Would You Still Love Me If I Was A Phantom Dancing In The Castle You Stumbled Upon Accidentally, With

I have not much to give but I'll tear out my heart if you ask to hold it.

It's painful when your pain begins to feel painless....

-Sloth

Rereading The Cruel Prince and the way Cardan was so much obsessed with Jude that he didn't know what to do so he just wrote her name several times on the paper like a mantra crackles me up each time.

And the fact Jude thought he did it because he hate her Like GIRLL, he's mad obsessed over you!

A Burning Love

Left with a bleeding heart,

An undying urge to crawl back to you.

All the shirts left behind burning in the hearth.

Was it really us that matter?

Or the ego you bring to the table?

All those flowers left at the doorstep,

I'll decorate your grave with them,

If not on your arrogance I will bury.

Don't beg for me in the evening,

When in morning you'll leave again,

Forget all the promises made,

Under the influence of my love.

You like to see me cry,

I like to see you bleed.

Your words, my feelings

My knife, your heart

A tragedy I will happily write

If you promise a last dance

Before we burn this house called love.

The Void

The rustle in the leaves, the pitter and patter

Not a single noise, not a single clatter

The void is watching but the world is blind

The creaks have quieted yet the mess is in the mind.

Winds picking up, the window rattle with violence

Where are my thoughts, guess I lost them in silence.

Rain is falling but the man in front of me stays dry

Is he the sins I committed or simply the void?

My hands are covered in blood in the dark

She turns on the light and it's just the ink

I ask her to tell me the difference and she's silent

For the pen and the gun are both weapon and waste depending on the hands.

If you were a puzzle piece and I was a square, I would ruin my edges just so we could fit together.

Bury my bones when I die and let the tree grow over it. The branches will still shiver at the sound of your name.

The Obsession

Sinking my teeth in, the warmth of his skin,

I'm haunting his nightmares, taunting his demons,

I'm the creature living in his closet,

The whispers when the light goes out,

I'm the demon in his mirrors, the insanity he's afraid of.

Candle light dinner with cherries and wine,

The food stays untouched, growing cold in night,

Cause he's the one I want in my plate,

The one I want to dissolve in my wine,

Take him like my schizophrenic pills.

Serve him in my plate like the prey caught,

To fulfill the craving of him that makes me crazy,

Rip him apart for me when he crawls to me,

When he's on his knees, ready to worship me,

Keep him in the glass case and lock it,

Keep him struck in the house of mirrors,

Where he will only come back to me.

Being Alive

So ruthlessly cold and empty,

These bedsheets mocking my sorrow.

Hearing every tick of the clock,

Reluctantly gazing at the mirror,

Seeing nothing but a wasted potential.

Strong is the urge to feel the life drain out of me,

Yet the dreams keep me awake.

All the thrill left to be experienced,

And all the cities left to be loved,

Leaves me wanting to see the life play out.

Setting the regrets on fire,

A toast to the feeling of being alive.

Let's get out and wander to a new country,

Dancing to the melodies we can't revive,

Singing the songs one never hears again in life.

Falling in love with strangers you see on the train

Knowing you'll never see them again.

Loving the cafes you know you'll never forget,

Turning the pages of a mysterious book,

In hurry, whose title you'll forget.

Dim lit windows

Dim lit windows at 1am, the record playing the same song,

Candles burning out, on the table are waiting more,

Pages filled with grief, her tears are the ink,

Dim lit windows at 1:30am, wonder if she ever sleeps.

Dim lit windows at 2:00am, the wind is blowing low,

Leaves rustle in the tree, a scent of caffeine from the stove,

Curtains left open, the red dress hanging from the door,

Dim lit windows at 2:30am, wonder if she didn't find a date for prom.

Dim lit windows at 3:00am, the rain is falling now,

Her shadow calmly walks upstairs, the cup of coffee left alone,

Caught the sight of her midnight black hair, the image was fickle,

Dim lit windows at 3:30am, the rain stopped, not a single ripple.

Dim lit windows at 4:00am, the curtains now closed,

Yet my thoughts are plagued by her and the melody of her favorite song,

The night is never dark for her, the street lamp making her feel at ease,

Dim lit windows at 5:00am, she has finally found peace in dreams.