I Will No Longer Be Using This Blog Because She Died

Dammit John. We sang it again...bastard.

Just...one more...

I love tumblr. I love that tumblr is the best social media site of 2021.

Every other site has spent the last decade perfecting the art of targeted ads. I am a wallet of flesh and blood which must be stripped bare and profiled and picked apart for the maximally efficient way to squeeze profit from my presence. Every other site will fold and morph itself to a shape of my liking - like a fairy tale trickster stealing memories and taking their mold - to lull me into compliance and loosen my coin purse.

Facebook sees me searching fitness equipment and injects my timeline with athletic wear ads. Reddit profiles the subreddits I follow and eagerly promotes a new coding bootcamp or cloud service at every turn. Google overhears me lamenting over my moving to-do list on voice call and fills in my “how much to tip movers” query before I’ve gotten the third word typed out.

Tumblr never even tried.

They could have. The information is there. The basic infrastructure, presumably, exists. Tumblr can recommend me tags based on tags I follow, blogs based on blogs I follow, even posts that for one reason or another may strike my fancy. Tumblr could be - SHOULD be - funneling this framework into advertising, as the only means that free-to-use social media platforms can turn a profit in our capitalistic hellscape.

They just don’t.

Today I saw an ad for treating Hyperhidrosis - a condition, I think, in which a person sweats too much - and I saw it twice, four posts apart, and it is so incredibly benignly impersonally ineptly untargeted toward me compared to all other pinpoint-aimed advertising that I’m endeared to it. Tumblr knows NOTHING about me. 8 years, 51,000 likes, and tumblr has not learned a THING about me.

Advertisements for a mattress? Shitty mobile game ads that don’t make even the slightest pretense at being anything other than a candy crush rip-off? Choose-your-own adventure games either about Royal Espionage or Choosing The Wrong Dress For Your Date with ZERO in-between.

And then this. This here. The culmination, the crown-jewel of tumblr’s nihilistic non-compliance with the state of social media advertising. Any pretense of capitalistic exchange is abandoned at the gas station by the side of the road. This is not a company. This is not a product. This is not anything that fulfills the contract of consumer and seller. 

THIS. THIS IS WHAT TUMBLR HAS TO OFFER INSTEAD.

“Pour vinegar on your bread, fuck you.”

“Put it in the garbage, fuck you.”

“Your wife says you’re a fucking dumbass, fuck you.”

That’s it. That’s the advertisement. You vinegar-breadless cuck. You virgin extraordinaire bereft of bread and garbage can. I am fucking your wife right now in our vinegar-soaked motel bed. She puffs a cigarette which I pulled from the trashcan and we both laugh heartily at her recounts of your immasculine ineptitude. I don’t want your money. I don’t want anything from you. Fuck you. 

Amazing. Amazing. What a state of things to ring in 2021. What a great platform we all collectively choose to be on.

I was a lazy bum over the weekend and here's the crap that kept me entertained.

My weekend started when fifth period was over and when I was driving away from school like a civilized driver, not like a madman. When I got home I packed up and headed out to south Jersey to spend the weekend at my mom's and to babysit while she was at work and to spend quality time with her. While I was down there I was curious about my subscription to netflix on my xbox 360. I've have a membership deal with them and use my xbox to watch whatever movies they have on it. As I search up the movies I realize that I have a good amount of movies to watch while I basically vegetate my weekend away! To be frank, I'll just tell you the movies and give you my thoughts about them.

From Dusk Till Dawn- I remember seeing this movie on HBO as a kid. While watching this bloody nugget of a horror movie I was really into how damn gory this movie was and how insane the characters were. The vampires were just down right crazy as well. Being made by the hands of Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino, From Dusk Till Dawn has all sorts of small details to the batshit mad plot line. But then again what else would you expect from those two. George Clooney's performance is an interesting one since his character has to take care of a psychopathic sibling all the while they try to escape the U.S. and into Mexico.

Bunraku- Here's an interesting movie. Bunraku's genre is bend around abit. It's a western meets an action meets musical (just with violence instead of singing). The story basically tells of how the world ended with big bang and those who survived decided that guns were the culprit to their violent ways. So with all firearms thrown away this gave way for bladed weapons to return. In this world instead of guns the characters use their fists, swords, knives and wits to stay afloat in this crazed city ruled by Nickola (Ron Pearlman) and his 10 killers. The movie reminds me of High Plains Drifter due to John Hartnet's performance as The Drifter who wants to kill Nickola for unknown purposes. Woody Harrelson's role as The Bartender who bring The Drifter and The Samurai together as allies is an interesting role. Bunraku is an art movie with it's origami design sets and story telling and it's an action flick with it's endless amounts of sword play and ass kicking. Technically these were the only two movies I watched the rest of the weekend was spent playing Skyrim.

alopecia venonat

Sableye. Hell yes.

#302-Sableye

Sableye is so cool, yo.

DISGUSTED by obscene disrespectful artwork I have repeatedly seen with my own two eyes of Oogie Boogie with a humanlike dicko or vaginia despite the fucking fact we DANG DAMNED KNOW, BEYOND ANY CONCEIVABLE GODFUCKED DOUBT, CARL!!! that his junk would be a snake or a caterpillar or a couple of snails stuck together!!!!!!!!

Johfra Bosschart