đYandere!Pro-Hero!Shinso Hitoshi x F!Readerđ
9k words
Written for everyone who voted Shinso on my poll :) title from this song
Summary:Â
You just canât help yourself sometimes. Luckily, your favourite pro-hero is here to do it for you.
TWs for: Rape | Noncon, suicide, sexual harassment, alcohol use
Tags:
Gradual yandere, shinso is a closet yandere for most of this but its a lil obvious đł, reader really likes shinso, pussy eating, cat adoption, two kinds of pussy in this fic, romance, yes it is a travis scott song wtf r u gonna do abt it
(a/n) i really like shinso đ© writing him as a yandere is lowkey hard because i see him as such FINE boyfriend material
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Heâs your favourite pro-hero. A few of your friends have never heard of him but you donât care. He works in silence, subtly, nobly refusing the attention he would get for his work had he perhaps been a bit flashier, a bit bolder. Heâs all about helping the underdog, understanding why people commit crimes and cutting it off at the roots.
The most you really see of him online- when youâre not on fan-forums or the local news- is long posts of people detailing all the things that heâs done and talking about how he deserves more recognition.
âShinsoâs so underrated!â They say. âHeâs volunteering, he actually works with the police to make sure people donât reoffend!â - followed by a few rare gifs of him in action.
But yet, he stays off the top ten. The teens, even. He collaborates when he needs to, and gives his teammates a leg up on surpassing others on the billboard by allowing them to take the credit.
Keep reading
LivâŠâŠthis senario with Levi.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTdbjkgnB/
vi i have been hanging onto this ask for SO long hoping that one day i would be strong enough to write this into a full fic but i need the world to see into your big sexy brain bc this is DELICIOUS
glass houses levi ackerman/f!reader (aot) word count: 1.2k tags: en ess eff double yew, age gap, voyeurism, stripping, mentions of masturbation
18+ MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT
Older neighbour!Levi who has all of his things unpacked within the first few hours of moving in, cardboard boxes broken down and tucked neatly away as quickly as they appear. You don't even really notice it happen; one day the apartment across the courtyard between your buildings was empty, and the next he's there.
So can you really be blamed for the fact that you aren't expecting a spectator when you start to peel your clothes off in front of your open window after a long, gruelling day at work? Your bones are weary, your shower is calling to you, and your neighbour is watching you undress.
The thin silky robe you pull on after you duck down out of sight feels insufficient to cover your body after you've been spotted--the humiliation leaving you feeling acutely bare as you peek your head up over the windowsill enough to see if he's still looking as raptly as he had been a moment prior.
He is.
At least he seems to have a sense of humour about it, if the wry little smile he shoots you with his hand placed over his eyes in a faux-display of coyness is anything to go by.
He doesn't have much by way of decor or furniture--a minimalist if you've ever seen one--but everything he does have that you can see from the vantage point of your own apartment is tasteful and expensive. It's one of the first things you notice when you risk another glance in the direction of his apartment the next morning, the second is a fleeting glimpse of him with a mug in his hand--and the sighting has you skittering quickly away, your heart pounding in your chest as rapidly as it had been when you weren't wearing any clothes, in spite of the fact that now you're fully dressed.
You're not sure what makes you do it again that second night. Maybe it's the cheap wine you've been drinking, maybe you're lonely, maybe you're craving that same adrenaline rush that you'd felt the night before when his eyes were the only thing on your skin.
You take your time undressing in front of your window this time, putting on a bit of a show. You know he's there even without looking. You'd caught a glimpse of him, on that same spot on his couch, with another glass of red wine in his hand--but more than that you can feel his eyes on you again.
It feels even better than it did the first time.
It becomes a routine after that. Your new neighbour settling in with his glass of wine every night to watch you painstakingly strip yourself bare for him. It feels like an eternity passes as you're slowly pulling off every article of your clothing until there's absolutely nothing left, and somehow every night that eternity seems to pass a little faster--leaving you with the feeling that you wish it had lasted just a little bit longer. That his stare had lingered on you just a little while more.
He never touches himself. No matter how tantalizingly you let your own touch linger on your body, how gently you graze the soft dips and swells of your own form. It drives you crazy, leaves you panting and moaning as you fuck your own fingers in the the privacy of your bathroom a short time later--but somewhere distantly you recognize that maybe that's the point.
The day you (inevitably, finally) meet him face to face in the little courtyard nestled between your homes you're taken aback by how handsome of a man he is up close.
He's older than you--that's certain now that you see him in all his glory--but he's aging gracefully. Time has exceedingly been kind to the angular, symmetrical lines of his face.
You don't know what to do. Or say. Part of you wants to turn heel and run for it, but instead you just laugh--breathy and light in the afternoon air.
"Hi," you say through your giggles, a hand reaching up to cover your flushing, burning cheek.
"Hello," he greets you with a polite dip of his head and a little smile of his own.
You tell him your name. Because what else are you supposed to say to the man who's been watching you get naked for the past 9 days? Who's watched you work your own nipples into sensitive little peaks just for the thrill? Who's seen you trail your fingers down down down between your legs under the guise of pulling off your panties?
"I'm Levi," he says, and hearing the way he says it nearly makes you tremble. Watching his lips form the shape of his own name makes you ache in the deepest part of your core.
"It's nice you meet you," you say softly.
Properly, that is.
He smirks slightly, then he hums.
The air between you feels too thin, too charged for a first meeting, too familiar for two strangers to be sharing between them.
"Have you lived here long?" Levi asks, and you have the fleeting thought that if he doesn't stop talking soon you're going to get to used to it, too attached to the very sound of it.
"Two years," you reply. "I moved here when I graduated college and started working."
He makes a little sound of recognition befitting of the small talk the two of you are sharing, but his gaze is piercing. He's appraising you. Sizing you up. Undressing you with his eyes in the same way he's watched you do with your own two hands.
"Well," you clear your throat, taking a step back towards your building, "I guess I should-"
His hand moves quickly, extending towards you. You pause, staring down at it, and the little card tucked between two fingers as he holds it out in your direction.
You pluck it slowly from his grasp, and turn it over in your hand.
Levi Ackerman, CEO ACKERMAN CORP.
You swallow as you read the credentials on the business card. The name, the title. The email address, office number, and fax details. Finally, the neatly scribbled series of digits on the lower righthand corner of the simple but tastefully designed card.
"My cell number." Levi anticipates the question before you can voice it, and your eyes flicker up toward him, greeted with a gaze of molten steel that threatens to drown you under it's weight. "If you ever need anything, or would like to grab a drink."
"I'm not much of a red wine fan," you say, setting out with the intention of levity but the words are too breathless to be teasing.
He smirks, clicking his tongue behind his straight white teeth. "I'll get you anything you'd like."
Your heartbeat thrums under your skin.
"Alright, Mr. Ackerman."
"Levi," he corrects you pointedly.
"Levi," you repeat, and you like the way his name tastes on your tongue. You wonder if he tastes just as sweet.
You turn towards your building, pausing once you take a single step away.
You turn back, glancing at him over your shoulder. He's already started in the direction of his own building.
"Levi?" you call towards him and he pauses, turning back to face you once more.
His brow quirks curiously.
You smile.
"Welcome to the neighbourhood."
Title: Negligence.
Pairing: Yan!Geto Suguru x Reader x Yan!Gojo Satoru (JJK).
A Continuation of Nursle.
Word Count: 9.0k.
TW: Dub/Con - Non/Con, Fem!Reader, Unhealthy Relationships, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Kidnapping, Mentions of Pregnancy/Childbirth, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Lactation, Geto and Gojo Have Their Own Thing Going On That Is Entirely Separate From The Events of This Fic, and Age Gaps. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.
[Part One] [Part Two]
Suguru wouldnât let you hold Himari.
Youâd offered to as he led you out of Suguruâs apartment, reached for her instinctively as he gently urged you into the passenger seat of a familiar black car, but Suguru was in a fugue state â eyes glassy, voice softened and tempered, a glazed smile painted over his lips. He kept Himari pressed against his shoulder, and then, when she started to stir, in his lap, bouncing idly on his knee as he drove. It was dangerous â for Himari and for you. You were tempted to tell him that, to insist on holding the daughter that wasnât supposed to belong to him, but then you remembered that he was a cult leader and a kidnapper and a murderer and you kept your mouth shut.
Instead, you kept your hands tucked between your thighs and your eyes focused on the passing landscape, on Tokyo as it dwindled from skyscrapers to rustic storefronts to backwoods. You thought of Megumi, first, surprisingly. Even if he didnât spend the night with Satoru, heâd notice if you werenât in class, tomorrow. Heâd be worried.
You wondered if Nanako and Mimiko had been worried when they suddenly couldnât find you in Suguruâs bedroom, where youâd spent the days following Himariâs birth recovering, when you stopped appearing at Suguruâs temple with a folder of worksheets and enough candy to keep two girls under ten engaged for a full ninety minutes. You wondered how Suguru explained your absence, if he bothered to explain it at all. You wondered how long theyâd hold it against you.
It was getting dark by the time you left the city entirely. With the setting sun to your backs, Suguru slipped onto a deserted seaside road and, still in that gentle tone, broke the silence. âWas it different?â And then, as Himari sniffled, âWith him, I mean. Different than it was for us.â
It took you a moment to realize that he was talking, another to recognize that you were supposed to answer. It was less that you were lost in thought and more that you were lost in the absence of it â your mind a vague, cloudy haze of static and fog and every other grey, disembodied, terrible thing that could seep its way into your consciousness and leave you entirely blank, entirely numb. It was all you could do to remember how to open your mouth, let alone piece an intelligent response together. âWith Satoru?â
âSatoru,â Suguru repeated, almost disdainfully. âIt took you months to call by my given name.â
You couldnât deny that, although part of you was tempted to try. Because it was true. Because it had.
Because it was different â or, it had been, at least. Things had moved so quickly, with Satoru. Heâd gone from a stranger to a stalker to something not totally unlike a partner in a handful of hours, and youâd watched it all from a distance, never fully able to shake that strange sense of liminality. He was rich, and stable, and heâd never suggested that you quit your job or attempted to lock you up in his mansion of an apartment, as trapped as youâd felt. Heâd raped you, but you couldnât say you believed Suguru wouldnât have, had you not been so terrified of what would happen if you ever tried to remove any part of yourself from his control. You knew, rationally, that they had to be around the same age, that Satoru shared every quirk and every immaturity thatâd once made you disgusted to so much consider Suguru in a romantic light, but it was different. When you first met Satoru, youâd seen him as a parent, a provider, a man who wanted to raise your daughter (albeit, with or without your consent). When you first met Suguru, youâd seen him as a boy who fell asleep in temple gardens and pretended not to be as scared as he really was, and if you were being entirely honest with yourself, youâd never really been able to stop seeing him that way. Â
Suguru clicked his tongue. He still wanted an answer, but it was all you could do to shrug, to let your gaze drift back to the passing landscape. âI donât know,â you admitted. âI donât think I wouldâve wanted to marry him either, if heâd asked me to.â
You heard Suguru shift, the engine rev. He started to say something, but a shrill, ear-piercing, howl of a cry cut him off. You didnât need to check to know it was Himari, and to know why.
âSheâs hungry.â You spoke without thinking, snapping toward your daughter. Youâd been on your way to feed her when you found Suguru next to her cradle, meaning she was already more than an hour past due. Himari didnât cry often, but when she did, it was usually for a good reason. Yet another trait that mustâve come from Suguru â had she taken more closely after you, she might not have done anything but cry.
Something crossed across Suguruâs expression; a flash of irritation, a spark of anger, but nothing more violent, nothing lasting. He cooled back into stoic neutrality as one of his hands fell away from the wheel and to the back of your daughterâs onesie â lifting her out of her lap and depositing her unceremoniously in your arms, his eyes never leaving the road. âCan you take care of it?â
It. You had to dig your teeth into the side of your tongue just to stop from saying something youâd regret, from telling him not to talk about your daughter like some unfeeling, inanimate object, not to talk about her at all. You were in a car with a murderer, and you couldnât forget that just because of some misplaced, motherly paranoia.
Instead, you looked around for a jacket, a blanket, something to cover yourself with, and when you found the car utterly and entirely barren, you settled for turning away from him and struggling the sleeve of your dress off of your shoulder. You went through the motions mechanically, automatically â cooing and running your fingers through Himariâs soft hair as she latched on, little hands grasping the scrunched fabric of your dress as she practically fed herself. You preferred formula, especially with Satoru breathing down your neck, but you didnât have much of a choice.
A minute passed in relative silence, Himariâs crying slowly fading back into her usual incoherent, but relatively cheerful babbling. Eventually, her little eyes fluttered shut, and you pulled her away, holding her against your shoulder as she fell asleep. When sheâd gone quiet, Suguru glanced toward you out of the corner of his eye. You saw him stiffen, straighten, then felt the car veer off the road and come to an abrupt, jeering stop.
You held Himari that much closer as Suguru let himself out. He took his time â his fingertips brushing over the hood as he made his way to your side of the vehicle, opening your door and nodding to the side. âYou can leave her on the seat. I promise, Iâll try to be fast.â
You clung to Himari, who shifted restlessly against you. âYou really canât leave newborns unattended, she mightââ
âIâll be fast.â That smile was back in full force, albeit cast in shadow by the quickly dimming light. âIâve missed you.â
You didnât want to, but he was using that tone, again â the one that meant he was already running out of patience. Leaving Himari tucked against the backrest, you let Suguru take your hand and pull you out of your seat. No sooner were you on your feet than the door was slammed shut behind you, then Suguruâs hands were on your waist, pinning you against the side of the car. The heat of the dark metal sapped into your back, your shoulders as Suguruâs mouth found its way to the side of your neck, the crook. âIâve missed you,â he repeated, his voice airy, edging on desperation. âI thought something happened to you. You were gone, and I couldnât find her, and I thought someone mustâve taken you, orââ
His voice cut out. He didnât draw back, but one of his hands fell away from your waist, reappearing on the neckline of your dress. His movements were hasty, rushed, like he couldnât tear the fabric off of your shoulders and down your chest quickly enough. You werenât wearing a bra, but even if you had been, you doubt it wouldâve been much more of a barrier. A chilled sea breeze washed over your exposed chest as Suguruâs mouth fell from your throat to your collarbone, and then to the curve of your breast, lingering. âWanted to do this since you got pregnant,â he muttered, as something heavy and spiked dropped from your diaphragm to the pit of your stomach. âHeld off for the baby, but sheâs had more than enough time with you.â
For a brief moment, every intelligent part of your mind seemed to slow, stall, then stop altogether. You opened your mouth, ready to ask what he meant, but unfortunately, you werenât given the chance to be so painfully oblivious.
Suguruâs lips latched onto your left nipple, and anything you mightâve said was replaced with a hitched whimper.
He was rougher than he really had to be, than his daughter had ever been. The only thing you could think to compare him to, deservedly, was Satoru; just as forceful, just as loud, just as sickeningly eager. The only difference was his tempo. Satoru had always been too giddy not to rush, eager to steal a kiss before you left for work or wake you up with a hand lodged between your thighs, but Suguru seemed content to act as if he had all the time in the world, as if you were somewhere more private than the shoulder of a public road. The flat of his tongue lulled over your nipple as he drank, his free hand coming up to paw at your other breast in almost meditative patterns. You tried to shut your eyes, to block out the wet sounds of his lips working against your skin, but as routine as it was supposed to be, there was little you could do not to hear an occasional, satisfied grunt, not to feel a certain amount of relief as the pressure youâd learned to ignore began to dissipate. His teeth grazed against your skin, and reflexively, your hand found the back of his head, nails biting into his scalp. Rather than pull away, Suguru seemed to purr â the noise deep and throaty, reverberating against you as he leaned that much closer, as he shifted and you felt something stiff press into your thigh. Donât think about it, you forced yourself to chant in the back of your mind, trying to remember all the age-old coping mechanisms youâd used when you were with him, all the coping mechanisms youâd forgotten after realizing that they wouldnât work on someone as unpredictable as Satoru. You couldnât think about it. You couldnât put a name to it. You couldnât acknowledge that sucking on chest was in any way connected to the hard, pulsing cock pressing into yourâ
But you didnât have a choice. Suguru gasped, his breath hitching, and then he was drawing away from you, his forehead resting against your collarbone as a hand fell to the waistband of his jeans, freeing his cock â already stiff, already leaking into his palm. âI missed you.â Youâd lost track of how many times heâd repeated the same meaningless phrase, but this time, his voice shook, misery seeping out from each fractured syllable. You mightâve felt more pity, but any sympathy you mightâve been able to feel for him was quickly drowned out by the material of your skirt being gathered in handfuls at your waist, his cock finding its way between your plush thighs. His larger body kept yours in place as he rutted against you, his open mouth leaking drool and milk and all the other ungodly things you could imagine onto your chest. It was embarrassing, really â just how tightly you kept your eyes shut, like a child walking through their first haunted house. Like all the bad things in the world would go away just because you couldnât see them. âFor weeks, I couldnâtâI didnât know where you were, I thoughtââ
His form jolted against yours. You felt it â a sudden, liquid heat against your thighs, a sudden tension where Suguruâs chest pressed into yours â at the same time you felt the first tear fall, searing your skin where it made contact. There was another, then yet another, before you finally realized what was happening.
Suguru was crying.
Huh.
Heâd never done that, before.
Finally, you forced yourself to open your eyes. Rather than attempting to look at Suguru, to see if his shoulders were shaking as violently as it felt like they were, your gaze moved outward, first to the bay, then to the sky â as black as spilled ink, now that the last traces of light had faded. As black as Suguruâs eyes.
You carded your fingers through his hair as he cried silently into your shoulder, never making a sound. Minutes passed before he spoke again, but you let him be the one to break the silence. âI donât get it.â You hummed, and he went on. âI donât understand why you didnât try to leave him, too.â
âI mightâve, eventually. If Iâd had more time.â
âBut you didnât.â His blunt nails bit into your waist with enough force to sting, but you didnât say anything. âI donât understand why you didnât.â
You didnât try to answer.
~
Suguru stopped at a gas station to clean himself up. You stayed in the car, clutching Himari to your chest, attempting not to flinch as her tiny hands pulled at your hair and grabbed at your skirt â searching for something to do, to entertain herself with. The rest of the drive passed in relative silence. Suguru didnât try to make conversation, and even if youâd wanted to, you wouldnât know where to start.
Finally, Suguru turned down an unpaved backroad, and far too soon, you were in front of a house you recognized. The architecture was traditional, the design compact, but you could remember Suguru saying that he and the girls didnât need much. Later on, when he decided you shouldnât be allowed to wander any farther than his line of sight during your pregnancy, heâd played with the idea of a larger property â something that could accommodate a growing family. If heâd ever had any real plans, they mustâve been abandoned after you left.
âWeâre only stopping by,â Suguru explained, as he moved to step out. You didnât wait for him this time â shouldering the door open and pulling yourself to your feet before he could decide he needed to drag you out of the car himself. âThereâs a nursery attached to the master bedroom. The girls can look after Himari while weâre gone.â
Your breathing hitched, then stopped altogether.
The girls.
Youâd managed to forget youâd have to see them, tonight. Suguru wouldâve been enough to handle on his own.
You tried to take a step back, more out of reflex than anything, but your legs were unsteady, unreliable. You stumbled, but before you could so much as start to fall, Suguru was by your side, one hand on your arm and the other underneath Himari. He started to say something, but you were faster, louder. âIâI canât. Theyâll be soâI knew you wouldnât hurt them, but I shouldnât haveââ
âTheyâll be just fine.â He wasnât crying, anymore. Instead, he took on the inflection, the stature heâd worn when you first met him â when heâd been the level-headed priest and youâd been a distraught non-believe desperate for help. If you hadnât known better, if you couldnât still see the reddened skin around his eyes, you mightâve called his composure sadistic. âAnd theyâve been waiting for you all night. Wouldnât it be cruel to disappoint them now?â
It'd be crueler to make them face the woman whoâd married their father and abandoned them without a second thought, but you doubted Suguru would agree. He was already curling his arm around yours, already guiding you towards the rustic villa. Whatever daze was keeping you from losing your mind entirely mustâve worn-off sometime during the drive. It was all you could do to keep yourself on your feet as you edged closer, closer to the front door. You were walking down the unpaved driveway, then standing on the wooden porch, and then, Suguru was ushering you inside â taking Himari out of your arms as you passed over the threshold. You didnât try to resist. He wouldnât ask the girls to hurt her, not after how long heâd spent holding the idea of a new, adorably helpless little sister over their heads, and wherever he was going to do to you after this, you didnât want Himari involved. You didnât want to give him an excuse to use her against you.
