Feartoxicity - ; 𝗞𝗘𝗘𝗣 𝗜𝗧 𝗜𝗡 𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗗 ” -19-

patroclus ever so gently kissing achilles' eyelids while he sleeps— achilles is sometimes awake but pretends he's sleeping just to feel pat's love.

‘The Reconciliation of the Montagues and Capulets over the Dead Bodies of Romeo and Juliet’ by Frederic Leighton, c. 1855.

A Long Way Home

Aonung x Omatikayan!Fem!Reader 

Summary – Leaving your life behind to move to the reefs wasn't your plan, all you really want is a peaceful life with your family, but one of the Metkayina boys keeps staring at you...

Contains: Mentions of death, slow burn (?), Spider is mentioned in a good light (please bear with me), complex parental relationships, heavy development on platonic/family relationships

pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5

Word count: 4k

“This is our home! This is my home!” Neytiri cried, you pulled away from the tent, pursing your lips. You sat back and watched as Tuk peeked under the tent, Neteyam and Lo’ak leaning in further. Kiri looked back at you but didn’t move from her place listening to the conversation.  

You could hear Jake arguing back but you couldn’t make out the words, not that you needed to. As much as it pained you to admit it, Jake was right, the forest wasn’t safe for the Sully’s anymore, they already took your brother, and he knows everything about life here.  

The weight on your chest only became heavier. Before anyone could notice, you stood up and quickly made your way to the edge of the cavern your clan had taken refuge in.  

Spider wasn’t your biological brother, hell he wasn’t even the same species anymore but for a long time it felt like he was the only one you truly had.    

You were almost a year younger than him and born after the humans left earth, your mother was allowed to stay behind on Pandora. Unfortunately, that meant medical supplies were stretched thin and your mother died soon after you were born. Ironically the Omatikaya were celebrating Neteyam’s birth only a few minutes earlier.  

It wasn’t till you got older that Norm and Max noticed how sickly you were, scratches and bruises weren’t a problem on Spider, but for you they stayed and got infected easily. Staying outside after dark when it got cold was too risky, Neteyam and Lo’ak often had to piggyback you to Hell’s Gate because you lost track of time or ran out of stamina.   

Everything changed when you turned 6, after a strenuous forest exploration and a bad injury you ended up bed ridden for days on the verge of death. Having been worrying about an event like this happening for almost all your life, Norm and Max had quietly prepared an Avatar body for you years ago in hopes the Omatikaya would accept another consciousness transfer.  

Spider didn’t leave your side for weeks after that, he fussed over everything you did and insisted Neteyam or Kiri were around when traveling through the woods. You could tell that you now being Na’vi bothered him, you no longer had common ground, you were once alone together but you could tell he now just felt alone.  

Neteyam also became overly protective after that, he seemed to be able to read your mind and emotions. Jake and Neytiri kept a close eye on you, now being Na’vi Neytiri accepted you into their family.  

But now Spider was gone, he was taken by the humans and Jake wants to leave.   

You called for your Ikran, Tsyía, it was getting late but you needed to clear your head. You weaved between the trees, slowing down once you made it past the thick of forest, you sat up and breathed in the air.   

If Jake and Neytiri decided to leave this would be the last time you’d see the forest, explore the trees, race Neteyam and Lo’ak through Hallelujah mountains, take Tuk far above the tops of trees and to the stone pillars. Your entire life was this forest.  

The wind blowing your hair always calmed you down, the way the sun shone on the rocks was your favorite site. You kept your hold on the saddle, but you let yourself sit back and enjoy the air, your other arm coming up and back with the wind. You closed your eyes. This was peace.   

Your Ikran cried, alerting you that you were approaching the human camps, quickly you started ascending higher and higher before dropping. A trick you never did around Neteyam or Lo’ak knowing how their individual reactions would cause Jake and Neytiri to get word of it.  

Freefalling for a few seconds, further and further before you grabbed on tight to the satchel and Tsyía leveled out just above the trees. You flew around for a while, memorizing your home before heading back.  

You didn’t make much of a commotion when you came back but Tuk immediately an over and held onto your leg. 

“Y/n you’re coming with us, right?!” She begged, you were taken a back and looked up to Neteyam and Kiri who were walking up to you. 

“Mom and dad were discussing what they’d do if you wanted to stay behind” Neteyam explained, he looked nervous himself. 

You smiled and bent down closer to Tuk, “Of course I'm coming with you” you glanced back up to Kiri and Neteyam. After you were able to soothe Tuk you noted how late it was and insisted she go to bed, Kiri followed her after simply placing a hand on your shoulder and telling you she was glad. It wasn’t much but you knew it meant a lot coming from Kiri. 

You and Neteyam shared a look before you moved to sit next to the cave opening, Neteyam sitting next to you, your head falling on his shoulder. 

“What made you change your mind?” he asked after a moment of silence. You frowned. “My mind was never made up, I just made my decision”  

“I wonder what the ocean looks like” you thought out loud, fatigue growing. Neteyam chuckled “Was that your deciding factor?” 

You frowned again, bickering with him about your poorly timed statements. Neteyam seemed satisfied with this even if it didn’t answer his question, talking about what it would be like to live on the reefs. 

You don’t remember falling asleep, but you woke up cuddled with everyone else back in the tent. 

-  

By the time the reefs came into view you were exhausted, and so was Tsyía, you all came to a landing on the shore edge. It was unnerving with the crowd that surrounded you all, Tuk hid behind Neytiri’s leg, but you picked her up and cradled her in your arms when she looked back at you nervously.  

Kiri and Lo’ak both moved so you’d all be closer together when who you assumed to be the Olo'eyktan and Tsahìk parted through the crowd. Your father explained how he sought safe refuge for his family, but you watched as Lo’ak struggled to tear his eyes away from a girl who rose from the water.  

Your attention was drawn back to the situation when a couple of boys circled you and your siblings, grabbing at your brothers’ tail.  

“Is this supposed to be a tail?”  

“How will they swim?”  

You held Tuk closer and watched as Lo’ak barely held himself together. You looked over your shoulder and glared at one of the boys who was seemingly going to poke at you too, you held his gaze for a moment, he lost his smirk, and simply stared at you. He looked you up and down and you could feel the urge to curl in on yourself, whether that be from the intensity of his gaze or not knowing what he was thinking.  

Before he could say anything, the girl from before scolded the two boys before taking her place next to the Olo'eyktan. She must be his daughter.  The two boys backed down as your father continued speaking, the boy you stared at taking his place on the other side of the Olo'eyktan. Oh great.  

You tried to not be bothered when they pointed out the odd number of fingers you and your sibling possessed. You mostly focused on soothing Tuk until the Olo'eyktan, whom you learned was named Tonowari, announced that your family was welcome and his children, Ao’nung and Tsireya would teach you all how to adapt to the Metkayina way. The boy protested but shut up when his father shut him down, he locked eyes with you, an indescribable look on his face.  

Ao’nung huh?  

Tsireya showed you all the way to your Marui pod, Tuk practically jumped out of your arms to jump across the pathway. 

You observed your surroundings as you walked, people casting out fishing nets, children swimming under the walkways and jumping off the docks, the animals swimming around peacefully and interacting with the people there. Everything was so different than what you were used to, but an excitement you hadn’t expected spurred into your body. You had adapted to the Na’vi way once before, you could do it again.  

Tsireya officially introduced herself, and you didn’t miss how she kept her eyes trained on Lo’ak most of the time. 

“I am Neteyam, and this is my twin Y/n-” You internally rolled your eyes at how he insists on that. “This is our youngest sister Tuk” he continued. He gestured to Lo’ak and Kiri. Kiri introducing herself warmly and Lo’ak mumbling sheepishly.   

