So...it’s been over a month since I started taking my fitness and health journey a little more seriously. I was on top of it for 3 weeks, but idk...After the 30th of June (which is the last time I stepped foot in the gym), I completely lost the motivation to keep working out. I haven’t even been going on walks either, which was something I started to look forward to and enjoy. Granted, the walk thing could be attributed to the weather. It’s gotten so hot that even at 5am, it’s already 95 degrees or higher. However, with the gym thing?...I’m really disappointed in myself. On top of that, my diet has been awful this week.
My body image has been beyond terrible. Monday was the worst I have felt about myself in a while. Even though I was hanging out with one of my lovely best friends, all I could think about was how my body looked in the dress I was wearing and if people were judging my appearance. I ended up wearing a jacket over the whole thing because I was so self-conscious.
Today, I’ve started to get back on track. The first thing I did this morning was meditate and repeat some of the many affirmations I have written down for myself. I have been lacking in keeping up with this and I plan to be more consistent in the near future. On top of this health and fitness journey, I’ve also been on a spiritual journey, which has also had a lot of ups and downs this past year and is a whole other thing that I will not get into today lol
I also ran some errands that I have been procrasting on doing. I had a salad for lunch (go me lol). I cleaned out my fridge, which I needed to do because I have not been home for a while and a majority of the items in there were expired. Now all is left is to go grocery shopping, which I plan to do tomorrow morning. I’m planning to put my dusty crockpot to use (if the food I make turns out good, I’ll share a picture of it).
Sorry for the long post. Again, this was mostly for me. I really want this blog to be a realistic place I feel free to share my journey, both the positive and negative.
This week was more on the negative side, but that’s okay. Tomorrow is another day :)
TW: mention of calories
Just a brief check in today. No long, venting post this time.
Anyway...today went pretty well. I didn’t make it to the gym like I, originally, had planned. However, I was very mindful with what I ate today. I even managed to incorporate some vegetables and fruit. But, I also made sure to not deprive myself. For instance, after lunch today, I really wanted a cookie, so I had a cookie. AND...I didn’t feel bad about it all. I didn’t immediately head to the gym to work off the calories (which is something I would have done a few years ago).
I’d also like to highlight the fact that I went shopping for clothes this past weekend...and guess what? I didn’t have my usual mental breakdown in any of the fitting rooms I used (can’t wait to report this to my therapist LOL).
Overall, I’m really proud of myself. I know that meeting all of my goals will take longer than I’m used to, as I’m doing it with a healthier mindset this time. But, I know that, in the long run, this will be the best and most sustainable way. :)
Sola (she/her) | 29 | A journey of fitness and self love.
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