Having ADHD Is So Fun Because Sometimes Youre Looking For Something That You Use Regularly And Definitely

My thoughts on En ami S7E15 , also Mulder is royally pissed- love it.

My analysis- i spent too much time thinking about it due to the controversy. Please note revival spoilers***, do bookmark and revisit this when you're up to date. I spilled my gut..

3-5 min read :)

CSM- A father figure

He mentioned his affection for Mulder and Scully. He essentially created them. Mulder's obsessive quest for the truth, especially surrounding his sister's abduction was orchestrated by him.

He loved Mulder. He was seen to be mourning (privately) when Mulder was "dead" S4E24 S05E01. He protected him, not selflessly of course. Likewise, he protected Scully. CSM had no qualms about assassinating powerful figures throughout his life—it would’ve been easy for him to eliminate Mulder and Scully if he had truly wanted to. But he didn’t.

Father (metaphorically) of the miracle 

"How else do you explain that fearless devotion to a man obsessed, and, yet, a life alone? You'd die for Mulder but you won't allow yourself to love him."

Beautifully said by CSM. He observed, knew and understood Scully and Mulder as though as they were his own children.

Let's ponder what happened in the revival (spoilers ***), stay with me before you roll your eyes, gag or BOTH. The notion of CSM being the father of William can be seen as metaphorically. Please hear me out ..

Sometimes it takes an outsider to point out the obvious- to enlighten Scully. The invisible wall came down and she finally gave herself a chance to love Mulder — ultimately led to William's conception. In that sense, CSM is, indirectly, the “creator” of William. Okay maybe too much credit to CSM... read on

Yes, CSM spun the narrative to suit his agendas—he always does. The “William parentage” twist, written by Chris Carter, was deeply disturbing for many. But it got people talking. The show never fully explored this claim, and considering CSM’s long history of lies, I believe it was another one. After all, the producers and Carter himself have repeatedly confirmed that William is the biological child of M&S.

En Ami (french) —as a friend He wanted to be an ally. He chose to keep Mulder in the dark for obvious reason. He chose Scully because she was a scientist (discussed later) and also because she was altruistic(not to say Mulder wasn't). She was a scientist and a medical doctor and hence possessed the skillset which ultimately made her the "ideal" person to contact for this mission- using Scully to destroy disc.

In the car, he picked up a cigarette, then proceeded to discard it —said "maybe it is time to stop", hinting that it was time to be an ally. His smoking was a reflection of anxieties and guilt due to his past and position within the Syndicate (as revealed in the Musing of the CSM episode). So that scene (to stop smoking) showed that he thought about being good, to be an ally to Scully - ultimately Mulder and humanity.

Why Scully? No, I do not believe Scully acted out of character. A good scientist is inherently inquisitive. She was compassionate. It is my opinion that no man in this universe deserves such great power to heal, let alone holds the secrets to curing all diseases. We are not meant to be immortals. Natural selection must runs its course! The knowledge the disc contained could very well doom humanity. Let’s be honest—humans are selfish by nature. Neither Scully nor Mulder could protect that information from the world forever.

En Ami or Enemy? (pardon the tongue twist, also not a native speaker) A true villain always believes in the righteousness of their cause.

Two ways to view the action of CSM:

He was trying to be an ally to humanity by destroying the disc.

(More plausible reason) He extracted what he needed from the disc to heal himself, then destroyed it to ensure he remained at the top of the food chain. In doing so, he once again became a villain to Mulder and Scully, having used Scully in a selfish mission under the pretense of goodwill. Therefore proceeded to smoke again as he deals with the weight of the world's darkest secrets.

The concept of “scientific impregnation” could also be spun into this narrative. Alien technology might have been used to repair Scully’s DNA, enabling her to conceive again. No (sexual) violation involved—just a cutaneous prick/jab of alien tech. Like your parents vaccinated you as a kid- you weren't given a choice were you? A “gift” (in CSM's opinion) to Scully, offered under the guise of friendship or guilt- WHO KNOWS....

Alternatively—or additionally—CSM may be seen as a metaphorical father to William. He thought his manipulation and carefully chosen words could have opened Scully’s heart to Mulder, ultimately leading to the child’s miraculous conception, possibly aided by alien tech.

Last but not least, it was a beautiful performance piece by Gillian Anderson, William B. Davis, and David Duchovny. The episode was more layered and nuanced than I remembered. Mulder was royally pissed and I love it!

god what I wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall in a 1998 cinema watching x files fans process the almost kiss

like did it become a twilight midnight screening in there?

Me watching The X-Files: Ah yes, another episode where:

Something weird happens

Mulder says “it’s aliens/ghosts/a lizard man”

Scully says “no Mulder it’s just swamp gas and mass hysteria”

They investigate anyway

Things get progressively weirder

The weird thing solves itself

Mulder stares pensively into the night

Scully files a report that says literally none of it happened

They both go home like “welp that was strange”

[Cue credits]

"every possible kind of content can be found on the internet" yeah sure except for the One fucking thing I'm looking for. why does no one want to talk about the One Singular thing I'm looking for. but yeah other than that everything is on here.

i could fix² her¹

¹her = mom's computer (forcefully "upgraded" to windows 11) ²fix = install linux on it

Ended up putting some finishing touches on that sketch of AWLB AU Nightmare, still got art block, but at least its something lol