Tsireya smiled at Lo’ak then to everyone else, after you settled down in the hut, she guided you all towards the edge of the docks to start your first swimming lesson. She and Ao’nung dove into the water with Rotxo, Neteyam and Lo’ak following them. You and Kiri shared a look before Tuk jumped in, then finally you and Kiri.  

Being in the water was strange at first but you were able to familiarize yourself fairly quickly, Kiri had no trouble holding her breath while the others seemed to struggle more.   

Your siblings swam after Tsireya and her brother, Kiri, staying behind to admire the plants and animals, getting lost in it all.   

You followed the group but took more time getting close to the plants and watching the fish swim by. Soon you had to swim up for air, you breached the surface just as Neteyam and Lo’ak did, taking in breaths of air.  

“It's so beautiful here” You grinned. Neteyam and Lo’ak looked at each other then back to you, affirming their agreement.  

Ao’nung and Tsireya re-surfaced in front of you guys, you took a deep breath before going under again, making your way back to be mesmerized by the scenery, after a second ao’nung appeared infront of you, he started to sign something, but you couldn’t understand so you both swam up to speak.  

“What are you doing? Your brothers are learning to breathe right” he questioned as if saying ‘why aren’t you too?’ 

You simply glanced back down and shrugged, you looked him in the eye “the reef is beautiful” you smiled and dove back down before he could say anything else  

The feeling of being fully submerged in the water was what you loved, the fish that swam around you and the light reflecting off the coral.  

Before long, Neteyam insisted we all return to the pod, Jake and Neytiri sat on the floor and waited for everyone to settle down to start dinner.   

The pod wasn’t like the hammocks you grew up on, but the sloshing of water and arms cuddled around you comforted you to sleep.  

-  

You were adjusting well; your breathing was getting better, and you were picking up their underwater language quickly. Ao’nung and his friends teased your siblings a lot which upset you,but you often found him drifting near you, showing up in the same part of the reef you were exploring.  

He started telling you about the different plants and animals, guiding you to the best parts for that time of day but he always found soemthing to make fun of, pulling at your tail or how clumsy you were in the water. 

When it came time to tame the ilu and he called for them, you found yourself intrigued in the noises he made but once there was one infront of you that was all you wanted to focus on.  

You felt his eyes on you, your brothers were learning to mount their ilu, you just stroked the one in front of you, smiling as you took in the animal, their fins and their beauty.  

“-Y/n” Tsireya’s voice pulled you out of your trance, you looked up to see them looking at you, Neteyam and Lo’ak already on their ilu’s back. “Are you not going to get on?” she asked. 

You looked down, “I uh… I wasn’t paying attention, I’m sorry” your cheeks burned at the embarrassment. Tsireya giggled and asked Ao’nung to show you how to do it again. 

Ao’nung swam over to you begrudgingly, you mounted your ilu and he guided your hands to the correct positions. 

“Now body position is very important,” He started to explain. “If you don’t have it right you could go too slow or fall off.” You listened intently, but when he touched your leg or hand for the demonstration, you couldn’t help but avert your eyes. The way his voice lowered when asked if you were listening, almost demanding you to look at him, made you freeze. God he’s annoying  

 Your brother went first, flying off almost immediately, driving Ao’nung’s point home. You clenched your jaw as to not say anything when they made fun of your brothers when their attempts failed. 

You moved forward to try, Rotxo saying something along the lines of ‘this should be good’. 

You focused as your ilu dove under water, keeping a tight grip and correcting your positions accordingly. It was overwhelming moving so fast in the water, but after a second it started to feel familiar. Admittedly you didn’t have complete control, but no one criticized you when you came back, a smug look on your face and still on your ilu. Ao’nung smirking, raising his chin in a ‘told you so’ way 

- 

When you heard your sister yelling you wasted no time running over to the source of the commotion, you and Neteyam arriving at the same time. Ao’nung and his friends were picking at Lo’ak, but Neteyam broke it up, telling the boys to back off. You stood behind him closer to Kiri, Ao’nung’s glances towards you not going unnoticed.  

“From now on I need you to respect my sister.” Neteyam pointed to Kiri, not taking his eyes off Ao’nung, He nodded, putting his hands up amused, Neteyam turned around, gathering Lo’ak and you to all leave.  

“they're freaks... A whole family of them” Now that pissed you off, you were about to retort when Lo’ak beat you too it.  

You knew something was up when he started showing off his hand, then suddenly Lo’ak was punching Ao’nung left and right. “It’s called a punch bitch.”  

Ah there it is  

The boy immediately tackled Lo’ak, punching him and pulling at his tail, you watched Neteyam rub the back of his head before jumping into the fight.  

You and Kiri shared a look, you smirked and watched her grimace before you ran in, tackling Ao’nung off Neteyam. You two rolled in the sand, you landing on top and throwing a few punches in his face before pulling at his ears.  

“You fight like a girl!” he yelled, pushing you off him and grabbing your tail. You scrambled up and threw yourself backwards at him knocking you both to the ground again. Even though your hip was now throbbing, you turned yourself on top of him, straddling his back.  

“Good!” You grabbed him by his hair and pushed his face into the sand, “Now leave my fam-” you were cut off when he pushed up and you fell off him, your head slamming against the sand, you took the chance to kick him in the face as he stood up. He recoiled but grabbed hold of your ankle.  

“This is stupid” you heard Kiri yell.  

Ao’nung pulled you forward by the leg, instinctively you kicked his shin causing him to fall. He caught himself just before he slammed into you, his hand holding onto your ankle, moved to now holding the skin between your thigh and hip. Your breath hitched 

You didn’t realize your eyes were closed until you opened them and realized how close Ao’nung was, you stared at each other for a moment before Neteyam grabbed Ao’nung by the hair and pulled him off you, Roxto rushing into drag you by your tail. 

You don’t know who broke the fight up but before you knew it Jake had come to collect you all and dragged you back to the pod.  

“What did I tell you guys?!” Jake yelled.  

“It was my fault” Neteyam started but Jake cut him off. “No, it’s not, you need to stop taking the blame for your brother”  

“It was me” You interjected, now this Lo’ak jumped at.  

“No it wasn’t! They were picking on Kiri and called us freaks! I was defending my sister.” Lo’ak confessed, he never liked Neteyam taking the blame but after the incident, he was always quick to coddle or protect you.  

Jake sighed, “You can’t be starting fights, we can’t afford to cause more trouble here. Now go apologize” Lo’ak tried to object but Jake shut him down. Lo’ak stormed out, but just as you and Neteyam were about to leave Jake spoke up. “What did the other guys look like?”  

“Worse”  

Jake nodded “Good”  

A smile crept onto Neteyam’s face “A lot worse”  

“Get out of here” he then turned to you  

“Not worse but he didn’t get a punch in...” You muttered. He smiled and tussled your hair, nudging you out of the pod in the process.  

-  

Ao’nung didn’t know what to think, the forest freaks were nothing but a nuisance to him, but atleast he could tolerate you. Why? He couldn’t tell you. 

From the beginning he couldn’t quite keep his eyes off you, the way you swam and seemingly became one with the flora was mesmerizing. 

It was easy to ignore it, but you were around so much he thought he’d show you around the reef. Though a few times he purposely took you to places he knew would be difficult for you, just to get a laugh in, but you didn’t have to know that. 

But then the breathing lesson came, even though you were doing well, his sister insisted that he coach you. He couldn’t even focus on your breathing; you looked so Intune and at peace when you closed your eyes. He felt like his palms were on fire, the contact with your skin was all he could think about  

Even when your brothers failed miserably at taming the ilu you were still at the forefront of his mind. His skin felt on fire every time he touched you. The way you refused to look at him when he was teaching you felt disrespectful? 

