Do you guys want to see something dumb I made at 1AM last night
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i love it when characters are codependent. i love it when losing someone feels like losing a limb. i love it when two people "complete" each other so wholly and terribly that one can barely function without the other. i love it when the fear of losing the only person who understands them is so all-consuming they'll destroy anything to stay together, including themselves.
When writing always remember… a character flaw is only a flaw until becomes useful.
Is your protagonist manipulative? Well that’s awful… until they manipulate the antagonist into making a decision that saves the lives of their friends.
Is your protagonist a skeptic? Well that’s not good… until someone tries to lie to them.
Is your protagonist overprotective? That sucks… until someone they love is in danger.
Is your protagonist remorseless? Well that makes them pretty unlikeable… until a hard decision has to be made.
As I mentioned earlier, there will be spoilers! You can skip this if want to experience the game for yourself. Also, feel free to correct me for any mistakes.
Part 2 ┃ Part 3 ┃ Part 4 ┃ Part 5 ┃ Part 6┃ Part 7 ┃ Part 8 Part 9 ┃Part 10┃ Part 11/Finale
The game starts off with Eddie and his brothers playing hide and seek in the cemetery. The brothers ask him why he doesn’t play hide and seek with them and he simply responds because he has the graves to take care of (what a hard worker he is!). One of the brothers tells him that maintenance is already over and Eddie is having none of it. To him graves come first.
After playful teasing and Eddie asking his brother who’s in the grave, the game takes us to our first save. For some reason it wouldn’t let me save the game, until I read the instructions that is (you have to copy the folder from the disc onto your desktop). The game at this point takes a more sinister/dark tone, the music is a bit creepy here with bird chirping in the background. Little brother tells Eddie that the girl in the grave is a child and that she’s very cute, about the same age as brother George (how many brothers does Eddie have?).
Then we are presented with choices (first decision making, folks). How do you want the grave to be? I chose small and wonderful since the girl is…well a child. Eddie seems to agree with my choice and is happy then proceeds to ask his brother why did the child die. Little brother tells him that she was found dead in the woods and probably fell off a cliff after chasing something, a cute animal maybe? She did love cute things after all according to him anyway.
Eddie and his family seem to be animal lovers and we are then presented with the second choice. He seems to want to decorate the gravestone in the shape of an animal. It gives you three options: Bear, Unicorn, and Wolf. I chose unicorn (don’t fight me on this, guys, it’s a little girl! xD)
They proceed to talk about what she was wearing. A dress with a heart decoration on it perhaps? But when her corpse was found, her whole body was covered in blood. Eddie says the burial dress is plain and he does not like her like that (Eddie why?!)
He wants to keep adding more to the grave. I think this is an option for the burial dress pattern. For this one I chose a flower. Eddie asks if that is too common/plain and little bro replies that it should be different (I went with the wrong answer.) The correct answer is the first option (a shooting star?) correct me if I’m wrong as I am a bit confused with this one.
And with that our unicorn gravestone is complete and little brother seems impressed and happy with it! Eddie replies that it is perfect for the little girl and hopes she will rest well in her new grave. I will end part 1 now. Eddie’s father will make an appearance in part 2.
I do have thoughts on how the situation between Mu and Haruka is being discussed.
I believe it's a bit disingenuous to behave as though Mu didn't know Haruka was getting worse and I just want to lay out why it is I feel that way. To be frank it simply doesn't align with anything we heard from Mu in her second voice drama or the things she was displayed as saying and doing within the Portal Timeline. As I am a petty individual I would say it's a stretch of canon to say she did anything other than what she said she'd do.
Which was nothing but support Haruka in his choice as his friend,
Mu Queen B 13:16
"Isn't it exactly because he's my friend? isn't friendship about letting your friends do the stuff they want?"
Though let's go a bit further back for a second how do we know that Mu was aware Haruka was planning to do something that would end his life? Well because she told us and she told us a good while ago in fact,
Mu Queen B 12:36s,
"Ah, but if you don't forgive me Haruka-kun will die. So, I think it'd be best not to do that." ...! [bell tolls] So you've heard about that nonsense too? "Mhm. Haruka-kun told me."
