It's Always Been You

“Two of a Kind”

a parent trap inspired au

Summary: You and James Potter were once intertwined, hearts beating for each other, but due to unforeseen circumstances, you decided to break up, taking Harold with you and Harry with him.

Pairings: James Potter x reader

Series Masterlist

chapter i

chapter ii

chapter iii

chapter iv

A trip to 12 Grimmauld Place

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Reader

Request: I saw the trip to diagon alley fic I love the idea of Remus and reader adopting Harry and not telling anyone and also them having their own biological children I was wondering if you could make more like this maybe where their kids are older

Maybe even include some uncle Sirius when he escapes from Azkaban and they visit him at grimmauld place

Warnings: Pregnancy

A/N: Part of the Domestic Bliss universe but can be read alone!

A/N2: How much do you guys want me to mess with canon? I feel that growing up in a loving home (but specifically with Remus) means that Harry would probably be a different person and make different decisions.

Masterlist

"Hurry up, boys." You called up the stairs. "Or your father and I will leave with ought you."

A series of thuds and crashes met your words. But you just fondly rolled your eyes as you got back to packing your bag, ready to go.

"First." A voice shouted before you felt a hand land on your shoulder.

"Oh, come on!" Another voice shouted. "That's not fair."

"You snooze, you lose." The voice closest to you called out.

"Hello, my dear." You laughed. Pressing a kiss to the top of Harry's head.

Then, only a moment later, you heard the sound of thundering feet as your other son, Teddy came charging down the stairs. Hurtling towards you.

Crashing into you, Teddy wrapped his arms around you.

"Hello, my love." you greeted. Pressing a kiss to his forehead, too.

"Are you two muppets ready to leave now?" You questioned them as you picked up your bag.

"Yeah." Harry grinned. Tugging at your arm as, he pulled you into the living room where Remus was waiting. 

Sat in his favourite armchair with a newspaper open on his lap.

When he heard the three of you enter the room, he folded the newspaper. Standing up, he deposited it back on his seat as he walked towards you and the boys.

"Shall we, my lady." Remus teased. Bowing to you in an overexaggerated way.

Laughing, you swatted at his arm as you led your boys out of the house. Make sure to lock the door behind you.

When you got out into the garden you grabbed a hold of Teddy as Remus took Harry.

"Everyone ready?" You called out.

When all your boys replied with sounds of agreement, you and Remus both disappeared with a pop.

Reappearing in a narrow alleyway just down from Grimuld place. 

Momenterly fussing over your boys, you made sure that no one had been spliced before you all walked out of the alleyway.

Harry and Teddy leapt ahead, teasing each other as they ran ahead. Rasing up to number 12. With his longer legs, Teddy ended up making it first. His hand reached for the knocker as he stuck his tongue out at Harry.

The door flew open not even a moment later as Sirues towering frame took over the doorway.

"Well, if it isn't the lupins," Sirius beamed as he took in the sight of your little family. "Come in, come in." He waved as she stepped to the side, allowing you all to come.

The moment the door was safely shut behind the five of you, and you were out of the foyer, Harry and Teddy threw themselves at Sirus.

Who only laughed. Wrapping them up in a great big hug.

"How are my favourite troublemakers?" Sirues questioned them.

Causing them to chatter on to him about there exploits as he momentarily comes over to you and Remus.

"And how are the pair of you?" Sirues questions quickly as he pulls you into a hug. Pressing a kiss to both your cheeks.

"We are good." Remus assured him. As he got pulled into his own hug by Sirues.

"How are you?" You asked Sirues softly.

"Oh I'm good." Sirues waved off your concern. "Same old, same old."

You only fondly smiled at him as Harry and Teddy came up to Sirues. Each grabbing him by an arm as together they pulled him off so they could carry on chatting his ear off about something.

You couldn't quite make out what they were saying, and quite frankly, you weren't sure if you wanted to.

Also, watching the scene from behind you, Remus snorted.

"if we left now, how long do you think it would take for them to notice?" He asked you teasingly.

"Don't say that." You laughed. Gently hitting him in the chest.

Laughing, Remus grabbed the offending hand and brought it to his lips. Dropping a delicate kiss to your knuckles you and Remus finally followed after the chaos that was your children and a certain Sirues black.

You followed the three of them into the living room, where Sirues was sitting in the middle of the sofa. One of your boys on either side as Harry, seemed to be narrating an exciting tale. His hands waving as Teddy and Sires just watched on. Occasionly nodding.

Smiling at the scene, you and Remus sat in the nearby Love seat. Your bodies pressed together as you fondly watched the scene in front of you.

You didn't know what you would do with ought your boys. They really were your whole world.

02: Barbie's Dreamhouse.

Joel Miller x f!bimbo!reader. previous. series masterlist. next.

02. Strawberry Lemonade.

warnings: reader stares at joel a lot and finds him hot as hell, reader is dramatic as hell (might be annoying to some), explicit thoughts, suggestive, sarah is alive and 12 years old here, reader thinks she's a homewrecker, not beta read.

summary: you just can't help but gawk at your hot contractor who's working for free, thank god the view is free too. but a revelation makes you question if you're lusting for a married man.

reader's outfit is the blue one of the dolls from the barbie movie (this one under)

You had settled on the couch on the second-floor balcony with a glass and pitcher of cold lemonade and a few snacks, while Joel was up on the roof, using a ladder to climb up to the edges.

There was no mistaking his experience— he made little noise at all, moving around the structure as if it were just another Tuesday. Despite his hardass appearance, he was a very skilled worker.

He eventually climbed down from the roof and headed inside, taking a second to catch his breath before spotting you upstairs.

He was immediately thrown off by the adorable dress— especially the heart detail. But he knew it was rude to stare, so he did his best to keep his eyes on yours.

"That… was actually a lot quicker than I thought it would be," Joel said, clearly pleased. "I should have the rest of the replacement shingles put on in no time at all…"

"Are they pink?" you giggled.

"They're white but I painted over the roof last time, I'll just paint over em' some other day."

"I got some snacks for us. I tested the fridge and it was working too." you poured him a glass of lemonade. "Here, cool off."

Joel took the drink. The cool liquid was very much appreciated after all of that hard work. He took a few swigs from his glass before he looked you over again.

"Thank you…" He nodded, clearly still unable to tear his eyes away from your dress. "Where'd you stay last night?"

"I found a nearby bed and breakfast beside a gasoline station. At least they didn't question why I was all dirty when I checked in." you giggled. "So, what's next?"

"Hmm… the plumbin'. I’m assuming it hasn’t been fixed." Joel's brow furrowed slightly. “The main shutoff doesn’t work very well, so if there’s a leak, you won’t be able to do anything about it. That’s pretty much a priority.”

"Oh, right. Um... so what do we do?"

"Well, we’ve got to find the shutoff for now," Joel said as he set his drink down. It was clear he hadn’t done much plumbing in his life, but from the times he had worked on it, it was also clear he was quite skillful when it came to repairs.

"Follow me. The main one should be in the basement, from what I remember."

"Alright! Lead the way."

You follow Joel as he headed down the stairs into the basement— it was pretty cluttered down there, with lots of old junk strewn around. As he made his way across the room to the back wall, he grabbed an old flashlight and turned it on.

