Dangerousangleofadream - Femdom

Oral Pleasures

FLR Tips is the sister site to FLR Info, where you’ll find introductory information about Female-Led Relationships. If you’re new to this, you should head over there. This site is about the practical, day-to-day aspects of FLRs. It is much more explicit and quite sex/femdom-oriented. Consider yourself warned.

Cunnilingus is pretty much a staple of FLRs. Our men love to perform it on us for hours on end, and we just lie back to receive orgasm after orgasm, night after night. Right?

For lots of FLR couples, this is indeed the case. Most men who are drawn to FLRs and properly starved of orgasms, are extremely happy campers when they get to put their head between their woman’s legs. And there’s no doubt that many women thoroughly enjoy it, too. Properly done, many of us will agree that it feels wonderful and can be extremely satisfying, both physically and mentally.

For others, it isn’t quite so simple. Some women enjoy it as foreplay, but not as the “main course”, at least not night after night. Others enjoy it when they are able to relax, but have certain issues preventing that from happening most of the time. Finally, there are those who feel plenty relaxed, but just get nothing out of it. 

The premise of the rest of this article is that you’d like to enjoy oral sex more, since it is a very practical and natural expression of the power dynamics in an FLR relationship. If you’re happy about not caring about oral sex, that’s perfectly fine - go read another article.

Let’s say that you generally enjoy oral sex, but you don’t find it particularly interesting, and you’d get bored pretty quickly if it was the main ingredient in your sex life. In my experience, this is the most common attitude among women who are new to FLRs, and it’s a perfectly reasonable attitude to have! Here are my tips for you:

Revel in the power your pussy holds over your man. Even if you don’t find it particularly sexually stimulating, you might find it very satisfying as a ritual. Speaking for myself, I feel that being on the receiving end of very frequent and utterly one-sided oral sex is the symbol of feminine rule in our household. And I know my husband feels the same way.

Think of it more as pampering than sex. It certainly doesn’t have to be the main ingredient of your sex life, even if you do it on a daily basis. It can be something you do as a ritual, because you find it pleasant, because you feel it is befitting your type of relationship, because it makes your man happier etc. Whenever you feel like having a different kind of sex, just do so.

Having an orgasm is not necessarily the goal. There are countless things your man can do while he is between your legs, and licking you to orgasm is just one of them. This applies to you as well - you don’t have to stop what you’re doing just because he is down there performing his duties. In fact, it probably has a stronger “FLR ritual effect” if you both treat it as nothing our of the ordinary. So continue reading your book, play with your phone, or even do a little bed-side work. If it becomes pleasurable enough that you want to just lie back and enjoy an orgasm, then you should of course do that, but only if that’s what you feel like.

If you do have an orgasm, you certainly don’t have to end things. You’ll probably be extra sensitive right after you orgasm, so he should learn to ease back to gently kissing you or whatever for a while, but feel free to go for another orgasm or a nice, long period of post-orgasm oral pampering.

Don’t worry about his comfort - at all. If you feel more comfortable being covered in sheets or a duvet, have him crawl under it and stay there for as long as you want, nevermind if he gets hot. If you want to lie on your side or your stomach, go right ahead, nevermind if it forces him to maintain an awkward position to reach you properly. Not only does this free you to be as comfortable as you can, but he will absolutely love you for being selfish and demanding like this. Trust me.

Make the oral sex about power play. Sit on his face, rub your juices all over it, restrict his air flow, have him lick your ass instead. Many women, myself included, enjoy this part at least as much as the actual licking. Using your pussy and ass as “weapons” can be an immensely powerful and enjoyable feeling.

If you don’t actively dislike it, use oral access to your pussy as a reward for your man. Conversely, if you do enjoy it frequently, take it away for a period as punishment.

Focus on other aspects of it. Surely, there’s a certain psychological pleasure to be had from knowing that you have a man who would love nothing more than to go down on you every single night, when your vanilla girlfriends are lucky to get it once a year?

Understand that for a lot of men it’s not mainly about the licking, it’s about having their faces close to the “holyest” of anatomical places. The smell, the wetness, the warmth, the opening up of your legs, serving your needs, the mere symbolicm of it.

Don’t feel obligated to learn to love it. If you do, great - your man will be pleased. If you don’t, there are plenty of other things to enjoy in a FLR, and you can still get it whenever you feel like it.

To me, it’s all about seeing the possibilities rather than fretting about whether you find oral sex satisfying enough.

OK, let’s turn now to those who enjoy (or think they would enjoy) oral sex when everything is just right, but who can’t ever seem to relax enough for it to be just right. This is also quite common, I believe, and can be caused by a multitude of reasons, mostly psychological. I don’t want to trivialise the issues these women are experiencing, but here are some general tips:

Explain the issues to your man and try to resolve them together. He will be more than happy to take it slow if it means there’s a chance he can get more “facetime” in the future.

If you worry about how you smell or look, consider taking your man’s enthusiasm at face value. He most likely doesn’t care, or positively loves how you look and smell.

If the intimacy bothers you for some other reason, try taking your mind off it by doing something else while he is occupying himself. Read a book, browse Facebook or Instagram, play a game, watch TV.

