Thank You Murder Drones For Reminding Me That I Still Like The Same Things As I Did When I Was 13

i’m gooning

why is my entire dash 9/11 jokes did smth happen or

i dont care if heaven wont take me back

Freaky Kylar. I don't even know what else to say, really.

Me every Easter (Thank you Mom)

the sexual tension between me and the bigass box of slim jims i received as a present

live footage of me trying not to make any dol run I do a sydney run:

sometimes you've gotta be a bit of a motherfucker about eating pussy. once they're warmed up and begging and grabbing your hair? ding ding! it's on. hold their squirming legs down with your hands and arms. make nasty delicious slurping noises. tilt your head sideways so you can take them in more fully. suck on their lips while you run your tongue back and forth over their clit. make sure they know you're doing it just as much for you as you are for them. get greedy with it. pause every now and then to give them a little rest and build the tension back up. tell them how pretty they look and how heavenly they taste. go back in for seconds. thirds. don't stop until they're shaking and yank you away.