Why Do People Leave Me And Not Feel An Absence? Nothing About Me Was Worth Having? Nothing Worth Remembering?

BITE ME — SUNGHOON ONESHOT

SYNOPSIS : Throughout history, it has been a common practice for vampires to select unsuspecting individuals from the streets as a source of food, feasting not only on their blood but also on their fear. Sunghoon, accustomed to encountering terrified individuals, found it unusual to come across someone devoid of terror in their eyes—until he met you. Not being in the right state of mind, you had requested him to bite you instead. This unexpected request stirred a peculiar warmth in Sunghoon's pale cheeks, deviating from his usual routine of draining all of one's blood.

— when a supposed feast turns into an surprising attraction.

PAIRING : vampire!sunghoon x fem!reader

GENRE : fantasy, vampire au, strangers to lovers

WARNINGS : mentions of blood, biting, kidnapping, marks on body, mentions of food, cursing, mentions of toxic parents, abandonment, lmk if there’s any more!

FEATURING : all of enhypen

WORD COUNT : 15.7K+ (15722)

SOPH : its here its here!!! def the longest fic i’ve ever wrote 😭 . god this fic will be a ROLLER COASTER i swear (me saying that as roller coaster by txt is playing). i gen had so much fun writing this fic and i was so immersed in writing 😭 this is my first time writing a vampire au so i think its pretty okay for a first timer 🙏 posted a teaser of this and FINALLY finished it sooo thats great 😊 anyways, i hope you enjoy this fic as much as i enjoyed writing it <3

thank you for my wonderful mooties who read / seen some parts of the fic, your help + comments were great <3 + esp @flwoie , who proofread the whole thing that made their grammar checker crash MANY times … love you 😊🩷

also tysm for 1.5K+ :( <3 i can never be more grateful for all of you guys to keep little tabs on my works so thank you <3 i guess you say this is dedicated for it since i dont have an event planned out for it sooo <3!

ONE — desire for blood

The moon held high in the night sky, casting an eerie glow over the deserted streets. Sunghoon quickened his pace, brushing against the tall trees that stood before him. Seeking respite, he sought out an empty clearing, settling upon a rugged rock, a faint groan escaping his lips as a throbbing ache pulsated in his head. The change in his eye color served a reminder that he needed to find something, a person whose blood he could consume.

“Jay, I’m going to murder you.” he muttered under his breath, stealing a glance at the night sky. Jay had left him to venture alone, an attempt to foster his independence. “I better find someone, fast.” Renewed determination surged through him as he rose from the rock, relying on his heightened senses and supernatural swiftness to locate his prey.

It was difficult to find someone out in the dark, anyone would know better not to walk alone at night. Especially near the forests, near the vampire’s homes. Yet, there were always those foolish souls who remained oblivious to the dangers, dismissing the existence of the immortal creatures. This was the only time Sunghoon wished for a person just like that to appear in front of his eyes.

Moving with an otherworldly grace, Sunghoon's senses sharpened, propelling him forward with astonishing speed as the scent grew stronger. His swift strides covered considerable ground within mere seconds, until his gaze settled upon a woman strolling along the trail adjacent to the forest—an unwitting offering destined to be his meal for the night.

Focusing on his thoughts, he quickly tapped into the energy that coursed through his immortal veins. Gradually, his body began to shimmer, as if fading from the mortal realm. His transition was complete, and Sunghoon found himself invisible, taking swift steps toward his victim.

Unaware of the danger, his target continued along her path, oblivious to the invisible presence stalking her. Sunghoon positioned himself behind you, mere inches away, his concealed form ready to strike. A muffled scream escaped your lips, stifled by his own hand.

Frantically attempting to break free, her resistance waned, her body growing limp in his firm grasp. A smirk tugged at Sunghoon's lips as his elongated fangs became visible, a sinister transformation hinting at his insatiable thirst. Another night, another feast secured. Without delay, he took her away to his old castle, where he would drain every drop of blood from his new victim.

TWO — bite me

Upon entering the castle, Sunghoon was greeted by a bustling scene that filled the halls. His eyes landed on Jay, lounging in a chair and casually holding a wine glass filled with blood. Jay's legs rested nonchalantly on Sunghoon's cherished table, an act that irked him.

"You're back?" Jay chuckled, wiping the traces of blood from his mouth. Sitting up straight, he placed the glass down and met Sunghoon's gaze. "How did it go?"

"It went fine, but once I finish my meal, I'm going to make sure you regret leaving me alone," Sunghoon retorted, his tone laced with a simmering threat.

"Oh, come on—wait, you brought your meal home? I thought you were planning on disposing of that body," Jay remarked, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

"Yeah, well, Jake does this all the time," Sunghoon replied dismissively, his impatience growing.

"That's true. Well, you better hurry. I can sense that the girl is about to regain consciousness," Jay advised, a mischievous smirk playing on his lips.

"I'm on it. And please refrain from putting your feet on my table. I had it custom made for a reason," Sunghoon grumbled, annoyance evident in his voice.

"I can't make any promises," Jay retorted with a smirk, reclaiming his drink. Sunghoon rolled his eyes in exasperation before walking up the spiral staircase. He showed no signs of struggle as he made his way to his room.

Arriving at a door emblazoned with his name, Sunghoon pushed it open, revealing a room adorned with eerie decor. He carefully placed you in front of his ornate chair, a seat that had witnessed countless victims before their deaths.

Adjusting the leather straps to your wrists, he makes sure it’s difficult for you to break free. Settling into his seat, he positioned himself directly in front of you, patiently awaiting your return to consciousness. It didn't take long for the groan that signaled your awakening to reach his ears.

As you struggled to open your eyes, the world appeared hazy and disorienting. Blinking repeatedly, you attempted to discern the figure before you, but the blurriness persisted. Your hand instinctively moved to rub your eyes, only to discover the confinement of the restraints. Panic surged through your veins—were you being held captive?

"You're finally awake?" His voice resonated, sending shivers down your spine in a way no ordinary human's voice ever had. Gradually, your vision cleared, revealing a man seated across from you. His dark brown hair fell messily across his forehead, while he wore a black cloak, a suit adorned with ornate gold gems, and a partially unbuttoned white shirt, hinting at an air of elegance mingled with darkness.

Taking off his cloak, he makes eye contact with you again, and you get a gulp of fear. A smirk played on his lips, his sharpened fangs now fully visible, confirming your worst suspicions—he was a vampire. Your heart raced, with fear coursing through your veins with increasing intensity. Fuck, they were actually real. You were certainly not dreaming.

"Your fear only enhances your scent. Only makes it smell sweeter and irresistible for vampires like me." He remarked, rising from his seat, his senses captivated by the intoxicating aroma that came from you. Rare and special, your scent beckoned to him, captivating his vampiric instincts. Grateful that Jay's hunger hadn't pushed him to steal his meal in mere moments, Sunghoon savored the anticipation.

“You'd better calm that racing heart of yours before I lose control," he warned, his frigid breath grazing your neck as he leaned in closer to deliver his message. Inhaling deeply, you tried to steady your breathing, attempting to stop the pounding beats that echoed within your chest. Sunghoon emitted a low chuckle, surprised at how obedient humans could become when vulnerable to the supernatural allure of his presence.

Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued as he observed your lack of response. Returning to his seat, he locked eyes with you once again, awaiting your words with an air of anticipation. Yet silence hung heavily in the room; words didn’t seem to escape easily from your mouth.

“You know, I’m not very patient,” he hissed softly, dissatisfied with the lingering quiet that filled his large room. “Don’t think you have any chance of making it out here alive. Just spit it out already.” Crossing his legs, he reached for the golden wine glass, tapping his sharp nails against the delicate surface, his gaze never leaving yours.

Caught off guard by the pressure, panic slipped past your lips, the words tumbling out before you could fully comprehend their weight. ‘Just….bite me.” The room fell into an eerie silence, granting you a moment to process what you had just said. Regret mingled as you realized the significance of what you had uttered.

“Well, that’s certainly unexpected,” Sunghoon responded, a mixture of bewilderment and intrigue flashing across his eyes. He sets the golden cup down, unable to form words himself. The request to be bitten, especially after learning his true nature as a vampire, was entirely new to him. It sparked a strange sensation within his being, a feeling he couldn’t quite decipher. Do humans also feel these kinds of emotions?

“You’re definitely a weird one,” Sunghoon remarked, still feeling flustered by your unconventional response.

“What do you mean?” you questioned, pretty oblivious to the whole situation.

“Most people wouldn’t dare ask a vampire to bite them, especially after their lives are on the line. It takes away the thrill of the feast,” he explained, a faint smile playing on his lips.

“Wait, so you vampires feed off fear too?” you inquired, attempting to make sense of the earlier statement.

“That’s a bit rude of you to address us that way.” A small frown forms on his face. “But, of course,” he replied, amusement evident in his tone, “that’s why I told you to claim your racing heart. Fear tends to make it beat even faster.”

“Well, guess what? I am scared right now,” you retorted, defiance lacing your words. “But you can just take a small amount of blood—definitely not all of it, I swear. And don’t forget, I’ll fight back if you push too far.”

Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, his amusement turning into a more serious demeanor. “Bold words from a mere weakling. Don’t forget who holds the power of a vampire here.”

“Don’t forget, you’re basically glued to that seat.” He taps on the arm rests of his chair, signaling the leather straps that restrain your hands from moving anywhere.

“Whatever,” you dismissed, frustration tainting your voice. “Are you going to bite me or not? I just want to get out of here, even though I have nowhere to go.”

A flicker of warning passed through Sunghoon's eyes as he leaned in closer. "Don't test my patience. You have no idea what I'm capable of."

Maintaining a strong gaze, Sunghoon straightened his posture, his eyes locking with yours. His tongue briefly flicked over his lips, causing his sharp fangs to show once more. “Do you really mean that?” he inquired, his voice laced with a mix of curiosity and hunger.

Nervously, you swallowed hard, offering a slow nod in response, Closing your eyes, you braced yourself, knowing his approach would come closer. The sound of his approaching footsteps echoed in your ears, heightening your fear. Your breath got caught in your throat as his breath brushed against your skin, signaling the upcoming bite. “The pain will be bearable. Just let me know when to stop, and I’ll stop,” he assured you.

“Really?” you stammered, your voice trembling, to which Sunghoon responded with a chuckle. “Vampires have self-control too, you know.”

With the warning given, his teeth easily punctured your neck, and to your surprise, the pain seemed to be more manageable than you thought. He proceeded to drink your blood, causing your head to grow dizzy as if he were sucking all your blood. “Stop,” you groaned, feeling the need to stop the dizziness.

Sunghoon withdrew his teeth, his mouth and fangs were stained with your blood. He was disappointed about how short you lasted, but your blood was great—the best he had in a while. It was sort of addicting; he couldn’t explain the taste. “Barely lasted two minutes. You truly are a weakling,” he snickered, wiping the blood from his chin.

"Shut up," you retorted, the remnants of your strength pushing you to respond. "Could you release my hands now? I promise I won't attempt to escape." You were desperate to remove the restraints being placed on your hands; you felt them becoming sore.

“Oh right,” he replied, walking over to free your hands effortlessly. As the restraints were finally removed, you let out a sigh of relief, feeling the soreness and observing the red marks left behind on your wrists. Instinctively, you tilted your head, your fingers gently making their way to the two puncture wounds near your neck. A hiss escaped your lips as pain radiated from the fresh marks.

“It should heal on its own soon, unless you’d prefer me to heal it immediately,” Sunghoon offered, his gaze focused on your every move. Curiosity tugged at his features as he awaited your response. “And how would you heal it?” you questioned, wary yet curious about his suggestion.

“Well, if you’re comfortable with me licking it–”

“I’ve heard enough,” you interjected, cutting him off. “I’ll pass—I’d be fine with some ointment or bandages.”

“Suit yourself. I’ll fetch something downstairs,” he stated, rising from his seat and adjusting the sleeves of his jacket. “Don’t even try to leave; we have matters to discuss later. And remember, there are other vampires roaming around here who won’t show you the same mercy I did. It would be wise of you to keep that in mind.” With those words of caution, he walked towards the room’s entrance and left after receiving your assurance,

Once again, you found yourself with nowhere else to go. And you definitely did not want to face any more bloodthirsty beings; one was definitely enough. However, an unsettling feeling gnawed at your stomach, and you tried to brush it aside by distracting your thoughts.

As you looked around, the weird atmosphere of the place suddenly became more noticeable, leaving you shuddering that you had only just noticed it.

THREE — keeping a secret

Leaving you to deal with your thoughts, Sunghoon ran down the stairs and made his way through the kitchen, determined to locate a first aid kit. As he rummaged through the cupboards, a voice suddenly disrupted his search, causing him to startle in fright. Jake, wearing a mischievous smirk, held a large cup of blood in his hand.

“God, don’t do that,” Sunghoon chastised, his heart still racing from the surprise.

“You haven’t had a good scare in a while, did you?” Jake chuckled, clearly amused by his reaction.

“Whatever. Do you happen to know where the first-aid kit is? I live here, yet I have no idea where things are kept.” Sunghoon said in annoyance, still looking in the cabinets.

“Why do you need it? You don’t seem to be injured.”

“I just want to have one in my room. I’m tired of coming down here every time I need something.”

“Ah, the life of a loner. That’s probably why Jay made you hunt for your own food—to get you out of your room. And you never leave that area.” Jake teased.

“And you never stop talking. Blood is all over your mouth; don’t embarrass yourself and wipe it.” Jake took Sunghoon’s remarks in stride. He wiped the blood from his mouth as instructed, unfazed by the insult. “The first aid kit is in that cabinet over there, second row.”

“Thanks. By the way, where’s Jay?” Sunghoon asked.

“Probably in the dining room. Why do you ask?” Jake responded.

“I need some more food.”

“Feast wasn’t enough today?”

“Not that. It was too good, and now I crave for more.”

“You should have shared; it must have been good if you say so,” Jake remarked playfully.

"Whatever. See you later. And make sure you clean up your mess. We don't need any more corpses lying around randomly," Sunghoon cautioned.

"Aye, aye, captain," Jake retorted, giving a mock salute.

After leaving Jake behind, Sunghoon continued his search for Jay and found him in the dining room, indulging in another feast. The woman’s screeches were so loud that it was possible to hear them outside of the castle.

“Oh god, not in open daylight.” Sunghoon pretended to cover his eyes, not wanting to see one of his brothers attack a person who's still alive. “We’re vampires, there’s no sunlight— ”

"Take a joke, will you? You're worse than Jake sometimes." Jay laughed, finding amusement in Sunghoon's reaction.

"Chill out, would you? No wonder the others tease you so much," Jay shot back, grabbing a cloth to wipe his mouth as he glanced at Sunghoon.

"Do you need anything?" Jay asked, curious to know what Sunghoon wanted.

"Yeah, do you have any blood packets?" Sunghoon inquired.

"Again? I told you to hunt for something fresh. Why settle for a packet?"

"You saw me carrying someone earlier. I guess that wasn't enough?"

"You need to hunt with me next time. You're not very good at it," Jay remarked.

"Says the person who needs at least five people to feel satisfied with their hunger," Sunghoon countered.

"Shut up. Anyway, you can take that one," Jay pointed to a person sitting in the room without moving. "He's under the influence of sleeping pills. He won't wake up for about eight hours."

"Well, it's certainly better than nothing," Sunghoon responded.

"Are you kidding? That one is blood type AB, the best kind you could get. You should be thankful," Jay emphasized.

Without further ado, Sunghoon sank his teeth into the guy's neck. The person's face grew pale, and their heart gradually slowed until it ceased to beat.

"You were right; that was the best kind," Sunghoon stated, satisfied with his meal. Though, it wasn’t better than yours.

"And you sure were starving. You owe me," Jay reminded him.

"Whatever. I'll just ask one of the guys to hunt someone like that for you," Sunghoon teased.

"You better keep your promise," Jay warned.

"I can't make any promises," Sunghoon mocked Jay, leaving the dining room and making his way back to his room. Jay laughed once more, sinking his teeth into the woman again.

Perhaps he would find a way to make you pay for making him come down here to face two of his annoying siblings.

FOUR — sealing the deal

After what seemed like hours, Sunghoon didn't take that long to come back to his room. I guess he is pretty attached to his own room. Meanwhile, you remained seated, growing increasingly bored as time dragged on. As he closed the door behind him, Sunghoon spoke up, breaking the silence.

“I’m back. Have you noticed any improvement in the healing of your wounds?” he asked. You emitted a soft hum in response, acknowledging the progress. Brushing your fingers over the scabs, you could feel the rough texture of the forming scars.

“Though they’re drying up, I still wouldn’t mind some ointment. And, of course, bandages, of any kind, really,” you requested. Sunghoon surprised you by offering his assistance and asking for your consent. It was a rare display of kindness from him. "Sure," you mumbled, feeling a warm flush on your cheeks. Pushing aside the unfamiliar feeling, you tilted your head towards Sunghoon, allowing him to take care of your wounds.

Sunghoon approached you, and a slightly surprised expression appeared on his face because of your agreement. He brought a chair and placed it closer to you, taking a seat. He moved closer, carefully examining the wounds on your neck. After looking at them, he reached for the first-aid kit he had brought from the kitchen.

Opening the kit, he took out the tube of ointment and a pack of bandages. With gentle movements, he applied the ointment to your wounds, his touch surprisingly tender. You felt a soothing sensation as he spread the ointment over the scabs, alleviating some of the discomfort.

Once the ointment was applied, he proceeded to place a couple of bandages on your neck, securing them in place. He worked efficiently, his movements precise yet careful. The bandages provided a protective layer over the wounds, preventing you from picking at the scabs.

As Sunghoon finished tending to your injuries, he stepped back, looking at his work. “There you go,” he said softly, a hint of satisfaction in his voice. “That should help with the healing. If you want me to check up on it, just let me know.”

You thanked him, appreciating his unexpected act of kindness. Despite the circumstances, there was a fleeting moment of connection between you and Sunghoon—a brief glimpse of a different side to him.

As Sunghoon tidied up the first aid kit and stowed it away, an uneasy silence settled in the room. You anxiously twiddle your thumbs while waiting for him to address the matter he mentioned earlier.

"Oh, right!" Sunghoon exclaimed, as if suddenly remembering. He took a seat closer to you, causing a slight flutter of anticipation in your chest.

"You mentioned that you have nowhere to go, correct?" he confirmed, seeking clarification.

"Yes, that's right." You nodded, your voice tinged with curiosity. You couldn't help but wonder where this conversation was headed.

“How about I let you stay here?” Sunghoon proposed, his voice filled with a surprising offer.

“Here...?” you repeated, a hint of disbelief in your tone. The room you were currently in didn’t exactly scream comfort or safety.

“Yes, here in my room,” Sunghoon confirmed, slightly perplexed by your reaction. He was about to remind you of your past statement about having nowhere to go.

“And how long are you suggesting I stay?” you asked, wanting to clarify the terms of the arrangement.

“As long as you want,” he replied, not understanding why you’re hesitating to just agree.

“Well…I have to ask, what’s the catch?” you questioned, sensing that such an offer wouldn’t come without a price.

“You catch on quickly,” Sunghoon remarked, acknowledging how clever you were. “In exchange for your stay, I propose that you provide me with your blood. It seems like a fair deal, doesn’t it?”

“Woah, hold on,” you protested, feeling a mix of shock and distress at Sunghoon’s proposal. “There’s absolutely no way I’m agreeing to this. I mean, we just met! Aren’t you trusting me, a stranger, a little too much now?”

Sunghoon shrugged nonchalantly, seemingly unfazed by your reaction. “It didn’t strike me as that crazy of an idea, but I guess humans are more sensitive about these things,” he remarked, surprised at how fast your voice was raised at him. “I don’t know why you’re so baffled now; you were the one who asked me to bite you.”

“Okay, that was clearly different! It was due to shock, alright?” you said, clearly not being able to rack up any responses to fire back.

“But, whatever! Anyway, as we were saying, of course it sounds crazy to me! You’re a vampire, not some ordinary person that I know. It’s not like I can trust you completely,” you shot back, your frustration becoming more evident.

“Look, I don’t even know your name.” You paused, realizing the absurdity of the situation. You two were getting into a heated conversation, trying to make deals, yet you both haven’t introduced yourselves properly.

“Oh, right—the name is Sunghoon, Park Sunghoon,” he interjected, his tone brimming with impatience. You swore if he wasn’t a stupid vampire, you would’ve knocked him out right there.

“And yours?” He interrupts your thoughts, his eyes gleaming with curiosity.

“It’s Y/N,” you replied, slightly taken aback by his abruptness.

“Nice to properly have a greeting with you, Y/N,” Sunghoon says with a slight smile. “Now, let's go back to our previous discussion, shall we?”

“Glad you mentioned that. So, exactly how is this deal supposed to work? Where would I even stay, and how often would I have to give my blood to you? Lord, who knows, you might kill me on my second day staying here!” you exclaimed, wanting to understand how shameless Sunghoon can be with his crazy thoughts.

“I understand your concerns about the deal. Let’s address them one by one, alright?” You nodded, willing to hear him out despite your concerns.

“As for where you’ll stay, you obviously don’t need to worry about that. I mean, how bad could it be?” he added with a smirk. “Consider it your sanctuary; don’t worry about anything.”

“And regarding the blood part,” he continued, his tone serious. “I assure you, I have no intention of killing you—well, I’ll try not to. We can establish some clear boundaries after you accept this deal. And we’ll figure out something where you can provide blood for me in controlled amounts.”

You furrowed your brow, still skeptical. “But why do you even need my blood? Can’t you just feed on others?”

Sunghoon sighed, his expression softening slightly. “It’s not as simple as that. I won’t go into all the details now, but let’s just say that your blood has a unique quality that appeals to vampires, especially me. It’s not something I can easily explain.”

You pondered his words for a moment, considering the possibilities. The idea of staying at this castle with a vampire, in fact many, was still unsettling, but you were running out of options.

“Fine,” you finally gave in. “I’ll give it a try. It's not like I can do anything anyway. But if anything feels off or if you break our agreement, I’m out.”

Sunghoon nodded, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Fair enough, Y/N. I’ll do my best to upload our agreement and ensure your safety.”

"Wait, so you’re telling me you put on the bandages and ointment for nothing?” you asked, touching the side of your neck.

“Oops,” he says, scratching the nape of his neck.

With that, a strange alliance between you and Sunghoon started to take shape, settling for a unique and uncertain journey ahead.

FIVE — the consequences

As the first night at Sunghoon’s place began, you couldn’t help but wonder how you had gotten yourself into this situation. It was clear that he hadn’t fully thought of a plan for your stay or how to ensure your safety amidst his unpredictable siblings.

Sunghoon, maintaining his composed demeanor, raced his mind as he contemplated the best course of action. Though Sunghoon lived in a spacious place with a huge room of his own, it became apparent that it was not designed to accommodate two people. After all, as a vampire, he would have never imagined sharing a room with a mere human, especially in a place he cherished deeply.

Sunghoon couldn’t help but feel a sense of unease, but he quickly pushed those thoughts aside. He reminded himself of the circumstances that brought you here, his promise to keep you safe, and the fact that this arrangement was temporary. He had to do something to make you feel comfortable; he isn’t that bad of a guy after all.

After a few moments of deep thought, he finally spoke up. “Y/N, I apologize for the lack of preparation. You see, I wasn’t expecting this at all.”

“Trust me, I wasn’t expecting this either, until you decided to kidnap me,” you joked, recalling the past moments and trying to tease him with it.

“I guess you’re right.” He scratched the back of his head awkwardly, smiling to himself as he remembered the past. “But here we are, working something out together.”

Sunghoon contemplated his thoughts, attempting to find a suitable solution. “Well, I guess you can just sleep on my bed.”