Literally her saying that last thing should be the nail in the coffin for presenting this situation as something Mu wasn't aware of. Because she was told by Haruka himself that if she was voted Guilty he would do lethal harm to himself. This is the first reason why I believe anyone behaving as though there is any chance Mu did not know Haruka planned to do this is either acting dishonestly or simply has not been paying attention.
Well, Gunsli maybe she knew he planned to harm himself but she didn't know how he was going to do it. Haruka didn't even know himself yet he was still trying to figure it out. That's fair. However, Mu still could have told the other prisoners that Haruka planned to do harm to himself just to be safe if she didn't want him to do that or just told him she didn't want him to do that. I guess that's neither here or there though.
Let's just keep walking down this-
Wow; I literally can't even say this is a road, bridge or anything someone is meant to walk on... What the fuck is this? Alright. This imaginary pathway certain people insist on telling those around them really exists despite it not aligning with anything that has occurred thus far. Yeah, I'll believe for a second this is the case and Mu just didn't know even though Haruka told her he would end his life if she was guilty and she would be the first to know if she was guilty.
Not even touching on the landmine of how Haruka would find out she was guilty to begin with. It was possibly when they were restrained after the verdicts but he implies he knew earlier than that when they're talking in the timeline on his birthday in 2023.
Still forgetting all of that maybe Mu didn't know how Haruka would do it.
She still knew he had the intent to harm himself and what her verdict was to her own admission. Then did nothing to even try to dissuade him from harming himself over the course of the portal timeline,
Trial Three Website Voice Lines
2: "You said you’d forgive me. You told me that you would forgive me! Just changing what you think on a whim, you really are the worst." 4: "What are you going to do about this? Haruka-kun died. Hey, guard. You knew this would happen, right?""
The first time she brought him food she even stated that he had to eat it properly meaning she recognized he was not eating and persisted in telling people she had it handled anyway and that he was fine,
23/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Mu: Haruka-kun, I brought your food. Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing? Haruka: ……ah, thank you very much. Mu-san. Sorry, um…… I…… Mu: You shouldn’t just lock yourself in your room all day. You have to eat your food properly. Hm, well…… I do understand why you’re feeling down. It feels bad. The atmosphere recently Haruka: Um, I’m totally fine…… Just a bit, I’m thinking, about how to do it. What to do, what to do, to…… fulfil my promise. For Mu-san’s sake……
So, even the fact that he was not eating properly was something she knew long before any of the other prisoners or even us as the audience knew.
Hell, in this timeline Haruka brings up that he's thinking about how to do it. How to end his own life to keep his promise to her and she says nothing to dissuade him from it. While knowing full and well what he's talking about because again she told us he told her.
"Mhm. Haruka-kun told me."
These are the facts from her own mouth.
This is the sequence of events. I do not believe this is a difficult set of circumstances to follow or look into but they are easy things for people to purposely misconstrue. In a way that I can only consider to be an attempt to make Mu sound more considerate than her actions and own words display her as being.
Hell I know for certain that some overzealous individual is going to get in their feelings and go,
"Well Jackalope said in the trial three commencement notice that Mu has trouble putting her emotions into words. He said 'She doesn’t know where or what her feelings are. She just lacks the skills to put them into words, but a human such as she, is quite complicated.'. Maybe this means Mu really did care about Haruka and just didn't know the proper way to express that or how to handle the situation."
One I'm not arguing against that.
I am however arguing what does that have to do with Haruka dying and the words she did say throughout the entire time he was slowly wasting away in his cell from starvation? Like I don't care about how she's feeling about it now when all is said and done. Because while Haruka was starving himself she was having people praise her for bringing him food she knew he wasn't eating?
Because again the first time she brought the food to him she verbally noted he was not eating properly. So the timeline and again Mu's own statements portray that she was aware Haruka was not eating from the onset.
Yet, continued to tell people things such as,
"I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me?" - [Milgram Portal Timeline-23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)] "I’ve been taking his food to him like this every day. Isn’t that great of me?" - [Milgram Portal Timeline- 24/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)]
However a lot of people want to spin it as though Mu went through something just as tragic as what Yuno went through.
