The Last Of My NJ Headcanons. Now Let It Be Known That There Will Probably Be More In The Future, Considering

The last of my NJ headcanons. Now let it be known that there will probably be more in the future, considering he is my favorite, HOWEVER this is all I have for now lol.

New Jersey-

Normally is presenting more as Central Jersey, his tics are from North and South trying to speak at the same time

Because of slightly demonic magic, Jersey is fractured like how his state is, there’s North, South, and Central, they can all split into their own persons with North looking the same, but not for too long

While Jersey has used many names during his life, the one his mothers gave him is the only few actually know, Jonah Eriksson Bakker, Eriksson being his Mother’s last name and Bakker his Ma’s

Despite it being hundreds of years, he still isn’t used to English, words never come out quite right, there’s almost always something just slightly missed pronounced even when taking his accent into account

If he’s upset or tired he has a pretty heavy lisp, which along with his already heavy accent when feeling any emotion makes him pretty impossible to understand, the only ones that do are York, Del, and surprisingly Penn

Likes to call New York ‘Yorkie’ Vermont ‘Monty’ Kentucky ‘Ken’ (he’s the only one allowed too) California ‘Westie’ Florida ‘Dia’ ‘Sunshine’ or ‘Flo Rida’ and says Texas like how a Russian would (he has no idea why he started to he just did one day)

The Jersey Devil is real, Jerseys met it multiple times in his life, sometimes they exist in the same space in the Pine Barrens, but most times they don’t

Jersey has a Jersey Devil plush, had it since he was a young child, it’s his prized possession along with one of Connie’s books from the 1850s that he ‘borrowed’ 

When he was younger, Jersey would go to Devil’s Tree to read, it's how he learn the hard way, that his not father father is not the only demon that resides in NJ

In contrast to York, Jersey LOVES drop towers, thinks that they are the second best theme park flat ride to ever exist (the first are those super scramblers that flip while spinning)

Threw his shoe at York so much that Penn ended up buying him sandals as a joke, a joke that Jersey didn’t understand until YEARS later, he still loves and uses those sandals, his aim is unmatched when it comes to hitting York

Would get hit by Yorkie every time he said the R word (which he still doesn't fully believe is a slur but whatever Yorkie), this was specifically during the 2000s

Has brought every State to Action Park at least once when it was still open, it’s best not to question how he convinced Alaska and Hawaii or literally any other State, it’s just best not too

Jersey has a little devil that could in theory be related to the Jersey Devil, it's name is Impy

More Posts from Kyistell and Others

2 years ago
Day 15: ImpulseSV (with Nothing Happening In The Background At All)

Day 15: ImpulseSV (with nothing happening in the background at all)

This took me a while, all of yesterday I was procrastinating by reading and then I took a "nap", when I woke up I procrastinated more and continued reading before finally starting to draw...then I put on Rens S8 because LORE and then I started watching Rens S9 and so this took far longer than it realistically should have lolz


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1 year ago

I just cannot wait for the day Lindy Ruff is fired.

I am tired of having the tiny hope I have be taken away every damn game.

I am tired of seeing the players, who are clearly just dun not in the sense that they aren't trying but in the sense that they have gotten used to the disappointment that is this season, be exhausted every game, especially when players like Daws, L. Hughes and literally anyone else who is showing signs of stress clearly aren't playing in tiptop shape.

I am tired of Lindy sounded disappointed any time he is on screen, no matter if we do well or not that game, it's consistent disappointment and disinterest when I hear him talk and it sucks.

I am tired of New Jersey somehow finding a way to be a joke even in the sports world with our ONLY major professional, this team is many people only knowledge of Jersey and yet we are STILL a joke or something to just not be respected.

I am tired of every game where everyone is sure this just HAS to be Lindy's last game and yet somehow he is still there the next time we play, that somehow someway he probably won't be fired till the end of the season and EVEN THEN who knows if he actually will me.

I am tired and over it but I'll still be watching the games, I'll still be there when we lose once again, I'll still be there talking to Sky saying shit about how much I hate Lindy and how he is running this team into the ground, I'll still be complaining about Ruff to my parents because they have to know everything wrong going on.

I'll still be here because just because a team is doing shit doesn't mean you should drop it just because of that, that just shows you weren't actually a fan in my opinion.

I have far too much state pride for my own good because I genuinely love this state and love this team, so I'll stick through the good and the bad, continue to be slightly angry with myself for not being able to get into hockey last year when we were badass.

