This Is The Funniest Tweet I’ve Seen In Months Bye

So this si love??~~~

Imagine Zhongli in his dragon form feeling a little playful when it comes to his human partner.

You'd be taking a dip in the river on a warm and peaceful day while your draconic husband keeps watch, and this damn glorified reptile thinks it would be funny to snatch your clothes from the riverbank and keep them in his mouth to watch you flail and whine and beg for them back. And this dragon is patient, so it would take a while until he decides to quit teasing you and return your modesty.

You'd find him lounging around in the garden, all coiled up, and ask him if he'd like some snacks. He'd eye you with that draconian gaze, eyes gleaming like stars, and utter a reverberating chuckle. Then he'd say, "Ah, how generous of you to offer yourself up for me," and proceed to chase you around the garden at a slow and gentle pace, his maw open and waiting to clamp around you. (Don't worry, he takes care never to actually hurt you.)

If you're trying to escape during one of his shenanigans while in his dragon form, you generally go into the house so his lofty self cannot pursue you. Alas, your home has way too many windows - so he simply presses his face against whichever window you're closest to and watches you expectantly. Then you'd run over to a different section of the house, after which he'd simply look for you through the other windows again until he finds you and resumes staring at his beloved. Rinse and repeat. (His tail wiggles whenever you come into sight.)

Speaking of his tail, Zhongli thinks it's funny to just...pick you up with it whenever he pleases. You'd be reading, minding your own business, and then your husband's tail would wrap around you and lift you into the air. He'd nuzzle you affectionately, perhaps give you a loving lick or two, and then set you back down and amble away like nothing happened.

“Victorians were stuffy prudes.”

Just some good quality toshi

Apple pie cupcakes

More zim and peridot please

Headcannon: Purple checks himself to make sure he looks pretty and his self confidence is very delicate

Kinda like Pleakly…

they like each other and they’re absolutely weaponizing it

***spoliers*****

11 Reasons why not. 13 reason why spoilers

Mom and Dad: They will blame themselves, and it’s not their fault.

New York: I could get there someday. If not college, then after college. And maybe I could start over there.

Clay: He will also think it’s his fault, and it isn’t. He’ll think he could have saved me. But we can’t save people, not that way at least — it’s more complicated than that.

Writing: I might, might write something great one day. Get it published. Even be a writer. Seems unlikely — but possible.

Dad: Loves me without question. Always wants what’s best for me. Even though I’m mad at him, it would be unfair to him to leave.

Mom: I don’t know if she could live through it. She is always so on edge already. But maybe that’s already my fault. I know she loves me — I wish she knew that I knew.

Mom and Dad: Worked so hard to give me a better life. Would be letting them down.

Helmet: Is a genuinely good guy. And I genuinely like him. And maybe we’re supposed to be together. Don’t know. But maybe. If I go, we’ll never find out.

Maybe: Someday I could make a difference in someone else’s life.

Maybe: I’ll have a kid of my own one day, and maybe she could be that someone else.

Maybe: It’s not as bad as I think it is. Maybe it will get better.

“Eleven reasons. She came up just short. But she left so many out. You know that, don’t you? No matter how many reasons there might be “why” there are always more “why not.”

яıċһ ҡıԀ ѧssһoʟє pѧıňţ mє ѧs ѧ νıʟʟѧıň …

Yet another wip ! Featuring : The tale of Rad and Purpose, the two toll gay assholes