or⊠I donât know, in a closet. Donât freak out. Donât wake her up unless she's in danger, Donât make it a thing.â
The silence that followed wasnât awkward. It was understanding.
Yelena gave a small nod and muttered, âIâve done weirder.â John just said, âGot it, man,â and reached for another coffee pod.
Bucky let out a breath he hadnât realized heâd been holding. He didnât want pity for you. He didnât want tiptoes or whispers. He just wanted you to have a little space to exist without explaining yourself.
And when you wandered into the room an hour later, eyes still a little hazy, no one stared. No one asked questions.
They just said âHey,â like it was any other morning.
And somehow, that made all the difference.
â
Still, no one got involved... yet.
Bucky was the only one who knew how to reach you. The only person who could read your silences like sentences, who knew exactly when to speak, and when to hold you so tightly the pieces couldnât fall apart again.
So when Sam reached out to Bucky for help with an intel recovery mission in Madripoor, your heart dropped. You didnât tell him not to go, but Bucky saw the way your hands twisted in the hem of your sweater, the way your mouth stayed open like you were trying to find a reason to make him stay.
He found you in the kitchen the night before he left, staring blankly into a cup of tea you hadnât touched.
âSweetheart,â he said, stepping behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist. âLook at me.â
Your eyes slowly found his, and he knew.Â
âI hate this,â you whispered, the words brittle.
âI know,â he said, cupping your face in his hands. âIâll be gone for two days. Three, tops. I swear.â
You leaned into him, âI sleep better when youâre here.â
âI know, honey,â He pressed a kiss to your forehead, then your cheek, then the corner of your mouth. âI hate leaving you. But he needs me just for this one thing. And I promise I wouldnât go unless I knew youâd be taken care of.â
You looked up at him, âI donât want to be a burden to the team.â
âYou are never a burden,â he said firmly, his voice a low rasp. âNever. And while Iâm gone, theyâll keep you safe because they want to, not because they have to.â
Before he left, he gathered the others in the main room.
âKeep an eye on her,â Bucky said quietly. âSheâs strong â donât let her tell you otherwise â but she doesnât always ask for help.â
They all nodded, some more solemn than others.
âIf she does, donât wake her unless you have to. It can be⊠disorienting. But if sheâs not safe â if sheâs near stairs or rooftops or anything like that â then wake her up gently. No yelling. No shaking her. Itâll only make it worse.â
Yelena raised an eyebrow. âWhat if we throw a blanket on her and pretend sheâs a ghost?â
Bucky gave her a pointed look.
She raised her hand in defeat. âFine. No blankets. Understood.â
âThank you,â Bucky said, quieter now, looking over each of them. âJust⊠She means everything to me.â
They nodded again. Even John offered a pat in the back, and Ava gave a flickering smile.
That night, he kissed you once more at the door. âIâll be back before you know it.â
But time always moved slower without him. And sleep â if it came at all â would bring with it the ghosts you couldnât outrun.
â
The first night without Bucky was the worst.
You didnât sleep. Not even for a minute. You paced the compound like a spectre, wearing one of his oversized Henleys and a pair of mismatched socks. The halls were quiet but your mind was unbearably loud.
What if something happened to him? What if this was the one time he didnât come back?
You were awake in the kitchen at 2 a.m., your fingers trailing along the countertops. You made tea and forgot it on the counter. You folded a blanket you didnât remember picking up. You stood in front of the window for forty-five minutes, watching shadows move across the landing pad like you were trying to count sheep.
Yelena followed you silently, not intruding. She was nearby, perched on the kitchen island, tossing a grape between her fingers.
She didnât ask you to sit down. She didnât ask what you were thinking. She just waited.
âCanât sleep?â she finally said casually.
You shook your head. âIf I try, Iâll just end up with a bad dream.â
âThen donât try. Come,â she said, patting the spot beside her. âSit. Eat terrible snacks with me. I stole jerky from John .â
You offered a smile, and for a moment, it felt almost normal â like you were just friends pulling a late night, instead of trauma survivors outrunning your past.Â
â
The second night was harder in a different way.
Your body gave in, just barely, around 3 a.m.Â
You collapsed on the couch in the common room and curled into yourself. The others left you be â glad to see you resting at all.