“What the hell are you saying? Me, sleeping on your bed?”

Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, surprised by your strong reaction. “What’s wrong with sleeping on my bed? Why do you seem so offended by the idea?” He blinks in confusion, not understanding the commotion with his idea. “You should consider this a luxury—even my siblings do! They rarely lay here, and I’m allowing you to.”

You crossed your arms, clearly uncomfortable with the suggestion. “It’s just...we barely know each other, and it feels too intimate to share a bed. Plus, it’s your personal space.”

Sunghoon tilted his head, feeling the need to tease you just a little bit. “Intimate? It’s just a bed; we are just sleeping on it. I don’t see it as a big deal. Besides, it’s a spacious bed, and I promise not to invade your personal space. What did you think was the intent behind my words?”

A mischievous smirk graced Sunghoon’s lips as he observed your cheeks turning a shade of red. Caught off guard by his response, you quickly cleared your throat, attempting to regain your composure. However, his gaze remained fixed on you, his smirk persisting, much to your annoyance.

You sighed, trying to find the right words. “Look, I appreciate your offer, but I think it’s best if we find another solution. I need my own space, and you should have yours too.”

“Alright, here’s the plan. You take the bed, and I’ll take the sofa. How does that sound?” Sunghoon proposes, trying to find a compromise.

“The sofa? Wouldn’t that be uncomfortable to sleep on for the night?” You voiced your concern, staring at the white sofa near his bed. It looked rather small, especially for his height.

“It can actually turn into a bed,” he reassured you.

“But I’ll feel bad if you have to sleep on the couch. Are you sure? We can always switch.” You protested, not easily accepting his kind act.

“Look, it’s either we both sleep on the same bed or I sleep on the couch. Keep arguing, and you’ll end up sleeping on the floor. Got it?” Sunghoon’s voice turned stern, attempting to make his point clear.

"...Understood," you reluctantly agreed, realizing his sudden change in mood.

You found yourself lying in Sunghoon’s bed, gazing up at the ceiling. The mattress was undeniably comfortable, but the unsettling atmosphere of the room made it difficult for you to drift off to sleep. Each time you closed your eyes, a chilly breeze seemed to brush against your body, further heightening your unease. This room was definitely not meant for humans to stay in.

Shifting slightly, you noticed Sunghoon’s silhouette remaining still in the darkness. His presence offered some sense of reassurance, but it wasn’t enough to completely dispel the unsettling feeling that hung in the air.

“Stop moving around so much; people might hear you,” Sunghoon whispered, his voice audible in the quiet room, causing you to freeze in your position. You didn’t know he was awake.

You remained silent for a moment, not sure if you should tell him the reason why. However, Sunghoon’s persistence broke the silence; his words were laced with a subtle attempt to gain your trust.

“No, I’m fine,” you replied, turning away from him and facing the other side of the bed.

“Sleep well, Y/N,” Sunghoon said, his voice echoing with the same enigmatic tone that had sent shivers down your spine when you first met.

In a way you couldn't quite understand, Sunghoon's presence was driving you to the edge of madness, albeit in a strangely captivating manner.

“So you’re suggesting I stay here for my entire stay?” you asked, still unsure of what had been planned by him.

“What? Would you rather be thrown into a bloodbath with six other vampires?” Sunghoon questioned you and was quite offended by your response.

“I think I’ll pass on that,” you replied, not eager to experience such a gruesome scenario. The thought of facing six vampires who were similar to Sunghoon, or even worse, sent a shiver down your spine. If they had possessed even a fraction of his intensity or darkness, you knew you would deeply regret your decision to stay. In fact, the idea seemed so terrifying that you would rather take matters into your own hands and end your own life than allow them to have a single drop of blood, Sunghoon included.

Ignoring the potential dangers ahead, you found yourself in his lavish library, with shelves overflowing with books. It was a comfortable and well-maintained space, with not a single speck of dust in sight. Picking up a nearby book, you asked, “You’re quite the reader, huh?”

You read the title, “How to Kill People : Guide for Vampires,” and quickly returned it to its original position. Sunghoon chuckled at your reaction, reminding you, “You’d probably see worse than that.”

His comment left you both intrigued and slightly unnerved, wondering what exactly he meant by it.

“Before I leave, let’s go over some rules I want to establish, shall we?” Sunghoon asks, only to get a nod from you. You hoped these rules weren’t going to be as bizarre as it was for you to be sleeping on Sunghoon’s bed for the whole stay.

Sunghoon dragged a nearby chair and settled himself into it. Resting his arms on the sides of the chair, he cleared his throat, preparing to lay down some ground rules.

"Rule Number One," he began sternly, pointing at you to emphasize his point, "you cannot leave this area until I say it's okay. As I mentioned earlier, I live with six other people who are extremely nosy. Any noise or disturbance will attract their attention, and they'll come running like meerkats trying to figure out what's going on."

You fought back a chuckle, imagining the scene he described, but you held it in, not wanting to upset Sunghoon by not paying attention.

"Rule Number Two," Sunghoon continued, his voice carrying a sense of seriousness, "is to never, and I mean never, expose yourself to them. They can get you killed in an instant, no joke. The last thing we need is another dead body lying around here, especially in my room."

You gulped, feeling a wave of unease wash over you. You nodded along to his words, but your mind began to wander, causing his instructions to fade into background noise. Your nods became automatic, hoping that he would finish speaking soon.

Sunghoon noticed your lack of focus, though he chose not to mention it. He debated whether to stop talking and address the issue or to continue and hope you would snap back to attention. Reluctantly, he decided to keep going, aware of the possibility that you were nodding along to nothing.

"...You got it?" he asked, his voice snapping you back to reality. You nodded and agreed, though you had no recollection of what he had just said. "Really? What did I say?"

You hesitated, realizing that you had completely missed his instructions. Sheepishly, you asked him to repeat it once more, hoping to catch up.

“We are going to be here for a long time, aren’t we?” Sunghoon let out a sigh, clearly disappointed.

He started from the beginning again, and this time, you made a conscious effort to pay attention.

At least that’s what he hoped you would do.

SIX — under his care

"You know, you're going to have to take care of me, right, Sunghoon?" You asked nervously, feeling the weight of your dependency on him.

"What do you mean? You should be able to take care of yourself," Sunghoon replied, seemingly indifferent to your needs.

“I need some food to survive being confined here; I’m not like you,” you pleaded, hoping he would understand.

"Oh. Take a blood packet," he suggested, opening a drawer to reveal a neatly arranged row of plastic packets. He quickly handed one to you, but you couldn't help but feel repulsed by the sight of the bright red liquid.

"I'm not a vampire, Sunghoon. I'm human. I need real food and water, not your blood packets," you protested, suppressing a gag.

"Oh, right," Sunghoon muttered awkwardly, realizing his oversight. He awkwardly moved closer, retrieving the blood packet from your lap and returning it to the drawer. He seemed to be slowly grasping the responsibility of caring for a human, but you couldn't shake the feeling that he resented it. The thought crossed your mind that he might even be contemplating killing you on the spot, and it sent a shiver down your spine.

“So…I’m supposed to hunt for you?” Sunghoon asked, sounding completely clueless about the needs of a human. “What kind of food do you guys enjoy?”

"I'm not really picky," you replied, trying to think of all the things you could eat.

"You're okay with raw animals?" he asked, clearly unaware of human dietary preferences.

"Are you trying to kill me?" you retorted, slightly alarmed by his suggestion.

"I'm sorry, I'm not really familiar with this," Sunghoon admitted, realizing his lack of knowledge.

"We eat warm, cooked foods. Sometimes when it’s cold, although it's not always enjoyable. You might need to cook something," you explained, hoping he would understand.

"Cook? The only thing I know is how to boil organs," Sunghoon confessed, his words never failing to make your jaw drop. He’s so unpredictable, you hate it.

"Enough of that," you said firmly, shaking your head to dispel the uncomfortable thoughts. "At least you can do something."

"You have to eat something cooked?" Sunghoon scrunched up his face, contemplating what the future held for him.

"Yes, that's what a normal human being needs," you replied.

"I'll figure something out. You're not picky, right?" Sunghoon asked, trying to reassure himself.

"Don't think I am," you responded, amused by his concern.

"I'll be back," he said, determination filling his voice.

"Don't take too long; I'm starving," you teased, sinking into Sunghoon's comfortable couch in the library and surrounding yourself with piles of books. You just hope he will do something right for once.

Leaving his room behind, Sunghoon let out a deep sigh of exasperation. Cooking a full meal that didn't involve blood was a daunting task for a vampire like him. The last thing he needed was to be caught in the act and subjected to endless questions from his nosy siblings. He moved swiftly and silently through the house, his senses heightened, ensuring that his movements remained undetected.

When Sunghoon opened the fridge, he wasn't surprised to find a limited selection of ingredients. After all, it was a typical vampire household with a preference for non-food items. Who would expect to see a fridge stacked with fresh produce? Luckily, among the assortment of mysterious meats, Sunghoon managed to unearth some ingredients courtesy of Heeseung's recent cooking practices. Heeseung seemed to have taken an interest in culinary pursuits, although the reason remained unknown.

"I'll keep it simple," Sunghoon muttered to himself, reaching for a container of eggs. Setting the eggs aside, he looks through the unorganized cupboards, looking at the scattered pots and pans. He cracked a few eggs into a bowl, whisking them with a fork. As he moved around the kitchen, the sound of clattering pans and plates filled the air, punctuated by brief pauses as he adjusted his movements to avoid making too much noise.

“What are you doing?” Heeseng’s voice rang out, laced with confusion, as he came to a sudden stop upon seeing one of his brothers actually cooking.

Sunghoon turned to face Heeseung, holding a pan in one hand and eggs in a bowl in the other. He couldn't help but feel a bit sheepish, caught in the act of preparing a meal.

“...Practicing?” Sunghoon shrugged, feeling a bit embarrassed about him catching him out here.

"You're making eggs? Want me to help? I can cook some meat or something." Heeseung offered, rolling up his sleeves. "Gotta get some protein for a guy like you." He flashed a smile and opened the fridge.

Sunghoon couldn't help but let out a quiet sigh, setting down the pan and bowl. Heeseung's easy-going nature reminded him why he was his favorite brother. Heeseung never questioned him unnecessarily and was always there to lend a hand when needed.

In no time, Heeseung finished cooking and guided Sunghoon through the steps. As he cleaned the countertop, he asked, "So, what made you want to try your hand at cooking?"

Sunghoon quickly tried to come up with an excuse, standing awkwardly with the dish in his hands. "Uhh...I've seen you cook multiple times and was curious. I thought I'd give it a try and see if I could make some real food. If it turns out good, maybe I'll start cooking more often."

"Ah, I see. Well, if you ever need any help or have any questions about cooking, my room is right next door," Heeseung offered.

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind...if you're home," Sunghoon replied, a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

As Sunghoon entered the library, he saw you lying on the couch, engrossed in a book, with a stack of books beside you. The sight of you brought a flutter to his heart, a feeling he couldn't quite explain. He greeted you and placed the dish on the table, letting out a sigh of relief.

"You have no idea what I just went through," he exclaimed, flopping face down onto the couch in front of you. You chuckled, and once again, he felt that ticklish sensation in his stomach. These random feelings were starting to puzzle him, but he pushed them aside and focused on your words.

"It's a shame you have to keep going through this," you remarked, surprised at how delicious the simple dish tasted.

Sunghoon sighed, realizing he would have to cook three meals like this every day and rely on Heeseung's help. However, he found himself not objecting to the idea. In fact, he rather liked it, though he couldn't quite figure out why.

SEVEN — unexpected encounter

As the days turned into weeks, the routine of sleeping in Sunghoon’s bed and spending time in the library continued. Sunghoon remained consistent in his actions, always bringing you food despite the strange glances he received from his siblings.

Engrossed in one of the books from Sunghoon’s collection, you heard the door creak open. Assuming it was Sunghoon returning, you began to express your relief, only to pause when you looked up and realized it wasn’t him standing near the door. Instead, it was a different guy—blond hair with bangs gracefully covering his forehead. He exuded an attractive presence with his tall physique and sharp features. Both you and the unknown guy shared a moment of shock, caught off guard by the unexpected encounter.

“I knew Sunghoon was hiding something!” he whispered to himself, unaware you could hear his words. He seemed rather happy that his prediction was correct rather than shocked by a random stranger at his house. “No wonder why that sweet scent lingers around his door,” he continues, pretending to act all smart.

“Um, who are you?” you questioned, trying to make sense of the situation.

“Oh right! The name is Jake. And yours?” he introduced himself and asked, offering a friendly smile. He seems way nicer than Sunghoon, as you thought.

“Y/N,” you said, offering the same smile back. He chuckles. “Nice to meet you, Y/N!”

“Dang, so Sunghoon was brave enough to keep a human hostage?” Jake remarked, clearly surprised that you even managed to live. The Sunghoon he knew would have sucked out all of your blood already. Were you that special to him?

“Where is he?” you inquired, wanting to know Sunghoon’s whereabouts. You couldn’t believe you’d be caring about someone you hated the first day you met him.

“Hunting, perhaps? Why, looking for some company?” Jake teased with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I don’t mind...” you responded, contemplating the idea of having some company while you waited for Sunghoon’s return.

“Don’t mind if I do!” Jake exclaimed enthusiastically, grabbing a book he had been eyeing from the shelf. He hurriedly made his way over to you, claiming the empty spot on the cough. His vibrant energy was surprisingly comforting, quickly making you forget that he was just a stranger a few moments ago.

“What brings you here?” you asked curiously, genuinely interested in his presence.

“I always sneak into Sunghoon’s library, even though he never explicitly allows it. Sometimes he’s fine with it, sometimes he’s not,” Jake explained with a slight pout, recalling past experiences. “Especially this week! He specifically told everyone to stay out of his room and the library because of some deep cleaning. It’s complete nonsense! He always shows up to my room uninvited and complains whenever I do the same.” He scoffs, closing the book for a quick moment.

You chuckled at his storytelling, finding yourself drawn into his narration. It was as if you were being hypnotized by his words. Jake glanced at you, noticing the way your eyes crinkled with amusement. His smile widened, and he felt surprisingly comfortable sharing snippets of his life with you.

You found yourself engrossed in constant conversation with Jake, losing track of time as it slipped through your fingers. He made your entire day in the library more bearable, and you enjoyed his company immensely.

"Sunghoon should be returning soon," Jake mentioned, unaware of how much time had passed. "I should probably leave now."

"Oh, but will you come back tomorrow?" You asked eagerly, hoping he would say yes.

"I'll try my best. Just promise me that you won't tell Sunghoon that I've been sneaking in here, okay?" Jake requested, his eyes searching yours for assurance.

"I promise," you replied sincerely.

"Pinky promise?" he suggested playfully.

"Absolutely, I can even come up with something to prove that my lips are sealed. Maybe I can offer you my blood? You know, to seal our deal." you added, having no harm behind your words.

"You're quite bold, aren't you?" he remarked, slightly taken aback by your audacity.

"Do you want to?" you asked, your voice teasing.

"Where would you like me to bite you?" he quipped back, playing along with your banter.

And with that, Jake left with a broad grin, bidding you farewell with a wave. You waved back, and as your sleeve rolled down, it revealed the two distinctive fang marks near your wrist, a reminder of the unusual encounters you've had lately.

You hoped Sunghoon wouldn’t bother to check your arms.

EIGHT — unwanted guests

As days turned into weeks, Sunghoon diligently continued making your meals, ensuring you had warm and cooked food to sustain yourself. He became more skilled in the kitchen with each passing day, and you couldn't help but appreciate his efforts. Despite the initial awkwardness, a sense of familiarity grew between you, and you found solace in his presence.

Meanwhile, you continued to meet Jake in the library, enjoying each other's company and engaging in conversations that ranged from lighthearted to deep. He became a source of comfort and distraction from the confinement of the vampire household. The stolen moments with Jake brought a sense of excitement and adventure to your otherwise mundane routine.

If you were going to be honest, it would’ve been difficult to choose who was better between the two. While you appreciated Sunghoon's care and the bond that was slowly forming between you, there was an unspoken understanding that your connection with Jake was something entirely different.

Despite the initial success of the plan, Sunghoon's peculiar behavior didn't go unnoticed by his siblings. They started to find it strange that he never left his room and continued to cook meals despite being a vampire who normally consumed blood.

As Sunghoon returned to his room, Sunoo made sure to close the door behind him, maintaining the air of secrecy. When he joined his brothers downstairs, their confusion and concern were evident.

"What's going on with Sunghoon?" Jungwon asked, his expression reflecting his bewilderment after returning from a short trip.

"I've been noticing it too. He's been like this for the past week," Niki chimed in, shaking his head in disbelief. "This is not his usual behavior."

"He's been acting strange, not just with the cooking but also isolating himself in his room," Jay chimed in, furrowing his brows. "I tried talking to him, but he just brushes me off."

"He even told me not to enter his room and to stay away from his library," Heeseung added, his voice filled with genuine confusion. "It's like he's hiding something."

Sunoo, who had just returned from escorting Sunghoon back to his room, couldn't shake off his own concerns. "I've been trying to protect him, keeping everyone away from his room," he admitted. "But I don't know what's going on either. Something feels off."

The brothers exchanged worried glances, realizing that Sunghoon's behavior was a cause for concern. They knew they needed to get to the bottom of it, not only for their own peace of mind but also for Sunghoon's well-being. They decided to confront him together, determined to uncover the truth behind his recent actions and offer him support if needed.

Little did they know that their investigation would reveal the hidden secret you and Jake shared, adding an unexpected twist to the situation and potentially reshaping their perception of Sunghoon forever.

Sunghoon overheard his brothers' worried conversation, their voices growing louder and catching his attention. Concern filled his mind as he realized they might discover his secret. In a state of panic, he darted around, desperately searching for a solution.

Finding you in the library, he hurriedly approached you, his face filled with urgency.

"You need to hide right now," Sunghoon urged, his voice hushed but filled with intensity.

Startled by his sudden request, you quickly set aside the book you were reading and stood up, ready to follow his lead.

"My brothers are onto me. They suspect something's not right," Sunghoon explained, glancing around nervously. He keeps staring at his door, trying to listen for any sudden noises. "I'm afraid they might come barging into my room. We can't let them find you."

You could see the worry in his eyes, and you understood the weight of the situation. Without hesitation, you followed Sunghoon's lead and looked around for a hiding spot.

"Where should I hide?" you asked, trying to remain calm.

Sunghoon scanned the room, his gaze landing on a large antique wardrobe tucked away in a corner.

"Quick, get inside there," he said, opening the wardrobe door and motioning for you to step inside. It was large enough to fit you and pretty hidden away from any of his siblings.

You hurriedly made your way into the wardrobe, squeezing yourself in and pulling the doors shut. It was a tight space, but you hoped it would provide enough cover.

As the brothers deliberated downstairs, their uncertainty apparent, Sunoo voiced his reservations about invading Sunghoon's privacy. Nervously fidgeting with his fingers, he expressed his concerns.

"I don't know about this. I just don't want to intrude on his personal space," Sunoo admitted, his voice filled with unease. "You know, maybe he's still trying to deal with the past.” He bit his lip, avoiding delving into the details of his troubling history.

Heeseung sighed, acknowledging the validity of Sunoo's thoughts. He too was unsure of what to do, caught between his curiosity and his desire to respect Sunghoon's boundaries. The situation left them all in a state of indecision, unsure of how to proceed.

"I'm still worried about his well-being," Jay voiced, with Jake nervously nodding in agreement. Jake's heart raced not only out of concern for Sunghoon but also out of fear of you and him getting caught in the midst of their investigation.

"Okay, let's go." Jungwon decisively took the lead, leading the way up the stairs. The rest of the brothers followed suit, their curiosity piqued as they contemplated what Sunghoon could potentially be hiding.

As they reached the top of the stairs, the brothers could sense the tension in the air. They approached Sunghoon's closed door, hesitating for a moment before Jungwon took a deep breath and knocked.

"Sunghoon, are you in there?" Jungwon called out, his voice filled with concern.

There was a brief moment of silence, and then Sunghoon's voice came from the other side, slightly shaky but composed. "Yes, I'm here. Give me a moment."

The brothers exchanged glances, their anticipation building. They knew something was off, and their worry for Sunghoon only grew stronger. As they waited for him to open the door, they couldn't help but wonder what they were about to uncover.

Sunghoon swung the door open, his mouth full of food, as he greeted his six brothers. "Whoa, what's the occasion for this surprise gathering?" he asked nonchalantly, trying to mask his unease.

The rest of the brothers exchanged puzzled glances, failing to detect any apparent change in Sunghoon's behavior. "Do you need something from me before I continue finishing my meal?" Sunghoon inquired, hoping they would take the hint and leave him be.

Niki stepped forward, his curiosity getting the better of him. "Do you mind if we come in?" he asked, voicing the question that had been on everyone's mind.

Sunghoon shrugged, reluctantly allowing them entry. "Sure, but just for a little while. I'd like to eat my meal in peace."

Sunghoon reluctantly stepped aside, allowing his brothers to enter his room. As they filed in, their eyes scanned the surroundings, trying to piece together the puzzle of Sunghoon's recent behavior. The room appeared relatively normal, with the plate of food he cooked on his table and an organized bed.

"What's been going on, Sunghoon?" Heeseung finally spoke up, his voice laced with concern.

“What do you mean? I’ve only tried new things; it’s been interesting, I’ll tell you that.” Sunghoon shrugged, pushing away Heeseung’s question.

"Would it be alright if we entered the library?" Jay proposed, and the six brothers turned their gaze towards Sunghoon.

Sunghoon forced a smile, concealing his anxiety behind a facade. "Of course, go ahead," he replied, his words betraying his true feelings. Deep down, he was terrified of being discovered, even though he had already hidden you away.

Jay reached for the doorknob, his hand trembling slightly as he cautiously opened the door. The brothers held their breath, unsure of what awaited them inside. Their curiosity had overridden any doubts or concerns.

As the door swung open, the brothers stepped into the library, their eyes scanning the room for any signs of unusual activity. Sunghoon tried his best to act nonchalant, with his heart pounding in his chest. He hoped that you had a good hiding spot and that his siblings wouldn't stumble upon any evidence of your presence.

The library appeared just as it always did: shelves filled with books, a cozy atmosphere enveloping the space. The brothers exchanged glances, perplexed by the situation. Everything seemed normal, except for Sunghoon's apprehensive demeanor.

"Smells...rather sweet," Jungwon says, surprised at how quickly he picked up on it. The others nodded in agreement, detecting the faint yet enticing scent in the air.

“Could it be from the cups?” Sunghoon points at them, thankfully coming up with a quick excuse.

Jungwon's face lit up with understanding, and he couldn't help but let out a small sigh of relief, followed by a chuckle. “Ah, you've got yourself some good blood there.”

The others continued to look around, not seeming to find anything suspicious.

"Are you sure there's nothing unusual going on here, Sunghoon?" Jake asked, a hint of suspicion in his voice. He had to look convincing to his brothers, at least.

Sunghoon shrugged, feigning innocence. "I'm just enjoying some alone time with my books," he replied, hoping his casual tone would deflect their attention.

The brothers continued to search the library, their footsteps echoing softly on the wooden floor. Sunghoon's anxiety grew with each passing moment, praying that his secret would remain hidden.

“Well, there’s nothing,” Jungwon says, finishing his search.

“Sunghoon, just know we care about you, and you can tell us anything, okay?” Heeseung says, making Sunghoon nod to his words.

“We will be leaving now; don’t spend too much time in your room,” Niki says, walking closer to the library’s exit. Finally, satisfied that nothing seemed out of the ordinary, all of the remaining brothers made their way back towards the library entrance. Sunghoon released a silent sigh of relief, grateful that they hadn't discovered your presence.