"Hopefully, the shutoff valve ain't coated in any rust," he muttered. "But if it is, might be tougher than expected…"

Sure enough, he found the right valve, but it was covered in that awful orange rust and was completely stuck. He frowned as he studied it.

"Oh… that ain't good. This could be a problem…"

"Oh no... what do we do?"

He looked at you and shrugged.

"We could apply some WD-40 to it and hope that loosens it up. But that’s a long shot. In all honesty, I think we’re gon' need to hire a professional plumber to come in and see what can be done about this."

"Well, uh..." you trailed off. Joel watched as you fidgeted with your fingers as your body grew stiff.

Joel could tell that you were trying your best not to worry, but he really couldn’t come up with any alternative. As much as he hated to ask, he really didn’t think there was another way around it.

"I'll cover it. Don't worry."

"Thank you, Joel." you put your hands behind your back and smiled cheekily at him.

In the course of the next few weeks, Joel hired workers from an electrician to install the chandelier and fix the wiring, to plumbers to fix the plumbing issue. With his own money, nonetheless.

"Thank you, seriously, Joel..." You stared up at the pink jewels dangling off the chandelier in awe.

Joel chuckled softly and was about to respond, but he paused, realizing just how many times he’s heard those same words in just a few weeks.

"You don't have to thank me so much, you know. This was nothing"

"I mean, giving thanks is always a basic human thing." you smiled and placed both of your hands on your hips. "Appreciation can do amazing things."

There was another pause. He shrugged and smirked. "I mean… are you always this appreciative?" he asked, trying to hide his smile.

"Of course! Why wouldn't I?"

"I dunno, I've just never known anyone who can be this appreciative, you know? It’s definitely not something I'm used to hearing…"

There was another pause as he was contemplating what to say.

"It’s just that… you're never gonna make me feel bad for it or anything, right?"

Your shoulders dropped and you tilted your head to the side. "Why would I?"

He sighed.

"I dunno. It's just that most people I know like to take advantage of or make me feel bad for what I do for them. You know, like always makin' me feel like I should do more just because I'm helpin' in the first place. But you don't ever act like that, and… well, I dunno. I guess I haven't been used to it."

"Why would they do such a thing?" you looked offended, furrowing your brows.

"I've always just been surrounded by assholes. I guess it's what's really normal for me. But with you… I mean, the difference is staggerin', isn't it? I guess I'm just now realizin' just how shitty most people that I've known actually are."

You smiled and walked towards him. "And how many people did you offer to fix their house for free?"

He laughed as he thought about it.

"Never before have I offered something like that. Usually, it's more like helpin' 'em fix their car or somethin' like that. So honestly, this is new territory for both of us. Though, even then, you're still much more appreciative than just about anyone I’ve ever come across."

"But I do promise," you held out your pinky finger with a wide smile. "I will pay you back soon."

For some reason, the pinky finger was funny to him. Maybe it was just that you were so genuinely innocent in your promise, or the contrast between how serious of a situation this could potentially be and you being so playful. He took your pinky finger and wrapped his own around yours. He looked you over.

"Do you swear? Because if you don't, there's about to be hell to pay. I take pinky promises quite seriously."

"That's so fun! I always keep my promises."

"I know you will. So this right here is a sign of a promise. And I trust that you will be able to keep that promise, so I don't need you to repay me right away."

"I promise. Cross my heart, hope to die."

He laughed and nodded, his smile growing as he squeezed slightly harder around your pinky. "Okay then. Just remember, you break this pinky promise, and I won't hesitate to let you know just how disappointed I am."

You let out a giggle after letting go of his pinky "Ooooh, I'm so scared."

He laughed as well.

"I think you should be! I'm not usually one to joke around when it comes to stuff like this." he chuckled again. "But just so you know, even though I'd be pretty angry, I really wouldn't have it in me to stay mad at you. You know that by now, right?"

"Why?" you batted your eyelashes at him "Is it because I'm preeeeetty?"

He was trying really hard to suppress his smile and hold back from laughing.

"It is indeed because I think you are pretty…. But I can't deny the fact that you've also become really good at pushin' out my buttons. Even if I really should be furious 'bout all the money I spent on this house, you make it tough not to just smile back at 'cha and forgive ya."

"I know, I'm sorryyyy..." you clasped your hands together and dramatically knelt down in front of him.

He chuckled. "Well, I really mean it. Your personality is one of the most refreshin' personalities I've ever come across in a long time. And I never would have even met you if it weren't for this house and Mags. That has to count for somethin', right?"

"Sentimental value?"

"Yeah, exactly. It's like the universe knew I needed someone like you in my life. Who knew a house could actually lead to a meaningful relationship… I definitely didn't see that comin'."

"The world works in mysterious ways." you shrugged. "Keep up, old man."

Joel laughed louder. There was something about you calling him an old man that he loved, even though he should be offended.

"Watch it, before you start makin' this old man feel his age. My body is just now startin' to fall apart on me, don't give it a reason to start fallin' apart faster than it already is!"

The both of you laughed. You got up from the floor and fixed your dress "So, is there anything else the house needs?"

Joel thought for a moment, finally coming to the realization that the house was probably good for now. It'd definitely need some more work on the interior in time, but at the least, it was liveable.

"Honestly? No, I don't believe there is. I think this house is good for now. I'll keep doin' my check-ins every few weeks or so to make sure that everythin' is alright with the house, but besides that, there's really nothin' more we need to do here."

"So..." you fiddled with your fingers. "What do we do now?"

Joel shrugged. "I'm not sure. I guess we just have ourselves a nice, long moment of standin' here and being proud of the fact that we've both survived the experience of trying to renovate this damn house. It’s a miracle either of us has our sanity still intact."

He laughed as he leaned up against the wall of the dining room.

"You know, you've spent a lot of time here. I've never even seen the inside of your house." you giggled.

"You know you're not wrong, I was here almost every day for weeks on end." his eyes trailed off as he thought and sighed. "I guess I should invite you over sometime then, right? It's not nearly as interesting as this house, but I'm sure you'd love it."

"My house is pink. Big deal." you rolled your eyes and walked towards him, leaning against the kitchen wall "You know every nook and cranny of my house, of course, I deserve to know yours."

"It's only fair."

"Indeed."

You kept staring at Joel. He had some beads of sweat falling from his scalp to his face, and god did he look hotter than hell. You felt like a Victorian lady seeing an ankle.

"Are you single-" your question got muffled by the sound of the doorbell, and turn your head towards the door "Coming!" you said.

You walked towards the door and swung it open, greeted by a young girl. "Hi, is my dad here?"

Your brows furrowed. "Dad?" who could possibly-

"Sarah," Joel said from behind you. Your head immediately snapped towards him and your eyes widened like a deer in headlights. "Have you met my daughter?" he asked you.

You blinked twice. "I-I don't think I have."

You really had no idea he even was a father... or even considered, married.

Sarah looked around the room in awe, her eyes trailing all across the furniture and her expression changing several times as she looked.

"Did you fix this house all by yourself?" she asked Joel, her eyes wide.

Joel cleared his throat and nodded. "Yeah. I rebuilt this whole house pretty much myself— minus the plumbin' and electrician work, which I had hired some guys for. We still have to go through planning on each room, but it's almost done." he pointed towards you. "She's still thinkin' about what to do with all these rooms."

