“I’ve Never Been Sexually Assaulted In A Drag Show, But I Have Been In Church. Twice.” — Local

She’s right, and we should take it to heart.

(Not one person—including Ashley—is confused about how misogynistic and racist our society is. But she’s correct. We just have put in the work and get people to the polls.)

Joe Biden, coherently and normally: I have three issues to speak about. First, the NATO conference went well. Second, the economy is back on track and inflation is down. Third, my proposal for a ceasefire in Gaza is moving forward. Any questions?

The media: Did You Know That You Are Old

Can Kamala Harris win? Does she really stand a chance? I’m so scared for my American friends, their families and every kind, decent human being who resides there.

She has a motherfucking chance because we are going to GIVE her a motherfucking chance.

No more talking about how "of course" the country won't elect a black woman (they also thought that with Obama in 2008). No more dooming. We can destroy the fucking billionaire donors as soon as the election is over. We can do everything else as soon as we have time to do it because we are not being fucked in the ass by Trump and his despicable orange fascists.

We are going to rally the fuck behind Kamala Harris and we are going to do it now. We are going to support whichever VP she chooses. We are going to be on the fucking lookout for any Purity Police whining about how Kamala isn't good enough either. We are going to keep our eyes fucking open for the Russian interference that frankly, I suspect, contributed heavily to this in the first place. We are going to learn our fucking lesson from 2016 and not whine about Third Party Protest Votes. We are going to pull together and quit fucking whining. Now Biden is out. You don't have to cOnDeSceNd yourself to voting for him. You are going to fucking help us get Kamala in office so fucking help us God. Then we can deal with the rest of it later. It is that simple.

The end.