Its Christmas Eve And Look Whos On Tumblr

I love the headcanon that Jason writes fanfiction and the funniest part of it to me is how his author notes would take the ao3 curse to a whole new level

A/N: here you go guys. Sorry it’s a couple days late, I spent the entirety of yesterday forcing soup and fever-reducers down my brothers throat while he actively told me he wasn’t sick

comments: omg is your brother okay?? Jason, responding: yeah he’s fine now. I took my eyes off him for a second, he downed a coffee and it fucking healed him?? Idefk. comments: wtf

Jason: yo sorry this was a little rushed, my sister’s ballet recital was crashed by the joker and I spent the night helping with the relief efforts comments: damn your siblings are living crazy lives Jason: you don’t know the half of it

Jason: this chapter was a week late, yeah. Sorry about that. I died again.

Prophet

Tony Stark - Prometheus

Vision of Pepper screaming and the Arc Reactor

"I dreamt we had a kid"

Bruce's bar

"That's the Endgame"

Hulk's Glorious Purpose

Inevitable

Broken shield

Home

...

hades explaining that he’s the god of the dead, not the god of death

Peter trying his best to be sexy and seductive but Tony just finds it adorable and gives him cuddles and kisses. The boy is simply too cute and innocent.

“I’m trying to seduce you,” Peter pouts.

Tony smiles and kisses Peter’s hair, cuddling him tightly and speaking into his soft curls. “I’m seduced.”

“How?”

“You’ve got me wrapped around your little finger, you know that?”

Peter groans. “I want my mouth wrapped around your… you-know,” he mumbles shyly against Tony’s chest, blushing.

Tony laughs softly. “My what?”

“You know, Mr Stark.”

“If you can’t even say it how are you going to seduce me?”

“I thought you were already seduced?”

“By your cuteness,” Tony says softly, kissing Peter’s hair again.

Peter sighs but can’t help smiling. Maybe he’s not entirely ready for sex yet and that’s why he’s not “sexy” or “seductive”, but at least Tony doesn’t seem to mind right now. In fact, he seems to love Peter the way he is, and Peter can’t really ask for anything more.

Jason should kill the Joker and just not tell anyone. like, lets be real here, if he were to silently slip in and kill the Joker in his sleep, are any of the workers at Arkham really going to give enough of a shit to say anything??? with the paperwork they’d have to do, and the attention they’d get once the media caught wind of the break in/murder, i bet all Jason would have to do is leave like, a basket of muffins next to the dead body as a thank you and the staff would just dispose of the body and shut the fuck up about it.

i bet you he could get through a solid six to eight month period of being weirdly happy and interactive with the rest of the family before Dick finally asks why he’s been in such a good mood lately over family dinner

Jason, casually: i dunno, i guess i’ve just had a weight lifted from my shoulders; there’s less to drive me away now.

Bruce, thinking he’s finally done something right: aw Jaylad, i’m so happy you’re feeling more comfortable!

Dick, the only batkid around when Jason was Robin, remembering all the times Jason would transform into the happiest kid on the planet only for them to find out a week later it was because he’d pushed a bully down the stairs at school and fractured his wrist: hold on B.

Dick: Jay, what weight has been lifted?

Jason, still nonplussed: well i finally got my GED, and the Joker thing really calmed the lazarus rage. also Steph got me into puppy yoga, we go once a week.

Bruce:

Bruce: what Joker thing.

Jason, glancing up from his food: ? d’i not mention that? he’s dead, man.

Bruce:

Dick:

Dick: sorry, what?

Tim: why the fuck am i never invited to puppy yoga?

Bruce, having a panic attack: y- what are you talking about Jay-

Tim: i would LOVE to go to puppy yoga. what the FUCK?

Jason, shrugging: you can come to puppy yoga, replacement, it’s all good

Bruce: the Joker’s dead?

Tim: FUCK YEAH, PUPPY YOGA

Jason: i think they do it with goats too.

Damian: i would be interested in this activity.

Jason: hell yeah family yoga session

Bruce: JASON PLEASE EXPAND ON THE JOKER THING

Jason: no i don’t like your tone. anyway, dick, puppy yoga?

Dick:

Dick, glancing at Bruce’s glare nervously: …i would be down for puppy yoga

coquette tumblr girls love to compare themselves to prey animals. uhm no. deer will literally shred you with their kicking hooves and they are beautiful and strong. you are something else that rolls over and dies.

everyone was afraid of him

imagination free

>print available<

Never forget:

Steve Rogers was a theatre kid, starred in movies, wore micro shorts and tights everyday on stage (Bucky: You're keeping the outfit right?), and lost his virginity to a groupie

Bucky Barnes is a nerd—eager to go to the Stark Expo science exhibit, read the Hobbit books as soon as they were released—and was also a great dancer. 1940s dating culture involved a lot of dancing, and good dancers got dates