The Enchantress: One For The Road

The Enchantress: One for the Road

The hero crawls through the bushels, escaping the enchantress’s domain toward freedom…

Unfortunately as he peeks out of the bush he sees the enchantress’s legs, which, as he looks up, are evidently connected to the rest of her. She smiles down at him, hands on her hips.

Enchantress: Escaping, are you?

Hero: … Damn it.

She kneels down and lifts his face by the chin. She chuckles.

Enchantress: Oh, worry not. I’ve already had my fun. Last night you were conquered thoroughly and fairly, so you are free to leave. But have one for the road…

She gives him a quick, tingling kiss on the lips before vanishing.

*** *** ***

Later on, as he ventures toward the closest town, he is stopped by a band of orcs and their tamed red spotted leopards. He draws his sword.

Hero: I have no quarrel with you, orc men. Let me be and I’ll… I’ll… O-Oh God…

The orcs stare at the strange man in confusion as he doubles down and falls to his knees, moaning and squirming like a mad man in heat… Then they watch in horror as his pants stain… They flee, believing him to be either ill of body or ill of mind.

Hero: D-DAMN YOU, ENCHANTRESS!

Far away, the enchantress sips a cup of chamomile tea and watches the hero in her crystal orb.

Enchantress: I did tell him it was for the road… Why did he not heed my warning. Tsk tsk.

*** *** ***

[When a woman kisses you and calls it “one for the road” what does that even mean???]

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