Sarah's facial expression changed to a small smile as she giggled. She turned her head towards you. "Daddy tells me a lot about you. He says you're so nice. The nicest lady he's ever met. Was it all true?”

You were still in a shocked state but you shook your head a bit and gave her a smile. "Why don't you be the judge of that?"

"You're really pretty..." Sarah stared in awe at you.

"Hey, didn't you say you gotta pick up your Girl Scout cookies today?" Joel looked at his wristwatch. "We gotta hurry if you wanna start sellin' 'em tomorrow."

"Oh, right!"

Joel and Sarah waved goodbye to you as they walked out of your house, and you stood there on your porch questioning everything.

"He's... married?" you closed the front door and walked up the stairs, slowly and dramatically. You tried to think of the signs that he was married. Ring? You didn't even notice! Well, not counting the times you stared at his large fingers and imagined them inside of you...

"Oh, god..." the realization hit you. You entered the main bedroom and you fell to your knees. "I'm a homewrecker!" you cried out.

tags: @danaispunk @buckybarnessweetheart @skysmiller @joelsflannel @sweetenerobert @clownd1ck @jhiddles03 @schwytie @femmeanonymelives @redemie @pedropascal-whore @hello-shirousa @survivingandenduring @sk-e-le-ton-s @urbrazysimp @amyispxnk @clownd1ck @livingdeadmaria @joeldjarin @blood-suckerxoxo @reallylovereading

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don't blame me | j.potter [part one]

𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 : I decided to rewrite this one as I had a pretty good plot in mind going - but kinda fumbled it with the following part and I didn't like the original direction I took it so I've decided to rewrite this one and give a better plot line :>

𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀/𝗌 : 𝖺𝗋𝗋𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗋𝗂𝖺𝗀𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗉𝖾, 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍, 𝗆𝗎𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅 𝗁𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀, 𝗋𝖺𝗏𝖾𝗇𝖼𝗅𝖺𝗐 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋, 𝗅𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗎𝖺𝗀𝖾, 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗊𝗎𝗂𝗇𝗍, 𝗃𝗉 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺 𝗍𝗈𝗌𝗌𝖾𝗋 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗇𝗈𝗌𝖾 𝖿𝗅𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒 𝟧 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗌.

𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗍𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺 𝖻𝗂𝗀 𝗍𝗎𝗋𝗇 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗌𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗏𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝖾𝗇𝗀𝖺𝗀𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖩𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌 𝖯𝗈𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗋 - 𝗁𝖾'𝗌 𝖺𝗌 𝖽𝗂𝗌𝗍𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝗈𝗅𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝗈𝖾𝗌𝗇'𝗍 𝗎𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗁𝗒 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖽𝗈𝗇'𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗆 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖻𝗂𝗍. 𝖲𝗈 𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝖺𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝗂𝗍 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗌𝗈𝗇𝖺𝗅 𝗆𝗂𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗈 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝗒. 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌 : 𝟦𝗄

Your life has been pretty normal up until the summer of 1977 when you found out that you have been engaged to someone for most of your life and you never knew until your parents dressed you up and dragged you all the way to the Potter Manor for a dinner party.

You remembered that night very well and desperately wish you didn't because it gives you a headache every time you recall the unfortunate chain of events that leads to you now, attending school with your fiancé whose guts you hated.

"Here we are," your Father announced, stepping out of the fireplace where you three floo'd in and reached his hand out to your Mother who accepted. "That was a smooth trip."

You bite the inside of your cheeks and stepped out as well, running your hand through the skirt of your dress - wondering why you're all dressed up and having dinner with the Potters out of nowhere. 

Your families have been friends for many generations but you were certain you're not carrying on that tradition - specially when James Potter was one annoying bloke who made a point to be so eccentric and a menace every day he spends at Hogwarts.

Not to mention the whole pining for Evans, what a nuisance. No one cares about his stupid crush, so there was no need to announce every bloody morning! He's so full of himself that he really thinks he's some main character in a novel, prancing around being all charming.

Euphemia and Fleamont Potter came into view,  greeting your family warmly, and you look around - you haven't been here in a while. The last time you were here was back when you were 11 and very eager to go to Hogwarts.

"Lovely to see you again, dear." Mia greeted you, giving you a hug which you awkwardly returned by patting her back and you stepped back - spying James come into the living room and you raise a brow.

He dressed up as well, all pampered-looking in a suit and his messy hair looks a bit on the tame side this evening. He caught you staring and frowned at you, you only rolled your eyes at him and turned to your parents and his striking up a conversation.

"Well, no need to stand here - come to the dining room," Fleamont gestured to the hallway. "We've prepared lots."

"You really didn't have to." Your Mum chuckled, but began following them anyway. 

"Nonsense! Anything for such important guests."

The adults left the room and you cross your arms, turning back to James. "You actually look decent, congrats." you tell him, despite yourself.

He frowns at that - he recognizes you. He's sure he's known you before Hogwarts but that was only because your family and his got along well, and that was it. You never interacted at Hogwarts. He has no idea why you dislike him so.

He thought he was very likable.

"Thank you?" 

You began walking away, heading towards the voices of the adults chatting in the dining room and you entered - making them all turn to you and James was right behind you, you can only feel nervous when you see the look your Mother had on her face, seeing you with James.

You take a seat at the table and the night progressed normally. You had dinner and the adults engaged themselves in random conversations about the wizarding world while you and James stayed quiet.

He was mostly busy trying to figure out why you seem to dislike him, and he keeps coming up blank. While you tried your hardest to remain civil and not tell him off for staring at you the entire time, looking so conflicted.

"Now that dinner's out of the way, it's time we actually discuss the reason we're all here today." Fleamont announced, making you turn to him.

"You're right, it's time." Your Father agreed, lightly dabbing his lips with a napkin.

"Dad? What's going on?" You ask, frowning at your Mum who only smiled at you.

"Yeah, what's up?" James asked. 

"Well, you only have one year left at Hogwarts - so we thought it's finally time to discuss the wedding."

You felt your hand grow colder and the hairs at the back of your neck stand, you struggled to speak and was glad James took over that for you. This can't be happening.

"What wedding?"

"Yours, of course. You two have been engaged for quite a long time," Mia clapped her hands excitedly. "We thought it was time to discuss."

"What?" You choked out.

"Oh don't you worry, dear. There's no rush, we only want to start preparing to make sure everything goes well and you two have the best wedding."

You blink, unable to form a proper sentence, and didn't notice how all the feelings left your arms when you dropped your fork and it clanked loudly against your plate. James was watching you - realizing you also had no idea.

"We're engaged?" James asked. "Since when?"

"Did you forget?" Fleamont asked his son,  a deep frown on his wrinkled face.

"You proposed when you were ten," Mia answered for him. "I could never forget the way you got down on one knee and offered a flower to _____ here."

You felt your chest burn and your vision began blurring, this is all too much and definitely not what you expected. You couldn't even make this up in your literal nightmares. How does one even act in this situation?

"I proposed when I was ten and you think - I still want to marry her?" James was stunned beyond all reasons, he couldn't even process it entirely. He knew his parents were a bit much but he didn't think they'd be able to pull this off.

"It was in your oath, was it not?" Mia frowned. "I do recall your little speech about not looking at any other girl for the rest of your life."

