Are You Ever On Your Phone Looking At Gay Shit And Then Your Parent Starts Coming Towards You, So You

vader didn’t have to fly to a small, remote moon to look for the remains of one, insignificant jedi in the old wreck of a republic cruiser, but anakin—oh, but anakin needed to.

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

based on that iconic parks n rec scene. u know the one.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Crack

Cedric: What did you want to tell me, Harry?

Harry: Have my babies

Cedric: ...

Harry: I mean, the first task is dragons

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McGonagall: Potter, who is your partner for the Yule Ball?

Ron: *kicks down the door while in a stunning blue dress and four-inch heels*

Ron: It's me, bitches.

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Ron: My dad sent you this to help with the second task

Ron: *opens up box to reveal a bunch of rubber duckies*

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Harry: Can you give me advice on how to talk to girls?

Sirius: *stares at Harry blankly while the Mii theme plays*

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*Quidditch world cup*

Arthur: Hey, where's Percy?

Harry: I'll go check

*five minutes later*

Harry, traumatized: He's fucking my old Quidditch captain

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Draco: *sees Harry and Ron dancing at the Yule Ball*

Draco: MY FATHER WILL HEAR ABOUT THIS

*later*

Draco, writing a letter: Dear Father, I have never been so heart broken or betrayed

ok as amazing as Twilight of Apprentice was how funny would it have been if Ahsoka was just beyond done with Anakin’s bullshit™ and just screamed “FUCK OFF SKYGUY” everytime she saw Vader

“The man you knew as Anakin Skywalker is de-”

“Cut the shit, Anakin, I know it’s you. You just flew in standing on top of your TIE fighter and there’s only one fucker in the galaxy who’s that extra”

Im reading the Ahsoka novel and there is an Anakin flashback chapter where Anakin is thinking about how he has so many conflicting promises and commitments and then it lists, in order 1. Commitment to the Jedi 2. His marriage to Padme, and, 3. His “unspoken but no less important commitment to Obi-Wan” lmao … Ah yes the 3 things in life to be mindful of. Your cult, your wife, and your second, more terrible wife. Your wife and your Taller Wife

One thing I love about the Batfamily is that they’re all so smart and talented and at the same time such dumbasses: 

 Bruce: Is the worlds greatest detective and has contingencies for everything yet can’t have a conversation about emotions to save his life 

Barbara: has the worlds most advanced information network and yet she thinks that the best way to get out of danger half the time is to blow up whatever building she’s in (she has done this multiple times) 

Dick: Has led multiple super hero teams but has no idea how to do his taxes and had to rely on his literal Alien Girlfriend for that 

 Jason: Recites Shakespeare and quotes Orwell. Took over half the Gotham Underworld at 18 and yet he crashes into buildings and the entire reason he wears a mask under his helmet was it became a habit after he did it once for dramatic effect 

 Tim: The Actual Worlds Greatest Detective and he forgets that miles and kilometres aren’t the same thing 

 Cass: Worlds greatest fighter who started learning English at like 17 and can hold conversations easily by 19-20 (that’s an entire language!) and yet she comes up with plans like ‘beat up every mob member until I get the one I want’

Steph: Made puzzles that the police needed to call Batman into solve, she tracked down multiple villain operations multiple times, she knows how to break into the batcave, she once locked Tim out of his own computer systems, she can combat majority of Gotham villains with nearly no equipment or training and has gotten in the way of Penguin’s operations multiple times, she can stay one step ahead of both Bruce and Tim the world greatest detectives for extended periods and can take down the most sophisticated ai in the world yet she falls down in construction sights and thinks crashing a car into a guy with a superspeed suit is a good plan. 

Duke: Is smart enough to listen to seasoned vigilantes & solve crimes yet he thinks being shot is cool & says things like “go go ghost vision”

Damian: Raised by an elite assassin organisation from birth and got PHD’s at like 7 yet he tries to do things like drive a bus even though his feet don’t reach the peddles and jump on guys with gasoline blood in a room that’s on fire

ATLA characters as royalty

this was…kind of a warmup writing exercise that I ended up liking more than I thought I would, so enjoy?

Aang: A lost prince, a ghost prince, a prince who will never take the throne. A palace with open windows; a fountain that has run dry. He carries an unused blade at his side, its hilt wrapped in cloth instead of leather.

Katara: A queen with too many connections, weaving a web of human life. A satchel lying open on her desk, spilling medicines and poisons over the floor. Folded letters in her cloak. Healer’s hands, stained with blood. A dagger she chooses not to draw.

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watched this for the first time when i was 14 i think? it saved me

“This is the house that built me and I’m gonna burn it down.”

Courtney Love Prays to Oregon, Clementine von Radics