A True Kyman Fan

i try to dip my toes in the dbh fandom, and then i get reminded on why i don’t.

i’m just gonna stick to the tiktok edits for now 👽

Sometimes i get so excited about the show that i have to bite my hand and or scream Im totally normal btw

kyle looks so horrified 😭😭😭

Kymanvweek Day 3: exchange

screamed with joy

me and 10 other caitmaddie fans cheered

lil gender (ig?) dysphoria vent ^__^

worst part about being unlabeled (mainly because labels are uncomfortable to you) for me is that my feelings towards gender identity are fluid—so much so that i used to be genderfluid and pronounfluid but all the labels were confusing.

I felt like I was constantly boxing my identity instead of living it to the fullest. (if that makes sense?)

The thing is—when you say you’re “unlabeled” (in which i sometimes feel dysphoric for labeling the term and other times not)

people usually opt for all gender neutral terminology, and I have nothing against gender neutral terms, like I said my feelings are fluid which in itself is so annoying.

because like?? one moment i’m like “this is it, I’m actually just [label] i’ve finally figured myself out” and then my feelings change.

i genuinely have NO CLUE why i’m like this, and it’s frustrating, i do stay with genderfluid crowds when i’m having these issues but even then I don’t want to label myself—especially when my feelings change and it makes me feel dysphoric.

but back to what i was saying, i have nothing against gender neutral terms, and also like i said I sometimes prefer them. but sometimes when it’s ONLY and STRICTLY gender neutral terms i feel dysphoric because sometimes i don’t feel gender neutral.

but i feel uncomfortable hounding anyone about my gender identity (and it’s shifts (and because i mainly have a white cishet christian conservative community and i’d rather not be publicly outed and shamed)) so i just sit through the dysphoria.

i just hate not knowing, i hate it fluctuating and i hate not having a solid feeling about my gender. i look at other lgbtq people in the community who seem like they have it all figured out—hell i look at other genderfluid people who also look like they have it all figured out too—but i don’t.

there’s not much i can do, and i know people will say (as they always have) that it’s a phase—which is like

1) life is all a bunch of phases

2) what do i do when my phases constantly change and have been changing most of my life?

i don’t expect to be accommodated 24/7 about this—trust me it’d be nice but i understand there are people in need who’s priorities are higher in which i want them to be accommodated first before anyone else.

i just dream of the day i have a small close knit group of other people who not only relate but are able to help validate me through my identity.

this might also be a relevant time to wonder if i may have autism or adhd. not saying that i have either

(although i’ve been getting close to self diagnosed and i’ve been wanting a screening for awhile)

or that having either is in any way inherent connected to my feelings in general—but i have a hunch,, suspicion,, dare i say hope? to maybe explain it all to me?

sorry if i don’t make sense this is just me rambling :>

motivating me to learn my family’s native tongue

Hindi is not difficult. reading in Hindi is not difficult. writing in Hindi is not difficult. counting in Hindi is not difficult. Hindi numbers are not difficult (१२३४५६७८९०). alphabets क्ष,ष,फ are not difficult. you just consume, are surrounded by and have been taught english and the latin alphabets way more than your native language and script use some sense

(this goes for any language not just hindi btw)

rewatching the end of obesity special and all the times kyle grabs erics hands and drags him is so funny because eric is not fighting him at all he’s allowing kyle to drag him around.

i dont know how much more eyerolling i can do when someone says meljay is all based off of mel manipulating jayce. none of you would even be thinking this if not for jayce’s line in s2 when him and mel reunited. Which he randomly threw it out there. that pissed me off because clearly she loved him beyond just his abilites. My god.

my reason to live

papyrus day

#602

It is papyrus day today.

“Mel and Jayce had a one time hookup” NO???

Y’all do realize that in the 7 years it took to get Hextech up and running Mel and Jayce were very much still in contact with each other…right? That them getting together wasn’t just this random thing? You don’t need to have that shown on screen. Use your brains