Sunghoon had nothing else to say but nod his head, wishing his brothers a short goodbye. As the door closed behind them, Sunghoon leaned against it, his body trembling with a mix of fear and relief. He knew he had narrowly escaped being caught, but he also realized that he would have to be even more careful moving forward.

Turning his attention to you, he approached your hiding spot with a mixture of concern and gratitude. "You can come out now," he whispered, a grateful smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "We managed to keep them away, at least for now."

How long will this thing last before the secret is out?

NINE — unbreakable cycle

Sunghoon's recent behavior has left you puzzled. Lately, he has been requesting your blood more frequently, surpassing his usual once or twice a week routine. Not only that, you started feeling a bit tired too, having both Sunghoon and Jake take your blood whenever they wanted.

"Y/N, I need more," Sunghoon said, entering the library with a breathlessness that hinted at an intense workout session. His exhaustion was evident, as if he had been pushing himself too hard in his training.

Concerned by Sunghoon's increased requests for your blood and his apparent exhaustion, you couldn't help but worry about his well-being. You set aside the book you were reading and approached him with a furrowed brow.

"Sunghoon, are you okay? You seem really tired," you remarked, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Is something bothering you?"

Sunghoon sighed heavily, leaning against the library wall for support. His gaze met yours, reflecting a mix of weariness and determination.

"I've been pushing myself harder lately," he admitted, his voice tinged with fatigue. "I've been training more intensely, trying to improve my abilities. But it's taking a toll on me. I’ll be fine with a little bit of blood, though."

"Sunghoon, maybe you should take a break," you suggested gently. "Rest and recuperate. Pushing yourself too hard might do more harm than good."

"Thank you, Y/N." He let out a small, quiet chuckle, feeling a bit strange for you to be caring for him right now. "I'm assuming you're tired too? You look like it; it seems like you've been draining all your energy for more than one person."

"How did you know?" you asked, taken aback by his observation.

"What? I was just teasing," Sunghoon replied, his chuckle fading as he sensed your surprise.

Shit. You inwardly cursed your slip-up, realizing you had revealed more than intended.

"Who have you been seeing?" Sunghoon's tone turned stern, his eyes searching yours for answers.

You awkwardly laughed, trying to brush off his suspicions. "I was just joking, Sunghoon. There's no one else."

But Sunghoon wasn't convinced. He could sense the subtle changes in your heartbeat and the uneasiness in your eyes. The trust between you seemed to falter, and he couldn't ignore the nagging feeling that something was amiss.

"Your heart is beating faster," he pointed out, his voice tinged with a hint of betrayal. "Who have you been seeing behind my back? Why can't you be honest with me?"

"Why does it have to concern you?" you replied defensively, feeling a surge of frustration. The tension in the room escalated as both of you struggled to communicate your true feelings.

"It's my room," Sunghoon retorted, his voice growing louder with anger. "You've been hiding something from me, and now you're avoiding giving me your blood. Is this all because of one of my brothers?"

The words hung in the air, a bitter realization dawning on both of you. Sunghoon's protective instincts clashed with the sense of betrayal he felt, while you grappled with the weight of your secrets.

Sunghoon's grip tightened on your wrist, causing a sharp sting and making you instinctively try to pull away. As you did, the pressure on the bite mark caused a slight seepage of blood, staining your sleeve. He stared at the blood with a mix of shock and confusion.

"Did—did one of my brothers do that?" Sunghoon asked, his voice filled with disbelief as he looked back at you. A whirlwind of emotions swept across his face.

"It's nothing. Just mind your own business," you scowled, your frustration evident as you continued to struggle against his grip, wanting to break free.

Sunghoon's eyes narrowed, his anger rising. "How can you expect me to ignore this?” Sunghoon clenched his fists, his anger boiling over. He clearly allowed it to take the best of him, not knowing there could be other ways to talk about this. "I can't believe you would lie to me like this! How could you hide something so important?"

You stood your ground, your own anger rising to match his. Why would you want to allow him to be the only one who could yell? “You don’t have to know everything. You probably see me as a burden anyway.”

"Burden? You think I see you as a burden?" Sunghoon's voice was filled with frustration. "I've done everything I can to protect you and keep you safe. And this is how you repay me?"

"I didn't ask for your protection! Look, I’m glad for your help, but what’s with the big fuss?" You shot back, your voice trembling with anger and hurt. "You think you're the only one who has sacrifices to make?"

Sunghoon's face was twisted with anger and hurt. “Since you think my brothers are so great, why don’t you just leave right now? Let them have you! Then you would know what it feels like to be abandoned!"

"You don't owe me, Sunghoon. God, just because you're some vampire, do you think you're superior? I wonder how your family even manages to deal with you," You say, returning the same harsh tone he gave you.

The words stung, hitting him like a punch to the gut. You hadn't meant to belittle him, but in the heat of the argument, it felt like the only way to defend yourself.

Sunghoon's expression hardened, his anger giving way to a deep sadness. Your words only brought back his past, making him wince. He turned away from you, his voice filled with a mix of frustration and hurt. "Is that really what you think of me? Just some stuck-up vampire who thinks he's superior?"

Tears welled up in his eyes, and his voice choked with emotion. "I've done everything to make you feel welcomed and loved; well, I tried, and this is how you see me? I never wanted you to feel like that."

The realization hit you like a wave, crashing down your walls of anger. You hadn't meant to reduce him to a stereotype and make him feel unappreciated for all he had done for you.

"I– I didn't mean it like that," you mumbled, your voice filled with regret. "I was just angry and hurt. I didn't think about how my words would affect you."

Sunghoon shook his head, his shoulders slumping with the weight of his emotions. "It's too late now. I can't forget what you said or how you made me feel."

As he walked away, shutting the door with a resounding thud, the silence in the room was suffocating, the realization of the damage you had caused sinking in.

What the hell was that about, and why do you feel guilty?

Great, there's more stuff that you need to take care of.

Guilt was starting to eat you alive, and you had to do something about it quickly.

And how will you do that? It’s simple—asking his sibling for help.

Jake.

TEN — the plan

To your luck, Jake managed to sneak into the library, closing the door quietly behind him. His eyes widened as he looked at you, sensing the tension in the air. He walked closer, whispering to you.

"What's going on with Sunghoon?"

You sighed, the weight of the argument still lingering in your mind. "We had a big fight. Things got really heated between us."

Jake furrowed his brows, concern etched on his face. "What happened?”

"We had an argument about you," you said, wincing as the incident kept replaying in your head. You didn’t want to tell him everything; guilt was just starting to take over you again.

"Me? What about me?" Jake asked, his expression turning serious as he took a seat next to you.

"He found out," you replied, pulling down your sleeves to reveal the fang marks on your arm. "He found our secret meetings."

Jake's eyes widened in realization, and his voice filled with concern. "He knows about us? So was that why he glared at me all day?” Jake says, finally piecing the puzzle together.

“How did he react?"

"He was furious," you confessed, your voice filled with regret. "He accused me of betraying his trust and hiding things from him."

Jake sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I never wanted things to get so complicated. I'm sorry, Y/N."

"It's not your fault," you reassured him, placing a comforting hand on his. "We both made mistakes. I should have been more honest with him from the beginning."

Jake nodded, his gaze filled with a mix of guilt and determination. "We need to find a way to fix this, to make things right with Sunghoon.

"But how? He probably hates me now," you said, frustration evident in your voice as you rubbed your head with your hand.

"He doesn't hate you. He probably never will. You just have to be the first one to reach out and talk to him," Jake reassured you, his hand comforting you as he rubbed your back. "Trust me, he's seemed really happy ever since you got here."

"Really?" you asked, a glimmer of hope in your eyes.

"Really," Jake confirmed with a nod.

"Okay, so how am I going to apologize?" You asked, eager to find a way to make things right.

"I have a plan," Jake said, a mischievous smile playing on his lips.

Curiosity sparked within you as you leaned in, urging him to share his idea.

Jake leaned in closer, his voice lowering to a whisper as he shared his plan with you. His eyes gleamed with a mix of excitement and mischief, making you curious about the details of his scheme.

"Here's what we're going to do," Jake began, his voice filled with confidence. "We'll organize a surprise gathering for Sunghoon, something that will catch him off guard when he sees you walk to him instead. I’ll tell him how I need to talk to him.”

You listened intently, nodding as Jake outlined the steps of the plan. It involved a lot of convincing. Sunghoon knew one of his brothers knew you; he just didn’t know which one. Despite his possible anger toward one of them, he’s going to have to speak to them, not wanting to expose the secret of you being here.

"And when the time is right, you can seize the moment and apologize to him sincerely, letting him know how much he means to you." Jake explained.

A mix of anticipation and nervousness filled your chest, but you felt a glimmer of hope. It seemed like a thoughtful and heartfelt gesture that could mend the rift between you and Sunghoon.

"Are you in?" Jake asked with a hint of excitement in his eyes.

With a shared sense of determination, you and Jake began to put the plan into action, eagerly looking forward to the opportunity to make amends and rebuild the trust that had been fractured.

You had to make things right again.

ELEVEN — making up

“Are you ready to talk to him?” Jake asked, sensing your nervous behavior.

"I believe so," you replied with a sigh. "I've allowed him enough time to process."

"Okay, I'll inform him before he comes upstairs," Jake said. You nodded nervously, fidgeting in your seat as you awaited the opportune moment to reveal yourself.

Before you knew it, you heard footsteps ascending the stairs, approaching Sunghoon's room. Holding your breath, you waited for the perfect moment to exit the room.

You opened the door, revealing a fatigued Sunghoon perched on his bed, awaiting Jake's arrival.

"Sunghoon?" You called out his name, causing his eyes to widen. He averted your gaze, not quite ready to meet your eyes. A part of him yearned for a conversation with you, while another part hesitated, unsure of the outcome.

Taking control of the situation, Sunghoon cleared his throat and spoke, his tone detached: "YN, you should return. Jake could return at any moment."

You were hesitant about carrying out the plan; it would reveal who you’ve been seeing for the past few weeks.

But you gathered your courage and walked further toward him, taking a seat beside him on his bed.

Sunghoon's gaze shifted from the floor to you, his eyes searching for answers. You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the conversation that was about to unfold.

"I'm sorry, Sunghoon," you spoke up, your voice filled with sincerity. "I should have been honest with you from the beginning. I never wanted to hide anything from you, but I was scared. Scared of causing any conflicts between you and your family. I thought hiding it was the best thing I could do.”

“I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that or said anything harsh to you. You didn’t deserve it,” you continued, looking back to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

Sunghoon's features softened, and he moved closer, his eyes locking with yours. "Y/N, I didn't handle the situation well either," he admitted, his voice filled with remorse. "I let my anger get the best of me, and I'm sorry for hurting you."

"I just... didn't want to talk to you after you made me think about my past,” Sunghoon sighed, feeling the weight of his experiences. He found himself unexpectedly opening up to you, trusting you with a part of his life he had never shared with anyone before.

Closing his eyes, he allowed the memories to resurface, replaying the painful moments from his past.

"I'm exhausted from constantly taking care of you. Why can't you be normal and not some damned vampire?" Sunghoon's father's voice reverberated in his mind, filled with anger and frustration.

"I'm sorry, Father. I just haven't had anything to fill me up. Not even regular food. I feel myself growing weaker day by day," Sunghoon confessed, his voice tinged with sadness as he recalled the desperate need for blood.

"You're fortunate that your mother and I provide for you. Who else would? But god, I can’t handle having such a freak in the house,” his father continued, reaching for his phone and dialing his mother's number. "I have to do something about you."

"What do you mean?" Sunghoon's fear intensified, unsure of what his father intended. "Father? Father!" he pleaded, trying to push him away, but his father remained fixated on the call to his mother. Sunghoon sat there in resignation, realizing that his true family was willing to abandon him or, worse, even consider harming him.

After hours of intense discussion between his parents, Sunghoon's heart sank as his mother called him over. He hoped against hope that he would be able to stay, praying for a positive outcome. Taking a seat in front of his parents, he braced himself for the verdict, hoping it would be in his favor.

"Sunghoon... I'm sorry, but you can't stay here anymore." His mother's voice trembled with sadness, and her eyes filled with tears. "It's just not possible. It’s not safe.”

“You can’t just throw me out like that!” Sunghoon's voice wavered with a mix of sadness and frustration, unable to comprehend how his own parents could abandon him. "I'm your child!"

"You're not our child—well, my child. You're just some wretched vampire who has no place in this household. Who knows what harm you could bring to your other siblings?" His father's words were laced with bitterness, his tone devoid of any remorse as he witnessed his son's disbelief and hurt.

He sat there, his mind filled with shock and a deep sense of loss, as he watched his mother pack up his belongings. After leaving his family home, Sunghoon's life took a drastic turn. He found himself in a state of constant turmoil, resorting to feeding off random animals he came across in a forest. If it hadn't been for Heeseung's intervention, he might still be wandering the streets, struggling to survive.

"But unlike my past parents, my siblings here embraced me wholeheartedly. They provided me with a sense of safety and acceptance that I had never experienced before," Sunghoon explained, his voice tinged with vulnerability and the hope that you would understand his deep-seated trauma.

"Oh my god, Sunghoon, I'm so sorry," you exclaimed, overcome with regret as the weight of your words and their impact on him sank in. "I had no idea about your past and what you went through."

Sunghoon's smile softened, touched by your genuine remorse. "It's alright. I never expected you to know or bring it up. We can leave it in the past now," he said, a sense of relief evident in his voice.

He reached out for your hand, his hands trembling slightly. “I forgive you. Do you forgive me?” You smiled, reaching out and taking his hands into yours. “I do.”

The weight of the tension that had been lingering between you lifted, replaced by a sense of relief and renewed hope. You and Sunghoon slowly embraced, holding each other tightly, letting the healing process begin.

Jake smiled, quietly slipping out of the room, leaving the two of you to mend the bonds that had been strained. As you and Sunghoon held each other, you knew that despite the challenges you had faced, your love for each other was stronger than ever, ready to face whatever lay ahead.

Next time, there will be no more misunderstandings.

You were going to make sure of that.

TWELVE — secret revealed

"You know, your brothers are eventually going to figure out that you keep me here, right?" you remarked, laying on Sunghoon's lap. Despite the mixed signals between you, there was a sense of comfort in your connection, and you both secretly wished for more.

Sunghoon chuckled, his fingers tracing gentle patterns through your hair as he continued reading his book. "You think so?”

“It has been quite a while. You think they would be okay with the sudden news?" You asked.

"They better," he replied with a playful smirk.

"I hope they'll be comfortable with it." you said, still filled with worries.

"They should be. One of my brothers already knows you, so that's one less person to convince," Sunghoon said, his tone lightening the mood.

"Ah, Jake," you nodded, feeling a sense of relief. "And just to clarify, we are not offering blood to my brothers to win them over. Just putting it out there," he added, making you roll your eyes playfully.

“Blood is only yours.”

“That’s quite flattering coming from a human like you.”

"Oh, stop it—tell your brothers about us whenever you feel like it’s time.”

“Like right now?”

“Well, do you want to?”

“I’ll ask them to come upstairs.”

"Sure, go ahead," you replied, lifting your head from Sunghoon's lap and adjusting your position. You watched as he stood up and made his way towards the door, calling out to his brothers to join him upstairs.

As you waited for them to arrive, a mix of anticipation and nervousness filled the room. You couldn't help but wonder how they would react to your relationship with Sunghoon. Would they be accepting? Would they hate your guts? Only time will tell.

Soon, you heard footsteps approaching the room, and one by one, Sunghoon's brothers entered. They glanced at you in shock, stopping in their tracks besides Jake.

Jay furrowed his brows, puzzled by the presence of a human in Sunghoon's room. The sweet scent emanating from you intrigued him, adding to his curiosity. "Who is this?" he asked, his confusion evident.

"This is YN," Sunghoon replied, observing Jay's expression as he connected the dots. "She's the person you saw me carrying on my shoulder."

Recognition dawned on Jay's face. "Ah, so you're her!"

"Well, that's certainly surprising. A human living here with us." Sunoo chimed in, happy that his suspicions were correct after all.

Niki's eyes widened in astonishment. "Wait, she's been here for months? How is she not freaked out by all of us being vampires?"

"Right...you're human. Aren't you scared or uncomfortable being around vampires?" Heeseung asked, with a hint of confusion and amusement in his tone.

You remained calm, unaffected by their supernatural nature. "To be honest, it was a bit overwhelming at first. But, after a while, Sunghoon seemed chill, making me think you all would be the same.”

The room fell into a momentary silence as everyone but Sunghoon and Jake processed the unexpected situation. It was clear that your presence had caught them off guard.

Jungwon couldn't help but offer a lighthearted remark. "So that sweet scent was yours. Well, well, who would've thought a human would willingly enter our world?"

You chuckled, feeling at ease in their presence. "I guess I'm an exception."

Jake, who had been aware of your connection with Sunghoon, smiled warmly. "We're glad to have you here, YN. It's refreshing to see someone who embraces us for who we are."

Sunghoon placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "I couldn't have asked for a better family, and I'm grateful that you all accept YN."

Niki shook his head in disbelief, still processing the revelation. "I can't believe I only found out about this now. Sunghoon, you really kept this secret well."

Jake, unable to resist adding some mischief, chimed in with a cheeky smile. "Well, I already knew about it."

His statement caused a range of reactions among the others. Some looked at Jake with astonishment, while others couldn't help but let out a shocked gasp.

"You knew too?!" Sunoo exclaimed, his eyes wide with surprise.

Jake simply shrugged, enjoying the reaction he was getting. "Yeah, I've known for a while. I guess Sunghoon didn’t find out that I knew about YN until a week ago."

Jay shook his head, finding the situation amusing. "I can't believe you two managed to keep this from us. Secrets, secrets everywhere."

Sunghoon placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "I couldn't have asked for a better family, and I'm grateful that you all accept YN."

As the initial shock subsided, the room filled with a mix of laughter and teasing remarks. It seemed that despite the surprise, they were all eager to accept the new dynamic and embrace you as part of their vampire family.

“Since our Sunghoon has taken an interest in you, we accept you here.” Heeseung smiled, noticing how Sunghoon would look at you with such loving eyes. It was amusing but weird to see his brother act in such a way, but it made him feel pleased.

Feeling a sense of warmth and acceptance, you realized that you had truly found a home with these vampires, a place where you wished to stay forever.

THIRTEEN — transforming

"Sunghoon, have you ever thought about turning YN into a vampire?" Heeseung's curiosity was piqued as he prepared a meal downstairs while you were sleeping. He couldn't help but wonder about the possibility of Sunghoon turning you into a vampire.

Sunghoon's response was immediate, with a hint of surprise in his voice. "No, why would I?"

Heeseung's expression turned serious as he voiced his concern. "But she's human. Are you prepared to watch someone you love age and eventually pass away?"

Sunghoon's features shifted, his realization dawning upon him. The idea that you couldn't remain with him forever settled heavily in his mind. "Oh, I hadn't truly considered that. But what are the chances of a successful transformation? And if I were to proceed, how would I even do it?"

Heeseung paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "The chances of a successful transformation can vary. It depends on factors such as blood compatibility and the individual's willingness to undergo the process. Turning someone into a vampire is a complex undertaking that should be approached with great care."

Sunghoon absorbed Heeseung's words, his mind racing with possibilities. "If there's a way to turn YN into a vampire, and if it's something she genuinely desires, I would be willing to explore that option. However, it's a decision that we would need to make together, considering all the risks and consequences involved."

Heeseung offered an encouraging smile, understanding the weight of Sunghoon's contemplation. "I have faith that you'll find a way, Sunghoon. Just remember to have open and honest communication with YN and support each other in whichever path you choose."

Sunghoon nodded gratefully, appreciating his brother's guidance. He knew he could rely on his brothers for wisdom and support as he navigated the complexities of your relationship.

“I’ll talk to her about it when she wakes up,” Sunghoon says, bringing the plate of food to his room.

Gently whispering your name, Sunghoon noticed you were still peacefully asleep. A smile graced his lips as he approached the table, carefully setting the prepared food down before settling himself beside you.

As he brushed away a few strands of hair from your face, he couldn't help but be captivated by your beauty. A stirring feeling fluttered in his stomach—an undeniable effect you had on him that he couldn't ignore.

His fingers continued to play with your hair as your eyes slowly opened, revealing a pair of curious and sleepy eyes that met his. A smile formed on your face as you took in the sight of him smiling back at you.

“Did you sleep well?” He asked, his gaze never leaving you. You nod, snuggling in closer to the blanket, letting a small chuckle escape from his mouth.

“I need to tell you something, but eat and freshen up first, okay?” Curiousity took over, making you nod as you got out of bed.

As you finished your meal, you couldn't help but notice Sunghoon's slightly nervous demeanor. The anticipation grew within you, and you decided to break the silence.

"What do you want to say to me?" you asked, wiping your mouth with a napkin. Your eyes were fixated on him, searching for answers in his expression.

"Have you ever wanted to turn into a vampire?" Sunghoon finally brought up the question, hoping to gauge your thoughts on the matter.

You pondered his question for a moment, reflecting on your past perceptions and current feelings. "It seemed cool and everything when I was younger, like in the movies. But now, I'm not so sure about it," you admitted, voicing your uncertainties. "Why do you ask?"

Sunghoon took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts before responding. "I've been thinking about it lately—about the possibility of turning you into a vampire," he confessed, his eyes searching yours for a reaction.

You blinked in surprise, caught off guard by his thoughts. The idea had never crossed your mind before, and now it hung in the air between you, laden with implications and questions.

"Why would you consider that?" you asked, a mix of curiosity and apprehension in your voice.

Sunghoon's gaze softened, and he reached out to gently hold your hand. "Because I can't imagine a future without you, YN. Turning you into a vampire would mean we could be together forever. I don't want to watch you grow old and leave this world while I remain the same."

A whirlwind of emotions swirled within you as you processed his words. The thought of eternal life was both alluring and daunting. You thought about the sacrifices and challenges that would come with such a transformation, but also the promise of everlasting love and companionship.

"I need time to think about this, Sunghoon," you replied honestly, your voice tinged with uncertainty. "It's a big decision, and there's so much to consider."

He nodded understandingly, his grip on your hand tightening slightly. "Of course, YN. Take all the time you need. I just wanted to open up this conversation and let you know what's been on my mind."

Hours turned into days and weeks. After pondering about it for a while, you decided to talk about it with Sunghoon. "Sunghoon, I've made up my mind," you said, your voice steady. "I want to be with you, and if becoming a vampire means we can be together for eternity, then I'm willing to take that step."

A mixture of relief and joy washed over Sunghoon's face as he squeezed your hand. "Thank you, Y/N. I can't express how much this means to me," he whispered, his voice filled with gratitude.

"Okay, I don't want to scare you, but part of the transformation process would involve you drinking my blood regularly," Sunghoon explained, gesturing towards his sharp teeth. "It's how you'll develop your own fangs and embrace your vampire nature."

You couldn't help but feel a slight shiver of unease at the thought. Drinking blood was far from your comfort zone, as your experiences with blood were limited to minor accidents and dental procedures.

"It does sound a bit intimidating," you admitted, your voice tinged with apprehension. "I've never done anything like that before."

Sunghoon nodded understandingly, realizing the unfamiliarity of the concept to you. "I completely understand your concern. It's a significant step, but I assure you, I'll be there to guide you through it every step of the way."

He gently took your hand, his touch offering a sense of reassurance. "We'll start slowly, with small amounts. I'll make sure you're comfortable and safe throughout the process. You won't be alone in this."

His words, coupled with his caring demeanor, helped alleviate some of your worries. You began to consider the possibilities that lay ahead.

"I appreciate your support, Sunghoon," you replied, mustering up courage. "If this is what it takes to be with you and embark on this journey, I'm willing to give it a try."