He didn’t even try to hide how he was staring at your face, thankfully you couldn’t see. He found himself lagging behind, watching you from afar, you and Kiri bonding with nature in a way he didn’t think was possible for forest people.  

None of that stopped him from picking fights with your siblings though.  

He honestly didn’t expect you to get involved, it was when you tackled him that he lost his guard, you were a good fighter too. He didn’t think much about it until he was right in your face, his hand holding just above your thigh, he saw every detail of your face and he just wanted to memorize it in that moment.   

He didn’t like this but brushed it off quickly, you were new, and he was curious about you. Once he spent more time around you, he’d lose interest.  He was sure of it. 

-  

You sat on top of one of the giant roots the village hung from weaving thread. You and Neteyam’s birthday was coming up and though it would be a small celebration, you still wanted to give him a good gift, an important human tradition apparently.  

You sensed him before you saw him, but you made no effort to acknowledge him just yet. His presence should have put you on edge but oddly enough, it didn’t.  

“You’re a good fighter.” He finally said, Ao’nung sat behind you on a different root.  

“I thought I ‘fought like a girl’” You retorted, he chuckled  

“I thought that was a good thing” he stood up and jumped over to the root you were on and sat in front of you. After a moment, he leaned in real close to your face and spoke, “What are you making?” He seemed curious but there was still that pompous attitude in his voice.  

You thought for a moment, debating whether to answer his question. “It’s a Anurai for Neteyam” you made eye contact with him. “Our birthday is coming us soon and I suppose with all this change it would be nice”   

When he didn’t answer you glanced up and saw that he was watching you weave the necklace, a small smile creeped onto your lips before you realized he was probably watching your hands  

“They’re freaks. Not true Na’vi”  

You scrunched your hands and necklace together before abruptly standing up, without a word you hopped down the root and walked towards the village, your pace only growing faster when you heard him call out to you.  

As you approached your Marui pod you hid the necklace behind your back in case Neteyam or Tuk were inside, Tuk wasn’t good at keeping a secret.  

You peaked inside and only saw Neytiri, you smiled and sat down next to her, she glanced over and asked about the necklace.  

“It's for Neteyam. Our birthday is coming up.” You explained almost in a whisper, you loved Neytiri, she was your mother, but you still felt like you couldn’t breathe around her sometimes.   

She guided your hands closer to her so she could get a better look, she examined it thoroughly, you held your breath. “It is beautiful Y/n, you are a loving sister” she stated gazing at you fondly.  

You couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face, you scooted yourself closer to her as you continued to weave, wishing a little that she was watching. Her presence was demanding, but over time that grew to be a source of comfort for you, your need to please her only growing when she started to accept you into the family. 

After a while you could hear Tuk calling for you outside the pod, you relented and hid the necklack in your bag. Smiling to Neytiri before you left you made your way to the edge of the dock, Tuk sat Infront of Kiri on her ilu, she started telling you about all the caverns Tsireya showed her. You sat on the edge of the dock listening and splashing your feet in the water.  

Neteyam came up on his ilu, insisting you get in, Tuk quickly reiterating the sentiment. Before you can get in, Kiri looks around and asks where Lo’ak was  

“Probably apologizing to Ao’nung or following Tsireya around” Neteyam teased 

You smirked “Well I just saw Ao’nung so...” it had been obvious to everyone that Lo’ak was smitten with the Olo'eyktan’s daughter, you and your other siblings often poked fun at him for it, especially after she noted that his heart was beating fast while her hands were on his chest.  

“I was just with Tsireya though...” Kiri commented, Tuk testifying the same.  

You and Neteyam shared a look, he turned around and swam off with his ilu.  

-  

You comforted Tuk in the pod while she whined about wanting to go look for Lo’ak, you wanted to too, but you had to stay here, even when Kiri joined you in the pod you knew you'd be no help in the search. When Tuk got more restless you and Kiri took her into the water and tried to entertain her 

When you heard he was back, you jumped on your ilu and followed the direction the people on the walkway went. When you arrived, you saw Lo’ak and Ao’nung talking, you didn’t care about what they were saying, you just rode up and jumped onto the docks.  

“Lo’ak are you ok?” You placed a hand on his shoulder, looking him up and down before placing one on his face. most of the crowd had dispersed by now, leaving only you, Lo’ak, and Ao’nung.  

“I’m fine sis” you could tell he was holding back. You scrunched your eyebrows in worry. “I just had a little trouble out at sea...” he confessed  

“A little bit of trouble?!” You kept your voice down but the panic was still evident, you knew that what Lo’ak says is a ‘little trouble’ is not in fact little.  

He places his hand on your shoulder, “Really sis. I’m fine.” He pulls you in for a hug, you nod and pull back. Before you can leave for the pod, you hear Ao’nung say your name.  

His expression is hard to understand, a mix of guilt and embarrassment? You couldn’t place it.   

All you do is turn your head and quickly walk away. You ignore the calls of your name. 

Even that night when you all snuck off to a more secluded area to hear what happened to Lo’ak you ignored him, well you didn’t talk to him, you definitely glared more than necessary when Lo’ak talked about almost being killed by the Akula. You listened to Ao’nung as he spoke about the Tulkan but you never gave him more than a deadpan. 

Befriending a deadly and killer Tulkan. Definitely seemed like something your brother would do. 

“How long are you going to ignore him?” Lo’ak asked, clearly amused by the not-so-subtle distaste you showed for Ao’nung the while night. You rolled your eyes. 

“He was staring at you a lot” Neteyam tartly pointed out.  

“I was glaring at him a lot” you suggested 

- 

You ignored Ao’nung all morning, which for some reason made him follow you around even more. Instead of just being around, he was always right next to you or behind you. Once he realized you weren’t going to even listen to him, he just trailed behind.  

This continued to the next day and eventually he got the hint and stopped bothering you. 

“You know he apologized right?” Lo’ak asked while you were tending to your ilu. 

“Yes.” you answered. “Doesn’t mean I want to talk to him; he got that through his thick skull eventually” 

Kiri chucked, “It also helps that he and Neteyam caught on to his ogling and kept attempting to intimidate him” she mused, gesturing to Lo’ak. 

“It’s weird! I don’t like it, Y/n is my sister” he defended, Kiri rolled her eyes as she retorted. “And Tsireya is his, by now you should be pummeled in the sand” 

You ignore their bickering and swim to a more peaceful location on your ilu. You sat on your knees on the rock, your ilu’s head resting in your lap as you stroked her head and watched the scenery. 

You were too caught up in the way the lowering sun reflected on the water to sense someone coming up behind you, suddenly you were lifted into the air and dropped slightly as they wrapped their arms around your waist, keeping you off the ground. 

You screamed in surprise, ready to elbow the face of the person behind you. 

“Got ya!” Ao’nung stepped back tightening his hold on you. 

Relief washed over you before frustration took over. “Ao’nung let me go!” you yelled, adrenaline still rushing through you. 

“No way, this is the only way I can get you to listen to me” he exclaimed, you could hear the smirk in his voice. 

“Let me down.” you demanded. 

“Only when you promise to hear me out” You could feel the smugness radiating from him, huffing you relented. Satisfied, he let you down but held onto your forearm when you turned around. 

You glared at him to express your displeasure but he only smirked. “Listen, I’m sorry about what I did to your brother” his voice was genuine “But I realize it was wrong, I want to make it up to you.” 

You raised an eyebrow. “Shouldn’t Lo’ak be the one getting compensated” 

He thought, smiling “He gets a free punch on me anytime he wants” raising his eyebrows, asking if that was satisfactory. 

You rolled your eyes. He leaned in closer, “I want to make it up to you for making you so distressed, and for making you uncomfortable up on the roots the other day.” he elaborated. 