Suguru moved further into the villa, but you froze in the entryway. You could already hear the little, rushing footsteps, already picture the betrayal in their eyes, the questions theyâd ask you and the answers you wouldnât be able to give them. Theyâd hate you. They had to already hate you. You abandoned them, and they would know you abandoned them, and they wouldâ
Two arms wrapping around your legs, the force of a smaller body crashing into yours. You glanced down and found Mimiko, clinging to your waist, her face buried in the material of your skirt. She wasnât crying, but you could see her shoulders shaking, feel her nails digging into your thigh through the thin fabric. Reflexively, you reached down, resting a hand on top of her head and moving to nudge her away gently, to see if she needed help, but she only clung to you that much tighter.
Nanako was there, too, but she hadnât latched onto you. Unlike her sister, she kept her distance, hands ringing the hem of her sweater as she stared pointedly at the floor. âGeto-sama told us what happened,â she explained, while Mimiko mumbled something incoherent and affirmative into your skirt. âHe said that sorcerer â the white-haired one â took you and Himari away.â There was a pause, a quick glance in your direction. âHe promised he wouldnât let it happen again.â
Her eyes met yours, and suddenly, her nervous posture, the measured distance left between you and her â it made sense. You recognize the light in her eyes, or rather, the lack therefore.
It was the same shadow her fatherâs eyes took on, when he looked at you.
Whatever lie heâd told them, Nanako clearly didnât believe it. Mimiko â sweet and loyal and prone to holding onto the things she loved like there was someone could come and take them away at any time â wouldâve believed Suguru if he told her that world ended every time she closed her eyes, but Nanako was more pragmatic. She knew something was wrong. You doubted she would speak to you at all if she knew just how wrong, but still.
Swallowing your guilt, you lowered yourself to one knee and hugged Mimiko properly, squeezing her for one beat, then another, before letting her go entirely. Nanako was next. For all her reservations, she was running towards you as soon as you opened your arms to her, crashing into your chest and clinging to you twice as tightly as her sister had. âIâm sure he wonât,â you mumbled into her hair. And then, pulling back, âI know I was gone for a while, but itâs alright. The sorcerer Geto-sama told you about â he just wanted a little advice. He had two children he was raising all on his own, just like Geto. He heard all about how wonderful you two are, and wanted to know if I could stay and show him how to bring up the best kids in the world.â A kiss on either forehead, a thumb drawn over Mimikoâs cheeks to wipe away the tears she was frantically (and unsuccessfully) attempting to paw away on her own. âBut, although I was very flattered, I told him that I had to go home. I knew you two would be fine, of course, but letâs face it â Geto wouldnât last a day without me.â
It was your turn to pause, now, to lower your voice into something secretive. Mimiko was still sniffling, still determined to keep her face buried in her hands or your shoulder, but you made sure to meet Nanakoâs eyes, to sound as sincere as you could â even if complete honesty was beyond you, at the moment. âDonât tell Geto, but I missed you two most of all.â
Nanako looked like she wanted to say something. She almost did, too â tensing, opening her mouth, but she shut it again just as quickly, her eyes falling back to the ground in a sharp, violently narrow glare.
The pain was instant and beyond words. You wanted to pull her and Mimiko close again, to squeeze them tight and promise you wouldnât leave them, not again, to apologize when youâd inevitably have to for the sake of a sister you hadnât given them time to love. You wanted toâ
You heard Suguruâs footsteps, felt his hand on your shoulder, and every thought you mightâve had that wasnât devoted to your daughterâs well-being was gone.
Rather than embracing the girls, you drew back from them. Suguru pulled you gently to your feet, his hand falling from your shoulder to your elbow before wrapping around your wrist. âKeep an eye on your sister.â You could only be thankful there was still an ounce of warmth in his voice, as he addressed the girls. â(Y/n) and I have one more errand to run. Weâre trusting you two to look after her, until we come back.â
You mightâve added something, made sure they both knew that you really had missed them, but Suguru was already drawing you towards the door â still ajar. The last thing you saw was Nanako taking Mimiko by the wrist before the door was slammed shut, and you were left entirely alone with Suguru.
~
Of all the places you expected him to take you, his temple hadnât made the list.
His followers mustâve been sent away for the night, and the propertyâs attendants either dismissed or told to stay in their dorms. Every window was dark and shuttered, the gates locked and the doors bared. As you followed Suguru across the desolate courtyard and into the main shrine, you tried to think of places you wouldâve wanted to be taken to, but came up empty. Part of you had been expecting the cheap, equally lifeless chain motels heâd shown a fondness for during your pregnancy, or worse, the hotel where youâd spent your first night together. Another, larger, quieter part had been able to imagine him driving into the deepest, darkest forest he could find and having his monstrous spirits tear you to shreds before you could so much as scream.
His ultimate destination was far from shocking, and yet, you still felt your heart drop into your stomach as he led you into his darkened sanctuary. As if in preparation, two tapered candles had been left burning in metal trays on either side of the screen door, and Suguru took one up as he passed by. You were left to linger in the doorway as, with a surprising meticulousness, he lit the candles scattered throughout the sanctuary, casting the open space in an ebbing golden glow. When he was finished, he collapsed onto his raised dais â perched on its edge, rather than laid across it. He almost looked out of place, without his usual costume, his usual posture. He almost looked his age.
You didnât move. Running seemed impossible, but so did breaking the silence, doing anything to make yourself an active participant in Suguruâs bizarre ritual rather than a passive observer, a prop to be moved from place to place with little thought as to where you might want to be. A moment passed in silence, then another. Finally, he cracked. âSit down.â
You didnât move. âAre you going to kill me?â
He didnât react. âAll I asked you to do was sit down, love.â
âAre you going to kill Himari?â
He flinched into himself, going crooked. Something like hurt passed across his expression, as genuine as it was hypocritical.
He didnât respond, but either out of pity or remorse or a lack of anything else to do, you found yourself closing the gap between you and him, setting yourself down on the edge of his platform. Immediately, his head fell onto your shoulder, his hand to your thigh, as if he was afraid youâd leave him again if he didnât cling to you. ââŠI thought about breaking your legs,â he confessed, without prompting. âI was angry, when I realized you hadnât been taken by force. I thought Iâd be able to do it in Satoruâs apartment, leave enough blood to make him think Iâd killed you, butââ There was a pause, a slow shake of his head. âI donât know. I guess I waited too long, lost the nerve or something.â
âIâm glad you didnât.â And then, when he shifted curiously beside you, âIt wouldâve scared the girls. Theyâre already having such a hard time.â
At that, Suguru melted entirely against you. There was an airy laugh, a small sigh, and you felt his hand on your hip, his thumb drawing loose patterns into your side. âSo considerate,â he muttered, nuzzling into the dip of your shoulder. âMaybe, one day, youâll care about me like that, too.â
A knot formed in the back of your throat. It wasnât that you didnât care for him â or, that you hadnât, before he made it clear that the ways you were capable of caring for him werenât enough. If you hadnât felt anything for him, none of this wouldâve ever happened. If heâd been satisfied to let you feel the same way about him that you felt about his daughters, it would never have gotten this bad. If youâd just laid back and let him fuck you the first time heâd asked, he wouldâve lost interest in you months ago. You almost said so, too, tensed and opened your mouth and everything, but Suguru was moving before you had the chance to spit something out, his mouth crashing into yours with all the care and all the tenderness of a blunt object shattering bone. His teeth cut into your bottom lip, his body pressing into yours with enough force to throw you off balance, but his arms were already around your waist, keeping you upright. It was less that he slid off of the dais and more that he collapsed â dropping onto his knees at your feet, as little difference as it made in terms of height. He never let you stray very far, but tonight, he seemed determined never to leave more than a hairâs width of space between your body and his. His lips fell from your mouth to your neck, his hands finding their way to your hips. One darted for your neckline, but dropped back to your waist just as suddenly â all ten fingers soon burrowed into the plush of your waist.
âYour dress.â He wasnât panting, wasnât grinning, wasnât laughing. His voice reverberated dully against the base of your throat, his pointed canines scraping over your skin as he spoke. âTake it off.â
You swallowed. Normally, he preferred to undress and re-dress you himself. Youâd been scolded more than once for thinking you had any right to decide what you wore without his loving input, and when pressed, he claimed it was a show of love; proof of his dedication, his devotion.
This wasnât about love, though, or dedication, or any other flowery word heâd ever used with you.
This was about control.
Your hands shook as you raised them to the back of your dress, finding the row of corset-type strings keeping the loose material in place. You fumbled with the knot for seconds, but Suguru was patient, willing to wait until the bodice fell away from your chest entirely, pooling at your midriff. You werenât wearing a bra (again, an extremely difficult habit not to get into with a newborn at home), and one of Suguruâs hands came up, a scarred palm cupping your breast with enough force to bruise. You remembered, dimly, the time heâd spent pulled over by the side of the road earlier that day, but the memory was foggy, already so far away. You wouldnât have been surprised if all of this seemed like one hazy, distant dream by tomorrow morning.
He detached from you suddenly, pulling away and kneeling on the sanctuary floor. Rather than relief, you only felt the world distort more violently around you; your pulse slowing and your vision burning as you clumsily pushed yourself to your feet, allowing your dress to fall away entirely. You moved to sit back down, but Suguru caught you before you could â his fist wrapping around your ankle, then skirting upward, settling gingerly against your thigh as his dark, soulless eyes raked over you. His stare caught on your panties, and his expression darkened. âIâm going to kill him.â
You didnât have to ask what he meant. The pair had been Satoruâs pick; not quite a gift, but something given to you, regardless. They matched his aesthetics â needlessly detailed, smothered in lace, cast a shade of light blue so pale, it bordered on ivory. With how expensive Satoruâs tastes tended to run, you were sure the set had cost a fortune, but the priceless fabric gave away without protest as Suguru slipped two fingers under the waistband and tore. The ruined article fell away before you could so much as process that heâd moved.
Suguruâs impressive patience waned quickly. In the same motion, he pushed himself to his feet and took you into his arms, carrying you against his chest onto the dais, then to the altar pressed against the far wall. The scrolls laid across it were sent to floor with a single movement of his arm, and in the blink of an eye, you were laid across the polished wood, Suguru on his knees between your open legs. Your mouth opened, but there was no time to protest, to call out before his face was buried between his thighs, tongue lapping over the length of your slit. Still, you grit your teeth, bracing yourself to sit up, to tell him toâ
Oh.
He'd gotten his tongue pierced, sometime after you left.
He was shameless. A rounded, jeweled stud dragged over your pussy, circling your clit with no pattern or pace, no intention other than to taste you. Never content to leave you to your own devices, he kept his hands wrapped around your hips, pinning you to the surface of the altar as he tried to all-but swallow you whole. It was messy, and overzealous, and worst of all, it was good. It was a matter of seconds before a mixture of spit and arousal stained the inside of your thighs and dripped from his chin, less than a full minute before you had to concentrate just to keep yourself from squirming underneath him. Not that it wouldâve mattered, if you had. Suguru had always been playful in bed, content to milk reactions out of you with measured precision and careful vigilance, but that had been when you at least attempted to present yourself as willing. Right now, anything you mightâve felt seemed secondary to Suguruâs pleasure; satisfied groans soon joining the slick, wet noise ricocheting off the walls of his sanctuary. You dug your teeth into your bottom lip, crossed your arms over your face, but neither distraction helped to stifle the feeling of his lips latching onto your clit, suckling on it with all the care and all the delicacy of a butcherâs knife cutting into lifeless flesh. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes by the time he pulled away, but the pressure was immediately replaced by the bridge of his nose grinding harshly against the bundle of nerves, his tongue slipping past your entrance to curl against the most vulnerable parts of your cunt.
He let out another reverberating moan, and reflexively, your hand shot to the back of his head, your fingers soon tangled in his dark hair. One of his hands fell from your waist, and for a moment, you thought he was moving to pry away yours, that he didnât want you touching him. But, fortunately or otherwise, his attention wasnât on you. Instead, he reached for the elastic band holding his hair in place, pulling it out with enough force to snap the cheap plastic. You didnât realize what he was trying to do until you felt him lean into your palm, his eyes fluttering shut as he melted into the semblance of your touch.
If youâd been capable of feeling anything more towards Suguru than you already did, you mightâve found the sight pitiful.
At the moment, though, you werenât in a place to be quite so sentimental. It was all you could do to knot his hair around your fingers as you felt tight and hot form in your core, as your thighs threatened to snap shut around his head. You bit into the inside of your check with enough force to draw blood as Suguru moaned shamelessly, as he dragged you that much closer. It was too easy to forget to care whether or not heâd enjoyed it, too reflexive to gather his hair in your first and pull, to buck involuntarily into his mouth, toâ
Suguru drew back suddenly, pushing himself to his feet. Thankfully, you caught yourself before you could feel disappointment, and after a few shallow breaths, found the strength to follow his stare away from you and towards the sanctuary door. Instantly, your heart stopped beating, the blood running cold in your veins.
Satoru stood in the doorway, cast in shadow save for his bright, piercing eyes. One of his hands was still wrapped around the doorframe, while the other hung limp at his side, cupping a small, pulsing ball ofâŠÂ light?
You didnât have time to think about it. Suguru acted swiftly â pulling you into his arms and onto his lap, seating himself on the altar where youâd previously laid. âDrop it,â he said, his tone cold, cutting, not unlike an owner talking to his disobedient pet. Heâd been short with you all night, but you couldnât say heâd ever spoken to you quite like that. âBefore you do something youâll regret.â
The light dimmed before disappearing entirely, but Satoru didnât move. He didnât do anything, but you could feel it â a drop in the sanctuaryâs temperature, a change in the air pressure, something deep and intrinsic that you didnât want to be a part of. Reflexively, you tried to stand, to move, but Suguru held you tight, an arm barred over your midriff.
Despite everything, Satoru was the first to break the silence, albeit without doing anything to make that intangible tension any more bearable. âI should kill you.â
âYou should.â Suguruâs fingertips dug into your side. âThose are your orders, arenât they? Or are you going to put off delivering my head to the higher-ups for another three years?â
Whatever he was talking about, Satoru didnât seem interested in acknowledging it. âYou took my girls.â
âYou fucked my wife.â
At that, something seemed to break. Suguruâs chest pressed into your back as Satoruâs eyes shut, as he sucked in a harsh breath and broke out into a fanged grin, the sharpest youâd ever seen him wear. âYeah. Yeah, I did.â He took a step forward, all hostility gone in favor of a sort of manic, unpredictable buzz. You didnât know whether to be relieved that there was a slightly diminished chance youâd be caught in the middle of their fight to the death or terrified at the thought that they might want to do anything but tear out each othersâ throats. âI fucked her after she left you. Bet you canât stand it â knowing youâre not the only one who gets to run away.â
Suguru, for all his faults, didnât flinch. Heâd always had an even-temper at the worst of time. âWhat do you want, âtoru?â
Satoruâs stare fell away from Suguru and onto you. His expression softened, taking on an almost apologetic lilt. Almost, but not quite.
âNot much,â he admitted, with a shrug. Even from a distance, even in the dark, you could tell his nonchalance was forced. âJust to say goodbye, make sure my pretty girlâs gonna be taken care of. Gotta wrap up loose ends, nâ all that.â
Suguru, for his part, seemed far from convinced. His grip didnât loosen; if anything, he only held you closer. âAnd why should I let you?â
âBecause I love her?â And then, with another step toward the altar, âBecause you know I could wipe this building off the face of the planet, if I wanted to.â Â
Pragmatic as he was, Suguru seemed to consider it. The hand over your side flexed, a chin settling against the dip of your shoulder, and beneath you, his stiff cock pressed into your ass â either unaffected or worse, fueled on by Satoruâs interruption. You were still attempting not to dwell on the implications when Suguru responded, level-headed as always.
âIf you try anything, Iâll kill the baby.â
The second before a car crash, the spark where two wires failed to connect. For the longest time, you couldnât seem to process what heâd said or how it couldâve been so gut-wrenchingly terrible. Rather than pull away, you flattened yourself against him, glancing over your shoulder. You opened your mouth, but the ability to speak was suddenly beyond you, set deliberately out of your reach. He didnât mean it. He couldnât mean it, and yet, his expression was stoic, unchanging, the pinnacle of neutrality. There was no laugh from Satoru either, forced or otherwise. Still, he kept up his smile. As if Suguru hadnât said anything of consequence. As if either of them had any right to so much as touch your daughter.
Satoru didnât respond to the threat, nor did Suguru urge him to. Almost mechanically, Suguruâs arm fell away from your midriff, and with little more than a nudge to the back of your shoulder, you were on your feet, vulnerable and shaking on the center of the raised dais. You could still feel a mix of slick and saliva coating the inside of your thighs, and you had to swallow the urge to make a grab for your clothes, to put yourself through the humiliation of being forced to strip twice in one night.
 Thankfully, tragically, you were liberated from any illusion of free choice swiftly. Without protest from Suguru, Satoru stepped onto the dais and took you by the hand, either overlooking or failing to acknowledge the panic in your eyes in favor of intertwining his fingers with yours and squeezing gently, as if you could still believe he genuinely wanted to comfort you. Rather than pulling you into his arms, dragging you down to the floor, he looked to Suguru, cocking his head to the side. âGet up.â
Suguruâs lips quirked downward, but he obeyed, pushing himself to his feet. âHow blasphemous.â
Now, he pulled you off of your feet. In a moment, you were in his arms, and the next, you were perched on the altar, your back pressed against the wall and your legs spread around Satoruâs waist. âBlasphemous,â Satoru echoed, his voice low but plainly audible in the silence of the sanctuary. âwould be fucking the most beautiful woman in the world on the ground. Thatâs why Iâm her favorite â âcause Iâm so considerate.â
No part of you trusted Suguru. No part of you preferred Suguru to Satoru, or the other way around. No part of you thought that, unless your life or his pride was threatened, heâd ever lift a finger to help you, but you found yourself glancing toward him out of the corner of your eye, doing your best to silently communicate that you needed to get out of here. Instead of sympathy, jealousy, you only found an idle smirk, a glassy sheen over his eyes that you could only imagine youâd mirrored for most of the day. âYouâre not the one sheâs married to, idiot.â
There was a dip, a surprisingly fleeting kiss to your lips, then your jaw, then your throat. âBut she would get with me if you were out of the picture, right?â The question was punctuated with a nip to your collarbone, a hand dropped low enough to cup your pussy. The heel of his palm ground into your clit as two fingers pushed into your soaked cunt, spreading apart and scissoring you open. You tried to bow your head, to keep your eyes closed and your mouth shut, but you were still sensitive from your ruined climax, still so painfully exposed, and there was nothing you could do to bite back the cracked whines and pitiful mewls that slipped through your pursed lips. It was far from verbal confirmation, but Satoru hummed, grinned against your chest as if youâd sung his praises. âIâd get you a nicer ring, nicer house, nicer honeymoon. Always make sure youâre good nâ taken care of while Suguruâs busy playing god.â
Suguru huffed, and Satoru fell into a steady pace, adding a third digit as he carelessly fucked his fingers into your cunt. You didnât hear him move, but before you could brace yourself, Suguru was at your side, leaning onto the altar to cup your face and trace over your jaw with the pad of his thumb. âI take care of you, donât I?â You opened your mouth reflexively, ready to tell him that you were sorry, that you didnât want him to touch you, that you wanted this to stop, but he was faster than you, more malicious. His thumb was forced past your lips before you could make a sound, pressed against the flat of your tongue with just enough force for your jaw to ache in protest. âI canât blame Satoru for not being able to see that, though. Not when you treat me so cruelly.â
Cruelly. Youâd never been cruel â at least, no crueler than you absolutely needed to be to survive. You felt pins and needles prick at the corners of your eyes before you noticed your vision blurring, before tears were streaming down either side of your face in boiling tracks. Satoru purred in sympathy, falling low and nuzzling into the tender spot at the base of your throat, flicking his wrist and burying himself inside of you to the knuckle. âYou donât have to worry, I know heâs the mean one.â
He was whispering, but that didnât matter. He was too close, too awful for each word not to be absolutely deafening, for each little movement of his hand not to leave your nails scraping against the smooth wood of the altar, searching for purchase you wouldnât find. Time was moving too quickly, it had been since you arrived at the temple. You couldnât scream, couldnât pull away, couldnât breathe before Satoru pressed an open-mouthed kiss into the side of your neck and you were coming undone around his fingers, your thighs locking around his arm and keeping his digits inside of you until you could remember how to suck in a gasping inhale, until the last of the aftershocks faded and you could bring yourself to open your eyes. It wasnât until the warmth of Satoruâs mouth fell away from your neck that you noticed the strange, copper tinge spread over your tongue, that you registered the absence of Suguruâs hand against your jaw. When you thought to look in his direction, he was evaluating his own hand. A thin, red line formed a dotted ring around the base of his thumb. You mustâve bitten down, at some point.