Sunghoon's eyes lit up with gratitude and love. "Thank you, Y/N. Your trust means the world to me," he expressed, his voice filled with genuine warmth.

"Let's start, shall we?" Sunghoon smiled, gently taking your hands in his. You nodded, watching him get up and get a cup. "You can look away if you want."

Choosing to avert your gaze, you listened intently as the sound of blood pouring into the cup filled the air. It was a strange and surreal moment, knowing that soon you would be consuming that very substance. Your heart raced, but you trusted Sunghoon's guidance and the new love that you two were creating.

The clinking sound of the cup being placed on the table made you turn your head, catching a glimpse of Sunghoon as he healed his cut with his vampire abilities. It was a fascinating display, reminding you of the extraordinary world you were about to become a part of.

Your eyes shifted back to the cup, anxiety creeping in once more. Sensing your worries, Sunghoon reached out to reassure you. "Don't worry, Y/N. Just think of it as a cup of wine," he suggested, his voice soothing and comforting. "An expensive and rare kind that you can't get anywhere else."

His words brought a hint of lightheartedness to the situation, and a small smile formed on your lips. Sunghoon's ability to find humor even in unconventional circumstances was one of the things you admire about him.

Taking a deep breath, you mentally prepared yourself for what lay ahead. As you lifted the cup to your lips, the scent of blood filled your senses, mixing with a hint of excitement and fear. You closed your eyes and took a small sip, feeling the warm liquid glide down your throat.

The taste was distinct and unlike anything you had experienced before. It carried a primal energy tinged with a hint of sweetness. As you swallowed, a surge of energy coursed through your body, awakening these random senses.

As you placed the cup back on the table, your eyes met Sunghoon’s. He smiled and was glad you didn’t back out. This was only the start, and Sunghoon would gladly walk that path with you.

FOURTEEN — always forever

Sunghoon's voice trembled with concern as he pleaded, "Please, Y/N, you need to drink this as well." You lay in his bed, eyes tightly shut, consumed by fear and doubt.

"I'm really scared, Sunghoon. I don’t know what’s happening to me," you confess, your voice quivering. Cold beads of sweat trickle down your forehead as the symptoms of the transformation continue to unsettle you. The thought of relying on blood for sustenance forever sends a chill down your spine. "I don't want to spend eternity feeding on blood."

"I understand your fears, Y/N," Sunghoon spoke softly, his voice filled with compassion. He grabs a cloth, wiping off the sweat on your forehead. “This feeling is only temporary. After this, you’ll be back to normal again, just with new abilities and drinking blood.”

He watches you open your eyes, looking at the cup of blood on the nightstand. The blood started to increase more and more daily, making you feel worried.

"Once the transformation is complete, you'll gain better control over your vampire instincts and abilities," he explained, his voice gentle yet reassuring. “You can’t just die on me here, just because you don’t want some blood. We made a promise.”

“I don’t know…” Fear was starting to eat you alive, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to continue this. You felt like dying; these new abilities were starting to take over your body. You felt your teeth shifting and your body stirring with random feelings—you had no control over your body.

It took a while for you to realize the process wasn’t pretty. The thought of relying on blood for sustenance sent shivers down your spine, and the mere idea of an eternal existence dependent on it felt overwhelming.

Sunghoon noticed you felt like giving up. He prays that you wouldn’t; he couldn’t bear seeing you leave, especially after trying out his idea. He found himself falling for you; it was impossible to get out now.

He reached for your hand, pouring out his true emotions. "But please remember that I love you. I have never felt this way before, and I can't imagine my life without you. This transformation is a means for us to be together and embrace our future. It won't define our entire existence."

His words reached the deepest corners of your soul, stirring emotions that intertwined with your fears. The intensity of his love and the profound connection you shared offered a glimmer of hope amidst the darkness of uncertainty.

"But Sunghoon," you whispered, your voice trembling with vulnerability, "what if I can't handle it? What if I can't adapt? I don't want to lose myself or hurt anyone."

Sunghoon's hand gently cupped your face; his touch was warm and reassuring. "Y/N, I have complete faith in you," he declared, his voice filled with unwavering belief. "You're strong, and together we'll navigate this journey. I'll be by your side every step of the way, guiding and supporting you."

His eyes locked with yours, their depth revealing his sincerity. "You're not alone in this, Y/N. I’ll be yours always and forever.”

Tears streamed down your cheeks as you absorbed his words, feeling the weight of his love and commitment. Though your fears still lingered, his unwavering support brought you solace and reminded you of the extraordinary bond you shared.

With a trembling hand, you reached for the cup, your gaze never leaving Sunghoon's. As you took a sip, his tender smile filled you with a sense of courage. It was the strength of your love that would carry you through the uncertainties, assuring you that together you could overcome any obstacle.

In that moment, you knew that your love for each other would be the guiding light amidst the darkness. As you embarked on this transformative journey, you held onto the belief that love could conquer all and that with Sunghoon by your side, there was nothing you couldn't face.

From that point forward, you mustered the strength to confront your fear of blood. There were moments when the metallic taste in your mouth became overwhelming, and you longed for a different existence. However, with Sunghoon's unwavering support and guidance, you persevered.

As time passed, you noticed the unmistakable signs of your transformation. Your once ordinary teeth have now sharpened into the iconic fangs of a vampire, marking your departure from humanity. It was a strange and exhilarating feeling, knowing that you were no longer the same as before. Sunghoon observed your progress with pride, a smile dancing on his lips as he witnessed your remarkable adaptation.

Under Sunghoon's patient instruction, you embarked on training sessions together. He taught you how to harness your newfound invisibility and leverage your enhanced speed to capture your future prey with precision. Although you made occasional missteps and errors, Sunghoon remained a pillar of calm and support, always offering gentle guidance, unlike his interactions with his own brothers.

Together, you honed your skills, learning the delicate balance between strength and restraint. Sunghoon's understanding and empathy fostered an environment of trust and growth. With each passing day, you grew more confident in your abilities, emboldened by the unwavering belief Sunghoon had in you.

"You're doing great," Sunghoon reassured you, his words instilling a surge of confidence within you.

"You think so?" you asked, seeking affirmation.

"Yes, absolutely," Sunghoon replied with a warm smile. "You're adapting to this new life with remarkable ease. It's truly impressive, even more than I could have imagined."

His genuine praise filled you with a sense of pride and accomplishment. Hearing such words of encouragement from Sunghoon, who had experienced the vampire transformation himself, meant the world to you. It reaffirmed that you were not alone in this journey and that your progress was real and significant.

Sunghoon's unwavering support gave you the strength to push beyond your limits and embrace the challenges that came with your newfound abilities. With each step forward, you grew more confident in your capacity to navigate the vampire world alongside him.

"Thank you for being so patient with me, Sunghoon," you said, a genuine smile gracing your lips.

"Of course, YN," Sunghoon replied, his own smile mirroring yours. "I'll always be here for you, ready to offer my support and guidance whenever you need it."

His words resonate deeply within you, reaffirming the strength of your bond. Sunghoon's unwavering patience and dedication have been instrumental in your transformation journey. He had never faltered in his commitment to helping you navigate this new world and discover the extent of your potential as a vampire.

With Sunghoon by your side, you felt an unspoken sense of security and assurance. He had become more than just a mentor or guide; he was a pillar of strength, a source of comfort, and a confidant who understood you in ways no one else could.

As you gazed into his eyes, you knew that this journey was not just about becoming a vampire. It was about the profound connection and trust that had blossomed between you. And with each passing day, your gratitude for Sunghoon's unwavering presence in your life only grew stronger.

ENHA PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @ixomiyu @yenavrse @shinsou-rii @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @yenqa @dimplewonie @bubblytaetae @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @starcubes @starikizs @wonioml @chirokookie @xiaoderrrr @neozon3nha @en-chantedtomeetyou @millksea @enhaz1 @eundiarys @woon2u @ja4hyvn @judeduartewannabe @j-wyoung @thia-aep @vampcharxter @softpia @officiallyjaehyuns @itsactuallylina @hsheart @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @hanienie @jwnghyuns @kpoplover718 @jiawji @rikizm @haknom @yeokii @wvnkoi @tnyhees @teddywonss

TAGLIST FOR BITE ME — @soov @lunacrtk @differentchildwombat @amortenha @kyungssem @skinnyzlegendz

02:57pm — park sunghoon

0.5k words … fluff …. a bit suggestive …lowercase intended … rated pg13 … listen to love me like that by sam kim

for a pair who called themselves academic rivals, you and park sunghoon shouldnt have been in the janitors closet, bunking one of your most favourite classes, just to have his lips against yours for a few minutes.

but oh the way he held you, the way he kissed you like he could never do so again, you decided missing a few minutes of biology wouldnt really affect your perfect grades much.

sunghoons lips moved away from yours, and you couldnt wait for him to put it back on yours once again. he didnt take his hands off you, his grip just as tight as before, now just a bit softer, rubbing circles on the side of your waist. you feel your face redding more than ever, from his intense gaze on you.

“stop looking at me like that” you breathe out, still in a bit of a daze from all the kissing. he smiles “like what?” you hit his chest playfully, giggling and then looking into his eyes, only to see how soft his gaze was. you sucked in a breath, gasping at how incredibly beautiful he looked, the only light being the light coming in from the small opening of the janitors closet. “you know what i mean.” you say, your hands moving from his chest, snaking around his neck, pulling him a tad bit closer. you dont miss the way he glances at your lips once again, and youre glad to know that he isnt the only one who cant stop thinking about kissing the other again.

his hands pull you even closer and you can feel his breath on your lips, almost closing the distance. “no, i dont know what youre talking about.” and his lips are on yours once again, smiling when he feels you kiss him back with the same passion.

his kisses were so soft, so gentle, so fragile. your legs were turning weak and you were melting into his arms.

pulling away after a few seconds, he looked at you once again, wanting to ask you something, yet hesitating.

“what’s on your mind?” you ask him, raking your hands through his hair, and he melts into your touch. “i just… im wondering if we’re ever gonna be more than just.. secret meetings and stolen kisses like these. i want to do this in front of everyone. i want to be able to hold your hands, to kiss you on your forehead, to reassure you whenever you think you havent prepared enough for a test, to be able to call you mine. call me selfish but i want to tell everyone that youre mine.” he finishes off, shying under your smile towards him.

you cup his face in your hands and make him look at you. “whatever you want okay? im just worried that all your fangirls might be mad that im the one who’s dating you and not them.”

sunghoons eyebrows furrow. “what fangirls? we’re both a bunch of nerds who would compete with each other to try to cover up the feelings we actually had.” you giggle and kiss his nose, adoring the way he scrunched it up at the feeling. you pull him into a hug, smiling.

“dork”

a/n: hgfjdksla hoon brainrot ✍🏽 reblogs and feedback are much appreciated <3

©iwonzzi

love story? | hyung line.

synopsis: enhypen’s hyung line as different types of romance tropes! pairing: hyung line x gn!reader (separate) genre/warnings: (heeseung: heeseung being annoying, a bit of sunghoon slander) / (jay: he threatens to give away his cooking to jake n heeseung, premature wrinkling) / (jake: ruined picnics, jake being too cute to handle) / (sunghoon: mentions of blood + bruises, cursing, sunghoon + you being two little silly geese) word count: 2.7k (hoon’s is so long i got carried away LMAO) a/n: first post yay !!! hope everyone enjoys <3 (ps. i am a firm believer in jongseong’s love language being acts of service !! come discuss enha love languages w me ;))) )

lee heeseung ⁂ academic rivals to lovers

lee heeseung is infuriating. the slight upturn of his lips into that smirk you always see before he inevitably corrects you, the mischievous glint in his eyes as he twirls his pencil with the tips of his fingers, the subtle twitch of his nose after you brush him off that tells you he’ll be back to bother you later. all of it makes your blood boil, but today has proven one, equally frustrating thing: even if the gods do exist, they don’t seem to care about you.

Seguir leyendo

彡 compromise. - p.sh

requested for 1k au event!

SUMMARY ! being roomates with the biggest (and hottest) slacker on campus was difficult to say the least. plates left on the counter, clothes from him and the girl’s he brings over left in the living room, the list goes on. one day after you’ve had enough of his uncleanliness, sunghoon offers you to be his girlfriend in exchange for a tidy, mess-free apartment. totally not worth it.. right?

PAIRING ! roommate!sunghoon x f!reader

WC ! 2.1k

GENRE ! roomates au, fake dating, fluff (?) and lots of banter

WARNINGS ! slight suggestive, making out, sunghoon being a bit too confident for his own good

a/n: woohooo first fic for the event done! thank you for requesting anon! <3

if you go into the living room and find another one of park sunghoon’s socks on your couch, you might just explode.

you take a deep breath in, and out. the moment of truth. you slam open the door to your sunghoon-proof bedroom, taking quick paces towards the living room and—

there it is.

a sad, lonely sock without it’s matching pair laid on your couch. you knew it.

park sunghoon. one of the most sought after guys on campus, yet it was only his first year of college.

meanwhile, it was your fourth. so how you became roommates with him? one, tragic answer: you were broke and desperate for someone to split rent with.

sunghoon wasn’t a bad person. he did little things like pick up your forgotten mail, or turn on your coffee machine while you got ready in the bathroom. though, you'd still say he ranked number one on your list of the worst roommates you’ve ever had.

he was lazy, irresponsible, and oh so messy. 80% of the time, while you were busy being productive and studying, he was busy tackling people with a ball under his arm or in the middle of coaxing some girl to come home with him after partying all night (which didn’t take much effort on his part considering that face of his).

now, you weren’t a hater. sunghoon got into this university with his talent for football alone—so props to him for.. catching balls. honestly, if he wasn’t the way he was, you’d probably fall for his handsome charms yourself. but when his annoying, mosquito-like presence decided to intervene with the peaceful sanctuary that was once your neat and homely apartment, all wrath was destined to come out of you at some point.

for a while, you were nice enough to clean up after the younger boy, making pathetic excuses for him in your head in an effort to be a kind, forgiving roomate.

but after a month of dealing with his unwashed plates left on the counter, clothes scattered around the living room from not only him, but also the girls he brings over, and all in all his untidiness everyday, you’ve finally snapped.

this feeling of undeniable rage may partially be because of how stressed you are from all the new assignments and lack of coffee, but you’ve never felt more ready for confrontation by the time you’ve reached sunghoon’s bedroom door.

you offer two passive aggressive knocks, not even waiting for a reply before yanking the door open. “look sunghoon— we have to talk.”

nobody.

you take a few cautious steps inside his disarrayed bedroom, nose wrinkling at the sight of a mountain of clothes near his bed despite a closet being a few steps over. there’s random magazines and papers scattered across the floor, along with an unkempt stash of trinkets thrown on top of his drawer. you glance at his closet, half opened and containing only about two jackets actually hung up on racks.

“woah, never thought i’d find the campus nun snooping around my bedroom.” you whip your head around to find a shirtless sunghoon staring down at you, toothbrush perkily sticking out of his mouth. his muscled biceps flex as he crosses his arms, raising a curious brow at the sock pinched between your nails.

your eyes bulge at the sight of his bare, sculpted torso, turning around with a tint of red rushing to your ears. “just because i don’t spend every night getting wasted doesn’t make me a nun, nor was i snooping,” you spit defensively.

sunghoon chuckles, padding across his room to pick up a random top off his shirt mountain. “says the girl who just covered her eyes like she’s never seen a shirtless guy before.” he smirks, glancing down at your childish bear printed pajamas. “i mean— not that i think you have.”

you spin back around, huffing in relief now that he was dressed and pointing to the sock in your hand. “shut up, i’m only here to listen to your amazing explanation on why i keep finding socks and other assortments of your clothing all over the living— hey! don’t walk away when i’m talking to you!”

you frustratedly discard the sock somewhere on his bed, following your roommate back out to where he’s now rummaging through the kitchen pantry, toothbrush long forgotten on the sink’s rim. you take another deep breath, trying to stay calm. “sunghoon,” you begin.

“yeah, pretty girl?” your eye twitches in disbelief, hating the way butterflies flutter through your stomach from the nickname he’s always called you.

“i told you, don’t fucking call me that. now listen here,” you try to look stern, but sunghoon personally thinks you look adorable. “i’ve been dealing with your bullshit all month without a single complaint,” you rant, watching as he pulls out a box of cinnamon toast crunch. “do you ever wonder how all those plates and bowls you leave in the sink magically disappear? yeah, well, that was me slaving my ass away like your personal housemaid!”

sunghoon is completely unphased by your vent, too busy pouring his cereal into an empty bowl with a shrug. “nobody told you to clean those for me.”

moments like these made you question how you’ve dealt with the boy for a whole month.

“if i don’t, they begin piling up into a jenga tower,” you fire back with a scoff, “similar to the wonderful sorting technique used in your bedroom.”

unbelievably, the boy giggles at that, taking a seat at the counter with his late night snack. “y’know, you’re pretty funny when you’re not locked up in your room all day.” your jaw tightens, snatching the milk away right as your roomate reaches out for it. he looks at you as if you just committed a crime, lips turning into a defeated (but adorable) pout. “hey, i’m trying to have cereal here.”

“sunghoon,” you snarl once more, holding the carton above his head like a parent would with a child’s toy.

“what?” he whines.

“if you don’t start doing shit around here, i’m kicking you out.”

instead of a dramatic gasp or begs for mercy and forgiveness like you’d hoped for, he snickers, pouncing up like a cat and snatching the milk back outof your grip. “yeah, right. as if you could afford this apartment by yourself.”

silence (besides the sound of sunghoon chewing his cinnamon toast crunch).

out of the corner of his eye, sunghoon sees your face drop in utter defeat. you look close to the verge of tears, knuckles turning white by your sides. yes, he may be a jerk sometimes, but he wasn’t that evil. his eyes softened slightly, letting out a thoughtful sigh as he munched on his spoonful of cereal.

suddenly, a lightbulb appears atop his head, smirking brilliantly. “okay, being the handsome genius i am, i’ve come up with an offer— a compromise, you could say.”

you didn’t know your roommate that well considering it’s only been a month since you’ve met, but you were confident that any ideas his pea-sized brain came up with weren’t going to be very good ones in your favor. you offer him a raise of your brow, gesturing for him to continue.

dropping his silver spoon back into the bowl, sunghoon rests his elbows up on the counter. “in exchange for ‘doing shit around here’, you have to be my girlfriend.”

you choke on your saliva, giving him a dumbfounded expression. “what!?”

“hear me out!” he quickly defends, “my parents are planning to set me up with this weird, artsy church girl, and i just can’t allow that to happen for my reputation sake. you’re my only hope, pretty.”

“first of all, you were basically calling me a nerd a few minutes ago, so i don’t see how i’d be any better than her. and what exactly would i have to do as your fake girlfriend— if i metaphorically took you up on this deal?”

sunghoon ignores the first half of your statement with no explanation. “well, probably have dinner with my family every once in a while, hold my hand, kiss me-“

you stumble slightly. “woah, woah- what?! why would we kiss in front of your parents?” you inquire stressfully, the thought of kissing sunghoon making your heart beat much faster than it should.

though honestly, this compromise sounded like a win-win in your book. finally, no more socks found on the couch or plate mountains in your sink, and getting to fake date park sunghoon along the way? you make sure not to give in just yet, as you don’t need the boy’s ego skyrocketing any higher than it was, but you were feeling pretty great.

“to prove we’re serious, duh.” sunghoon rolls his eyes at your question, suddenly turning in the barstool to face you. “c’mon, let’s practise now.”

huh? wait, practise what?

does he mean—

you step away from the counter nervously, only to be pulled back by sunghoon’s grip on your wrist. he has a barely noticeable, smug smirk on his face at your sudden nervousness, grasping your hand tightly in his bigger one. “hey, i never said yes to the deal yet,” you gulp.

taking a leap of faith, sunghoon leans further in, his pointy nose touching yours. his breath tickles your lips, and you hate the way his closeness affects you. now you understand why no girl on campus could resist him; it was impossible.

“why not, pretty girl? are you scared of having to kiss me? is that why you don’t want to say yes?” he teases, reaching his free hand up to softly run a thumb along your plush lips. for some reason, you don’t move away from his surprisingly gentle touch.

“n-no. i’m not scared of you, sunghoon.”

his smirk deepens in pure amusement. “then kiss me,” he encourages, calmly waiting for you to make the first move.

you take one last look at him. his slightly disheveled hair, the moles scattered perfectly along his features even more delicate up close. down to his curved nose, rubbing against the tip of yours affectionately. and lastly, his enchanting pink lips, just begging to be kissed by you.

so you do. before you can stop yourself, you’re kissing park sunghoon. the boy you were just scolding for his constant messes. the boy who was known and loved by your whole college, his reputation lying at the highest amongst everyone’s standards.

but it didn’t matter, in that moment, he was just sunghoon, your lazy, ridiculously hot roommate.

sunghoon finally frees your wrist, allowing you to reach up and rest your arms around his shoulders. to no surprise, he’s definitely the best kiss you’ve ever had, full of experience and confidence. the taste of cinnamon toast crunch runs through your senses, only furthering as he runs a tongue along your bottom lip, begging for entrance.

feeling playful, you refuse, making sunghoon grunt in annoyance. he pulls away for a second to glare at you. “that’s how you wanna be, huh? let me show you who’s in charge around here, then.”

before you can ponder on what that meant, his lips are back on yours more fierce than ever, standing up from his seat to force you right against the counter.

as you try to get comfortable in the new position, he harshly pinches your side. in a moment of surprise at his attack, you gasp, lips parting and giving sunghoon the perfect opportunity to force his tongue right into your mouth and explore every crevice of you.

it’s hard to keep up with sunghoon, he was much too intense for you. so you gently push him away, catching your breath hastily. when you finally look up at him, his lips are swollen, slightly wet and chapped.

it seems he understands that you want to stop here, so he moves back, giving you some space. “i.. i came here to scold you about your socks. how did this happen?” you ask to mostly yourself.

“my charms are irresistible.” sunghoon lets out a laugh, walking backwards towards his bedroom. “so, starting tomorrow you’re my girlfriend, okay pretty girl?”

still trying to calm your racing heart, you offer a small, defeated glance to your roommate. “yeah, whatever, pretty boy.” he smiles brightly at his newly earned nickname, turning around before closing his bedroom door for the night.

with a sigh, you glance back around only to find sunghoon’s half eaten bowl of cinnamon toast crunch, soggy and abandoned on the counter.

this deal wasn’t going to change anything, was it?

if you enjoyed, reblogs n’ comments are always appreciated and motivating!

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perm taglist: @duolingofanaccount @strawberry-sunset-skies @scented-morker @koshinene @boowoowho @sultrybaby @yunjinlvrr

r u mine?

jungwon x reader

genre : slow burn, ceo x secretary, love alarm.

synopsis : once captured by a camera, cupid has shot twice, and shot hard into the core of the hearts of colleagues.

warnings : this may be the cause of u being single (jk) kissing, making out.

this is short, i think.

treacherous your heart was, saying things you never abide too, your mind hindered the truth. that you really, deeply fell.

you were being courted by heeseung, never seeing deeply what was with you, deeming yourself loyal to him in the times of courtship.

but does he know that the one that you ever truly dreamed of being with was your boss, mr. yang jungwon.

it was one long day in the yang company, buying, selling, building. it was then until you realized you left your phone by jungwon's office, switching yours with his instead.

entering the moody room there was a faint smell of coffee and paper. clicking sounds heard seeing the person to cause an action. he raised his head up, glasses reflecting the infrared screen.

"not heading home yet ms. lee?" his voice almost monotonous, queried.

"i was, i switched our phones by mistake" you said heading to his desk swiftly taking your phone and putting back his.

