Have You Ever Had Someone Say To You With Absolute Certainty That You Could Get AIDS From Having Dirt

“How’s it feel to live through another Roaring 20’s?”

—MY SISTER TO OUR GREAT GRANDMOTHER

I CANT BREATHEE

Absolutely killer idea of mine to continue to go into Tumbleweed or whatever the town is called despite the at LEAST 40 black x’s scattered across the town and the four blue dots running around and constant gunfire.

Anyways important side note; I just started the game. I figured the four dots were all just one posse and that the x’s were just a bunch of npc or lawmen. It’s whatever. Not my issue. I’m just here to sell pelts. I figure as long as I don’t loot any of the bodies or start shooting or get in the way they will just let me do my stuff.

But the SECOND I go under the little wooden gate entrance thingy, one of the people went down. REALLY close by. And I get a notif on how to revive people. And I keep walking for a second before I’m like “ah fuck it. Might as well revive him” and I hop off my horse and run like the 3 seconds it took me to get to him and he’s obviously backing up as much as he can downed since some random person just ran up to him but I just revive him and run away back onto my horse. Nothing further. Shooting continues and I see people running around and I sell my pelts staying out of the way and then I’m heading to the general store to buy apples for my horse when I run into one of these little blue dots. And he runs up to me and pulls out a gun and I’m like “oh I can just show him I’m friendly and give a little wave” and in the mere second it took me to get halfway from finding the emotes to getting into mid wave he SHOOTS ME!! The nerve. I die. Anyways I respawn and press charges cause I thought that was a bit uncalled for

Second anyways but I respawn and I return. To Tumbleweed. And as I’m riding over I’m like “wow that was so rude. I can’t believe he did that” Aaannnd here’s where I realize that it’s not one posse. It’s two. Two stars and two little blue dots. And that this whole time since the beginning no npc’s have been running about. I walked into a gun fight. A gun fight between two posses. And I helped the leader of the one(blue star) And the other guy from the other posse(blue dot) shot me. I have made a grave mistake. I realize this and continue on to Tumbleweed with gunshots echoing in the background

After finally getting to Tumbleweed again I FINALLY buy my apples and carrots for my horse and as I’m unhitching my horse I see the one star and dot coming back up and I check rq if those are the guys I accidentally helped in a shootout and it is! They won! Hurray!! And I’m giving my horse some pats when they pass me directly and the star, the one I helped, gives me a(checks notes) hat flick I assume of thanks.

Anyways happy ending

I wanna post something but don’t know what so have my cat Apollo

Update: Apollo swallowed a lego and is getting surgery

me waiting for my writing teachers to realize that the reason I write the same shit every year is because I don’t remember my child hood because of all the trauma that’s been inflicted on me:

The main villain for in my book was just like...

“So here is where all the villainy stuff happens! Here is where the dieseases are made! Here is where they are dried!!”

AND THEN THE NEXT PARAGRAPH WAS???

“And those are my moths...I don’t need them, they just vibin’, you know??”

me when I’m with my friend: loba PLEASE just say thank you??? Damn girl why you gotta be so rude

me when I’m with anyone else: I want loba to FUCKING STEP ON ME

I’m sad that “smug bastard” isn’t a personality trait in sims 4 cats and dogs

If you pass by a cat and they lift their little head up and make a bwur? sound. You woke them up and are now classified as a monster

Guess who’s school just got quarantined!!!

Also, bonus cat for this special occasion