Tdp Writers Giving Us Season 4: I Noticed You Like Emotional Whiplash. Here Have A Few More!

Humanity has finally found a way to communicate with crabs, we realize they're smarter than us. Now that they know we know, what are they going to do?

Sit and wait in the depths of the oceans. Sacrificing their weakest to be devoured by the walking flesh beings. While they wait for humanities inevitable demise at their own hands. Then and only then will they make shells out of our skulls and kingdoms out of our bones.

Everyone, including the birds in question, call Batman's cape "the bird cage."

His birds will just walk up to him and say "bird cage?" and he'll open up his cape and let them hide, if they bother to say anything at all.

----

Red Hood, grumbly:..... Bird Cage?

[Bruce, fighting back both tears and a giant grin, opens up his cape just enough for Jason to squeeze in]

Dick, muffled, from under the cape: Aw, little wing, it's good to see you in here again!

Tim, also muffled: I'd appreciate it if you'd get off my foot though, before you break it, Brick House.

Jason, now muffled as well: Oh waaah, baby bird, your hollow little bones too fragile?

Ollie:.... How many of them are under there??

Bruce:....All of them.

Barry: How?!

Bruce: You're asking me like I'd know. I stopped questioning it. They won't tell me.

i get why they say “flirting with the dark side” now

person A: hey would you love me if-

person B: exasperated if u were a worm? yes, you would b the sexiest worm alive.

person A:

person B: looks over at A What?

person A: I was gonna say if I killed all your enemies so that you’d live a life unburdened by the threat of others, but sure being a worm sounds nice:)

Batcat shenanigans 🙈

this through the moon ref tho

au where Jason stays with Talia and Damian after being resurrected because he’s gone slightly insane and wants to commit murder and Talia is having none of that, nope, gonna convince child to stay at my side until the Pit wears off, Ra’s be damned.

fast forward a few years, Jason has mostly chilled out, though is still down to murder criminals. He spends most of his time annoying the hell out of Ra’s and sometimes running missions behind Ra’s back for Talia. He’s basically Damian’s older brother. Probably goes by either Jay or Jace, but Damian at least is aware that his full name is Jason since he’s heard Talia use it. Jason has thought about letting the bats know he’s alive, but always backed out.

then Talia sends Damian to live with Bruce. Jason is often away on his own by this point, for missions or just because he wants to travel, and isn’t there when this happens. 

now, Damian is an absolutely brat, and everyone immediately is like “WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS.” they’re going through the house and Damian is making snotty comments about everything when suddenly he freezes, surprising everyone. He squints at a portrait on the wall.

“…who’s that?” he asks slowly.

Bruce stiffens.

“Ah, that’s… Jason. Jason Todd. The second Robin. He… died, a while ago,” Dick explains with a sad, faraway smile.

“…..riiiiiiight,” Damian says slowly. Suddenly a whole lot of things make sense – he knows Jay came back from the dead, but he doesn’t know how Jay and Mother knew each other. “If you’ll excuse me. I need to make a phone call.”

He sprints out of the room.

(Talia, for the record, definitely knew this was going to happen when she sent Damian to Bruce.)

Two weeks later Damian tows a reluctant young man with black hair into the Batcave, trailed by an astonished Alfred.

“Damian!” Bruce says, horrified. “You can’t just bring strangers into the Cave! It’s completely irresponsible, do you have any ideas what the consequences could be for us-”

There’s a crash, and they all turn to stare. Dick is staring at Damian and the newcomer, stunned, his chair lying sideways on the ground. “That’s impossible,” he murmurs, voice shaking. “You’re –”

Damian rolls his eyes. “Jace isn’t a stranger, Father. He’s my brother.”

“Brother-?” Bruce turns to look at the man, and promptly drops the files he’s holding.

Jason Todd smiles nervously at him. “Hey, old man. Long time no see.”

EDIT: I have more! Check out Way Too Many HCs I Have for this AU because it’s pure fluff and I’m living for it at the moment

EDIT 2: This au is now called “Remained”! All posts for to it can be found at the “remained au” tag.

Am i the only one that found hunter blowing a raspberry at kiki kinda off in the moment. then seeing the end it makes more sense now?

" luz how do you explain to your gay uncle who doesn't know he's gay that straight people exist"