Oh, you didn’t think he’d assume he was the problem when you walked away. Sheepishly you nodded. 

“Ok” he smiled. “Meet me here an hour past sunset” and with that he walked backwards, keeping his eyes trained on you before mounting his ilu and swimming away. 

Biting your lip, you thought for a moment about whether this would be a good idea, you glanced around and got onto your ilu, swimming back to your pod. 

ᴄᴀᴛᴡᴏᴍᴀɴ

DEALER!ELLIE X READER - CATWOMAN. [COLLEGE/UNIVERSITY AU].

WORD COUNT - 3,282.

RATING - 18+. [use of alcohol, use of marijuana, oral sex reader!receiving].

SUMMARY - smitten with a woman she’s never seen before, ellie is willing to give free weed to the femme fatale with nothing in return, but you too stubborn to leave ellie empty handed, you come up with an idea both you and ellie are attune about.

if this reaches more than 75 notes maybe i'll do a part 2?? feedback, liking and reblogging would be appreciated!

if you want to join a the last of us discord/joel miller discord here you go! 𓆩♡𓆪

Ellie had wished she had been born different, she had silently requested she wasn’t as easily obsessed as she was during this current life; it was Halloween and Dina and Jesse had dragged Ellie to a frat party after numerous of pleads for Ellie to get off her ass and celebrate with them. Ellie hated Halloween, she never told anyone why but she despised it, she had only accepted the invitation because she did not want to hear Dina complain any longer.

Currently, Ellie had backed herself up to one of the corners of the walls, she had her hand around one of the red cups that was offered to her the moment she entered the area. She had also been offered much booze, and she didn’t deny any of them, anything to get herself out of the grumpy mood was accepted. Moreover, aside from the beverages she had downed herself with, your appearance had to take the cake, you had strutted into the party with fierce confidence, the Cat Woman outfit you had worn had caused your provocative display to be even more appealing and arousing.

Ellie had noticed you had worn the Cat Woman outfit from the newest Batman movie, Ellie had watched your every single move, she was sweetly captivated by your allure and figure, she had observed that others had recognised the risqué attitude and appearance you had and it had commenced people to immediately attempt to offer you drinks, Ellie had found it funny with the way people had drooled and surrounded you. Yet, it had made her curious, she had never seen you before, and if she had seen you prior to this event, she would’ve indubitably remembered it.

Ellie had presently turned to look at her best friend, Dina who had currently been talking to one of the people in the party, but the moment Ellie had nudged her, she twisted her gaze towards Ellie, “Dina, who is she?”

Dina had then curved to observe who Ellie was talking about, the second Dina had recognised who her auburn haired friend was implying of, both of her eyebrows had quickly jerked upwards. “That’s [Y/N] du Armani,” Dina casually replied, “she’s a fashion student and she’s the daughter of the top sponsor of the University, she’s like crazy rich.”

“How comes I’ve never seen her before?” Ellie suspiciously inquired, Ellie had never even heard of you and if you had been the daughter of the top sponsor of the University, she would’ve thought she would’ve heard of your name by now.

Dina creepily smiled at Ellie’s question, she could easily tell that Ellie was intrigued by you, and she would’ve encouraged Ellie to come up to you, but she had heard things about you that had made Dina unsure if she’d want to have her friend smitten by you.

“I’ve been told most of the time that she stays in her dorm if she’s not in class, but other than that, Ellie, the girl’s a player, if you don’t want your feelings hurt don’t do anything with her.”

Perceptive to Dina’s information, Ellie gently beckoned her head, considerate of Dina’s short warning. The girl had then proceeded to drag her boyfriend to the dance floor the moment one of her favourite songs had blasted through the speakers; alone, Ellie lightly huffed through her lips and looked at her almost empty cup, she had thought to get a refill but she hadn’t been bothered to push herself off the wall and push through bodies that had pressed against each other.

“Are you the dealer?”

Shit, Ellie didn’t even see you making your way towards her, her eyes were wide and the grip around her cup had stiffened, the moment Ellie had recognised, that you had been talking to her she had blinked a couple of times, embarrassed that you had caught her in a daze motion.

You had laughed at her taken aback stance, it had seemed like Ellie had attempted to look behind her to make sure you were conversing with her, but her green eyes had just met with the wall that aided her balance. “Well, there’s no one behind you,” you lightly joked.

Ellie turned to face you again, she had seemed less surprised as she had tried to make herself seem less like a fool. “How do you know I deal? Are you the police?”

In faux let-down, you had looked down at your feet. “Maybe you’re not the dealer,” you said in error, yet, it had seemed like Ellie had taken your disappointment seriously which had caused her to widen her eyes.

“Oh, I do deal but I don’t have anything on me right now, shit, I’m sorry.”

You had lifted your face to face her, there was a small pout on your face but it was detectable. Your pout was dainty and pretty and it had pushed Ellie to want to help you with your weed problem, “that’s fine, I’ll look for someone else.”

“No, we can go back to my accommodation,” Ellie countered, she had hidden much of her stash there and had barely been detected for some reason, but she did not want to jinx anything and thank God that she hadn’t been exposed.

“Okay,” you had simply muttered, “I found the party boring anyways,” you hadn’t been in the party for more than thirty minutes, but you had just wanted people to see your erotic outfit you had made yourself. You had followed Ellie out of the frat party, she was a couple of steps ahead of you but had consistently checked if you were still behind her. “How comes you haven’t dressed up for Halloween?” Aside from her not wearing any costumes, you had observed that she had looked like a lumberjack.

“I hate Halloween,” Ellie bluntly answered, she hadn’t told anyone why she disliked the Holiday, the only people who knew the reason for her distaste of the event was her family, it wasn’t admittedly a topic she liked to converse about.

You had examined her up and down, humoured that she had hated Halloween but attended a Halloween party. “Then how comes you were at the frat party?”

“Because my friends forced me to come.”

“How would your friends feel when they learn that you left them to give me weed?” You curiously inquired, if she had seen the way your eyes had glistened, she would’ve thought you had a commodity sneaking up your sleeve, but it had actually lauded you that she was willing to take you to her accommodation, mayhap it was because she would be receiving money as an outcome.

Ellie had snickered at your comment and gently waved her hand as a short response. “They’d get over it.”

The entire walk towards her accommodation had been brimmed with the two of you endlessly conversing with each other, you hadn’t thought that you would be engrossed enough to have a long conversation with her. Though, Ellie had actually been an enticing person, she had informed you that she does Music but likes to do Art as a hobby along with reading comics, you had found it cute with the way she spoke about planets and how sometimes her words slurred due to the amount of alcohol she had consumed.

The both of you had eventually ended up at her accommodation, the walk was quite long but Ellie had used Jessie’s car to come to the frat party so there was no way he would’ve allowed Ellie to use his car for her business, and she did not want Dina to see that she had fell into the traps of the Cat Woman who stole everyone’s attention the minute she walked in.

The auburn-haired girl had checked if her roommate was in, fortunately the coast was clear, it wasn’t like Ellie was ashamed to bring you in, her roommate was nosy and loved to gossip. If she saw you behind Ellie she would’ve undeniably typed away. On the other hand, Ellie had been surprised that her roommate hadn’t snitched on Ellie about her weed business, perhaps it was because Ellie was sort of her dealer; howbeit, Ellie had assisted you to the shared sofa before she directed herself to where she kept her stash and decided to pre-roll you at least five blunts. You had been grateful for it, surprised even, people had pre-rolled you weed before but not five.

“Ellie, if I’ve known you longer, I would’ve thought you had a crush on me because of this,” you comically asserted while you had felt the dip of Ellie’s weight press beside you.

“Anything for the pretty lady,” she jokingly replied.