Despite the horror that is your engagement to James Potter - in your very shaken state, you feel the tension release from your shoulders and you began laughing. Laughing at the irony of it all, some oath that was!

You've been engaged for most your life and never knew because you never thought your parents and his would take that seriously? Specially when it was made 7 years ago and one of his oaths was to never look at another girl - when he's spent all his years in Hogwarts pining for one redhead.

You remembered. Unlike him, you kept that promise in mind - but not once in your wildest dreams could you have predicted this outcome

Everyone at the table was too stunned by your reaction, none of them able to say or do anything except James when he saw the tears brimming in your eyes. Aside the laughter, you were about to cry both from frustration and from laughing too hard.

He got up, chair scraping against the polished floor, and went around the table to assist you, pulling the chair out for you and ushering you away from the dining table. Your laughter died down as James got up to go around the table to escort you off your seat.

"I'll calm her down," he nods at the adults and began steering you away from their prying eyes. "We'll be in my room."

You let him guide you down the halls, you still had tears in your cheeks and you quickly wipe them away - feeling embarrassed and stayed quiet as you enter his room. He gestured for you to take a seat on his bed and you did.

Looking around to find his room to be surprisingly organized. Barely any posters on the wall, just a framed poster of his favourite Quidditch team, bookshelves lining the walls and his bed was a bright red and gold.

"Feeling better?" He asked, shrugging his coat off and throwing it over the chair next to a bookshelf. Throwing a look over his shoulder to watch you sit stiffly on his bed.

"No." You answer, fiddling with your fingers on your lap. "What the bloody hell was that?"

"I could have asked you the same thing." 

"Not my breakdown - the engagement."

He paused, turning to you and seeing how shaken up you still are over the whole thing, and he felt bad. He admits he was taken aback by the entire thing as well, but given your treatment of him earlier, he could sense that you weren't too fond of him.

And now you found out you're engaged to him.

"I have no idea, if I'm being honest." James shook his head - about to ask you something when a knock on his door made him look away from you. He walked over and opened it, Sirius Black is standing outside with a grin.

"What did I miss?" He asked, peering through his shoulders and his jaw going slack when he saw a figure of a girl on James' bed and audibly gasped. 

James shrugged and opened the door wider, allowing Sirius to enter his room and shut the door closed behind him. Sirius took slow and careful steps, slowly drinking in your appearance and frowning when he recognized you.

"Meet my fiancée, mate." James threw his hand to gesture to you lazily and you scoff at him.

"What? Fian - what?" Sirius exchanged glances between you two and could feel his thoughts spiral from confusion. "Are you two messing with me?"

You groan into your palms. "I wish."

"I don't understand."

"How about you take a seat first, mate?" James offered and you watched as he settled on the beanbag chair.

It was no secret that Sirius Black ran away from home and has been living with the Potters who warmly welcomed him into their family. You did feel pity for the boy, he was too young to be going through something so difficult and you can't say you understood his struggles.

You didn't have the world's greatest parents but they weren't abusive, just terrible at providing a child the emotional support they needed. They were too caught up with work that they forgot a child didn't just need clothes, food on the table and a house to live in.

You do admire their friendship - something you can't relate to. You have friends from your house but you can't say you've formed a bond with anyone similar to the one Sirius Black and James Potter has.

It was almost disgusting how close these two are - their personalities fit so well and they look damn good next to each other. Still, you have a lingering distate for Sirius Black and his. . .endeavours all around the castle that never failed to reach your ears.

But even if you didn't hear about it - you'll see it. Down the halls, during meals and even while you did your rounds. 

It's probably bad etiquette of you as a Prefect but you really don't bother with him at all. The moment you spy that long black hair in the dark halls after curfew - you just turn the other direction and go about your night, forgetting you even saw it.

Sparing yourself the awkwardness of it all. You didn't exactly fancy interrupting students making out - they always glare like you just deprived them of their greatest plasure and it's just overall disturbing to stand there, waiting for them to fix their appearances and then having to escort them back to their dorms.

You'll leave that job to the others.

After letting James explain the whole situation to Black who just got back from Lupin's - you three sat down in his room in silence. No one knowing what to do. Because what do you even do after finding out you've basically been engaged to someone all your life?

And your parents are expecting to plan a wedding before you even graduate from school?

You sat on James' bed while he and Sirius occupied the bean bag chairs and talked amongst themselves. You felt too out of it to join their conversation and only listened in, occasionally making a comment.

"How about Evans, then?"

"What about her?" You ask, allowing yourself to fall backwards and land on the soft bed with a quiet thud, your hair sprawling on his bright red sheets and James frowned at you from where he sat.

He didn't exactly expect you to grow comfortable in his room - given how you acted towards him earlier.

"Well - Prongs here has been in love with her," Sirius points. "And-"

"Blood hell, I know that," you yelled, interrupting him and made the two boys jump from your sudden outburst. "I went to school with you for years, I bloody well know he's in love with her. He practically announce it every damn day!"

The two boys were stunned, growing silent as they watch you and you only stare at the ceiling, feeling your irritation travel up and down your spine.

"What I'm asking is why should she be in the discussing when we're talking about my future here," you roll to your side and raise a brow at them. "Who cares about Evans right now? I'm bloody engaged to - that."

James abruptly stood up, walking over to the bed and looking down at you with a conflicted expression on his face. "Do you have a problem with me?"

You roll on your back again and prop yourself up to look him up and down. And he has to admit that the way you treat him was starting to grind his gears, he can't recall ever offending you intentionally or not.

He knows their pranks often get out of hand and innocent bystanders are affected but you didn't stand otu at all so he must've never ran into you while at Hogwarts but for some reasons - you don't like him.

And everyone likes him - except, Slytherins, but that's it.

He's practically the golden boy. Pureblood, rich, good-looking, has great friends and has amazing skills as a wizard.

What did he ever do to you?

"Yeah, do you have a problem with him?"

"Piss off, Black." You said through gritted though you kept your eyes on James.

"Have I offended you somehow?" He asks and you raised a brow.

Merlin, he hates this. You're looking at him like he's the most offensive thing you've ever seen in your life, and it's making his skin crawl. How were you two childhood friends again?

"I don't know, Potter. Have you?"

He's growing frustrated and you are not helping ease him into the situation.

"I'm pretty sure my mate here asked you politely."

You get up from the bed, crossing your arms and switching your glare to Black, who also stood up and is staring you down. You flash him a sarcastic smirk.

"I heard him, there's really no need to sit him on your lap and act as his caregiver - " You roll your eyes and stood your ground despite the sight of an angry Sirius Black taking a step forward. James reached his arm out to stop Sirius. "Control your guard dog, Potter."

"Merlin, what is with you?" James asked exasperatedly.

You turn back to him and see the brewing anger in those hazel eyes through the rim of his glasses and smile, one that was void of any happiness of any form.

"There it is, good. Keeping disliking me, will make this whole ordeal worse for me, and I can have a valid argument to back out of this engagement." You begin heading for the door and turn the knob. "After all, who would want to marry someone they hate?"

You shut the door closed after you, and the two Gryffindors are left stunned, standing in the bedroom. Left to exchange confused stares and the awkward silence that followed was almost deafening.

