• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony
- Jill Thomas Doyle
Predator (1987)
No me gustaaa! Feo!
Photoshop Tutorial: How to paint water in 10-ish steps. Reblog to save a life.
Reasons why that creative project has been sitting at 95% completed for months or years on end:
What remains to be done is all editing and revision, and you resent the fact that your work can’t just be perfect on the first try
You remember that there was something you wanted to change, but you didn’t write it down and now can’t recall what it was, and you can’t proceed until you figure it out
You’re stuck in a loop of “there’s this one problem that I know I can’t resolve without external feedback, but I don’t want to show it to anyone else until after that problem has been resolved”
It’s really the process that you enjoy, and you’ve learned that you can indefinitely postpone the emotional letdown of a completed project if you simply refuse to acknowledge that there’s nothing further to be done
The unhinged perfectionist part of your brain is convinced that calling a project finished is tantamount to admitting that you couldn’t have done it better
You got absorbed in a second project and genuinely forgot that the first one existed
Aliens
not a poll but everyone needs to know about this because tumblr has introduced another toggle that should have been opted out by default
go to your blog settings and scroll all the way down to the visibility toggles. turn this ON.
it may be turned on already if you have search turned off but its best to check anyway. this is not an account setting. you will have to do this for ALL of your individual sideblogs.
Aesthetics
I don’t know what are you talking about. “Neil Gaiman don’t seem to have any social media”.
I love that Tumblr is like “We got Neil Gaiman to do a question and answer session so send in your questions and maybe he’ll answer them!” as though the man hasn’t spent the last few years hanging out here answering random questions and cementing himself as a widely beloved fixture of this site
Memories, tales, thinkings, strategies, plans, dreams, remembrances and nonsenses from an upstart Dorsai.43M
165 posts