D: So. Did They Give You A Name Along With All Those Rippling Pectorals? H: Aha, Uhh, I-I-I’m, Er,

—Night before Danny’s last final at Gotham University—

Asshole neighbor 3 doors down: *starts playing music so loud it’s rattling people’s teeth at 11:00 PM*

Danny: Hmm.

Danny: Hey goooogle, does Gotham have cash bail?

Danny: Dammit.

Danny, reaching for the creep stick anyways: Hey goooogle, how much does it cost to bribe a Gotham cop?

Danny: *pauses to read*

Danny: That’s a really specific answer, but at least it’s affordable.

what if we took the kid from this post …

AND GAVE HIM THE BACKGROUND/PERSONALITY OF THIS POST

AND MAYBE WE CALL HIM GREG OR SOMETHING.

In the Danny is Damian’s brother trope what if instead of Damian not telling the family about Danny wasn’t because of grief or shame or any of the more commonly used reasons for his silence. What if it was because he heard about how his father talked about Jason after his death, focusing and exaggerating the negative. That he was violent, angry, never listened to orders but in some iterations and popular fanon is that Jason was a cheerful and studious Robin.

What if while compiling info and researching the former robins during his tumultuous introduction he saw what kind of robin Jason was, good with kids and victims. Talking about his favorite books while on patrol and similar. Reminding Damian of his most Beloved brother.

Then he finds out about how Bruce talked about Jason after he died. Using him as an example as what not to do, erasing his good traits and just using him as a cautionary tale of what happens when you don’t follow orders. Just like what Ra’s said about Danny.

So he didn’t tell the family, not out of guilt or grief. But because his father stripped away Jason’s positive traits after death, the son he chose, adopted and loved. Who when he failed because he was a child led astray by his mother. What would he do to his brother, who loved the stars and excelled in stealth, who was quite in his kills but had no lust for killing.

Whether or not Bruce would do this to Danny’s memory doesn’t matter. B’s actions are gonna affect how Damian views his father even years after the initial actions. Because Damian will protect his brothers memory from being twisted even by their father.

Jason’s allergic to asking for help from Batman, sure. Maybe he thinks Bruce won’t help without an agreement to follow his code, maybe he thinks Bruce will help and is afraid of that, but for whatever reason, he’s not going to ask Batman for help. But he’s also not incapable of realizing that he really, really needs help right now.

So he calls up his replacement and tells Tim that if he helps out with this one trafficking ring before they leave Gotham tonight, he’ll stop trying to kill him.

Well, Tim agrees of course, and he sees an opportunity. Not to increase his own likelihood of survival, but to bring Jason home. All he needs is a foothold, and Jason just offered it up on a golden platter.

The mission goes off without a hitch. Two days later, Tim shows up in the middle of Red Hood’s patrol with a flash drive of information. And Red Hood tells Tim that he better go away, because promising no lethal force doesn’t mean he can’t do any damage. Tim just shrugs. Jason doesn’t know it, but he’s already lost.

Two months later, Tim is sitting in one of Jason’s safehouses that he wasn’t supposed to know about, while Jason is making cookies and ranting about George Wickham. Suddenly, he freezes. It occurs to him how insane this is. Two months ago he wanted the Replacement dead, and now he’s making cookies after they teamed up to play a revenge prank on Bruce. “How did this even happen?” He asks Tim in horror.

Tim grabs a cookie, takes a bite menacingly and says: “You know the book, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie? I’m the mouse.”

Kon falls into the ocean, exhausted, and genuinely doesn't think this is going to end well for him. He's gonna faint in the middle of the ocean, where he'll sink to where the sun can't reach him. He won't be able to do the weird photosynthesis thing he and Kal do in space. He's gonna drown. Then he's, like, suddenly Prince Eric? From the Little Mermaid? But the Mermaid is way hotter and also a dude.

He's underwater, and very deep. He can feel himself fading out, black creeping along the edge of his vision.

Then, there's movement.

A very large mermaid - sorry, merdude - with glowing green freckles and crystalline, snowy hair. He's roughly the size of an Orca, and has the coloration of one aside from the freckles and vivid, glowing green eyes.

The merdude reaches out, very gently cradles Kon in his hands, and Kon's exhaustion catches up to him. Kon blacks out.

Kon wakes up on a California beach, alone.

He immediately tries to reach out to Aquaman; he's gotta find that merguy and uh...thank him. Maybe ask him out. He's not sure how he'd date someone the size of an Orca Whale, but he's Superboy; he'll figure it out.

~~~~~~

Aquaman has no idea what Superboy is talking about; there is no race of mer that large. He'd know, he's the King of Atlantis. Superboy keeps telling him he's wrong, though.

And the more he looks into it, the more he's hearing rumors of a very large, very ancient mer that spends their time lounging around old shipwrecks.

A mer that disappears the second anyone tries to approach them.

A ghost.

Or; Danny was lazing about in the ocean, searching for treasure from sunken ships (Sam said he needed a hobby), using his larger, slightly more eldrich ghost form with the tail. Call him cringe, but it feels more fitting to be in the ocean with that form. Makes him feel all majestic and the like. He comes across a hero floating in the ocean. One he vaguely recognizes as a member of Young Justice? They're in like...California. Somewhere. He decides to play taxi. There are consequences. One of those consequences may or may not be a date.

From Chapter 12 of Cat's Eyes by MalaMari

RED HOOD TIM DRAKE RED HOOD TIM DRAKE RED HOOD TIM DRA

9 year old Dick: If you’re a friendless loser and you know it, clap your hands!

Bruce:

Dick: Clap. Your. Hands.

Bruce: *clap clap*

———

12 year old Jason: HEY YOU!

Jason: HEEEEEY YOU!

Jason: HEY! YOU!

Bruce: It’s not polite to not call people by their names, Robin.

Jason: Nice try, Hey You. I know my mentor’s name.

———

13 year old Tim: You see this coffee, Bruce?

Bruce: Thank you for making this for m-

Tim: This is my coffee. You are having water. Only people who don’t break mugger’s fingers get coffee.

———

Clark: Batman, your Robins are so polite. They must have been a joy to raise.

Bruce, through clenched teeth: Such a joy.

Birthday gift for @ilgaksu, my fav adorable murder baby :d  Art is supposed to go with the fic your love is bright as ever that @apvrrish wrote (go read it it’s adorable); it’s part of the Olympics AU that she and ilgaksu made!

the biggest lie i ever told & how my husband came to protect it

for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and it makes me gag and makes my throat feel gross after eating it and so i don’t really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don’t like peanut butter they’d get all defensive like “peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!” and then i’d have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds.

but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i’m just allergic to peanuts because that way it’s not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter - it’s now like i’m a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me.

but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i’m at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn’t eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret. 

and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, “i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes.”

and if that isn’t love then i don’t know what is.