Actually The Bear Is A Really Good Case Study On Trauma Being Deemed As Abhorrent When It’s Not Presented

Actually The Bear is a really good case study on trauma being deemed as abhorrent when it’s not presented in a pretty or digestible way within media including how characters who struggle with it are seen as unlovable. Particularly within Carmen’s character and the audience’s response to his behavior in season 3. Let me start this off by saying I’m not trying excuse any of Carmy’s actions throughout s3, I’m just acknowledging that trauma and it’s effects on the traumatized individual as well the effects on people in their life are complex and unpredictable, furthermore, people who haven’t experienced trauma tend to be more judgmental than compassionate towards them. Carmy is no different; him exhibiting this behavior and a certain part of The Bear fanbase choosing to ignore his past or just plain forgetting it and acting he’s like the worst person to have ever existed for having trauma and experiencing many of it’s ugly side effects. I firmly believe that a big part of this reaction is because many people lack nuance in media and an understanding that nothing is ever truly black and white. There are many shades of grey within humanity and The Bear is one of the few pieces of media that does a wonderful job of showing that. It’s glaringly obvious that Carmy has a multitude of issues that need to be addressed before he can run a successful restaurant and maintain healthy relationships. But None of that makes him an irredeemable or horrible person. It makes him a flawed human being that needs help who is also deserving of love and support. Trauma is far from beautiful and I’m tired of people acting like it needs to be portrayed in media in a sanitized way that erases all the hardships that come with it because they feel uncomfortable when they’re shown the gritty, raw, vulnerable truth of what trauma really is; of what it really does to a person. Carmy is no exception, he is struggling with his mental health in a way that is not pretty and wrapped up in a bow and people can’t handle it because we’re being shown the reality of it. He is angry, lashing out, spiraling, handling his emotions the only way he knows how by throwing himself into his work. I won’t deny that he has treated the people in his life poorly and he will need to earn their forgiveness in his own time. Yet none of that makes him any less worthy of love and patience. He needs professional help but he will only reach out when he’s ready too and even then it won’t go away over night. It can take months, and possibly years to truly heal from every thing he’s been through and after all of that he will still have bad days and he will still be just as worthy of love on those days as he is on the good ones. Struggling with trauma will never make anybody underserving of being treated with kindness or compassion and it will never make anyone any less worthy of being loved.

More Posts from Damnikindadontcare and Others

6 months ago

Everyday I think about how Chris Storer wrote Sydcarmy; One of the most achingly beautiful love stories I’ve seen in media in a long time. About two people who were connected long before they met and how they eventually found each other when they needed it the most. Who have continued to build upon their love together and created something beautiful born out of devotion. Who understand each other on a cosmic level, who have made each other better in every way possible. Who were indubitably meant to be partners in every sense of the word. And how Storer very well might throw it all away for one of the most boring, unhealthy, underdeveloped, wonderbread couples who look they could be distant cousins.

Everyday I Think About How Chris Storer Wrote Sydcarmy; One Of The Most Achingly Beautiful Love Stories
Everyday I Think About How Chris Storer Wrote Sydcarmy; One Of The Most Achingly Beautiful Love Stories

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1 year ago

Can’t wait for Sydcarmy to have several incredibly intimate scenes that can only be explained as romantic in s3, so the antis can get mad and Chris Storer can gaslights us


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7 months ago

So you’re going to look me in my EYES and tell ME that he made her the best meal shes EVER had and that dish was an act of defiance against his EC and his HEART on plate in the shape of a HEART and that dish went out to HER and it was the BEST meal she’s ever HAD and then you’re going to LIE to me and say that they’re NOT soulmates


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10 months ago

Crazy how people can watch The Bear and miss one of the most integral parts of the story, Change and all that comes with it; all of the joy, all of the pain, every good and bad moment, the fear of changing and the understanding that change is a necessary part of growth. Richie fighting against the Changing of the neighborhood and restaurant he’s known his whole life to eventually accepting it and finding his purpose through that. Ebra, same as Richie, fighting against change but coming to an understanding that change must come whether it’s welcomed or not. Tina, Syd, and Marcus welcoming the change, tapping into their full potential and becoming the incredibly talented chefs they were meant to be. Carmy being faced with an ultimatum, continue on the way you are, down a destructive path, pushing everyone and everything that you love away, and end up the same way your mother and brother did, or change, accept that you will have to change your way of living in order to move forward in life and let go of the past that you so desperately cling to, to move towards a bright and beautiful future that welcomes you with open arms.


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1 year ago
Sydney Is Better Than Me Cause I Would’ve Called Her Out If She Was Making The Face She Was Making

Sydney is better than me cause I would’ve called her out if she was making the face she was making at me in a second


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1 year ago

the hunger games brain rot is real but not in the sense that i'm having coherent thoughts, in the sense that im rotating all four books in my head like rotisserie chickens 24/7

1 year ago

Seeing people say that Aang should’ve killed Ozai is crazy because we all know Ozai would’ve rather died than lose his bending and by extension his ability to exert control over his people and the rest of the world. Ultimately death would’ve been a mercy, now Ozai has to spend the rest of his of life weak and powerless, rotting away in a jail cell. Also he has to spend the rest of his life knowing he got his ass beat by a 12 year old.


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damnikindadontcare - Hot Take Babe
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