I Am Not Feeling Anything.... Nothing At All.

I am not feeling anything.... nothing at all.

No anger , love , hatred, care , guilt, sadness , happy ,pain and whatever feelings there exists.

I feel nothing.

I wanna be vulnerable again , wanna cry it all out , wanna laugh being happy .

I want to feel it!

Want that serotonin, dopamine, gaba to hit my dormant receptors and produce feelings , normal feelings which everyone deserves , ME TOO!.

More Posts from Itsdark-walkaway and Others

3 years ago

Falling in the mystery of universe is a good way to escape YOU!


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2 years ago

Don't know why.

But I DON'T FEEL RIGHT.


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2 years ago

Found you, finally remember your name.

Heyo …. the butterfly lover?

2 years ago

Today I saw death

But I escaped

I think it's still lingering behind me.


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2 years ago

Have you ever felt it?

Days where…

It feels like a constant struggle to push forward. That even if you put your best foot forward, it’s like you might as well be bringing both off the edge of a cliff.

Have You Ever Felt It?

Maybe…

Times where you genuinely and painstakingly question the meaning of life, of existing on this planet, of being around.

You know that you should keep going — because surely, everyone has a purpose or something to at least try to strive towards — but at the same time more thoughts keep weighing you down with why it might just all be in vain.

Am I unwanted? Unneeded? An unnecessary obstacle or burden to those who cross paths with me?

Have You Ever Felt It?

If you’re growing under the wary eye and disapproving glare of an emotionally unavailable parent, does that mean you’re just another mouth to feed, another disgusting waste of space that only regains clarity or becomes redeemable when you’re needed for something, or are useful to the objecting person in question?

Surely not. Surely if you hypothetically could surround yourself with a lighter crowd of people who appreciate you for who you are inside and outside, for what good you can bring despite your setbacks and flaws and mistakes and imperfections and bad decisions…

Have You Ever Felt It?

Surely you would realize you mean a lot to someone out there. To at least one other person living on this planet.

It’s hard to fully regain sense and your bearings during times like these.

Days where you can barely imagine the future of five, ten years ahead — heck, even a week or a month ahead — when just this one day feels like a mountain crushing you from the inside out, and then back again.

Over and over and over.

Have You Ever Felt It?

If you can piece together moments like these from your own life, maybe you’re going through something similar. Or have, for that matter.

I want to believe there is light at the end of the tunnel. That no matter how many times I get crushed and broken down little by little, that no matter how many times the same wounds get ripped open and abandoned with salt freshly poured to sting and burn at my core, at the crux of who I am or who I think I am, that something good — surely! — will come about.

Have You Ever Felt It?

And that every bad day brings me closer to the good day that will eventually become a good period, and finally, a good, consistent period of life.

Once and for all.

Maybe that’s why I continue reading so much, even as an adult now.

Because for whatever wishful thinking might result, some part of me desperately wants to believe — even if I can only vicariously feel it right now — that those stories of characters overcoming family abuse to find love, peace, a home among those who truly and unconditionally love and care about them…

Have You Ever Felt It?

Can actually become a reality.

For me. For you.

For everyone.

Because at the end of the day, I still have to remind myself…

Ending it all — by my hands — would only cut short a life that might be wonderful on the other side of this tunnel.

Have You Ever Felt It?

No matter how dark and horrid and painful it may be right in this moment.

3 years ago

Removing toxicity from life !


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It’s a dark place

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