Boarding the train back to Hogwarts - you can only roll your eyes at the list of Prefects you had in your hand. James Potter got Headboy instead of Lupin, and it was the stupidest news you've received, right under the engagement.

You didn't have it in you to argue with your parents, so you were leaving that up to James. He's the golden boy, spoiled rotten by his parents, so surely he can get you both out of this while you lived your life as if it never happened.

You sat in the Prefects' carriage waiting for everyone else, the only ones already present is some Slytherin Prefect whose name you didn't know, so you kept quiet, reading the list and rolling your eyes at Lily Evans getting Headgirl.

Dumbledore did this on purpose.

You kept your eyes on the parchment, scanning names, even as a few more students entered the carriage and you felt someone sit next to you. You swiftly flickered your gaze to spot the bold colour of red on their robe.

"I was looking for you all over the train." You turn your head to find James Potter sitting next to you, on the Prefects carriage - Lupin right beside him watching the exchange.

"And why would that be?" You frown at him, shaking your head lightly before turning back to the parchment and found your counterpart as a seventh-year Prefect will be Oliver Klove. You're not close, but he's really smart and he performs well in class - should be fine to do rounds with him.

"We didn't get to finish our talk - and you didn't respond to my letters." You could almost hear a pout at the end of that sentence.

"Take a hint then." You shrug lightly and rolled the parchment up, tucking it inside the pocket in your robes right next to your wand and keeping your eyes ahead as the door opened - there walked in Lily Evans in all her glory.

Wearing her uniform properly and despite it looking like everyone else's, she carried it like it was her own and her beautiful red hair swayed as she walked in and took a seat next to a Hufflepuff Prefect. Her curious stares pointed at James next to you did not go unnoticed.

Her eyes skimmed your figure as well but she must've quickly registered that you were watching her as well when she fixed her posture and turned to chatting with the Hufflepuff next to her.

"I get you don't like me but we still have to talk about our bloody en - "

"Okay," you interrupt him. "But let's not talk here, after dinner - I'll be waiting in the Astronomy Tower."

With that, he was satisfied, and he kept his mouth shut until the carriage was full and it was time for both Headgirl and Headboy to commence the orientation. Welcoming fifth-year Prefects who are new to the Prefect duties and addressing the rest.

As expected, Evans was flawless. Establishing her authority but remained a friendly figure, all the while handing off the schedule of rounds, and Potter didn't do too bad next to her. They looked like the picture-perfect couple in their matching robes and with them both being gorgeous people.

James handed you your rounds schedule and you sucked in an exasperated breath through gritted teeth - all your rounds were paired up with his. You lift your gaze from the schedule and spy him adorning a smirk as he went around handing off the others' schedules.

This bloody arse.

Dinner was uneventful - Dumbledore delivered his usual speech, congratulating Gryffindor for producing this year's Headgirl and Headboy and you can only roll your eyes at the obvious favouritism.

You ate dinner quietly despite the bustling great hall. Friends catching up about their summers and discussing Christmas plans, you chose not to partake. Your mind was occupied with the thoughts of James Potter.

You're meeting him in the tower later, and you have no idea what to tell him. How do you even explain all your thoughts and feelings about him in a way that he'd understand and in a way that won't embarrass you?

You actually think you'd rather die than admit the truth as to why you seem vexed by his existence.

Dinner finally ended - you make your way around the castle, carefully making your way around and finally reaching your destination. You expected to wait for him so you brought a book to keep you occupied but you spied him on top of the stairs as you made your way up.

Once reaching the top, you walked past him and quietly addressed him with your gaze before speaking.

"Potter."

Merlin, he really feels weird around you. And he can't tell if it's in a good way or a bad way - you talk to him as if he's some mild inconvenience you couldn't shake off but still disliked nonetheless. As if he was a tiny rock inside your shoe that you could feel with every step, but also barely there to bring absolute discomfort.

He's never been treated this way. It's either he was greatly liked (his friends, fellow Gryffindor and fangirls) or greatly disliked (Evans, Slytherins and otherer purists not agreeing with his tolerance for muggleborns and half-bloods).

You were in between, but leaning more on the dislike side, and he doesn't know what to make of it. You sparked something in him and he couldn't just shrug it off, he needs to know just why you have an evident frown every time you look at him.

"_____." He greeted back.

"I didn't read any of your letters, so I have no idea what you want to talk about," you admit with a shrug. "Why did you mess with my rounds?"

James leaned against the wall coolly, crossing his arms and flashing that infamous smirk on his face. "I don't know whatever you mean."

Annoying you further will probably not help his case but he couldn't help it. He oddly feels excited when you dismiss him with that incredulous look on your face and the look of distaste painting your features.

It was very much unlike with Evans - when it would genuinely hurt every time she rejected his advances, but you seemed fun to him.

He's unfamiliar with all this so he's willing to explore, how convenient is it that you're engaged so there's no escaping him?

You deadpan at him, trying to read that stupid expression on his face to understand the current your situation you're in, but ultimately got nothing. James Potter was a hard act to follow, actually - his entire squad is.

You'd rather decipher ancient runes all day than try and figure out just what is going on inside the mind of a Marauder.

"There's no way Evans would agree to that, did you falsify my rounds?" You ask, raising a brow and he dramatically scoffed in offence.

"My, what a bold accusation," James tilted his head slightly to the side. "Actually, she agreed."

"She did?"

"Gave her an offer she couldn't refuse."

"What could you possibly offer Evans that she'd want?" You ask, chuckling and stepping forward to level gazes with him.

He wasn't backing down, however. He pushed himself off the wall with his feet and stepped forward, looking down at you with a glint of challenge in his eyes that appeared a dark brown in the little light the Astronomy Tower offered.

"I offered her peace," James grinned. "Promised to leave her alone until the Christmas break if she matched our rounds."

Your jaw went slack at his words - your brain almost short-circuiting and it enticed him to know that caught you off guard. You parted your lips but no words came out and he could take a picture to live in this moment forever.

He's been thinking of so many ways all summer to get back at you. You ignored all his letters and avoided him on the train like he expected - this was a good enough payback for that, he revelled in your stunned expression until you recovered and regained your composure.

"Why sacrifice such a sacred tradition?" You ask, voice laced with distaste and sarcasm.

"And here I thought my fiancée would like it better if I stopped pining for another girl."

He didn't expect that to strike a chord in you. You stepped back, feeling your chest burn from both the pain and the anger bubbling inside you, and sent a harsh glare his way.

"I am not your fiancée, don't ever call me that again."

He could tell you were genuinely upset now, but still it didn't stop him. He still found it in himself to close the distance between you two and raise a brow.

"Sure thing, Wife."

to be continued . . .

part two | masterlist

˗ˏˋ ★ ──── 1 TO 100 ‼

「 “ 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘵. ” 」

eventual james potter x fem!reader; inevitable angst and annoyance as james slowly matures over his time at hogwarts. slowburn.

2.7K | FIRST YEAR.

5.8K | SECOND YEAR.

2.7K | THIRD YEAR.

6.0K | FOURTH YEAR.

6.4K | FIFTH YEAR.

SIXTH YEAR.

SEVENTH YEAR.

