Lmao I'm Stealing This Idea.

Oh my god I love this.

APLAP (Assigned Pathetic Lifeform at Padawanship)

New padawan Obi-Wan trying to figure out how the FUCK to make his master listen and not abandon him to go running off following "the will of the force" when it hits him. Qui-Gon is perfectly happy stopping and taking care of pathetic life forms, but not Obi-Wan. That's it. He's always been prepared, always been dutiful, strong, self-sufficient.

He's cracked the code. He needs to be more pathetic.

The next time he senses Qui-Gon's about to run off he coordinates a scene of utmost pathetic-ness, that is, he throws himself into the nearest fountain. He trudges up to his master sopping wet, water-logged robes swallowing him, with hair sticking to his face and containing bits of algae from the fountain. He mumbles out an apology for being clumsy before looking up at Qui-Gon with the biggest, most woeful eyes possible to ask if he happened to bring any spare robes (he didn't, Obi-Wan knows this because he is usually the one to pack spare robes for them both). His wet hair is dripping water into his eyes that's beginning to turn them an irritated red, and there's algae sliding down the side of his face, it really is masterful work.

"Oh...I'm sure I'll be able to find something by myself, it's okay Master, I know you had important work to do."

Qui-Gon visibly hesitates. Obi-Wan starts shivering. He turns to walk away. He's stopped by his Master's hand on his shoulder. His Master, who walks back with him, who gets clean clothes from their hosts, who has folded like wet flimsi and even explains his stupid, stupid plan before choosing to hotwire a hoverbike with a passenger seat! Oh, Obi-Wan really has cracked the code!

Afterwards, Obi-Wan stages an increasingly pitiful accident for himself every time his patented 'Qui-Gon Jinn Bullshit' detector goes off. Eventually, his Master stops leaving him behind at all, even giving him funny looks when he turns around and Obi-Wan isn’t next to him. It never fails to make Obi-Wan grin and run to catch up. Sure, his reputation as a perfect padawan is in tatters, alongside his dignity, but it’s a small price to pay for a place at his Master’s side, for him to remember there’s a place for Obi-Wan there.

When the ray shields come up on Naboo, Qui-Gon doesn't charge ahead and leave his padawan behind, he hasn't for years. He waits for Obi-Wan because it feels wrong to do otherwise, his padawan belongs at his side.

Much, much later, when Obi-Wan is drinking to the end of the war with friends, Commander Cress will ask him how he kept General Jinn from running off for entire decade. Obi-Wan laughs, informs him, and resolutely ignores the scene Quinlan is making as the man cackles and pulls up a book to shove at them both, titled Classical Conditioning 101: A guide to subtle psychological manipulation.

Second part! Here’s the first part

Absolutely. This man could’ve been POPULAR and he stared at his brother and decided ‘No, I will NOT be doing that. No thanks.’ and made people leave him alone under threat of freshman meanness. Frankly? I wouldn’t wanna be friends with a rude freshman, freshmen are men, I was a freshman last year and we were mean!

Btw if you portray Zane as socially inept or anxious you’re going against his character and should label it OOC because that man’s charisma is off the fucking charts and chooses to be alone. People flock to him he just hates them.

Obi-Wan: *hangover drunk but not blackout drunk in an elevator* Hey, did you know I can do a standing split?

Cody: *has tapped that before, has had 15 cups of caff and is vibrating into a new reality* Haven’t seen it but I assumed.

Rex: People ask why I don’t wanna go to the bar with you two.

Anakin: *filming Obi-Wan trying to crawl the wall like an exorcist scene* We’ve been stuck in this elevator since the last gymnastics you did, Obi-Wan, maybe stick to the floor?

Obi-Wan: Okay. Cody get on the floor with me.

Cody: Why??

Obi-Wan: I don’t wanna float away.

Cody: Noah Fence. But if I sit down right now I might implode.

Rex: I’m so embarrassed to know them. I would actually rather die than be rescued from the same elevator with these two.