“Wanna smoke with me?” You offered, you had thought it would have been lame to end the night with the two of you not smoking anything together, moreover, the both of you had left the frat party because you had mutually found it disinteresting, the least you could do together is have a good time.

She had been quick to take out a lighter, and during her action you had pulled off the Cat Woman mask that had covered half of your face, as a consequence, the moment Ellie’s eyes had rebounded to you, she had felt her heart attempt leapt out of her chest, she had felt her throat close and her cheeks start to heat up, you were even more sublime than she had thought you would’ve been and it made her nervous.

“Have you ever been caught?” You asked and it took Ellie a few seconds to regain her conscious.

She had begun to hate the fact that you had briskly made her feel this way, because she knew what it would lead to. “Not yet,” she awkwardly replied which had inferred you to breathily laugh at her answer, she had then gestured you to pass one of the pre-rolled blunts for her to light and silently you had obeyed her small task.

“I’ve heard that your family sponsors the Uni,” Ellie stated while she had passed the blunt to you, she had looked at you, impertinent to your background.

It had seemed like the strength of the alcohol had slowly died down in her system, she had appeared more serious and examining, her green eyes clear of prying intent. You had dramatically sighed before you had huffed one pull, people had usually asked you about your family and from time to time you’d get annoyed by it, though, during this circumstance you couldn’t be agitated, this was someone who pre-rolled you weed, the least you could do was speak about your family.

“Yeah, du Armani,” you kindly answered.

“How comes I’ve never seen you before?”

Ellie had been greedy for information, even though she had gotten the information from Dina, she had wanted an answer from the actual woman herself. “I just didn’t want to,” you hastily shrugged, you had then passed the zoot to the freckled face girl who had patiently waited for her turn, before you had given the roll to her, she had watched every movement of yours, her eyes intrusive and enamoured, you had turned to look at her while the both of her lips covered the piece, “why ask?” You inquired.

“I don’t know,” Ellie shrugged, she could feel her ears heat up whilst her eyes trailed to her hand that had held the weed, timid to look at you in the eyes once more. She could see through her peripheral that you had widely smiled at her shy state.

“You haven’t told me your name,” Ellie muttered in hopes to get the apprehensive circumstance off her.

“[Y/N].”

You had then sat up during the moment Ellie had redirected the blunt towards you, you could tell that she had wanted to inform you of her name, but you had, as of now been knowledgeable of it. “I know who you are,” you cut off, your eyes were slowly hazed, although, you had remembered that you still had to pay for her services. “How much for the weed?”

Silent, Ellie had contemplated about the prices, she had carried her face to view the ceiling and blew a soft smoke from her lips. You had smiled at her little action and smoothly giggled, content that she was able to make you briefly laugh, with her head rested against the face of the sofa, she had turned to face you. “It’ll be free this time.”

“No!” You loudly gasped, taken aback you had slapped her shoulder, ready to deny her free price once more if she had offered it again.

Ellie quickly sat up, just as dismayed as you. “You’re denying free weed?” She loudly exclaimed and you briskly nodded your head, within this scenario you had viewed Ellie as a mad woman, chiefly due to the fact that she knew you were a rich woman, and most dealers you went to would usually take advantage of that.

“I have to at least do something,” you stubbornly counteracted but Ellie adamantly shook her head, her decision final.

You had pulled back, both hands on your lap briefly upset that Ellie’s services were free, you didn’t want to make it seem like you were taking advantage of her, still, it was her that offered the free prices. Regardless, an idea struck your mind, you had felt a light bulb glow above your head and Ellie could tell you had been up to something, an impish idea running through your mind, giggly, you had pushed your bottom lips behind your lips ere you pressed your lips against Ellie’s ear.

It might’ve been the alcohol and the herbal influence, but accompanying Ellie in her accommodation, alone, had stirred erotic feelings in you. “How about I let you eat me out?”

Surprised, Ellie looked at you, the nerve and audacity you had, her pleasuring you for exchange for her giving you free weed? Your boldness was striking and it was moving for her, “do you usually ask that for people who give you free stuff?” Ellie brazenly challenged.

“No, only the pretty ones,” you mockingly countered.

Smitten, Ellie quickly gave into your proposal, her eyes vulgar, already randy for your taste, pleased, you had pulled yourself closer to her and clasped your lips against hers, her hands fast and eager to take off your Cat Woman outfit, you two had quickly transformed into keen rabbits, your tongues petting each other and lips swelling due to each other’s pressure, you had easily moaned into her mouth while her hands had rubbed over your breast after she hastily unclasped your bra, you had aided the girl to peel off the rest of your costume which had left you to only be in your underwear.

Ellie had then pulled away to view your body, enticed she had placed her hands against the side of your upper waist, her green coloured orbs had examined the beauty spots, the small freckles and the tattoos that had been embedded on your skin, “your body is so fucking perfect,” she lustfully whispered just before she had pressed her lips against your mouth, taking you in again you had moaned while you had wrapped your arms around her and allowed the auburn haired girl to rest you against the sofa.

Her fingers had quickly slid into the inside of your underwear, eager to slide them off your legs, the moment her eyes were set on the divine grail, she commenced to press her lips against the inside of your thighs, the scent of your tangy heat had aroused her, but she had wanted to keep herself tolerant, she had become lenient and restrictive to touch herself as she had wanted all her focus to be on her devouring you.

Hungry, her lips had lapped around your heat, her tongue moving in circles around your nub, her short nails dug into the skin of your thighs holding you into a tight and fixed position. You had moaned, your head had rested flat against the sofa and all you could see was the light that had shone above you, your eyes blurred while Ellie had occupied herself with consistently licking your pearl and sucking it till your body had twitched and ached.

“Fuck,” she murmured, her mouth full with your flesh ere her tongue had attacked your cunt, her fingers from her right hand sneakily made their way up to your pussy, motivated to rub against your clitoris and charge you into a numb and blissed circumstance. Your hands had reached to her hair, eager for the girl to quicken the pace, you had commenced to rub your cunt against her frame, randy and aroused, you had begun to wail in pleasure the moment she had fell into your desires.

Her fingers that had curled and twisted inside you were quick were keen to rub against your lump, Ellie’s eyes that had been focused on your heat had rolled up to view how gratified and content you were. Moaning her name and rubbing your nectar against her face, Ellie’s tongue, long and starved continued to flick against your clit, “you taste so good,” she softly whined, hastily obsessed with the taste of your jolt and relish, she had enthusiastically gathered your cum the moment you had loudly moaned and climaxed in her opening, Ellie had gasped against your skin, ardent to have more of you.

“I need more,” Ellie fervently moaned, her eyes now shut as she began to hump the sofa, her mind had disappeared to the erotic plane that had opened up to her, and she felt like she could cum with just having your taste in her mouth, having you moan her name and rubbing your pussy against her lips was enough to send Ellie into a frenzy.

“Oh God!” You whined, your hand had pressed against Ellie’s head, motivated to push her off but she had been too dominated with the taste of your cunt that she had been willing to send you into another orgasmic burst, “Oh God! Oh G—”

“Oh God?!”

Abruptly, the two of you had quickly pulled away from each other, you were quick to cover your naked body with your hands while Ellie’s roommate, Doris, had shortly covered her eyes with her hand. Embarrassed, you had hastily pulled your underwear and bra back on, your cheeks flustered during the moment you slid on your Cat Suit.

“Shit!” Ellie shortly cussed, she had wiped your ambrosia off her lips, flustered and disconcerted, Ellie had stood to her feet as she had watched you foolishly attempt to put on your clothes. “I’m so sorry,” Ellie abashedly apologised to Doris who had slowly recognised the femme fatale that had sat on the shared couch.