You mustâve hurt him.
Fear drowned out any satisfaction there mightâve been. He mentioned deciding against breaking your legs, earlier; was there any chance heâd change his mind? Would Satoru be able to stop him, if he tried to hurt you? Would Satoru even want to stop him? Himari was still alone, still in danger, and you wouldnât be able to get to her if you couldnât walk. You wouldnât be able to stop Suguru fromâ
Satoru reached out, his hand curling around Suguruâs wrist and dragging it down to his height. With Satoruâs guidance, Suguruâs thumb came to rest against his bottom lip, then slipped into Satoruâs mouth entirely, his lips soon sealed around its base. There was a second or two of stillness, a swallowing-type noise too loud to ignore despite your best attempts not to hear it, and then, Suguru was pulling away and Satoruâs lips were crashing into yours.
It was strange for Suguru to be so clumsy, but you couldnât bring yourself to be as surprised by Satoruâs lack of polish. It was all you could do to choke back a renewed sob as his mouth moved against yours, as his pointed teeth ghosted over your lips and grazed the underside of your tongue. He was all instinct, no logic, and when you tried to straighten, to leave enough room between you and him to catch your breath, he only seemed to want you closer. His hands were on your waist, then your arms, then your chest, never satisfied unless he could dig his claws into the most tender parts of you, and this time, when his canines grazed over your lips, he wasnât satisfied to leave your connection at contact alone. He let out a shameless moan as he lapped at the puncture wound, warm blood leaking down your chin and pooling on your chest where it pressed into his. Again, you looked to Suguru for help, and again, you immediately wished you hadnât bothered.
He wasnât perched on the altar, anymore. No â heâd shifted, slinked, positioned himself behind Satoru where he was bent at the waist. He caught your eye as his arms snaked around Satoruâs midriff, as Satoru arched his back to better take advantage of the new contact. There was the distant, muffled sound of fabric rustling, a keening whine from Satoru, and then, Suguruâs hand was curled around Satoruâs stiff, leaking cock â pumping over the shaft while his dark eyes burned holes into yours. âGet it over with,â he muttered, the bitter sterility of his tone a sharp juxtaposition to the grin creeping across his expression. âBefore I remember why I want you dead.â
Satoru didnât have to be coaxed into compliance. No, he let himself be eased into place, let Suguru slot himself against his back as he carefully aligned Satoruâs flushed tip to your entrance. Even after heâd let go, his hands finding the edge of the altar on either side of you, Satoru failed to move on his own. You could feel him drifting from your lips to your throat, then lower â to the crook of your neck, a spot Suguruâd always favored. Vaguely, you were aware of his lips moving against your skin, of warm breath fanning over your chest and leaving frost wherever itâd touched. His voice was muffled by proximity, but whether or not you could hear him didnât really matter. You wouldâve recognized those three little words from a thousand miles away.
âI love you.â
If youâd been able to laugh, you wouldâve.
At least Satoru didnât expect you to say it back.
Suguru mustâve missed it â that, or he was beyond the point of caring. His teeth sunk into the nape of Satoruâs neck, and then, something hot and piercing was inside of you.
This time, you couldnât stop yourself from crying out. A fractured moan tumbled past your lips as Satoru immediately fell into a brutal pace; all that teasing tenderness gone the moment your pussy was wrapped around his cock. Suguru didnât pull away, but he didnât help, either; straightening his back and gazing down at you with that same foggy, absent, pleased expression. It took you a moment to put a name to it; lovestruck, all glassy eyes and hollow smiles, any anger hidden behind a thick curtain of glazed-over satisfaction. Heâd never looked away from you, but when you met his eyes, he seemed to soften even further, his shoulders dropping as he brought a hand to the small of Suguruâs back, spurring him on. âHeâs always been this bad.â  Suguru let out a keening whine into your shoulder, and Suguru chuckled airily. âLike a dog in heat. Youâd think be as desperate as one, too, but apparently, his standards are too high for him to do anything but act like a whore.â
You couldnât take it â the way Satoruâs hips crashed into yours, how his pubic bone ground against your clit, the pure venom interlaced with Suguruâs velvet-soft tone. You knew that it was useless, childish, but you couldnât swallow down the cracked sob that rose up from somewhere deep and unprotected in your chest, couldnât hold back the tears now flowing freely down your cheeks. Suguruâs smile widened, his sharpened teeth catching the dull candlelight, but Satoru was kind enough not to be so observant. His attention was dedicated entirely to fucking into you as quickly and as deeply as possible; his cock never less than half buried. You felt him twitch, and before you could hold yourself back, your hands were on his back, your nails embedded in pale skin and tearing upward every time he bottomed out and sent a new type of agony coursing through your system. âStop, stop, I canâtââ
âYou can.â Clipped, concise, dripping with stone-cold affection. Youâd be surprised if you ever heard any warmth in Suguruâs voice again. âThat is, unless youâd like to break two hearts on the same night.â
Your mouth was still open, but you couldnât answer. Satoru groaned as he rutted into you, his pace growing that much more erratic, his hips grinding into yours. He pulled you into another deep, copper-tinged kiss as he pressed his body flush to yours, as you felt something thick and hot and soul-crushingly familiar flood into you. It mightâve been the sensitivity, or the overstimulation, or the herbal stench of incense left to burn for a minute too long finally taking its toll â it didnât really matter, either way. No explanation couldâve dampened the feeling of your cunt clenching tight around him, couldâve prevented the utter desolation of cumming on Satoruâs cock.
It seemed to go on for the longest time â second after second of thoughtless, helpless pleasure, century after century of Satoru against you, edging on your climax with the occasional sharp movement from his hips, a hasty kiss pressed into the corner of your jaw. Finally, after a small eternity, the last of the aftershocks faded, unwanted bliss fading into a slow, pulsing ache settled deep into the deepest pit of your chest. You felt Satoru shift; not pulling away, but lifting himself up, bringing his mouth to the shell of your ear. âI love you,â he said, again, and then, more quietly, âIâm sorry.â
You wanted to say something, to call him a liar, to spit out every venomous and vitriolic and warranted thing you could ever say to either of them, but it was already too late. Something vital slid out of place, a poor signal finally losing connection entirely, and then, everything went dark.
~
Nine months later, youâd find yourself in Suguruâs temple again, albeit not his sanctuary. A brown-haired woman in a lab coat and several female attendants swarmed around you, pressing damp cloths to your forehead and constantly rearranging the thick quilts laid over your limp body. Dried tears formed defined tracks down your cheeks, and every part of you screamed for rest, for escape, for a quick and merciful death. It was all you could do to suck in a shuddering breath, to remind yourself that there were more important things in the world than your own well-being. Sleep could wait. This couldnât.
Slowly, you managed to turn your head towards Suguru, standing at your bedside just as he had for the past six hours. Your vision was distorted, dimmed around the edges, but it wouldâve been impossible to miss the small, white bundle in his arms, already beginning to move. You could practically taste the relief, only slightly soured by your own exhaustion. Loving Himari had been a miracle. It wouldâve been a lie to say that you hadnât expected yourself to be more callous, the second time part of you was ripped away and molded into the shape of a man you hated.
Your eyes flickered to Suguruâs expression, to those impossibly dark eyes, and instantly, your relief was replaced by pure, unadulterated dread. A smile played at the corner of his mouth, softened and careless, but⊠Oh, god.
Youâd never seen so much death in his eyes.
âSuguru.â You hadnât meant to say anything, and yet, your voice was clear â a little hoarse, but far stronger than you felt. Never looking away from the bundle, he hummed, and you went on. âCan I seeâŠ?â
âHim,â Suguru filled in, bouncing your newborn â your son, gently. âA healthy baby boy. Itâs a shame, really â I chose names with another girl in-mind.â
Thankfully, he didnât make you ask again. With no small amount of care, the bundle was placed gently onto your chest, Suguruâs hand remaining on your shoulder â as if only waiting for your limited strength to give out. It took you a long moment to brush the swaddling sheets to the swaddling blanket aside, little hands immediately reaching up to bat against your own, and another to register what you were looking at. It wasnât hard to see why Suguru was so angry.
You stared down at your son, and eyes more blue than the clearest, brightest sky stared back at you.
Title: Going Live.
Pairing: Yandere!Nanami x Reader (JJK)
Word Count: 7.6k.
TW: Non/Con, Fem!Reader, Camgirl!Reader, Kidnapping, Physical Intimidation, Long-Term Stalking, Obsessive Behavior, Delusional Behavior, Slight Exhibitionism, and Panic Attacks + Disassociation. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.
You were a lot of things to Nanami Kento â his world, his light, his love â but above all else, you were the reason he looked forward to getting home.
Calling it âinfatuationâ wouldâve been a disservice to the depth of his feelings for you. Itâd been love at first sight; instant and wholehearted, a shackle snapped shut around his neck that he had no will or desire to escape. His eyes were on his watch as soon as he crossed the threshold, his coat shrugged off and abandoned along with his tie in the doorway. He didnât bother turning on lights or taking off his shoes, doing anything to make his empty apartment seem more lived-in, his focus solely dedicated to reaching his home office with as few disruptions as was possible, with Gojo and the higher-ups still attempting to contact him about the curse heâd finished exorcising less than an hour prior. They could wait. You wouldnât.
He was smiling by the time he collapsed into the leather-cushioned chair, his laptop still on his desk from the night before â the last time he got to see you. The motions were automatic, practiced to the point of reflexivity. One hand glided over the keyboard while the other found his phone, silencing it in the same motion as he tossed it haphazardly onto the desk, out of his view. He checked his watch one more time; 6:59. Good. He was early.
His grin brightened, as did his laptop. Your stream flickered to life a second later and with it, your smiling face. The relief was instant, pure warmth accompanying it. The bittersweet tinge â as subtle as it was prodding â came only a moment later, but Nanami did his best to ignore it.
You were the sole reason Nanami Kento looked forward to getting home. The center of his world, the sole light in his otherwise bleak life. The person he loved more than anything, more than everything.
It was only a shame, then, that you had no idea he existed.
One of his favorite things about you had always been your meticulousness. For tonightâs show, you were splayed out across the foot of a queen-sized bed, surrounded by pastel pink satin sheets and a fleece comforter of the same shade, a matching dormant hitachi vibrator (Nanamiâs favorite and, guessing from how often it made an appearance in your shows, yours too) nestled between your thighs. Your outfit was aesthetically pleasing â a set of lacey, baby blue lingerie with white, knee socks â but paired with your set up, casual enough to give the impression that you hadnât realized the camera you were posing in front of was actually on, as if you werenât entirely prepared to be seen by a thousand or so strangers just yet. The fact that you didnât start talking right away, only humming as you idly toyed with your hair, only added to the nonchalance of it all. You would make a good actress, if you ever decided to pursue something more, for lack of a more applicable phrase, legitimate.
Nanamiâs attention drifted from you to your chat, slowly starting to fill with impatient viewers. Despite himself, he felt his absentminded smile waver, an irk of irritation momentarily tainting his bliss. He knew you werenât entirely real, that he didnât have any right to be possessive over a performer, but he loved you. It wouldâve been difficult for anyone to watch someone they loved be exposed to so many prying eyes.
user34333: fuck sheâs hot
hotbox420: looking good y/n!!!
lostandconfused: why does she still have her clothes on?
 The only silver lining was how oblivious you seemed to it. Another minute passed before you straightened, yawning slightly as you pushed yourself up, legs hanging over the foot of your bed. âWelcome home,â you started, with a quick stretch and a playful wave towards the camera. âEveryoneâs already put the kids to bed, right? Iâve got a very special surprise I want to bring out a little later, so nobodyâs allowed to leave early.â
Your tone was light, melodic, saccharine. Already, Nanami could feel his cock beginning to harden against his thigh, straining at the material of his pants. You were always mobile during your shows, prone to flitting from one position to another, but tonight, you almost seemed antsy as you pulled your legs back onto the mattress, tucking your knees underneath you and bowing your head, your neutral smile taking on a shy undertone. âIâve been looking forward to this all day,â you admitted, speaking quickly enough for the words to blend together. Then, with more composure, âWho wants to get us started?â
Nanamiâs hand was already on his keyboard, waiting for your cue. Somehow, he was still too late.
blueeyeswhitedragon sent 150 credits!
blueeyeswhitedragon: Bra first, pretty please.
You giggled as you raised your hands, leaning forward to give the camera a better view of your chest as you undid the clasp at the nape of your neck. Nanamiâs breath hitched as the thin fabric fell away, revealing the soft curves of your breasts and your pretty, perfect nipples â already hard, already enough to make saliva pool underneath his tongue. The lower clasp was next, undone with more effort and more bouncing than what seemed absolutely necessary, but Nanami couldnât complain, not when he was struggling to undo the fly of his dress pants without ever looking away from you. There was another giggle as the article fell away entirely, then a third as you cupped your chest with both hands, groping gently. âI used to be so shy about taking my top off on cameraâŠâ You trailed off, batting your eyes. âBut, you guys think Iâm pretty, right?â
Your requested affirmations flooded the chat in an instant. Nanami grinned, slumping back in his chair. He could compliment any part of you earnestly, but aside from donations, he rarely let himself participate in your chat. Speaking to you so openly, being one of a dozen people whose username youâd glance over in a second â that wasnât what he wanted. Anonymous adoration wasnât the shape his affection took.
Eventually, you collapsed back onto your bed. âOkay, okay, thatâs enough,â you went on, as Nanami wrapped a fist around the base of his cock. âWhat next?â
There was another offer â 300 credits for your panties, 400 if you took them off with your back to the camera. You obliged, bent at the waist, inching the silken fabric down your thighs at an almost sadistic pace. After you finished, you seemed ready to move onto the main show, but another donation cropped up in your chat.
user34232 sent 75 credits!
user34232: for the socks pls
That, as far as Nanami could tell, seemed to catch you genuinely off-guard. He could see you blushing as you leaned towards the camera â or, he supposed, the laptop you had positioned underneath it, as if youâd misread something. ââŠmy socks?â
Nanami stifled a grown, tightening his hold. With his free hand, he reached for the keyboard,
n. kento sent 200 credits!
n. kento: Donât take them off.
You played your part perfectly, sighing as you let your head lull to the side. All it took was you batting your eye lashes while letting out the sweetest murmur of âWell, I donât know if thatâs fair, butâŠâ for your chat to dissolve into a bidding war, donations ranging from five credits to five hundred. If you were making any earnest attempt to keep track of which side was winning, you clearly had no motivation to call it too early on â pulling your legs onto your bed and kicking your feet out playfully towards the camera. âSome of you guys ask for such weird stuff,â you went on, rolling your left ankle. âIf someone doesnât tell me what to do soon, I think Iâm just going to have to change into another outfit.â
Nanami let out a breath of a chuckle, only half aware he was typing.
n. kento sent 1,750 credits!
n. kento: You look beautiful. Keep them on.
You laughed, and this time, Nanami chose to believe it was sincere. âI get it! Weâll move on.â You were already leaning back, rolling onto your stomach, giving your viewers a perfect view of your ass as you reached for something off-screen. âNormally Iâd ask for a suggestion,â you said, as you brought what youâd retrieved back into frame â a pale pink rabbit vibrator, the penetrative half of the forked wand ribbed. âBut I have something Iâm kind of looking forward to. I promise, Iâll try to get past the boring stuff quickly.â
You thought too little of yourself. Arousal drooled from Nanamiâs flushed tip as you positioned yourself on the edge of the mattress, legs spread wide and slick, glistening pussy fully on display. You were already wet, but he knew you would be. It was something you joked about often â how sensitive you were, how something as minor as a wet dream would have you soaking through your panties. Normally, he wouldâve figured you were just playing it up for the sake of your viewers, but it was hard to deny the evidence in front of him.
A whimper slipped past your parted lips as you eased the head of the toy past your entrance, stretching yourself out on its bulbed tip. Now, now, he started to move his hand, pumping his fist over the length of his shaft in short, slow strokes, matching your tempo as you rocked your toy into your pussy. A dull hum fills the room as your thumb finds the switch built into the handleâs underside, and your expression immediately goes from dazed to pained, your tongue peaking out from between your lips and your eyes fluttering shut as your hips bucked against the vibrator. âItâIt feelsââ Your thighs threaten to twitch shut, but you hold them open, determined to give your audience the best possible view of your pussy clenching around your toy. âI reallyâI wanna get some bondage gear soon, so that I canââ
Whatever you mightâve said was replaced by a bubbling moan, and just like that, Nanami was fucking his fist without restraint. He knew how pathetic it was, but it wouldâve been impossible not to imagine it was his cock sinking into your dripping cunt rather than an inanimate toy, not to wish it was your pussy clamping down around his length rather than his own fist. He wondered what you smelled like, if you wore perfume, what it would be like to have his face buried between your thighs. He was aware, vaguely, that your chat was the most active itâd been all night, people trying to catch your attention with donations and tips and compliments, but they didnât matter. They werenât watching you, not really, not the same way Nanami was. He knew you, well enough to know that you couldnât think once something had been stuffed inside of your cunt. He loved you, enough to wish he was the one making your mind go so euphorically blank.
There was more moaning, more failed attempts to speak, but you didnât let yourself cum. You were visibly trembling by the time you switched the toy off, and it took agonizing seconds to ease the wand out of your disappointed pussy â seconds Nanami watched with rapt devotion. More out of sympathy than anything else, he lets go of his cock entirely, gritting his teeth and attempting to ignore the pulsing ache forming in the pit of his stomach. What was next was better. What was next was worth waiting for.
You took a few panting breaths, your voice still airy by the time you managed to speak. âI have aââ You paused, grinned. Nanami smiled too. âI have a surprise for all of you, tonight. I think I mentioned that already, butâ oh, right.â You perked up, playing excited. âWe have to move to the floor, for this next part.â
You slipped off-screen, and a second later, the camera shifted to follow you â falling onto a corner of your room less staged than your bed, but just as pristine. Abstract, pastel tapestries obscured the walls, but the dark floorboards were left bare. On one side, most of a dog kennel was visible, decorated with string lights and clearly meant for one of your more niche shows, and on the other, he could make out the bottom corner of a poster â not for anything kinky, or sensual, or in any way suggestive, but an underground band, a local band. You probably hadnât realized it was in the shot, let alone meant for it to be. You were usually more careful about giving away anything even remotely personal, but Nanami couldnât be mad.
After all, itâd been that poster thatâd let him find you.
He could still remember the first time he ever saw you â actually saw you, not through a screen, but in person. After he knew that you lived in the same city as him (the same district, even), itâd only taken a few more days to find your name, your age, your address. Still, he put off visiting you for weeks, telling himself that it didnât matter, that you wouldnât recognize him, that you wouldnât want to see him. And, in the end, you hadnât seen him at all â you hadnât needed to.
That night, heâd watched your show from the rooftop of the building opposite of yours, straining to see you through a bedroom window left carelessly open. Even now, the guilt was almost tangibly agonizing, the shame practically unbearable.
Almost as unbearable as the temptation to go back.
But, that part would come soon enough. You were on screen, again, holding something he recognized.
âI have some exciting news,â you chirped, as you kneeled on the floor, holding a pitch-black dildo, a suction cup attached to the base. Despite its color, Nanami could make out defined veins running down the silicone shaft, a noticeable girth to the base. A perfect mirror of the cock currently pulsing for attention in his lap.
