The Comic Nerd Within Me Has Awoken

Clark, after he and Bruce start dating: *assumes that Bruce would scoff at cuddling and mentally forming an intricate 30 step plan to slowly coax Bruce into cuddling over time so that eventually they can cuddle while sleeping when they start staying over*

Bruce, the very first time Clark stays the night: *sprawled on top of him, head cushioned on Clark’s comfy and squishy pecks, drooling slightly*

Clark, holding back tears of joy: 🥹

Okay but imagine the Justice League, it’s a quiet day at the watchtower and Batman is in a rare good mood. They are chatting together after a meeting when someone, I imagine Hal or Barry, starts discussing Love Languages and what they think each of theirs is others and to themselves. 

Bruce, in a rare good mood, jokingly says his love acceptance language is physical touch of course. The others, knowing of Batman’s infamous death glare anytime someone so much as enters his personal space let alone touches him. It’s funny to imagine the man who punched Hal while unconscious when he accidentally brushed past him while he was sleeping to have his Love Language be Love, and Bruce genuinely need mean for it to be a joke, so the others laugh. All expect Clark. 

Clark however, can’t help but think of the loneliness of it all. If physical affection was how Bruce felt love, then what did it say about the man who refused to be let others touch him? Who couldn’t accept a friendly pat on the shoulder without tensing up. How much trauma must have happened for him to fear Love. 

Cue Superman, to the confusion of both Batman and the rest of the league, treating Batman like a stray cat and trying to slowly introduce Non Scary Touch Because We Love You While Also Making Sure I Have Consent For This Because Your Comfort Is Important To Me. 

Maybe this is pre-superbat and misunderstandings abound as Bruce tries to show love through (actual love language) while Clark laments about the fact that Bruce still won’t touch him. Or maybe it is early days in the justice league and no one knows each other well, so Superman is still somewhat terrified of Batman but is willing to Brave The Glare anyway, because even emo-bat-vigilantes-who-potentially-still-want-to-kill-you-with-kryptonite deserve to feel loved.

Bully has a crush... 😏

Jason is shooting one day and realizes he's technically just shot well enough to beat the Olympic record and thinks it would be funny if he didn't tell anyone he was competing. He goes through all the qualifiers and the next thing his family knows he wins Olympic silver (I think you all know where I'm going with this). He shoots with his hand in his pocket as if this isn't a big deal. It really isn't - not to him.

When Dick realizes what's happened and Jason shows up at the manor casually wearing his medal - which complements his hair really nicely, if Jason's being honest and is half the reason he held back and didn't grab the gold medal instead - Dick is nonplussed and his competitive streak wins out. It doesn't even matter that he and Jason are not even remotely in the same sport. When Team USA asks him to compete in the next Olympics he agrees and takes home gold.

Jason is secretly pleased. This is the other reason he took home silver on purpose - so that Dick would have room to completely obliterate him and take home gold. It's not enough just to tie and Jason knows it. For either of them they have to win.

Although, now Jason has an itch to compete again and beat Dick and take home more medals than his brother. If they're both going to be Olympians then the games are on.

In the DC universe there's a petition with over five hundred thousand signatures asking Batman to let Robin represent the USA on the male gymnastic team

Clark: Can you please just hold still? Do you want to bleed all over the bathroom?

Bruce: Are you sure you know what you’re doing?

Clark: Trust me, I’ve seen Alfred bandage you enough times to know how to do it with my eyes closed. Seriously Bruce, I can’t believe you! Were you really going to silently sit through the meeting while you’re bleeding out from your ripped stitches?

Bruce: Ugh, spare me the lecture and just help me. We need to get back to the meeting soon. I don’t need to give your boss any more reason to give me dirty looks across the room.

Clark: That’s just Perry’s default expression.

The door to the bathroom opens and someone steps in. Bruce immediately yanks Clark in close to block his injuries from view. Clark slams his hands on either side of him with a grunt, careful not to crush him.

Jimmy: Clark? [stares at the half-dressed Bruce underneath him] Mr Wayne??

Clark: J-Jimmy!

Bruce: [angrily whispering to Clark] You forgot to lock the door didn’t you? Get rid of him. Now.

Clark: Jimmy, this is not what it looks like! Me and Mr Wayne uhh… We’re just uhh…

Bruce: [Moans when Clark accidentally brushes against his wound]

Jimmy: Umm…

Clark: [whispering] Sorry!

Bruce: Hi Jimmy~ Care to join the fun?

Jimmy: N-No! Sorry to interrupt you guys! I-I mean, I don’t think I need to use the bathroom after all. See you around, bye! [flees the bathroom]

Confession

When I first read David Corenswet's name in correlation with Superman/Clark Kent my brain automatically autocorrected it to Corn Sweet because....... Kansas Farm Boy..... And I know that's not really his name but I will probably forever see him and he will be My Cornsweet Superman

The Watchtower Cafeteria, post-mission

Ollie: “God, Bats is so annoying. Don’t you ever just want to shut him up?”

Clark, immediately: “With my mouth. Yeah.”

Ollie:

Hal:

Dinah:

Clark:

Ollie: “I think that was an inside thought, buddy.”

My personal headcanon of the Superbat love square

(Based purely off the belief that Bruce Wayne can’t resist a nerd in glasses)

Just found out that many animal species can produce vitamin C on their own. 

Now I hc that Kryptonian bodies produce vitamin C themselves, and contain more of it than human bodies, which offers a variety of health benefits, such as stronger immune systems, faster healing process and growth, healthier teeth, bones and joints and lower high blood pressure.

Bart: So your half Superman-half Lex Luther right?

Kon, grumbling: yes.

Bart: Does that mean you’re genetically predisposed to loosing your hair?

Kon:

Bart:

*4 hours Later*

Kon: What do you mean you don’t know how he lost his hair?

Tim: I mean I’ve been through 20 years of articles and none of them mention it. There’s like a five year gap between the last picture of him with hair and his first appearance bald.

Kon: Tim, you’re one of the world’s greatest detectives, I need you to find out how he lost his hair.

Tim: Why does it-

Kon: I can’t be bald, Tim!

Tim:

Tim: You could call and ask-

Kon: I’d rather go bald, thanks.