Can You Hear The Darkness Breathing?

"You cant have it all," they say

And that, for me, is fine

I don't need everything

Just enough to get by

I don't want a mansion,

Or love, or wealth

I just want to know

How to love myself

I'm curious why you don't use images in your posts?

It is my greatest hope that my writing is vivid enough that the mental picture it conjures would suffice (also I never thought about it)

When my sanity is tied so tightly to the notion

That you will always be mine

I hope you understand why I'm broken

When the strings of fate that tangled us together

Begin unraveling

Like the denumount of a bittersweet film

That I've seen coming but just can't bear to watch.

I've turned the ending in my mind

Like a smooth stone in my hand

Feeling for any scratch and mar

To justify holding on

Instead of skipping it on the surface of the sea.

-

5/14

When is the last time

That i thought

For myself?

My mechanical brain

Made of gears and gold

Robotic and cold

I do what im told

And nothing exceeding

What was programed

In my bones

Stars are what I reached for

The ground is what I hit

Life continues to beat me down

Like I don't deserve to live

One day I will die, I know

Till then it's misery

So let's cut out the middleman

And all just cease to be

You are the poem

That I dream to write

But fail to grasp

Each time

I'm back where I belong, it seems

By myself at last.

I tell myself it's what I need

But thoughts are coming fast.

Thoughts of Love #3

I wanted you before I knew what love was, but then I understood that it is a constant battle. I push away when you pull me in, I say I love you when you can't stand to look at me. Love is a war- a brutal fight. Because love isn't easy. We work, we fight, but when it comes down to it we both would take a bullet for the other. Even if we pulled the trigger.

Of all the insults you've thrown

"Soft" has hurt the most.

To hear that the years of love and laughter

That carved the lines in my cheeks

Were a weakness

Wounds me as much as the slaps you endured

At the hands of people far less soft than I.

In a moment my pain will pass, I know

And pity will set in

At how sad it is that you were raised

To see compassion as a flaw.

-

Day 3/14

I know it hurts right now, love

But believe me when i say

That the cold that you are feeling

Will one day go away

And maybe it will come again

But this time you will feel

Like welcoming it instead

And that is when you'll heal