He felt himself grinning, as you went on. âI got my first real fan gift!â You held up the toy to your cheek, like a child showing off their first stuffed animal, before planting it on the floor between your thighs. âItâs so big, too,â you said, showing off its size, where the blunt tip rested well above your navel. âEveryone say thank you, Daddy Kento!â
Your chat was instantly flooded with predictable responses, but Nanami couldnât look away from you. You were enjoying yourself, clearly. You mustâve thought you were so smart, renting out a P. O. box, going on and on about how grateful you were to your dedicated fans when he reached out to ask if you accepted physical donations, and you were smart. It was only a shame that Nanami loved you enough to look past all of your attempts to keep him away.
As you began to move onto your knees, he allowed himself one more intervention.
n. kento sent 3,000 credits!
n. kento: Take it to the hilt.
It was cruder than he usually cared to be, but as your eyes flickered towards your monitor, your lips quirked into a slight smile. You didnât respond verbally, but you nodded, and sunk down onto his cock.
Immediately, his hand wasnât enough, but he tried to make do â matching your agonizingly slow pace, imagining what it would feel like to have you lower yourself down onto his real cock, rather than a cheap imitation. Trails of iridescent slick dripped down the dark silicone, your camera positioned strategically to catch every bounce of your breasts as your breathing hitched, to provide the optimal view of your pussy stretching around the tip, then the head, then the shaft as you lowered yourself slowly. âItâItâs so big,â you repeated, bringing a hand up to your stomach while the other remained on the floor, keeping you stable. âI mean, I knew it would be, butâfuckââ Another inch, Nanamiâs fist moving over the same part of his cock. You let out an airy laugh. âJust be thankful Iâm so tough.â
âI am,â Nanami muttered, his voice echoing off the bare walls of his office. âYouâre perfect.â
âI really wanna cum on this one, too â to, like, christen it, or something. Been keeping myself pent up all day for it.â With a pitchy keen, you brought yourself a few inches higher, then dropped. Your free hand shot away from your stomach and back to the floor as you continued to bounce on the toyâs length, getting just a little deeper each time. âWelcome it to family, yâknow? Maybe make it a regular, for you sadists out there.â
Nanami stiffened at the thought of you fucking yourself on a replica of his cock in front of thousands of people twice a week; drooling and panting as you told your viewers how big he was, how good he felt inside of you. With his restraint brought to its limits, he fucked his fist carelessly, his attention fixed on the steady movements of your hips as you rode his toy. Your eyes didnât flutter closed, this time â they clenched shut, and you couldnât seem to keep your voice under control, little mewls and half-conscious whines bubbling up from your chest as you struggled to take that much more of him with every thrust. When you did manage to speak, your voice was uneven, whiney, so sweet it made him want to dig his teeth into something and tear. âIâm so close,â and then, as you brought yourself back down, so close to bottoming out, âI wanna cum!â
âYou will,â Nanami whispered. He knew you couldnât hear him, but it was true â you would, and if heâd been able to, he wouldâve made you. He wouldâve let you fuck yourself on his cock whenever you asked, wouldâve woken you up every morning coming undone on his tongue and made sure you fell asleep with his cock buried inside of you. If you were with him, youâd never have to think again, never have to feel anything but pleasure â any time you wanted it, every time you wanted it. Heâd make sureâ
You didnât moan as you reached the toyâs base, you screamed. One of your hands moved to the space between your thighs, two fingers rubbing quick circles into your clit as you nursed yourself through your orgasm. Nanami didnât stand a chance, still chasing his fantasies as he spilled over his hand; searing hot cum pooling on his lap, soaking into the material of his shirt, spilling onto his desk. He didnât stop moving his hand, though, not until you went limp â bending at the waist, bracing yourself on the floor. Finally, you managed to raise your head, flashing that brilliant smile towards the camera. Of course, Nanami smiled back.
In a daze, he watched you ease yourself off of the toy and wrap up your stream, so familiar from your script that he wouldâve been able to recite it with confidence. Even after you signed off, the screen going black, he didnât move, only letting his head roll to the side with a shallow sigh.
It was pathetic, just how much he loved you. It was painful, being so far from someone who made him feel so irrationally happy.
He could only count the days until he wouldnât have to limit himself to only watching from a distance any longer.
~
There was a man in your apartment.
A man you didnât want to be in your apartment, just to be clear. Youâd heard the front door open, seen a bulky silhouette moving through your living room, and now, you were listening to him riffle through your bedroom as you hid in the en suite bathroom â crouched in the smallest corner you could find with both hands locked over your mouth, trying to stifle the sound of your own breathing. The door was locked, but that didnât matter. You didnât want to find out how much a thin sheet of wood would do to protect you. You didnât want to give him a reason to acknowledge you at all.
As far as you could tell, there was only one intruder. You could only hear one pair of muffled footsteps, with second-long gaps between every little movement. The air caught in your throat as you heard him edge closer, closer, then pause. There was a dull clack, the sound of metal clashing against plastic, and you relaxed, sighing into your palms. Your filming equipment. It was expensive, but nothing you couldnât replace. If you were lucky, heâd take what he could carry and leave.
And that was what he seemed to be doing, too â more rustling interrupted every so often by a few moments of heart-wrenching silence. Soon enough, you heard the intruder start to move again, his footsteps edging closer to the bathroom door as he moved to leave your bedroom entirely, andâ
â(Y/n)?â
Fuck.
You didnât say anything, holding your breath and digging your nails into your cheeks, willing yourself not to move, not to think. You didnât make a sound, you couldnât have, and yet he kept talking.
âI know youâre in there. Please, come out.â
He couldnât know. He couldnât know. Youâd kept the lights off, and you hadnât moved in minutes, andâ
He tried the knob, and something cracked deep inside of your chest. There was an airy sigh, then a dull thud, like he was leaning against the door frame. âPlease,â he repeated, sounding more exasperated than angry. âI donât want to scare you.â
âY-you can take whatever you want,â you stuttered, your voice unsteady, just a touch louder than it really had to be. That was fine. You didnât have to pretend to be brave, so long as you made it out of this alive and uninjured. âI wonât call the police â I canât call the police, I left my phone in the kitchen. You can take it, too. I⊠I donât have a lot of cash, but my camera, it should be worthââ
âI donât want your camera, love.â If you hadnât known better, you mightâve thought he sounded wistful. âCome out, or Iâll break down the door.â
Honestly, it hadnât occurred to you that he could.
It took a second to pry your hands off of your face, and another to push yourself to your feet â your legs shaking as you struggled to stand. Almost mechanically, you moved towards the door; unlocking it in the same motion as you pulled it open. Light from your bedroom spilled into the entryway, revealingâ
God.
He was taller than youâd expected him to be.
Six feet at least, with a build to match. The sleeves of his dress-shirt were rolled up to his elbow, showing off arms so muscular, you wouldnât have been surprised if heâd planned to tear your door off its hinges with his bare hands. He had a duffle bag slung over his shoulder, visibly full, but you could still see your equipment standing untouched behind him, and you couldnât imagine anything else he wouldâve wanted to take. His blonde hair was swept back, out of his eyes, and he was holding a butcherâs knife in his right hand, the blade wrapped in leopard-spotted fabric. Surprisingly, though, his weapon wasnât what concerned you the most.
He was smiling. No, actually, that wasnât right.
He was beaming.
â(Y/n),â he said, again. You didnât let yourself wonder why he knew your name. âIâIâm sorry, I shouldâve introduced myself earlier. I mightâve gotten a little carried away â Iâm sorry if I frightened you.â
ââŠitâs okay,â you managed, your voice barely audible. âAre you going to kill me?â
His expression dropped. âNo. Of course not.â And then, after a brief lapse, âIâd never hurt you. IâŠâ You saw his right hand flex around the grip of his knife, and thought you might black out. âIâm a fan.â
Instantly, you felt the blood freeze in your veins.
Fuck. Fuck.
You knew you shouldâve gone into accounting.
âI⊠Youâre a fan?â You tried to smile, but it mightâve come across more pained than relieved. âIâm sorry, Iâm not used to meeting people whoâve caught my stream. Should I know what to call you?â
And just like that, his grin was back, any momentary tension assayed. You wished he wouldâve put down the knife, too, but beggars canât be choosers. âKento,â he said, and for the first time, you noticed the pink hue creeping over his cheeks. âNanami Kento.â
You grit your teeth as you struggled to place him. After a second, it came to you.
Kento. Right. The dildo guy.
Somehow, knowledge provided little comfort. Still, you soldiered on. âItâs really nice to meet you, Nanami.â You clasped your hands behind your back, rocking gently on your heels. âIâIâm sorry, I wasnât expecting any guests. If you want to step out for a couple minutes, I can change into something more comfortable, and show you how appreciative I am for yourââ
âIâm not an idiot.â He cut you off, still grinning. âYouâre coming with me.â
You didnât let your smile waver, either. âAnd, if I didnât want to go with youâŠ?â
 âIâm afraid this isnât about what you want, anymore.â
You meant to say something â opened your mouth and everything â but nothing came out. Your heart tightened in your chest, a not inconsiderable portion of your mind screaming for you to run, run, run. And yet, when he took you by the wrist in a feather-light hold, leading you through your own apartment and out into the hall, it was all you could do to smile and follow after him.
~
The first thirty minutes of the car ride passed in silence. Nanami â because you couldnât stand to keep thinking of him as âthat guy who bought you a dildo shaped like his own dick and paid you thousands of dollars to ride it live on streamâ â kept his knife in his lap, his hand falling away from the wheel and onto its hilt whenever you so much as took a deep breath. Eventually, your eyes fell to the clock built into his dashboard, and you broke through your paralysis with a nervous laugh.
âItâs a little funny,â you started, for lack of anything else to do. âIâd actually normally be getting ready for my stream, around now.â
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched him swallow, his jaw tensing. âI know.â
Great. Okay. Whatever. âI donât mind, yâknow,â you managed, before you could let yourself fully consider what you were going to say. âIf it means we donât have to go through with the whole kidnapping thing, I really wouldnât mind sleeping with you â you can even take pictures, if youâd like that, or record, whichever youâd prefer.â
âThatâs not what Iââ
âI havenât tried a lot of hardcore stuff, but I wouldnât mind if thatâs what youâre into. We donât even have to go back to my apartment, you could just pull over, andââ
âThatâs not what Iâm interested in.â He didnât raise his voice, but his tone left no room for protest. âIâm not going to⊠Iâm not going to just fuck you once and leave you by the side of the road. Iâm doing this for your sake.â
As if youâd willingly climbed into a maniacâs car. âI⊠Iâm not following, Kento.â
âItâs for your own protection. Once I thought to look, it took me hours to find out everything about you.â He spared you a quick glance, that same uncanny smile. One of his hands left the wheel and, rather than moving to his knife, found your knee, squeezing gently. It took everything you had not to scream. âImagine what someone could do with that kind of information. They could blackmail you, if they found your full name, or track you down if they pieced together your address. Itâd be a miracle if they were only a stalker. It just wasnât safe to let you keep going on that way.â
âYeah,â you mumbled, more to yourself than to him. âThey could even break into my apartment and abduct me at knifepoint.â
His gaze narrowed, but his smile only softened. Neither of you spoke for the rest of the journey.
After far too long and not nearly long enough, you reached your destination: a housing complex, leagues nicer (and more expensive) than your own rundown building. Calling them apartments wouldâve been a disservice; they were more similar to free-standing condos, or miniature villas slotted just outside of the cityâs more metropolitan districts. Without a word, you let him guide you into a relatively generic home, its only notable feature being the absolute lack of evidence of meaningful life within it. You wouldnât have been surprised if it was a rental, leased exclusively to give him someplace to do⊠well, whatever he planned to do to you. Itâd be more off-putting to know that someone actually lived someplace so vacant.
He led you through the empty halls and up a flight of stairs, keeping you in front of him and in his line of sight at all times. Finally, you reached the door he seemed to be looking for and, with a nod by way of instruction, let yourself inside.
Before you stood, puzzlingly, your own bedroom.
Or â the parts of it you could make out on camera, at least. The bed was the same size, the same model, made with the same sheets and littered with the same pillows, but the floor was covered in a harsh white carpeting, the surrounding walls soundproofed with suffocating black foam. Camera equipment identical to your own had been set-up at the foot of your bed, but an unfamiliar silver laptop replaced your own sticker-covered monstrosity. You didnât see any chains, whips, or shock collars, which was good. You still didnât know what the fuck was going on, which was bad.
Confused, you turned to Nanami as he crossed the threshold and rather conservatively, shut and locked the door. âThere are clothes on the bed,â he explained, with a tone that made it difficult to tell whether or not he knew how weird this was. âA script, too. Memorize as much as you can.â
So he still expected you to stream. Or, that was what you hoped, at least â considering the only alternative was that he was planning to make an extremely elaborate snuff film. âIâm not used to using scripts.â
âYouâll manage.â
You didnât bother trying to argue, only moving towards the bed and attempting to forget he was there entirely.
The âclothesâ heâd left for you turned out to be lingerie â the nice stuff, too, white and lacey and bridal with a babydoll cut. You glanced over his script (which, disturbingly, didnât exactly not sound like you) as you got dressed and fixed your hair, doing the best you could without any of your usual supplies. You wouldnât be able to reapply your make-up, but youâd put some on earlier, andâ
You almost laughed at yourself, stifling a chuckle.
Youâd been kidnapped, and you were worried about your make-up. If you got out of this alive, you swore, youâd never touch foundation or a ring light or a camera ever again.
He didnât have to tell you when it was time â you wouldâve known by instinct alone. With Namami watching from an armchair pushed against the opposite wall, you clambered onto the bed and took your usual position, kneeling in center frame. Heâd never asked for your credentials, and yet, when you glanced towards the laptop positioned just underneath the main camera, you found that your own profile was already pulled up, a miniature timer in the corner of the screen counting down the seconds until you went live.
As it reached thirty seconds âtill, it occurred to you that you were in a soundproof room alone with the man whoâd kidnapped you and was currently holding you hostage, and that no one couldâve possibly known where you were or, more importantly, who youâd been taken by.
As it reached fifteen, you realized you were being held captive and being forced to wear bridal lingerie that your kidnapped mustâve picked out with the occasion in mind.
As it reached five, for the first time that day, you thought you might actually start to cry.
And, as it reached zero, you put on your biggest, brightest smile and hoped beyond hope that youâd stop thinking entirely, eventually.
âWelcome home!â Skipping over your normal grace period only felt right. You didnât think youâd be able to survive sitting in silent, motionless suspension for another second, let alone a full minute. âSorry if I seem a little nervous tonight â to tell the truth, I kind of am. Iâve got a major announcement, and I just canât put it off any longer.â
Reflexively, your attention drifted first to your own feed â you looked perfect, as always â then to your chat, moving quickly despite your sudden start. You caught a few of the longer messages in your peripheral.
secretary.lover: Is it just me, or does she seem kind scared lmao?
blueeyeswhitedragon: yeahhh i thought her room looked kinda weird too lol
justheretowatch: fuck ur pretty
rapidfire: let me guess, another fake dick?
âI know I probably shouldâve given you guys more of a warning,â you went on, fighting the temptation to break, to yell for them to call the police, to give up entirely and make a run for it. âButâŠâ Â
You forced yourself to laugh, to beam, to clap your hands together in front of your chest like a schoolgirl â excited to tell her friends that sheâd gone through with her first ever confession. âIâm getting married!â
You didnât have a ring to show off, but you tried your best to preen regardless, to not let any amount of fear or discomfort or hesitation show on your shining expression. After a show delay, congratulations and well-wishes filled your chat (some genuine, others more reluctant), and you did your best to go on without letting the sizable knot slowly gaining mass in the back of your throat smother your voice entirely. âThis is going to be my last stream â for a while, at least, until we get settled in. AndâŠâ
You tried to remember whatâd been listed next in Nanamiâs script, but your conscious mind was bogged down by a thick layer of buzzing static, your sense of improvisation dulled by a heavy dose of anxiety. Your eyes flickered to where Nanami was sitting behind your equipment, only to find that the chair heâd formerly occupied empty. You didnât have time to panic before the edge of the mattress dipped under a new weight, and you remembered what you were supposed to say. âMy husband actually wanted to cameo on my send-off show. I was a little hesitantââ Another dip in the mattress, this one much closer than the last. ââbut he insisted. I thought you all deserved a chance to meet him, too.â
As soon as you finished, you felt a large hand on your shoulder, a sudden presence at your back. Your gaze fell back to your feed, your own image now accompanied by that of your captor â on his knees behind you, one hand on your shoulder and the other on your hip, the framing positioned so that his head was cut off just above the mouth. The lower half of his face was covered with a black surgical mask, and you had to stop yourself from frowning. You hadnât expected him to be stupid enough to show his face on camera, but still.
Your heart dropped into your stomach as you felt his hand fall away from your shoulder, slipping underneath the lace camisole of your babydoll. You tried not to move, not to flinch, but you couldnât stop yourself from jerking forward as you felt his hand slip under your bralette, the angular ridges of his knuckles visible through the thin silk. Despite everything heâd said about not hurting you, about doing this for your protection, he made no attempt to be gentle â the calloused pads of his fingers pressing into the curve of your breast with enough force to bruise. You bit back a whimper, refusing to give him the satisfaction of a sincere reaction. If you wanted to go home, you had to put up with this. Heâd never said anything about pretending to enjoy it.
(In the back of your mind, you knew he hadnât said anything about letting you go home, either. Still, you didnât let yourself dwell on such discontinuities).
 You shouldâve known better than to think heâd attempt to follow the normal flow of your stream, and yet, it still caught you off-guard when his unoccupied hand found its way to the waistband of your panties, then to your clothed sex. You werenât overly sensitive, despite how you mightâve acted in front of your viewers, but you were still on edge, still panicked, and while the adrenaline being held at knifepoint mightâve sparked was beginning to fade, having your kidnapper grope you on camera was enough to bring on a fresh wave. Reflexively, you pressed your back into his broad chest as his thumb traced over the length of your slit, pausing only momentarily to press into your clit with a dull, oppressive sort of pressure, biting down on your bottom lips to stop anything vulnerable and pathetic from escaping. If Nanami was affected by your stoicism, it wasnât enough to stop him from pulling the flimsy material to the side entirely and slipping two fingers into you, your now-slick cunt providing humiliatingly easy access. In the same motion, the heel of his palm pressed into your clit, the friction immediately too harsh, too much. It wouldâve been too much if he wasnât touching you at all. It wouldâve been too much if he was still sitting alone in his dark, empty house â getting off to the idea of degrading someone he claimed to care about so publicly.
It didnât help that you were wet. Not dripping, sure, but wet enough for there to be an audible, slick clicking-type noise as he pumped his digits into you, never taking the pressure off of your clit. You could feel his cock pressed into your ass, already hard, already too familiar not to be nauseating, but he didnât seem to be in a rush to move past your exhibition; his pace measured and experimental, his fingers prone to spreading apart and curling inside of you. To distract yourself, you moved your attention back to your chat, trying to pick out the longer messages between donation notifications.
user84343: girl i call dibs when youâre done with him
hotbox420: no seriously y/n are you okay???
bunnygirl69: still canât believe youâre leaving us for him </3 canât say i donât see why tho ToT
absolutely.soaked: Blink twice if youâre in danger lmaoooo
âG-guys, Iâm totallyââ Your breath hitched as he forced another finger into you, the stretch now a touch past ignorable. His other hand kneaded at your chest, blunt nails scraping against tender flesh, and momentarily, you wondered if it really wouldâve been so bad to take your chances and let him kill you right away. âIâm totally fine, Iâm justââ His nails bit into your skin by way of warning, and you allowed yourself a single, stilted moan. âIâm just so happy that I finally get toâtoââ
You didnât know what you were supposed to say, but it didnât matter. Nanamiâs hand dropped from your chest to your side, his arm locking over your midriff and hauling you that much closer. You couldnât stop yourself this time â whimpering as the tempo of his fingers sped up, as tears started to prick at the corners of your eyes. You glanced around the bedroom, searching for anything familiar, anything you could use to stabilize yourself, anything that you could start to find comforting. Instead, your eyes landed on the duffle bag heâd carried out of your apartment, the zipper now partially undone. You couldnât see much, but you could make out the handle of a pink hitachi. It wasnât difficult to guess what the rest of the bagâs contents looked like, what heâd spent so long riffling through your possessions to find.