"i'm going to take my leave sir yang" you bowed, heading for the door, only a hand stopping your physique to reach out of the room"

"can you stay—" his statement cut short by the sudden alarm sounds coming from the both of your phones, pink stained screens and heart bubbles fusing into the monitor with bold words included saying 'match found!'

you directly looked at his face surprised, a laugh travelled past your lips as your standing figure weakened. "i wouldn't believe if someone said you had love alarm, but you actually do!" you said grinning.

although it was stupid that you also had one, in your defense it was left untouched and treated unserious, but in contrast with your boss he was consistent, and strict, nothing could've made you loosen up more than now. it eased you up that he probably had been having a hard time finding a partner.

his hand went up to scratch his neck chuckling lowly. "i wont tell anyone" you paused "i'm going now" you smiled at him until you were once again stopped.

"i don't know how long it will take until you realize my advances towards you" his face forming a confused-impatient picture that he delivered with a chuckle.

"i downloaded this stupid app, that i also paid money for to pair us and to make this stupid alarm, just for it to go off on the wrong time" he chuckled airily.

"but jungwon you know i have heese—" you said confused.

"but does he know? that i'm the one you give attention too, the one you look for, the one you truly give attention to? not just in this workplace" he scoffed, hiding his bruised pride.

"you deem yourself loyal to the courtship, yet you give me and continue to let me show you how much i adore you" he stood further pushing you to the wall.

"will he ever know how much i came close to you right at this moment?" he finally said releasing a heavy sigh. his adoration for you trembled as he saw the sincerity in your eyes as the pillars of his love for you only broke to be built stronger than the second that just passed by.

"i guess he will soon have to know on how much i prefer your lips mr. yang" you finally spoke, pulling onto his necktie pulling him into you. your lips colliding into synchronization of hearts.

his lips never felt more divine than this, than any other luxury that went as close to his lips. you, and you only is his luxury in life. your lips spent longer time just to appreciate every crevice of your being, his tongue entering your mouth as you felt his sincerity sucking yours as he moaned into your mouth, he felt immaculate.

you were soon seated on the couch as he slowly moved away from your lips, a string of saliva connecting you both, the lust filled being of jungwon pushing himself into you kissing you again, as if it was the most sensual thing to be done.

you pushed him to flip him into sitting on the couch as your legs placed on each corners of his thighs, your pants grew short from the pressure on the cloth by your knees. you rested on his thighs both of your heads moving as if there was more space to consume into each other.

"god, you're so hot" he said onto your lips. the vibrations went through your body giving you motivation to press yourself flush against him, slowly grinding into him as you suck on his tongue causing him to moan again. "y/n" he moaned into your mouth, his head went loose, his face resting onto your neck, making contact with his lips, "sh-shit i might lose myself baby" he grunted.

you guess heeseung wouldn't have to know that you clearly had a favorite.

I FINALLY POSTED AGAIN!! i missed posting and interacting with you guys. i dont think you would be surprised seeing another jungwon fic from me anm😭

au where sunghoon thinks he's cupid (cupid is so fucking dumb 😡😡😡)

🗒️ 、 INTENTIONS

popular sunghoon x fem reader 1535 words genre fluff mikaela’s note because sunghoon is so tristan dugray coded, inspired by a gilmore girls scene

“I’d kiss you but your boyfriend’s watching,” Sunghoon mumbles, and he’s so close you can feel his breath on your lips.

He holds your gaze confidently, with a tinge of arrogance as his tongue darts out to lick his lip. You think that Sunghoon is the most annoying person in the world, because how can he look so devilishly handsome and have such an intoxicating effect on you.

It all started when he showed up unannounced and uninvited to your birthday party — still in his school uniform, tie loosened and sleeves rolled up with his blazer hanging over his shoulder.

And you should have known better than to let him charm his way into your house. “What are you doing here, Hoon?”

He loves the way his nickname rolls off the tip of your tongue, it's so addictive and he wants to record it so that he can play it again and again, even if your tone is one of spite.

“Happy birthday princess,” Sunghoon completely ignores your words, taking steps closer towards you, “now, where’s my birthday kiss?”

He’s at it again, aimlessly flirting with you. You roll your eyes, a deep sigh exiting your mouth, “it’s my birthday, Hoon.” How did he even know where you lived? You were sure you told everyone you invited not to bring him along.

“So I’ll give you a birthday kiss,” he grins, eyes glinting with mischief as he watches your facial expressions fall, ears burning red as you quickly turn around.

You hate Park Sunghoon and the unimaginable hold he has on you. “I’m going to find my mother. Do not, I swear to god, cause any trouble.”

“Your mother? It’s a little early in the relationship,” he moves swiftly to your side, arms casually slinging over your shoulder as he pulls you closer into him forcefully. “But it’s okay, I’m ready.”

Where in the world does Sunghoon get his cocky attitude from, you think as you try your best to pry and lift his arm away from your shoulder. Despite your surface indifference towards his advances, there were millions of butterflies invading your stomach at his every single action.

Before you can even try to escape, a voice calls your name and you stop to talk to Yunjin. “Park Sunghoon? What are you doing here?”

Sunghoon steals a glance at you, and he thinks you look absolutely adorable as you pout at the image of multiple people seeing you with him; given how you always seemed to have complaints about his overly flirty nature and playboy ways.

But Sunghoon hasn’t fooled around since you transferred into Decelis two months ago, a personal record for him. At first all you were was a form of entertainment, someone who had cute reactions to his smooth pick up lines.

Then it all came crashing down, when he started to feel the need to bicker with you everyday and mess up your hair every time he sees you in the hallways. And somewhere in between the blurred lines, he fell in love.

“Here to celebrate my girl’s birthday,” he cocks his head towards you, who’s palms now cover your face in sheer embarrassment. God, now it’s going to spread like wildfire. His girl?

Yunjin’s eyes widen and jaw drops, “really? You guys are together? But I thought you were with Choi Soobin.” She asks, nudging you.

Sunghoon frowns at her words. Choi Soobin? Since when? Sunghoon literally follows you around school whenever he sees you, and he’s never seen you ever talk to that boy.

“Soobin and I are just friends,” you clarify, “also we are not a couple,” your finger gesturing to you and Sunghoon as you answer the girl.

“Tomorrow we’ll be a couple,” Sunghoon cuts back into the conversation, voice loud, and he catches your surprised expression as he smirks slyly.

Though he continues the conversation without a single stutter or break, Sunghoon’s feeling utterly disgusted. Is that the kind of boy you like? Nerdy losers who can’t do anything for the life of themselves? He doesn’t really like the thought of turning into those types of boys, but whatever you want, he thinks — he’s already practised abstinence for you, he might as well go all the way.

At the same time Sunghoon wonders if you’re really that oblivious to his obvious advancements towards you. He’s made it crystal clear: dumped his girlfriend, follows you around, talks about you literally all the time, and yet you’re still clueless.

And he whisks you away before you find the chance to clarify his words again. He’s determined this time round, to make it extremely straightforward for you.

“Hoon why in the world would you say stuff like that,” you groan, hands slapping his chest. And he grins like an idiot at your touch, if this was what it took for you to initiate skinship with him, he’d be more than willing to proclaim himself as your boyfriend any day.

He places a hand on the place you’d just hit, “it’s painful,” he pouts, and you almost feel a little guilty at your harsh actions, “can you kiss it better?”

Until that. You huff, “i’m leaving,” you announce as you turn away, ready to walk right back into the crowd. Sunghoon quickly clasps his fingers around your wrist, pulling you into his chest.

Your eyes become those of a deer caught in headlights as your body is pressed firmly against his, his arms finding their way to your waist; a gentle but firm hold as he bends down.

“Wasn’t done yet, princess,” he smirks, and you feel some sort of danger looming over because Sunghoon looks like a devil enticing you to commit sin. His black hair styles perfectly like always and his red tie, due to his excessive movements, is now dropping down even more to expose his honey skinned collarbones.

The most you can muster is a mumble, “what,” and your eyes are glassy as you stare up at him, he thinks he might go insane — so close to just moving in to place a kiss on your invitingly soft lips.

“I’d kiss you but your boyfriend’s watching,” and he literally spits the term out, unable to believe he’s labelling someone else other than him ‘your boyfriend’. He knows you guys aren’t together, but just for the comfort of his heart he has to hear it again.

It takes you a while before you process his words. “He’s not my boyfriend, Hoon,” and it’s that short statement coupled with the way you say his name that really breaks it for him.

Sunghoon moves in just as you finish your sentence, and he sinks into your pillowy lips. It’s paradise on earth and he thinks he will never be able to get enough of this feeling.

“Sunghoon,” you mumble when he breaks the kiss, slightly out of breath as you look up with hazy eyes.

He chuckles, “sorry, baby, my bad. I’ll return your kiss back,” and Sunghoon doesn’t hesitate to give you another kiss, fingers caressing your waist as he pulls you closer to him.

This time it’s you who breaks the kiss, way too out of breath to even form full sentences without a few breaks in between. “You just kissed me.”

“Right, I just did that baby,” he smiles, those tiny fangs of his showcased as he gazes adoringly at you. “Actually, I’m looking for a girlfriend.” He pauses, eyeing your flushed cheeks and pink lips, “you looking for a boyfriend by any chance, princess?”

Now that you’re literally glued onto Sunghoon, you take the chance to look at him. Sharp nose, pretty moles that you could probably trace along all day, and his eyes which contrasting to his calm demeanour, held anxiousness as he waited for you to answer.

You’ve thought about dating Sunghoon before. Multiple times. Way more than you should’ve. And you never wanted to ever confess to it, because he was everyone’s crush. And not only that, he was annoying — constantly teasing you and making you flustered by his actions. You’d curse every time your heartbeat started to accelerate at his flirty words. You had thought that there was no way he’d ever like you back.

“I’m looking for a boyfriend,” you admit, letting out a soft giggle at Sunghoon’s overjoyed expression. And you decide that maybe now’s the time to get back at him, tease him a little to get him to stay on his toes, “maybe I should go find Soobin.”

His shoulders drop almost immediately and his arms wrap around your waist securely, chin resting on the top of your head. “No fucking way,” he grumbles, “you’re my girlfriend now. And I’m your boyfriend.”

“Yeah, you are,” you say, voice muffled in the embrace of Sunghoon. And you hear him giggle slightly, the rumble of his chest exposing the boyish feelings your boyfriend was currently going through, “for now.”

Sunghoon lifts his chin from your head, fingers brushing over your cheeks before they land themselves on your jaw. He tilts your chin up, “too bad my intention is forever.” And he places a chaste kiss on your lips again and again.

You are in for a long ride.

© SJYUNS

꒰ 12:17 A.M. ꒱ ❛ drunk!aomine daiki x reader ༉‧₊˚✧

𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊 at your phone screen, adjusting to the light coming of it in your dark bedroom, swiping the answer phone button. when you receive a drawled, “hey dummy,” whatever tiredness you were feeling moments prior is suddenly gone.

immediately, you can tell the man on the other end not sober. you smile at your friend’s deep tone. “hey stupid,” you greet back in amusement. “you still out with the guys?”

at your question, aomine seems to grumble under his breath, making laughter bubble in your throat.

“that bad, hm?”

“nah, nah.” in between his word’s there’s a slight muffle, probably from him rubbing a hand over his face. “we had a lot and half o’ them are annoying drunk. so i escaped.”

“escaped? where to? the bar’s bathroom?”

“no,” aomine answers your teasing tone with a clipped remark. “i’m in the back by the pool tables.” there’s a pause before a thoughtful, “you suck at pool.”

you nod grimly, though he can’t see. “always an honest one. you can’t just once sugar coat an answer?”

“sugar coating is for loser, loser.”

nice to know he’s still just as insulting while under the influence. still, you smile at his words.

“alright well, the boy’s’ll be searching for you soon,” you say, recalling kise’s character and guessing he was a few minutes away from gathering an aominecchi search party. “thanks for the check in. get home safe, okay?”

“wait, don’t hang up so soon,” aomine grunts and you can just imagine the deep(er) furrow of his brows as his mouth lifts into a frown. “still wanna talk to you.”

“i am your most interesting friend albeit a dummy, aren’t I?” you ask, confident sigh leaving your lips. a yawn escapes you as you switch on the bedside lamp next to you, further squinting at the sudden contrast of light. he doesn’t answer your question, and if it weren’t for the buzzing background noise of the bar across the line, you’d think he hung up. “aomine-?”

“don’t make me say it.”

Seguir leyendo

enha edits on tiktok with reggaeton/latin music>>>

MILF HUNT! ― P.JS

Jay, a favorite among classy wives to hire during the hot summer season for a nice, thorough pool cleaning, seems to have a favorite wife of his own.  You.  Or the one where Jay was the pain-in-your-ass son of the family you used to babysit for, but now he’s making it his mission to be the pain-in-your-ass pretend husband that you never asked for, but very clearly need. 

minors dni 

PAIRING ― park jongseong x afab milf!reader  

WORDCOUNT― 18.9k

CONTENT―  age gap: reader is 29 and jay is 22, milf trope/single mother reader, college pool boy jay (turned part time babysitter), reader has 1 kid and jay really wants to give her another, reader has morals!! jay just doesn’t see it as a moral issue, he is actually very sweet 

!WARNINGS! ―  age gap, jay is somewhat of a manipulator, he’s gentle but won’t take no for an answer. dub-con in one instance. major breeding kink and kind of a mommy and daddy kink (domesticity), angst regarding reader and her ex husband, reader has huge tits 

NOTE ― this was supposed to be a toxic jay fic but it turned into this instead because i love him so bad…………. NOT PROOF READ, mind the typos. i'm insane for him.

nsfw tags under cut

nsfw tags― big dick jay, masturbation, small instance of dubious consent, tit obsessed jay, groping and grinding, mommy/daddy kink, breeding kink, unprotected sex, cum stuffing-ish, pussy eating, fingering, basically it’s jay doing stuff to you, this ain’t smut this is making love, also reader doesn’t shave her coochie and jay fucking loves it.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Having a stray eye isn’t typically something you afford yourself when it comes to men. Things tend to change with time though, that much you know is true. 

It was proven to you for the first time when your ex husband decided to up and leave you three weeks before your due date for a woman–well, girl, fresh out of high school. Years of trust and promises crushed with just a single sentence and a slam of the door. Time must’ve changed you for him to leave so heartlessly. Time must’ve changed him to become so cold. 

 It was proven again when you were able to heal despite never believing you could. Seconds of pain turned to minutes, to hours. Days. weeks. Months. Years of pain before being able to wake up and feel somewhat numb to it all. Like a flip switch in your head that told you that you can be happy now even if as a single mother. After all, the hard part was over. 

It took some four to five years, but it did happen. Time did change you, it healed you, it matured you. As your child grew, so did you. And for the better, you think. You count your blessings of living a life far more lavish than you ever could have anticipated given the circumstances that had been thrown at you. Even to the point of nesting, wanting another child, wanting a big and happy family. But alas, your ex husband had better things to do. 

At the end of the day, you’d never be able to call this home yours if you had stayed with your ex husband. He didn’t like this kind of “flashy” lifestyle, and to him, everything you wanted seemed too flashy for him. Perhaps he was right to some extent, as you recognize the brand name goods you now own, solely because you had promised yourself in the depths of your despair that you’ll get to a point in life where you can buy yourself everything you not only need, but want. So, here you are, owning an expensive home, in a nice neighborhood, with a nice car and a nice pool. 

Your daughter has everything she could want and need too, aside from a sibling, it’s certainly still more than what you had growing up and it’s all because of you. A fully decorated bedroom drenched in glitter, purples, creams, yellows, and pink, her favorite color. All sorts of play houses, costumes, dolls, a few lego sets, and even some plastic swords and knives for the days she wants to pretend to be her favorite movie characters. Clothes she can grow into, and a nice little fund building up for her as she grows up. Her first car, college, help for a down payment on her own first house. 

Both of you have everything you could ever want or need and for that, you’re so proud. Especially knowing your husband would have never believed you could make it this far without him. Still, despite having everything you could ever ask for, there’s something in you that feels empty.

Time changes things. 

Time changes a lot of things, you note more than usual, as the man you’ve been ogling for the past three weeks makes himself far more known to you than you ever wished he would.

The interaction with him was always so quick before today and given the fact that he was a complete stranger, you never quite invited him into your home considering–you know, small child and all. You had hired him over text. Jay, your neighbor said his name was. His handsome features didn’t offer you anything more than a clean pool and a wandering eye. 

Your neighbor apparently has a friend who has a cousin that has an even nicer pool than you do. Given, it’s only a nicer pool due to the fact that this young man, Jay, tended to it weekly and made damn sure it could be drunk out of if a person had a craving for chlorine. 

You feel like an idiot now that it didn’t dawn on you quick enough. Sure, he looked a bit familiar to you but who doesn’t when you’re always out and about seeing so many different faces on a daily basis? His name, Jay, didn’t ring any bells. Now though, the shame of staring at his sweaty pecs and biceps came crashing down the moment you realized who Jay actually is. 

He didn’t do a damn thing to remind you either, if anything, all he did was walk around all sweaty in the afternoon heat with his tank top either sticking to him, or off entirely. It appears that you had just been too busy running errands with your child, considering his shifts were always when you were home. Too busy cooking, cleaning, reading, lounging. Too busy looking at…well, not his face. 

Too busy to give the man a glance more than that of a slice of pie behind a bakery window. 

Jay. 

Since fucking when was that his name?

“Park Jongseong.” You whimper near mortified, three weeks too late as you hand him his pay with nervous hands. “Spray-cheese in my hair Jongseong?” 

“Ah, was wondering when you’d pick up on that.” He smiles at you with that crooked grin, a knowing look that any man at a bar would give you if he had caught you checking him out. Then, he pockets the hefty amount of cash that you hand to him. “I go by Jay more often these days.” He trails off, an amused smirk half-falling as he looks at your expression of realization. “You can call me whatever you want though.”

He’s well aware of how often you’ve checked him out since he started intentionally taking his clothes off. After all, it’s mid-july by this point and the sun baring down on him doesn’t quite call for a fucking turtle neck sweater. Or a T-shirt, or a tank top, for that matter. It calls for all skin baby, beautifully tanned and toned for you and any of your neighbors to look at if they so wanted to. 

Jay doesn’t work out for nothing, after all. Summer after summer, he’s found himself to be quite fond of the rich women that hire him for their pool services. Always wanting an attractive young man to wander around half naked and satiate their lack of sex life with their husbands, or boy-toys, or what have you. He knows all that extra pay isn’t because he does a good job either. He’s gotten winks, small comments, even a few offers of his body for more pay.

He’s turned them all down, of course. For a full-on affair, anyway. Jay has gotten a few blow jobs and quickies as a tip before though, and a lot of that is why he keeps getting referred to more women. Richer women. Never single women. 

Until you. 

He quite enjoyed catching you looking at him. Especially given the fact that he knew exactly who you were when you introduced yourself to him via text. That little childhood crush on you came back within an instant upon actually seeing you again. Truly, he had forgotten all about you up until that fateful day three weeks ago. 

If he’s being honest, he’s been pining something fierce since he first stepped foot on your property. Excitement swelled inside of him just to see you again. To see if you’re still hot, to see how you’re doing, what you’re doing. How your life is going.

 He knew you didn’t recognize his nickname through text, and he definitely knew you didn’t recognize him to be eating him up with those eyes of yours either. So, he played along, enjoying it while he could before it would inevitably dawn on you. Still, he remembers you so well from back then. Crazy to know that he rarely thought of you for the past twelve years or so, and how all those little butterflies of his came back in a far more mature way. He was only ten back then, but he’s a man now. 

Twenty two and perfectly sound as a man who knows what he likes. The fact that you happen to fall into that category is no fault of his own, honestly. It’s your fault if anyone’s at all. Jay is a man that likes a specific type of woman too. Woman. Not a girl, not a young lady, not a free spirit, nor a prude. He is drawn to the idea of experience, to the idea of settling down. It’s not easy to find that at his age, in college, surrounded by party girls and casual drug use. 

And, well, imagine his smile upon seeing your lovely, lavish home with the large pool, no ring on your finger, a whole fucking child, and your motherly instincts when you buckle her into the car for an errand. Oh and the broken fence in the far back of your yard.

You’re a single mom. 

A hot single mom who lives lavishly. One who could probably use a man’s help around your house.

He half expected you to be able to recognize him when he appeared for work the first time. He even had a monologue in his head on what to say to you, and how to present himself. You didn’t seem to take notice though, introducing yourself to him as if you hadn’t spent all that time in his childhood home when you were a teenager. Like you never mothered him, or put him to sleep with the soft lul of your voice when you let him watch all those scary movies before bed. 

 Clearly you’re too busy experiencing life to notice the way he fawns over you too. Hating how you’re more reserved than the other lavish, fixed-up women. You seem to have standards, or maybe it’s just priorities ... that's so hot. Truly, it only makes him want you more because by now, the other women would already be rubbing all over him. The ones who shouldn’t be wanting him the way they do. So, yes, he’s always stealing glances at you with sparkling dark eyes, fantasizing in his head that this pool is his to clean now, because that’s what a good man would do for you, right? With him around servicing your pool and lawn, you’d never need to hire or spend money on another broke ass college student again.

Yes. That’s how quickly he fell into this infatuation solely because you looked at him like you want it without realizing who he was. Hell, without realizing how perfect you are in terms of what he wants.

God, how are you still single? 

Like, why do you have a child and a house so beautiful without a man wandering around doing all of this work for you? Not that you couldn’t do it on your own, it’s just, you clearly have the means to make a man do as you please. Why haven’t you?

You happen to fall almost perfectly into the categories of what he’s looking for. Save for the fact that now you recognize him as that kid you used to babysit rather than the man who tries to be sexy while cleaning your pool. Which is a fucking shame, if he’s being honest, to be written off as that same ten year old child rather than a fucking man who very clearly has needs and desires. 

The point is– Jay wants you and he parades around your pool for you to look at him. So what if you used to babysit him? It’s not like you’re an old swamp-hag trying to lure him with candy. You’re just…a woman. And he’s just a man. 

“Well, thank you for cleaning again,” You trail off in an awkward tone, shifting your eyes to anywhere but him. He watches you though, smiling a smile you know all too well from his childhood antics. It must mean something different now, or maybe not. “I guess I’ll see you next week?” 

“Well, actually,” Jay offers, “Would you be opposed to–” You cut him off instantly with an awkward wave of your hand.

You don’t know why you make assumptions, maybe from that damned smile on his face, but you do recall your ex husband reminding you time and time again that it’s one of the things he hated about you. 

Assumptions. Always thinking the worst, or perhaps the most filthy of situations and expressions. To be fair, you feel guilty about how you’ve been looking at him, you can’t help but panic trying to pretend like it never happened, and that he never saw it happen.

“I’m not interested, Jongseong.” You respond hastily, pressing your thumb to your bottom lip to bite the skin on it, keeping your eyes away from him with the awkward words. After all, he knew who you were this whole time and paraded around like that? 

Even before recognizing him yourself, you know men well enough to know when they’re trying to flaunt. Is it so wrong to assume?

“Interested in what?” Jay tilts his head knowingly, seeing the way you buckle under the guilt of staring at the very man you used to tuck into bed every night. He can see the way you try to push those sexual thoughts you had away in the quick rejection to a simple assumption. 

 “I was just going to ask if you want me to fix your fence.” 

Ah, you did get ahead of yourself through the guilt, and you’re far too aware of it as you draw your eyes back to him and note the expression on his face. Amused, maybe a bit of concern in his eyes, even? 

“Ah, um–” You start, trailing your eyes down your fence line never once noticing a break in it. Jay is quick to point though, leaning to you with a whisper of “right there.” And well, you did not need to hear that tone in his voice the way you just did.

God, it’s so awkward.

“Well, how much would that cost me?” You question with an empty voice, staring at the broken fence. 

