Here's My Grass Is Greener Type Thought But I Wish I Was The Kind Of Neurodivergent Who Wasn't Always

“Life is too short to spend it at war with yourself.”

— Unknown

I feel this everyday...

“There are some things about myself I can’t explain to anyone. There are some things I don’t understand at all. I can’t tell what I think about things or what I’m after. I don’t know what my strengths are or what I’m supposed to do about them. But if I start thinking about these things in too much detail the whole thing gets scary. And if I get scared I can only think about myself. I become really self- centered, and without meaning to, I hurt people. So I’m not such a wonderful human being.”

— Haruki Murakami, The Elephant Vanishes

Working on it....I think?

Because it's better to be afraid of the thought of that person rather than the reality of that person.

“Why am I so afraid to lose you, when you aren’t even mine.”

— Unknown

Pretty much...

Moira Overwatch is my favorite Steven Universe tbh

A vicious cycle....

~ Reflection of Feelings

“There’s something I was chasing after, and I finally managed to get it. But once I did, it wasn’t as big of a deal as I thought. Now I’m wondering, if I go after something else, and get my hands on it, am I just gonna think I was happier during the chase? That’s like… total bullshit, isn’t it?”

- Denji (Chainsaw Man)

/ soft and smooth /

I'm not gonna lie.... I do feel this. From when I was kid, I'd always mimic the MCs in anime and cartoons. I personally loved the timeskips because for me, it was like I'm growing and learning along with them, showing off my newly acquired skills and feeling like others as well as myself could see those changes. But now... I'm moving faster than them... too fast but also too slow. There's now a disconnect in what I watch and its a quiet heartbreak that I've aged past them... Damn.

the fact that i'm no longer the same age as the protagonists of novels and films i once connected to is so heartbreaking. there was a time when I looked forward to turning their age. i did. and i also outgrew them. i continue to age, but they don't; never will. the immortality of fiction is beautiful, but cruel.