It wouldnât been pointless to try and hold back the crooked, ebbing sob that leaked past your lips. This time, when you turned to face your camera, it was with tears just beginning to spill and absolute terror written across your expression. âCall the police,â you managed to spit out, making no attempt to be subtle. âIâI donât actually know this man, and this isnât my apartment, andââ
It happened too quickly â like heâd been expecting you to do something so obviously short-sighted. You processed that he was pulling out of your cunt as you felt his fingers entangle themselves in your hair, and then your face was being shoved against the mattress, your body folding over itself as he forced you down. You tried to yell, tried to scream, but your voice was muffled by your own fucking comforter as you heard fabric shifting behind you, as you felt something warm and stiff and leaking align with your entrance. You refused to put a name to it, but that didnât help. Nothing wouldâve helped.
His palm pressed into the back of your head, his body slotting against yours as he leaned down, lowering his head so that he could speak directly into your ear. âIâm doing this for your own good,â he whispered, his voice muffled but still painfully audible. âIâm doing this because I love you.â
You didnât have a chance to response. He was already inside of you â his cock filling you to your breaking point.
You werenât sure if your viewers could hear you, but you hoped they could. It wouldâve been a pity to sob so loudly for the sole entertainment of the sick, sick man currently rutting into you, grinding into your cunt from behind with a kind of animalistic desperation â all desire and no control. It was a struggle to stay on your knees, not to go entirely limp underneath him, but you doubted it wouldâve made a difference if you hadnât, that he wouldnât have fucked your limp body just as enthusiastically. Out of the corner of your eyes, you could just barely see the monitor â the miniature image of Nanamiâs body moving on top of yours, his blond hair still obscuring the other half of his face, and then next to it, your chat. If youâd been thinking more clearly, you wouldnât have let yourself look, wouldnât have let yourself fully acknowledge that there were still thousands of people watching you, but you werenât thinking at all, and you wouldâve given anything for someone to say something that made you forget where you were, just for a second.
sniper727: so the bitch likes it rough? hot
callmeanonymous: FINALLY!!! Iâve been waiting for some cnc rp for actual years.
blueeyeswhitedragon: hey i think i might work with that guy
hotbox420: yeah no iâm calling the cops.
Predictably, your efforts were grotesquely unsuccessful.
Nanami didnât seem as bothered. The weight on the back of your head disappeared as his hands found your hips, pulling up as he straightened his back. For anyone else, it mightâve been an awkward position â holding up your uncooperative form while bouncing you on his cock  â but no amount of unpleasant technicalities couldâve stopped him from burying himself to hilt with every stroke, keeping you in a constant state of mind-numbing fullness. You tried to talk, again, to call for help, but fractured mewls and pathetic whines drowned out whatever you mightâve said, and even those were put to an end as Nanami took you by the jaw, turning you to face him as his lips crashed into your â his mask either pulled down or discarded entirely, you couldnât be bothered to check. The kiss itself was messy, rough, brutal, his tongue raking over yours as you sobbed unabashedly into his mouth â your connection only growing more chaotic as his hand once again found your clit and ground two fingers into the sensitive bundle of nerves. You knew what he wanted. You knew what he was trying to do.
And you couldnât do anything to stop him.
With a ragged sob, you came undone around his cock, any strength you mightâve once had flooding out of your body and dripping down his shaft. Nanami groaned into your mouth, drawing back just far enough to bury his face in your neck and mouth meaningless nothings into your throat as he chased his own climax. He thrusted into you again once, twice, and then you felt pure heat pour into you â a new kind of torture that rendered you entirely senseless. You didnât try to scream, again.
You were distantly aware of him moving, shifting, pulling something out of his pocket as he muttered a mix of âyou did so wellâs and âI love youâs into your skin. When you did finally manage to raise your head, you didnât think to look toward the remote in his hand or your tattered lingerie or the cum slowly leaking out of your entrance. Rather, your attention landed on the same thing it always did during your streams â your monitor.
Youâd never know why, but for whatever reason, you could feel your heart break in your chest as you realized that the screen had already gone black.
Warnings: Yandere themes, unhealthy relationships, unhealthy power dynamics, not SFW, implied past dubcon/noncon and verbal humiliation. Word count: 4.7k.
A single frayed thread can unravel even the grandest of tapestries.
Youâd like to delude yourself into thinking youâre ready. That those weeks of mental preparation, practicing mannerisms and pretty smiles in the mirror would bear fruit. Is it foolish to hope and yield a bountiful harvest from what youâve sown when the soil is barren?
Dallying in your thoughts wonât do any good. However, what else is there for you to do? Youâve paced back and forth in your quarters until your heels ached, fussed over your appearance, the shade of rouge on your lips, and washed away the incriminating ink on the skin of your wrist. That experience could be compared to a trivial trial for what was to come.
You thought your heart would overwork itself to death with how it pounded away, like a war drum before a decisive battle.
Keep reading
My sister gave me an entire tin of my favourite crayon colour
đYandere!Commander!Enji x F!Soldier!Readerđ
Part 1â€ïž | Part 2â€ïž | Part 3â€ïž 5.6k words
Summary:
Youâre no fool. Youâve always known exactly what Enji wants from you. The only thing is, you never expected him to get it.
TWs for: Noncon | Rape, sexist undertones, pregnancy talk/forced impreg
Tags: Breeding kink, pregnancy kink i guess, enji finally knocks up his cute wittle soldier-secretary, a stand up fuck, like enji picks you up and fucks you :)
(A/N) i was thinking the other night, is subjugation a bimbofication fic? the answer: yes kinda
âââ
You suppose thereâs a quite a few routes you could take with the harassment situation.
The first one is not to report it at all. Youâd never be able to live with yourself if you didnât try, though. You donât want to be the bystander within your own life again.
A suggestion from the military website is to contact the harasser and tell them firmly to stop. You know that thereâs no way in hell that would work. If anything, it sounds like a surefire method to end up in a worse situation than before.
You could, apparently, find out whoâs in charge of Enji and report it to them. This also sounds like an awful idea. Too personal and too loud.
Finally, you could report it to somewhere outside of your base. Something more official than any of the other options. In the end, itâs what you decide on doing.
Keep reading
can u mayhaps do a yedam as your bf post
yes i may!! also sorry for the long wait but thank you for requesting <3
feel like I got really carried away with this considering how long I made it, and I still had so much more to add đđđanyways enjoy!!!
heâs vvv shy at first
before dating you were literally an angel to him
he still thinks of you as an angel when you two start dating
only difference is that his gf/bf is an angel!!
he really adores you đ„ș
heâs so shy at first that he actually struggles to keep eye contact with you
he just thinks youâre too perfect
ugh listen he just really adores you
once you two get comfortable with each other:
he wonât stop talking
but in a good way!!
he tells you about his day without missing any detail
and he expects the same from you!!
full of laughs
really listening to you sing
even if your not good at it
makes you two duet at karoake
would make the both of you memorise song lyrics so you two can make a cover of it
and heâll listen to those covers whenever he misses you đ„șđ„șđ„șđ„ș
he absolutely loves it when you two rap
mino x bobby songs are his favourite to rap with you
he always records the two of you whether youâre rapping/singing just for fun or not
and when you ask him why he tells you theyâre memories <333
takes pictures of you when youâre not looking
has a whole album dedicated to you
his whole drive is literally filled with songs and pictures and videos of you smh
loves putting those cute filters on when taking selfies together
COUPLE ITEMS
ok so with Yedam it wouldnât be full on
but like it would be discrete but not too driscrete you get me ????
like matching phone cases, jewellery, hats and shoes!
heâll definitely buy you 827;837472929 of them
ESPECIALLY when he goes on tour
yâall would have matching key chains uwu
your dates would consist of you two in isolated areas
where thereâs not many people around
so no restaurants or theme parks
but lots of picnics and walking on the beach uwu
sorry but....
STUDY DATES
ok heâs literally Einstein as a kpop idol đ
yâall are gnna study together
so if youâre failing in any subjects
donât worry!!! Yedam will help you!!!
even if you donât ask him too
the second he finds out your falling behind in any classes he will do his best to help you
mans is literally ranked no.1 in his own school
he
will
help
you
youâll get those good grades ok!!
so you know how he has those plush key chains on his bag ????
would be a switch when cuddling
would be the big spoon and the little spoon
doesnât really mind he just wants whatever makes you happy
but i kinda feel like he leans a little towards the big spoon side ????
is it just me ???
but like on days where heâs upset he has to be the little spoon
he just likes the feeling of you having your arms wrapped around him when heâs upset
brings him comfort and lets him be reassured that he has someone
I feel like heâs somewhat obsessed with your hair
he looked at it once while he was the big spoon and was like âyou got really soft hairâ
loves running his through it
he probably wants to style your hair too
but heâs too shy to ask :(
so when he stares at your hair vvv intensely
donât say anything
just hand him the brush ok.
Yedam gets at 10/10 for being a good boyfriend !!
can somebody plz request a part 2
Rating: Explicit/R-18+
Words: 4,609
Warnings: noncon/dubcon, monster fucking (?), size difference, over sized genitalia and the buckets of cum to go with it, oral sex, fellatio, eventual consent
A/N: After consulting with my editor in chief, we agreed that the fishmen probably feel a bit like dolphins - firm to the touch but stupidly smooth, a bit clammy - so that's where my descriptive inspiration for this one came from. Y'know. Just in case anyone ends up wondering what the fuck I was smoking while I wrote this. lol And as always, please enjoy! : )
â„â„â„â„
Arlong was not what you would consider a nice man.
There was something mean about him, and undeniably so, but the way he crowds you against the wall late one evening still manages to catch you off guard. Youâd thought you had already seen everything his cruelty had to offer. Foolishly, youâd believed that there was a certain line even someone like him would not cross.
Regrettably, youâd been wrong about that.
âW - what are you doing?â
âDonât be coy.â He mutters while he idly, possessively toys with a strand of your hair between his webbed fingers. âI know youâve been looking forward to this.â
The cloying stink of booze on his breath hits you all at once and you wrinkle your nose in distaste. You donât mean to do it. You regret it almost instantly but Arlong doesnât care for the why or the how, or the rushed apology already forming on the tip of your tongue. All he sees is the discomfort etched across your expression and his demeanor responds in kind, becoming surly and aggressive in the same moment.
With a rumbling grunt, he steps into you and bodily shoves you against the wall. The amount of force in just that simple gesture has you quailing under the imposing weight of him even as you start to shirk away. You think to bolt for safety a little too late and his clammy hand takes advantage of that split second indecision to grab your chin, forcing your head up to look at him.
âWhatâs the matter, sweetheart? Hm?â He curls himself over you, bracing his other arm high above your head on the wall so he can lean close and get in your face. Youâve never felt quite so minuscule as you do standing there, frozen to the spot and horribly dwarfed by the towering fishman whoâs hacksaw nose was mere inches from yours now.
With each passing second, it was becoming exceedingly hard not to panic.
âAm I not to your liking? Is that it? Youâve really never thought about this before?â
Your mouth opens but nothing comes out. You arenât sure what to say. You donât know what it is he wants to hear.
Arlong doesnât wait around for a proper response, though, and instead trails smooth, rubbery fingers down your neck to your shoulder, and then further still to grasp your wrist. You put up no resistance when he pulls, unceremoniously directing your slack hand to the front of his shorts and you jolt at the firm weight pressing up into your palm.
Sucking in a stilted gasp, your eyes go wide at him. âI - I havenât - -â
âNo?â He cuts across you with a faintly disappointed sigh. âNot even a little? Youâre not at all curious?â
You whimper, shaking your head when he squeezes and manually forces your hand to close around the stiff outline in his pants. It was big and still growing, as evidenced by the eager twitch it gives at your touch. Shame immediately washes over you when your pussy clenches, the blood in your neck pounding as you try to turn away from him.
âOf course not, w - what would I have to be curious about?â
âYou ever seen a fishmanâs cock before?â
Your ears were starting to burn. âNuh ⊠no. Please, Arlong. I donât - -â
âCome on. Iâm sure youâll like it. There isnât anything else like it in the whole world, yâknow. One of a kind.â
Same as before, he doesnât give you a chance to sort through your thoughts before taking the incentive. His unoccupied hand drops from the wall and tugs at the waistband of his shorts even while he wrests your twisting hand where he wants it to be. You struggle wildly now, adrenaline fueled fear making you desperate and jerky, but heâs much too strong to break free from. You were trapped.
Horrified, you screw your eyes shut before you can catch a glimpse of whatâs hanging between his legs. Youâd never seen one before - not a fishmanâs, and you would have preferred to keep it that way. The hushed rumors youâd overheard about encounters between people like Arlong and humans such as yourself were nothing kind, after all.
But with very little effort on his part, he clamps your hand into place and you go stock-still at the sensation of porcelain smooth, velvety skin under your fingertips. It doesnât feel half as repulsive as youâd imagined it would. And, youâre surprised to find, it doesnât look anywhere near as unnatural as youâd assumed it to be when you apprehensively crack your eyes open and glance at it.
What you had in your hand was just a cock. Nothing more and nothing less.
Albeit a rather large, hefty cock that was a slightly darker shade of blue than the rest of him but still by all accounts a normal looking appendage. If it hadnât been for itâs unusual color and the staggering size, you could have easily mistaken it for a humanâs.
Embarrassed, you flounder for something to say. âItâs ⊠itâs rather nice, isnât it?â
Arlong snorts and displaces a few of your wispy flyaways with the resulting puff of air, making you shudder between him and the wall. âDonât try to bullshit me. Sânot polite.â
âIâm not.â You insist, shyly forcing your gaze up to meet his. âI expected something different, thatâs all.â
âLike what?â He murmurs as he leans his weight into you, not so subtly pinning you under him. You swallow hard, hesitant to say it. But either by virtue of being mildly intoxicated or genuine sincerity on his part, you felt a strange sort of inclination to be honest with him.
âFrankly, I thought it would be more monstrous.â
Arlong manages to catch you off guard again when he outright laughs at that. âGive it time. Iâm not fully hard yet.â
Your eyes go big as saucers. âW - wha - -â
He laughs again, somehow even louder this time, and you start to quake with renewed vigor as his cock does indeed continue to twitch and grow in your hand. You couldnât believe that it would get any bigger than it already was but the proof was right in front of your face. It was still filling out, becoming increasingly more weighty in your palm, and that knowledge terrified you far more than you were willing to admit.
âDonât look so scared.â He coos, anything but sympathetic when he notices the obvious disquiet casting a shadow over your face. His suddenly good mood did not bode well for you at all. âYou said it was nice, didnât you?â
âWell ⊠well, yes, but - -â
âHere. Let me show you something.â
Releasing his hold on you, Arlong clamps his moist palm down on the back of your neck and unceremoniously steers you forward, away from the wall. You donât even think to fight it. And how could you when your fate was already sealed? Youâd given him an inch by conceding that his cock was not entirely disagreeable and now he was taking a mile.
It was your own fault, really.
âWait - hold on.â You stammer, panic suddenly creeping into your voice when you realize he was making a beeline with you for the nearest chair. âI didnât mean it like that, Arlong! I just - -â
âYou just what?â He sneers. âFelt like teasing me some more? Thought itâd be funny to tempt me with that pretty little mouth of yours again?â
You sputter in red faced affront. âI never - -â
Cutting you off yet again, he forcefully shoves you down onto your knees. Hard.
You seethe at the splintering pain racing up your legs as he pivots around you to plop down on the waiting seat, his ever present grip on the back of your neck quickly dragging you closer. Arlongâs anticipation for what was coming next was almost palpable, the eager excitement in his motions clear as day. In a last ditch effort, you try to twist away from him but he holds firm even as he works to tug his shorts the rest of the way down with the opposite hand.
âI know youâve thought about this.â He says it again, breathy now, as if repetition would somehow make it true. âIâve seen the way you look at me, sweetheart. Thereâs no need to hide it.â
Whatever biting insult you were going to spit at him catches in your throat and momentarily chokes you when he gets his pants down over his knees, cock springing up in all its full glory. You outright stare, your mouth going dry. Mind blank and pussy aching with phantom pain.
You werenât sure what he expected you to do with it. He was far too big to fit in any human orifice, surely; but if he was at all concerned about the logistics involved he certainly didnât show it.
Casually kicking his shorts off, Arlong plants his feet firmly on the floor and shuffles his long legs wide open to welcome you in. The heavy sway of his hanging nutsack seems to taunt you, silently promising a steaming hot load that you werenât prepared to take. You audibly gulp down your nerves as he pulls you closer, right up against him until the sinfully smooth shaft of his cock is pressed tight against your cheek. It was hard to breathe through the potently masculine musk assaulting your nose and even harder to come to terms with the way your cunt gushes in response to it.
Why was this turning you on so much?
âArlong ⊠please!â You mewl, helpless to stop it when he relentlessly rubs his cock against your face as if to scent you. âPlease listen to me. I never intentionally tried to tease you. Iâm sorry âŠâ
âLiar.â A sharp thwack against your cheek accompanies this accusation, the fleshy head of his dick leaving a sharp sting in its wake. âYou want me. Just admit that. If you do, your punishment for being such a flirty slut wonât be so severe.â
You bristle at that, trying once again to recoil from him, but he merely pinches your neck even tighter to keep you in place. All you can do is watch in mounting horror as he takes his cock in the opposite hand and starts to pump it, slowly, as if to coax it that last little bit harder. The prominent vein running along the underside visibly throbs for you while he does it, pushing against the thin layer of skin in a rhythmic beat which probably would have flattered you under better circumstances. You hadnât thought heâd get this worked up over you.
But, to be fair, you also hadnât expected Arlong to be interested in a human woman in the first place.
âLike the view? Youâre going to be a good girl and suck it for me, arenât you, sweetheart?â
Dazedly, you watch the steady up and down motion of his webbed hand until you eventually find yourself nodding along with it. You felt vaguely like an idiot for consenting to this but there was no denying how tantalizing he looked. For better or worse, you were willing to take the risk.
And that seems to amuse him a great deal, his raspy laugh misting over you even as he adds a twist to his pumping motion, tugging at the foreskin in the process. Scandalized surprise rushes to the forefront of your mind when you catch your first peek of the glans and realize itâs a blue so dark and rich it was almost purple. Itâs such a stark contrast from the rest of his uniquely pigmented skin that you immediately want to see more of it, and you lean forward to get a better look with nothing short of rapt fascination. Youâd never seen anything quite like it before.
âYouâre that interested now?â He murmurs knowingly, snickering faintly under his breath.
âOnly a little âŠâ
âLiar.â
But Arlongâs tone holds no real bite this time, and he graciously gives you what you want by rolling the meaty tip back to tuck it behind the ridged glans. The blunt head is just as impossibly smooth as the rest of him, his skin entirely free of pores or blemishes, and so firm that you arenât sure if there will be any give to it. Youâre immediately reminded that you and him were not the same, the differences between you two as glaring as ever.
Without missing a beat, you decide you no longer care.
Reaching up, you carefully take him in hand and a thrill runs through you at the sensation. Heâs every bit as silky as he looks but when you experimentally squeeze, it becomes apparent that heâs also relentlessly stiff. Youâd thought, maybe, it was just the muscle bound parts of him that were as unyielding as they appeared to be but even this area was so densely padded with fatty insulation that it offered very little cushion. It seemed, then, that the only truly soft spot on his body was probably his ballsack.
Tentatively, you rove your gaze up to look at him. âCan I really?â
âIâll be pissed if you donât.â
You scoff, trying not to smile, but when that fails you lean up to drag your tongue along the throbbing vein and hide the curl of your mouth. A triumphant sigh puffs out of him, the hand on the back of your neck relaxing slightly, but he makes no move to completely let go of you yet. The weight of his palm spurs you on and you go up a little higher to flick at the glans, pleasantly surprised at the taste of him. Salty and strong, yet not repugnant. It was a heady flavor, one youâve never sampled before, and you canât help but wonder if this is how all fishmen taste. It was strangely intoxicating.
âThereâs my good girl. Thatâs it.â He goads you, leaning back into the chair so he can fully appreciate the sight of you on your knees for him. âIs it as good as you thought itâd be? All you had to do was ask and I would have let you do this a lot sooner, you know.â
Resisting the urge to snap at him to shut up, you use your grip on his cock to angle the tip towards your face. The narrow slit in the center of that purple-blue bud winks at you, oozing a fresh bead of slick precum that glistens faintly in the overhead light. Sticking your tongue out, you lap it up with a hunger you hadnât expected from yourself and a fresh wave of bitter salt swarms your tastebuds. You moan, very quietly, against the glans before sealing your lips around it.