“Free.” He uses the same tone, leaning away from you now and smiling wide. “That is, if you provide lunch.” 

Well, despite the awkwardness, that break over there would cost you a pretty penny to fix, and your daughter needs the safety of playing in her own yard without random animals or worse, people, making their way in. Plus, you’re quite fond of saving money. How else would you be here if you weren’t good at it? And now, given that you’re most definitely not interested in Jay, what's the harm in making a few sandwiches for someone you already know well enough? It’s not like you’ve never made him lunch before.

The awkwardness will pass and your guilt will subside. You both will laugh at it over a cold glass of iced lemonade, surely. It’s not like you realized who he was anyway, it’s not like you’re just gonna keep looking at him like that. You should just push forward and it’ll all be fine. 

“Hell, I’d even watch the kiddo so you can have a break every now and then.” He watches your reaction, wanting to ask so many questions about why you’re single, who the father is, where he is, why he isn’t here. “After all, I learned quite a bit from you.” 

For a second you consider that too.

And there’s three reasons as to why you should. The first being that you were literally just looking for a new child care facility due to learning of the staff coming to work while sick. Your poor daughter came home with a fever just last week, and you’ve had little luck in finding a place with the same educational benefits for her. 

The second being that, well, while you’re not hurting for cash or anything, it wouldn’t hurt to be able to put a little more back for her college fund. Or for fun little vacations. 

And lastly, despite your guilt of lusting over someone you shouldn’t have, you know Jongseong and you know his family even better. No background check would be needed, your daughter could be in the comfort of her own home rather than a classroom setting that she’s sure to see for at least twenty years of her life in the future. 

So, yes. You consider it instantly, and Jay sees it. 

You only know of the childhood version of him and, well, the slutty pool-side version of him apparently. If only you knew of that other side of him and how fond he is of watching his own younger cousins. How good he is with children, and how much he clings to the idea of being a father one day.

Jay is great with kids, with or without them having a hot mom.

And well, he knows that he’s fond of looking at you at least. Besides, as long as you can work with his class schedules, he’d be willing to do just about anything to play pretend-husband, even if you’re unaware of it. 

“Is that so?” You finally ask, curious eyes looking at him with a furrowed brow. “Shouldn’t you be out living the life? College parties and such?” You add, wondering why such a great deal has managed to flop down on your lap. The idea of even cheaper childcare without the risk of unvaccinated children, and sick caretakers being far too good of a deal to pass up. 

“Well, yeah I guess.” He shrugs, leaning backwards to stretch and roll his shoulders. “Not really my scene though. I have classes Monday and Wednesday all day, Tuesday and Thursdays my classes are online. If you can work around that, I’d rather just be making money and chilling.” 

You think about it just for a second more when he continues. 

“I can be here on weekends too. Maybe you should be the one out relaxing and having some drinks.” 

“Well, I don’t quite need that, or for you to be here on weekends.” You think as you say it, knowing you have given up on going out to try and meet men two years ago. “I could pay you though, let’s say, thirty an hour?” 

Well, shit, that’s not too bad at all, especially considering he’s about to give up on cleaning the pools of a few women in his contacts for this. It’s a major pay cut, but still enough to get by comfortably if you’ll have him multiple times a week. That plus the pool cleaning money? And free lunch? 

“Oh, you don’t go out at all? I don’t see why not, could probably get a man in no time–” Jay ignores the wage offer and pushes to note the singlehood he had been noticing for the past three weeks. “and the pay is fine.” 

“Ah, well, the dating pool isn’t so great in this neck of the woods.” You scratch the back of your neck when you say it. “That aside, I'll have her in day care on the days you can’t be here, but it really would be a big help. Thank you for the offer, Jongseong. And for the fence too.” 

He watches you with a firm nod, shoving his hands into the pockets of his basketball shorts, still entirely shirtless in front of you. 

“And the pool.” You add quietly after a moment. 

“I think you’d be surprised about the dating pool.” He smiles as he pushes the subject back to what you had previously said, hoping you believe those words before continuing. “So, when do you want me to start?” 

“Is tomorrow too soon? You’re okay to set up here with your online classes?”

“Tomorrow is perfect.” He smiles.

“I’m sure she would be so happy knowing she won’t be going to daycare–” You clap, feeling a bit less awkward despite the boldness of the man in front of you. You’re sure he’s just teasing you for knowing you checked him out. “I know I am.” 

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

It’s a little too perfect, actually.

After that first day of watching your child and making a lazy attempt at “fixing your fence,” he’s settled in like it’s home. He wishes it was, with the lavish lifestyle in a house far too pretty compared to his own living space with piles upon piles of laundry he’s too lazy to pick up for himself. 

It’s different for you though. Different when he’s here.

Truly, he feels like he’s living the life after a couple of weeks with decent pay and a comfy space to do his homework. He watches your child, which is arguably the hardest part of the job but she’s well behaved for him. In fact, she seems to have taken a shine to him.

He’s starting to be very intentional with taking far too long to work on your fence too, and still maintaining your pool. He’s trying to drag this out for as long as he can. Even if just to see if you still look at him when you come home the same way you did before recognizing him. You never do though. When his shirt is off and he’s wiping his forehead in the sun, you don’t look at him anymore.

Hell, he’s even considered breaking things in your home just to give himself more jobs to do. More things that make him feel needed, like a husband. More things that you thank him for fixing, even if it breaks again two days later.

And ah, the food in your fridge is always free reign to him, that large television in the living room too. God, sometimes he dreads going home, and by sometimes, he means all the time. Who in their right mind would ever fucking want to live outside of this lifestyle? He really can’t believe you’re single, nor can he believe that he has the opportunity to be in your home, close to you. It shouldn’t take too long now to convince you, right? That you don’t necessarily have to be single? That you need him around to live even more comfortably?

In short, Jay is in his head about how he’s practically just roleplaying as your stay-at-home husband before having to go back to his shitty little apartment and remind himself that he’s just a fucking college student with no interest in the people on campus. And like, even with the way you come home from work, all groggy and exhausted on the days he’s there, you always thank him before giving him his pay. What he likes best about those nights is when you’re too exhausted to even pay him and you promise to do it next time.

In his mind, that’s you promising to see him again. 

He could give less of a shit about the pay at this point, as long as he gets to be in this house, smelling your favorite candles and dish detergents, seeing you, being a semi-father to a child who deserves more love than the two of you combined can give…he’ll fucking do anything you want for free. 

It’s difficult sometimes, like he really can’t help it. Some days wandering around this house and imagining how the two of you could have landed on buying it together. How the rooms would be organized if he were here from the start. Claiming his spot on your couch like any dad would. Playing dolls with your daughter, laughing with her, letting her paint his nails and put his hair in little pigtails. He even cleans your pool as if it were his own, meaning, he genuinely cleans it. 

He has taken it upon himself to mow your lawn, confusing the yard workers that you apparently hired years ago. Did he accidentally fire them? Maybe, but any good husband would save you money, right? He checks your mail, waves to your neighbors and lets them make assumptions. 

And every single fucking night it’s harder and harder to go back home.

Especially after a full day of playing dad then seeing you come back home so tired. Turning off that switch in his head isn’t easy. He wants to greet you like the husband you don’t have. He wants to ease your hard days in so many ways. Tell you he’s proud of you, that you still look so pretty after an exhausting shift of whatever the fuck you do. He wants to serve you dinner, run you a bath, fix your hair, lay you down– oh, he’s fantasizing again. Unfortunately, he has to settle with seeing the relief on your face when he lets you know in a soft voice that he’s cooked dinner and he will heat it up for you before leaving, kiddo is in her room sleeping, no dishes in the sink, and laundry is folded and put away. 

He loves the appreciation in your eyes, and sometimes even sees a glint of sadness. He can tell you wish you had this from a person who isn’t here for pay. Someone who loves you, and loves your child, and feels joy in making your life easier. 

Fuck, if only you knew. 

And  you’d be lying if you tried to say Jay isn’t a godsend to you on the days he babysits. Many times you find yourself wishing he’d just move in and do everything that you can’t do. You’d pay him well, give him a guest room, whatever. But it’s just…not viable to support a full time employee like that, nor is it fair to your daughter. 

She needs a parent, not a paid college student who needs some extra cash. You have to be that parent, you have to make time for her and witness all of her joys in life. You have to protect her and never bring in faces of men who claim to want to be a father, only to run and break her heart more than your own. 

For now, you settle with this godsend of a little shit you used to babysit. Still you can barely believe that’s the same person, but again…time changes things. And thankfully, the awkwardness of what you did has died down drastically.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Today, you’re more thankful for Jay than you have been previously. After a heavy workload has been lifted off your back with the approval of this project, you need a night out. For the first time in years, you’re giving yourself a night out, all because you have someone you can trust to be here for your daughter.

He was so understanding when you called, even happy to come over right then and there to put her to bed and mostly just house-sit for the night. Even without an end time for him, and even without asking for extra pay, he just…accepted with an understanding tone and that stupid breathy chuckle he gives to you when you ask for favors. “What? You need me there right now? I’m putting on my shoes.” He had said.

It’s the fact that now, as he sits on your couch looking at you in your chosen outfit– he seems a little off. Maybe it’s because you asked him where the best spots in town are because it’s been so long since you’ve gone out, or maybe he just feels awkward seeing so much skin on your body. 

To be fair, he didn’t realize you were going out out. He thought that maybe you were gonna go stay with a friend to celebrate and have a drink or two. 

In reality though, he’s just awestruck. Already you look great even after your busy days at work but…this is a different level. The way your tits look in that push-up bra and tiny ass top, when he’s used to seeing you head out in some sort of business casual outfit without an ounce of skin showing save for your ankles or wrists…jesus. He’s struggling more than usual to keep himself calm around you, hopping up on one leg when you walk away to try and adjust the chub in his pants, and releasing a small sigh before you’re looking at him again.

His skin feels like it’s on fire knowing you’re going out looking like that.

“You sure you're okay to sleep over? I figure it’ll be easier since I’m not sure when I’ll come home, or if I come home.” You smile with a wink, your stomach in knots over the two shots you’ve taken for the first time in years. “I can call my friends and tell them not to come if you’d rather focus on your studies.” 

Jay shakes his head, waving his hands in defense for you as if he didn’t just see the way your tits bounce and squish against your shirt with each move you make. 

“No, no! Go on, have fun.” He says, encouraging you to go out despite hoping you come home with no luck of finding a man out there. 

Just, look at you. Fuck, he’s staring again. He hates knowing that he could be one of the guys at whatever bar or club you’re landing on tonight. He could be the person that makes sure you don’t come home, getting to plant his face right there. He could be whatever you want him to be if you’re looking like that. 

But no, he has to play husband again, which is normally something he’s all too excited to do. Tonight though, he feels like a fucking cuckold. After everything he does for you, after not mentioning how you’ve skipped a few of his payments, after slaving away for hours over your pool, your household chores, fixing and breaking that fucking dishwasher, cooking you dinner every single night he’s here just to make sure you have a meal when you get off of work…you imply you may not come home tonight?

And you’re dressed like that?

And you’re…

God, you just look so good right now. It pains him to know you didn’t dress like this for him, the only man who cares enough to make your life easy. He’s not mad at you, per se, but he’s pissed that you don’t see him as an option despite showing you time and time again that not only is he an option, but the right choice. 

This is what you look like when you want to impress a man? This is how you act? How you talk? Fuck, god, fuck– maybe he’s just too deep in his one-sided roleplay but it really, really fucking feels like he’s watching his woman go off and look for someone else to fuck.

“Thank you, Jongseong,” You smile, walking over to him with a saunter in your step and a gentle smile across your lips. 

He’s never heard you speak his name so sensually, the way his cock twitches forces him to wince away from you. He’s never even seen you saunter before. Fucking hell, somehow it feels worse seeing you act like this after how many times he’s imagined it, all alone in his room. 

A slow walk from you, with the strap of your shirt slipping off your shoulder, fat tits threatening to spill out, lifting the hem of your skirt, or dress, or whatever you’re wearing in his fantasy at that point. Your voice, so soft, so sexy. And you’re practically bringing his fantasy to life right now, except he knows you’re going to fucking walk away from him like this. Into the fucking arms of some random dude at a club. 

Probably some loser he’s seen on campus too.

“It means a lot.” You add, popping a quick, platonic kiss to the top of his forehead. 

Ah, lipgloss. That little kiss on him is enough to ignite him to the point of no return. He almost wants to skip the part of asking you not to go and straight up just beg that you pick him, that you choose him. It’s not just your home, or the luxuries that come with it. It’s you that he wants. You’re the fucking luxury and you’re just gonna go to some sticky-floored club and pretend he’s not clearly checking you the fuck out right now? Like he’s not about three seconds from dropping to his knees just to see you from the angle you deserve?! 

“It’s no problem.” Jay relents, dropping himself onto your couch instead and adjusting his body to sink deep into the cushions just to keep himself from arguing against everything he’s giving you permission to do right now. 

Hah. Permission.

“Be safe.” He adds in an even more monotone voice. “I’ll be here when you get back.” 

And god, he seethes in his thoughts after you close that door and hop into the car with your friends. You don’t look like a mother tonight, and he wonders if you’ll be upfront and forward with anyone you intend to hit on too. Probably not. He’s well aware of the men in this city, after all, he’s one of them.

It’s really not something he can control after seeing you like that either. Your child is already in bed and he’s just sitting here on your couch with a throbbing, fucking weeping cock thinking about you. What’s stopping him from taking care of it? You’re not here, after all. 

You’re not fucking here. But everything about you is. 

And that’s how he finds himself in your bedroom for the first time, barely making it a foot into the room before closing the door and dropping to the floor. The scent in your room is different. It’s feminine, gentle, like the energy is kissing him all over and sending goosebumps straight to the head of his cock. He couldn’t even pull it out, already holding his breath with his hand down his pants, vigorously trying to get what he wants so badly yet knowing that his hand will never compare to you. 

And it’s here where he feels like a husband. Spilling against his pants with a silent, choked back sob as he stares forward at your bed, and the way you didn’t make it this morning. It’s messy, and he wants to be in that mess of sheets with you more than anything. 

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Jay hates that he’s now forced to get used to your late night ventures. Every weekend now. Every. Fucking. Weekend.  You ask if he’s willing to stay over so you can go unwind, and despite his better (or worse) judgment, he accepts. The only solace he finds in these ventures is knowing you consistently come back home right after usual closing times, and you’re mostly sober. Sometimes a bit whiny that you’re not lucking out, worrying that maybe you’re too old now, or maybe you’re just not as desirable. There have even been a few times where you’ve exposed your ex husband during your rants, giving Jay little hints to follow as to why you’re single, and how he left you. 

Still, he knows in your tipsy state that you usually wouldn’t talk about these things with him, but he’s all too happy to get the details once you come home. Mostly because it calms his rising rage at how you’re doing this to not only him, but yourself. It’s mostly because you’re technically coming home to him though. 

And every single time, you go back to your bedroom to grab his payment even though it could wait until morning, considering he’s been sleeping in the guest room– all he can think about is how he’s been in your room. He’s gotten off countless times by now by the smell of your room alone, still barely able to even reach your bed to lay in it himself for a better experience. God, he’s probably memorized each little fray in your carpeted bedroom floor by now with how much he’s zoned out on it mid-jerk off session right there on his knees at your door. 

He’s truly pathetic for you. 

This time though…three in the morning has passed and normally you’d have been stumbling through the door an hour ago. Normally, he’d be fighting back the need to tell you that you’re beautiful, not too old, and entirely desirable. Normally, he would be fisting his cock again in your guest room before sleep, getting off on the idea that he can cum in a house that you live in, smothered by the sheets you meticulously picked out to match the walls of the room. Moaning for you, practically crying for you to let him do it all. 

Have you really done it this time? Gone off with some man? Are you getting railed right now in some hotel, or car, or someone’s shitty man-cave? God, his mind is racing, both aroused at the fact that you must be horny to be constantly wanting to go out like this, but equally as devastated because like…he’s right here.

Who the fuck cares if you babysat him? He’s a man. No longer that child who sprayed cheese in your hair or dumped salt into the bag of sugar. He’s a fucking man, cooking you dinner when you work, parenting your child, cleaning your house, maintaining your pool and fence….He does everything for you, why the fuck don’t you see it?!

Click.

Jay’s ears perk up instantly at the sound. He sits up on the couch from his depressed slump of scrolling through his phone, quickly fixing his hair and clearing his throat. 

In you stumble, right into the little entryway table with a whisper-screams “Shit, fuck–”

Jay looks at your state before standing to his feet and rushing to you, helping you balance on your feet despite your footing not quite being grounded even with his help. You lean on him closely, letting out an alcohol scented sigh. 

His nostrils flare as he holds his breath, feeling your tit press against his arm, smelling the drinks, the sweat, and the dulled perfume on you. Then, a hint of something else. Musk. 

You’ve been with a man. 

He holds back a gesture at the way you lean on him. Nothing more he could want at this moment but to hold you tightly and tell you that he’s got you, despite the panic in his stomach at the way he sniffs out another man. Out of lust, love, desperation, frustration. This is the closest you’ve been to him for this long. You feel clammy and cold, a clear indication that you drank far, far too much. Your tank top is sticking to you, your eyes are a bit glassy–

“You’re late.” He says shortly.

“Late?!” You raise your voice before looking at him with drowsy eyes, furrowing your brow. “I don’t have a curfe-”

“Shh–” He shushes you, helping you get to the living room. “She’s sleeping and you’re going to have her make a fuss about waking up.”

You giggle to yourself as he drops you onto the couch, now aware that yes, you are not a single college student anymore. You’re a single woman. A fucking mother. 

You should’ve just gotten a hotel for the night and slept there to dream a little longer. 

“Right.” You laugh, slouching, spreading out wide against the couch and trying to fix your gaze on him. “Why’re you still awake?” 

Jay fixes his eyes on you, swallowing around a lump in his throat. The way you’re slouching…seemingly forgetting that you’re wearing a skirt and basically flashing your panties at him. God, the things could do to you right now. The things he could get away with if he wanted to. He tries to shake those thoughts for now, and instead, inspects you from head to toe.

He’s never seen you look so relaxed. Chest raising and falling with each breath, hair a little messy, lipstick stains smeared on the outsides of your lip line. He chooses to ignore the faint swell against your neck indicating someone has been sucking on you. But, well, he can’t ignore it. Both his cock and heart aches at the very thought.

“You’ve been kissing?” Jay tries to ask nonchalantly. 

“A lot more than that–” You smile, feeling a flush cross your cheeks before the disappointment hits you square in the gut. 

Jay watches your face fall, and he mimics it by falling onto the couch and sitting by your head…you know, allowing you to lay your head on him if you want to. You’d probably not notice his arousal anyway, given your state. 

“Oh?” He asks gently, the disappointment now showing plainly on not just your face, but his own.

“Thought I was gonna go home with him, turns out he decided to be done after a blowjob in the parking lot.”

Oh, the way his blood boils. Not for the fact that you were used or rejected, but for the fact that you found someone that you were interested in and genuinely intended to leave your home life in his hands for however fucking long. Really? Just gonna leave him here all alone? Like he couldn’t do better for you?

“It’s for the better–” Jay says as he shivers with irritation, struggling to keep his façade up. It’s definitely not what you wanted to hear, and definitely not what you’d have expected to hear from a college guy at all either.

“This happened last time too, except he didn’t even get me to the parking lot.” You huff, unaware of how much you’re sharing right now. 

He bites back the anger yet again, inhaling deeply before releasing a calming breath through his nose just to contain it. So…it has happened more than once? 

“Why don’t you let me take you out someday?” He says suddenly, well aware that you’ll probably never remember he said it in the first place. 

If anything, he’s testing the waters for his own sake. He’d hate himself forever if he didn’t at least take advantage of this moment a little bit. 

“Then who will watch my daughter?” You respond in slurred speech, not even comprehending who it is that’s asking you this question right now. Not even thinking about your history with him, or the family ties. 

He, on the other hand, is quite entertained by the way you don’t bring the history up like he expected. His cock twitches at it, bumping your head just a bit, not enough for you to notice apparently. Fuck, it would be so easy for him to pull it out right now, and just…tap your lips with it. 

Maybe you’d even open your mouth for him. 

“I’ll skip class on a Wednesday, we can go while she’s still in daycare.” He continues through an almost-moan, encouraging the conversation to stay positive.

“Jongseong–” You slur before clearing your throat and sitting back up in a dizzy show of how drunk you are. “You know I can’t do that. It’s too weird.” 

In all fairness, you know he has like…a thing for you. After all, why else would a college dude be spending his weekends here babysitting your kid? It’s not like you haven’t noticed the way he checks you out before you go out for the night. Why would he do all of this if he didn’t have some sort of attraction to you? Sure, you’re taking advantage of it as best as you can despite how you didn’t recognize him at first. 

Despite how deep down, you very well know how attracted to him you are too. 

“Only because you make it weird.” Jay rolls his eyes as he looks at you, spreading his legs out to adjust his comfort, noting the way you glance down to his lap and see it. “I’m a grown man–” He starts, spreading his legs wider, pressing his cock against his pants to the point you can practically see the outline. ”you know this.” He continues, trying to be bold now by reaching forward and moving a strand of your hair from your cheek. 

“You’ve seen it.”

You freeze, suddenly feeling entirely too sober to be talking about this kind of thing with him. With Jongseong. God, his mother would fucking kill you if she found out he’s in your house while you’re out trying to get fucked by whoever is willing to love you temporarily. 

Jay sees you thinking though, and continues to take the advantage now that he’s feeling brave. Now that you’ve seen the twitch in his pants and haven’t moved off the couch, or told him to go home. 

“I saw you watching me when I was cleaning your pool, multiple times.” He whispers snidely. “You stopped when you realized who I am. Why?”

“Jongseo–…” You trail off. “You know this isn’t okay. What would people think of me? There are rules, and I will not go down this route with you.”

A rush of air hits your face and suddenly, warmth hits your cheek. You feel him so close, closer than ever before. It’s dizzying. Jay is over you, hovering with one hand ghosting over your hip. 

“You want to though, don’t you?” He gets even closer now, darting his eyes down at your chest and unable to pull them away. “Knowing how good I am with your daughter? How well I clean up? How strong I can be–”

You swallow hard. For a moment, you almost lean into him. You almost melt right then and there, the need for intimacy so heavy inside of you after being left high and dry, knowing that you’d accept it from just about anyone at this point. But– this is Jongseong. You can’t. 

You really, really, can’t. 

The look of disappointment in his eyes kind of hurts when you’re pushing him away. That playful smirk falling faster than you think your sanity did the day your ex husband left you. 

“This–” You pause, realizing all too well how he’s used your drunken state against you for this conversation. “This is your last paycheck.”

“I don’t think so.” The smirk is back now, except…it’s different. “You know I promised her a Barbie dream house next weekend.” He smiles fully now. “She’s a bit attached, you know, even called me dad by accident the other day.” 

You’re shocked. 

“She…what?”

“You know she’s attached to me already, don’t be selfish.” Jay shrugs at you while rolling his eyes, leaning against the couch again and turning his head to look at you. You try to pretend that you don’t see his hand slightly groping himself. “Guess she misses having a father around. Can’t be too easy for her, especially with her mom going out every weekend trying to fuck guys who would run the second they learn about her.” He ticks his tongue now, as if he’s pitying you more than your daughter. 

“Jongseong, that’s not–”

“That’s not, what?”

“That’s not what I’m doing…” You lower your voice to a near whisper, upset that you couldn’t even enjoy the drunken state you came home in, now feeling entirely too sober, and a little sick in the stomach. 

“Oh, so you haven’t gotten laid since I’ve been here–” He leans closer again now, trying to resume what he was going to do just moments ago. “They haven’t even touched you, have they?” His hands move to your thigh and presses down as if to hold you in place. “Why?”