I love Britain 🇬🇧

Harry and Andrew Garfield at the Valentino show in Paris - 29/09

i don't WANT to read smut right now

i WANT to read a passionate, poetic, jaw dropping, tears streaking down my face, heart wrenching, giggle inducing, feet kicking, cringy yet amazing, gorgeous story written by someone who apologizes for english not being their first language(they're the best writers ever) which has 4 chapters and then makes me scream because it hasnt been updated in months and the author is mia

You’re Losing Me Part 14

𝖲𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖩𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌 𝖯𝗈𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖺 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗇𝗈 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋, 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗎𝗇𝖻𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝖻𝗈𝗇𝖽…𝗈𝗋 𝗌𝗈 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁𝗍. 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖺𝗁𝖺𝗄𝗂, 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗉𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗐𝖺𝗒 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝖩𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗇𝗈 𝗆𝖺𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖽 𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗌, 𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝖺𝗇’𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗆 𝗍𝗈 𝖽𝗈 𝖺𝗇𝗒𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍. 𝖶𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗉𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗎𝗅𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖺𝗍𝖾 𝗍𝖾𝗌𝗍, 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗐𝖺𝗒 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝗍𝗈 𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋? 𝖮𝗋 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝖩𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌 𝗅𝗈𝗌𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗀𝗈𝗈𝖽?

A/N: this is a hanahaki au. WC: 3.9k

Remus sits in a booth, anxiously tapping the tabletop with a butter knife as he waits. The boys had kept him back for too long. At least that’s what he thought. Between trying to find a decent outfit and listening to James’ ridiculous plan, Remus was sure he’d be late; running all the way here to not keep you waiting. Funnily enough, now here he sits, waiting for you to join him.

“Ready to order?” The waitress asks pointedly as she approaches the table.

“Sorry.” He apologizes, setting down the cutlery with a sheepish smile.

“So?” She asks again, this time with a smile. “Ready to order?”

“I’m actually waiting for-“

“Moons!”

Remus’ head whips up at the sound of your voice and when he sees you standing at the entrance, he completely forgets about the person right in front of him.

“Hey.” He breathes, though you’re nowhere near close enough to hear him- something the waitress finds incredibly amusing. She looks between the two of you with a curious gaze.

“I’ll just…give you a minute…” She says- mostly to herself- before turning around and hurrying towards the kitchen.

“Hey. Sorry I’m late,” You apologize once you reach the booth.

“You’re not.” Remus assures you. “I got here early.”

“I had to talk to McGonagall about the classes I dropped-“

“It’s fine.”

“And then I went to meet with Kettleburn to see if he’d still allow me to do my apprenticeship with him-“

“No worries.”

“And for some reason everybody wanted to stop me on the way here to say hi? And like, yeah it’s nice but-“

“You look lovely.” Remus says casually, effectively stopping your rambling.

You freeze, cutting yourself off mid sentence before looking up at Remus with a confused smile.

“Just for the record.” He adds.

“Shut up.” You mumble, laughing nervously.

“No, really.” Remus insists with a nod.

You continue to stare at him skeptically.

“I especially love your jumper.” He comments, eyeing said garment teasingly while he takes a sip of his water.

You roll your eyes with an amused huff.

“You mean your jumper?”

“Is that where I know it from?” Remus asks, pretending as if the information shocked him.

“Do you want it back?” You ask with a guilty smile, already starting to pull one of your arms through the sleeve. After all, it is long overdue. You’d had it for over a month now.

“Not a chance.” Remus refuses, reaching over and placing his hand upon yours.

Your smile drops as you stare at Remus’s hand now sitting atop yours. Your gaze slowly rises and you swallow nervously when you lock eyes with him. The playfulness of it all gone as you hold his stare, unable to look away.

“It looks better on you.” He adds softly, causing your cheeks to warm.

“I brought some appetizers!” The waitress announces, setting the platter down with a proud smile. “On the house, of course.”

Remus pulls his hand away and you clear your throat, avoiding his gaze as you readjust the jumper. The waitress looks between you curiously.

“I didn't interrupt anything, did I?” She asks cautiously.

“No.” You tell her at the same time that Remus says “Yes.”

You look at Remus with wide eyes before turning to stare at the waitress, no doubt looking just as shocked as you feel. She’d have laughed at your expression if she didn’t find you two stumbling over your words so endearing.

“Right. Well…enjoy!” She smiles knowingly, walking away before either of you can even thank her.

You and Remus exchange a shy grin before digging into the food.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“Sorry again for being late.” You apologize with a frown, dipping some fries into the pile of ketchup and taking a bite. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long…”

“Waiting for you has never been a problem before.” Remus hums absentmindedly, picking up a chicken wing and taking a huge bite. “Don’t see why it would be now.”

Choosing to ignore the somersault your heart just did at his confession, you smile appreciatively at Remus only to let out a startled laugh when you look at him.

“What?” He asks, mouth still full of food.

“You have barbecue sauce on your face.” You inform him in between giggles.

Remus grabs a napkin and wipes the side of his mouth before looking to you for approval.

“It’s still there.” You tell him with a shake of your head.

Remus frowns and wipes his face again.

“Did I get it?”

“Not even close…”

“For fucks-“ He aggressively wipes his face a third time. “Good?”

“Give me that.” You huff, stealing the napkin out of his hand. “Come here.”

Remus leans forward and you gently grab hold of his chin as you wipe the napkin across the right side of his mouth.

“Honestly, Moony.” You scold teasingly. “If the napkin came back clean the first time around, why would you continue to wipe the same spot?”

“Make fun all you want, love. From where I’m standing it looks like I won.”

“Oh yeah?” You ask, playfully narrowing your eyes at him. “How so?”

“Mm-mm.” He shrugs casually before smiling at you. “But I am quite comfortable.”

It’s only then that you realize you’re still gingerly holding his chin, with his face mere inches from yours. You see his eyes drop to your lips and that’s when you seem to finally snap out of it, pulling away abruptly to put some space between the two of you.

“Here.” You hand him back the napkin, avoiding eye contact as you do. “Try not to make a mess this time.”

“Yes ma’am.” He nods, chuckling at the offended look you give him.

You playfully stick your tongue out at him and Remus points at something over your shoulder, taking a few of your fries when your back is turned.

“Hey!” You whine when you realize that he’d simply tricked you.

“Oh, did you want them?” Remus asks cluelessly after having shoved the fries into his mouth.

“No…” You shake your head, leaning back in your seat before adding, “…tosser.”

Remus throws his head back in laughter before looking at you with a fond smile.

“Missed you.” He confesses. And it’s true; he had. It had been so long since you’d been your playful self, he almost forgot how much he loved it. Almost.

“Missed you too.” You return. “That’s why I asked you to ditch.”

“Oh yeah?” He asks, taking a large gulp of his drink.

“Yeah.” You confirm with a nod, as you shyly avoid his gaze. “I know how important class is to you but I was really hoping you would say yes…”

“As if I could ever say no to you.” Remus scoffs.

“Careful Moony. You keep saying things like that I might just go ahead and fall in love with you.” You tease, schooling your features even though your face feels as if it’s on fire.

“Is that supposed to scare me?” Remus asks with a raised brow.

You simply grin at him before picking up another fry and dipping it in the mountain of ketchup.

“So how are you?” He asks.

“Fine.” You shrug, dipping the fry back into the ketchup absentmindedly. “Better than fine, actually.”