Arlongâs lean thighs give the faintest jolt in response, his pelvis lifting just enough to nudge his dick a little deeper into your mouth. You allow it, for the time being, far too caught up in the exquisite taste of him to worry about his propensity for being a bit pushy. It was in his nature, after all.
But when you try to take more of him on your own, it quickly becomes apparent that your earlier estimation of him had been right on the money. He was much too large to comfortably fit and you only make it a few inches down before your jaw starts to scream in protest. You pull back to suckle on the spongy head for a moment, laving it with your tongue before deciding to try again. The progress you make is negligible at best, your lips straining around his girth as you furrow your brows and noise a muffled sound of frustration around him.
âDonât try to force it, sweetheart. Youâll just hurt yourself.â He chuckles, the hand on the back of your neck sliding higher to curl around the curve of your skull. His palm is massive in comparison and you feel your cheeks start to warm when he condescendingly pats your head, tutting at you. âYouâll have to practice hard if you want to take it all someday.â
The heat inside your gut sparks anew as your eyes snap up at his face. He smirks right back, razor sharp rows of teeth glinting dangerously and reminding you, once again, that he was a real threat. An apex predator of the most deadly kind, and you were knelt at his feet sucking his cock like a good little pet. You should have been ashamed of yourself. You probably were going to be ashamed of yourself, later, when the carnal high faded and your senses returned.
For now, though, youâd already made peace with your fate and you pointedly give his cock a rough tug. That only makes Arlongâs lascivious grin widen, though, and youâre left with no other choice but come up off him with a wet, smacking pop to give your jaw a break.
Tilting your head back while you suck in a much needed lung full of air, you pull his cock to your open mouth and set it along your tongue. He hums appreciatively at the visual while you pump the length of him with your hand, letting more precum ooze out of him and onto your waiting palette. A faltering groan rises in the back of your throat at the taste, so heady and potent that it makes your mind spin dizzyingly fast. You couldnât get enough.
âHeh. I take it you like it then?â
In lieu of an answer, you seal your lips around him and lean forward again, glancing up at Arlong through the fall of your lashes. His stilted sigh of approval rushes straight to your cunt, and you give a needy little squirm as he drags webbed fingers along the side of your face to touch at the pulled taught corner of your mouth. Rubbery palm skirting along your cheek, he reaches further back and then clamps down on the nape of your neck so he can pull you somehow even closer to him.
Youâre pressed flush against the chair by the time heâs satisfied, neck straining to accommodate the length of his cock. Your unoccupied hand comes up to brace against his thigh when he starts to guide you through a bobbing motion, the stuffed full schlucking noise of your mouth almost unbearably loud in the otherwise quiet room. It sounds borderline obscene to you but he appears to enjoy it, resting his head against the back of the chair and sighing up at the ceiling with unmistakable pleasure coloring the exhalation.
Your pussy clenches at the sight of Arlong enjoying himself so much, enjoying what you were doing to him, and you offer the glans another enthusiastic suck in return. His fingers twitch against your neck and squeeze, just this side of painful. But he does a good job keeping himself in check, and you put a little more effort into pumping the part of him that your lips canât reach by way of thanks. He could all too easily rip you in half - in more ways than one - so you appreciated the restraint he was showing.
He doesnât even seem to notice the change in your hands pace though, his mouth running on drunken autopilot now that heâs let his guard down. Now that heâs fully given himself over to the wet warmth of your maw, he was uncharacteristically eager to heap his praises on you and you were more than happy to soak it all up.
âMy good, good girl. Yeah, you like that cock, donât you, baby? You love it. I can tell. Youâll never want another human to fuck you after Iâm done. Iâm gonnaâ ruin you, you know that? So damn good for me âŠâ
The tingling warmth that spreads through you makes it hard to think straight, your vision starting to swim as if you were looking through a foggy fish eye lense. You never thought heâd talk to you that way. Didn't think he could stand your kind enough to regard you as anything other than a nuisance to tolerate for the sake of his own goals. It may have just been the booze talking, you knew that, but you were still rather pleased by this turn of events anyway.
Your jaw was beginning to ache in earnest, though, and you whimper around his cock as you drag your hand down off his thigh to squeeze in between Arlongâs legs. Gently, you caress the heavy weight of his ballsack, delighted to find that it was just as soft and vulnerable as youâd suspected it would be. He hisses at the contact, hips lifting off the seat of the chair again, but he does it a little too roughly this time and you gag.
Seething through clenched teeth, he readjusts his hold on the back of your head, gets a better grip and slowly thrusts up into your mouth. The careful way he does it surprises you slightly, but you donât get a chance to linger on that thought for very long because he immediately repeats the motion without giving you a moment to adjust and your eyes start to mist up. He doesnât quite reach your throat like this, your lips already stretched to their limit and unable to accommodate any more of him, and yet that doesnât stop you from choking with each drawn out flex of his hips. You were going to be sick at this rate.
Sucking in a faltering wet breath through your nose, you try to brace yourself for his next upward stroke. You werenât sure how much more of this your gag reflex could take, or your poor jaw for that matter. Being on the receiving end of Arlongâs praises wasnât worth it if you just ended up spewing your guts all over him, ruining everything in the end. Plus, you were pretty sure heâd just redact everything heâd said if it came down to that. You were damned either way.
Deciding it was best to take a moment and regroup, lest the unthinkable happen, you try to pull off him but the hand on your head keeps you firmly in place. You let out a muffled squawk, as confused as you were terrified of what would happen if he kept going like this. But he doesnât seem to share any such concerns, and your gaze frantically shoots up at his face when he just keeps shallowly pumping into your mouth. He wasnât even looking at you, though, his eyes closed and turned up at the ceiling.
âThatâs it. Just a little more. I know it probably hurts, sweetheart, but just endure it a little bit longer for me, okay? Iâm getting close ⊠Iâm getting so close, baby. Can you feel it? Iâm gonnaâ give you such a big load ⊠ngh, youâll never be able to swallow it all, but thatâs okay. Just ⊠haah, just keep it in your sweet little mouth a bit longer, okay?â
You donât exactly have a choice in the matter, your cheeks burning hot as reflexive tears streak down your face. Abandoning his balls, you dig trembling fingers into the meat of Arlongâs inner thigh as a painful reminder that you were working on borrowed time here. But he seems to enjoy that, the groaning burst of air that puffs out of him in a sudden rush sending sympathetic shockwaves racing down your spine. Your panties were soaked at this point, uncomfortably clinging to your sticky cunt as you rock forward in a fruitless bid for relief. It was all you could do just to keep your lunch down, though, and you were far too lightheaded to even consider slipping your hand between your legs to rub circles into your clit. It wouldnât take much to send you over the edge, either.
Even through your clothes, you were sure to cum quick - but how could you possibly think about that right now when he was still thrusting into your mouth at such a staggered pace that you felt as violated as if heâd properly fucked you? It didnât make sense, how he had such a powerful effect on you when heâd barely even touched you so far. Almost like he had some sort of potent aphrodisiac at his deploy.
Could this possibly be a fishman, thing or was it just an Arlong thing?
âOooh yeah, baby, right there. Right there. Your mouth feels so damn good. Are you ready? Iâm gonnaâ give it to you now ⊠fuck, Iâm cumming, baby, Iâm cumming!â
With a feral, animalistic grunt, Arlong thrusts up off the chair and shoves his cock as far into your mouth as it will go. You sputter around him, frantically noising as your throat constricts and heaves against the pressure. In the same moment, he gives a full bodied shudder and hot, thick ropes shoot out of him to pool at the base of your tongue. Your eyes promptly roll back as you choke around his bubbling semen, face wet with tears and snot, and perspiration, but he doesnât stop. It just keeps coming out of him, flooding your mouth until youâre sure youâll drown in it.
So blissfully numb by the time he finally pulls out, you almost donât notice the absence. Itâs only when a fresh string of ejaculate plops heavy against your cheek that you realize he's cumming on your face now, and you obediently stick your tongue out to catch the salty discharge. He doesnât seem to be aiming for your mouth, though, and youâre left with no other choice than to sit there and let him paint your face white until the pulses gradually slow to a stop some moments later.
The last bit oozes out of him, achingly drained from the bottom of his balls it would seem, as he squeezes it from the base up with an accompanying guttural moan. You let him push your head back down without protest and lap up the sticky bead, much to Arlongâs heaving pleasure.
He was still panting from the exertion, trying to catch his breath, and you were still struggling to swallow the excessive cum in your mouth so you could breathe at all. An odd sense of peace settles in the aftermath and you think maybe, in a far off, dreamy sort of way, maybe he wasnât quite as mean as youâd pegged him. Someone inherently cruel wouldnât have been so mindful of your physical limitations, right?
Youâre pretty sure thatâs not how it usually goes, anyway.
Gathering yourself to the best of your ability, you glance down at the front of your shirt only to outright grimace. You were absolutely coated in sheets of fast drying cum, and you werenât so sure it wouldnât stain. Dammit.
âSo, uh. Do you always cum buckets, or was that all just for little olâ me?â You venture to ask, not the least bit surprised when your voice comes out a raspy mess. Youâd definitely need some warm tea after this.
âItâs a fishman thing.â He says rather flippantly, clearly unconcerned. âYouâll get used to it.â
Your head comes up in stark surprise. Well. That certainly answered your earlier question.
âYâknow,â you say, speaking cautiously slow. âThat sounds an awful lot like youâre planning on doing this again, boss.â
Arlong actually has the audacity to smirk at you, his pale eyes dancing with what could only be mischief, and a not entirely unpleasant shudder promptly races through you in response.
âAgain? We havenât even finished the first time, sweetheart.â
Summary: Tendou shares everything with Ushijimaâhis food, his dorm room, even the AVs he likes. Why not his girlfriend, too? [Part 2]
A/N: The âyou deserve two boyfriendsâ meme but make it college AU. Y'all donât even know how excited I got about thisâŠitâs embarrassingâŠbut ngl this is the good kush đ
Tags/warnings: college AU, babyâs first poly relationship, soft??, exhibitionism, Tendou is a tiny bit shady with that sharing is caring mentality
They really do share everything, so you guess it makes sense that they end up sharing you.
At firstâmeaning, when you first start dating Tendou and Ushijima is just his intimidatingly hot roommate who seems like heâs constantly glaring at everyoneâyou think itâs weird. They have the same major and every semester when they enroll, Tendou plans their schedules so they can take at least half of their classes together. He texts Ushijima to set up times for lunch and dinner so they can eat in the cafeteria together, they meet up to walk to volleyball practice together, and (even before Tendou brings up the poly thing) Ushijimaâs usually around when youâre with him.
They share stuff, too, not just their schedules. Their dorm suite (which is about 10 times nicer than the regular rooms on the same floorâitâs student athlete privilege, and yes, youâre bitter about it) is littered with items that always seem to fall under collective ownership. Boxes of energy bars and whey protein powder lining up the walls in neat stacks; medals and trophies and flags from high school volleyball; the singular bottle of body wash and the accompanying 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner they keep in their bathroomâall of it belongs to both of them. You ask Ushijima once if thereâs anything he wouldnât share with Tendou, and he has to think for a while before answering.
âMy toothbrush,â he says seriously. âBut if he asked, I would let him use it.â
Theyâre close enough to the same size that they can share clothes sometimes, and since they have a single closet with no system of organization, itâs really hard to tell whose is whose. This gets you in trouble when you start dating Tendouâif you think about it, it might be the reason the three of you ended up together in the first place.
The jersey incident, as you refer to it in your mind later on, occurs a few weeks into your relationship, when Tendouâs at an away game for the weekend and he leaves you a voicemail telling you he misses you. Everythingâs new and shiny and you like hearing that he hates having to be away from you, so you dig his old high school jersey out of the back of his closet for the sole purpose of taking a racy pic to send to him. Itâs gigantic on youâfigures, since Tendou is stupid tall for some reasonâbut you tie up the hem under your tits and let it slip off of your bare shoulders and the effect is pretty cute.
And hey, you figure you may as well go all the way and dress up to cheer your boyfriend on, so you beg your roommate to let you borrow the âslutty cheerleaderâ costume she wore on Halloween: itty bitty pleated white skirt, thigh high socks, hair tied up in pigtails and sparkly white pom-poms to complete the look. You put your camera on auto-timer and take way too many pictures, and when youâre decently satisfied with the results, you send them to Tendou along with your usual good luck, Iâm cheering for you! text before the game.
It takes him about one minute to respond.
> holy fuck (y/n)
> jesus
> r u trying to make me cum in my fucking pants
> Attachment: 1 image
Itâs a blurry selfie of him in his team uniform, substantial dick print clearly visible through the shorts. You flush, grin, and preen at your ability to give your boyfriend a hard-on from hundreds of miles away without even showing that much.
Unfortunately, thatâs not all.
> where did u even get that shirt? u know its wakatoshis not mine right lol
< Wait, are you joking? you ask back, horror dawning on you as you twist around in front of a mirror to check the number on the back. Did you actually just send your boyfriend a sexy picture wearing his roommateâs shirt? You donât want to believe it, but sure enough the back of the jersey reads SHIRATORIZAWA 1. You may be clueless when it comes to volleyball, but youâre pretty certain that 1 is the captainâs number, and Tendou was not the captain of his high school team. Shit!
> ya lmao mines at home, thats definitely wakatoshis
< OMG no!!! please donât tell him đ° You immediately pull the jersey off and bury your face in your pillow as your roommate looks on curiously. Knowing Tendou, youâre never going to live this down.
> dw abt it
> he thinks its hot lol
You can actually feel the blood draining out of your face. < WHAT!! You showed it to him???
> hes sitting right next to međđ dont be mad please baby
< I hate you so much Tendou Iâm seriously going to kill you
> wakatoshi looks all flustered, wanna see?
< No I hate you
Tendou sends the picture anyway. Ushijima does not look flustered in the least. He looks as serious and vaguely annoyed as he does every time you see him, and all you can think about is the fact that your boyfriendâs best friend saw you wearing that stupid cheerleading outfit and his old jersey and he probably thinks youâre a moron.
You refuse to answer any of Tendouâs texts until he comes back and apologizes sincerely. You canât look Ushijima in the eye for way too long. And despite many requests, you absolutely do not let Tendou fuck you in the cheerleader costume.
Weeks laterâagesâyouâre sitting one of the dryers in the laundry room quizzing Ushijima on terms for your upcoming biochem test while he folds his clothes, and you lose your train of thought when you see the accursed Shiratorizawa jersey in his hands. Youâve always felt awkward over that stupid photo, but you decide now is as good a time as any to get it out in the open and lighten the mood.
âHey, do you remember that time I thought that was Tendouâs? You know, when IâŠsent him that picture⊠He said you mightâve seen it by accident.â Your voice trails off, but youâre impressed at how well youâre faking nonchalance.
The dryer churns under your thighs and somewhere behind you thereâs another student humming Kendrick while they fold their clothes. You keep your gaze firmly glued to the flashcards youâre going through so you donât have to make eye contact, but out of the corner of your eye you can see Ushijima stop folding the jersey and look up at you. âAh⊠Tendou showed it to me.â
That little shit. âYeah, sorry about that. I was kinda hoping youâd forgotten by now.â
âI didnât.â
His voice is closer than you thought and you look up reflexively. Ushijima is standing in front of you. Heâs so big, you think despite the fact that this is not exactly a revelation (honestly, you think it every time you see him). His face looks the same as usual, but thereâs a charge in the air. Some kind of tension, the kind youâre used to in different contexts but you barely recognize here because Ushijima is your boyfriendâs roommate.
You know you look like a mess (itâs midterm season and youâre too busy to do your own laundry) and the only reason youâre even here is that you and Ushijima are in the same biochem section and he is 100% definitely going to fail without your help, but somehow all of that falls away and you donât feel like youâre sitting in the basement laundry room with ugly fluorescent lights flickering above you and half a dozen other students milling around. The way Ushijima is looking at you isnât the way a guy looks at âsome girl whoâs dating his friendâ or whatever.
âIâm not going to forget,â he continues.
Heâs watching you like instead of sitting on a dryer in sweats and a dingy old camp t-shirt, youâre wearing the same slutty cheerleader costume from the photo: made up like a beauty queen, pom-poms in hand, tits pushed up against the loose fabric of the jersey youâre wearing thatâs about half a second away from falling off entirely. His jersey. Ushijimaâs eyes move over you and you have to fold your legs and for some reason the thought crosses your mind that heâs about to kiss you, and no, of course that doesnât make sense, but as soon as you think it you canât stop thinking about it.
Heâs going to kiss you. Heâs going to kiss you. Ushijimaâs going to kiss you.
He reaches forward and you shy away at the last secondâonly to feel like an world-class idiot once again when his hand closes around the stack of index cards at your side. âHeterotroph hypothesis,â he says flatly.
You breathe out a quick sigh, trying to feel relieved and not the tiniest bit let down. âUhhâŠearly life formsâsomething about the first life form, right? They couldnât produce their own food, so they were heterotrophsâŠâ
Ushijima flips the card around to read the back. âCorrect.â And thatâs that.
///
You didnât start going out with Tendou thinking that youâd end up in a throuple with the two stars of your collegeâs volleyball team, but honestly, itâs not like there arenât signs.
The jersey incident is the first, unless you count the fact that most of the stuff Tendou invites you to do is stuff heâs already doing with Ushijima. Late night study date at the library? You show up and Tendouâs there with Ushijima already, the two of them claiming an entire 6-person table with their papers strewn out everywhere, disagreeing about the meaning of one of the practice exam answers (theyâre usually both wrong). Coffee date before class? Tendouâs late, but itâs cool because you can tell he literally sprinted to meet you at your favorite bench on campus, bringing with him you the iced coffee you asked for along with his ever-present roommate. It takes some getting used to, but you like Ushijima so you donât mind.
Sometimes you think itâs weird that theyâre friends. Other than being tall and playing volleyball, they really donât have much in common. Ushijima has to be the polar opposite of your goofy, cheerful boyfriend, who canât keep his mouth shut to save his lifeâŠthen again, maybe thatâs why theyâre so close? You know through Tendou that there are a lot of people on the team who respect Ushijima, but it seems like itâd be hard to develop an actual friendship with the guy. Figures that Tendouâwho doesnât give up when heâs interested in someone, as you can attest to firsthandâwould be Ushijimaâs closest and oldest friend.
Theyâre not all different, though. You discover a third similarity between the two of them when you go to their first home game and see them really play for the first time: talent. Itâs crazyâyouâve never been into sports, but you donât need to be to see how good they are at what they do. The ball moves so fast you barely understand whatâs going on, but thereâs no mistaking how often the announcer says each of their names as they score point after point after point.
You learn a lot of things at that match: what a âguess blockerâ is, what Tendouâs face looks like when he scores (itâs pretty similar to his sex faceâis that weird or cute??), and that Ushijima is one of the best spikers in Japan. The way he slams the ball down into the opposing teamâs court doesnât even look real sometimes. You keep wondering if the volleyball is going to pop like a balloon under the force of his hand.
After the match, your voice is hoarse from screaming but you still manage to yell congratulations for your boyfriend when you meet him and Ushijima leaving the locker room in the stadium. Youâre still pumped on the adrenaline of the game, so you donât even protest like you usually would when Tendou picks you up in the middle of your hug and lifts you off the ground effortlessly. âHow was I? Awesome, right? I told you we would beat them!â
âYou did, you so didââ Even though your throat hurts, you canât help gushing about every rally, every soul-crushing block, every impossible spike. ââand then the guy on the left thought he was clear to shoot it but you justââ You throw your arms in the air and mime hitting the ball down like a blocker. âWha-bam!âand the look on his face, I thought he was going to punch you!â
Tendou laughs and lays a sloppy kiss on your cheek, just as thrilled as you are by the win. âYou really liked it that much? I thought you werenât into sports.â
âI loved it! You were so cool! I canât believe Iâm dating someone so cool!â You wrap your legs around his back and hug his face close to yours, reveling in the fact that this weirdo belongs to you wholly and entirely, that you get to have him to yourself (well, other than his roommate). âAnd Iâm not into sports, Iâm into you.â
Tendou smiles in a way that makes the sides of his eyes crinkle up and little red patches bloom over his cheeks, a look that says, I like you so much (Y/N), I like you I like you I like you, except heâs probably trying not to be mushy like that since Ushijima is standing off to the side.