Her mouth slowly parted while Ellie scratched the back of her head, flustered she had known that there would be much apologies that had to be delivered to Doris as she had been caught eating out a student on a couch Doris had also used aside from Ellie. Howbeit, that was the last thing that was in Doris’ mind, her priority was in this case was that fucking [Y/N] du Armani was being eaten out by her roommate.

During the scenario, you hadn’t said much, you were focused on leaving the property so much that you had forgotten your mask on Ellie’s and Doris’ sofa, you had found the situation quite funny but you were still contrite and chagrined that you quickly turned to look at Ellie before you had left the accommodation with the see-through bag filled with pre-rolled weed she had made for you before the disaster.

song[s] that fit this song ⬎

⟶ shakira - she wolf.

if you want to join a the last of us discord/joel miller discord here you go! 𓆩♡𓆪

masterlist

♆

Norman Reedus 

𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐍 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒

⠀◦ content warings: afab!reader, as title states these are literally nsfw links to porn, MDNI

⠀◦ a/n: i have yet to see anyone do this for ellie and i'm horny so here is some twitter porn that reminds me of ellie, don't open these in public.

ellie playing with your pussy and grinding against you as she leaves wet kisses on your lips and neck

ellie teasing your clit with a vibrator, bringing you multiple orgasms and overstimulating you

ellie fucking you with a dildo, watching as your pussy clenches around it

ellie groping you ass and guiding you as you sit on top of her and rub your pussy against hers

she fucks you with a strap, missionary

ellie eating you out, being slow and sensual

ellie pleasing you with her hand down your panties

riding ellie's strap, jumping on it as it pumps in and out of you

ellie rubbing your clit and fingering you while you lay between her thighs

more strap riding.. could be you or her on top, whichever way you please.

you and ellie helping each other relax by grinding your cunts together

bonus picture of you two that she'd look at every time she was having dirty thoughts about you

my obsession with Norman Reedus is unhealthy. 

Lamia,  Herbert James Draper

I WILL NEVER GET OVER THIS LOOK. SLEEPY GF ELLIE.

here with you ; ellie williams. (4.5k.)

⤿ f!reader, college!au, drinking + kissing, fluff fluff fluff <3 lowercase is on purpose , was blasting ceilings by lizzy so excuse the title

⤿ you're invited to another one of dina's off-campus parties not long after finals, where you meet a pretty girl who miraculously knows your name. away from the hustle of the actual party, where people are plastered out of their minds and making a ruckus, you and this pretty stranger get to know each other a little and earn yourselves a place in the other's heart.

“if you want anything just let me know, okay?” 

dina’s hand is warm, splayed across your lower back as she guides you away from what had to be the noisiest place at the party. it’s no surprise she attracts such diverse groups of people, given her gregarious personality and hard-to-overlook kind of beauty.

you would be lying if you said you hadn’t had a crush on her when you first met her; it’s dina, how could you not? thankfully, over maybe a year of getting to know her, you realized she wasn’t exactly your type and that she was far too head-over-heels for her on-and-off partner to even think about you. honestly, she never shut up about the guy.

“got it. thanks, dina.”

you definitely were not going to mention the almost completely assured possibility that you wouldn’t see her at all for the rest of the night. thing is, when you’re the host of parties like these, you tend to get thrown around a lot. though she doesn’t really seem to mind, since this is, at the very least, the fourth party you’ve been invited to since finals ended (which was around a month ago).

she hums passively at the acknowledgement, then gestures fluidly towards the rest of the room. there are a few people situated on her couch, a couple of them already putting on a show for the others while a few sit alone, sipping their drinks with reckless abandon. you’ve never gotten completely plastered at one of dina’s parties, always the type to stay back and help her clean up if she hasn’t passed out or gotten herself sick, but unsurprisingly, there are always those who’ll take any chance they can get.

“mi casa, su casa.” she sings, then she’s gone. 

left alone, you can handle yourself. why the hell would you come here if you couldn’t? you head towards what you remember to be the kitchen, but right now looks like a completely unprofessional bar complete with its own bartender—who you belatedly recognize to be jesse, dina’s on-and-off partner—in search of booze. 

said bartender nods at you when you catch his eye, pouring whatever’s on the table for tonight into a very typically red party cup—on the house, since you get special privilege—and sliding it over to the edge of the counter. whatever’s inside sloshes dangerously, threatening a mess which’d only add to the ugly stickiness of dina’s countertops, but you grab and take a whiff of it before it can tip over. 

“what, don’t trust me?” jesse ribs over the music—he speaks of your tentative sniff—, which is, as you’ve just realized, getting progressively louder. 

“if i say anything,” you mutter, which gets you his typical jesus christ, these people, kind of laugh and he leans back against the counter, right next to you. 

head crooked to the side slightly, you look him over. objectively, you can see why he and dina mesh so well; they’re both unbelievably attractive and complement each other’s personalities perfectly (from what you’ve seen, at the very least). their pretty much daily arguments aside, you can tell they love each other and only want the best for one another. that said, you can only imagine what’s running through his head right now.

“she’s not going to get shit-faced drunk,” he mutters, and that’s your cue to leave. you know he’s trying to console himself more than anything.

“no, she’s not.”, you respond in kind, patting his shoulder with just as much care as one would handle a two-hundred-pound gorilla, before pushing yourself up off the edge of the counter and walking out of the kitchen. god knows he could spend an hour sitting there talking about her; you’ve had enough of that for, quite literally, the rest of your life. 

the sole of your left shoe sticks to the ground a little as you walk, and you thank your past self for owning a strictly-for-parties pair of converse which were, sadly, a little too worn in for your own good. sneaking a glance into the main hall, you catch a glimpse of your best friend seated halfway up the stairs chatting with someone—maybe a senior? junior, at the very least—who’s got a guitar case slung over her shoulder and the most unruly head of short, auburn hair you’ve ever seen. 

dina’s gesturing wildly at the front door, likely having gotten into an argument with said stranger (except it looks far too fond to be serious), when the two of you make eye contact. her eyes are a strikingly pale kind of green, piercing through whatever weak defenses you’d put up for the night in a very relaxed fashion. she’s got this look on her face that screams uninterested, which is quickly swapped out for a look of rapt attention at your own once she realizes you don’t actually plan on looking away. 

because man, she’s hot.

it’s just then that a presumably tanked freshman crashes into you and spills the contents of whatever it is they were drinking all over you, effectively shattering whatever that was. really, you would be grateful for it—something to spare you the embarrassment of looking too interested in someone way out of your league—had there not been the undeniable presence of cool, once-iced liquor spilling down the front of your printed tee. 

“oh, fuck,” you curse, nearly missing their hurried apology before they barrel out the front door.

this wouldn’t be the first time. you sigh, reluctantly slipping away from all the noise, away from the pretty stranger, to deal with your problem. usually, you’d have an extra top shoved haphazardly into dina’s closet, something you could throw on in the worst-case scenario, but laundry day was just yesterday and all of your stuff was piled on your bed back home. already you could feel the liquor causing the shirt’s fabric to stick, leaving an icky, gross feeling that was begging to be cleaned up. the humidity from everyone’s breathing was not helping.

you set your cup down on a random table (never to be seen again) as you make your way to the bathroom. you wouldn’t be surprised to find the door locked, having been an unsuspecting party crasher one too many times in your first and some of your second year, but luckily the room’s unoccupied—not for long—and you slip in and lock the door behind you after waving off a concerned glance from jesse, who’s very slowly making his way to his girlfriend. no surprise there. 