But two hours later, you screamed in your sleep.
Bob got there first.
He found you thrashing in, tangled in the blanket like it was strangling you. Tears streamed down your face, and your hands clawed at the air as you whimpered words no one could quite make out.
âNoâpleaseâdonât take himâdonâtâ!â
Bob dropped to his knees beside you. He didnât try to wake you â remembered Buckyâs warning â but he said your name softly, voice like pattering rain on glass.
âItâs okay. Youâre safe,â he whispered, over and over. âYouâre not alone.â
Eventually, your screams died into sobs. Still asleep, you curled toward him, burying your face in his shoulders. Bob let you cry against him.
He didnât know if youâd remember any of it.Â
John had stood nearby the whole time, sleepy when he was woken up by the noise. When Bob looked up at him with tired eyes, he invited John to sit next to you both.Â
He did, because perhaps he thought he could help keep you both safe.
â
The third night was deceptively calm.
You seemed better. Youâd eaten half a piece of toast that morning. Youâd even made a small joke at Alexeiâs expense, and everyone had taken that as a good sign.
Still, the team took care of you closely.
That night, after the motion sensors in the living room went off because you started sleepwalking, Alexei, Ava, and John took the unofficial nightwatch dutyâ all of them too alert to sleep anyway. You shuffled into the hallway around 1 a.m., eyes half-lidded. You looked straight through Alexei, who had been sitting on the floor playing chess against himself.Â
He didnât say a word, just stood up and followed you at a distance.
You wandered into the kitchen and opened the same drawer four times in a row. Flipped the light switch on and off, on and off. Then you just⊠stood there, staring at the fridge.
John found you a little while later, drifting into the laundry room. He didnât panic.Â
âHey,â he said, blocking the doorway, âthis isnât your bedroom.â
You blinked slowly with foggy eyes, but didnât respond.
âCome on, letâs go back,â he said, not touching you, just using the calm voice heâd been practicing since Bucky left.Â
âCouch sounds better than tile, right?â
You followed him without protest, your feet shuffling over the floor. He guided you gently to the common room and helped you sit on the couch, draping a blanket over your shoulders.
Ava came to relieve him an hour later.
No one told the others to watch you. No one needed to. It had simply become understood â an agreement among people whoâd known isolation too well to let anyone else suffer it.
You were never left alone for long.
â
The fourth night, things only got worse.
Bucky's message came in just past midday â the mission was running longer than planned. What was supposed to be three days had stretched to four, maybe more. They were holed up in a safe house, radio silent except for brief check-ins. Your already-bad anxiety only spiked.
So, of course, it manifested in your sleeping habits.
You were beyond exhausted, though. Somewhere between 2 and 4 a.m., your body gave out before your mind could. And that's when the sleepwalking started again.Â
Yelena noticed first when the motion sensor on the jet landing pad pinged, lighting up the communicator on her bedside table. Her eyes snapped open in panic.Â
One glance at the screen by her bed andâ
Oh.
Oh no.
âBlyat,â she cursed, already half out of bed.
The security feed showed you barefoot and draped in one of Buckyâs shirts that hung past your thighs, drifting forward in a dreamy gait.
You were headed straight for the edge of the roof.
âAva!â Yelena barked into the intercom by her door. âSheâs upâsheâs on the roof!â
Ava didnât even answer. She was already phasing halfway through her bedroom door before the words had finished transmitting.Â
Her molecules blurred as she sprinted through walls and the glass doors leading to the edge.Â
She found you on the rooftop, barely more than a silhouette, the wind tugging at your hair and the cold bit at your bare feet.
You were standing at the edge. Right at the ledge.
The skyline sparkled as your fingers trembled to reach for something invisible in the air in front of you.
âHeâs gone,â you mumbled into the wind. âI have to find himâŠâ
Ava didnât shout your name. She didnât touch you too fast. She knew better.
She forced herself to become solid again and circled herself around your torso from behind.
âItâs okay,â she whispered. âYouâre safe. Iâve got you.â
You didnât react â not really. Your muscles twitched, but you didnât pull away.