You feel a little bad for ignoring him (no one likes being the third wheel, even if he never seems to care) so when Tendou sets you down you turn to Ushijima. âAnd you! Holy shit, Tendou said you were good, but I didnât know you were that good. It was super loud when you hit the ballâwait, are your hands okay? If I hit something that hard Iâd probably break a finger.â
âMy hands are fineâŠthis is normal for me.â
But just because youâve got them here in front of you and youâre still pumped from the exhilaration of the win, you canât help grabbing Ushijimaâs hand and flipping it palm-up to inspect. True to his word, thereâs no redness, just the calluses heâs built up on his long fingers. âWow.â
âYou donât need to worry about Wakatoshi,â Tendou tells you, grinning and then making a face. âHeâs a monster, he can handle it.â
âNo kidding. Youâre both monsters.â You put the base of your palm up against Ushijimaâs to gauge the size of his hand against yours, and without prompting Tendou grabs your other hand to press against his own. Tendouâs fingers are a bit longer, but Ushijimaâs areâŠthicker, more solid. Your hands look like a little kidâs in comparison. âCan I be honest? Half the time I was thinking I actually feel bad for the other team. If I had to take on both of you at the same time, Iâd probably cry.â
Youâre (mostly) joking, but itâs still a complete shock when you see the side of Ushijimaâs mouth curl up a tiny bit. Youâve known each other for months at this point, but youâve never seen him smile until now. Half of you is wondering if this is some kind of optical illusion caused by the atmosphere and the dim light of the stadium cutting through the evening, but the other half of you enjoys it. You made him smile!
âDonât sell yourself short, (Y/N).â Ushijima says, tipping his head to the side.
âYeahâŠâ Tendou chimes in, resting his chin on top of your head and folding his arms around your neck from his place behind you. âIâm sure you could take both of us. Right, Wakatoshi?â
So thatâs probably a sign.
Itâs not the first. And itâs definitely not the last. Tendou drops plenty of hints that the two of you should actually be the three of you; you just donât get it. You donât even get it when he forgets to lock the dorm room door a few times while the two of you fuck in between classesâheâs got you sitting on his face, whining, whimpering, panting his name while he slithers his long tongue over your clit, and Ushijima justâŠopens the door and walks in.
You tense up, and not just because Ushijima is witnessing what you look like naked and getting ate out like your pussy is a five course meal with extra dessertâyou tense up because youâre about to cum, the kind of climax where you couldnât stop it if you tried. And you try, you try to hold back, you try to lift your soaking wet cunt off of Tendouâs mouth, but your thighs are too weak and anyway heâs holding you down right in place to tongue-fuck you into literal oblivionâ
âso you canât help it, okay? You canât help locking eyes with Ushijima, who looks completely dazed at what he just walked into and you canât help panting out his name because itâs the only fucking thing in your stupid fucking brainâ âUâshiâjiâma?â you gasp, and then youâre squeaking and youâre tipping over that edge and your cunt is quivering around the slick muscle of Tendouâs tongue inside, goddamnit you are going to kill him for not locking that door, except who cares because heâs still licking and youâre writhing in his grip with his fingertips pushing into the fat of your thighs while he keeps you in place, and your boyfriendâs roommate is looking at you!â
And then Ushijima disappears out of the bedroom and you hear the door of the bathroom slam shut. Tendouâs grip eases, and he rolls to the side on his narrow twin bed to make room for you to fall back down flat onto it.
âYouâŠdidnât lock the door.â
âNo way,â he laughs, wiping his mouth. âWakatoshi has a key, yâknow. Itâs his room too.â
The most annoying part is that Tendou does not look the least bit remorseful. You growl and attempt to push him off the edge of the bed with your foot (unsuccessfully). âYou couldâve put a sock on the doorknob! Or texted him!â
âAw, come on. We sexile him so often I feel badâŠI thought heâd be out for longer.â Tendou rubs a circle on your back, still suppressing laughter, but that doesnât help your frayed nerves.
âHe sawâeverything! He totally saw me cum, and I said his freaking nameââ You roll onto your stomach and stuff your face in Tendouâs pillow to muffle a scream. âOh my god. I want to die. I wish we could get struck by lightning right now.â
âItâs okay, babe! Itâs not that big a deal, I promise.â
You glare at Tendou, who inexplicably seems to believe what heâs saying. âShouldnât you be jealous or something? Another guy saw me naked.â
âWellllâŠIâd be jealous if it wasnât Wakatoshi.â
Ugh, what is that supposed to mean? You frown, irrationally annoyed at the implication that Ushijima would have zero interest in your naked body. âYeah, I get it, he doesnât see me like that. But itâs still embarrassing.â
ââŠYou think Wakatoshi doesnât see you like that?â Tendou shifts himself to hover over you, smirking down at your body. âHe went to the bathroom, right? âŠWhat do you think heâs doing in there?â
What is Ushijima doing in the bathroom? You can hear the shower running through the thin wall between the two rooms. Itâs the middle of the day, and he didnât come from the gym. âHeâs showering?â
âHmâŠso Wakatoshi came in and saw youââ Tendou punctuates this with a kiss on the side of your neck and you shudder. âYou, the hottest girl on the fucking planet. Naked. Cumming. And you said his name.â
âUmâit was an accident...â Fuck, you shouldnât be letting Tendou mess around with you while Ushijimaâs probably like six inches away through the wall, but you have a bad habit of getting caught up in Tendouâs pace.
âYou did. You moaned Ushijima all sexyâyou know how sexy your voice sounds when you cum?â Tendou sighs and slides his hand up your inner thigh, hooking it over his hip. âWakatoshi hasnât heard a girl moaning his name in a while. What heâs doing right nowâŠhe probably canât help himself.â
âSo you think heâsââ You bite your lip and squeeze your eyes shut and try to stop yourself from picturing Ushijima in the shower, water dripping over those perfect muscles while heâŠumâŠdoes some self-care. âOh my god.â
âAww, you like that? Me and Wakatoshi both want to fuck youâŠthat makes you horny, yeah?â You can feel Tendou shuffling with his sweatpants and pulling his cock out to line it up with your bare tummy while he layers kisses over your cheeks and gropes one of your tits. âWe should give him something to jack off to⊠I bet he can hear everything. I bet heâs dying to hear what that cute little voice sounds like when my dick is stuffed up you instead of my tongueâŠâ
No. Nope, nope, no way. Tendouâs too fucking good at this. Your pussy is twitchingâdripping your juices sticky all over your thighs, but you also feel like you might spontaneously combust if he keeps talking. âIâI have to go back to my room,â you blurt before you can change your mind.
Tendou blows out a low sigh, then laughs and falls back to the side and pushes his hand through his hair like he never really meant any of it. âIf you insist, princess.â
âYou better apologize to him for me,â you say, rolling your eyes as you wiggle back into the pair of shorts you abandoned on the ground.
âSure, okay. But the optionâs open! Believe me, Wakatoshi wouldnât mind.â
Wouldnât mind what? you think. Somehow the obvious answer escapes you.
That is, until you meet them for dinner a week later (youâve been avoiding Ushijima, and by extension youâve been avoiding your boyfriend too) and Tendou decides that itâs time to be upfront, so as youâre sitting across from them at the booth in the dining hall trying to sneak leftovers into your backpack because youâre running out of meal points, he just comes out and says it.
âSo (Y/N)â have you ever heard of polyamory?â
â [Part 2]
What better way to ring in the new year than with my favourite, degenerate twins. Happy belated new year, y'all <;33
Miya Osamu x female reader x Miya Atsumu
w.c 6.8k
tw: extreme dub-con, themes of infidelity, major character death, smut lite, slight gore/violence, somnophilia if you squint, murder, and, as always, yandere themes
The rain comes heavy, soaking the dirt beneath your bare feet.Â
The cotton of your nightgown, drenched, plastered to your skin, does little to keep the chill of the midnight air from seeping into your bones. Raindrops fall from the leaves of the trees above you, dripping onto your shoulder, clinging to the ends of your hair, your eyelashes.Â
In the mountains, away from the city lights, the night glitters with stars, streaks of soft moonlight spilling through the canopy on clear nights. Tonight, though, with the rain clouds looming ominously overhead, thereâs no light beyond the sole beam of torchlight, steadily making its way closer towards you.
Your toes wriggle in the earth. Run.Â
He calls out your name, twigs snapping in the undergrowth behind you.Â
How⊠how did you get out here?Â
The wind picks up, biting at your soaked, exposed skin. You shiver, and he calls your name again. This time you can hear a note of concern â not quite panic, though. Not yet.Â
Run, that quiet voice urges. Â
You take a step. Anotherâ
And the torchlight finds you. Squinting under the sudden bright light shining on your face, thereâs only a sigh, and the beam shifts downwards.
A familiar countenance peers back at you through the rain; dark hair, grey eyes, a strong jaw. Your husband.Â
âYouâre gonna give me a fucking heart attack oneâa these days, sweetheart,â Osamu says, with a wry sort of laugh. âCâmon, letâs getâcha home.â
Holding an umbrella in one hand and the torch in the other, he passes you the latter so that his arm can snake around your middle, tucking you into his side and out of the rain. Unbothered by the dampness of your skin, he presses a kiss to your temple, his thumb rubbing at your side.
â⊠Iâm sorry,â you mumble, âI donât knowâ I donât rememberââ
He squeezes you side, offers you a crooked smile as he helps you back through the trees. Back home. âItâs fine, the Doc said this could happen, remember?âÂ
You do, vaguely. The Doctor had said a lot that day, most of it lost to the ringing in your ears.Â
Neither of you say much as you make the trek back to the house. Thereâs a gentleness to the way he helps you peel off your sodden nightgown, letting the shower heat up before ushering you in.Â
âIâm sorry,â you tell him again, when he passes you the big, fluffy towel to rub yourself dry.Â
Sorry for causing him to worry. Sorry for making him chase after you in the rain in the middle of the night. Sorry that you canât remember what came before, the life you built with him and all the happiness surrounding it.
You feel like a shell, hollow and useless. You donât know why he keeps putting up with it, and somewhere in the back of your mind, a nasty voice whispers that he wonât for much longer.
But Samu just shakes his head with a snort, âDonât be stupid. Youâre my wife, ya donât apologise for anythinâ.â
You muster a weak smile in return, quickly glancing away. Heâs only being polite, you remind yourself, pulling the towel tighter around yourself. Accident or not, none of this is ideal. Itâs been weeks now, and you havenât gotten better. Your memories are still gone, and no one can tell you with any degree of certainty when or if theyâre going to come back, not to mention that tonight officially marks the third time youâve wandered off in your sleep.
What if your memories donât come back? What if you never return to the person you used to be?Â
Before this you had a family, friends, a history. Likes, dislikes, funny stories from your childhood and weird habits. The things that shape who you are from where youâve been. Youâre just supposed to slide back into the life you had, but how can you when you donât know who that person was?
What kind of man would wantâ
âHey,â he says, catching your jaw to coax your face back up. Grey eyes appraise you, a frown pulling at his features. âI mean it. None of this is your fault. Not the accident, or your memories, the sleepwalking, none of it. And Iâm not going anywhere either, alright?â
He holds your gaze, surveying you intently until you bob your head in agreement.Â
âGood girl. Now are ya cominâ back to bed or are ya planning on leavinâ your poor husband high and dry for a second time tonight?â
Your cheeks heat, the heaviness between you easing somewhat as amusement dances across his face. Heâs handsome, almost intimidatingly so â striking features and excellent bone structure. Something coils in your stomach as the weight of his gaze bores into you. Taking your face in his palms, his thumb brushes along the curve of your cheekbone. Slowly.Â
Your mouth parts then, but whatever response you have is lost as his lips descend on yours, kissing you deeply.Â
When he pulls away, when youâre breathless and slightly dazed, satisfaction and more than a touch of pride gleams from his expression.
âThough we might have to invest in some better locks. Donât want ya wandering off too far on me.â
â
Sometimes it feels like youâre waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under you.
As if youâve woken in someone elseâs life, or a dream, and itâs only a matter of time before it all comes crashing down and youâre whisked away back to reality. A handsome, devoted husband, not one but two houses â the mountainside retreat youâre staying at while you get better, and a place in the city you havenât yet seen â even the ring on your finger, the bright, sparkling diamond that sits next to your platinum wedding band.Â
How can it be real?Â
He tells you that the two of you work together in his restaurant back home, and that too sounds sweet in an oddly domestic way.
And looks can be deceiving, you know that. Money, success, the image of a perfectly happy couple, it doesnât mean anything. Façades can crack, rot can fester beneath the surface, slowly eating away.Â
Everything he tells you sounds so⊠good.
Youâre happy. In love. Fulfilled with your job and comfortable enough financially for the both of you to take the time off while youâre still trying to fix the broken pieces of yourself.
Accident aside, no one gets everything they want. Surely no one can be this happy.Â
Thereâs a niggling sense of unease that bites and gnaws. No one can be this happy.Â
Thereâs a woman who keeps calling Osamuâs phone. You know because those are the calls he lets ring out, ignoring them until he thinks youâre asleep or busy, distracted by whatever task heâs set you on for the day.Â
He calls her Hikari. No, thatâs not entirely true now, is it â he calls her Kari.Â
âKari, you know I wanna be there, but I canât. Things are justâ itâs not a good time right now, sâall.â
And the house is quiet enough that you can hear her desperate sniffles on the other end of the line, âSamu, please, this is important. I need you back here.â
He huffs, running a hand through his sleep mussed hair, pacing the length of the living room. âI canât,â he repeats. âIâm sorry, I am, but after everythinâ⊠itâs too much.â
She cries again, and itâs a strange thing but your heart squeezes in response. She sounds so broken, so lost and scared, a fragile, pitiable thing. â⊠I know⊠â her voice trembles, âDespite what happened, I know you still care about her. I need you to come back. Please, Samu.â
You slip away then, unable to bear it anymore.
Sliding back beneath the covers of your bed, you let out the shuddering breath youâd been holding, trying to process the conversation youâd overheard.Â
There were perhaps other explanations beyond an affair, but as you lie there, mulling it over, none come to mind. If she were a friendâ
âI know you still care about her.â
No. Youâre not that naive. Maybe you were before the accident, or maybe you had suspicions, hell, maybe youâd physically caught him in the act â you suppose none of that matters anymore, does it? All that matters is what youâre going to do with this new development.
And as your husband returns a few minutes later, crawling into bed beside you, an arm hooked over your waist, the warmth of his muscular frame pressed up against your back chasing away the winter chill, you wonder if he sees this as some kind of atonement.
Osamu exhales, nuzzling closer in an effort to get more comfortable, and amidst the strange heaviness in your chest, you close your eyes and will yourself back to sleep.Â
â
If Osamu knows that you eavesdropped on his call last night, he gives no indication come morning. Although, admittedly, that might be because of your visitor.
The day the Doctor came to the house, heâd said a lot about what was happening to you. A result of head trauma, there was no telling if or when your memories might return.Â
Heâd spoken to Osamu, taking your concerned looking husband aside just before heâd left.
âWhat did he say?â youâd asked when heâd returned dutifully to your side.
He hadnât answered straight away, choosing instead to reach out and take your hand in his. For a moment, his focus remained on your entwined fingers, and then heâd said, âTo take things slow. Too many people, too much it might⊠might overwhelm ya. Until things are better, itâs best if itâs just you ân me.â
Today, apparently, marked a change to that, because his twin brother was arriving to stay for a little while.Â
Which, shortly after mid morning, he does.Â
Naturally, youâve seen pictures, you and the twins back in highschool, posing with a friend of theirs, grinning toothily and laughing at the camera. Seeing the two of them in person, though â itâs a whole other ball game.
Next to each other, theyâre a mirror image, but⊠not. Tiny, subtle differences that weirdly make them appear more similar than less. It doesnât make any sense at all, and yet you have no other way of explaining it.Â
Osamu stands at your side, his arm slung over your shoulder as his brother pulls up front in a fancy, fast looking car. Atsumu, however, pays him no mind, eyes â a few shades browner than his brotherâs â fixed solely on you, a familiar, smirking grin broadening across his handsome visage.
Osamu tells you that the three of you are close, yet with only a faint, glimmering recognition and your husbandâs words to fall back on, itâs hard to know how youâre supposed to greet someone you once knew and loved.
With an arm loosely wrapped around your front, you settle for a smile.Â
Atsumu notes this with a raised eyebrow. âAw, câmon now, that ainât no way to greet your favourite twin, is it?â
Before you can stop him heâs on you, yanking you away from Osamu so he can pick you up into a near crushing hug, spinning you around for good measure. You shriek and bury your face in his neck, clinging to him while he laughs, eventually setting you down on wobbly feet.
âFuck, I missed you,â he says, ignoring Samuâs disapproving scowl in favour of taking you in, hands settling on your waist. And there must be some giveaway, a hesitance he notes because his demeanour turns curious, head tilting to the side, âStill nothinâ, huh?â
You shake your head, shrugging. âSorry.â
Feels like thatâs all youâre capable of saying lately.Â
âNah, donât be. Not your fault.â
While you donât necessarily agree â itâs hard not to think of any of this as some kind of moral failing, as though the only reason you canât recover those precious memories is because youâre simply not trying hard enough â itâs⊠nice having someone else around to help fill in the gaps a little.
Not that you arenât endlessly grateful to Osamu â more than you actually know how to convey to him, and you have tried. Itâs just that when you woke up in an unfamiliar bedroom, being watched over by a man you didnât recognise, and with no memories of who you were or what had happened, you hadnât reacted well.
Being your husband (the issue of fidelity aside), heâs supposed to be the person who matters the most to you, and you assume thatâs a two way street. In a sense, forgetting him is its own kind of betrayal, with that comes the heaviness of expectations and fears and awfulness.
Plus, things have been⊠strained between you two, lately.Â
So yes, having Atsumu here as a sort of buffer between you two is a relief. Having someone else to help fill in the gaps in your life, to tell you about the person you used to be â the one youâre trying to fit back into â even more so.
âThat year we made it all the way to the finals before gettinâ knocked out.â
His finger draws across the picture; the volleyball team, sweaty and defeated, bowing before the roaring crowd. All these years later, now a pro playing in arguably one of the best teams in the country (according to him), a two-time Olympic medalist, and he still sounds pissed about it.
You bite back a giggle, following when he turns the page of the year book. âI dunno, second in the nation when youâre still in high school doesn't sound too bad to me.â
âYou were there that day.âÂ
Glancing up, you find Osamu considering the two of you from the kitchen, elbow deep in food prep for dinner. âI was?â
He nods. âYeah. Ya came to all our games, right from the start.â
âThere,â Atsumu taps on the next page, a picture of a younger you cheering wildly from the stands, hands cupped around your mouth to amplify your shouts, maroon ribbons in your hair. âOur cute little cheerleader.â
âWe begged ya to become our manager, but ya kept turninâ us down,â Samu adds, then smirks, âSaid you couldnât stand being around Tsumu for another ten hours a week.â
The dig reaches its mark, Atsumu sneering as he flips Samu the bird, while his other arm slides from the backrest of the couch to drape over your shoulders. You hardly notice, utterly transfixed by the book on Tsumuâs lap. You donât think youâll ever get over how weird it is to be seeing these pictures, like peering into some alternate universe; you, but not you. You look happy, though.
It makes your heart ache a little.
Did you like sports, or was it more of a school pride sort of thing, you wonder. Or was it them â him, really â who drew you into it? If you watched a game now, would you feel anything, some glint of recognition? Excitement?
Flipping the page, you study the various pictures until one in particular catches your eye â only after a second glance. To be fair, the photo isnât of you â well, it is, but youâre not the focus. Rather itâs of two girls who appear to be in the same year as you, posing cutely with each other on the schoolâs courtyard. Behind them, though, in the background thereâs a wooden picnic bench in the shade of an oak. Perched cross-legged atop it, sitting amongst piled up books and notes, thereâs you â and youâre not alone.
Shoulders back, eyes closed, soaking in the rays of the sun filtering through the leaves sits another boy. Not Osamu, one of his teammates, a dark haired kid you recognise from a bunch of the old photos theyâd shown you.
