Bruce Trying To Shove Talk His In Law

COOL MAN😎😎

i love bat/birdflash sm

Lily’s Ghost that Hunts them 5

Ron: *complaining about a Karen at his summer job in the hospital* She came at me a; ‘No. You can’t be a nurse, you’re not wearing the uniform’.

Lavender: Oof.

Kellen: *mumbles* This is why I work with animals.

Ron: Should have join you. I mean what did that lady expect? The uniform to be a slutty nurse outfit? *cracks the table with a bang of his fist* Get over it Stacy.

Professor Slughorn: *pause, turns around and walks out of the classroom* Not to day Satan.

(Marauder’s era)

Lily: *complains about her job because of a karen*

Her dorm mates: *nods in understanding*

Lily: What did she expect? Us to be wearing slutty maid uniforms? Come on Susie. *bangs her fist, cracking the table* Get with the program.

Professor Slughorn: *jumps and spills hot tea on his pants*

Lily's Ghost That Haunts Them

Ron:*Standing in front of Harry with a broken leg, mangle arm from being bit and ready to throw down* You wanna go bro? You wanna go down?! I can take you! Kick your arse! You wanna kill Harry? Y'all got to kill us all! Come at me you lily-white, ugly arse-

Harry:*panicking, trying to get Ron to sit and off his broken leg* Oh fucking Merlin! Ron! Ron! No bad Ron! *Struggling* Calm down please!

Ron: No balls, nipples hanging, skinny twink!

Sirius: *having multiple horrifying flashbacks to when Lily Evans starting fights in righteous anger over her friends all throughout Hogwarts with James Potter trying to calm her down in a panic*

Sirius: Welp…I lived an okay life.

Ron: I don’t need a bloody wand to-

Hermione: *covering her face in embarrassment and fear* Shhhh Ron, no, please! Stop egging the bloody serial killer! Ronald!

Ron: *lets out a scream as he tackles a shrieking Sirius*

Remus/Severus/Peter: *Flashback to when 4’9 first year Lily taking on a guy twice her height and weight….and winning* Bloody fuck…

Wally’s Favorite 3

Cass: Someone call Wally to pick us up. I don’t trust Steph after she totaled the car.

Steph: *about to refute but pauses, looking at the broken care* You right. You right.

Duke: I don’t have his number yet. *looks around at his new siblings nervously*

Damian: Worry not, Thomas. I have place West’s number last night as The Red Head Richard Can’t Get.

Dick: Awe, Dami. That’s so sw- * realize what he said* Hey!

Duke: *looks so done* Impeding on my privacy must really be a bat thing.

Dick: Don’t worry, I got this. *calls Wally*

Barbara: *4 minutes later* He don’t got this.

Dick: *pouts* He’s not picking up.

Jason: He never picks up. *smirks* Special if its you.

Dick: *offended*

Tim: *just got off the phone with Wally* I don’t know what you guys are talking about. He always picks up for me.

All: Of course.

Dick: *torn between picking a fight over being the favorite and be terrified over Wally’s temper*

The second chapter is out *cries*

Dazatsu Month Day 10 and 26 WIP

~.~4 years ago~.~

“Then who the hell is this?”

Dazai Osamu felt as if the world was coming down on him when he looked at body that was not Dostoevsky Fyodor. It was nothing but some dried up mummy of a man that had no defining features. An urge to throw himself onto the ground (this time not out of worried confusion) and roll around until the dirt scrap every inch of his skin off. He wants to grip his greasy, dark, wavy brown hair tightly in his hands and pulled and pull and pull. Pull so hard that it lend to his scalp bleeding from the force.

“During the prison break race….Dostoevsky was frantic.”

Atsushi was in danger.

“He was frantic…because death at my hand or by poison wouldn’t do. What he needed was to be killed by a vampire.”

He was in danger and Dazai was stuck here in Meursault.

The agency was without its dagger in the shadows.

Letting out a snarl, the rust brown eyed man pivoted on his broken leg and ran back into the building. Ignoring the knives carving themselves into his legs.

”Oi! Mackerel! What the face?!” Chuuya barked like the dog in his ear. “Dazai!”

”He’s not dead!” The said man gritted through clenched teeth to stop from shrieking like a banshee. “His ability! We were wrong! I was wrong!”

Those words felt as if he failed. As if all the energy, sweat, and blood he put into his plan meant nothing. Chuuya could be heard stomping right behind him, cursing a storm. From the corner of his eyes, he watched as the shorter scoop up the sleeping Sigma and chased after him. Dazai close his eyes tightly in gratitude that his old partner followed without a second thought. Reopening his eyes, he pushed himself harder to get to the control room.

He had to get in contact with Ango Sakaguchi as fast as he could. Atsushi’s time was running out. Who knew what was happening all this time he was just lying on the ground. Every minute he does nothing was a minute that his best friend loses. A lost minute that his Atsushi gets closer to wha that fucker has planned.

Bump

Thump

Pain shot throughout his body making him gasp and stumble. It was like he was being shot at. Another wave crashed into him as if Kenji struck him full power. It was far worst then a gunshot as he fell to his knees. Chuuya skid to a stop with a shout. Pain clawed its way into him as if it was a tiger mauling its teeth into the soft belly of its prey. He vomited up what little dinner he had eaten earlier as he tried digging his fingers into white tiles.

“Son of a bitch.” The orange lovelock haired man cursed as he put his cargo on the ground. He raced towards the pain-in his ass of an ex-partner, worry sketching itself on to his face. “You took the antidote right? Hey shithead! Did you take the antidote?”

Practically coughing up a lung, all Dazai could do was nod his head. He wanted to snark at the idiotic slug because he was there when the ex-demon stabbed the needle into his skin. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. He thought as he grabbed his throat and started to rake his short nails into skin wasn’t covered by bandages. This cause the other to freak and try to pull his hands away.

Watery Rust brown eyes peered deep into wide bight ocean blue eyes. (He could see hint of green swirling around like a full moon tidal wave. For a moment he couldn’t help but wish that his personal little moonlight that is his sweet little Atsushi, would never meet the tsunami that is Chuuya Nakahara. Only to remember that they had met and both could never look away from each other. As if they were the moon and sea locked in a dance no human should witness. Dazai had never once felt the need to raze the city to the ground until the day he found them trapped in the elevator.)

“Osamu!”

The world went black.

What the fuck

So my mom went and got a storage unit in my name, and putt all my stuff in it without telling me. Now, I’ve got to pay off the late fee and the storage payment, or I lose everything. My bed, my clothes, my journals, my art portfolios, my son’s clothes, his bed, his toys.

I’m going to lose everything if I can’t come up with $100 in the next two weeks. I fucking hate my life. I just want all this shit to fucking end. Even if I got a job tomorrow, I still wouldn’t have the money by the due date. I thought I finally got away from her abusive ass, but I’m still fucking suffering because of her. What the fuck what the FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

What a horrible waste of good pasta man

fucking. what?

Julie D’Aubigny was a 17th-century bisexual French opera singer and fencing master who killed or wounded at least ten men in life-or-death duels, performed nightly shows on the biggest and most highly-respected opera stage in the world, and once took the Holy Orders just so that she could sneak into a convent and shag a nun.

(via Feminism)

Hello skinny tgirl. Lately you've been complaining that your tits aren't growing. In front of you is a plate of food.