Anakin: *holds up his saber* I mean, at this point it might be worth Padme paying for the damages-

Obi-Wan: *starting to cry cause Cody won’t cuddle*

Cody: *humming at an alarming volume In overstimulation*

Rex: I don’t even care anymore, get us out of here so I can bleach my brain. Now.

Anakin: On it, boss!

jason todd unique second child privileges

your lonely martin is *mouth frothing* BARKBADK AGRRRR 🩷🩷🩷 okay okay but imagine martin lukas subtly courting jon "i'm interested in you i want to date you but i'll show it by making you tea and buying you stuff" kinda courting :3

jon would be confused yet delighted when he sees a box of his favorite pastries (i headcanon him as having a sweet tooth) on his desk when he arrives :)

jon is a dense guy though, that's why sasha and tim facepalm whenever martin makes his move and jon is just like "what the hell are you doing"

I feel like gift giving is the closest thing most of the Lukas family has to actually showing affection(except for Peter and Martin who are more open). So Martin does like gift giving to people he likes and especially so with crushes. Martin absolutely brings presents to the archive team when he comes back from trips.

But when it comes when he's interested in people he will give them gifts and tea and wait to see if they get the hint and ask him out. Martin will not be the first to ask that's too much confrontation.

Jon is delighted that Martin cares enough to give him things, but will not openly admit it and will most likely reprimand him for Martins unprofessional gestures. He will still eat the pastries and take home the rest of his gifts secretly.

Tim and Sasha are so done with Jon's behavior.

Mike is real tired of Martin's bosses behavior, mostly cause it's interrupting his and Martin's "will they, won't they" side plot he thinks is going on.

I just thought of a funny DpxDC prompt.

Danny was at a convention in Gotham. He was also getting some unfavorable attention from someone that mistook him for a Wayne and get them to leave him alone when he spots Bruce Wayne. He immediately goes up to Bruce and goes “There you are dad! This guy won’t stop following!”

Bruce, barely paying attention, on cloud nine because one of his kids needs help, just helps Danny and threatens the other person to take them to court for stalking his son or something.

Danny says his thanks and leaves.

Bruce doesn’t realize Danny wasn’t one of his kids until later.

Tim: If I got dipped in the Lazarus pit, it would be over for you guys.

Damian: I highly doubt that.

Tim: You would be the first to go.

Dick:

Dick: Tim, what do you mean by 'go'...

Tim:

Dick: TIM WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY GO

Tim, later to the YJ: that’s how I got Jason to come to dinner for once.

Kon, still beefing with Jason over trying to kill HIS Robin: EXCUSE ME?!?!?

Tim: oh Jason can't kill me anymore Jason: can't???? Tim: if you kill me, it'll be (Red Hood former alias of) the Joker killing (Red) Robin Tim: which means I will have aped every major aspect of your tenure as Robin, and since you'll have killed me, you'll be the one who made me your perfect replacement Jason: ...wh- Dick: okay, wait, getting killed by the Joker is NOT every aspect of Jason's tenure as Robin- Tim: I embezzled a Batmobile from Batman (stealing the Batmobile tires) Tim: I dropped out of high school (never got to finish) Tim: I was hated by the Robin before me (Dick hating Jason) Tim: and my falling out with Batman was based on him thinking I killed someone I didn't when they fell off a building (Bruce thinking Jason pushed Felipe Garzonas off a balcony) Tim: oh! and since Ra's al Ghul wants me alive, I'm reasonably sure he'd use the Lazarus Pit to revive me, so I could take that too! then I can get to work on stealing your identity as Red Hood :) Jason: Dick: Tim: I already took Red Robin :) Dick: ...wh- Jason: Tim, I hate you, I hate you so goddamn much. You are my favorite brother. You are the only Bat I respect and the only one I will ever willingly work with. You are completely insane. You are the best Robin there ever has been or ever will be. What the fuck is wrong with you. I love you. I'm going to shoot you in the leg now. Tim: make sure you miss the femoral artery!

Nothing to say. Just wanna spread this to my followers.

Harbinger of Chaos who??