The image itself might not be so remarkable â youâre not doing anything all that interesting, one of a number of people captured in the background, and slightly out of focus at thatâ if not for the one tiny detail that has a strange feeling racing through your heart.
Barely visible but for the way you study it, your hand is curled in his.Â
ââ listeninâ?â
âHuh?â
Mid-way through scraping out his rice, Osamu fixes you with an odd expression. Atsumu, however, just snickers and flicks your forehead. âYa always were a little spacey.â
Halfheartedly, you chuckle along with him.
The smart thing to do â perhaps the right thing â would be to leave it.Â
Samu told you the two of you dated right through high school, so it canât be anything like that. Thereâs a possibility the two of you were just close. Good friends, judging by how often he appears in the photos with you and the twins. Heâd told you your parents, the only family you had, died in an accident years ago, but Samu hasnât really spoken much about your friends. You know why, and understand it to an extent â he doesnât want to stress you out unnecessarily, not while youâre still so fragile.
âThe doc said we gotta take things slow, baby.â
Nevertheless, your lips part, the question burning on the tip of your tongueâ
Suddenly, as has become a frequent occurrence in the past few days, Osamuâs phone blares to life, the loud vibrations against the marble countertop startling all three of you.Â
He doesnât answer it, by this point you no longer expect him to.Â
â
You dream of fingers running through dark hair, of lips smiling lazily. Someone laughing, âYouâre an idiot.â
Thereâs a warmth, a slow burning heat that ignites in your body, trailing from your jaw, down the slope of your neck, dancing along delicate collarbone, another unfurling deep within your core. You chase the pleasant sensations, a soft, pretty moan drawn from parted lips.Â
Only when teeth bite down, a tender nip to sensitive flesh are you roused from your dreams to find your husband straddling you, his mouth now between your breasts, dark eyes that glint in the low morning light taking in your visage as you slowly come to.Â
âS-Samu, whaââ
âShh.â He chuckles, your stomach flipping at the deep rumble, âRelax. Gonna make ya feel good, baby.â
Whatever protests you might have (if you have any at all) are lost when you realise that the heat pooling in your guts is due to the two digits Osamu has curled up inside of you, slowly easing in and out.
It isnât the first time the two of you have been intimate since the accident, and while you hadnât fought him those times either, thereâs a slight niggling sensation, nearly lost to the burgeoning pleasure, that twists and knots at the thought of whatâs to come.
Thereâs no possible way of knowing how often youâve had sex with each other in the years youâve been together. For him, this must be old hat. For you though, with no frame of reference, no past partners to call to mind, thereâs an edge of vulnerability you wish you could get rid of.
A hesitance you donât give a voice to â not that Samu offers you much of an opening to do so.Â
Pushing up the hem of your nightdress, your husband lifts your hips enough to ease off your panties, dragging them slowly down smooth legs until theyâre dangling from one ankle, and you kick them aside.
Spreading them either side of his broad frame, Osamu stands briefly to rid himself of his own underwear, crawling on all fours back between your legs â gripping one thigh to sink his teeth into soft, delectable flesh â his tongue quick to soothe the hurt when you cry out.
âA-Atsumu, heâs gonna wake up,â you murmur as he once more takes you by the waist, hefting you forward so that you lie flush against him, your legs hiked up over his hips.Â
The very last thing you want right now is an audience.
With one hand, he strokes his cock with the fingers that had been buried inside your pussy, spreading the glistening mix of your slick and his pre over the thick member. The otherâs planted near your shoulder, keeping him stable while he rolls his hips forward, slowly bullying his cock into your warm, tight little cunt. Osamu grins roguishly, lowering his top half down to hover above you as you fist at the sheets, your spine arcing, ankles locking over his back.
âMaybeââ he grunts, relishing in the sounds of your sweet cries and gasps as he inches his way into stuffing you full. âMaybe I want him to hear.â
â
A heavy weight drops onto the couch beside you. âSomethinâ on your mind, sweetheart?â
You fiddle with the rings on your left hand. How many times now have you caught yourself toying with them, completely lost in contemplation, their weight on your finger almost foreign?Â
A few times now youâve taken them off to wash up and forgotten about them entirely, not noticing their absence until Samu himself comes to take your hand in his and slide them back on.Â
Did you used to do that before the accident?
No⊠no, you probably spent days marvelling at them, wiggling your fingers to make the diamond sparkle in the light. You were probably enthralled by the pretty thing. Blissfully in love.Â
Happy.
âI think Osamuâs cheating on me.â
You donât dare raise your eyeline when you say it, afraid of what youâll see. You might be his wife, however poor a job youâre currently doing, yet the one person Osamuâs closest to is undeniably his brother.Â
Since Tsumu arrived three days ago, all theyâve done is bicker between themselves, and yet without either of them saying as much, the writingâs on the wall. Itâs in the looks they share, full of silent conversations youâre not privy to and wonât ever have a hope of understanding. In the way they move around each other, that implicit, frankly unnerving trust they have with one another.Â
There are things Osamu canât share with you â or wonât, maybe â but thereâs not a doubt in your mind that if Samu were sleeping with somebody else, if he loved them as he claimed to love you, Atsumu knows about it.
Itâs not confirmation that youâre searching for, though. You doubt heâd admit it to begin with â between you and Samu, thereâs no question of which side his loyalty falls. This isnât about that.
For days now, weeks, youâve had this gnawing pit in your stomach that keeps getting worse, and worse and worse.Â
With each day that passes, you should be making some kind of progress towards regaining your memories or, if not that, then at the very least becoming more comfortable around him. Yet you still feel like a stranger inhabiting this body, and to make matters worse, your marriage might be failing before you can try to adjust yourself to it.Â
Atsumuâs really the last person you should be saying this to. Itâs the sort of thing you accidentally let slip to a friend after one too many glasses of wine, letting them comfort you and offer advice, commiserate, even.
Yet Samu wonât so much as bring up the friends you had before for fear of making things worse â because youâre fragile and weak, and you havenât shown any signs of getting better. From the complete and utter radio silence on their ends, you can only assume none of them bothered to fight him on it.Â
Again, rationally speaking you can understand it â that doesnât mean it doesnât sting in its own bitter way.
Beside you, Atsumu laughs. Actually laughs.Â
Indignation â hurt â burns, heating your cheeks as your hands curl into pathetic little fists in your lap and shake. Much to your dismay, tears prickly uncomfortably at your waterline. You go to say something, only for a lump to settle in your throat, blocking all noise. You didnât think heâd spill the truth just like that, but to laugh at you?
In a split second decision you start to rise, planning on stalking off to go lick your wounds alone in your bedroom until Samu comes home, when a hand on your shoulder stops you.
He chuckles again when heâs met with your poisonous glare, âHey, câmon. Donât run away, I wasnât laughinâ atcha.â
Raising an eyebrow, you scoff. His lips curl into a smirk, hands coming up in a peaceful gesture. âOkay, okay, I was but⊠sâjust funny to me that you think Samuâd ever look twice at another girl. Heâs been in love with ya pretty much from day one.âÂ
The words should be more of a reassurance than they are. Your shoulders rise and fall, a tight shrug as your gaze dips once more to your lap, to the rings that shine mockingly on your left hand.Â
Atsumu, however, isnât so willing to drop the subject.Â
âNah, you donât get to say some wild shit like that ân then go all quiet on me. Explain.â
If you got up and left, would he follow you? Probably, you muse. If anything, Atsumuâs proven over the past few days that heâs nothing if not persistent. Heâs clearly amused, at your expense, mind you, yet the way he scrutinises you now, the slight narrowing of his eyes, that reminds you of a dog with a bone.Â
No, he wonât let this go.
Nibbling at your bottom lip, you shrug again, âThereâs this girlâ woman, I guess. She keeps calling him⊠Samu wonât talk to her if Iâm around.â You swallow tightly, âIâI overheard them, the last time she rang, andâŠâÂ
âWhatâd ya hear?â
You fiddle with the hem of your skirt as that tell tale prickle stings at your tear ducts. After your early morning tumble in the sheets, youâd thought that things mightâve been different between you two. But Samu still left, some hollow excuse about running errands, and all you can think is that heâs with her now, that whatever you gave wasnât enough andâ
âLook at me.â Atsumuâs no longer laughing. If anything, he actually looks mildly pissed off by the whole thing, his jaw tightening even as he tries for a reassuring smile, scooching closer and touching your shoulder again, âWhat did she say to him?â
âShe told him she needed him, begged him to come home.â Your voice breaks, just as the dam to your tears do, tumbling down your cheeks as your shoulders shake and crumple inwards.Â
Atsumu runs his tongue over his teeth before muttering a quiet curse, and you suppose that thatâs confirmation enough. Without a word he pulls you into his arms, your face held to his chest while he strokes your back and you cling to him in turn, letting all the frustration and grief and confusion of the past few weeks spill out of you in horrid, trembling cries.Â
You donât know how long you sit there, half cradled in Atsumuâs lap before he finally speaks, âI donât care what ya heard. Samu loves you more than anythinâ, we both do. He ainât gonna throw that away for nobody.â
Drawing back, he takes your cheek in one hand, cupping it in his palm, the broad pad of his thumb sweeping away the remnants of your tears with a tenderness that near breaks your heart.Â
âI mean it,â he says. Youâre close enough that the warmth of his breath tickles your skin, that you can count every last one of his eyelashes. Your stomach flutters. âYou mean everything to us. Nothinâs gonna get in the way of that.â
And before you can stop him, before you can blink, Atsumuâs closing the gap between you, his lips meeting yours.Â
Like a computer short circuiting, thereâs nothing you can do but freeze and falter as he kisses you, wholly unbothered by your lack of participation. His lips are surprisingly soft, warm as they move against yours, and while his tongue brushes along your lower lip, he makes no real effort to deepen it, seemingly content with the contact he has.Â
Your heart pounds against your ribcage so violently that it drowns out all other noise. Your stomach twists, flips, churning as he moans softly into your mouth, but for the life of you, you canât move, canât stop this. Youâre frozen. Shellshocked. Only when Atsumu breaks away, pupils dilated, eyes slightly glazed over, wearing a stupid, self satisfied little grin do you finally gain control over your body again.
By that point, heâs already shifting to settle you back on the couch, rising himself. âSamu and I love ya. We arenât goinâ anywhere, stop worrying your pretty little head about it, yeah?â
And then heâs walking away, whistling as he goes.
â
A little while later, Atsumu calls out that heâs going for a run. You donât acknowledge it.Â
The front door opens. Closes. The sun moves across the sky, minutes tick by, and eventually he returns, sweaty and panting, popping his head in the door to make sure youâre right where he left you.
The whole time you sit stationary on your bed, staring vacantly out the window to the forest that lies beyond. Numb, just numb.
âGonna go have a shower, then I think you ân me should talk before Samu gets back.â He waits and you donât acknowledge him. Shrugging off his shirt, something wicked enters his expression, âUnless ya wanna come join me?â
That, finally, gets a reaction; your head jerking back to regard him with wide, scandalised eyes, âWhat?â
He winks, snickers when your gaze drops briefly below his shoulders, eyeing his muscular chest, the well defined planes of his stomach. A bead of sweat rolls from his neck, you track its path with a rapt focus, down to his navel, the smattering of hair there, the cut of the V shaped muscles that draw your attention towardsâÂ
Abruptly, you force your attention upwards, cheeks burning as blood rushes to your face.
Atsumu, grinning smugly, missed none of it. âNext time, then.â
And with that, he waltzes off, leaving the door ajar.
⊠What the hell?
What the actual fuck?
Head reeling, you have no idea how youâre supposed to process this sudden shift in⊠well, everything. Had this â you and Atsumu â happened before? Did Osamu know about it?Â
Were you cheating, too?Â
Was that what your relationship with Osamu was; two deeply unhappy people screwing countless others to avoid fixing whatever it was that festered between them.
Your mind jumps to the picture youâd seen in the year book, you and that boy on the picnic bench, your hand wrapped around his. Osamu told you that youâd been dating ever since your high school days, had you been unfaithful that whole time â spreading your legs for his friends and brother until he gave up trying to be loyal in return?
You feel sick at the thought.Â
What other option is there, though? What explanation? Either Atsumuâs being particularly cruel and messing with you, or he isnât and youâre apparently more than okay fucking not only your husband but his brother as well.
âDespite what happened, I know you still care about her.â Hikariâs words ring mockingly in your head. All this time youâve been so bent out of shape over the idea of Osamu with another woman, and itâs now occurring to you that maybe you mightâve been the one to drive him to it.
Despite what happened.
You draw in a shuddering breath, you bring a hand to your lips, either to stifle a sob or to keep yourself from throwing up, youâre not entirely sure which.Â
And as the sound of running water filters through the room, so too does a sense of calm clarity.Â
For weeks now youâve been trying to make this work, trying to slip back into the person you were, a life that you donât truly remember.
And it isnât working.Â
You still donât feel normal around Osamu. You donât remember anything, and despite what youâd been told from the start â despite fighting it every step of the way â you have to accept the possibility that that might not change.
Your spine straightens, the grip you have on the duvet easing as you take another, calmer breath in, letting it fill your lungs and clear your head.
The answerâs been staring you in the face this whole time. If you canât find your way back to the life you led before you got hurt, perhaps rather than clinging to a past that doesnât truly belong to you anymore, itâs time you cut it loose and walk away.
A clean break doesnât sound like such a bad idea when the current situation promises nothing but messiness, hurt and heartbreak for everyone involved.
Even if the thought of going it alone is a terrifying one.Â
Even if it means leaving the one â now two, you suppose â people who stood by your side in the aftermath behind.
And as if the universe senses the tumultuousness inside your head, the sharp, trilling sound of a ringtone shatters it, snapping you out of your thoughts and back into the moment.Â
You figure that it must be Atsumuâs phone and despite being startled, youâre content to let it ring out â after all, itâs not your phone, not your business.Â
Atsumuâs a professional athlete, an incredibly successful one at that, there could be any number of important people on the other end of the line, and if itâs critical, whoever it is can leave a message. Youâre not his receptionist.
After a few seconds, the ringing stops. And begins again.
Frowning, you push yourself up from the bed, heading towards the dining room. Atsumuâs still in the shower, you can hear the faucet running, your only thought is that if itâs Samu and itâs something urgent, he wonât mind.Â
Except when you find it, lit up and vibrating on the kitchen bench, the caller ID isnât his twinâs. Again, the ringing stops, and again, after a short beat, it begins anew.Â
The picture that fills the screen is of a pretty girl with dimples, her arms looped around a familiar looking brunet.
Not Osamu, but the boy from the yearbook. Older, of course, smiling lazily at the camera while she pokes her tongue out and throws up two peace signs.Â
Little Suna, the caller ID tells you, and in brackets next to a sun emoji; Hikari.
Your heart squeezes, a thick lump settling in your throat as you survey the image of the two of them. But it isnât dismay, or the hurt youâd felt earlier when Osamu was hiding her. You canât put a finger on what it is exactly, only that looking at that picture fills you with an incomprehensible and near overwhelming sense of grief, like someoneâs clawed their way into your chest, taken your still beating heart in their hand and slowly, agonisingly, ripped it from you.
Without consciously choosing to do so, you slide the little bar across, answering the call and clicking on the speaker icon.
âH-hello?â
The silence youâre met with is heavy. Pregnant. Why did you pick up? Why the hell did you answer?! Panic and common sense sets in and you silently curse yourself for being so stupid, your finger moving to hurriedly tap the end call button.Â
And then you hear her gasp, a tiny, sharp little thing that spears right through you. Hikari stutters your name, âYou⊠Whaâ they⊠they found you?â
She starts to laugh then, or maybe sheâs sobbing, itâs difficult to tell exactly.Â
âYouâre okay?â she asks, the sound muffled by choked, ragged noises. âOh my god, I canât believe youâre okay! A-after they found Rin, I-I thoughtââ
White noise drowns her out.
⊠Rin.
RinâŠtaro.Â
Suna.
Your knees go weak, giving way beneath you. Pain sings through your kneecaps as they collide with the wooden floorboards, but itâs nothing compared to the agony that overtakes your chest, spreading with every beat of your frantic heart until itâs the only thing you can feel, and you cling to it. Desperate. Gasping.
Thereâs a frantic noise somewhere, Hikari calling your name; itâs lost to the pounding haze. Nothing more than the buzz of a gnat flittering around your head.
Every thought eddies from your head, only him. Only that name; Suna Rintaro.
And suddenlyâ
âYouâre an idiot, you know?â
You laugh, throwing an arm around his shoulder as you wriggle your fingers in front of his face, admiring the sparkling ring. âBut itâs so pretty, donât you think? It suits me.â
He raises an unimpressed eyebrow when you turn to cheekily grin at him, âConsidering I was the one who picked it, yeah, that was kind of the idea.â
Giggling, you stretch up on your tippy toes to press a kiss to his cheek.
âŠâŠâŠ
âGin canât make it. Somethinâ about his girlfriend and the baby,â Rin mutters, appearing in the doorway of your bedroom. âSo itâll just be us and the twins, I guess.â
âWell geez, no need to sound too excited about it,â you say, eyeing your boyfriend â fiancĂ© now, you have to keep reminding yourself â from the mirror as you battle with the clasp of your necklace. âItâs fine, weâll see him when we see Kita and the others next month.â
A few seconds pass with no sign of victory, and Rin rolls his eyes, âLet me.âÂ
He comes up behind you, taking the delicate gold chain from your fingers and nimbly clasping it shut in what feels like a mockery of your struggles. Adjusting the pendant so that it falls better, he exhales, letting his arms fold loosely around you, his chin coming to a rest atop your head.Â
The faint crease between his brows, the set of his jaw â to anyone else he might appear bored, annoyed even. You arenât so easily fooled. You know Rin, know better than to push. Itâs not hard to guess whatâs bothering him, though. âYou think itâll be weird?â
He doesnât say anything for a moment. Then he shrugs, âI think itâll be weirder without Gin.â
âIt was years ago, theyâve both moved on â a long, long time ago. Theyâre our friends, Rin. The only thing theyâre gonna be is happy for us.â
âŠâŠâŠ
A hand covering your mouth, another roughly shaking your shoulder, rousing you from sleep. âShh, shh, itâs just me. Thereâs someone in the house,â Rinâs voice whispers in your ear. âGet under the bed and donât make a sound, okay? Iâll be right back.â
âRinââ
âNot a fucking sound!â he hisses, and quietly slips from the bed. As if on cue, a loud shattering noise cuts through the room, and terror, absolute terror, grips you. You do as he bids, limbs shaking and clumsy, the sound of every breath enhanced in the quiet stillness Rintaro leaves behind. You clamp a hand over your mouth to try and muffle it.
You wait, and wait, trembling in the darkness.
And then a crash, heavier than the last one. Rintaroâs yelling, more voices raised, more muted thumps, grunting and howling bellows of agony that have every hair on your body standing on end, and abruptlyâ
Silence.
It rings in your ear, echoing.
Your pulse thunders, every beat of your heart pumping a paralysing mix of fear and panic through your body. Youâre shaking like a leaf, tears streaming down your cheeks as you try â try so desperately â not to make a noise like Rin told you to.
The footsteps that approach have your blood running cold, and you squeeze your eyes shut, wheezing terrified breaths as you choke back sobs and pray that they wonât find you.Â
You arenât that lucky.
You arenât that quiet.
They stop at the foot of the bed. Two of them. One bends down, a hand finding your ankle and with a snickering laugh, yanks you out into the open.Â
You scream and fight against the figures clad head to toe in black, thrashing like a wild thing for all the good that it does you. Youâre determined not to go easy â at least, not until they carry you out past the living room, the mess they left there.
Rin, but not Rin. Not with his face brutalised like that, his skull all caved in, limbs broken and splayed out all wrong.
No.
No, no, no, no.
One eye, empty and lifeless, staring backâ
Itâs too much.
You blink, jerking back to the present with a heaving gasp. Glancing up, your gut tightens into a knot as two things become starkly apparent.Â
One; Osamuâs finally returned, standing half frozen in the doorway, appraising you with an uncharacteristically cold expression.
Two; itâs deathly quiet. Turning your head, you find that the call with Kariâs gone silent, a shirtless Atsumu, hair damp, a towel wrapped dangerously low around his hips, gripping his phone, jaw tightly clenched.
It twists into an awful sort of forced grin when he notices youâve come back to them.Â
âI really, really wish ya hadnât done that, baby.â