That she spent months trying to do right by someone and help them get better just to have them die.
It's a pretty easy story to want to spin for Mu's character. Especially when the parties telling it have a vested interest in ignoring certain information. Simply because they want to see the best in someone to validate themselves regardless of how that someone has consistently behaved.
Even her saying you have to eat has been twisted around to say she was telling him to eat so she was really trying to help him and tell him not to do this through saying that. This was her showing concern for Haruka. When what it is- Is definitive proof that while no one else knew Haruka wasn't eating until they found him starved to death or near starved to death Mu did know.
How could she not have known.
She was bringing him food everyday. She saw him every day. Starvation isn't something that can go unnoticed. People will literally lose weight. They will get thinner. There's no way to starve gracefully. Heck it's not even that difficult to tell when someone isn't eating their food.
Definitely not in Mu's case because again it is something she noted he was not doing on June 22, 2023,
"You have to eat your food properly."
Mu Kusunoki to Haruka Sakurai on June 23, 2023 far long before he starved to death.
Now logistically what could she have done? It's not like she could have forced him to eat. What could she have done outside of saying hey you should eat properly?
Well you see there's this thing called an intervention. There's this thing called telling people there's a problem. There's this thing called when multiple people give someone the opportunity to tell them that something is going wrong and another person needs help far beyond what they can provide doing that.
Something Mu was given chances to do but decided to instead assure people that Haruka was fine and she was taking him his food every day. Stating and implying to them that he's being taken care of and eating properly through her statements. Because she's showing them the food, the plates, and saying this is what she's doing.
Why would they not believe her?
Now there's discussions around the fact that anyone within Milgram could have taken some time to go into Haruka's cell and check on them their selves. However, that takes us back to Mu as well because Futa and Shidou asked Mu if Haruka was alright because she was going there every day and they may not have wanted to barge into Haruka's space. This is just a polite thing to do. Since Mu assured them that he was in fact fine and look he's eating see I just took him this then possibly showed them an eaten plate of food-
What the fuck were they supposed to do? Go,
"LIAR- He's starving himself in there isn't he?!"
Shove Mu to the ground barge into Haruka's room and go,
"Haruka we're here to save you this is an intervention. You will have three meals a day like the rest of us and water. Then we will walk daily and start you on communications counseling because this isn't healthy physically or mentally. Kajiyama grab his legs we're taking him to the dining hall."
And force fed him like Curly is Mouthwashing. No, that would be wild. Just believe her. The fuck why would they not believe her? Fuck I would have believed her too. Like okay I believe you that's your friend. The fuck you gotta lie for. If you say you're taking him food then I believe you and I have other things to do but if this continues I'll go in there to check myself eventually.
At the end of the day she knew Haruka wasn't eating she noted that. All to then not get anyone to intervene or help in any way. In fact she assured people time and time again even after Haruka was probably dead that he was fine.
23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)
Futa: Oi, you. Is he ok? He’s not even left his room lately. Mu: You mean Haruka-kun? Hmm. Yeah, probably. I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me? Futa: Hah? Who the hell says that sort of thing about themself. ……ah, no, well, right now I understand a bit. When you’re feeling down, it’s nice to have someone who relies on you and accepts you. The rest of us can’t really understand you from where we’re standing. But well, if you’re Haruka’s “salvation” then I guess it really is great. Mu: Salvation……? I don’t know what you mean. Futa-kun, you don’t sound like yourself. Did you hit your head or something? Oh, wait, you actually did, didn’t you. Ahaha. Ah, putting that aside though, did you know it’s my birthday today?
24/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Shidou: ……I’m worried about Sakurai-kun. I haven’t seen him around in a while. You’ve been talking with him, right? Mu: He’s fine. Here, look. I’ve been taking his food to him like this every day. Isn’t that great of me? Shidou: Yes, very. I’m sorry I’ve been leaving it to you to look after him. Usually, that would be the job of us adults, and yet we’re leaving you with the burden. Mu: Don’t worry about it. After all, me and Haruka-kun are friends.