If you feel like you always have to be fresh out of the shower when enjoying oral sex, please don’t. Our type of men generally enjoy quite a bit of muskiness, just don’t overdo it unless you’re sure your man is into that.

See a doctor if you think you have some issue that really does makes your vagina unpleasant to be around. It may be easy to fix.

Beyond these simple tips, I don’t have much to offer. The types of issues that cause some women to find oral sex difficult can be complex, and I am not a professional counselor. Just remember that your man is your partner in this, and he can be a big help if you let him.

Finally, let’s turn to those who find oral sex just plain boring or downright painful. Again, it’s fine if you don’t feel the need to start liking it, this is for those who see the appeal in frequent, enjoyable oral sex, and would like to get there.

If you find oral sex painful, give your man clearer instructions. Have him steer clear of your clitoris, have him gently kiss instead of lick etc.

If the issue is a lack of physical stimulation (not enough friction, a preference for rougher sensations etc.), try giving your man clear instructions. He can use his tongue more forcefully, he can expose your clitoris more fully, he can move his head more vigorously, he can rub his beard against your most sensitive areas and so on. Also see the point about vibrators and toys.

If you need to be filled to feel any enjoyment, have him bring a dildo of your liking on his excursions. He doesn‘t need to move it a lot, it could just be used to get you in the mood.

Make it more interesting. Have him bring a vibrator, a butt plug or whatever else you enjoy, and tell him how to use what he brings.

I believe most women can find enjoyment in oral sex, it’s mostly a matter of finding ways to do it that suit their preferences and temperaments.

Personally, I find oral sex the most fitting expression of my husband’s deferrence to me as a woman. I also find it highly pleasing sexually, so we do a lot of it.

How I ride the cum out my boyfriends dick

- wrap around him like a goddamn snake. squeeze my thighs up against his body and all that good stuff.

-I slide my hand under the base of his neck so if I want to play with his hair or kiss his neck, I got control over that.

-rhythm yo. Like when I masturbate, I like for there to be a certain pattern it works for dicks too. Dance on that dick.

-don’t let him fuck you back. when I ride my bf, I’m in control. He isn’t allowed to thrust or move or anything. Just allowed to quiver and moan.

-KEEP THAT RHYTHM. I don’t like speeding up. I like making him cum while I’m going slow. I feel like it makes his orgasm last longer and is more intense.

-when I feel him clenching up his body and getting close I like to put my hands in his hair and rub his head while I ride him (at the same pace I’ve been going)

-I like to kiss his neck too at this time it sorta just like builds everything up.

-when he tells me he’s close, I squeeze him tighter like I’ll basically hug him while riding him (idk if that’s just a my bf thing but he really likes being held)

-while he’s cumming I like to keep the rhythm I’ve been going at and then towards the end I slide that dick all the way back in and just sit on it and clench my pussy to make him all squirmy wormy.

And that’s how I ride the cum out my boyfriends dick and I like to just make it all about him sometimes because I loveeeee pleasing him it makes me happy.

Date an exceedingly intelligent boy, so it’s all the more satisfying when you manage to fuck him stupid.

“Never forget to stroke your pony when she did well in training.”

You don't need to think, little thing. That's not what you're there for. Your purpose is to look nice and make me happy!! That's good, isn't it? So much less stressful than other aspirations. And you're so good at it already! Such a good toy, I'm really proud of you! And I'm very very lucky to own you

I'm sorry!

"What's all that sulking, kiddo? You wanted to come to my 22th birthday party?! Are you being fucking serious??!!! I would never bring a baby with me to such a grown-up gathering. Everyone would make fun of you, and you'd be throwing a tantrum as soon as I changed your diaper in front of everyone. Well, all my friends and their boyfriends know about your special protection, hon! And they can be cruel...

What was that? Of course, idiot, Daddy is also coming! He'll join us straight after work. Imagine being him and having to choose between me, a 22yo hottie, and you, a 27yo toddler whose haiwless pwincess parts are aaall covered in piss by now. Such an easy pick, right?

No, there's no babysitter for you today! We've decided we want you to show us what a big girl you can be by staying in your crib the whole night. You already had dinner, so what's the matter? I'll even let you use your old mobile phone, so you can read those Tumblr stories you enjoy so much... Doesn't your Baby Dino plushie want sooo much to feel your desperate thrusts through the padding? I bet so.

What? Why are you crying? I can't understand your silly babbles, sweetie. What's that tantrum about?? God, you're so pathetic.

What??? Ayu-stuff hasn't published anything in more than a month???? So you won't be able to hump yourself to sleep while reading a new caption of his? HAHAHAHA well I'm very sorry, sweetie, but adults have responsibilities and they can't keep track with such horny little babies like you.

I mean, if you're such a mature, grown-up girl, you'll be able to wait a few more days for him to publish more humpy captions, right?

Right, baby? God, stop. Fucking. Crying!

I can't take this anymore. I'm locking your crib tonight and there's no phone for you anymore. You can play with the crib mobile I made especially for you by hanging my used panties over your little face, while you dream of a new Agu? Asu? Ayu? Whoever-stuff's caption. I'm sorry!"