And I'll still be watching and eventually buy more stuff for the Devils because let's be real, the second that sales drop and the Devs aren't as popular the club isn't stay in Jersey, so might as well support the bastards ya know?

And hey, who knows, maybe one day we shall see Lindy gone and this team flourishing, but until then I'll just keep being sorta upset that we aren't doing as well as we can and drinking my problems away (this is a joke and I promise it's just water, Liquid Death specifically).


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1 year ago

ITS SNOWING

EEEEEEE IM SO HAPPY.

So its been snowing for a few hours now but whatever I’m still happy AND my dad made hot chocolate so it truly is the winter experience, god I love Jersey


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1 year ago

After several criminal acts that didn’t land them in prison ONLY because Gov stepped in (and one of those times he had to pull so many strings it was terrifying), Utah and Arizona were no longer allowed alone for more than five minutes.

Not many duos can be worse than Florida and Loui, but damn do Utah and Ari come very close.

The Good Boy™️ and The Hot Chaos Coyote™️ an amazingly disastrous duo that literally no one expected

Wassua broski, got any Arizona and NJ HCs up in that fancy brain of yours?

Moi? Fancy? Oh stawpppppp 🤭🤭🤭🤭

I sadly don’t have any NJ hc’s, but I do have some for Arizona (old home state! :D)

He’s 100% the Florida of the West, just less humidity.

Everyone loves him :3 No one hates him. If they do,,,,,, we’ll deal with that very quickly <3

Ari is the himbo ever <3

You may call him Ari, but if you call him Zona, he mightttttt shank you repeatedly (:

He experiences the equivalent of someone saying they’re from NY and then getting asked "what’s the city like?", but with Phoenix.

He can touch hot stuff without getting hurt (guess that’s how he’s able to touch NM huh?) and it makes the other states question his abilities

One of the only people to get the stick out of Utah’s ass and allow him to actually go have fun. Alas, the puppy eyes were too great for Utah 😔✊

As much as he loves summer, it’s an absolute nightmare sometimes cuz of his curly hair 💀 (<- coming from a curly/wavy haired person)

His hair is a sorta orange-ish brown cuz he tried bleaching it to die it, but failed and it ended up turning that color. It looks nice though, so he’s not complaining.


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10 months ago

Hand over the Texas hc's 🔫🥰

*not forcing ofc!! <3*

HIII!!! I wanted to get this done sooner but had to transition my brain from "OUTSIDE WOOOO" to "Sit yo ass down BOI" so this took a little...oops? BUT here ya go!!!

Texas-

*Slaps on back of the head* Oh this bad boy can fit SO much trauma

He has a human family but boy is he not human, he’s closer to human than Jersey and Maryland but whatever he is sure ain’t human

LOVES Transformers, the movies, shows, comics, all of it (whata nerd)

He’s very easy to become friends with so long as you give him the chance and you’re not at The Table

He’s a lovable dumbass and if one cannot handle that then one shall not be friends with sir cowboy

Surprisingly friends with New Jersey, they got closer after teaching each other how to cook certain things (Brisket and Pizza)

Adores cuddles, whether he’s big spoon or little spoon, he love ‘em

Is decently good friends with California, they may not agree on everything but the two been slowly learning that you don’t have to be friends with just those that share your same views and beliefs (a hard lesson for both to understand)

Oh you best believe this boy has become super best friends with Alberta, how could he not!? They are literally Walmart him!!

Used to go into the rivers near his home to dive for treasure, almost always found guns, so much so that he had to stop as his collection was a bit too big to take care of them all (he gave some to other states over time)

Oh wait yeah *clears throat* ✨~Guns~✨ 

He loves bats, thinks they are the most adorable little weirdos in the world and will do ANYTHING to protect them

Oh does he love to dance, will always find a victim someone to dance with, somehow always ends up being Oklahoma

He doesn’t really understand hockey but he’s trying (the southern states with teams are making sure of that) and he does understand why it’s popular, it’s the ✨~violence~✨

He will get what he wants, one way or another, no matter how long it takes and if he only has what he wants for a minute or two, he will get it.


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9 months ago

*Talking about someone blowing Tyler up*

Tyler: Ah, those were the days

Human: That was three days ago


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kyistell - A Random Kyi
A Random Kyi

Hi I'm Kyi, I am a minor, I don't really know how to tumblr so enjoy the random stuff I end up posting

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