“I try not to just sleep with anyone.” You lie, knowing you’d sleep with anyone just to feel wanted for once. And you’re trying to ignore his hands on you right now, trying desperately not to like it. It’s the first time a man has touched you in this house since your husband left you. As expected, you almost feel your knees buckle despite sitting comfortably. “I have to be careful, you know?”

“Mm, I know more than you think.” He leans into you, hovering yet again with his upper half over you as he whispers it. “Don’t need to be careful around me though.” He adds, this time trailing his voice right against your jaw, up to your ear. “You must be so frustrated.” He ghosts his lips there for a moment, waiting for you to push him away, or say something, anything, really. 

“Why would I be frustrated?” You lend the smallest of whispers, feeling the goosebumps against your skin rising at the mere thought of giving in just this once.

“Not having anyone to please you.” He adds now, landing a very slight kiss right under your lobe. “Always being used for someone else’s pleasure, maybe?”

You almost nod, feeling weak in your state and thoughts swimming with what if’s, morals, and anxieties. You’re frozen in place despite knowing a simple push would create the distance you need to breathe. 

“Your fingers will never be enough, will they?” He continues, essentially chaining you to this couch with his words alone. You can’t help the fight in your head, you need to feel wanted, and you want so badly to feel needed. “I bet you wish someone would love you for all that you are, not all that you have.” 

It’s silent as you feel his lips press down again, this time moving his body over you almost entirely. You can feel the couch dip a bit as he places all of his weight on a knee, moving his other leg to stand between yours.

“You must need someone to fill that hole in you by now, right? That pussy of yours?” He continues, his tone a bit more snide now as you give in to his hold with shaky breaths. 

And truthfully, Jay has never let himself come on this strong towards someone before. Usually the wives are doing this to him. They’re trying to convince him, encourage him. He’s so fucking horny right now though, with that daze in your eye, your legs spread around his knee, blinking up at him like a cheating wife. As if you want to apologize, as if you need him to forgive you. Need him to make everything better.

“I heard you the other day, you know, talking to your mom–” He smiles, tilting his head to look into your eyes, seeing a small shine in them. “You want another, don’t you?” He continues, moving his lips now just over yours as he, now, presses you firmly against the couch. “You must hate knowing that I’m the only person who can do that for you.” 

“God, Jay.” You immediately buckle, not realizing how suddenly he’s not Jongseong at this moment. He’s someone else. He’s Jay.

“Why don’t you go for girls on campus?! Don’t you have parties to be attending on the weekends instead of being here, trying to parent my chil–”

“Lower that voice of yours,” He whispers, eyes now hooded as he looks at you. “You know she’s asleep.”

God, he’s right. 

“Besides, why would I want them when I have you right here under me–” He tilts his head. “Looking so disappointed that you like it, too.” 

Right then, your moral code shines into the front of your mind at the consideration of giving in.

A weight on one shoulder chanting, “No! What would people say?! What would people think?!”, and then little to no weight on the other shoulder, echoing in a sweet song of “Finally! Someone who will love you! Finally! Someone! Finally!!! Finally!” 

You pause, not knowing at all what to do. Your body wants to push him away, even your mind and soul wants you to push him away. But you know deep down, you’d only push him away to see if he will try again. No man has ever tried for you like this, and you need more of it. 

To feel desired after so long of neglecting this side of yourself, it’s enough to make a person lose their footing in reality. To give in to just about anyone willing to look at you the way he is right now. It’s the fact that you go out to try and find it, and even with this alone, Jay has satisfied you more than any stranger promising to make you cum.

“I…don’t know what to say–” You stutter. “I don’t know what to do.”

“I do.” Jay smiles, glancing at your lips before meeting your eye again. “Why not hand over the reins and relax for a–” His hand dips under your skirt, cupping your sensitive cunt in one hand alone. “Ah, I knew it.” Then, his other hand finds purchase on your chest, lifting your heavy breast in his hand with a blatant, hard squeeze.

After a sharp inhale you look away from him in shame, afraid to admit it despite the truth of it leaking through your panties and onto his palm.

“Wet.” He smiles, no longer looking at you but flicking his eyes back and forth from between your legs, and to your chest. Still, he fumbles around the wet spot, wanting so badly to lift these fingers to his mouth and taste. He’s fantasized about it, about how you’d taste, how warm it would be, what your pussy would feel like against his fingers–

And just as he’s pushing your panties to the side, pads of his fingers touching right where you need them with his eyes hooded and watching you closely, something snaps.

You push his hand away, only to feel him push back, holding you down with more force, gripping your tit tighter, sliding his fingers in before massaging the slit with a blatant moan on his lips. Then, you try again, shoving him back only to hear him chuckle and continue his antics until– you jump to your feet. It felt too good, too grounding to have him touching you like this. You nearly stumble back over the coffee table, but you manage to stand tall and firm despite the fact that even though your mind feels sober, your body is fucking wasted.

“Jongseong.” You argue immediately, using his name the same way you did when he was a child. “Stop.” 

He throws his hands up in defense, raising his brows in surprise. 

“I–” He pauses, staring at you. “I thought you were enjoying it, my mistake.” 

It’s the fact that you were. You were enjoying it too much, and there would have been no defending your actions if you had given in to the feeling. 

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Stupid. Stupid, stupid, fucking stupid. That’s what you are. 

Your ex husband was right all along. Out of everything you’ve accomplished since your heart was shattered, ripped to shreds, stomped on, you’d think it would take a lot more to break you. 

“You ask for too much.” Your ex husband had said once. “You can’t even stand to be alone for one day.” He had said a year or so later. Small digs on who you are and what you need sprinkled into small arguments, only to come more and more from the lips that you kissed and promised to kiss until you die. Until all of his words were to make you feel inadequate. Until everything he said to you stuck with you, forcing your confidence to bury itself six feet under. 

Are you to blame? As it stands, maybe. Why else would you be allowing yourself to consider it? Consider Jongseong, you mean. Never in your life would you have considered him of all people to be the one that you need. 

Never in your life would you have thought he’d be interested in a woman like you, in a situation like yours, with a child. Why did that night with him stick in your head more than every single mean thing your ex husband said to you? Why did his words seem more believable? 

Because you were drunk at the time? Wet, neglected, and drunk? 

Then why is it that you’re sitting here on your day off with your beautiful, bright-eyed daughter rummaging through your purse for whatever catches her eye….and you’re thinking about him? About what he's doing right now, how he’s feeling, if he’s eaten. 

Why is it that you’ve gone the entire week ignoring his texts, asking if you need him to come resume his job as babysitter? Why the fuck do you want to accept after how he took advantage of your state of mind? After he came onto you and tried to manipulate you? 

Despite all of his words ringing true in the back of your head. That was a dirty tactic he pulled on you. Yet, still…you want him back, and god fucking dammit you could cry knowing your daughter called him “dad.” You hadn’t believed him at first, but after this week alone it slipped from her mouth several times. 

“He’s not your dad, baby, that’s just Jay.” You remember correcting her more than once, and all she responded to you with was a confused expression. 

“Why not?” Is what her little voice gave back to you after her child-like brain decided it was fed up with you correcting her very right assumption of the guy who promised her the Barbie Dream House. 

Why not?

Why not?

Well, if you could have an adult conversation with a five year old it would be much easier to answer that. Because he sprayed cheese in your hair. Because you were seventeen and his babysitter when he was ten years old. Because you ogled him without recognizing him as your pool boy. Because of a lot of things.

“Uncle Jay.” You finally corrected her again. 

She shook her head, and continued doing and saying as her little mind pleased. It made you miss having a father around for her though. You think she needs it more than you do. 

And that fucking Barbie Dream house is what brings Jay back. 

Right at your doorstep today, with a gentle knock to the door and a timid smile on his face. He doesn’t even look at you when you open the door, and instead crouches down in front of you with the big, flashy box. He ignores you, tilting himself to look past you and straight at your daughter. 

You hold your breath when she runs to Jay, arms spread open and laughter shrieking in your ears. Your heart aches so much at this moment. 

Given your work schedule, you’d never gotten to see them interact much. He always came over as she was eating her breakfast, and you always came home after she was put to bed. You guess it’s fair that they have a bond now. She doesn’t even run at you like she does for Jay. In fact, the only time she ever did was when she had a bad day at daycare and had a tummy ache. 

She runs to you when she needs you, but she runs to Jay like she wants to. Like she genuinely is attached to him, and his kind smile, and his eyes, and probably that warm embrace that you’ve never let yourself experience.

You watch them, not allowing yourself to melt at the moment because you did not invite him over, nor did you give consent to bring that fucking doll house here. But you can’t say no now, as she clings to his leg when he stands up and looks at you with an almost irritated glint in his eye. 

His eyes trail all over you briefly too, as if checking for any new spots or marks that a man could have put on you. You feel seen, dipping your head to not meet his eye and scratching the back of your neck as if to hide a spot there. There isn’t a mark, it’s just…fear? nervousness? anxiety? 

And then he hauls the box in for her without saying a word to you. You watch him hard now that his back is turned. His voice sounds so loving when he speaks to your child as if she’s an equal. Plopping down on your living room floor with her and opening the large box. 

He Ooo’s and Aahhh’s with her as he pulls each piece out, connecting the walls, the doors, handing her little things to help him with. And both of them are so focused on the task at hand to create a safe space for all of her abused barbie dolls that… you feel invisible.

For the first time ever in front of them both, you feel like you are nothing but a ghost. That he is the single parent. As if you’re forgotten, less loved, not wanted, not even needed. 

There’s a bubbling in your gut when you tear up, reminding yourself that what Jay did that night was probably just, well, he’s a man. Men aim to fuck at all times usually, and you guess you should have expected it at one point from him because, again, you’re aware that he’s attracted to you. Even more aware now. 

But the way you feel right now outshines that. He’s ignoring you to keep your child happy. She is ignoring you because it seems Jay does a better job at it than you do. 

And, well, he’s not holding you down, whispering things in your ear, letting out frustrated little sighs at your drunken or drowsy words now. So, you say nothing. All you can do is go to the kitchen and prepare a snack, trying to force the tears to stay inside of you with quiet sniffles, hoping you can join their little picture perfect moment so that you can be helpful too. 

Your heart swells when they both look at you as you present a plate of snacks. You have to hold back tears again at the way their eyes shine, thanking you for the snacks. Jay’s eyes stay on you a bit longer though, as if saying “See? See what you’re making her go without?” 

You do see it. 

But…it can’t be him. As much as you wish it could be, you just can’t. There has to be another man out there just like him, one that doesn’t have a history with you that would cause whispers and questions. There has to be. 

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

That moment you witnessed seems to have solidified Jay’s place in your home. Whether it be for babysitting or simply so your child can see him when she’s asking for him (which is often.) It’s kind of an issue, actually, because now the choice isn’t yours anymore and it appears Jay knows that.

You hate that you’re forced to see him for what he is now. How he proves himself over and over again to be the man you need. The issue is that you still don’t want it to be him. The bigger issue is that he’s breaking down your walls, doing little things for you, looking at you with those dark eyes– your resolve cracks and reminds you every time he’s here that maybe it could work. Maybe you’ll give him a chance. Maybe you won’t have to go out anymore looking to fill a void that no one else fits into. 

It’s the way that now, you can’t help but to compare him to your ex husband. The man who you loved for so long, who you genuinely thought you’d spend your life with happily and safely. Now, compared to Jay, your ex seems like…nothing. Like a little crack in your resolve. He was older than you by just two years, took care of you for so long, impregnated you, and slowly but surely throughout all that time grew to resent you too.

You still don’t know why, but perhaps it’s just because you were growing into your own. You were becoming more independent, though he never had the capability to realize just how much you depended on him during the very time he left you. 

“I just don’t want to do this anymore.” Your ex had said to you on that fateful morning. 

Your belly was big as you tried to waddle up to him when he said that. You can’t help but think back now and wonder how pathetic you must have seemed when he yanked his arm from your grip, especially due to the difficulty of your pregnancy already. You were sick through most of it, only having a few good days here or there where that pregnancy glow would make your ex husband second-guess himself. 

The slam of the door after that was more exhausting than the months of pregnancy you’d gone through. It felt loud, so loud you could hear it vibrate throughout your whole body. You recall falling to the floor and carefully holding your stomach. It’s like all of the heartbreak pooled there. The loss of your husband three weeks before he got to meet the child he was supposed to love. Her little heart must have been breaking inside of you too. 

Double the pain.

And then you were mending yourself on your own. Going into labor early from stress,  your family helped take care of you more than her. You were needier. You were broken. 

And never, fucking ever, did you think you’d find yourself sitting comfortable in your lavish home realizing that your ex-husband didn’t deserve all of that pain from you. He left you for that girl, and not two months later did she leave him. 

Never did you think you’d find yourself thinking about Jay as a replacement either. Well, not a replacement, but like, maybe just…he’s the idea of a perfect dad if you pay attention to how your child talks about him. How they act together. How she cries for him before bed when he’s not there, asking you why you don’t read to her the way Jay does. Why don't you sing to her the way he does? Why don't you use the same voices for her dolls? Why you don’t cut her food like he does, why you don’t do this or that.

That’s what makes it click the most you think. The fact that Jay has given her something you never can. The love of a father. It doesn’t even feel like he’s babysitting at this point, he’s parenting, teaching her lessons, bandaging small boo-boos, fixing her hair,…cooking dinner, cleaning…existing here like he belongs.

Jay has done more for your daughter than your ex husband ever could have, more than you could have done for her too, you think. 

Even now, as you come home night after night and see him, you struggle to see him as anyone that isn’t who your daughter needs. Maybe who you need. 

His summer semester is coming to an end too, and it’s hard to see him as a college student now. He really does coursework and everything that needs to be done at your home all within a single work day? With no complaints at all? Lately, you’ve noticed that he’s been more focused on studying when he babysits too, but still your daughter listens to him better than she listens to you. 

Yet, still, it’s like you’re avoiding each other as you go through the motions, but you notice him more. You feel more discomfort because of it, mostly because you know your resolve about this is breaking. There’s a fear inside of you that revolves around him.

What if you missed your chance? 

What if it does end up being a mistake if he still wants you?

You don’t know what to do, but you know you want him. 

Some nights, Jay does sleep over due to exhaustion and you don’t even ask him to leave because you know he’s not doing it to try anything. The avoidance is loud. Lately, you come home from work and there he is, sitting up with his laptop on his lap but sound asleep, softly snoring. Each time, you remind yourself of how he’s sacrificing his study time to babysit. You know your child can be distracting and needy when she wants something too, but he doesn’t complain even a little bit. The least you could have done was bring him a blanket, which you did. And you woke the next morning to find him curled up on the same couch, laptop toppled over onto the floor.

Small, gentle acts of kindness towards each other but never face to face. You’ve woken to fresh coffee countless times, made exactly the way you like it because you know he’s watched you make it yourself. You’ve come home to re-stocked items, like milk and eggs, laundry detergent, and even toothpaste. It’s nice, and a small indication that he doesn’t resent you. Even through face-to-face avoidance on your part.

Tonight seemed different though, compared to all of the other nights when you can’t go out. You walked through the door to the smell of dinner and your child still awake, sing-songing at you the moment you walked in. 

“Dad said I can stay up late!” 

You quirk a brow, her calling him that now becoming a regular occurrence to the point it goes through one ear and out the other for you. You recall discussing her bed time though, with absolutely no exceptions.

“Did he now?” You hug her before taking off your coat, walking with her to the kitchen where you find Jay, placing down a small plate on the table with cartoon characters on it, right in front of two bigger plates with bigger portions of delicious looking food placed neatly on it.

Your heart swells, but your anxiety grows twice as big alongside it. This. 

This is what you’ve wanted for so long. This is what you never thought you could find. So, why is it that you still have push-back in your mind? Despite knowing that Jay has proven himself time and time again, you want to argue?! 

Perhaps it’s because you like the way he tries. Maybe you’re not ready to lose that feeling of being chased in some way, of being begged to let him stay. Maybe it’s because you begged your husband, desperate for him to keep you, but he left anyway. It feels like Jay gives you power over yourself, over your love-life, over everything, really. 

And if you were to actually accept his advances, even just a dinner on your table, what if he stops? What if he gets bored once he gets what he wants? After all, he’s still young, you can’t truly imagine he wants to do this forever. 

Not with you, and not with your daughter either. 

“What’s all this? Isn’t it a bit late for her to have dinner?” You question him instantly, anxiety bubbling up out of assumption alone. 

“We had a small snack a few hours ago.” Jay reassures you. “I finished my exams and had a burst of energy to celebrate, besides, it’s a Friday–” He goes to pull out a chair for you. “You don’t need to be up early either. A late dinner every now and then never hurt anybody.”

The way this is the first time the two of you have had a face-to-face conversation since…that night. His voice calms you, and that’s scary. 

You huff, happy because you could easily melt into this chair and pretend you’re having a family dinner, like you always wanted, like you never rejected a touch from him that you desperately wanted. You could just play along and pretend Jay is everything you need. Except, it wouldn’t even be pretending at this point. The whole idea of him has changed. But, again, that anxiety. You still have that little voice holding you back, no matter what you want, or what you need, you fear it’ll be ripped from you again if you were to let yourself be weak for another person.

“I’m really tired, Jongseong.” You explain, walking past the kitchen and towards your bedroom. “Thanks for dinner but I’m not too hungry and I just want to lay down.”

And with that, he watches you leave. No real appreciation, no congratulations on him finishing his exams, not even a kiss to your child’s forehead. Is he still expected to be the one to put her to sleep? 

Why is he even here? Why did he do all of this? 

His patience is running dry.

So, he eats with your child as your plate goes cold and he leaves it there. If you can’t even handle a dinner at the table with the person who cooked it, you can deal with your own fucking plate. Throw away your own fucking food, wash your own fucking dish. And if you can’t tuck your child into bed, he’ll do it, but you can shove that fake ass exhaustion right up your ass for all he cares. 

He knows you’re not exhausted. He’s seen you when you are. You’re just being an asshole to him at this point, trying to appear like you’re perfectly happy with the life you live when your drunken rants prove otherwise. You treat him like everything he does has an ulterior motive. Which, yeah, maybe it does, but he was genuinely excited to have someone celebrate the end of this semester with him. Maybe assuming you’d indulge him went too far. For the first time, he wasn’t doing it to impress you.

By the time Jay gets your daughter to bed, all tucked in with a little tune to fall asleep to, he closes her door and just stands there in the silence on the other side of it. 

You must really enjoy being a single mother, huh? This is why too. He always questioned it. You’re so attractive, so well-adjusted. You work hard, your daughter is a sunshine in this world, and you’ve not managed to find anyone to love you yet? He thought he was lucky to be the one getting to spend time with you. 

Turns out, you refuse to let anyone in despite Jay knowing, fucking seeing straight through you. You want something from someone. You need it, yearn for it, even. But it’s almost laughable at the way you refuse it. 

Excuses, excuses, excuses. 

It’s the fucking audacity you have taking advantage of him. You’ve practically led him on. You lend him everything he wants in life. That’s it. You lend it. From flaunting yourself before you go to bars, to exposing all the marks you allow other men to leave on you. Letting him stay in this house, father your child, cook, clean, mend, fix, heal. 

From being a faux-father to being minimized to a college student that you used to babysit. He’s offered you relief in so many ways including sexual, and all you fucking do is avoid, deny, fucking reject him. You still go out to bars, later and later you’ll come home with new swells against your skin, but always looking so empty and disappointed. Sometimes he thinks you try to make him jealous. Sometimes, he thinks you want him to try again. 

Sometimes, he thinks you get off on the fact that he keeps trying.

And he has tried. Albeit more gently lately, but he has. Small, lingering touches when he hands you your coat to help you get out the door and to work quicker. Starting your car for you before you leave. Fuck, he even opens the goddamn door for you. Anything to make you feel appreciated, respected, and fucking wanted.

The silence is loud in his ears due to the sheer irritation as he drops his head, staring at his feet and knowing it’ll only take a few strides to reach your bedroom. A room he still craves to be in.

He’s raided those drawers by now, because of course he has. Soiling your panties, your sheets, anything that still smells like you when you’re gone for the day, all so he can act normal upon seeing you when you come home. He’s laid in your bed by now too, wondering what it would feel like to have your weight beside him. He fantasized about anything and everything he possibly could in there.

And he’s always warmer. Always cums the hardest with weak, muffled moans as he stuffs your pillows into his mouth to keep quiet. All before cleaning every trace of himself there, closing the door, and wishing he was allowed to exist in there with you. 

Right now will be the first time Jay enters your room to your knowledge, and it sucks for him because he has essentially trained himself to get hard every time he opens this fucking door. Still, he composes himself, and it’s a bit of a shock if you’re being honest.  You thought he’d go home after this, you were kind of hoping he would after you made it so awkward. 

You felt guilty the second you saw his expression fall to your rejection of eating dinner like a big fucking happy family. You want it so bad, you want him so bad.

When you left the kitchen, you immediately went to your room and hopped in the shower, well aware that he wouldn’t follow you. You thought hard while the hot water made attempts to wash away your feelings. Would it have been so bad to just eat with him? With your daughter? With both of them? The way his eyes fell, it burned your heart a little bit.

Still, no answers came to you because you know part of you just wants to see what else he will do for you. Despite the history with him, and despite knowing his entire family would question and scoff at you for it…Is it really so wrong? To want to give him a chance just to see if he’ll leave you too? 

Just to see if it’ll hurt when he does it too?

Inviting him to your home almost every day of the week isn’t wrong, right? Forgetting to pay him all those times before, hoping to see him again and get that confidence boost, that wasn’t wrong. Letting your daughter attach herself to him when you swore he wasn’t permanent, no longer having the energy to correct her use of “dad” towards him… none of that is wrong.

 It’s all Jay. He’s the one in the wrong for willingly following along, not you. Right? 

And as you’re sitting on your bed in your towel, zoning out and staring at your floor, Jay swings your bedroom door open without a single knock, mindfully closes it, and immediately goes off on you.

Somehow, you really expected him to accept your rejection but your heart swells that he didn’t. You don’t think he ever will, and you’re exhausting yourself hoping he’ll prove you wrong.

He’s shown you enough by now. This is what breaks down that wall inside of you, isn’t it?

“What am I doing wrong?” He shoots his first question out in a desperate whisper shout, eyes searing into you before continuing without a single breath. “Because I do everything for her, and i do everything  for you, does that really make you so fucking uncomfortable?”

“J–” You try to respond, feeling your skin prickle at the sheer irritation in his expression.

He’s fighting for you.

“Isn’t that what you want?!”

“After everything I do–” He throws his hands up now, running his fingers through his hair as if you make him feel like he wants to rip it out. “After trying to make your life easy while making mine harder, for what? You to not eat the fucking food I made? For you to go to the bar all the time just to come back disappointed like I’m not right here waiting for you to come back?” 

“What ar-”

“Don’t ask me any stupid fucking questions, Just answer me.” He drops his hands, stepping up to you, placing both hands on either side of your hips, doing his best not to react to your near-naked body. “Why?”

You lean back, trying to create more distance to try and give him an answer that you don’t even know yourself, but he just keeps closing in. Not letting you escape this time. You’ve never seen him so riled up before, it’s…

Well…

“Because I came onto you? Because I tried to do what no one else will do for you?” His voice shakes when he says it, and you can feel the heat radiating from him. Is he…about to cry?

Only now, seeing him so close with an entirely sober brain do you realize an answer. Maybe not to his question of why, but to the same question you’ve been asking yourself. It’s because of that look in his eye. You’ve never been able to put a word to it, but now with him demanding you explain yourself so closely, you see it.

He’s desperate. 

