Littlecigs - Out Of Body

Kay Redfield Jamison, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness

I feel like I have no valid reason to complain about the direction my life is going in. I mean it's my fault right? Like in the end it's not really the mental illness that made me stop going to college and move away from my family. Like in the end those were decisions I made right? It doesn't matter that I was depressed and it doesn't matter that I've got impulse issues. In the end it was me who chose this.

It gets so old watching people have and get the things you so badly want. I just sit there hoping one day, it'll be me. But I've hoped for so long with so little in return that I'm finally starting to realize that it will never be me. I was born with the promise of being pitiful and undeserving.

non sexual intimacy!!!! bathing together, washing each other, playing with each other's hair, kissing every inch of their body, writing love letters on their back with your finger, connecting their moles and freckles to create constellations on their skin, running your hands up and down their thighs, ugh just expressing physical love without it having to be about sex!!!!

tear me to shreds

I'm sick of this mad, mad world

make me someone's bride and count to ten

then blow my head out at the alter

I'm sick of this mad, mad world

I'm sick of the people

I'm sick of the doctors

I'm sick of YOU telling ME what's wrong with MY head

when it's MY head and NOT YOURS

make me into someone's dinner and say a prayer

tear me to shreds

I don't care

::::)))))))