“You’re not in any pain?” Remus asks worriedly. “Or shortness of breath? Or coughing up flowers?”

“No. No. And no.” You answer, still dunking the fry into ketchup.

“That’s great.”

“Yeah…” You hum, fry now limp and soggy from the amount of ketchup it’s drenched in.

“But?” Remus asks, reaching over and gently grasping your wrist, stopping you from dunking the poor sliver of potato even more.

Finally realizing what you’ve been doing, you grimace at the fry before setting it back down on the plate and wiping your hands with a napkin.

“Do you think I made a mistake?” You ask softly, staring at him with wide eyes, anxious to hear his thoughts.

Remus takes a deep breath before crossing his arms and sitting back in his seat.

“Do you think you made a mistake?”

“No.” You answer immediately. “I mean, you saw me.” You remind him with a frown. “I was at death’s door. This was the best option for me. For my health. My- my chance at living!”

“Then what’s the problem?” Remus asks with a frown of his own.

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “I just… I feel off…”

“Off how?” He asks, voice filled with concern.

“I-I feel like something is missing...”

“Like…the guy…” Remus stutters nervously, sitting up in his seat. “The uh- the one who caused your hanahaki?”

“No.” You shake your head. “I knew I would forget him. I was fine with that. I am fine with that. This is something else. I don’t know what. But I know something is missing. My brain is too…quiet…”

“Quiet? Hmm… Do you think they did the surgery wrong? Did you forget more than you should have?”

“I don’t know!” You groan in frustration before letting out a long sigh. “I don’t know… Everyone worth remembering, I remember.”

“Okay…” Remus nods. “That’s good!”

You look up at him and he’s surprised to see your eyes filled with tears.

“But I feel… empty… and I don’t know why…”

“You’re crying…” Remus says softly.

“I am?” You ask, wiping under your eye and frowning when your fingertip comes back wet. “Fuck.”

Remus hands you a napkin and you take it with a grateful smile, sniffling as you dab your eyes.

“See?” You ask, balling up the napkin and tossing it on the table before pointing at your eyes. “What is this?! Why is this happening!?”

“When was your last period?” Remus asks curiously.

You glare at him and he immediately hurries to explain himself.

“PMS is a thing, Y/N! You know better than I do. Could it be that?” He suggests.

“I am not discussing my monthlies with you.” You tell him matter-of-factly. “…But it’s not that.”

“Okay.” Remus relents, holding his hands up in surrender. “Sorry I brought it up.”

“What if your emotions are trying to get regulated?” He offers instead.

“Do you think that’s possible?” You ask skeptically.

“Considering that hanahaki was thought to be eradicated this whole time and somehow you got it, I’d say pretty much anything is possible.” Remus shrugs.

“Lucky me.” You tell him, voice dripping with sarcasm.

Remus smiles sympathetically at you.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“Hey Y/N?” Remus calls as you both start walking back to the castle.

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

You contemplate it for a moment before eventually nodding.

“Sure.”

“Why did you ask me to Hogsmeade today?” Remus asks, eyes fixed on the ground as he walks. “I mean, without the guys.”

“Well, because I missed you…” You tell him with a nervous chuckle. “I thought that was obvious.”

“I missed you too.” He nods. “But so did Pads and Wormtail and Pr-“ He stops, cutting himself off before he could mention James.

“Well yeah,” You agree. “But that’s different.”

“How?” Remus asks curiously.

His curiosity only grows when you smile knowingly at him before facing forward and skipping ahead, leaving him behind.

“It just is.” You call over your shoulder at him with a giggle.

Remus looks at you curiously but chooses to let it go for now, hurrying to catch up with you. The last thing he wants to do is overwhelm you, so he’ll give you some time before asking all the questions plaguing his mind.

Upon entering the common room, he walks you to the staircase that leads up to the girl’s dormitories.

“Thanks for hanging out with me, Moony.” You smile at him.

“Yeah of course, love.” Remus nods with a smile of his own. “Any time.”

You gaze at him for a moment, as if you’re contemplating something before finally, taking a step closer to him. Remus watches with bated breath as you get on your tiptoes and press your lips to his cheek in a chaste kiss. Remus stands frozen, staring wide eyed at you while you take a step back, staring back at him with a shy grin.

“Okay…good night…” You tell him, turning around.

Before he even knows what he’s doing, Remus has reached forward and grabbed your wrist, stopping you from going any further. You look up at Remus in confusion, wondering what he’s doing.

“Are you sure you don’t remember him?” He asks suddenly, anxiously.

“Who?”

“Ja- the guy. The one who caused your hanahaki.” Remus stutters. “You don’t remember him? At all?”

You furrow your brows in concentration before eventually shaking your head.

“I just remember you.” You tell him with a confused smile, wondering why he’s suddenly bringing him up.

Remus continues to stare at you wordlessly, causing your confusion to grow.

“Why do you ask?” You finally ask him, head tilting to the side curiously as you watch him.

“It’s nothing.” Remus mumbles, shaking his head as he lets go of your wrist. “Sorry. Get some rest, love. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Okay.” You nod, waving at Remus a final time before turning around and hurrying up the stairs. “Good night.”

Remus watches you climb the stairs and turn down the hall, surely going to your dorm. As soon as you’re out of sight, Remus leans against the wall, running a hand down his face.

“What are you doing, Moony?” He asks himself before finally making his way to his own dorm.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

The moment Remus exits the bathroom, James is standing right in front of him. Remus raises a brow but when James continues to silently stare at him, he walks around him to finish getting dressed.

“So?” James finally asks, following him.

“So what?” Remus asks as he ties his shoelaces.

“So how’d it go last night?”

Remus freezes, smiling softly to himself before shaking his head.

“It was fine.” He shrugs, standing up and quickly fixing his duvet.

“That’s it?” James asks with a frown, following after Remus as he crosses the room to get his backpack. “Just fine?”

“Yeah.” Remus nods, making sure he has everything he needs before closing his bag.

“What’d you guys talk about?” James continues to interrogate as they make their way out of the dorm and towards the Great Hall.

“Prongs…” Remus sighs.

“What? I can ask, can't I?” James defends. “I’m not doing it to be malicious. I’m asking as a concerned friend-“

“She doesn’t see you as a friend anymore, mate.” Sirius interrupts with a grimace.

“-who is trying to get back the woman he loves.” James continues, acting as if he hadn’t heard Sirius- though the flicker of pain in his eyes says otherwise. “So? What’d you guys talk about?”

“I don’t know, Prongs. Lots of things!” Remus shrugs.

“Yeah. But what exactly?”

“I can’t tell you.” He shakes his head.

“Why not?” James frowns.

“I just- I don’t know… Some of the things were quite personal. They were about her hanahaki and her surgery. I don’t wanna put her business out there…”

“So you’re keeping secrets?” James asks curtly. “Again.”

“I’m respecting her privacy.” Remus responds with a frown.

“Sounds like you’re keeping secrets.” James mumbles to himself.

“You can call it whatever you want.” Remus sighs. “But I already told you that I wasn’t gonna spy on her.”

“He’s right, mate.” Sirius agrees. “You shouldn’t put Moony in the middle of all this. I mean… even more than he already is.”

“It’s not spying!” James argues. “It’s simply talking to her and then sharing everything that she said with me!”

