Just Give This Guy A Breakkkk

The Beast is calling

Tell him I’m not here. Let’s hide

Where? In garbage. Natch

The gods not understanding how demigod kids work😂 I’m just waiting for the moment one of their kids gets a paper cut or something and they’re just like, “PAPER! THEY SOMEHOW GET HURT BY PAPER!”

Okay, but the duality of human beings is SO wild that I’m positive this information would absolutely break them.

There are humans that can survive great heights? But only sometimes? And other times they die? It is really just up to chance and how you land?

Humans can fall down a flight of stairs and say they’re completely fine, but PAPER hurts them and they whine about it all day?

Gunshot wounds? Yeah, we can recover from that (well, depending on where you’re hit, maybe). As long as invisible bacteria doesn’t get into the wound without us noticing... then we might die even if the blood is gone and wound sewn up.

Zeus is like “There are people out there who survive my lightning strikes?” and then learns the same person died like.... three hours later from choking on a hotdog.

Hermes, with a magazine: Athena! Look at this. It says here that 1 in every 15,000 humans die from exercising too much.

Athena: But... they need exercise? All my research says they need exercise!

Annabeth: You did hear the one in FIFTEEN THOUSAND part, right?

Hades: HOW ARE THEY DYING FROM DOING THE THING THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO DO! DAMNIT!

Then you have Demeter running in like:

Demeter: KILL THE MOSQUITOES! KILL THE MOSQUITOES!!!

Ares: Why?

Demeter: Look at this! I ran the numbers while in the Underworld while visiting Persephone. One million people die a YEAR from mosquitoes. We have to kill them.

Ares: There’s no way these punks are dying from these tiny bugs.

Demeter: Apparently, they carry diseases.

Ares, softly: ...holy shit. Biological warfare.

Apollo, flipping a table: IS NOTHING ON THIS GODDAMN PLANET SAFE ANYMORE?!

Chiron, still trying to explain everything: Nothing on this planet was ever safe at any point... ever.

Athena: Pandora’s box?

Chiron: You guys pin wayyyyy too much on that poor girl.

Later on, you have Nico walking up in bubble wrap like ‘okay, which one of y’all told the gods that it hurts when we stub our toes?’ and you got Piper in helmet and knee pads all bitter like ‘It wasn’t me’ and Will is just looking so guilty before quietly going ‘I just wanted to explain how nerves worked’

They try to explain it all to the gods and it just... gets so much worse.

Zeus: So... the medicine... that heals you.... can also kill you...?

Will: I mean, if you overdose, yeah. It’s the same with ambrosia-

Hermes: AMBROSIA CAN KILL YOU!?

Percy: HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THIS?!

Hephaestus: That’s it. All of you are too fragile. We’re going to have to make a safer planet. This is ridiculous. Maybe we can just put them all on Venus or something-

Leo: We need oxygen to survive, Dad.

Ares: You’re kidding me, right?

Annabeth: Um, no, but... well... we can’t actually have too much oxygen or we’ll-

Poseidon: LET ME GUESS! You die?! For the love of Rhea! How has anyone survived anything?

Nico: Well... we all end up dead at some point, so arguably... we don’t survive?

And finally:

Jason: you guys created humans. Why don't you know this?

Zeus: No. Prometheus created humans and quite frankly he did a TERRIBLE job-

Luke (and don't hate me for this) was one of my favs. He needed a family ,but pain can make us behave weird. In the end ,he died for his family ,for the demigods to be saved . In the end only family matters and I truly believe that is better to forgive and to forget

💕

i was just thinking about this but i wanna know y’all’s thoughts on where luke ended up after he died

Fact:

When the rest of the seven showed up to help Pip,Annabeth and Percy at Parthenon,Frank's first instinct was to protect Percy

I swear Percy and Franks relationship is so underrated and that deserves hype🥺

He inspired so many people with his incredible music and completely changed the electronic music scene. RIP Tim Bergling, you will be insanely missed. Rest easy, I love you so much❤️🕯

Jason, Nico, Hazel and Percy are the Super Family of PJO. I said what I said, point blank period.

Athena: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Ares will and will not eat.

Persephone: Grass? Yes!

Athena: Moss? Yes.

Persephone: Leaves? Ohh, yes!

Athena: Shoelaces? Strange, but true.

Persephone: Worms? Sometimes!

Athena: Rocks? Usually no.

Persephone: Twigs? Usually!

Athena: Aphrodite's cooking? Inconclusive!

Apollo: How did you… test this?

Athena: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it.

Apollo: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.

Aphrodite: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

Hermes: Hey, can you teach me to play the trumpet?

Apollo: Why?

Hermes: Because I want to follow Zeus around and annoy him with it.

Dionysus: Technically you don't need to know how to play the trumpet to do that.

Hermes: You're so right-

RIP

Person: Who's the hottest guy in the room?

Leo: *starts to burn*