“oookay, fuck.” you curse, flipping the light switch and nabbing a couple (a lot) of the mini towels out of dina’s probably way-too-expensive towel rack and pressing them to your front, hoping they’ll soak up some of the leftover moisture, at least save you from the mortification of showcasing to everyone your chest and abdomen.

it doesn’t really help.

again, not an irregular occurrence, so you’re not too worried; dina’s typical party etiquette has ensured that everyone here will leave you be and mind their own business. that doesn’t help your pride, but you concede to stepping back out and flipping the light switch off behind you as you make your way to the front.

this time, when you cross the main hall, dina’s gone and so is her friend. accompanying disappointment comes the ponderance of whether jesse found dina or not and if the pretty stranger has left, but you remind yourself you’ll find out later—probably near midnight when people start to filter out for the night and you’re tasked with cleaning up—, however frustrated that makes you, given the fact you’d lost a chance you probably never had in the first place. 

you pass a group of what look like sophomores playing beer pong against seniors—or maybe even graduates?—on your way out, and silently curse the growing pool of booze dripping on the floor right next to the table on your way outside.

the door is wide open, so being engulfed in cold air on your way outside is no surprise. luckily, the weather is calming down a little after a gruelling winter, so there’re only a couple of piles of leftover snow and the breeze doesn’t serve as an immediate freezer. however, your damp tee is anything but a savior and causes an eruption of a ton of goosebumps across the pane of your chest, stretching as far as your shoulders, which are only covered by the loose fabric of your top.

you’re not sure what you expect to see when you turn the corner to dina’s garage, but seeing her and her boyfriend sucking face is absolutely not it. dina’s got him pressed right up against the garage door, and you’re pretty sure that if jesse weren’t sober out of his mind he’d be giving into every single one of her wordless demands.

you slip past easily, far away enough to go by soundlessly and completely bypass the two’s freaky-ass sixth sense. the back gate is just as well-managed as the rest of the house and opens quietly, in no contrast to the backyard itself, which is empty and well-kempt. you know only you and a select few people are actually allowed into dina and her parents’ pretty backyard, so peace is expected and welcomed. the breeze is also blocked by the house, which is nice.

there are a couple of flowers blooming already, and their scent wafts through the air, bringing a natural sort of calm. the yard is illuminated by the house—light dances in beautiful patterns against the greens and greys that make up the garden—, but so is the relaxed silhouette of the same pretty stranger you saw less than ten minutes ago. this time, she’s hunched over in one of dina’s ugly bright-green lawn chairs with a guitar seated in her lap.

you consider her privacy and the fact that maybe she doesn’t want company right now or that she’s too busy with her music as you make your way over—aside from those ugly lawn chairs, really, there’s nowhere else to sit—but then banish your hesitancy with the acknowledgement that this is just as much a space for you as it is for her. 

the chair scrapes against the patio as you pull it out, just far away enough from the brunette to make yourself seem open and friendly, but respectful of her space. you worry the cheap plastic is going to snap beneath your weight as you sit down, but it holds well and serves as a final, much-needed resting spot for your already sore feet. once your rustling stops, you hear the gentle strum of a guitar and realize the girl hasn’t stopped playing.

you relax further into your seat. 

closer up now, you have the chance to really look at her. her hair’s pulled back now, half-up half-down, a lot less dishevelled than she’d been when you’d last seen her. 

looking lower, she’s wearing a low-cut short-sleeve and an unbuttoned flannel long-sleeve. skin-tight, ripped jeans line what look like toned thighs and spread legs, stained black and white converse completing the look. her fingers move deftly between frets, over strings, and you just barely catch the edges of a black and white tattoo peeking out from beneath her sleeve. she’s got really nice hands, you think, just as pretty as her face.

“i can feel you fuckin’ staring.” 

her tone is accusing, but not necessarily malicious or irritated; she doesn’t even look up at you when she says it, adjusting her guitar in her lap as she works at whatever she’s trying to play. her voice suits her, too, you think, and shift a little where you sit at the thought. 

“sorry. you’re really good at guitar.” you mutter, earning an amused chortle from the girl across from you. it’s a pathetic excuse—you’re well aware of your own unsubtlety—but there was something there, something between you two, not long ago, and you’re not just going to let it slip away. the alcohol’s got you pleasantly buzzed, and you’re sure that if you were a little soberer, you’d be embarrassed. 

“you think so?” 

she looks up now, a brow raised. you catch the slit in her right eyebrow, cocked slightly as her gaze rakes over you. she’s got this lilt to her voice that feels like it means trouble, however, it does nothing but pique your interest a little more. 

your response of “mhm. you play real nice.” earns you another glance over.

“i’ve seen you around a couple times. you’re a friend of dina’s, right?” she questions, looking between you and her instrument as she tunes what she seems to think is an out-of-tune string. her leg—the one which has the least contact with her guitar—bounces gently against the patio floor, and it takes you a second to realize she’s seen you around before and remembers you.

“yeah. best friend? i think? she likes to call it that.”, you joke, shoulders trembling slightly at the very unwelcome entrance of another breeze, carrying in the temperature from the front into the back. the sound of the stranger’s laugh is already addicting, especially when it feels genuine. that’s sometimes hard to come across, and you’re already starved for it even though you’ve been speaking to this girl for like, a minute.

“i’ll tell her you said that. shouldn’t she have an extra top for you or something?” 

“she does, usually. kinda forgot to leave a couple here.” you hum, pointedly ignoring the third glance over the girl’s given you since she’d first laid her eyes on you. her lips are pursed slightly, gaze trained wholly on your face whenever you speak yet it wanders when silence stretches between you two. her eyes are locked on something behind your head when she speaks again.

“are you two a..?” 

“thing? no, have you met jesse?”

“dina’s got a ton of other people that aren’t jesse, babe.”

your cheeks warm at the pet name, and you realize she’s right. dina’s had a couple of other flings outside of jesse; every time the two of them break up, she runs off to someone else before realizing she doesn’t want anyone but him. then, suddenly, without your permission, your mind wanders at the idea of someone wanting you the same way those two want each other. 

“no, we’re not,” you shake your head as she looks back at you. briefly, so momentarily, you question whether she actually likes girls or not—and if it seems like you do—so add a quick and easy-sounding, “think i liked her a year or so back, though.”

the stranger nods, and you’re suddenly hit with the fact that you don’t know her name. 

caught in your own head, you don’t register her leaning back in her seat, guitar following her movements, pressed right up against her abdomen. you do though, notice her shrugging her long sleeve off and balling it up in her free hand before it's carelessly thrown your way. your rapt attention towards her movement is pretty much the only reason you were able to catch it; it’s warm from her own body heat in your cold hands. it’s pretty obvious what she wants you to do with it, but you wouldn’t want to impose so you just stare at it.

“put on the damn sweater. it’s cold.”, she mutters, and you can’t help but bite back a smile at her tone; what was likely intended to come across as gruff and demanding sounds pleading and mildly concerned. you unravel the garment and pull your arms through the sleeves, a clean, earthy scent enveloping your once-shivering form.

“thanks, uh..”

“ellie. williams. ellie williams.” she stutters out, which is pretty cute.

“ellie. thank you.” 

that only gets you a grumble of acknowledgement before she’s back to her guitar. strands of her hair are slowly slipping out of her half-updo, and it only makes her that much more alluring. you’re well aware of the fact that you’re staring again, but she doesn’t seem to mind all that much as she starts up another tune. this one sounds far too smooth, too practiced to be something she even needs to go over, and belatedly you wonder if she’s trying to impress you. 

you two sit together quietly for god knows how long, accustoming yourselves to the other’s presence with ellie’s music writing over any awkward silence, and you drown in the admission that you could sit like this forever. the party inside is dying down, with a good chunk of attendees deciding to turn in early while the rest are either still on adrenaline highs or settling down for a couple of drinking games. 

“where’d you learn how to play?” 

you find yourself speaking before you can even think about it, and she doesn’t give you room to regret the interruption with the soft, loving little smile that breaks out on her face when she considers your question.