Something that goes straight back to what Mu said she would do in regards to Haruka threatening his own life. Again it's not Mu's fault he's dead I don't consider suicide murder and neither does Milgram. Haruka choose to take himself out and that's a choice I've gotta respect. Nobody forced him to make that threat or follow through on it.
Yet no one stopped him either. Milgram, Es, the audience or Mu. None of those things stopped him from doing that or even attempted to.
Mu's defenders can't have their cake and eat it too. They can't say it's the audience fault for not voting Mu innocent and stopping Haruka because Mu didn't stop Haruka either.
Like Mu said,
Mu Queen B 13:05s
You know about it and you're not trying to stop him? Haruka, that is?
"Haruka-kun says that's what he wants, so there's nothing I can do, right?" But you're calling him your friend.
Yeah Mu, you're right. That's what Haruka wanted to attach his life to and die for. Nothing we could've done about it. Es didn't make him threaten himself. The audience didn't either. We should just respect the choices he made to get himself to that conclusion.
Heck at least he got to choose how he went out. That's more than Shidou and Mahiru got.
The last timeline we see with him even supports this,
24/04/19 (Futa’s Birthday)
Futa: ––Hey, are you really ok with this? If you come with me, there’s a chance you can be saved too…… Haruka. Haruka: Yeah…… I’ve made my mind up. I have, something, that I have to do. Futa: Ah, is that right…… Haruka, you know, you’re an idiot. There’s no way…… that will save you…… Haruka: Yeah, thank you. I’m glad you came to talk to me, Futa. Um, thank you, for being so kind. Really. But, I’m sorry. This is all I’m able to do……
All those times she brought food and she never offered him a way out of that promise. She never said this is how you can get out of this. This is how you can move forward with me too. You're life doesn't have to end here. No the person who did that? Who was it again?
Was it the person that brought meals there everyday. That people are trying to jump through hoops to say couldn't notice someone starving right in front of them. Even though that someone was a person she'd been attached to at the hip prior. She could notice when he wasn't making eye contact or distracted by something,
22/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Mu: What’s wrong, Haruka-kun? Did something happen? You shouldn’t look away like that when you’re together with me. Haruka: Ah, s-sorry, Mu-san. Um…… No, it’s nothing. I just, suddenly got a feeling. That something is about to happen. Mu: Isn’t that because it’s your birthday? Or perhaps it’s a sign the guard is about to wake up again soon? Fufufu, I bet they’ll be really surprised at a lot of things. Haruka: That, might be true. But, I want the the guard to see. ……the new, me…….
But not a change in his weight. She's not observant enough to recognize the signs of starvation. Even though she went there every day with food. Alright, sure I believe you.
You know I'm not even mad at Mu because Haruka is dead. I'm mad at Mu because Haruka died for someone who no matter how much I comb through the facts did not give one fuck about him. To the point that the last notable thing Haruka did was not thank Mu for being kind to him didn't even thank her for that once if we're being honest but someone else.
Who even while going through the shit he did and saying he didn't have the luxury to bother being concerned about him. Was the first to ask if he was okay. Was the first to check in with the person he saw as being closest to Haruka to just check if he was alright. Then when the situation persisted went in there himself to check on his own birthday.
Just to be meet with what exactly. I was curious about what Futa saw that made him seem so panicked. Curious about how Haruka had done it. But now we know he went in there and saw a shell of person thin, starved, on the brink of death. Probably not too different from how Mikoto's trial three art looks at this point.
And he pleaded with Haruka to just leave be saved some other way. Like damn sure Amane's religion makes him vegan but at least he's eating. It's something I really can't let go it's not murder of course. Mu didn't kill Haruka with her barehands she didn't even kill him at all. But it's just the idea of going to same place every day with the thing that could save someone's life and knowing they're not taking it. All while again and again assuring people it's fine I'm taking him the thing.
((Part 2 here since tumblr only allows 30 images per post!!)
if you've never engaged with a creative art on a regular basis you need to understand that it requires concerted effort to get into "the groove" to make something and every second that it takes to get into that groove causes physical pain, but the only thing worse than doing it is not doing it.
Current fixations: Noel the Mortal Fate, Angels of Death(My AoD obsession will never die)
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