Arguably as desperate as you’ve felt to fill the void. Except, he’s trying to do that for you and you won’t let him out of what? Fucking fear? Hell, at this point the history means close to nothing when it comes to all the new memories he’s made in this home, even without you. The history of babysitting him, the history of your ex husband leaving you. It doesn’t matter.

You think hard, so hard that you feel your eyes burn as you stare up at him. Glancing without intention to his jaw when he clenches it, to his neck when he swallows his words, to his lips, his eyes, the hair falling in his face…and you just–

You reach up, running a soothing hand through his hair to get it out of his face. Then you see those same desperate eyes somehow grow more desperate as he lowers them, leaning into the touch, as if you’ve been starving him the same way you’ve been starved for years. He falls silent too, cutting himself off mid-question just to feel you touch him for the first time.

“I don’t know.” You say, which seems like a better answer than having an excuse. What can you say otherwise? That it’s because it shouldn’t  be him? That you’re afraid he’ll realize he’s not ready to settle? To be a dad? He’ll ask why, and it’ll be the same answer you gave on that drunken night. An answer that you no longer care about. 

You babysat him when he was a child, but you were still a child too. 

You were still a child, and time changes things.

Your ex husband left you, and you’re afraid he will too, especially because he’s so much younger? Who cares?

Your answer seems to fly right past his head though, because he’s still leaning to feel your fingers in his hair, and he’s looking at you as if nothing you say will matter unless you make it hold some weight to him. 

“Jongseong–” You pause, scratching right at his nape, uncaring of how you can feel your towel loosening on your body. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

Somehow, his name on your lips is what he needed to hear. The tone of it, the rasp in your voice, your fingers in his hair. Actions speak louder than anything the two of you could say right now, and he can’t help it. Nothing can stop him, not even you at this point. 

He hasn’t done anything wrong you say? It’s because he fucking knows what you need.

You inhale deeply, holding your breath when you feel your back hit your mattress, his warm hands instantly taking advantage of your freshly-showered state and tugging at the towel just slightly to let it fall open. You hear a slight breath from him at that moment, an inhale. There, he climbs onto the bed, nudging himself between your legs and trapping you there under him, both hands holding your arms down.

Like he’s afraid you’ll reject him again.

“You’re going to let me take care of you now.” He demands, though to him it sounds more like a plea solely due to the fact that he’s so fucking turned on it’s unreal. That feeling of when your fingers were in his hair? Seeing your naked body? Unshaved pussy? Being in this fucking room with you? It throws him into overdrive, especially with the way you just lay there blinking up at him in surprise. The anger melting away only amplifies it more. 

How could you do this to him? Genuinely, how could you have let him fucking suffer for you like this? 

Still, you blink up as if you’re a deer caught in headlights and it makes his heart thump against his ribcage. Your eyes are so bright, that glint of sadness he had seen so many times isn’t there right now. And there’s so much adrenaline inside of him, like he needs to move fast before you change your mind again. You’ve not let him do this for some fucking reason or another and now you’re just laying here for him.

 There, with your entire body on display, and you appear to be docile. Fucking obedient? Like he always knew you would be if you’d just drop the fucking act?! You were meant for him and him alone, and he’s going to show you why.

In all honesty, you’re tired of denying yourself by now. From the moment you saw him that day cleaning your pool for the first time, you’ve wanted him on some level. It wasn’t an emotional attachment, but a hope, a fantasy for you. And when you recognized him, you were more impressed with him than embarrassed. You tried not to let your eyes wander out of guilt, out of feeling like a pervert. 

And then, that day when he came onto you, he was just a man to you. Your faux guilt kept you from letting him, and your hope to be chased kept you from it too. As if you’ve never pleasured yourself to the thought of him, shamefully in this very bed. As if you’ve never called out his name with a silent breath. If you keep going at this point, you’ll lose him before ever knowing what he could really be for you. 

This is his last ditch effort to beat you at your own game, and you’re ready to lose.

  So, now, you let yourself get lost in him. In  his eyes and the way he pleads and makes his demands. He probably doesn’t recognize his strength against you right now, or how much it’s turning you on. With the way he has both hands on your wrists, probably bruising them, and there’s nothing you could do even if you wanted to. His weight holding you down feels better than you imagined. 

After so long, with so many failed hookups where you’ve told them of your daughter and all they’ve done in return is get their orgasm then leave…Jay. He wants to take care of you? 

He wants to…give you what you need?

Fuck, you know he can. That’s the fucked up part. He’s proved it so many times to you in so many ways. You’ve watched him, the way he moves and acts around you. He’s exactly what you need. You pushed him to this point, where his sanity is on the brink of crashing. Taking it away from him again feels wrong, because it’s exactly what you want.

And when he presses his leg between yours, he knows.

“Again?” He comments, now releasing your wrist from one hand and running it down, able to slip his fingers right into the slick of your bare pussy. “You’re wet.” 

You still just blink up at him with an intake of breath at the pleasure, thoughts running left and right on what to do, finally realizing you don’t want to do a damn thing. He’d do it all if you let him. Clean your house, be a father, fix all of the breaks, make you wet.

And you just feel him, the way his fingers play around with what he does to you. You can practically feel his confidence rise at the way you spread your legs a bit more, as if to give him more access. When you look at him, his expression remains harsh, but slowly he moves himself down, lips brushing over one of your nipples while keeping eye contact.

Still that irritated look, like he’s mad you haven’t let him do this before now.

“How many times are you going to pretend like I’m not the one who gets you wet?” He asks before rubbing circles around your clit, tongue flicking in the same way around your nipple. “Like I don’t have a right to take care of you?”

Your breath is still caught in your throat, trying to be careful about what you say right now despite knowing you can’t speak. You focus on what he’s doing instead, losing yourself to something you’ve not felt in far, far too long. 

He’s right. He’s gotten you wet more than once by now. More than he knows. 

And goddamn, he knew your tits could bounce, but the way they move without the support of a bra, the plush, soft feeling of your nipple growing erect in his mouth, all for him to bite and pull at. He does it too, listening to the little seething sound of pain from you when he pulls all the way back with your nipple between his teeth. Only to let it fall from his mouth and break eye contact with you to see the jiggle as it falls.

His cock twitches, at everything that you are right now, feeling more pleasure through seeing you like this alone compared to fucking his own fist on your bedroom floor. He notes how your legs squeeze him more at the nipple stimulation than his fingers too, memorizing the way your labia falls open between them. He smirks, flicking his tongue more, quicker. 

There. There it is.

A low rumble in your chest falls from your lips. Soft, a moan. A very small, delicate sound.

“You like this?” Jay asks, looking up at you, letting his tongue fall from his mouth again and flicking the erect nub. “When I play with your tits?”

You nod, throwing an arm over your face in embarrassment that this is actually happening. You’re letting him. Already you feel yourself heat up more, even when he takes his fingers away from your clit and instead, uses them to flick your other nipple. 

And he does this for a few minutes. Paying special attention to your tits, going back and forth with his fingers and tongue to each bud, trying so hard to not stop just to shove his cock between them and use them the way he’s always wanted. He focuses on drawing out more and more little sounds from you instead, slurping his own saliva from your painfully erect nipples, pulling back, blowing cold air, then warming it up again with his lips. All while simultaneously groping, flicking, and pinching with his other hand. 

“Jesus, Jay–” You moan quietly, chest rising and falling as he squeezes and licks against you. 

That’s right, say his name. Let him fucking know he’s doing what you like. Jay thinks, feeling his cock weep in his pants as he does it. Wondering just how sensitive you are to be reacting like this to simple nipple stimulation. God, he’s wanted to suck on these for so long, and now you’re letting him. They’re so big, so plush. He wants to fucking cover them with his mouth, he wants to bury his face in them, kiss them all over them. 

And if they were to get bigger? He moans at the thought, remembering that conversation you had with your mom. You want another. He bets they’d swell up–Oh, fuck yeah. They’d probably hurt to rub against your shirt. God, fuck, he can’t control his thoughts right now.

 Finally. 

Fucking finally, he has you and he’s not going to let you run away again.

He doesn’t fucking care if it’s forward. He wants what he wants, you want what you want. That want just so happens to line up. Besides, he’s already proved himself to you, he knows it. If you’re letting him do this, maybe you’d let him stay like this. 

“Did they get bigger?” He moans briefly as he swaps to your other nipple again. “So full, so heavy, were they leaking all over you?”

You listen to him, trying not to feel the pit in your stomach bubble with even more arousal at his blatant and dirty words, feeling your clit throb at the stimulation your tits are getting right now. 

“Makes my dick fucking throb just thinking about it. Fuck–” 

“Let me give you another,” He mumbles now, almost mindlessly before looking up at you with an intense gaze as he bites down, indicating that he’s not mindless about it at all. 

“Swell you up, make you glow–”

Oh. 

Why is that– why are you dripping?

He hears that moan you let out. Different from the others, almost desperate.

“Mm, yeah.” He encourages it, now allowing his hand to travel back down to witness how much wetter you’ve gotten at those words. So messy, so perfect. “Knew you’d want it raw.”

You can’t help the nod, as it comes before you even process his words solely because you feel his fingers slip inside of you. You haven’t been this wet in so, so long. You want to feel it. To be full again, of anything. Of him.

“Ye-” You start, interrupting yourself with a bite of your lip and your eyes rolling back. 

“That’s right mama,” He coos, tilting his fingers up and amplifying the pressure inside of you. “Gonna let me take good care of this pussy, yeah?” He adds, lifting from your tits and ghosting his lips over yours. 

He watches you closely, that daze in your eye. God, you look so horny right now. There’s nothing more he wants than to see this time and time again. To let you wake up every morning with his warm cum inside of you, to see your belly swell with his child, to see your tits grow until they hurt. 

He’d take care of you. He’d take good fucking care of you. 

“Say something.” Jay whispers against your lips, darting his tongue out against your lips, angling his fingers up and making you moan. “Say you want me to give it to you raw.”

You open your mouth, feeling his tongue lick and swallow up that moan you just gave him before you try to compose yourself. You can’t help it, you’re so, so sensitive right now and you can’t help but find it incredibly sexy to be here, laid bare, while he’s still fully clothed.

Like he really is doing this for you. He’s not trying to get his own orgasm and leave. You’re weak and those words of “let me give you another” shines in your head. Weak, you’re weak. You should be thinking about condoms, you should be thinking about the consequences of this. 

But you’re not. 

You do like it raw.

“Jay–” You stutter as you try to grasp the reality of his words, feeling his fingers repeatedly hit right where you need it. “I’m…not protected.”

He moans. Loudly, before huffing out an irritated groan.

“You must really want it then.” He narrows his eyes at you. “Going out all the time trying to get fucked–” 

He plunges his fingers in again, deep, and holds them there as he pulls back to look at you. To really look at you, then he glares.

“You’d really let just some fucking dude give you a baby?” 

You repeatedly shake your head. 

“No!” You retort, thrusting your hips up. “I just–”

“Mhm,” He pulls his fingers out now, sliding himself down so fast that you can barely comprehend him sucking your clit into his mouth before pulling back in a moan at the taste of you. “If mama wants another, daddy will give her one.” He says now, as if to pacify you.

As if to give you everything. 

And you’d argue, really, you would.  You want another child so bad, but this is– it’s too soon. You haven’t even established a relationship with him yet. Boundaries haven’t been discussed. His college plan– but fuck it’s not entirely your fault that you’re like, super turned on by the idea of it. To the thought of being so filled with cum that there’s no possible way you couldn’t end up pregnant. An indication that, no matter what, no man at a club could fulfill the arousal for you even if they cared to do it. 

You’d never have let them actually fuck you raw. 

Jay though…how can you keep telling him no?

How could you reject him again when you want it so badly? 

Fuck now, think later.

“Yeah–” You say against your better judgement, hands reaching down to his hair so you can grind up against his mouth, lost to the arousal as you mimic what he referred to himself as. “Daddy?”

You feel his mouth fall slack at that, as if you’re accepting him in full now. You feel your clit hit nothing in his open mouth, but it throbs harder. 

 He knew you were slightly into him for letting him do this at all, but now, you’re truly accepting it. Like you know he’ll fucking do it, like you want him to fucking do it.

“That’s right,” He moans against your clit as he licks at it, barely able to comprehend your voice calling him that but clinging to it all the same.  “Gonna let daddy do it all for you.”  

Yeah. You are. You’re gonna let him do it. All of it. 

And then, the room is enveloped in quiet moans, more from Jay than from you due to your breath being stuck in your throat. His tongue, licking every part of your sensitive cunt, his hands reaching back up to your tits, fondling, pinching, painfully tugging at them as he moans louder, louder, louder for you to want him.

He presses his hips up and against your mattress as he tastes you, so deeply it hurts his cock to neglect it like this. Each rub feels raw, twitching and pulsing to be let out, to be inside of you, on you, against you. Filling you up with his cum, plugging it in as a promise that you can’t leave him even if you wanted to. 

He’s going to fucking do exactly what he said he would. 

And only when you feel his tongue lap against your hole do you finally release your breath, “Daddy” coming out in a choked back sob. It breaks him, his body going into overdrive as he pulls back and just– stares at you with wild eyes. 

You stare back up at him, knowing that calling him that means something more than a cringe little roleplay kink. It means something deeper to him. He wants to be a dad, a real one.

“Oh yeah?” He finally says, hands going straight to his button and zipper. 

You can’t help it, biting your lower lip as you blink up, watching his shoulders move, the veins on his arms protruding as he rushes to pull it out and– oh. You moan at it, the way his heavy, slicked up, cock falls out, heavy, needy. 

“Daddy–” You urge him on, knowing that it’s driving him absolutely insane. 

“Mhm?” He shuffles himself off the bed, letting his pants drop as he lifts his shirt off of him and fucking glares at your tits. “You want daddy’s cock?”  He adds now, shooting his eyes up to you as both of his hands land on your legs.

Your mind goes blank when you feel him slide his hands around to the back of your thighs, pushing your legs forward, curling you in on yourself, forcing your pussy to be out and on display for him. 

And you watch him, the way he stares down at it. It’s embarrassing to be so seen right now, not having expected to get fucked open by anyone tonight, let alone him. You probably should have shaved or something, or like, not gotten out of the habit in the first place. But he moans at it, mouth falling open at the fact that you are entirely a fucking woman. 

A fucking mother.

The prettiest pussy he’s ever fucking seen let alone tasted.

And he moans, breaking the silence, forgetting only for a moment how long he’s been wanting this. It boosts your confidence more than you’ve ever felt. His reaction to this is more than your ex husband’s reaction to you when you were pristine and borderline pornstar quality. 

Jay doesn’t see you as used and neglected, he just sees you. And this. This is the pussy he wants. This is what he wants to put his baby in. 

When he flicks his eyes back to you, with that same open mouthed expression, it knocks the breath out of you. There’s so much love in his eyes, or maybe lust, you don’t care. You think you’re matching that expression for him too, because it’s like he can’t hold back anymore. He can’t just sit and look at you anymore. 

He just can’t.

And you feel it, his thick head pushing past the tightened, pulsing hole and not stopping. He pushes in slowly, painfully slow, to the point you’re both looking at each other with a slack jaw. Finally. The pain of it, the pleasure, the fucking need you’ve been trying to fulfill. 

That look on your face drives him wild too, he knows he has you by now. You like it, you love the way he slides in and makes damn sure you feel it the way he does. Every second of the slide pries you open, and he wants to remember this moment forever. He wants you to fucking remember too. 

Wants you to know that no one will ever fit inside of you so perfectly, so deeply.

When he finally bottoms out, he leans forward to keep himself buried deep as he ghosts his lips over yours. He feels the way you try to kiss him, but he pulls back with a confident smirk. 

“When was the last time you’ve felt a cock so deep in you?” He whispers hotly, knowing you need not answer. Knowing you won’t answer, not with the way you’re instantly lifting your head and kissing him. 

Your pussy pulses around him when you lick into his mouth, the first real kiss sending his heart soaring. He twitches inside of you with each squeeze, and kisses you harder, deeper. And somehow, it brings tears to your eyes. 

The way he kisses, the way he makes you feel him. Fuck, the way he makes you feel whole, so wanted, like you’re amazing to him. In more ways than just a body to fuck, but he’s stuck around despite all of your avoidance and rejections. You hope you’re making it worth it. 

Fuck, you need to feel worth it to him.

“You’d better not fucking pull out.” You groan through a breath, his lips still kissing you through your words as he finally pulls his hips back, fucking in once. 

Hard.

Honestly, could you have said anything else at this moment? He’s trying to make this last, he needs it to last. If you keep fucking talking, saying everything he’s ever wanted to hear– 

“Fuck,”  He moans, his hands moving up to your cheeks as he licks into your mouth. “You can’t–”  He continues, fucking in again, moving your body up with each thrust do to the sheer force of him trying to plunge in as deep as he can. “You can’t fucking say that to me right now.”

You’re seeing stars though, unable to say anything else as your eyes roll back at the way the head of his cock practically kisses your cervix with each push into you. He’s so rough, so desperate for it. 

You don’t think he expected you to respond either, with the way he keeps his lips on yours, his body pressed so closely that having your legs to your chest means nothing to him now. Mating press be damned, he’s lost his mind to the feeling, not the aesthetic of being a fucking dad. 

Your legs wrap around him instead, and he’s all to happy to feel it. Your legs hug him the same way your arms do, the same way your pussy does, and he’s fucking in love with you. 

He braces one hand back against your leg, holding it against his hips as he continues to fuck forward, still at the same pace. Deep and with purpose. Every few seconds the bursts of pleasure run through him, making him shiver and moan into your mouth. Little grunts, near whimpers for you to let him give you the world. 

More than this. More than fucking, more than taking care of you, more than anything he could ever possibly give you. He’ll find a way. 

And then, you’re clenching hard, matching his near-whimpers except moaning in full pants, babbling and drooling cries against his mouth. 

“Mama–” Jay soothes, continuing his pace as he tilts his head back to get a good look at that lost gaze in your eyes. “You’re crying?”

You nod with a laugh, tears rolling down the same way the wet of your cunt slips down your ass. You’ve never felt so good, so fucking full.  And for some reason, that does him in. Making it last be damned, he genuinely thinks he’s won you over. He can make it last next time, he can do more next time, he can–

He leans back all the way now, onto his knees as your legs try to hug him back to you, and his eyes go straight back to those tits. The way he made a promise. The way they bounce, slick with his sweat from pressing against you. 

“Fuck, you’re so pretty.” He grunts in a breath, now quickening his pace and snapping his hips. Pulling out all the way briefly to plunge into your again. “Can’t get any deeper–” He continues, flicking his eyes from your face, to your tits, to that beautiful pussy of yours swallowing him up. 

Now his eyes roll back, hands going back to your thighs to push you back into position. No way in hell can he last, not at a pace like this, inside of a woman like you. 

“Don’t pull out.” You repeat again in a breath, seeing his face and the way he focuses solely on you. You know he’s going to cum, and you want him to. You want to feel it, every single fucking drop of it. 

“Yeah?” He nods his head with laser-focus on your pussy now, staring down as he points tight, short thrusts inside of you. “Momma wants my cum? Hm?”

Oh, he’s fucking gone.

“She likes it?” He continues to talk himself up. “Likes being so fucking full of it? Yeah?” 

Goddamn, fuck, he’s insane. 

“Yes, daddy!” You whisper-shout, fingers shooting to your clit, other hand raising to your mouth to silence the moans as to not be too loud. 

“Fuck, yeah you do.”  He lets out a near growl, his voice low and rumbled as he slaps your hand away, pressing hard on your clit with his thumb as he buries himself in you once more and stiffening his abs. “That’s right.”

And instantly upon feeling him pulse, that first spurt of cum painting your insides, you lose yourself with him. Your fingers drop from your mouth and you release a pornographic moan for him, rutting yourself against him, as if to fuck it deeper into you. 

It only prolongs the orgasm though, for both of you. 

Jay is silent, trying to keep his eyes open through the pleasure as you pulse and squirt around him, his thumb pressing so hard  into your clit, his cock cumming so deep, filling you up so well– He wants to see it. Wants to watch you fall apart for him. Wants to witness the way you let him do this. 

And he holds himself there, so hard and so full of pleasure for you. Keeping himself practically impaled against your cervix until your body falls slack. Still, he fucks it into you, holding you in place with a softer moan now. No longer guttural or deep from his chest. His breathing is rough, a soft, near feminine moan leaves his lips as he falls forward onto you. 

You wince along with him at the sensitivity, panting, a sweating tangle of a mess the two of you have become. And it’s the fact that it’s the first time you’ve ever gotten off at the same time as someone else. You feel…soft. 

Your hands find their way to his hair as his face squished against your tits while he regains breath, not daring to move his hips because your pussy is too warm to leave right now. You brush the sweat-slicked hair out of his eyes, running your fingers all the way back to his nap, and then slowly down his back to rub and scratch.

He shivers at the feeling, humming the same feminine-tone he had released previously. And all he can do is hear your heart thumping against your chest, even through these soft tits of a pillow he’s lying against.

Jay never wants to move again, not from this spot, ever. 

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

“You know I’m in love with you, right?” Jay mentions briefly after a long moment of silence, looking up at you with his wet hair. 

Deep in the night, your food still cold and on the table, you’ve found yourself freshly showered and on your living room couch with Jay’s head on your lap. He made sure to have stayed long enough inside of you to implant…something if it was going to happen. So he didn’t argue a shower, and you didn’t argue letting him join you either. 

He had washed you, gently running his hands between your legs with what you can only describe as the softest, most alluring face a man has ever given you. Like he won the lottery, or found the answer to eternal life or something. You repaid him by letting him admire your tits again while you jerked him off, but that’s besides the point. 

“Like, I’m not going to leave. I hope you know that.” He adds with a soft groan to your hands still in his hair. His new favorite thing. 

You look down at him, hand moving to his cheek as the words hit you in the chest.

There’s anxiety along with happiness, at all of the boundaries and serious conversations that will need to be had now, but still, you feel like you’re glowing when he looks at you.

He didn’t even have to say it, and arguably you probably don’t need to say it back either. You think he sees it in you. Even if he didn’t, you think he’d take anything you give to him and cling to it. After all, it only took one time for you to break entirely for him. 

“Are you now?” You smile with a chuckle, looking back to the tv and pretending to watch it. “Well, that’s good. Otherwise I’d be making you go get a plan B or something.” 

His eyes narrow at you.

“Like hell I’d let you, even if I didn’t love you.” He groans. “But I do, so don’t ever say that shit again.”

You chuckle, feeling the calm in your home that once felt so chaotic. It’s quiet now, both inside and outside of your head. 

“Congratulations, by the way.”

He looks at you with question, quirking a brow.

“For finishing your finals, I mean.” You smile, going back to petting through his hair and feeling like you’re on top of the world, despite what you assume to become half of your world lying his head on top of you. 

“Oh, right.” He smiles, now turning his head to watch the tv. “I probably failed them.”

You don’t believe that, but even if he did, you think you could be what he needs too. He wouldn’t have to work if he didn’t want to.

If he’s really in love with you, all he’d have to do is…not leave. 

“Are you sure you want to be having these conversations with me? You can just call it a hook-up.” You finally say, hoping he means it, knowing it breaks your heart a bit to give him an out. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m going to trap you here just because I’m a little smitten too.” 

Jay glares, blinking up at you.

“I literally just tried to put a baby in you.” 

That’s fair. 

“And you’re not going to run off? Get cold feet?” 

“Can you stop doubting me and just let me do what I want for once?” He argues playfully. “Do you even know how much that barbie fucking dream house costed me? I couldn’t run even if, for some stupid ass reason, wanted to. I love her too.”

Silence for a moment.

“Maybe even more than I love you.” 

You really, really, want to believe him.

So, you do. ・・・・・・・・・・・・・・ please remember to like and reblog! feedback would be lovely too, of course ; 3 ; i'm not below begging.