“That’s spying, idiot!” Sirius shouts.

“No it’s not.” James frowns.

“That’s literally the definition of it, Prongs.” Sirius groans.

“Okay, guys-“ Peter interjects with a nervous laugh.

“Alright, fine, whatever. Did she say anything about me?” James asks instead, borderline begging Remus to give him something, anything, even the smallest sliver of hope.

“Just that she doesn’t remember you. Like at all…” Remus tells him, smiling sympathetically. “Sorry Prongs. I specifically asked her… There’s nothing there. She- she doesn’t remember anything about you…”

“Oh…” James mumbles, staring at the ground as he walks. “Well, that’s okay…”

“It is?” Remus, Peter, and Sirius all ask at the same time.

“Yeah.” James nods, looking at his friends with a determined smile. “It’s fine that she doesn’t remember me. It’s brilliant, actually. That means we can start all over again. I can do things right this time.”

“How’re you gonna do that?” Peter asks as they finally reach the Great Hall.

“Simple. I’ll just turn on the good ol’ Potter charm.” He winks before heading towards the Gryffindor table.

“Yeah, because that’s worked out so well for him in the past.” Sirius comments sarcastically.

“I don’t buy the whole optimistically positive thing. So how’s he really doing?” Remus asks Sirius worriedly.

“Oh, you know…” Sirius trails off before sighing. “He missed lunch yesterday. And dinner.”

Remus and Peter nod with a frown.

“I finally found him in the locker rooms, and it was completely trashed… Chairs thrown across the room, pictures of past teams shattered, his broom was broken in two…”

“Merlin’s beard…” Peter curses.

“When I finally got him to stop, he broke down crying…” Sirius sighs dejectedly. “Took me ages to calm him down and even longer to get him to move. Finally managed to put him to bed around one a.m.”

The three boys look at James in concern before following after him and taking a seat, mentally preparing themselves for whatever happens next between the two of you.

You enter the Great Hall a few minutes later and scan the table, looking for your friends.

“Oi! Y/L/N! Over here!” Sirius calls, waving his arm to get your attention.

You wave back at him enthusiastically before heading towards him with a smile. You come to an abrupt stop when you see James sitting with the boys- your boys- once more.

“Y/N! Hi! Good- good morning!” James greets with a smile.

Your smile drops as you stand there, staring at him with a blank expression. James swallows, his own smile starting to waver slightly.

“Can I just take a moment to tell you how absolutely stunning you look this morning?” He asks with a flirty grin, hoping that if he over exaggerates, you won’t be able to tell how nervous he actually is.

“Ew. No.” You grimace.

Confidence shot, James looks to Sirius for help.

“We asked James to join us for breakfast this morning.” He’s quick to interject. “You don’t mind, do you?”

You look away from James, taking in the hopeful expressions on your friends faces before setting your books down with a loud thud.

“I guess not.” You mumble, sitting down and starting to fill your plate up. “It’s not like I have much of a choice.”

Again, James looks to the marauders for support. Peter doesn’t even notice, already shoveling food into his mouth. Remus gives him a sympathetic shrug of his shoulders and Sirius gives him an encouraging thumbs up.

“What?” You ask after a few minutes, voice filled with irritation.

Sirius, Peter and Remus share a confused look before turning to you.

“Wha-“

“Do you need something?” You ask coldly, putting your spoon down and staring right at James.

James stares back with wide eyes, mouth parted in shock before he shakes his head.

“Who? Me? N-no! Everything’s fi-“

“Then can you stop staring at me?” You interrupt.

“S-sorry?” James stammers. He’s choking. He wasn’t expecting to get caught staring and now he’s choking- stuttering over his words like a damn fool. “I wasn’t-“

“I can tell your eyesight is shit.” You tell him bluntly. James subconsciously adjusts his glasses. “And while I can sympathize- or at least pretend to, I’d very much like to enjoy my breakfast in peace without you burning a hole into the side of my head from how piercing your gaze is so either lower it or risk going permanently blind.”

All four boys stare at you in shock, having never heard you speak like this before, let alone to James.

“Your choice.” You shrug with a fake smile before getting back to your breakfast.

James shares an uneasy look with Sirius before lowering his gaze to stare at his plate.

“Right…Sorry.”

“You’re about to be.” You warn before taking a sip of your tea.

Beside you, Peter lets out a high pitched giggle before quickly slapping a hand over his mouth. You turn to look at him with a confused smile.

“Sorry.” He apologizes, sheepishly dropping his hand. “I laugh whenever I feel uncomfortable…”

“You’re so cute.” You coo, pinching his cheek teasingly and laughing when he pulls away from you. “Oh my god, look at how red your ears are! Aw, are you getting shy Peter?”

“Stop.” He whines, covering his ears with his hands. “Let me eat! I have a test today.”

Everyone laughs at that before Sirius changes the topic, bringing up the latest run-in he had with Snivellus.

After a few minutes you scan the table, looking for something before groaning. A napkin is suddenly thrust into your face and you pull back with a surprised frown. You raise a brow at James and he smiles.

“Did ya need a napkin?” He asks, still smiling as he holds his out to you once more.

“No.” You tell him, still frowning.

“Oh…my mistake…” He apologizes, awkwardly putting his napkin back down.

You scan the food in front of you once more before turning your attention to Remus and Sirius.

“Do you see any oranges-“ James suddenly stands from his seat and hurries a few meters down the table before grabbing an orange from the fruit bowl and hurrying back.

He holds the orange up with a triumphant grin, chest heaving slightly as he tries to calm his breathing.

“I got an orange.” He pants.

“Congratulations.” You say simply, looking at him as if he’s crazy.

“Do you want it?” He asks, sitting back down.

You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously before looking at Remus who shakes his head, finding himself just as clueless as you are about the whole situation. You turn your gaze back to James and continue to stare at him.

“It’s yours! Here. Have it.” James announces, placing the orange in front of you. As soon as you start to reach for it, he takes it back, much to your annoyance. “Actually, let me peel it first.”

“Do I look like an idiot to you?” You suddenly ask him.

The four boys look at you with wide eyes.

“Huh?” James asks, confused.

“Do I look like an idiot?” You repeat firmly, holding his gaze.

“No.” James denies, vehemently shaking his head. “Of course not!”

“Then why would you think I can’t peel it myself?”

“I-I was only trying to help…” James says softly, gently setting the orange back on the table.

“Yeah well, I didn’t ask for your help. Nor do I want it. Just like I didn’t want you to compliment me this morning. Get it through your head, creep. I don’t want anything from you.”

The boys watch silently as you stand up and start to gather your belongings.

Wordlessly, James slides the orange across the table, hoping you’ll take it, hoping you'll accept his peace offering, but knowing you won’t.

“Keep it.” You tell James harshly before letting out a tired sigh. “Just, keep it and stay the hell away from me.”

With that, you get the rest of your things and turn around, quickly making your way out of the great hall.

“Was that the Potter charm you were talking about?” Sirius asks awkwardly, if only to ease the tension.

James groans, dropping his head into his hands.

“Fuck off, Pads.”

WHAT??? HOLD ME BACK HOLD ME BACK IM SO SERIOUS

Ranchero Miguel sketch inspired by this amazing little fic ❤️‍🔥