John was next, thundering up the stairs with bare feet and wide eyes, stopping short the moment he saw you on the ledge.Â
His instincts wanted him to act, to tackle you into safety, but he didnât. Not when he saw how still you were. Not when he saw how gently Ava held you. He lifted both hands, palms out, staying back, like he might catch you if anything went wrong.
âEasyâŠâ he muttered under his breath, more to himself than anyone else.Â
Alexei arrived just after. One look at the scene stopped him in his tracks. âBozhe moiâŠâ he whispered. He took a cautious step forward and dropped to his knees, trying to be less threatening.
âDruga,â he said gently, kneeling just to your side. âYouâre dreaming, okay? Just a dream. Weâre here. No need to find anyone â youâre already home.â
Bob drifted up moments later. He didnât say a word. He just hovered nearby.
And then Yelena burst through the door, breath hitching as her eyes scanned the perimeter.
âIs sheâ?â
âSheâs okay,â Bob answered quietly, âWeâve got her.â
Yelena let out a shaky breath and moved closer.
You whimpered softly, your whole body trembling in Avaâs arms. Your hands curled into fists, then relaxed again. Tears slid down your cheeks even as your eyes stayed closed. Even asleep, you were breaking.
You were inching closer to the ledge, your toes just brushing the edge of now.
âI have to find him,â you mumbled again, voice cracking. âHeâs not safe. I have to find him.â
Alexei looked at Ava. At Yelena.
âSheâs not coming out of it,â Yelena whispered. âSheâs too far under.â
âDo it,â John said, tense. âNow. Before sheââ
Alexei nodded once, then reached forward, placing one palm on your shoulders. It was him who finally made the call. âTime to wake up now. Youâre safe. Youâre dreaming.â
Your body stiffened immediately. The moment your nervous system registered something was wrong, your fight-or-flight instincts kicked in.
And they kicked hard.
Coming back into consciousness in panic, you boltedâ or tried to.
Ava held you still, even as your eyes snapped open, and you screamed.
âNo! No, no, no! Let go of me! Let goââ
âItâs okay, itâs okayââ Ava said, tightening her grip, keeping you away from the ledge.
You thrashed. Alexei backed off, hands up, trying not to crowd you.
Yelena stepped forward and crouched, her voice firmer than the others. âLook at me. Youâre here. Youâre home. We have you.â
But your body didnât believe her. Your eyes were darting wildly, trying to make sense of noise and faces, adrenaline pumping so hard it made your vision blur.
John, who managed to grab a blanket, wrapped it over your shoulders while muttering, âItâs okay, youâre okay,â on repeat like a prayer, even though your eyes werenât processing him yet.
Bob moved in slowly, hoping just being there would help.
Eventuallyâeventuallyâyour eyes found something familiar.
The logo on the roof.Â
The view on the edge.Â
The ledge.
Your legs buckled the moment your body remembered gravity.
Ava and Alexei caught you instantly â Avaâs arms looping under your shoulders, Alexei scooping beneath your knees, reminding yourself he was a man who once threw tanks for fun.
âIâI didnât mean toââ your voice broke, and you curled in on yourself, clutching the sides of Buckyâs shirt like it could protect you from your own confusion. âI donât remember what I was dreaming. I didnât mean to come up here. I didnât meanââ
âWe know,â Yelena said firmly. âItâs okay.â
âNo oneâs mad,â John reassured, âYou didnât do anything wrong.â
You swallowed, and with a shaky breath, nodded once.
You werenât fully okay â not even close â but you were with them.
âLetâs get you out of the cold, druga,â Alexei said.Â
You didnât fight the suggestion.
The rooftop door swung behind you as Bob pushed it open.Â
All of you managed to walk back in.Â
No one said the obvious â how close youâd come to falling.
No one had to.
You reached the common room without question, because none of them wanted to put you back in your room alone. You wouldnât sleep, and none of them would, either.
They laid you gently down on the oversized couch in the center of the room. You blinked up at the ceiling, eyes still dazed, until Bob appeared beside you with a warm cup of tea. He placed it in your hands.
You didnât drink it. You just held it, palms wrapped tight around the mug, as if the warmth alone was enough to anchor you.
âIâm sorry,â you said, finally
âYou donât have to be,â Ava replied immediately, sitting beside you on the couches.
