THEY ARE LIKE THE SAME I SWEAR

first off i wanna preface this by saying that i’m not actually a trans man/masc, but i had an experience with my mother in high school that i think definitely relates.

so i come from a super conservative fundamentalist christian household. like my mother has a fake ass degree in christian apologetics (if you don’t know what that is, you don’t wanna know) and helped found some crazy christian mom podcast dedicated to teaching parents how to “protect” their kids from secular culture. you know the type.

when i was 14 i was forced to come out as a lesbian. my parents completely freaked out and put me through fucking hell because of it. (i won’t go into details bc it doesn’t relate to this specific story but it was like. conversion therapy type shit. i was super isolated too, i wasn’t allowed outside the house except to go to my private christian school and they took my phone away)

anyway my mom is obviously super into conservative bullshit in general, but that summer she got ESPECIALLY into anti trans rhetoric, in particular anti trans masculinity rhetoric. i don’t think people realize how big this is, specifically in fundamentalist christian circles. they run with this idea of “the left is confusing young girls!! they’re targeting and preying on young girls into thinking that they can be men! they’re demonizing godly christian femininity!” and this idea gains fucking traction in these communities. for exactly the reason that you think that it does.

my mom made me go with her to some stupid conference, and there was this lady there who gave this awful speech on all trans men are really just confused, young, impressionable girls who need to embrace their god-ordained christian womanhood. i’ve been to many events like this one and heard a lot of bullshit but to this day i think that was the worst one. my blood fucking boils just remembering it.

at some point i couldn’t fucking take hearing that lady talk anymore bc i was fighting tears and shaking with rage and ran off into the bathroom. i’m not a trans man/masc, but i’m queer and oh i don’t know a fucking HUMAN, and my 14 year old self couldn’t take hearing that anymore. my mom found me in the bathroom and made a scene about it later.

i don’t know if it was that incident or if perhaps my mom thought so before and that’s why she dragged me to the conference, but she was incredibly strict with how i could dress and present myself from that point onward. all my life she’s been strict about what i could wear, but before then it was very much in a modesty-focused way. like, no short skirts, no tops that showed off my figure, no bikinis, no crop tops, etc. that all changed suddenly. suddenly i was forced to wear dresses, flattering tops, anything that looked stereotypically “feminine”. this drove me fucking crazy bc i don’t feel comfortable presenting myself super femininely. i don’t really usually present myself overtly masculinely either, but i definitely don’t like to be perceived as feminine.

even at the age of 14 i knew that my mother wanted control. she wanted power of my body, my sexuality, the clothes i wore, and even the fucking thoughts in my head. which really is just the same as the rest of the fundamentalist christian right.

The way mothers allow themselves to treat their daughters is already fucked up enough but when their kid is a trans man/masc it just gets so much worse. I’m literally not allowed baggy clothes, the simple and normal act of wearing baggy clothes, which is banned for me in particular because they don’t “frame my figure.” I should only be wearing clothes that cling to my body and show off my hips, and this is because my mum has some weird idea that if my “feminine form” isn’t on show at all times, I will turn into a masculine weirdo because I’ve already expressed my transness to her before and she’s doing everything in her power to stop it, and therefore I’m not even allowed the option of wearing baggy, loose fitted clothing. This is such a small example of the long list of things I’m not allowed to do in order to keep me from transitioning, but even something that small is incredibly fucked up to me because the level of control in forcing me to wear clothes that show off my “female” body to snuff out any masculinity is 100 times worse when you throw in the fucking immeasurable, painful dysphoria that I have to deal with by walking outside in clothes that basically have a neon sign over them telling people to look at the least favourite parts of my body.

And this is apparently normal, because mothers just want their daughters to be proud of who they are. And if those “daughters” happen to be trans men, it’s only in their best interest to detransition them back into daughters. Or whatever the fuck excuse we’ve given to them to treat their kids this way.

some catra faces i feel like ranting about

^^here have some silliness before the wounds below <3

their only direct interaction all of season 4 whyyyy does it kill me so much to know that. damnit. it's not all that surprising catra would feel it confirmed: adora's done with her. the look she gives catra after she hops out of the way just in time says only one thing to me- "dodge it or don't. idfc."

that little smile on catra's face when she says "don't sound so happy to hear me" - because she's so fucking happy to get to hear adora one more time. just kill me already, i'll even dig the grave myself aight

this is a darker thought forsure, just a heads up, but i've always been fairly certain (and i don't think it's an uncommon theory) that at some point between catra's ragged breathing in adora's arms and her complete lack of breath when she attempts to heal her - catra has actually died. and i've kinda come to theorize this is the moment she exhales her last as her head tips back and to the side, looking up at adora and almost sorta smiling. it would make sense too as to why adora doesn't bother much with tryna be careful w her after that point - it becomes more crucial to get her out of there and somewhere safe for her to try n heal her asap.

and the moment catra sees adora just gave up. the first time she yells her name cause she knows that's what adora had just done. are you fcking kidding me 💔🪦

and closing w this one cause well the way adora smiles when she looks at her is just dumb amounts of sweet <3

stop it hurts :((((((

jumping into the abyss goodbyeeeeeeeee

FOUNDERS OF YURI 💜🩷

i love being a weird girl ♡

The core of Catra and Adria’s relationship is that they value each other more than any mistake the other could or did make. Something about seeing that kind of forgiveness and grace in a context that very clearly parallels ex Christian experiences rewires my brain.

<3

I know everyone’s already drawn future Catradora dancing but shhhh, I love them, they’re perfect ❤️

If I had a nickel for every time the universe was saved from annihilation by gay love, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's delightful that it happened twice.

Bonus homoerotic tension glitching frenemies.

they are so beautiful ₊˚⊹♡

beach episode! 🌺

the actual fucking chills that i get listening to perverts ♡