“old guy. his name’s joel.” 

you can’t help but smile at that; whatever harsh exterior she’s going for really isn’t working for her right now. almost every time she’s spoken to you, it’s either been with a smile, a laugh, or some poorly-concealed interest. joel, you think, taking that name and storing it for later, if there ever is a later with this girl. ellie.

“his guitar, then.” you hum, because it can’t be that much of a secret if a signature that deeply resembles his name is etched into a spot just above the pickguard. “you mind teaching me someday?”, you add, because there won’t ever be a moment where you don’t want to be talking to ellie; what you aren’t expecting is for her to look up at you with the same fond look that she’d looked at her guitar with just moments before, and nod. christ, you think, she’s so..

“we can start today, if you wanna.” she offers, and you try your very best not to seem too eager when you say yeah, for sure, but realize you’ve failed and that the pretty stranger–pretty girl sitting across from you doesn’t really care. she’s taking her guitar off her lap and making her way over to you before you can even second-guess yourself, crouching in front of you and raising an inquisitive eyebrow on her undeniably attractive, stupid fucking face.

you kind of want to kiss her.

you’re already imagining a future where you and ellie are, at the very least, friends—if not more, but you don’t want to get your hopes up—and are out like this every day, hanging out, being comfortable in each other’s presence because there’s no way this feeling of security is normal with someone you’ve just met unless you’re soulmates of some kind.

ellie makes a gesture, lifts her arms as a means of telling you to lift your own, and you swear its the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen. you lift yours and her hand snakes its way forward, pressing against your right shoulder so you’ll lean back a little. she’s strong, you can tell that much—as if the muscle lining every inch of her visible skin wasn’t enough—, and her touch is searing hot, leaving fire in its wake. 

she sets the guitar in your lap, spreads your legs gently by the knees, and waits expectantly with her hands out for you to offer up your own. you find yourself staring as she takes your hands, lithe, strong fingers beneath your own, lips parted slightly in both concentration and excitement as she positions your left hand under the neck, fingers splayed just slightly against the frets. she realizes you already have your other arm around the body, but reaches over to ghost her fingertips against the skin of your elbow anyways. 

she smiles. “try it. use your thumb. don’t break my guitar.”

the look you give her prompts another huff of laughter, but she seems to have enough faith in you to believe you won’t. it doesn’t seem like she plans on moving, though, since she’s still crouched in front of you and when you mutter a retributive “it’s joel’s,”, the pretty girl in front of you leans forward and rests her open palms on your knees, effectively cutting off any sly remarks.

you’re probably never going to forget the way her eyes light up when you strum it the first time, and use your very limited guitar-playing knowledge to press against a couple of the frets in succession and play what sounds like a semi-well-practiced harmony.

“holy shit,” she breathes, and you find yourself feeling bashful regardless of the fact you were only, like, thirty percent sure you could pull that off again. however, you manage to contain any sighs of relief and only exhale a chuckle in response. 

her eyes are still on you, you know, and you start absentmindedly fidgeting with the neck and its frets; her attention is everything you could’ve ever wanted, but her gaze is weighed and it’s making you feel a little self-conscious. you’re not starved for it by any means but it has been a while since someone has stared at you like this, awestruck out of their mind. it’s funny because for some reason ellie’s making this seem like such a huge deal when she’d spent the past, what—you’ve lost track of time—thirty minutes? an hour? playing a bunch of fucking songs on this old guy’s guitar, and—

“i had no idea you could play guitar..” 

her voice tears you out of your own head, and suddenly she’s closer to you than she has been all night. you lock eyes when she mutters your name, alarmed at the fact she knows it—you reason that she knows dina and you must’ve been mentioned in passing at least a couple of times—, and feel chills go down your spine, butterflies erupting in your stomach. i definitely want to kiss her.

“i can’t,” you huff, desperate to ease out the tension, “you outplay me by—”

“can i kiss you?”

her cut-off is abrupt and unexpected, and you swear your heart has never stopped like this. it’s such an innocent question, a plea of consent laced with insecurity, something the girl you’d seen in the main hall earlier into the night hadn’t even seemed like she possessed, but it’s so inherently ellie you don’t know what to do with yourself. so you nod. a quick tilt to your chin, up and down; you can’t trust your voice to work well enough for a yes.

but ellie needs to hear it. 

“say yes. i gotta hear you say it.”

you stare at her, and she stares back. the need to actually kiss her is growing unbearable now that you know she wants it too, but the mortification of knowing this pretty girl could hear the desperation in your voice—you haven’t even tuned into the fact that she sounds just as desperate as you—, the hitch of your breathing if you were to say yes, makes it hard to voice what you want.

so you don’t. she’s close enough, hands having slid upwards, her sweaty palms against your thighs in a subconsciously innocent gesture; any stray hair’s been tucked messily behind her ear, her lips are a little chapped and you see her throat constrict in a swallow when you reach forward with your right hand and thread your fingertips through the hair at the base of her neck.

and when you lean forward—as much as you can, with the guitar situated between the two of you—, ellie meets you halfway, semi-pulled in by your touch and mostly leaned in of her own accord. 

it’s a kiss. just that, a gentle press of the lips, but the glorification fiction has given it hasn’t been for nothing. maybe it’s just because it wasn’t with the right person, but you’re far from unfamiliar with it and it’s never felt like this. ellie kisses like she never wants to stop and you’re not complaining. you feel her grip tighten around your thighs, and you’re already running out of air even though you’ve only been doing this for a couple seconds. when you part, it’s with an unspoken promise of more.

“i’ve seen you around,” ellie starts, whispering against your lips. it sounds like a confession, something she needs to get off her chest, so you urge her to continue with your silence and the gentle circling of your thumb against her scalp. “with dina. or jesse. on campus. during those stupid presentations. or the social events. and i’ve always wanted to talk to you, you know? especially that one time, when you,” she inhales, smoothing her hands out against your legs. “when you corrected jesse on a fucking dinosaur name at the group’s museum outing.”

you stare at her, shuffling through images of every event you’ve ever gone to for dina’s sake when it hits you. a couple months back, before finals, probably when dina and jesse had gotten back together after a huge blowup, she’d found some stupid exhibit at a museum close to campus and presented it to you. she’d asked if you thought it was a good deal, especially because her friend, ellie, liked dinosaurs, and fuck, what is wrong with you?

“shit, you remember that?”

her silence is enough of an answer, gaze flitting between your eyes and lips nervously. 

“oh my god,” you exhale, keeping her still with the hand you have around her neck as you press your foreheads together. to think, if you’d been a little less ignorant at the time, you could’ve already known ellie. the two of you could have been friends, possibly more—which now, doesn’t seem all that ridiculous—, had you tuned in a little more to what dina was saying, had paid more attention to the rest of dina’s group when you’d gone out with her, had asked simply, back then, who’s ellie?

“is that weird? tell me that’s not weird. i kinda feel like a creep now, fuck. i swear i wasn’t, like, stalking you or anything,” ellie starts rambling, something you doubt you’ll ever get tired of. 

“you said you’ve seen me around a couple times. are you a creep?”, you tease.

“no! i mean, no. i just kinda, i only heard about you and saw you that time, and, shit–” 

you smile at her, let her go on as you lean further over the guitar, left hand reaching out to tuck a couple strands of her unruly hair behind her right ear, effectively cutting her off without saying a word. this awestruck look on her face is something you really, really want to get used to, and the feeling of her breath ghosting over your lips is far more welcome than anything else will ever be. 

“god, i wanna kiss you again.”

“do it.” you hum, and then ellie’s lips are on yours again and you swear this pretty stranger with the auburn hair is going to be the death of you.