John sat on the floor in front of you, back against the coffee table, hands dangling over his knees. âWeâve all had bad nights. This just happened to be one of yours.â
Alexei brought in two more pillows and tossed one over your legs. He tucked the second by Yelena, who tried to wave him off before giving up with a sigh and letting him fuss.
Bob curled into an armchair nearby. âWeâll keep watch,â he said. âWe always do.â
And then, something remarkable happened.
The exhaustion hit all of you at once.
One by one, you all stopped pretending you werenât tired.
Yelena curled up beside you, legs tangled with yours, chin resting on the pillow between you.
John slid down to lie on the carpet, arms crossed over his chest like a soldier who could still sleep with one eye open.
Ava stretched out beside the couch, back against it as she put a hand over yours.
Alexei lowered himself onto the other couch with a dramatic groan, mumbling something about âtoo old for thisâ as he tucked a pillow behind his head.
Bobâs head tilted back and his breathing evened out.
And just like that, the common room became a patchwork nest of sleep. And it was some of the best sleep every one of you have had in a while.Â
â
An hour, maybe two, slipped by. Then, the elevator dinged.
You stirred, still in a haze, but some part of you registered the familiar sound of heavy boots followed by a duffel bag hitting the floor with a gentle thump, carefully placed rather than dropped.
âHey, sweetheart,â came Buckyâs voice.
Your eyes blinked open, just enough to catch a glimpse of him standing in the spill of hallway light. His hair was damp, rain clinging to the ends. His jacket bore flecks of concrete dust and char near the seams.Â
He looked like a man who hadnât stopped running home since he left.
âBuckyâŠâ you whispered, the name tangled in a yawn. âBaby⊠you came backâŠâ
Your words were fragile, barely more than breath, and already fading into the fog of dreams again.
Bucky stepped over John â who was still passed out on the floor, snoring like a freight train â and made his way to you without a sound. He crouched down by the couch and wrapped his hands around yours â the one not held by Avaâ and brought it to his lips to kiss your knuckles.Â
âIâm here,â he whispered, his voice cracking at the seam. âIâm so sorry I left.â
You made a nonsensical sound in response â half a word, maybe a memory. Something about rooftops, tea, jerky, his shirt. Nothing coherent, just the drift of half-dreams spilling from your lips. He knew you wouldnât remember any of this come morning.
But still, Bucky leaned in and kissed your forehead, letting his lips linger there. For the first time in days, he let himself breathe.
Then he looked up â and finally took the full picture in.Â
They were all there. The whole team, scattered in sleep around the living room like an improvised fortress. His girl â you â nestled safely in the center of it, wrapped in the arms of friends who had clearly refused to leave your side.
They looked worn down, but peaceful and content. Like being here, with each other, was exactly where they wanted to be.
So he moved quietly around the tower, opting for a quick shower and change of clothes. Then he walked to the hallway closet and gathered every spare blanket he could find.
One by one, he tucked them in.
He threw a thick crocheted navy blue throw over John, who mumbled something but didnât wake. A quilt draped gently across Yelena and Ava. One across Alexeiâs legs, already half off the couch,
Bob didnât even stir â just sighed, as Bucky knelt, and carefully tugged a fluffy yellow blanket under his chin. It was like Bob somehow knew Bucky was there.
On the coffee table, Bucky found a scrap of paper and scrawled a quick note, placing it where they would see it in the morning.
Thank you for taking care of my girl. â J.B.B
Then he returned to you.
He stood there for a moment, watching you sleep â curled up in the middle of everyone who had held the line while he was gone.Â
He was so in love with you â god help him â because all he could think about after the long mission was taking you back, holding you close, and not sharing you with anyone tonight.
So he picked you up in his arms effortlessly, like you belonged there, like heâd done it a thousand times and could do it a thousand more.
You stirred just a little, your cheek pressing into his chest.
âYouâre homeâŠâ you murmured again, barely awake.
âI am,â he whispered, brushing a kiss to your temple. âAnd Iâm not going anywhere.â
He carried you back to your shared room, the weight of the world finally lifting from his shoulders.
There, he laid you down and pulled the covers up over you both, sliding in with one arm around your waist, the other across your chest like a shield.
You were finally asleep in his arms, and he wasnât about to give the world a single piece of you until morning.
-end.
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