Emotioncandau - Cocu Trouple

@myheartinherhands

As a cuckold, it excites you. That next level of cuckolding. It’s no longer just about your wife being fucked by other men for physical pleasure and fulfillment. Now, she has emotional feelings and fantasies with this man, needs and desires she hasn’t felt in years. That intoxicating new relationship energy.

But it scares you too. That fear that she might leave you for him, the nagging thought that you aren’t enough. It breaks your heart a little, knowing her heart is no longer exclusively yours. You now have to share her, both emotionally and physically.

And yet, you can’t help it. You’re different from many men, wired in a way that you can’t control and you shouldn't even try to. That arousal you feel. That intense, overwhelming arousal, takes you to a whole new level of sexual fulfillment, without even being the one having sex. Only a cuckold can feel and understand it and crave it.

I've had a few Tumblr accounts over the years, some shut down by Tumblr, and one with the caption above I shut down myself. It’s always fun to see captions floating around and stumble across old ones I created.

At the time of this one, she was beginning to fall in love with her bull. I was eroticizing it, wrapped in the fantasy of it all while dealing with angst.

When a wife falls in love with another man, it’s no longer just the open, structured dynamic of cuckolding. Deeper emotions surface. She wants private time, meaningful conversations, shared experiences, weekend getaways with another man that don't include me. The things we all crave in a boyfriend-girlfriend or husband-wife relationship.

That’s when I started noticing little lies, half-truths… and eventually bigger ones. I couldn't contain my angst, I snooped on her phone. Watching her fall in love was incredibly arousing, but also deeply painful. The fear of losing her was overwhelming. It stripped away my confidence as a husband. Yes, it emasculated me even further.

Long story short: in a fit of angst, I decided I no longer wanted to be “Sissy By Her.” I deleted the account, threw away all my panties, and ordered men’s boxers. When they arrived, I put them on proudly, trying to "man up."

But it felt fake. Not me. I hated the feeling of being in mens boxers again, lose around my dick, just not fitting my body right.

That angsty fit lasted maybe seven days before I ordered 20 pairs of the thong panties I love, in all different colors. Yes probably went over board with the amount, it just felt like such a strong need.

By then, my wife had ended things with him in an attempt to protect our marriage. And I begged her, truly begged her, to go back. To reconnect with him. To cuckold me however she wants. Even if it means being in love with another man. So is was fitting to name my next blog - life of.