it’s awesome how we have unlimited chances to become a better version of ourselves
(1) Pay phone at corner store, (2) Harry Dodge & Silas Howard, (3) Anna Joy, Elitreo, and Asia. San Francisco 1996 by Chloe Sherman
Normal Girl - SZA (2017)
diary of an aging girl #1
I grew up with this overwhelming shadow of discreetness, I stayed still in the uncomfortable seats of my school waiting for my peers to turn and acknowledge me.
In being discreet and timid, my need to feel more than a child, more than a girl hoping for a better future came to fruition. I think about it now and how desperate of a fourteen year old I was, desperate to be understood and taken care of. To talk with someone who understood my feelings more than I did, who had already surpassed the years of longing and had become their own person.
What transpired until I became an adult was something sinister and addictive. I can read back through my old journals and see this girl who knew what she wanted even in the haze of desperation, even when she knew it was wrong.
But I can remember the intricate ways in which these men who were aware of my age understood this brutal need and took my desperation as a total yes into corrupting something that should have been mine for many years to come. It had happened too fast and for too long, when my mind was trying to come to terms with an identity brewing.
I like to think I have put past those memories, especially after coming out as a lesbian. I still have this need to be wanted and it distorts with my hypersexual tendencies. It’s not a good thing and framing my younger self as desperate is not ideal since I’m sure at the time it was just a need to feel desired.
-doaag xx
thinking about how last year when i was genuinely going through it because of a situationship and how in the midst of it all i was having so much fun and how this year im going THROUGH it and i can’t even blame her.
i think about how it was the first time i really liked someone and that i could see it evolving from simple messages and how i was so forthcoming with what i liked and how much they meant to me. and told them how id appreciate it back but never got that. im so glad its over and i don’t harp on it anymore but its like will someone communicate like how i do.
i want someone to tell me they hate me or that they need me or that they don’t want me. i genuinely don’t care if it’s a negative thing i just would rather it be communicated.
1. Are looks important in a relationship?
2. Are relationships ever worth it?
3. Are you a virgin?
4. Are you in a relationship?
5. Are you in love?
6. Are you single this year?
7. Can you commit to one person?
8. Describe your crush
9. Describe your perfect mate
10. Do you believe in love at first sight?
11. Do you ever want to get married?
12. Do you forgive betrayal?
13. Do you get jealous easily?
14. Do you have a crush on anyone?
15. Do you have any piercings?
16. Do you have any tattoos?
17. Do you like kissing in public?
20. Do you shower every day?
21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?
26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?
28. Have you ever been cheated on?
29. Have you ever cheated on someone?
30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?
31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?
32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?
33. Have you ever had sex with a man?
34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?
35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?
37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?
41. Have you had sex so far this year?
42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?
43. How long was your longest relationship?
44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?
45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?
46. How many times did you have sex last year?
47. How old are you?
48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?
50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?
52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?
53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
54. Is there someone you will never forget?
55. Share a relationship story.
56. State 8 facts about your body
57. Things you want to say to an ex
58. What are five ways to win your heart?
59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)
60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?
61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?
62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?
63. What is your definition of “having sex”?
64. What is your definition of cheating?
65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?
66. What is your favourite roleplay?
67. What is your idea of the perfect date?
68. What is your sexual orientation?
69. What turns you off?
70. What turns you on?
71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?
72. What words do you like to hear during sex?
73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?
74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?
75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?
76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?
77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?
78. What’s your dirtiest secret?
79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?
80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
81. Who are five people you find attractive?
82. Who is the last person you hugged?
83. Who was your first kiss with?
84. Why did your last relationship fail?
85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?
i hate acting insane but i’m grounding myself with the fact that this is time to act like it, like yes i can tell the person i like that im only for them yes i can
Even if I don't end up wifed up to a butch in the future, even if I become an elderly femme with an empty bed and an additional, never sat on chair by the dining table, I will still love butches with my whole heart.
All the same.
Help them, support them, amplify their voices in the community.
Perhaps bake them an apple pie and make them pierogi for dinner with some kompot to drink :']
I ♡ butches.
i don’t get periods often like i’ve had a year where i didn’t have one at all and i also was really late into having one but im on it now and im horny as hell AND in pain ? how does this work
genuinely me right now
Party Girl (1995) dir. Daisy Von Scherler Mayer
ramblings of an 18 year old lesbian.she/they femme
100 posts