Note To Vacationing Non-Americans: While It’s True That America Doesn’t Always Have The Best Food

The more you look at this picture, the more anxious it becomes.

Ivan's the interpreter between Alfred and the babushkas and that's why he can get away with crushing on Al openly cause Al will never know. The conversations are all like "You two are such a nice couple. When's the wedding?" "She said you're very friendly and you should visit more." "Oh, thanks! Tell her I think she's sweet." "He says the wedding will be soon. In Alaska." By the time Alfred tries to talk to the ladies himself they're supposedly married with 50 children, a cat and a fucking whale

THAT’S SO CUTE?? also god i can just imagine ivan and the babushkas talking behind al’s back like,

the babushkas when meeting alfred for the first time: [in russian] ivan! you never told me your boyfriend was so handsome!

ivan replying in russian: isn’t he? he’s got the prettiest blue eyes, his smile is dazzling, and when he laughs it makes my heart melt.

al, oblivious: haha what are we talking about?

ivan, immediately: i told them you drool in your sleep

reblog this and put in the tags where youre from and what temperatures you think are too hot and too cold to go out in

Holy shit oh god oh fuck I stubbed my toe and it hurt really bad but then sorta stopped so I went into the living room and I only now look at my toe because it still hurts and it has a fucking pouch full of blood??? Help what do I do should I pop it? Leave it alone? Stick a straw in it and let a vampire suck the fluid out like a fruit gusher?

okay weirdest conversation i ever had this guy said that gay animals are okay but gay humans aren’t because we’re smarter and should know better

rb if you’re gay because you’re too stupid to know better

liberals: what about the children in Iran! us: uhh you mean the children that Iran leaders have raped, and killed for not obeying men, being gay or not wanting to marry at 10 hmmm okay yeah it's clearly just about "killing children"

Nobody goes to war looking to kill children. Very few people want to kill children. However, they are always a casualty. Regardless of whether you want to kill children or not, when you fight in civilian zones and target culturally important sites, there will be civilian casualties. The only way to avoid this is to not fight the war. War is devastating to everyone except those in power. And I do not support children being raped, killed for homosexuality, or being married off at 10. It is absolutely abhorrent when this happens, and a disgrace upon the world. However, this happens everywhere, not just Iran. It doesnt happen in Iran nearly as much as the pro war media would like you to believe. In fact, most Iranians are normal people, with normal lives, like you and me. Their government is conservative and corrupt, the same could be said of ours. This does not justify the start of a war that will take a toll on innocent people.

Idea: Alfred finally brings someone home. They head to the bedroom, open the door…

…and there’s a race car bed. :)

All 3 bitchj

Reblog if you ARE ASEXUAL, SUPPORT ASEXUALS, or own 619 THOUSAND COPIES OF BEE MOVIE