I Have Something To Say 

what community is right for you?

hello! i thought this might be a good place to get started for resources. in my experience there are three large communities oriented toward a love of fictional characters, but it’s hard to tell where you might fit in best without more information. some people may fit in all three, and some may be drawn to only one.

the three communities i’m referring to are the selfship, fictoromantic/fictosexual and waifuist communities. they’ve all got their own internal sets of values and community culture. i’ve been involved in all three, so here’s what i’ve learned! this post will be updated with corrections as necessary.

selfshippers comprise a huge amount of those in relationships with fictional characters. the selfship community is very large, with the greatest portion of its presence on tumblr and deviantart. however, you’ll find selfshippers on many social media platforms.

selfship culture is a very nebulous thing because of the size of the selfship community. in general, selfshippers tend to treat their fictional relationships as media ships, and it varies from person to person AND ship to ship how serious any given commitment is. there are a good deal of minors in the community, as well as adults in their early and mid twenties. people older than that seem to be drawn to other communities, but obviously exceptions abound. there aren’t rules against polyamory.

fictoromantic/fictosexual communities are very different. in my experience the fict community is smaller and comprised of more adults, many over 25. fict communities usually treat these affections as an orientation rather than a lifestyle choice, in contrast to the other communities listed here. it seems many terms are shared with the selfship community (such as “fictional other”) but not always other things. ficts tend to be more serious about relationships to fictional characters, but that seriousness still varies from person to person, as there isn’t one accepted relationship model. there aren’t rules against polyamory, but some ficts do take offense to adults being interested in minor-age characters. the fict community is probably the smallest of the three, or at least has a very small tumblr presence.

waifuism is a little like selfship in that multiple people who consider themselves waifuists will inevitably disagree on a great deal. there are rules, and in my time i found rules are a very large part of any waifuist’s community experience, but they vary according to what community you’re in. because waifuism is usually perceived as a branch of anime culture, it tends to be pretty different from selfship OR fict communities. there are nearly no shared terms. attitudes about “3D” people range wildly, but such attitudes are generally a fair amount of discussion. the largest social media presences for waifuism are on reddit and on 4chan type boards. i only have experience with the two largest subreddits. polyamory is hotly debated here, as are many rules. depending on what particular community you’re in, people may be committed to the point of IRL celibacy or simply joking about a favorite character.

there’s certainly a lot going on when it comes to how people express their love and how they form communities. i’ve been deeply involved in these communities for about a year and a half, and i still get things wrong, so feel free to tell me about anything i should add or correct here. thanks for reading, and i hope it’s a helpful post!

Busted myths about fictophilia / schediaphilia

Hi! I’d like to get the word out since I’ve seen lots of wrong assumptions circulating about this. Fictophilia is a romantic and/or sexual orientation which covers exclusive attraction to fictional characters in animation and movies (no, not the actors). It’s not a fetish, disorder, or solely a type of attraction, but an orientation one is born with, just as valid as any other*. It has nothing to do with lusting after those characters sexually as a fan. *There are people who are attracted to other people and fictional characters in that way. In that case, their orientation is whatever they identify with. I’d like to help you understand who we are and what we’re not by responding to the most common statements aimed at us. This has gotten pretty long so I put all the answers under a cut.

Keep reading

PSA:

There is absolutely nothing wrong with going “screw canon!” and changing a thing that canon did that you don’t like in the universe where your s/i exists

This message needs to be shared.

I wish more understood this. For me , I have been this way since I was a small child. For years after I became a teen I hid it from others cause of being made fun of.

I knew I was different when all my peers grew out of it and I remained. And that my feelings actually made my heart hurt.

Now here I am a grown woman, able to be open about it without shame or regret. I’m grateful for that and to know so many who share it with me.

💙💚💛💜

@ the creators of my f/o’s media when they kill them off

I personally believe that as a universe is written or created it comes into existence, and that time is fluid and non-linear and so all universes are always happening in the past, future and present all the same. This is why I have a hard time thinking my "kinself" is any different from me now, because I exist in the past, present and future. AUs and stuff are the same, in that they become a separate world with existing framework, just different. Just offering someone else's take on it. :3

Great perspective, anon! Very interesting.

I aspire to be a woman who loves to wakes up early in the morning and loves what she does for a living everyday. Travels often, spiritually secured, and financially stable.