—  I’m Deaf And I Have ‘Perfect’ Speech. Here’s Why It’s Actually A Nightmare.

When I’m out with Deaf friends, I put my hearing aid in my purse. It removes any ability to hear, but far more importantly, it removes the ambiguity that often haunts me.

In a restaurant, we point to the menu and gesture with the wait staff. The servers taking the order respond with gestures too. They pantomime “drinks?” and tell us they learned a bit of signs in kindergarten. Looking a little embarrassed, they sign “Rain, rain, go away, come again another day” in the middle of asking our salad dressing choice. We smile and gently redirect them to the menu. My friends are pros at this routine and ordering is easy ― delightful even. The contrast with how it feels to be out with my hearing husband is stunning.

Once my friends and I have ordered, we sign up a storm, talking about everything and shy about nothing. What would be the point? People are staring anyway. Our language is lavish, our faces alive. My friends discuss the food, but for me, the food is unimportant. I’m feasting on the smorgasbord of communication ― the luxury of chatting in a language that I not only understand 100% but that is a pleasure in and of itself. Taking nothing for granted, I bask in it all, and everything goes swimmingly.

Until I accidentally say the word “soup” out loud.

Pointing at the menu, I let the word slip out to the server. And our delightful meal goes straight downhill. Suddenly, the wait staff’s mouths start flapping; the beautiful, reaching, visual parts of their brains go dead, as if switched off.

“Whadda payu dictorom danu?” the server’s mouth seems to say. “Buddica taluca mariney?”

“No, I’m Deaf,” I say. A friend taps the server and, pointing to her coffee, pantomimes milking a cow. But the damage is done. The server has moved to stand next to me and, with laser-focus, looks only at me. Her pen at the ready, her mouth moves like a fish. With stunning speed, the beauty of the previous interactions ― the pantomiming, the pointing, the cooperative taking of our order ― has disappeared. “Duwanaa disser wida coffee anmik? Or widabeeaw fayuh-mow?”

Austin “Awti” Andrews (who’s a child of Deaf adults, often written as CODA) describes a similar situation.

“Everything was going so well,” he says. “The waiter was gesturing, it was terrific. And then I just said one word, and pow!! It’s like a bullet of stupidity shot straight into the waiter’s head,” he explains by signing a bullet in slow motion, zipping through the air and hitting the waiter’s forehead. Powwwww.

Hearing people might be shocked by this, but Deaf people laugh uproariously, cathartically.

“Damn! All I did was say one word!” I say to my friends. “But why do you do that?” they ask, looking at me with consternation and pity. “Why don’t you just turn your voice off, for once and for all?” they say.

Hearing people would probably think I’m the lucky one ― the success story ― because I can talk. But I agree with my friends.

  —  I’m Deaf And I Have ‘Perfect’ Speech. Here’s Why It’s Actually A Nightmare.

More Posts from Isawthe-sign and Others

9 months ago

I'm learning how to do websites in my Ed Tech class, so I made The Sign - Resource. It's a bunch of reasources for learning ASL and Deaf culture.


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2 years ago
Petition: Add British Sign Language to the national curriculum
Petitions - UK Government and Parliament
We want the Government to add BSL to the school curriculum by making it a core subject for all students. British Sign Language is used by ar

this is a petition to add british sign language to the claimnational curriculum. if you could sign (uk residents only) or reblog that would be really helpful :)

8 months ago

What is Black American Sign Language? 🤟🏾

Preserving Black American Sign Language in the Deaf community
ABC News
"It felt so free to me. It felt good to just communicate. You know, that was who I was. That was my culture. That was my identity.”
languageandlife.org

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8 months ago

🖐

My favorite cheeses are Belavitano(basically any variation but Merlot if I have to chose), Talegio, Stilton with blueberries, smoked Mozzarella, and Mimolette.

the sign for cheese in American Sign Language.

Cheese

Sources: SigningSavvy, Lifeprint, ASLDeafined

[Image ID: the sign for cheese in American Sign Language. Both hands are horizontal, palms touching in B handshape. Dominant hand on top twists back and forth. Hands are designed to resemble various cheeses. End ID]


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10 months ago
a shirt, two stickers, a button, and a card with ASL art from 58creativity.

Got some cool stuff from 58creativity!

[Image ID: a picture of 5 items:

1: a tan T-shirt. The design has a mountain, trees, and play outside in English and ASL.

2: a sticker of the sign grow, which is green with a plant coming out of the top hand.

3: a sticker of the sign for tea with the base hand replaced with a teacup and leaves.

4: a blue button that has the sign for support and a heart under the words "Support Deaf Artists."

5: a note from the artist that says, "Thank you so much for purchasing and sorting my business as a deaf artist. Your support means a lot to me as it inspires me to create more." There is line art of the artist signing thank you.

End ID]


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4 months ago

so I'm deaf, and I get new hearing aids every 4-5 years. every time I do this, the sound is different, and I have to take some time to relearn sounds. my most recent pair is a very different brand from what I've previously had, meaning that the sound is very different as well. this, of course, means extra word to relearn sounds. this is absolutely exhausting.

I just find it strange that, while I am relearning a sense, I can't realistically take time off of school. I still have so many assignments and stuff that I have to do, all while feeling like a toddler that's been up too long.

basically, I should be allowed to have a break when I get new hearing aids without having to do 12 billion catch up assignments afterwards

8 months ago

Had to do a PowerPoint for school and decided it needed more art at the last second.

immersion in ASL and English.
great in ASL and English.
goal in ASL and English.
topic in ASL and English.
success in ASL and English.
learn in ASL and English.
experience in ASL and English.

[Image IDs: 7 drawings of signs in American Sign Language along with English translations. Movement is shown by various shades of blue going up in brightness. In order the signs are immersion, great, goal, topic, success, learn and experience. End ID]


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7 months ago
Poster for Deaf Austin Theatre's Short Play Festival.

Tickets

I'm really looking forward to this! Interpreted performance just aren't the same (though I still appreciate it. Don't stop).

[Image ID: Poster for Deaf Austin Theatre's Short Play Festival. Art is of an alley at night. The plays, which are available to stream through stellar Novels 8th through 16th, are:

Days Between Us written by Heba Toulan,

Dumpster Diving written by Rob Roth and Joshua Castile,

Matchmaker written by Beth Louise Johnson,

The Deaf Table written by Garrett Zuercher, and

Wands Have More Fun by Allison Fradkin.

There is a qr code in the bottom right corner to get virtual tickets. End ID]


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9 months ago
Pig in American Sign Language.

Pig

Sources: SigningSavvy, ASLDeafined

[Image ID: Pig in American Sign Language. Hand in B handshape palm down rests under the chin then changes to Bent-B handshape. Above the hands is a pig face. End ID]


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1 year ago
Beach in ASL

Beach

Sources: SigningSavvy, Lifeprint, ASLDeafined

[Image ID:

Beach in American Sign Language. Hands in 5 handshapes palms down. Dominant hand is pointed towards the side of base hand in front of the signer. Dominant hand moves over base hand and back like water on the shore.

End ID]


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isawthe-sign - I Saw the Sign
I Saw the Sign

they/them, hearing, Interpreting major. Online resources: https://sites.google.com/view/thesign-resource If you wanna learn ASL, try and find in-person classes with a culturally Deaf teacher and make sure you learn about Deaf culture as well! [Profile Pic ID: The sign for Art in American Sign Language. End ID]

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